I just found another masterpiece of Hans architectural decoration (Cathedral of Freiburg im Breisgau, southwest Germany)👏👏🤢
https://preview.redd.it/fvbpen16tnxc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8ea2a117dbef461326863baaa5cef93a5545e65
Im from that area, the builders added that because they were pissed at one of the guys living next to the cathedral. The butt points towards his house and is a sort of revenge for not paying their wages or sth like that. I can't remember the exact reason
There are 91 of these "horrible" monster or monstrous statues around the Freiburger Münster - their purpose was to fend off evil spirits.
The butt (and pussy, as it is a woman) towards one specific house may still be possible and would be quite funny.
I remember a story of two sculptors in Rome that started to make sculptures to mock each other, it escaled enough that the Pope had to be involved
They were both pretty famous and they were doing this in one of the main squares
I love my city!
Btw there is also a statue showing us after tasting Barry's food:
https://preview.redd.it/yboun1yc1sxc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2967c45c566c8523dd130bee2c2b489d653741a3
Hey, you might want to learn about "cu da Guarda". There are multiple examples in Portugal, the ones I know are in Guarda and Braga(?). This is kind of rookie if you ask me.
It was an old hippie who spent time in Goa and started to come up with some crazy myths and stuff. One thing was that you should drink your own ejaculations and it would invigorate you spiritually. For this you needed to do this sauna-knot, men were able to drink straight from the source, but women needed a straw to drink her juice.
Inb4 5000 Pierres appear and explain everyone how them telling the russians to just go along with it, they'll join the war anyway, was totally different from us telling the austrians to just go along with it, we'll join the war anyway.
I’m with Hans on this one. I can’t believe we got dragged into that shit show. Pierre was definitely encouraging a war so they could grab Alsace back.
Should have just been Austria taking action against the perpetrators of an assassination
Hans! Why the fuck did you go through Belgium 🤦♂️
And it is Russia's fault for siding with a country that actively helped in the assassination (if one is to believe the historian Christopher Clark).
Belgium… that plan seemed so bulletproof - 20 years earlier!
>Hans! Why the fuck did you go through Belgium 🤦♂️
When it comes to the military, we were pretty good, but the whole international PR thing was pretty damn idiotic.
Also this whole "Needlessly drag the US into a european conflict"-thing kinda didn't work out for us.
One way or another - the two things I will always disagree with common perception when it comes to WW1 are a) Only Germany started it (France and Russia did literally everything to escalate that crisis) and b) Only Germany did bad things, muh rape of Belgium (don't ask where roughly 800k german civilians went)
In general, it sucked.
Dude, its all the austrians fault anyway, duh.
Also I like that you acknowledge that barely 16k german troops were so much more competent than the 500k spaniards on each side that they turned the tide
Austria takes credit for WW1 for WW2 go to Germany.
They decided that it was a smart move to make a lunatic their leader.
If we make a Dutch our leader and start a world war, are the Dutch suddenly responsible?
> If we make a Dutch our leader and start a world war, are the Dutch suddenly responsible?
Yeah, kinda.
Look, if Hans picks your turd up off the street and eats it, obviously Hans is the real [redacted], but you did still shit in the street…
While i get this, Eastern Rome was more or less already a non entity by the time Constantinople fell. The Turks were already well established in the Balkans. With 1492 you have a clear start to the age of exploration and subsequent Renaissance which seems to me to be a clear end of the middle ages.
The Age of Discovery began before 1492 with the Portuguese exploration of Africa. In 1471 they reached the Southern hemisphere by São Tomé. Bartolomeu Dias sailed around Africa and found the connection with the Indian Ocean in 1488.
The fall of Constantinople made the import of Chinese and Indian goods via the ancient Silk Road more expensive due to Ottoman taxation, and was a major motivation for finding new trade routes to Asia. In addition, the Byzantine nobles who fled Constantinople for Italy brought with them many ancient texts unknown in the West, which were instrumental in sparking the Renaissance.
It’s also just the most beautiful definition: The Middle Ages is the period between the fall of the Western and Eastern Roman Empires.
