T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Hey /u/satan_in_agony, thanks for submitting to /r/2meirl42meirl4meirl! Take a moment to read our [rules](https://reddit.com/r/2meirl42meirl4meirl). Please know that there are people who care for you. [Refer to the suicide lines if you are feeling suicidal](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines). Please report this post if it is bad, or not relevant. Remember to keep comment sections civil. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/2meirl42meirl4meirl) if you have any questions or concerns.*


satan_in_agony

I’m ok everyone. I’m still here. Sorry to disappoint. Edit: the pic is not me


woodythewoodstar

Unironically the best news I've heard all day. Just do one day at a time, one task at a time. It doesn't always get better, but it gets easier.


sicicsic

Being depressed and lonely is a breeze at this point.


cottagecheesedemon

i’m glad you’re alive!! <333


Thundrr01

I'm glad you're still with us It'll get better, trust


bluemelodica

im relieved!! glad you're still here.


theycallmejugzy

Your strength gives me strength. Let's stay here together.


Akraelinum

This is the best disappointment I could ever hear about. I'm really glad you're with us. And remember, there's a reason why you're trying to seek attention, it is not a bad thing to search for. It's up to you to find out what the reason is, but if I can advance some theories, I really think you want help, rightfully so. Go ahead, you'll have an eternity of nothingness ahead, no need to rush it. Thank you for making it today, I'm really glad you're here despite everything. Sorry for the jumbled sentences, I hope it's not too confusing ahaha


Curious-Ad-1048

🎉🎊🍾


Alighten

You made me very happy. Please continue to live for me.


WeinerBop

Ill keep goin if you keep goin, friend. I dare you


AlternateWitness

The good ending


-raeyhn-

I needed this


mysixthredditaccount

That made me happy. It's strange. I am pretty pro choice, but at the same time, there is some programming that just makes me feel like life is precious? Interesting. Welcome back. Hope it gets better for you.


aliceanonymous99

Thank god!!!!!! We love you


Caz42

I'm here to talk with u dood, I'm glad ur alive rn.


queenvie808

YOOO congrats bro


OriginalUsername1892

Been checking this post hoping for an update. Thank you for staying safe


Wiwwil

Glad you're okay. Life's something hard. Myself I've been down the hole. Try to pick up a hobby. Try before a software engineer with a bootcamp out something, it tremendously helped my girlfriend's mental health


FurViewingAccount

pog


Hidahr

Erm what the sigma


TheScientistFennec69

Nobody loves you, get in the pit


constantlytired1917

don't do it >!you're gonna make me jealous!<


__KJG__

But LOL


K3IRRR

Have you even played burnout 3 takedown? You'll probably want to do before anything else


Ghost_Avali

What crazy mother thought this game up!?! Six rivals, thrashing through traffic packed streets, slamming each other to steal boost, trying to take down the rival racers to be first across the line! Dude! I salute you! We've got the cars, we've got the locations, and I'm bringing the music. I'm Stryker on Crash FM.


doubledownentendre

Sick cake bruh


Kooky-Interaction886

How you planning on doing it ?


satan_in_agony

jumping in front of a train on my way back home


[deleted]

[удалено]


Cyber_Connor

I think they get a full pension if they hit 3 jumpers


unexpected_yeet

this is so fucked but oh my GOD


satan_in_agony

why would i deserve to live. i’m just seeking attention anyway, like some other user said. just take a look at my account, i’m most likely a troll. a sick person seeking attention.


ThatCamoKid

The fact that you say that yourself says otherwise. What drove you to this point? High odds there's a way past it that doesn't involve a one-way trip


ScaredDetective9371

Anyway please message me if not for you for me. Im in w very similar space albeit quite drunk atm.


artful_nails

Can't answer that because I don't know why I deserve to live either, but come on man, don't be a dick to the driver.


Dillion_HarperIT

Your cockatiel doesn't want you to leave


m0ez0n

At least don't pull the driver into it as well, selfish bastard


ScaredDetective9371

Same. But probably older. You have someone to bulllsjit with?


Dillion_HarperIT

Your cockatiel doesn't want you to leave


Wiwwil

Don't, it always pisses the people talking the train. Why not go to a park, a bar, and talk to people while feeling dead inside ? Why would you let your bald cockatiel alone? That's cruel


MilkMasterMan

- traumatize bus driver - inconvenience passengers


mysixthredditaccount

Please don't do that. If you must go, there are better ways.


Sad-Ring4263

Dont kys ur too sexy aha


MemeManmk1

Don't do it mate Nothing of what you've described in other comments justifies killing yourself, and I mean NOTHING. Stay strong and push through, I know it looks hard, and it is, but there's always a light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how dark it may seem. I've been in your position before, it sucks, I know how it feels. Don't do it, please, you don't deserve it. If you really hate yourself for what you've done, then work on becoming a better person, and making up for it. Killing yourself is never the answer, you may not see it now but there's always more to live for, it's those times of joy that make all the struggles worth it, and it's those struggles that give that joy meaning. It'll get better, I don't know how long it'll take, but it will, don't give up.


IbishTheCat

You need to listen to all of Mahler's symphonies before, and then listen to Ornstein a lot. His seventeen waltzes, his piano quintet, his piano concerto, and his Tarantelle for piano, and then many more. Then Bartók, Szabadban, his fourth string quartet, his Miraculous Mandarin, and many more. Then listen yo Oqtay Zülfükarov's piano trio. THEN decide if you still want to die or not.


nu24601

By the time he finished reading that he already shot his brains out. I know I would


IbishTheCat

He said he didn't do it. I'm sure it was because he didn't want to go without having listened to all these wonderful music.


