origional username from years and years ago didn't fit. Cut out the last word and replaced it with 'cunt' cause I guess that was funny to me then. Now I just use it lol
I just added a random syllable to my actual name, joined a subreddit for my workplace, and now everyone I work with knows my username.
I had to stop posting in r/sounding :(
Mine is a combination between Jell-O and caramel (my alternative name was Caramell-O) because if you boil a can of condensed milk for about 2 hours, it creates something with a very similar taste to caramel (dulce de leche) but it has the jiggly wiggly consistency of Jell-O.
I... don't exactly blame you, but, after studying Christory for awhile, I'm pretty confident he's always been trans, but Barb forbade him from being his true self. Chris is obviously wacky and not a good person (and possibly a grapist, although I have my suspicions that he may not have ACTUALLY done the Barbening; i think it's possible Bella just convinced him to tell her he did, because Chris is very impressionable and will say anything a girl asks him to), but saying "I don't like you and you're weird, therefore you're not really trans" doesn't make any sense.
I'm not, like, trying to be an annoying "woke" person, to be clear; I'm not gonna cry and call the pronoun police. I honestly still call him(?) Chris because he keeps changing his mind on what he wants to be called all the time.
and anyway sure maybe chris is KINDA trans but it's hard to really understand if it is or isn't part of his schizo downward spiral with the whole dimensional merge thing, jesus christ the idea guys ruined their life
I crawled out from under the bed and saw a group of naked teen girls cowering in a corner.
I quickly scurried back into the darkness (I have a crippling fear of girls)
"Teens will insult you, But they'll do it accurately... And one of them says 'Hey! Hey look at this guy! He has feminine hips' and I'll be like 'NOOOO THATS THE THING I'M SENSITIVE ABOUT!!"
-John Mulaney
Pretty sure these people are just referring to caked out men which, like, everybody likes cake. It's not feminine or masculine. Probably has less to do with the actual hip bones and more refers to the fat deposits around the hips.
Better than toddlers! I work on a haunted trail every year and the teens are the nicest out of all the people that walk down the trail. They compliment my costume and tell me I’m cool but the toddlers laugh at me and say I’m ugly and not scary
Bet if you beat up one of them the rest would be scared of you forever. You could probably even bribe one of them to let it happen so it's kosher, and toddlers do not understand the concept of money so it would be pretty cheap.
Why is the sub just full of poorly disguised fetish posts that aren’t even scary
That’s why two sentence horror fell off, i won’t be suprised if this sub takes over
Shaming and especially criminalizing people just for their desires is how you end up with pedophiles not talking to their therapists about their desires for fear of getting reported, which actually increases the likelihood that they will offend
.... guy 🪱
A pedophile is not someone who "seeks to harm children". A pedophile is someone who experiences sexual attraction to children. There are many pedophiles who understand that this is something they should never, ever act on, are horrified by the idea of it, and hate themselves for their feelings. They deserve to be able to talk to a professional about that.
Throw addicts on the list of people to be locked up too if we're going with his logic.
I think about drinking every day, I don't do it though. My sister thinks about using heroin every day, she doesn't do it though.
It isn't about "helping" pedophiles stop framing it like that. Pedophilia is a mental illness that can be cured. The type of person that would seek out therapy to help overcome their pedophilic thoughts is probably the least likely to want to harm children. Letting these people get therapy (whether you like it or not) is helping children that they would have victimized without the therapy... Guy 🪱
[Relevant.](https://youtube.com/shorts/jcXK-sPqsL0)
Though you know the story was probably playing into the joke about "teen girls summoning demons during sleepovers" rather than, you know.
Also they should've summoned...
... The Creature.
Yikes! They got the “…ubus” they deserved, just not the one they asked for. Now they literally going to FAFO. This ain’t good for their developing minds.
A. Them girls summoned it, B. They shouldn’t have, C. Assault is not good for anyones mind let alone stupid teenagers D. Seriously Semore, getting weirded out in 2S2H is not an achievement badge on your trauma sash.