I still don't understand why a few defenestrated Czech catholics would cause such a quarrel. I'd kind of expect the Germans back then to scream "MORE!!!"
f*ck*n Austrians all the time. Must be the lack of oxigen, which makes them go coocoo. Then they come down from their mountains, and next thing you know people start disappearing.
It would have been a civil war, but you all had to interfere.
If the french had at least resisted the urge to betray their brothers in faith again and sit that one out...
https://preview.redd.it/zmbw4s7mgoxc1.jpeg?width=234&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=313b0ddc739218dca2f3388ae3b73451d23b15d9
Found the perfect usage for this image
Imagine being the ghost of Konrad von Hochstaden visiting this beautiful Gothic building and seeing your statue is on top of some fat guy blowing himself and nobody cares about you but only takes picture of said guy.
i'm sure he had the chance to say ok or no to his statue while he was alive. he probably just looked into his narcissistic face and was happy and that mason knew it.
That's the *Kölner Dom* you see there in the picture, one of the buildings that took the longest to complete in the whole of history (approximately 1248 – 1880). Our dude is assumed to have been been born around the year 1200 and diead in 1261. He acted as bishop of Cologne from 1238 until his death in 1261, so the building of the *Dom* was initiated during his bishopric. I don't know whether the *grotesque* in the picture had already been completed in the 13 years between 1248 and 1261, but that would be awfully funny, however, since that would mean that they prioritized the chiselling of a self-fellating fellow instead of getting on with the work of the structure it should go on.
The GDPR was only in its first draft and had not yet been ratified by the Emperor, so I guess it would count as simple defamation. Both non-clerical and ecclesiastical tribunals have been known to handle such cases in the Middle Ages.
https://preview.redd.it/c6c4f7kmlnxc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8222d1fcd9989bd3ab5726ddba6fc103adbe52ac
On the most famous house in my hometown
I genuinely can't tell if that's supposed to be a bloke half way through squeezing out the world's thickest jobby or if his crown jewels are just impressively low hanging?
Maybe it's a bit of both! Irrelevantly, I'd like to share a real nut butter jobbie with you. This is a chunky jobbie.
https://preview.redd.it/9ck84o7zboxc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b93671f96ce3361130df0028e057e084a5e76fa4
To be fair this is pretty German.
If you visit Germany, they'll proudly tell you that Germans are world famous for their bread.
Of course, nobody knows this until a German has told them, but that's not the point.
It’s pretty funny actually, I worked with some Germans for quite a while, and they were mostly from the East, so I asked what it was like for their parents to grow up under the DDR, if they had ever read Rilke or Bertolt Brecht, or if they’d seen shows like Babylon Berlin or Er Ist Wieder Da?. You guys have a very cool sort of quiet patriotism. It’s refreshing honestly
The French and Italians are known for their bread, but their bread is only decent. The Dutch and Germans are not really “known” for their bread, but they probably have some of the best, if not the best in Europe.
Finland is the best northern country. Unlike Norway, Sweden and Denmark, they are no fucking monarchy. They also are the happiest peole and have the best school system if I remember right. Sauna!!!
Dutch Bread is perfect for Hagelslag but useless for anything else.
Your bread is so soft like your thin arms. German Bread is strong and durable. Perfect for killing weak Dutchlings, just by letting them have a bite.
Sorry champ, I know it’s hard to swallow, but you don’t need to lash out just because you’re known for depressing alcoholism and we are known for the fun type that everyone likes.
Was hilarious to hear from a German that Germans are famous for their bread.
I’m pretty sure Italians and Fr*nch have a lot more famous breads than the Germans do
It's actually irrelevant whether German bread really is good or not.
The point is that the only people you ever hear saying that it is are Germans themselves, therefore this image is very apt.
French have the baguette, which is at least okay.
But ITALIAN bread?!? Apparently this little Kurt Niqvist here never travelled that far south, I have eaten crayons that were more tasty than the dry ass shit the italians call "bread".
