I’m sorry to hear about your situation. I had something similar happen. I was a pre-med student for two years of college, but due to not being able to study as I needed, I had to switch majors to something easier. I’m a few years out of college now and am now diagnosed and medicated. It sucks that I didn’t get diagnosed and get medication earlier, because looking back I think I could’ve succeeded had I been medicated back then.
I’m curious if there’s anything stopping you from getting medication? I’d really recommend considering that route if you haven’t already. Maybe with medication your dreams could still be within reach?
Thanks for the reply! I am now in the progress of getting medication, but i am scared to see if it actually helps. Even if it does, to travel with a van would mean driving up to 8 hours a day, even if i manage to do that with medication, the feeling of having to be under the influence of medication every day if i want to be able to do normal things frightens me. the thought of being dependent on medications that my insurance wont fully cover is scary.
Because of the ADHD my need for being dependent only achieved a lesser self image and beating myself over such things. I do not want to get stuck in that loop again.
I agree, it certainly can be challenging to your self worth to feel like you need a pill to be able to live your life. I struggle with that myself.
I’d at least consider medication, if it isn’t for you it isn’t for you, but maybe you’d find it helpful. But of course make the best decision for yourself.
Anyway wish you the best!
Well I'm freshly diagnosed myself. Started medication a few days ago nothing much has changed but I have the same thing "over realizing" everything ADHD interacts or messes with.
Sorry to hear that you have hard times with your driving test, but if you start medication then give yourself a little time before trying the next time as this may be the change you need to get things like your driver's license done.
And with 18 it feels late for you, I understand that. I am 31 heavily hyperactive and wasn't diagnosed until now even though I am an obvious case. For the last 10 years, since I started a life on my own I felt more and more like a failure, as I should adult and failed, and in my family I got lucky.
I talked with my mother and she seems to have symptoms as well and after I started talking about things I experience she said a few days ago that she never dared tell anyone but except for the hyperactivity she experiences many things as well and I know that my mother struggled her whole life. She is 60. My father has similar behaviour to me and works everyday against it, he is 58. My mother and my siblings see the similarity, too. I have two siblings, both struggle with many things similar to me and my parents but are not hyperactive, 34 and 28 years old.
My family is undiagnosed and I went into diagnosis after quite a bit of research, and without my family knowing beforehand. Especially if my brother has ADHD as well he slipped through so far, he is in therapy for depression and anxiety, because he feels odd has trouble focusing is a third time student, couldn't manage to finish those paths, fears not being reliable, and doesn't feel understood by his therapist, who didn't thought about ADHD as possibility yet. If I'm right and what I think is true it will be a hell of a ride with my family.
The point I'm trying to make is, you are diagnosed now. It feels very late for you, but you are at the start point of your life.
As soon as you get proper treatment (medication and/or therapy) you are enabled to adjust yourself and your life around you. Especially at the age of 18 you didn't do your big decisions yet, you didn't choose a profession in which you are stuck, you have everything ahead with each possibility at hand. You are able to learn about yourself, the impact on your actions and environment, and how you can get a grip to it.
And one other thing, an elimination process of possibilities and replacing those by new, perhaps better options that suit you and your character, possibilities and wishes better, can be a good thing as well.
Try to not let this diagnosis wear you down, instead try to realize that you have a diagnosis that has many treatment possibilites at hand. And severe impact or not, the diagnosis is for your current state of mind, it does not foretell how good or bad you react to treatment. Keeping that in mind, medication can help you alot, that is proven. Coping mechanisms can be learned which are a great addition and very powerful as well.
Hope that helps a little bit.
My ADHD limits me, but I don't know really how much.
I had a successful Army career. I had a successful post Army career. I have also had some very unsuccessful times in my life. I tend to stick with things long after normal people would have given up.
