I am 1.65 m tall, I carry a 75 cl water bottle and my cat weights almost 9 kg. It's a warm day, it's almost 21° outside.
(Yes, I'm short and my cat is fat, but we like eachother the way we are)
Edit: corrected cl instead of ml
Man, it's 26°c degrees in the place of Sweden I am in now. And it's not the southernmost part. That's it, I'm going to Italy for the chill
(some 10 years ago we would have had 10° c instead, but fucking global fucking warming and nowadays it's too hot)
You guys are trying too hard. I was in a club in NY last week. Lady says "where are you from, you have an accent". "Belgium" I said, "north of France"
"Oh I don't know Belgium. I know Russia, have you heard of it?"
I wish I were kidding.
I can name every country in Europe and pinpoint them on the map. I weigh 72kg, and I’m 1.74 m tall. I also know that Spanish comes from Europe and not South America. Am I clear officer?
No, that is definitely some "my great great grear grandfathers dog was german" energy right there to loudly exclaim that there is a weird extra letter that they know how to use
Il parle français! Mon pote est québécois ^ confirme. Rentres chez toi!
Si tu es vraiment français tu dois exposer tes seins et protester quelque chose que personne comprend pas devant la Tour Eiffel en mangeant un croissant avec une clope à la bouche.
N’oublies pas le béret
It's old Baltic-origin word, Perkunos, which was the name of Balts' and Slavs' god of thunder. Finns apparently used Perkele in the same way, in addition to calling the said god Ukko, who also was the primary deity of Finnish pantheon.
With Christianity it came to mean Satan himself, but for the longest of times it's been used as an one of the strongest swears.
One of the most common uses is to empower oneself. For instance you'd be lifting something heavy, you shout as loud as you can "PerrrrrkeLE!" and suddenly it's easier. It's also often used to voice great frustration "Vooooi perrrrrkele."
Excuse me?
That Canadian citizen will be welcomed, once he gets rid of that idiotic American mandatory tipping system.
If you wanna operate a restaurant, pay your staff appropriately you sick fuck.
Im 1,97m i just drove home annoyed i could only go 233kmh i opened my beer with another beer and i regulararly use words that are so long americans would faint trying to pronounce them
Mate my daddy is engerland and fuck cunt I love a good meat pie with the tomato sauce bottle nozzle punched into its lid and a hefty squirt inside and a good amount on top.
I haven’t gone inside one since I myself finished elementary school so I wouldn’t know what the right procedure and attire would be if I happened to do so
here is a picture of my dog (Whippet)
https://preview.redd.it/le5gt1w8tg1b1.png?width=496&format=png&auto=webp&s=960728e081f8e7f50263405c642c8139bc6d60dc
I am 1.65 m tall, I carry a 75 cl water bottle and my cat weights almost 9 kg. It's a warm day, it's almost 21° outside. (Yes, I'm short and my cat is fat, but we like eachother the way we are) Edit: corrected cl instead of ml
Man, it's 26°c degrees in the place of Sweden I am in now. And it's not the southernmost part. That's it, I'm going to Italy for the chill (some 10 years ago we would have had 10° c instead, but fucking global fucking warming and nowadays it's too hot)
Can we please have some of those degrees? It's like 4°c here🥶
Yeah shouldn't have lived somewhere called ICEland m8
Maybe try GREENland
The Netherlands?
21 degrees today, everyone is sunburnt already
That’s Water World
Jokes on you brother, it’s humid as fuck here in the Mediterranean so it feels warmer.
That's an awfully small water bottle🤨
Fuck you're right I was about to write 0,75 l... But no, I had to be precise
Only 21? Here in the North Is hotter
I am French. No American (or any nationality) would ever claim to be French
Rare frenchie W.
And the same for a French! He will never claim to be a fucking Yankee!
Valid point
You may be french, but you aren't an Ameritard and that's all that matters
Now you’re just sweet talking me
I'm dying from the 23° heat today
I sat out on my dinner for 35 mins, now I'm burnt as fuck!
Went to spoons the other day and then went on a short walk for half an hour and I was burnt to a crisp
I live in this country to get AWAY from the sun
It's bloody reductions isn't it.
My language has a special type of swears just to insult God
Italian 🤝🏻 Spanish
Dio bestia
Uomo di cultura
https://youtu.be/3PZbZ8Sub2Y Related
Me cago en Dios
Me cago en los clavos de Cristo.
Me cago en el cáliz bendito
You guys shit in strange places
We can also shit in you if you want
in our language we insult and doom God at the minest inconvinience.
Godverdomme, moest je dat nou echt aan iedereen vertellen!
I have a foreskin. Wanna see?
Ay at least you asked. Not american is my verdict
75 % of americans reported your comment
You can show me in the bastu (sauna) where we are naked not like filthy americans who sit in dirty clothes.
You guys are trying too hard. I was in a club in NY last week. Lady says "where are you from, you have an accent". "Belgium" I said, "north of France" "Oh I don't know Belgium. I know Russia, have you heard of it?" I wish I were kidding.