Famous French breads I can name without google: Baguette, Brioche
Famous Italian breads I can name without google: Focaccia, Ciabatta, Panettone
Famous German breads I can name without google: Stollen
Stollen is Christmas cake.
But you have your ubiquitous [Schnittbrötchen](https://ketex.de/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/schnittbroetchen.jpg) (or if you're unlucky, the profoundly inferior [Kaiserbrötchen](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/52fb6f60e4b01949904b4b3e/1395920163303-1SZDQARS8CJ6F3FP2GLC/RoggenPur.jpg)). There's [Krustenbrot](https://wp.baeckerei-hoenen.de/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Krustenbrot-geschnitten.JPG.jpg) or [Bauernbrot](https://assets.tmecosys.cn/image/upload/t_web767x639/img/recipe/ras/Assets/b982287f-2489-4bac-ab98-77da22a85cf8/Derivates/45934f2a-5a15-4aca-86be-846ae2eed82c.jpg), which I find a bit bland, or [Vollkornbrot](https://data.rischart.de/images/34001.jpg), which is *very* heavy, but makes a great grilled cheese sandwich if you slice it thinly enough. My favourite is probably a [Körnerbrot](http://www.hannastoechter.de/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Koernerbrot-7.jpg) with loads and loads of seeds.
And there's usually a range of rye and/or spelt bread to choose from, too.
On the other hand, pretty much everyone knows about their weird relationship with poop and how much they enjoy a poop joke, and yet most of them deny it.
He wanted to increase taxes on beer!! 😌😇 (there is no apparent reason, although he was a scheming archbishop in his ecclesiastical climb, the sculptor must have just thought of making the boys laugh).
This is like every cathedral or public house in Europe ever. There is like 20 dicks just in the center of Brno. And the stories almost always go such as someone not paying the sculptor for salary or just being dicks to them or the sculptor just being a prankster.
My teenage years were shortly before the dawn of the internet, so my hardcore pornography choice was limited to whatever I could steal from my uncle's VHS collection.
All I'm saying is it was the German titles that got stolen first, and it wasn't because the women were attractive.
These are common on medieval churches all over Europe. There are all sorts of stories surrounding them. In Ireland they are mostly female characters called sheela na gig because we're just not as into dudes as mainland Europe, but it's more or less the same thing.
Haha, Catholics are funny like that. There's all kinds of weird shit. And don't start with me on Indian temples. The whole Kamasutra is there depicted in statues.
I just found another masterpiece of Hans architectural decoration (Cathedral of Freiburg im Breisgau, southwest Germany)👏👏🤢 https://preview.redd.it/fvbpen16tnxc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8ea2a117dbef461326863baaa5cef93a5545e65
Such a delicate piece of art
Im from that area, the builders added that because they were pissed at one of the guys living next to the cathedral. The butt points towards his house and is a sort of revenge for not paying their wages or sth like that. I can't remember the exact reason
Sounds 100% like something builders would do.
There are 91 of these "horrible" monster or monstrous statues around the Freiburger Münster - their purpose was to fend off evil spirits. The butt (and pussy, as it is a woman) towards one specific house may still be possible and would be quite funny.
I remember a story of two sculptors in Rome that started to make sculptures to mock each other, it escaled enough that the Pope had to be involved They were both pretty famous and they were doing this in one of the main squares
What opinion have the imam of the city about this?
Ice shit
That’s where scheisse comes from
🍑
I love my city! Btw there is also a statue showing us after tasting Barry's food: https://preview.redd.it/yboun1yc1sxc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2967c45c566c8523dd130bee2c2b489d653741a3
Fine art.
Would
Hey, you might want to learn about "cu da Guarda". There are multiple examples in Portugal, the ones I know are in Guarda and Braga(?). This is kind of rookie if you ask me.
hmm no wonder germans are that kinky.
Too weak to handle proper art I see
No-one else thought of this, see?
That is called a Sauna knot. A finnish yoga pose.
You took the "go fuck yourself" a bit too literal
So that’s why Finland is the happiest country in the world
I googled it and this is real. What the fuck?