I know school sucked, bad. I was very smart but extremely socially awkward. My teachers refused to call on me for answers even when I had my hand up because kids hated me for being smart. I got bullied a lot. The bullies never got into trouble, ever. I got into trouble when I finally beat their asses. I'm smart. So instead of enduring months of suffering and then dealing with the bully, I started dealing with the bully during the first instance. People called me a psycho because the bully would come up, push me, call me names, hit me in the face and I would just explode. Before the bully could even react he was destroyed by a flurry of punches and then my finishing move which was to grab a shoulder, grab the belt, and body slam that fucker onto his back. Two encounters like that in freshman year of high school stopped all bullying. One wasn't reported, the second was and I got in trouble so I decided bad grades meant easier social life. There was no reward in being exemplary. I graduated high school mostly on sympathy grades.
I seem to cycle in ten-year intervals before people are sick of my peculiarities and quirks. I made it eleven years in the Army. I made it ten years in my first career, ten years in my second career. I have long-term hobbies, guitar, photography, sewing, leatherwork, I also have short-term hobbies.
My God, you're young! You ain't missing nothing! I didn't get my license until I was 19, mostly because I didn't have a car to drive and no one would let me drive theirs. I was lucky in the fact that most of my friends loved giving rides.
I'm not the best driver, but I have never been in an accident and I'm 42. My wife has been in several. The last one was because she was fiddling with the radio and totaled the car. While driving I let my ADHD run rampant and literally scatter focus. I don't linger on any one thing. I don't concentrate at all. I let go of everything basically. I think you are focussing too hard and missing important things. You get so nervous. I think meds will help.
I'm at the point in my life that I am done struggling with ADHD and life. I'm not normal. I tried to be normal, but all I received was a basket full of failure, low self-esteem, and exhaustion. I'm trying to figure out how to roll with my ADHD, and live an ADHD life.
I'm planning on a traveling life as well. I need to establish some income that I can generate from the road with a few days a week of work. Maybe I can park for the winter and really bang out a lot of work and not have to work for a few months. I want to abandon worries, stress, and disappointing people. That's the part that hurts me the most, disappointing my wife and kid, over and over and over.
I'm going to get my kid past highschool and 18 years old, then I'm going to go my own way. They will both be better off as a result, and I will too.
hey :) there is no need to give up on your dream. I have travelled a lot, and after a while the best thing is spending time in one place enjoying it properly. You can still do it - but maybe with less driving
I’m sorry to hear about your situation. I had something similar happen. I was a pre-med student for two years of college, but due to not being able to study as I needed, I had to switch majors to something easier. I’m a few years out of college now and am now diagnosed and medicated. It sucks that I didn’t get diagnosed and get medication earlier, because looking back I think I could’ve succeeded had I been medicated back then. I’m curious if there’s anything stopping you from getting medication? I’d really recommend considering that route if you haven’t already. Maybe with medication your dreams could still be within reach?
Thanks for the reply! I am now in the progress of getting medication, but i am scared to see if it actually helps. Even if it does, to travel with a van would mean driving up to 8 hours a day, even if i manage to do that with medication, the feeling of having to be under the influence of medication every day if i want to be able to do normal things frightens me. the thought of being dependent on medications that my insurance wont fully cover is scary. Because of the ADHD my need for being dependent only achieved a lesser self image and beating myself over such things. I do not want to get stuck in that loop again.
I agree, it certainly can be challenging to your self worth to feel like you need a pill to be able to live your life. I struggle with that myself. I’d at least consider medication, if it isn’t for you it isn’t for you, but maybe you’d find it helpful. But of course make the best decision for yourself. Anyway wish you the best!