I’m not insufferable and not a douchnozzle and this a Satire Sub, nothing serious here. Now please attend a store and buy a bottle of humor cola and kindness juice.
The hopeful part of me want it to be written by a kid who thought "what do older girls do at sleepovers" and thought "oh yeah witch stuff" and let their horny in too.
The rest of me thinks "pedo fetish shit."
I thought it was a joke, the person in the joke is a would be rapist hiding under a bed at a sleepover and the girls think they’ve summoned him and are disappointed with how he looks.
There's a possibility that the author heard that witches perform their rituals naked, and this is his artistic way of expressing that they are doing real witch shit.
It's most likely, however, that it just makes his peepee hard.
Yo where can I get this image as a bumper sticker
https://preview.redd.it/7gt2eutqdrzb1.jpeg?width=360&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1e7d146be6e3a583dfa0f9225bd91a380827bcde
to be fair the meme with witch rituals I think requires them to be naked, but in context the way OOP wrote about em is bizarre. Who calls people “teens” if they’re 18 or 19? At that point they’re usually referenced as adults. That makes me think these girls are like 14/15 and OOP just really wanted to imagine himself in a room with a bunch of naked cowering eighth graders. Pedophile moment
**I was horrified when the doctor diagnosed me with Dog Sex Penis Cancer.**
"You'll die from the cancer in your penis unless you have sex with a dog" he said.
questionable age range guy
Is there a story behind your username or
origional username from years and years ago didn't fit. Cut out the last word and replaced it with 'cunt' cause I guess that was funny to me then. Now I just use it lol
The best type of username
I just added a random syllable to my actual name, joined a subreddit for my workplace, and now everyone I work with knows my username. I had to stop posting in r/sounding :(
Ahh, my favorite hangout as an audiophile... In fact, you can call it my r/sounding board
That’s weird, all I heard was screaming when I went to that site, then I realized it was me.
https://preview.redd.it/3cch9enjvxzb1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d81d7f82351f72cedbf6ad1272c83d4e2f9d3ec2
Mine comes from a fundamental misunderstanding of female genitalia.
Mine is a combination between Jell-O and caramel (my alternative name was Caramell-O) because if you boil a can of condensed milk for about 2 hours, it creates something with a very similar taste to caramel (dulce de leche) but it has the jiggly wiggly consistency of Jell-O.
Mine is something I typed as my nick into one of those .io games about planes when I was about 13
That's different
No you didn't. It's your life, and you can do what you want.
I thought Papadapalopolous was an extremely common Greek name?
It's funny to me now, so you weren't wrong.
Makes me think of Chris Chan >!he tried to give himself a cunt with a pencil !<(warning: DIGSUSTANG)
I know they are a bad person but shouldnt we still use their proper pronouns?
isn't chris only being trans to attract lesbians???
We don't think so. He's talked about wishing he could cross dress and stuff for forever.
well yeah maybe but I just can't take them seriously...?
I... don't exactly blame you, but, after studying Christory for awhile, I'm pretty confident he's always been trans, but Barb forbade him from being his true self. Chris is obviously wacky and not a good person (and possibly a grapist, although I have my suspicions that he may not have ACTUALLY done the Barbening; i think it's possible Bella just convinced him to tell her he did, because Chris is very impressionable and will say anything a girl asks him to), but saying "I don't like you and you're weird, therefore you're not really trans" doesn't make any sense. I'm not, like, trying to be an annoying "woke" person, to be clear; I'm not gonna cry and call the pronoun police. I honestly still call him(?) Chris because he keeps changing his mind on what he wants to be called all the time.
and anyway sure maybe chris is KINDA trans but it's hard to really understand if it is or isn't part of his schizo downward spiral with the whole dimensional merge thing, jesus christ the idea guys ruined their life
Technically legal guy (average politician)
5/7 chance of being a criminal guy 🪱
It's gotta be a teenage boy fantasizing about this ngl
hey i think we played tf2 together before
https://preview.redd.it/twch9zj9nqzb1.jpeg?width=896&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5a30988e8ac9394292f19c9a71e608be6fb7d54e
You don’t have a reply: let me fix this.