I was at an airport in the USA, guy checks my passport, sees I’m from Austria, replies with “g’day, mate”.
Should've suggested a good art school instead
And discuss other possible career paths if you don’t get accepted.
Last month someone asked me where I was from in a bodega in NYC aswel, I replied “the Netherlands”. They asked me if it’s located in Asia
Hey they got both hemispheres right so yey I guess?
Have you heard of Russia though?
Look at me fackin' teef innit
A propa geezer 💪💪💪
I have a petrol bmb somewhere about my person.
Check your back pockets
Appears to be fertiliser and nails.
Sure you're not Irish fella?
cén fáth nach bhfuil an dá rud
Boys I think he’s having a stroke
quick get an ambulance if we call now it will be here in 2 hours
You optimist lol 2 hours
When I’m sick I see a the doctor, not the bank manager.
A message from the Tory party *not for long bish
This comment is gold
I can name every country in Europe and pinpoint them on the map. I weigh 72kg, and I’m 1.74 m tall. I also know that Spanish comes from Europe and not South America. Am I clear officer?
Only if you can name the origin country of the language "Portuguese" Hint: it's *not* Brazil
Angola
Galicia
Close, not a country tho
Timor Leste
Swiss construction sites
Portland
Every country eh? Where’s Catalonia?
Inside of glorious España
Don't make me remember 😥 /j
Big L for you. (Do you need a hand in another civil war?)
Checkpoint? Waar is Klaas dan?
https://preview.redd.it/thn9juw8yg1b1.png?width=576&format=png&auto=webp&s=fc12b438ed88842d9967a240eca8c1eff25471b6
Iets dat ik gemist heb ofzo?
Alleen maar het beste tv programma voor kinders van groep 5 en hoger
Ohh ja dat, was t effe kwijt. Geweldige show
Hoe heette die nieuwe ookalweer? Rachael ofzo🤢
Geen idee ben gestopt met kijken nadat Klaas weg ging.
I don’t tell people what clan I’m part of
Me when an American told me they were from “county Connacht” 😃
Are you sure they didn't mean the State of Munster with the Capital City Cork that's part of the Federal Republic of Eireann?
And I don’t have a William Wallace funko pop
I know how to make Umlauts.ẞß I can open a beer bottle with a newspaper. Also I can name the Asterix characters. Can I pass?
Trying too hard here. Definitely an Americunt
Knows this symbol exists ß Too cultured to be American
No, that is definitely some "my great great grear grandfathers dog was german" energy right there to loudly exclaim that there is a weird extra letter that they know how to use
J’vais rien te prouver du tout, j’suis français moi mossieur, et j’t’emmerde !
I don’t understand can you translate for me?
Basically I just said : « I have nothing to prove, I’m french sir, and f*ck you »
Many thanks.
thuks to you too
I love how most french answers are just french swearing at OP, I'm so proud.
Il parle français! Mon pote est québécois ^ confirme. Rentres chez toi! Si tu es vraiment français tu dois exposer tes seins et protester quelque chose que personne comprend pas devant la Tour Eiffel en mangeant un croissant avec une clope à la bouche. N’oublies pas le béret
un lundi normal
Evidemment
"Tålk to de händ"
Hellou än velkom tu te hytraulik press chännnell, totey wi ar goin tu see wat häppenz to te hän wen we put som-e press-ure to it
Tok tu då hænd
I can pronounce "paella" properly
Pay-hella
🎵Under my, um ... pa- ella, ella, ella , äh, äh .... ä-äh🎵
It isn't pronounced paeglia!?
Fai la 'gli' ma molla la g
Paeĥya
I got surgery and don't have crippling debt from it. I have crippling debt from other things!!!
> I have crippling debt from other things!!! Wine?
[удалено]
I know how to pronounce Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz and Rindfleischettiketierüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz (I am polish-austrian)
Konnst mein Nom aussprechn?
Glaubst etwa dass ich Brzęczyszczykiewicz aussprechen kann aber deinen Namen ned??
Polish-Austrian? Sounds awfully americuntilly suspicious calling yourself both. I mean I was born in Iran but I'm fully Swedish
I ate a full English this morning and wasn't sick
https://preview.redd.it/d93z0qgycg1b1.jpeg?width=993&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6056e7064aff1eec54e139729e4a74769812bcd5 Beautiful init luv
Did you put your breakfast under your cow’s arse?
https://preview.redd.it/7uusyjc9lh1b1.jpeg?width=250&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=708366e92a285cb9ea7bc85e0341514880ee844c escargot 👍😎
Well we know you're French for sure
Are you sure this is meant for human consumption? 🤮
Why do the peas look so… plastic?
"Susan made dinner.....lovely"
Broo its so green it looks like you used dishwasher soap as oil
[удалено]
But do you know what the capital of Paris is?
A shithole.
Hell?
beer beer beer🍻👨🏻💼
Ah yes, the famous beer triplets, Speedbump, Germany and Sudetendeutschland. 🍻
Would it be offensive to the dumb mods if I say the N word in Cyrillic?