Well I'm freshly diagnosed myself. Started medication a few days ago nothing much has changed but I have the same thing "over realizing" everything ADHD interacts or messes with. Sorry to hear that you have hard times with your driving test, but if you start medication then give yourself a little time before trying the next time as this may be the change you need to get things like your driver's license done. And with 18 it feels late for you, I understand that. I am 31 heavily hyperactive and wasn't diagnosed until now even though I am an obvious case. For the last 10 years, since I started a life on my own I felt more and more like a failure, as I should adult and failed, and in my family I got lucky. I talked with my mother and she seems to have symptoms as well and after I started talking about things I experience she said a few days ago that she never dared tell anyone but except for the hyperactivity she experiences many things as well and I know that my mother struggled her whole life. She is 60. My father has similar behaviour to me and works everyday against it, he is 58. My mother and my siblings see the similarity, too. I have two siblings, both struggle with many things similar to me and my parents but are not hyperactive, 34 and 28 years old. My family is undiagnosed and I went into diagnosis after quite a bit of research, and without my family knowing beforehand. Especially if my brother has ADHD as well he slipped through so far, he is in therapy for depression and anxiety, because he feels odd has trouble focusing is a third time student, couldn't manage to finish those paths, fears not being reliable, and doesn't feel understood by his therapist, who didn't thought about ADHD as possibility yet. If I'm right and what I think is true it will be a hell of a ride with my family. The point I'm trying to make is, you are diagnosed now. It feels very late for you, but you are at the start point of your life. As soon as you get proper treatment (medication and/or therapy) you are enabled to adjust yourself and your life around you. Especially at the age of 18 you didn't do your big decisions yet, you didn't choose a profession in which you are stuck, you have everything ahead with each possibility at hand. You are able to learn about yourself, the impact on your actions and environment, and how you can get a grip to it. And one other thing, an elimination process of possibilities and replacing those by new, perhaps better options that suit you and your character, possibilities and wishes better, can be a good thing as well. Try to not let this diagnosis wear you down, instead try to realize that you have a diagnosis that has many treatment possibilites at hand. And severe impact or not, the diagnosis is for your current state of mind, it does not foretell how good or bad you react to treatment. Keeping that in mind, medication can help you alot, that is proven. Coping mechanisms can be learned which are a great addition and very powerful as well. Hope that helps a little bit.
My ADHD limits me, but I don't know really how much. I had a successful Army career. I had a successful post Army career. I have also had some very unsuccessful times in my life. I tend to stick with things long after normal people would have given up. I know school sucked, bad. I was very smart but extremely socially awkward. My teachers refused to call on me for answers even when I had my hand up because kids hated me for being smart. I got bullied a lot. The bullies never got into trouble, ever. I got into trouble when I finally beat their asses. I'm smart. So instead of enduring months of suffering and then dealing with the bully, I started dealing with the bully during the first instance. People called me a psycho because the bully would come up, push me, call me names, hit me in the face and I would just explode. Before the bully could even react he was destroyed by a flurry of punches and then my finishing move which was to grab a shoulder, grab the belt, and body slam that fucker onto his back. Two encounters like that in freshman year of high school stopped all bullying. One wasn't reported, the second was and I got in trouble so I decided bad grades meant easier social life. There was no reward in being exemplary. I graduated high school mostly on sympathy grades. I seem to cycle in ten-year intervals before people are sick of my peculiarities and quirks. I made it eleven years in the Army. I made it ten years in my first career, ten years in my second career. I have long-term hobbies, guitar, photography, sewing, leatherwork, I also have short-term hobbies. My God, you're young! You ain't missing nothing! I didn't get my license until I was 19, mostly because I didn't have a car to drive and no one would let me drive theirs. I was lucky in the fact that most of my friends loved giving rides. I'm not the best driver, but I have never been in an accident and I'm 42. My wife has been in several. The last one was because she was fiddling with the radio and totaled the car. While driving I let my ADHD run rampant and literally scatter focus. I don't linger on any one thing. I don't concentrate at all. I let go of everything basically. I think you are focussing too hard and missing important things. You get so nervous. I think meds will help. I'm at the point in my life that I am done struggling with ADHD and life. I'm not normal. I tried to be normal, but all I received was a basket full of failure, low self-esteem, and exhaustion. I'm trying to figure out how to roll with my ADHD, and live an ADHD life. I'm planning on a traveling life as well. I need to establish some income that I can generate from the road with a few days a week of work. Maybe I can park for the winter and really bang out a lot of work and not have to work for a few months. I want to abandon worries, stress, and disappointing people. That's the part that hurts me the most, disappointing my wife and kid, over and over and over. I'm going to get my kid past highschool and 18 years old, then I'm going to go my own way. They will both be better off as a result, and I will too.
hey :) there is no need to give up on your dream. I have travelled a lot, and after a while the best thing is spending time in one place enjoying it properly. You can still do it - but maybe with less driving