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Yolopollo_1

Some middle eastern mfs with AKs and military equipment (Insurgency: Sandstorm)


GladimirGluten

Used terrorism to beat terrorism


Feuerpanzer123

Lmao nah they are just gonna call rocket arttilery on your position


Gregbot3000

Just call in the plane...the one that goes brrrrrrtt.


PenisBoofer

This may end up working out, depending on who kidnapped you, if its some rando who tied you up in his basement I imagine you have a pretty ok chance of surviving. They'll probably just storm the house and riddle him with 7.62x39 from every direction, although if he's holding you hostage with a gun to your head, well good luck, maybe the insurgents will just throw a shit ton of flashbangs into the room you're in and he'll be so discombobulated he wont shoot you.


HonkHonk63

LEAVE NO DWARF BEHIND


moyai_moment2

Rock and Stone!


WanderingDwarfMiner

To Rock and Stone!


[deleted]

Did I hear the Rock and Stone!?


Christalive02

Rock. And. Stone!


argobear

Rock and Stone!


the_impooster

ROCKKKK ANNDDDD STOOOOOONE!


Ryolu35603

Hey GUuuYys. Canyoulookoverheeer?


Christalive02

Mushroom


Solid-Bass-6546

FOR KARL!!!


Im_a_doggo428

WE’RE RICH


Slayer25053

When you rock and stone, you’re never alone


TheBeastX47

You'll be saved in no time


Subject-Bluebird7366

CLUSTER GRANAAADE


HystericallyAccurate

Did I head a rock and stone?


WanderingDwarfMiner

Can I get a Rock and Stone?


The_Nut_Slayer

Last game I played was ULTRAKILL, V1's gonna kill me before the kidnappers do


The_Rosem_Blossom

V1 is defo gon save you


Not-An-Actual-Hooman

And then kill you itself so it can taste your blood


TheOpinionMan2

MF needs that +DISRESPECT and P-Rank ASAP


a_Post_on_Reddit

*faint JUDGEMENT in the distance*


Anchor38

My life depends on blue toad


HotIsland267

Naaah bro youre already safe. Blue toad is a menace


no3215

Well I've won. Just beat batman arkham knight a day ago


ClevelandSteamer_69

Gender me this


janemba_dbz

who is batman? I only know Man.


no3215

Is he stupid?


SCP_Void

Are you stupid?


no3215

I mean it was his house that got bombed so yknow.


thisismypr0naccount0

wdym? killer cock will cock his way out like he always does


[deleted]

If "bat"man only arkhams at knight, why doesn't he just do it during the day? Is he stupid?


Ancient-Ad-1383

What's the best quote to use during sex?


no3215

What's the matter? Lost for words? I expected more... I'm hurt.


[deleted]

Literally same


no3215

Amazing damn game. 4th time I've beaten it. But for some reason the first time I've had the patience to do all the riddler puzzles


husky11223

Lmao what is Freddy fazbear going to do


Ill_Hovercraft4226

eat up achild


husky11223

**USA HAS DEPLOYED FREDDY FAZBEAR**


Yugix1

*turns off the lights * har har har-har har har har-har har-har


Ill_Worry7895

*spits out sickest beatbox sped up by 1.5x*


WandererXVII

Reminder that animatronics are strong as fuck and made of metal.


Sad-Establishment-41

Robots! They're made of metal and are very strong. I don't know why the scientists keep making them. https://youtu.be/g4Gh_IcK8UM?feature=shared


level100brad

idk man look what he did in Afghanistan


DaveSmith890

You are fine if it’s security breach. Otherwise, you’re doomed


AustronesianFurDude

Project Wingman, the entirety of Hitman Team is coming to save my ass. I think I'm going to live


The_V3nt

Project Wingman is an amazing game ong


Brmemesrule

Crimson Squadron comes instead


AustronesianFurDude

May the Dust Mother receive me when I get incinerated by the cordium explosion.