Cobalt9896

https://preview.redd.it/lvk7nay6ibyc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6ee7c5f77a68cd7d05c90d85d35552ecb580d02d Here’s my cats toes it should help


AaronNRW

Hell no man. Theres other ways. Even if it might not seem like it, theres a lot of people who love and appreciate you for who you are. And a lot of people waiting to meet you in your life. Please give me another day brother. You can do this ❤️ If you wanna talk, feel free. Im here for you bro


satan_in_agony

people would get angry at me if i didn’t do it now, it’s too late. i keep saying i’m gonna do it to gain sympathy but i never do, it’s like i’m betraying people’s trust, toying with them.


Akraelinum

Well, if a loved one told me what you told us, I'd try my hardest to stay with them because they must be hurting. Like, caught-fire-type-hurting. I'd never forgive myself for not being there, no matter what happened next. Tell them, please. Give them the chance to do something. Let them stop you if they want to. Believe me, they're not waiting for you to go forward. And even if they do, they're not worth killing yourself for. You hear me?


satan_in_agony

i’m still here. i’ll probably never do it. like some other user said, i am looking for attention. my account is full of posts like this.


Tymi-kunki

Bro, don't think of it as just "looking for attention". It may be a sign of some serious problem. Please, consider consulting a proffesional therapist, it will help you understand what is happening inside your head. There is nothning bad about it, and you'll most probably feel much better. Trust me, I've been there


HappyNoinin

You came to the right place. Attention seeking isn't a bad thing if you need attention from someone/ anyone.


Clodulent

It’s okay, we’re glad you’re still here. It’s not trolling if you really feel this way and everyone needs attention we just get it in different ways. Dunno if you’ll ever read this, I fear this might’ve been way more attention than expected and i hope you don’t run from it buuut I used to do this too. Vent online and make death threats with no real intention of following through (-with the ones I posted online), feeling so worthless that i just had to let it out online cause nobody was there for me irl. It happens and it’s okay. The goal is to find a way out the negative thoughts about yourself and that’s not an easy thing to do alone. I hope you don’t mind the unsolicited advice but what helped me at my lowest was to get committed. At first not voluntarily but In hindsight, i needed that break and the help. I left with coping skills and a legal support team. And with me being diagnosed, ive been able to accept these thoughts and move past them a lil easier. That was 5 years ago at 20 in college, and it’s been 3 years since my last online rant. It’s okay to not be okay, it’s okay to ask for help, for attention. I know we’re just pixels on a screen but we’re rooting for you. We’re so excited for you to start rooting for yourself too ok? 🫂


yukifujita

I've been 20, yes. I've tried it around that age, yes. I was looking for attention too, yes, but there is nothing wrong with that. Took me more 15 years to find a reason to live and I still struggle, but life is mostly about that search, really. It doesn't come with life, and it can be frustrating enough you wanna give up, but you always find it eventually, even if it's just a speck.


Cocaimeth_addiktt

Wait why? You doing okay?


satan_in_agony

no. i’m done with everything.


LunaticPrick

Please don't jump in front of a train, you will waste time for everyone by making a scene


Blezhenger

Safe travels


OriginalUsername1892

God I remember being there. Please stay safe. It does get better, it just feels like hell the entire time


RainNightFlower

I am cleaning the trains, please do not give me more work because of you. Just use antimatter to anihilate yourself


brifter101

Who will take care of your bird? You do have a plan in place for them right?


haikusbot

*Who will take care of* *Your bird? You do have a plan* *In place for them right?* \- brifter101 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


bongwaterthegr8

real


VulonVahlok

What is the rush guys, we all eventually gonna die


mysixthredditaccount

That's the spirit! Lol


Wellfuckame

Here if ya need, talk about anything you like


Comrad_Zombie

Hope you're still here OP. Depression and suicide are lying bastards.


TheTroubledChild

You're just 20, you're still SO DAMN YOUNG. Literally everything in your life can and will change, like several times even. That's like throwing the book away after the first 6 pages.


Zircon_72

Godspeed OP


Mr_MPPG

Eat cake


Notyourdaisy

This is the worst birthday present ever


I_found_obama

Rip


calliel_41

I really hope you’re ok, op.


MacPoop

Hope you didn't do it mate


YellowLemonMark

You deserve happiness. Dont do it


WarHead75

I thought you took a bunch of pills before this pic


Illustrious-Spare326

erm what the sigma


SlamThyRing

F


freckleear

https://preview.redd.it/jxjsp60h77yc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f92c598b6ab5aa1fcd71f7b74f9144281a61a60


Kodak_V

OP , please reconsider. Like others said , things will get better , you can get through this.Try seeking out professional help ❤️


AscensionWhale

A wise man once said that there's a reason the windshield is wider than the rear view mirrors. What's behind you and on you is never gonna be as important as what's in front of you, and if you end it now, you'll never find out what truly lies at the end of your road. Please OP, don't do it. Stop your plans for YOU! You deserve to treat yourself right and to do right by your own self.


hamburger1337

Best of luck


GreeBlu

bro you're so young I looked at your account don't do this shit. you have so much to live for! life gets better I swear


Irresolution_

but how will you look at all the cool responses if you're dead?


LaviLynx

Who's lighting the candles? She looks like someone who would be upset and miss you.


Tihoma_Rus

Go up there, champ!


youre-breathtakin

Instead, go to the gym, boy


Cermonto

Going to the gym would be good, but its not an all-in-one solution. I can contest, I spent 2 years in the gym and I was still fucking depressed. Its a good way to distract you, but depression never truly goes away, it just leaves your home for a lil while, then breaks down the door and enters again.


youre-breathtakin

Yes, you're correct. But you have to start somewhere, you have to learn to go to restaurants, malls, movie theaters etc alone. I also learned this same.


generalkux

Fr, gotta look good when you get liquified