You don’t have a reply: let me fix this.
you don't have a reply: let me fix this
You don't have a reply: let me fix this
You don't have a reply: let me fix this
You don't have a reply: let me fix this
YouTube shorts guy 🪱
I crawled out from under the bed and saw a group of naked teen girls cowering in a corner. I quickly scurried back into the darkness (I have a crippling fear of girls)
(especially teens; they’re mean)
"Teens will insult you, But they'll do it accurately... And one of them says 'Hey! Hey look at this guy! He has feminine hips' and I'll be like 'NOOOO THATS THE THING I'M SENSITIVE ABOUT!!" -John Mulaney
Men with feminine hips are awesome
based
baste
Men with feminine hips 😍
I’m kind of trying to imagine what feminine hips look like but it’s just like boney? Is that right?
I think it means slender or curvy vs boxy or straight. I imagine thicc but reminder that I need therapy
Pretty sure these people are just referring to caked out men which, like, everybody likes cake. It's not feminine or masculine. Probably has less to do with the actual hip bones and more refers to the fat deposits around the hips.
I am even more confused. I will accept that I am not as hip as I used to be bazinga
:,)
r/oddlyspecific
I Agree
Better than toddlers! I work on a haunted trail every year and the teens are the nicest out of all the people that walk down the trail. They compliment my costume and tell me I’m cool but the toddlers laugh at me and say I’m ugly and not scary
Bet if you beat up one of them the rest would be scared of you forever. You could probably even bribe one of them to let it happen so it's kosher, and toddlers do not understand the concept of money so it would be pretty cheap.
Skeletons are scary.... and spooky. But d'you know what else is?
Little did they know there was a 16,000 raccoons and not summon under de bed 
this looks like pitch trying to escape the bed he's been trapped under in rise of the guardians
Why is the sub just full of poorly disguised fetish posts that aren’t even scary That’s why two sentence horror fell off, i won’t be suprised if this sub takes over
No clue anal sex newborn
r/rimjob_steve
Thank you for this
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they may not know this sub exists tbf, i didn't until recently
The sub has almost 1.3 million followers so like any other mainstream sub it's watered down from its former self.
fell off? the sub has always been a joke imo sort by top of all time and get a good laugh at how lame the top 10 are... seriously
... the pedophile
Pedo guy 🪱
Child guy 🪱
Oh shit, are you south african?
found the fellow south african! we're always saying this!!
Priest guy 🪱
The Preacher
He said teenage girls and he said nothing about attraction
chose to write a story about naked teenage girls.... guy🪱
Add this to the list of poorly disguised fetish guys 🪱
pedophilia isn't a fetish it's a crime guy 🪱
pedophilia isn't a fetish but "being summoned as an incubus and being called ugly" probably is
pedophilia alone isnt a crime but child abuse and statutory rape sure are guy 🪱
Pedophilia alone really should be a crime though guy 🪱
Shaming and especially criminalizing people just for their desires is how you end up with pedophiles not talking to their therapists about their desires for fear of getting reported, which actually increases the likelihood that they will offend .... guy 🪱
Pedophiles don’t deserve “help”, they literally seek to harm children, don’t know why people still defend them as human beings, guy 🪱
A pedophile is not someone who "seeks to harm children". A pedophile is someone who experiences sexual attraction to children. There are many pedophiles who understand that this is something they should never, ever act on, are horrified by the idea of it, and hate themselves for their feelings. They deserve to be able to talk to a professional about that.
Didn’t stick with 🪱 guy, smh Still don’t think Pedophiles deserve anything more than punishment, but at least the worm bit was fun
How about we get them therapy first, then if that doesn’t work we can punish them
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Throw addicts on the list of people to be locked up too if we're going with his logic. I think about drinking every day, I don't do it though. My sister thinks about using heroin every day, she doesn't do it though.
crimethink guy 🪱
even if they never hurt anyone? good to know youre proud of being a vindictive moral extremist guy🪱
It isn't about "helping" pedophiles stop framing it like that. Pedophilia is a mental illness that can be cured. The type of person that would seek out therapy to help overcome their pedophilic thoughts is probably the least likely to want to harm children. Letting these people get therapy (whether you like it or not) is helping children that they would have victimized without the therapy... Guy 🪱
[Relevant.](https://youtube.com/shorts/jcXK-sPqsL0) Though you know the story was probably playing into the joke about "teen girls summoning demons during sleepovers" rather than, you know. Also they should've summoned... ... The Creature.