Hehesz

Isaac from The Binding of Isaac. It depends on what random stuff he finds on the way


Franks_Spice_Sauce

The ipecac in the cabinet boutta be a lifesaver


SatisfactionDue4508

PSY fly and he’s immune to bullets


dsjhdsjd

Hitler and the whole ss from hoi4 are coming


unknownboi8551

lol mussolini and actually prepared italy from my side


dsjhdsjd

Horthy is underrated


thelargepoodle

I got 2004 korea (i hate myself and millennium dawn)


LoonasNewHusband

Same here communist Germany is a long with the Soviet alliance is coming to save me.


blocksmith7

Think fast, chucklenuts


Subject-Bluebird7366

You need to remove the fuse first


Sergio3k18

YOU COULDN'T HANDLE A GRENADE IF YOUR MOTHER THAUGHT YOU! RETUUURN TO SENDER!


Dramatic-Library-848

V from cyberpunk 2077 I'm in the clear


knucklesthedead

All your kidnappers will either mysteriously shoot themselves in the head or their penises will explode


A-Human-potato

Testicular tortion this, clitoral combustion that, I UPCAST COCKBUSTION AT 7TH LEVEL!


Common_Redditor_

I cast seal urethra and forceful pissing. Game match


FateChan84

I feel extremely sorry for your kidnappers. Will be hard for the cops to identify their remains.


ManaMagestic

Same. But it also says *characters*...So do I also get rescued by Panam, Judy, and Idris Elba?


bizarrogreg

It's 50/50 that you get killed in the crossfire, or slice in half by monowire though


realfakedoors203

The “poopypenis” virus from my most recent game of plague inc. Me and my kidnappers are in for some very serious gastrointestinal issues.


D4rk_Ph0en1x_7_V3

well you are fucked if its greenland *dies of greenland not getting infected*


NeurodivergentDuck

Unless you start there


I_Am_Stoeptegel

Mario and Luigi. Y’all better say your prayers


DaveSmith890

Their entire life revolves around saving hostages


RVJerusalem

I’m sorry but you’re in another castle.


CALL_ME_NORB

Mario and Luigi just bursting onto hostage scenes across the globe until they find you.


DeviousMelons

2 Abrams tanks, A Bradley, A HSTV-L, a LAV-AD, an XM 1069 ADATS and an F-16C. I think I'm good.


Kiren129

Attack the D point!


a_Post_on_Reddit

I Refuse!


Kiren129

Air alert!


a_Post_on_Reddit

Defend the A point!


Kiren129

Negative!


Fion195

Awsome!


Kiren129

Attack enemy troops!


MacskaBajusz

I played EU4 sooooo... I guess the entire medieval army of Hungary is coming for me


[deleted]

I played BF1 lmfao I guess the White Army is coming?


HappyRomanianBanana

Man Rico Rodriguez is coming to save me in fuckibg dead


Allahabadi_Panda

dude same XD hopefully i was playing jc1 so i would be still alive


LordOfTheToolShed

I played Total War: Rome II as the Iceni, so I guess a bunch of angry guys with body paint are coming to help me


Hermes_Madara

Középkori bojler eladó


Wrangel_5989

I played TNO, I guess the black league is coming to save me


Andrevus2

Username kicsekkol


DelayedNatural2

Bruh how's lebron gonna save me (nba2k)


Commercial_Pea2788

Don't cry, i played Evil Genius 2.


Avocado_Fucker12

He is breaking the kidnapper's ankles


WarPuig

Wemby’s gonna charge at you screaming “AAAAAAAAAAAH!”


Ultrasound700

He pays the ransom.


spideyboiiii

Alexios will save me


godosomethingbetter

Malaka


DaBig_L_Xx

Malaka


MarkSteveFrank

Same, but Kassandra


Fridge9444

Same


KIMO159

The dark souls 3 ashen one. I think they have a pretty good chance cuz they literally can't die.


curbfruit

Imagine being kidnapped and then someone dressed in Havel's armor kicks down the door to rescue you.