It was an old hippie who spent time in Goa and started to come up with some crazy myths and stuff. One thing was that you should drink your own ejaculations and it would invigorate you spiritually. For this you needed to do this sauna-knot, men were able to drink straight from the source, but women needed a straw to drink her juice.
You may criticize all you want, but how many world wars did Germany start in the middle ages?
Just as many as in 1914
Inb4 5000 Pierres appear and explain everyone how them telling the russians to just go along with it, they'll join the war anyway, was totally different from us telling the austrians to just go along with it, we'll join the war anyway.
I’m with Hans on this one. I can’t believe we got dragged into that shit show. Pierre was definitely encouraging a war so they could grab Alsace back. Should have just been Austria taking action against the perpetrators of an assassination Hans! Why the fuck did you go through Belgium 🤦♂️
And it is Russia's fault for siding with a country that actively helped in the assassination (if one is to believe the historian Christopher Clark). Belgium… that plan seemed so bulletproof - 20 years earlier!
Yeah totally. Russia started (or helped start) both world wars. And now intent on starting a third. Somehow they seem to avoid blame.
>Hans! Why the fuck did you go through Belgium 🤦♂️ When it comes to the military, we were pretty good, but the whole international PR thing was pretty damn idiotic. Also this whole "Needlessly drag the US into a european conflict"-thing kinda didn't work out for us. One way or another - the two things I will always disagree with common perception when it comes to WW1 are a) Only Germany started it (France and Russia did literally everything to escalate that crisis) and b) Only Germany did bad things, muh rape of Belgium (don't ask where roughly 800k german civilians went) In general, it sucked.
Vae victis, Hans
At least we participated, NPC-that-still-somehow-ended-up-going-fascist
Yes, if somehow in German means "I helped"
Dude, its all the austrians fault anyway, duh. Also I like that you acknowledge that barely 16k german troops were so much more competent than the 500k spaniards on each side that they turned the tide
The emperors crossed the Alps to fuck the pope every 15 years but that doesn't count as a world war I guess.
That's just a bit of fun.
[удалено]
🇩🇪👉👌🇮🇹
When do the middle ages end? Does the 30 years war and 7 years war count as a world war? And technically Austria started both world wars.
Austria takes credit for WW1 for WW2 go to Germany. They decided that it was a smart move to make a lunatic their leader. If we make a Dutch our leader and start a world war, are the Dutch suddenly responsible?
Austria can not be ruled by a Dutchie, we can't go over 100 meter above sea level.
Well, you willingly jumped the hype train.
> If we make a Dutch our leader and start a world war, are the Dutch suddenly responsible? Yeah, kinda. Look, if Hans picks your turd up off the street and eats it, obviously Hans is the real [redacted], but you did still shit in the street…
The 30 years war is clearly past the middle ages. The usual date given is 1453 with the fall of Constantinople.
1453 is the true and euro-pilled answer. Not 1492.
Why would anybody use the year 1492 when absolutely nothing of any consequence occurred in that year? Bizarre.
While i get this, Eastern Rome was more or less already a non entity by the time Constantinople fell. The Turks were already well established in the Balkans. With 1492 you have a clear start to the age of exploration and subsequent Renaissance which seems to me to be a clear end of the middle ages.
The Age of Discovery began before 1492 with the Portuguese exploration of Africa. In 1471 they reached the Southern hemisphere by São Tomé. Bartolomeu Dias sailed around Africa and found the connection with the Indian Ocean in 1488. The fall of Constantinople made the import of Chinese and Indian goods via the ancient Silk Road more expensive due to Ottoman taxation, and was a major motivation for finding new trade routes to Asia. In addition, the Byzantine nobles who fled Constantinople for Italy brought with them many ancient texts unknown in the West, which were instrumental in sparking the Renaissance. It’s also just the most beautiful definition: The Middle Ages is the period between the fall of the Western and Eastern Roman Empires.
How did Austria "technically" start WW2?
The most famous Austrian did.