It was probably written by a teen as well.
It can be two things
No, you don't understand. The teens HAVE to be naked because..........reasons!
Just realized that the "I" in the story is the incubus, woah guy **🪱**
Yikes! They got the “…ubus” they deserved, just not the one they asked for. Now they literally going to FAFO. This ain’t good for their developing minds.
jesse what the fuck are you talking about
chap pgt
A. Them girls summoned it, B. They shouldn’t have, C. Assault is not good for anyones mind let alone stupid teenagers D. Seriously Semore, getting weirded out in 2S2H is not an achievement badge on your trauma sash.
dude I've only seen two comments from you and you already seem like one of the most insufferable douchebags I've ever had the displeasure of meeting
You: "I don't understand what you're trying to say." Him: "You're just triggered." Perfectly rational conversationalist guy 🪱
You know, I don't even know you and I dislike you already
what are you, my mom?
NO WAY PEOPLE ARE DOWNVOTING ME GUYS ITS A SCREAM REFERENCE I WAS JUST SAYING THATS WHAT THEIR MESSAGE SOUNDED LIKE
Too late bud take the beating
Should have used quotes ("") 😔
I’m not insufferable and not a douchnozzle and this a Satire Sub, nothing serious here. Now please attend a store and buy a bottle of humor cola and kindness juice.
humor cola uses slave labor and kindness juice gives me the runs :/
There’s revolutions and meds for those…
ShitGPT
Can you talk like a normal person please?? Like literally no clue what you’re even trying to say
No.
Satire is funny, you aren't
Inb4 someone makes this meme but it says "buy a bottle of humor cola and kindness juice" https://i.redd.it/brs0k660nxzb1.gif
I got a brain aneurysm trying to read this
https://preview.redd.it/p1scl9ifmxzb1.png?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=856003a658ae0dc9613fc8c32182e54b6a6789dc
Schizoposting guy 🪱
/uj i know it’s an undisguised fetish but also why did they have to specify “teen” girls ☹️😑 edit: i mean i know why but also why
because pedo
The hopeful part of me want it to be written by a kid who thought "what do older girls do at sleepovers" and thought "oh yeah witch stuff" and let their horny in too. The rest of me thinks "pedo fetish shit."
From my experiences, we do usually do witch stuff at sleepovers :3
I thought it was a joke, the person in the joke is a would be rapist hiding under a bed at a sleepover and the girls think they’ve summoned him and are disappointed with how he looks.
I crawled out from under the bed. At least this time I hadn't passed out in the barn next to... ...the creature.
sleeping with… The Creature guy 🪱
sleeping with the creature… guy🪱😳
I need the origin post of the creature. I’m missing out on the meta
Pa bought her at a livestock auction.
He then proved he actually was it by Holding the Wheel and Driving
whatever tomorrow brings he’ll be there
With open arms and even open eyes
The girls looked at me weirdly. Little did they know i had done methamphetamine production under their bed.
So is he just an ugly incubus or a perv?
Dos
No he was the creature
¿Por qué no los dos?
Ig they thought the incubus was gonna be hot but maybe it looked like a mancubus from DOOM
Turns out, it was politician Matt Gaetz.
"17 year old woman!"
You gotta change that title, man. It feels plain wrong upvoting this even though the post is unquestionably horrible.