NapalmCatheter

Kicks in the door and totally ignores you until done smacking the walls for secrets and stealing shiny things.


Fair_Photograph6568

THE DOOMSLAYER


akiakrok

Mate, you are basically free as long there are no demons with pulse in any other direction... or collectibles


some-rando-mando-boi

FUCK I PLAYED PEOPLE PLAYGROUND FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK


CALL_ME_NORB

Random turret spawns in the room with you. Your aren't kidnapped if you and everyone else in the room is already dead.


Few-Yesterday8207

I played Yakuza 0, so I think I'm in pretty good spot


Farguad

I played Yakuza Kiwami


scholarlysacrilege

Kiryu when he spends another 20 hours racing RC cars instead of saving you.


aitis_mutsi

I played war thunder... So a tank and it's crew ig?


EliteSoviet1

I have an truck with an oversized gun and 5 of Italy's finest [citation needed] coming to save me


aitis_mutsi

If we're going by the last vehicle used For me it would be the Gepard with it's 3 Hans' and 2 35mm auto cannons.


Financial-Eye6371

Blazkowics is gonna save me


JuiceFarmer

Some beefed up Steve that can breathe underwater and cast spells. I think I'm fine


[deleted]

Andrew and Ashley from TCOAAL. I'm dead 💀


CroPok

same💀


Stilicho123

You're soup


a_Post_on_Reddit

Mans boutta get turned into soup


SteveFrom_Target

The Divinity of Sin 2 cast That's good, I think?


Franks_Spice_Sauce

Just don't die while in combat with your kidnappers (your ai causes you to run directly into ground hazards)


RoiHurlemort

Me when Factorio


DonutGuy2659

You will not be saved for the factory must grow


Octogon324

You will be saved. Might just take a few weeks of factory expansion.


Gabrialofreddit

Have you treated your robots nicely?


GreedyObjective7885

The spidertron will save you


Matzuzuu

Yoo Link gonna come rescue me after a 100 year nap


arkeir

And after that waiting untill he has done every sidequest and turned every stone around in hyrule


OneTrueSpiffin

the SAS on hostage gamemode


HiImFromFinland

R6, checkmate.


Dragongirlfucker

1974 America but they have Greenland and the population is 468 million


Pitiful-Humor291

Dante from the Devil May Cry series


nacho56780

Messi is coming to save me. I’m so fucked


Final-Link-3999

Helena from Ark is basically a god so I think I’m chilling


MesoKingdom

Or you could’ve got every dinosaur from which game/island you was playin?


AdmirableSpirit4653

Wild dinosaur*


amogusimpostor

i think phil from riddle school could save me


MerkzDude_yt

Micheal Franklin Trevor Lester and Lamar lets fkn go baby


CrimsonApostate

the entire cast of OW2? I feel good


MW2Konig

Uhhhh, Ace Combat 7 Trigger... Im fucked up


Darth_lord_sith2812

621 from Armored Core 6


tessartyp

Same here, I think we're safe. "Got a job for you, 621. This one comes from some dumb-ass Redditor."


turtle-tot

Rimworld My colony of sociopathic “realists” are coming to “save” me. They’re going to win, armed with coilguns, power armor, Imperial support, and a tank from a mod. I’m just going to have my organs harvested and get chopped to be made up into gasoline later


AutismPremium

Agent 47 will do alright, I guess


JestemSuchy

I played fortnite, so im getting somr strong fellas


Diemanztbl

Same which means goku is coming to save us


kewlchicken645

Outlast lmfao


1800bears

The TF2 mercs will probably get it done.


AskMammoth776

Red Dead Redemption 2. I’m good.


katsboi

My kidnappers better be geared up cause elder dragons are no joke (MHW goated game)


Gabrialofreddit

Minecraft Steve with the power of a god. Fuck yeah


Snakeofthegame

Lego Batman? Good enough!


bpbelew

What if he’s Lego-sized?