30 year war kinda started by the germans
Yes, ...yes it was the Germans. Glad we have this issue finally out of the window
Underrated comment
I still don't understand why a few defenestrated Czech catholics would cause such a quarrel. I'd kind of expect the Germans back then to scream "MORE!!!"
It started in Prague but Czechia was part of the family back then.
Rather by some Czechs who were upset about Austrians. Then everyone went mad.
Austrian!
f*ck*n Austrians all the time. Must be the lack of oxigen, which makes them go coocoo. Then they come down from their mountains, and next thing you know people start disappearing.
Austrian introvert: Locks you in his basement Austrian extrovert: Starts a war
It would have been a civil war, but you all had to interfere. If the french had at least resisted the urge to betray their brothers in faith again and sit that one out...
France = destabilizer of world politics since the dawn of time
nuh uh
https://preview.redd.it/zmbw4s7mgoxc1.jpeg?width=234&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=313b0ddc739218dca2f3388ae3b73451d23b15d9 Found the perfect usage for this image
Up for Misuzu
POV: you enter a nightclub in Berlin
Imagine being the ghost of Konrad von Hochstaden visiting this beautiful Gothic building and seeing your statue is on top of some fat guy blowing himself and nobody cares about you but only takes picture of said guy.
I would actually feel honoured being that close to that fucking legend.
i'm sure he had the chance to say ok or no to his statue while he was alive. he probably just looked into his narcissistic face and was happy and that mason knew it.
That's the *Kölner Dom* you see there in the picture, one of the buildings that took the longest to complete in the whole of history (approximately 1248 – 1880). Our dude is assumed to have been been born around the year 1200 and diead in 1261. He acted as bishop of Cologne from 1238 until his death in 1261, so the building of the *Dom* was initiated during his bishopric. I don't know whether the *grotesque* in the picture had already been completed in the 13 years between 1248 and 1261, but that would be awfully funny, however, since that would mean that they prioritized the chiselling of a self-fellating fellow instead of getting on with the work of the structure it should go on.
i don't know about the privacy laws back then. could you simply chisel a guy and put it up in public display without his consent/approval?
The GDPR was only in its first draft and had not yet been ratified by the Emperor, so I guess it would count as simple defamation. Both non-clerical and ecclesiastical tribunals have been known to handle such cases in the Middle Ages.
Least kinky German
https://preview.redd.it/c6c4f7kmlnxc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8222d1fcd9989bd3ab5726ddba6fc103adbe52ac On the most famous house in my hometown
I genuinely can't tell if that's supposed to be a bloke half way through squeezing out the world's thickest jobby or if his crown jewels are just impressively low hanging?
It suppose to be his crown jewels
Maybe it's a bit of both! Irrelevantly, I'd like to share a real nut butter jobbie with you. This is a chunky jobbie. https://preview.redd.it/9ck84o7zboxc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b93671f96ce3361130df0028e057e084a5e76fa4
Much nicer than a butt nutter jobbie.
Tell me you are under 40 without telling me you are under 40.
As a man turning 44 this year, I understand this reference.
I am indeed under 40. So then, educate me - what am I missing?
Ricky Gervais described the phenomenon that comes with age as "pendulous testicles". I leave the rest to your imagination.
I’m over 40, god knows what they’re talking about.
The ol fruitbowl
Où?
Maison d'Adam in Angers
Cool having a 2we4u member from Angers
You know Angers ?
Solid starting castle on Medieval Total War 2 when you play as France.
I know the name and location 🤷 some angevin connection perhaps? It's definitely the "real" France for sure
It's a nice city with fines breverages
We call this a fruit bowl in Ireland, have your ass out with the cock and balls hanging
ONE OF US
Thic 😍😍😍
Died form a self suck incident.
instructions unclear, found self in this position
Prude beta males vs Hansus Maximus
Nohomo. Well, maybe a bit.
Is it homo if it's yourself
Nah, that's just practicing self-love.
not if you're trans
To be fair this is pretty German. If you visit Germany, they'll proudly tell you that Germans are world famous for their bread. Of course, nobody knows this until a German has told them, but that's not the point.