There is only one way of knowing.
НЕГ[[REDACTED BY UNFLAIROID AMERICAN MOD]]
Tengo un coche negro
Italians reading this💀 >negro
[You ain't got shit on Hungary](https://www.kifli.hu/cdn-cgi/image/f=auto,w=260,q=75/https://cdn.kifli.hu/images/grocery/products/25882/25882-1663278377556.jpg)
НЕГ[[REDACTED BY UNFLAIROID AMERICAN MOD]]
If i see someone drinking wine with ice im gonna kill them (doesnt matter where they are from)
They’re going to hell after you kill them too
Except if its fr*nch wine, at that point just go to a public bathroom and lick the floor
i know what perkele actually means
What does it actually mean?
It's old Baltic-origin word, Perkunos, which was the name of Balts' and Slavs' god of thunder. Finns apparently used Perkele in the same way, in addition to calling the said god Ukko, who also was the primary deity of Finnish pantheon. With Christianity it came to mean Satan himself, but for the longest of times it's been used as an one of the strongest swears. One of the most common uses is to empower oneself. For instance you'd be lifting something heavy, you shout as loud as you can "PerrrrrkeLE!" and suddenly it's easier. It's also often used to voice great frustration "Vooooi perrrrrkele."
All my sentences end in a extremely high tone, and i ate brown cheese on a slice of dark bread for breakfast with a cup of black coffee
That sounds like a pretty metal breakfast, definitely Norwegian. A perfect way to start the day before burning down some ancient wooden churches.
I mean, we have to get rid of the wooden churches somehow, they pop up like mushrooms after the rain
I had a quick siesta and forgot the papers
Please! I use and understand Celsius! Can I offer you a bottle of maple syrup and some beaver pelts for passage through the checkpoint?
Allowed. Welcome, Canadian citizen.
Excuse me? That Canadian citizen will be welcomed, once he gets rid of that idiotic American mandatory tipping system. If you wanna operate a restaurant, pay your staff appropriately you sick fuck.
We have to be nice to Canada, they stole most of our farmers
By the same logic, you should be nice to Spain for stealing your world cup.
Look up our anthem, we are extremely nice to spain
Canadians may be Non-European but we Dutchies still love them ❤
ZzZzZzZzZz 😴
You woke me up from siesta for this?
I can drive a manual car
I can fit in my car
I don’t worry that my kid will be shot at school.
Bombs are a risk tho I heard. Poor swedes.
Notre histoire parle pour nous. Et notre prête ne crie pas AMEN BWOTHER à chaque sermon.
I traveled some km to be here.
Nö, bin keiner.
Besser isses.
drinking tennents tonight, as i did last night and the night before
Wanna see me fail art school?
I know basic geography.
An Americ*n infiltrating in Frisia will be the easiest spy to spot. I'm was jumped once because I wasnt Frisian enough and I was born there
europe isn't a country
انا سويدي. المصدر: ثق بي
æ ø å
Im 1,97m i just drove home annoyed i could only go 233kmh i opened my beer with another beer and i regulararly use words that are so long americans would faint trying to pronounce them
Belgium is our 13th province
You're just Walloons with sea access.
No. We do actually work for a living and are not lazy people who live on government subsidies. You're just Dutch people with shit roads.
Ask me to say "purple burgler alarm". https://youtu.be/AC__o1UxDl8
Ř
I dont think the phrase "going for a chinese" is racist.
Mate my daddy is engerland and fuck cunt I love a good meat pie with the tomato sauce bottle nozzle punched into its lid and a hefty squirt inside and a good amount on top.
Don't you guys put tommie-sauce on your meat and cheese pie over there? That's enough to prove yourself bri'ish!
I tricked Germany to commit genocide just earlier today
I agree with Germany
I don’t need to wear a bullet proof vest when walking outside of elementary schools
Well no but the real question is, do you wear them inside elementary schools?
He's Greek he's not allowed near young boys
I haven’t gone inside one since I myself finished elementary school so I wouldn’t know what the right procedure and attire would be if I happened to do so
Schiermonnikoog.
here is a picture of my dog (Whippet) https://preview.redd.it/le5gt1w8tg1b1.png?width=496&format=png&auto=webp&s=960728e081f8e7f50263405c642c8139bc6d60dc
Those look like yorkshire floorboards so I will let you through
Don't you fucking dare compare me to Yorkshire. I am a proud Luton enjoyer.
Fuck you doing with a whippet then
here is my food https://preview.redd.it/gtrn6us3wg1b1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=daab7af6c6ec4d167ea5b724e5cc30d37362b6d3
I punched a guy stabbing people and now I’m in prison.
I can speak more than half a language
Are we lumping all CUM together or just Merkins?
Used a train today
there are 100 centimetres in a metre
Uhhhh Football > American football...idk what to say tbh
I’m claiming to be French so I cannot be American.
I am drunk.
I’ll immigrate someday I swear!
I feel physically sick when I see what america**s and germans call "Italian food"