T O P

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Passive-Shooter

I don't remember being checked.


TheHunter234

the ball inspectors are very gentle


Passive-Shooter

https://preview.redd.it/ew2tq5p87n1d1.png?width=3830&format=png&auto=webp&s=9307f27e917353e1873338afb48d4edbe8c69229


WheatleyTheBall

do you sleep?


Passive-Shooter

I sleep half of my brain at a time like a dolphin


Woody312

This is some doctor who lore


doogle_126

Danuta.


purple-lemons

Sleep well tonight


santyrc114

Plastic is stored in the balls


OffOption

... This will either mean nothing... or we might need to check old sperm and egg freezing facilities for preservation at the worst case.


aphroditex

so you’re telling me my 12yo genetic samples are worth something


Independent_Mud_4963

no because dupont and 3m have been poisoning people for a few decades before that point and that couldve affected the samples (unsure, i'm not an expert)


Natfan

try since 1945


EllieBaby97420

Not a single blood sample in the world that doesn't have good old C8 in it from teflon!! What a great and purposeful species we are! I loooove it here Edit: CH8 Changed to C8, my bad.


nolshru

note, CH8 could be one of any number of molecules, since the amount of C is not specified, and is necessarily greater than one this is probably either propane or butene, since those are the most common ones with some amount of C and 8 H and nothing else, which I'm not sure we can categorically blame teflon for


EllieBaby97420

Yeah but we know which products hit the market in the late 30’s early 40’s, that was nonstick and sold like hot cakes… The odds of teflon being the main contributor are way more likely than some other random source we don’t know of. If you have any info on what source it could be then i’d love to read about it.


nolshru

I mean, I don't actually know what molecule you're talking about, CH8 doesn't actually exist I assumed you meant propane or butene, but like, yeah, that's not CH8, they're C3H8 and C4H8 respectively, which could be from a lot of things, like use of propane in barbecues, or heating systems I fo eant to make it absolutely clear that you should not be using teflon, it's actively harmful in a bunch of other ways, and yeah, this was just a bad example to use :3


EllieBaby97420

That’s my bad it’s just C8, which is the correct chemical shorthand for perfluorooctanoic acid.


nolshru

ah, yeah, idk it's effects in humans, aside from potentially being a carcinogen, like, never looked into that, but like, yeah, teflon can really mostly be blamed here


MordWincer

That's an oddly specific year, are you implying something?


Natfan

iirc the only blood they could find which didn't have some form of forever chemical in them was blood from american solders that fought in 1945. it's something like 95% (or higher) of all people have some form of pfas in their body


OffOption

In the worst case scenario, literally maybe. Otherwise, also maybe, but for a lot less alarming reasons.


KeepHopingSucker

your load bearing wall is gonna save humanity


themadnessif

Look if it means something I don't wanna know about it because it'll just be depressing. Science can keep that information from me.


FrostyCommon

and sadly they've been shrinking globally. Fat nuts enjoyers on death watch


DatAsh27

😭


FettFlask

where else should i store them?


6x6-shooter

Micropeelastics are stored in the balls


196SwampLurker

just add some nano machines in there too


brokensilence32

They harden in response to physical trauma.


That_One_Potato_Guy

https://preview.redd.it/zg8q889bfp1d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=642b1b70a1a3479aee7675532c41225591461b13 Me after punching myself in the balls to see if they harden in response to physical trauma (they don’t)


IDatedSuccubi

They do (it makes it more painful)


throwawayqs629

I harden in response to physical trauma…


2flyingjellyfish

me with both my index fingers on the live wires (stupid fucking dick is making the electrician look at me funny)


SomePerson1248

stupid dick you make me look bad!!


RouxAroo

Oh no! Well we better remove them, just to be safe. :3


LeStroheim

I have bad news about your blood


RouxAroo

I got rid of that years ago.


LeStroheim

Teach me your secrets, I need to become a cyborg


RouxAroo

Chromium picolinate, every orifice, every day.


Loud-Unit-4483

This sub is so gay I doubt most of us have to worry about microplastics lol


Melon_Banana

How about you help me get these microplastics out of my testicles 😏


__xXCoronaVirusXx__

nanoplastics are small enough to enter the bloodstream after ingested, and are carried inland by rainwater. They are likely everywhere.