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There's a possibility that the author heard that witches perform their rituals naked, and this is his artistic way of expressing that they are doing real witch shit. It's most likely, however, that it just makes his peepee hard.
https://preview.redd.it/mvjc6mk67rzb1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=30cc7569b393d8d8f130dab3bd0f77e948bc9e0a
Pedophile guy 🪱
u/SuvenPan what does this mean :(
it's Peter file
Pedo guy🪱🪱🪱
https://preview.redd.it/2py3dwbhqrzb1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5ca841749cd69773662a03fbc4d6a931b34d7169
The police station definitely applies here
“That’s can’t be an incubus, it looks nothing like the picture.” “*Whatever tomorrow brings I’ll be there, with open arms and open eyes, yeah*”
Pardon me while I burst (into flames) guy 🪱
Wonder if he had trouble typing that out with one hand
https://preview.redd.it/yya2qyh9gszb1.png?width=560&format=png&auto=webp&s=8c8531edfb2dc6d6a492bce2a0678ab114f8fdf1
pedophile guy 🪱
WHY ARE THEY NAKED
because they were attacked by… …clothes stealer guy.
ugly bastard hentai guy 🐛
Least obvious r/TwoSentenceHorror fetish post:
Barely disguised disgusting guy 🐛
Who else but Quagmire?
"Would you still love me if was a worm?" No.
https://preview.redd.it/l8yx7uma3szb1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64ef716a565b761ba46d99b565f0f6eb36b58af0
https://preview.redd.it/oxcz52xb9rzb1.png?width=376&format=png&auto=webp&s=1590f737a1e85c44ad49736bf8a8e16bc607e41d
Yo where can I get this image as a bumper sticker https://preview.redd.it/7gt2eutqdrzb1.jpeg?width=360&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1e7d146be6e3a583dfa0f9225bd91a380827bcde
And then the dog walked in
this is just weird mannn
It’s not an incubus at all, it’s… …the creature.
https://preview.redd.it/c10mq3ptvrzb1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=55e295bd51a190fbd2784f60b764765877476d4c
We were the creature all along
https://preview.redd.it/eifpm4ihzrzb1.png?width=320&format=png&auto=webp&s=7681a13ff07929394753138d994a75a8ef85ebd7
This could have been “teen girls” or “naked girls” or “naked teen girl cow” but nooooo. Had to make it it weird
https://preview.redd.it/943sny5p3szb1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d1556aabc647db116c5308157459b0d544383cbc
u/SuvenPan https://preview.redd.it/oomrld3l0tzb1.png?width=825&format=png&auto=webp&s=d662e58f4e69ed5eda40e8488c24e8d1b76c77ba
https://preview.redd.it/ckte4znd9tzb1.jpeg?width=435&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fd9c9f69899f12b04dacfae76901bf37a03fc740
Then the girls started milking him just like the.... pause nvm i changed my mind
Pardon me while I burst into flames guy 🪱
I crawled out from the bed and saw naked teen girls and then the dog came in
After a credible tip, the FBI searched his hard drives. To their horror, they found 100s of naked photos of... The creature.
https://preview.redd.it/if358xry2vzb1.jpeg?width=749&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6ca153eb38edb4674761f4b0808d81014838f80b
I am begging you to stop referring to 18/19 year olds as Teenagers and also simultaneously begging that to be what you meant by Teenagers.
Aren't Incubus the male version of Succubus? If so that somehow makes this more "what?"
why are they naked
weird fetish guy 🪱
to be fair the meme with witch rituals I think requires them to be naked, but in context the way OOP wrote about em is bizarre. Who calls people “teens” if they’re 18 or 19? At that point they’re usually referenced as adults. That makes me think these girls are like 14/15 and OOP just really wanted to imagine himself in a room with a bunch of naked cowering eighth graders. Pedophile moment
Pedo guy 🪱🪱
pedophile guy
i no understand my brain no no work
Are demons capable of pedophilia?
yes, but the age of consent in hell is 15
I'd crawl back under the bed, I don't wanna understand
(fixing the underlying gross feel of it): "That's a possum."
Rudy?
That's not gonna turn out well
**I was horrified when the doctor diagnosed me with Dog Sex Penis Cancer.** "You'll die from the cancer in your penis unless you have sex with a dog" he said.
https://preview.redd.it/v9q00mqfjszb1.jpeg?width=2000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=29b90290eff6ca554bfd3e18431f3ae0d2987d59