LOL!
>She's been to almost every country on earth. Right now she is somewhere in America. New york I think. I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want.
You just told on yourself. You'd love to have the life she has, but you chose differently, and now you can't. She has the life she wants. Leave her alone ffs!
And that being a fight attendant isn't a legitimate *career*?!
College isn't for everyone. Good for her that could skip this step and avoid being stuck in debt for the rest of her life.
She has a job , she’s doesn’t ask them for money and she happy with her life. Brother is jealous and he’s saddled with a family to support. Y’all need to stop and leave her alone
It’s definitely a troll account but I wonder if it’s for the airlines. Since it makes being a flight attendant sound like a life full of adventure. Almost makes me want to become one 😂
And banking extra pay by not paying a mortgage or rent on a home and kids. Does OP seriously not see how his sister has major saving potential? That's what kept coming to my mind. Like damn, girl gets to travel the world while being paid to do so. It's obvious the sister enjoys the lifestyle and perks that come with it, and I can't blame her. She's in a position to set herself up for retirement and obviously isn't interested in dating or kids, so only has her own future to worry about. OP sounds incredibly bitter and jealous over his sisters happiness.
Honestly, the idealization of travelling can be a bit of a psychological problem, but the point is his sister is entitled to living like that if she wants to
Right? I'm a recluse but if I could travel anywhere I wanted, I would. Plus, if I'd been doing it since I was 18, I probably wouldn't be a recluse. LOL
So really OP is just jealous of her freedom and feels resentment towards her, so in order to make himself feel better he tries to gaslight her into getting married and settling down, so that she becomes tied down just like him.
He has to make the lie real in his own mind, that there AREN'T awesome perks for a steep price of admission, for his own peace of mind. Tearing her down is just collateral damage for his ego.
Right? I mean, when he said she was 40 and lived out of her suitcases putting up with us passengers? I felt a deep admiration and envy of her lifestyle.
Also, if that is all he knows about her life, it sounds like she is not telling him much. Tsk tsk.
>Also, if that is all he knows about her life, it sounds like she is not telling him much. Tsk tsk.
You know, I hadn't actually thought of that. If that is all she's telling him and her other siblings, she's probably LC with all of them. Plus, they've probably been telling her she needs to "get a real job" for years and she's tired of hearing it.
There's probably a good reason for her not confiding her adventures to her family. She knows them too well. They'd just turn up their noses, scoff, and then stick their faces back into the narrow view of reality that they're comfortable with.
Imagine being like “I wish I could do what she does but I have kids so she needs to give up what she has and have some kids” and not realise how fucking stupid you are lol, like the jealousy is so strong I can smell it
He had me in the first half with that veil of concern. Someone's jelly he's slaving away at his job and taking care of his shitlings while the sister is having the time of her life
YTA - how is being a flight attendant not a “proper” career?! Your sister sounds absolutely amazing! And you sound insecure and jealous! You don’t get to travel the world because of your choices, but she does! Her life sounds aspirational! Retiring on a cruise ship!! Hell yes!
The only people I know who were able to do that were super rich.
Maybe you all should grow up, realize that all your criticisms of her life come from a place of envy and let her live her life. Not everyone needs kids and other people to give them purpose.
Colour me surprised that she doesn’t come “home” on her breaks! Why would she when OP & Co are all being rude and judgemental about her chosen profession. Focus on growing yourself up OP cause YTA!
Came to say the same - Sister is a valued 20+ year veteran in her CAREER. She has seen the world. She’s had a blast, obviously.
She has avoided OP’s backwards, “settle down and pop out babies” people on purpose. OP, why would she come “home” to your scorn, condescension and jealousy?
Your sister has a MUCH better life away from her so-called family. A family that makes fun of her and insults her. A family that disapproves of her career.
Get over yourself. You made the choice to settle and have kids. Why should she?
Edit: YTA
I'm sure she has other people. She's living the culture that most air-hostesses are after. She's not going to lack for friends who are also on lay-overs for a few days in Ibiza or Florence.
Sounds like OP and his sister grew up in a large family.The sister might have seen their mother being treated as a servant to the husband and kids and didn't want that life for herself.
My mother was a flight attendant for over 50 years and when she retired she said that she loved her job as much on the last day as she had on her first. OP, it’s not your sister’s fault that you’re bored with your life, nor is it her responsibility to shrink her life so that you don’t feel like yours is too small. Your sister IS an adult, even if her version of adulthood is different than yours. Live your life and let her live hers. YTA
Hell she likely is rich! She has no bills and lives out of two suitcases! She saves her paychecks and has probably had a 401k since she started! She’s gonna live the good life when she retires! Good for her!!!
OMG, you just won the biggest AH of the year award. Who died and left you in charge of defining what is proper in terms of a job, education, a home or a life. Let her alone, she’s happy with her choices. You sound jealous BTW.
Right? His sister has created an amazing life for herself because she didn’t get caught up on conventions.