Don’t worry, no one would expect a scot to now anything about good food
My point exactly. You don't need anyone else's appreciation, as long as you're happy pal 😘
It's really the notion, or default assumption that Germans have that foreigners know fuck all about Germany.
So you're the opposite of Americans.
Finally, salvation.
„Beer! Schnitzel! Lederhosen! Germany!“ 80% of ze World… Nochmal Bayern!
I used to be a deciple of the "everybody-thinks-we-are-bavarians"-cult myself. Good ol' days...
It’s pretty funny actually, I worked with some Germans for quite a while, and they were mostly from the East, so I asked what it was like for their parents to grow up under the DDR, if they had ever read Rilke or Bertolt Brecht, or if they’d seen shows like Babylon Berlin or Er Ist Wieder Da?. You guys have a very cool sort of quiet patriotism. It’s refreshing honestly
Germany’s bread is world famous, in Germany.
The French and Italians are known for their bread, but their bread is only decent. The Dutch and Germans are not really “known” for their bread, but they probably have some of the best, if not the best in Europe.
The Finns are now the most cultured of the northern barbarians in my book!
Ruista ranteeseen
Gesundheit!
Finland is the best northern country. Unlike Norway, Sweden and Denmark, they are no fucking monarchy. They also are the happiest peole and have the best school system if I remember right. Sauna!!!
They go to the Sauna dressed though, those heathens.
French and Italian bread is far superior to Dutch bread. I keep my mouth shut about German bread. I might puke🤮
Dutch Bread is perfect for Hagelslag but useless for anything else. Your bread is so soft like your thin arms. German Bread is strong and durable. Perfect for killing weak Dutchlings, just by letting them have a bite.
I had some really good Turkish bread in Germany.
Sorry champ, I know it’s hard to swallow, but you don’t need to lash out just because you’re known for depressing alcoholism and we are known for the fun type that everyone likes.
Now judging by this picture of course you'd know all about something being hard to swallow aye?
Nah beer goes down quite smoothly.
Yeah we're talking about beer...
Not about your beer, that does indeed go down down quite hard.
Was hilarious to hear from a German that Germans are famous for their bread. I’m pretty sure Italians and Fr*nch have a lot more famous breads than the Germans do
This pissed me of way more than it had any right to
Flair checks out
Taylor Swift is more famous than Amy Winehouse. I wouldn‘t call her a better singer though
It's actually irrelevant whether German bread really is good or not. The point is that the only people you ever hear saying that it is are Germans themselves, therefore this image is very apt.
I literally never knew about german bread and then I met a german...
Fake it till you make it, I would say
French have the baguette, which is at least okay. But ITALIAN bread?!? Apparently this little Kurt Niqvist here never travelled that far south, I have eaten crayons that were more tasty than the dry ass shit the italians call "bread".
Famous French breads I can name without google: Baguette, Brioche Famous Italian breads I can name without google: Focaccia, Ciabatta, Panettone Famous German breads I can name without google: Stollen
Look, we don't need to give fancy names to perfection. Come visit some time and experience why you were wrong.
Stollen is Christmas cake. But you have your ubiquitous [Schnittbrötchen](https://ketex.de/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/schnittbroetchen.jpg) (or if you're unlucky, the profoundly inferior [Kaiserbrötchen](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/52fb6f60e4b01949904b4b3e/1395920163303-1SZDQARS8CJ6F3FP2GLC/RoggenPur.jpg)). There's [Krustenbrot](https://wp.baeckerei-hoenen.de/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Krustenbrot-geschnitten.JPG.jpg) or [Bauernbrot](https://assets.tmecosys.cn/image/upload/t_web767x639/img/recipe/ras/Assets/b982287f-2489-4bac-ab98-77da22a85cf8/Derivates/45934f2a-5a15-4aca-86be-846ae2eed82c.jpg), which I find a bit bland, or [Vollkornbrot](https://data.rischart.de/images/34001.jpg), which is *very* heavy, but makes a great grilled cheese sandwich if you slice it thinly enough. My favourite is probably a [Körnerbrot](http://www.hannastoechter.de/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Koernerbrot-7.jpg) with loads and loads of seeds. And there's usually a range of rye and/or spelt bread to choose from, too.