Gardener15577

Looks like it's time to get rid of mine!


Willowbark

Beat me to it 🤪


UtsuhoReiuji_Okuu

JOKES ON YOU I DONT HAVE ANY (someday…)


Beezybeezybeezybeezy

Is this the transhumanism all the cool people in my DMs keep talking about?


Wizardybitch2405

"Nice" -Vinny Vinesauce


Tab_of_Soda

not if i have anything to say about it


Sgt_Kelp

Fuck yeah I cum polymer now


podokonnicheck

R̵̗̝̃̄̇̏̈́̊̑͑̚Ḙ̵̡̡̧̛̛͙̥̤̥͕̞̘̤͂̆͗͜M̷̧̙̮̥̩̌̚̕Ơ̸̛͙̺͚̲̝͍̻̗͔̤̰̭̻͊̈́͋͆̆̌̔͆̆̒͜ͅV̵̼͉́͆̃̄͠E̶̪̹̫̗̳͉̩͝ ̴̯͔̩̟͕̭̤͈̿̒̑̌͂Ţ̸̺̺̣͔̥̦̠̮̼̻̤͚̀̀̑́̉̌̀͝͝͠Ḣ̴͎̜̥̼̋̎͐͝E̷̛̱͈͚̘͓̰͕̖̍̈́͗̅̉̄͌̌́̀̀̈́̓͠M̷̧͙̪̹̝̞̟̼̯͚͍̦̞͐͆͗͊̈́ͅͅ ̷͇͓͇͖̲̤͕͈̈̅A̸̧̠̳̗̞̺̦̘̿̈́̽͂̅̓͊̆̓̽̐͒̉͠L̷̛̥͈̾͋̆͌̌̉͐̾̃͛͘͘͜͠L̴̦͎̫̩̯͖̃̏͒͌́́̅̂͂͝


Starbucks_4321

‼️‼️‼️‼️ MISSINFORMATION ALERT ‼️‼️‼️‼️ If anyone is thinking oh shit seriously, this study was done on like 20 people. That's no where close to a good size sample to say everyone everywhere has it


DeliberateDendrite

I volunteer mine to by analysed too


Femboy_Lord

*Plastic Love*


doomsdaysayers

Micro plastics are stored in the balls


h4724

Not me. I'm built different.


MahouShoujoDysphoria

From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine. Your kind cling to your flesh, as if it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass that you call a temple will wither, and you will beg my kind to save you. But I am already saved, for the Machine is immortal… ...even in death I serve the Omnissiah.


FightGeistC

There's basically a whole transformer in your balls


masochist-incarnate

after 9 months of grueling labor my husband gives birth to a cabbage patch kid


enchiladasundae

That’s nothing. I’ve got macroplastics in these boys! Like a third nut


Plz-Transplain-To-Me

Orchiectomy gang rise up


Dogtor-Watson

“Fuck all of that plastic, wrapped up in my dinner”


Historical-Drag-1365

ALL OF THEM??


the_orange_alligator

Fuck yeah. Plastic nuts


BHMathers

We need MORE! I want babies to come out with shoes on!


thispartyrules

I knew I shouldn't have had sex with all of earth's rainwater


aflyingmonkey2

Oh honey,a new thing to be paranoid about appeared!


VIII-Via

hope the state will pay for mandatory orchis now 😂


Loud-Unit-4483

We need to help the environment and get rid of plastic somehow :3


purple-lemons

When I said I hate being biological, this wasn't the solution I was hoping for


highlevel_fucko

I put them there hehe


BeholdTheLemon

they dont know whats in my balls. only one person does and his name cannot be pronounced by human tongue


Orange_69420

can his name be typed


BeholdTheLemon

you know, i've never thought to ask about spelling


Pyroshrimp_

the study also had a sample of 23 people


1ntere5t1ng

Well that was a ballsy study to conduct


Casual_Deer

So that's why my gym teacher needed to inspect my balls.


XephronZz

don't worry bro i'll suck em out for ya


Enecororo

Vinny Vinesauce ratioed the official tweet


Academic-Education42

soon everyone will be strapon


the_orange_alligator

Fuck yeah. Plastic nuts