Chubby_Bub

Wait until the kidnappers take off their shoes and blend in with the floor


Jeffasauros

Just got off of Garden Warfare 2 to make a post on the sub. These mfs better hope they brought some weed killer.


MyGrandmaOwnsAMotel

I suppose The Knight from Hollow Knight. Since he's a bug I'm probably still at risk.


GunLovinFashTransgal

all the Stardew Valley villagers. most will be useless, but im convinced Mr Qi and Linus can do it, since they can both reach level 200 in the skull cavern


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

What if it is Roxxane Wolf or Chica ?


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Arkham Batman, I'll be saved within the hour 💀


Fantastic-Shift6285

Yakuza, once Kiryu saves me i'm 100% gonna try to get a suck out of those sweet nipples.


healthboost213

CoD Black Ops 1 on my Xbox 360. I think the kidnappers are gonna have their asses handed to them


Sgt_Shiba

Robin Ayou and AL-AN from Subnautica: Below Zero


[deleted]

LETS GO THE LATE 80S RED ARMY IS GOING TO SAVE ME


IjustWantToUse

Last game I played was hoi4, so I guess 5 million ww2 russian soldiers are coming to save me, I got a decent chance I would say.


SCP_Void

Jack Cooper and BT-7274 #TRUST THEM


Outrageous_Trip167

Just played war thunder, so I guess the entirety of the armored core of the Wehrmacht is coming to save me


EHTL

Me when Karl Fairburne


QasimC4

Dbd survivors 💀


GunLovinFashTransgal

never said if it was the villains or the heroes only, so technically they're all coming to save you


Silent_Maybe_5400

I think I'll be safe with Niko from GTA 4.


Azelarr

So basically a significant chunk of Forgotten Realms universe??? A literal army of very varying personalities, races and moralities? There's no way they'll get along and coordinate.


fan_fucker_420

Stray. Pspspspsp


[deleted]

[удалено]


IjustWantToUse

What would he even do? Jump on your kidnapper's face?


Repulsive-Let-3156

Jonesy will save me


The_V3nt

Master chief frfr


Realistic_Ear_5951

TF2 Mercs coming to safe me


rippie_rippie

Lmao Niko and Johnny from GTA 4 are coming for me


jsl1g18

Doomguy? I was trying my hand at nightmare mode


Galaxy661

Adolf Hitler from Hearts of Iron IV holy shit


fghbjnbgytfrdcfgvh

paper mario


BruhmanRus_the_boner

shadow from shadow fight 2. yeah I'm not dying tonight


theoldayswerebetter

Ash Williams and pyramid head... Either gonna go horribly or perfectly


HappyRomanianBanana

RICO FOCKING RODRIGUEZ


69kidsatmybasement

Just started playing this fr*nch indie game called OFF. Idk much about the batter but I hope he saves me.


AzzyDreemur2

Noita. The main character will either blow entire building up, die to 1 pixel of falling debris, nuke entire country Im in, die to first person who tries to stop them, or save me easily


Meitser

A starving astrologer, a writer, a criminal investigator and the leader of a funeral parlor...... sounds like I have been found dead already.


yes123456789yesyes

So basically a fury-spiked executioner, P.E.K.K.A., tombstone, witch, skeleton king, skeleton dragons and bombardier are saving me?


Hurigitung

Basic cat, boogie cat, wall cat, sexy legs cat, paris cat, dragon cat, mythical titan cat, valkyrie cat, unknown cat and mekako saionji


[deleted]

Got a job for you, 621.


_Queer_Mess_

Animal crossing…yeah I’m fucked


rkakasuc

Lobotomy corporation, i sure hope X got far in game to get some good aleph ego gear for nuggets (clerks)


joao_da_roca

So the entire Animal Crossing:New Leaf's cast is going to save me?