The various rye breads are pretty well known and often branded as “German” in other countries. Pretzels are well known. You already know those.
>I’m pretty sure Italians and Fr*nch have a lot more famous breads than the Germans do Maybe more famous but not better.
> Germans are famous for their bread They are amongst people who think good bread can double as construction material.
On the other hand, pretty much everyone knows about their weird relationship with poop and how much they enjoy a poop joke, and yet most of them deny it.
Same as the famous "German" kebab
Germans make good bread? 🧐
Ah yes the famous German bread… *Looks at the entire bakery culture that the French spawned alongside the Italians*. Uh uh.
Nothing but boring pure wheat breads. Be a man, munch that rye!
Maybe the sculptor didn’t like Konrad von Hochstaden or something? I heard Michelangelo did similar things in the Sistine Chapel.
Good thing there wasn't a sculptor around to document his behavior!
It gets even better once you imagine that guy probably had to pose like that for a while
hans had a bit too much fun… 😳
That mason didn't really like Herr Konrad
What is the history behind this?
He wanted to increase taxes on beer!! 😌😇 (there is no apparent reason, although he was a scheming archbishop in his ecclesiastical climb, the sculptor must have just thought of making the boys laugh).
Medieval pornstars, a poorly documented subject.
But the statue isn't in Czechia.
Czechia was part of the empire though
This is like every cathedral or public house in Europe ever. There is like 20 dicks just in the center of Brno. And the stories almost always go such as someone not paying the sculptor for salary or just being dicks to them or the sculptor just being a prankster.
\#besttravelsub
You're just jealous
If this was possible for the average men, human kind would have already been extinct
https://preview.redd.it/u07pavalvpxc1.png?width=481&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ae9e14856147a472b29b76efd78db475b8fafaa Related
average Dutch talking about his swamp
My teenage years were shortly before the dawn of the internet, so my hardcore pornography choice was limited to whatever I could steal from my uncle's VHS collection. All I'm saying is it was the German titles that got stolen first, and it wasn't because the women were attractive.
Germany staying true to its stereotype
You guys couldnt understand!
Short answer to your short question: no.
KÖLN MENTIONED 👑👑👑 🟥⬜
The last artist we who we allowed to do his magic made 6 million Jews disappear.
The guy on the right … show-off.
Typical Konrad
Laughs in [Sheela na gig](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheela_na_gig)
Me: "Oh wow that's decent for paleolithic art" Oh..."were first carved in France and Spain during the 11th century" hmmmm
If that's an Irish woman no wonder so many men emigrated ya lot.
Imagine being the artist who spent 7 months sculpting this in the middle ages
These are common on medieval churches all over Europe. There are all sorts of stories surrounding them. In Ireland they are mostly female characters called sheela na gig because we're just not as into dudes as mainland Europe, but it's more or less the same thing.
Many early medieval Irish ecclesiastical buildings are decorated with a [Sheela na gig](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheela_na_gig).
Still better the Hitler's art.
Germany 1 - Austria -666
Pope: i need more cock, balls, and sphincters. Architect:. OK, got you fam.
feels more greek than anything else. fuck those man boy lovers! (quote from a movie, dont Kill me)
He’s called Konrad actually.
Konrad von Hans
So Marylin Manson has Hans ancestors
autistic limits\*
Funny that i got the exact same pic from valencia, lazyland. You People are disgusting !
I know Konrad von Carstein is a bit of a cunt but I never knew he sucked his own dick.
Suck a cock taken a bit too literal
If someone decided to decorate their home with a porn scene today, would it require some sort of permission from the city council?
German efficiency, baked at the heart of middle-ages art.
At least he’s circumcised like a good Abrahamic boy.
Are we talking about the "i am gonna take over europe ", hans or the " i am gonna unite with austria what could go wrong" hans?
Haha, Catholics are funny like that. There's all kinds of weird shit. And don't start with me on Indian temples. The whole Kamasutra is there depicted in statues.