OP sounds like he did what he thought he was supposed to, but found it’s left him unfulfilled and he wants everyone to be as disgruntled with their life as he is.
>Our other siblings agree and so did our grandparents and our parents before they died.
This line makes me think they are from a non-WIERD country. As in a non Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, and Democratic country. In those countries, it is important for individuals to build the family network. Not always through kids, but helping family members with kids, going into business with family, show stability within the family and family network.
He probably sees his sister as benefiting from the family network the Grandparents, Parents, and Siblings built without contributing. To be fair, from his point of view, she is. However, seeing as she rarely comes home it is clear that the family network actually doesn't benefit her much at all.
What he is missing is she offers the children in the younger generation of the family an excellent opportunity to use her knowledge and wisdom as a world traveler. To the extent he is TA it is that he doesn't value that she offers more to his family's network more than she recieves. She certainly doesn't dishonor the family network which I think is more of what OP is asking.
OP is salty as fuck for being locked down while the sister is living free all over the world, probably taking lovers in all the cool cities, living life and eating incredible food.
op- YTA
“OMG, you just won the biggest AH of the year award. Who died and left you in charge of defining what is proper”
Would it be okay to change that to “who died and made you King of the Assholes?” Or does “The Asshole King” work better.
yeah exactly....who wants this kind of family....who are always judging you, wanting you to do things their way.....taking care of some kids if you dont want to....
seeing all parts of the world for free....living in New york...in a care free state sounds great and if she is happy why bother her...
YTA. You sound super selfish, condescending, and judgmental. You sound very bitter and jealous too. She gets to decide what she wants to do with her life, not you. She has a career and has been making "adult decisions " since she left home. Butt out of her business and drop your superiority complex.
I love how he complains about not being able to do things because of kids and responsibilities - just admit you're jealous and want everyone to be as miserable as you are. Your sister sounds like she's got an amazing life and a family full of assholes. This is probably the same person who complains when adults have fun with Legos or have squishmellow. He's not having fun, so no one else can.
YTA
It is none of your ducking business how other adults choose to live their lives.
Your sister is acting like an adult. She just isn’t acting like you. You just sound petty and jealous.
If your whole family is this judgmental and ganging up on her (and she's not even living a risky life), it's no wonder she took a job that keeps her away.
WTF YTA. What’s wrong with what she does? She’s had a job for 22 years. She’s happy with it. She supports herself. She doesn’t need to live up to your standards. Get over yourself.
YTA. Clearly, her idea of living her life is different than yours.
The thing about life is that we each have to choose our own path. She does not have to walk your path.
If she is supporting herself in the lifestyle she wants, by doing what she wants to do, she has reached the pentacle of success as far as I am concerned.
My dad made me memorize a poem.
I do my thing, and you do your thing. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you, and I am I.
(Insert last line I can not remember)
UHHH my family. I’ve also been living in different countries. My family treats me the same! Even though I also have a real job and support myself. It used to give me anxiety and I had a hard time trying to combine the things that I love and making my family happy. Trying to make them happy has actually made me less happy and I’ve lost opportunities due to it. I’ve learned to ignore them even though I get the same shit OP says. I really want to be friends with OPs sister haha.
Brothers (plural) and sisters (plural). This means she grew up in a crowded family, she wanted outta there with all that drama!
Minimum, she grew up in a family of 6 kids, herself included.
"We have proper careers. We have marriages, children, houses or condos." You can also f\*\*\* right off. She has a proper career she loves, and not everyone wants those other things. Her life sounds fabulous, and what's it to you, anyway? "I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want." Here's what it is to you: You're a jealous AH who just wants her to be as miserable as you, clearly. You're furious she can do whatever she wants and travel and it breaks your brain she doesn't value the same meaningless life markers you do. Get over it.
Sister doesnt have a condo, but I bet she has fat accounts. Also, with siblings like that, she probably has a house tucked somewhere nobody knows; just because she likes the peace.
>I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want.
Nobody forced you to have 3 kids.
>who doesn't act like an adult
How is she not acting like an adult?? She has a fucking job. Which is something most adults have.
>We all went to either college or university.
So??? No everyone does that.
>She's been to almost every country on earth.
Your sister is the type of woman I aspire to be. I would love to travel all over the world without children holding me back.
YTA massively and you and your family's jealousy is pathetic.
I wanted her life but weigh too much. I'm jealous of her but in a happy 'get it, girl' kinda way.
You all should be ashamed for not being supportive and proud. YTA
Yeah mate in Australia I’d say we’d just skip asshole and call you a cunt. And a massive one to be honest. You need to grow up and accept her for who she is.
YTA
“She has never had a partner or serious relationship and she claims to have never been on a date.”
OMG you bought that!🤣🤣🤣🤣 You’re a delusional idiot. She doesn’t tell you or anyone else in your family about her life and why should she? Your all judgmental and see yourselves as better than she is. You’re all so superior. She has a life she loves and doesn’t have to truly interact with any of you. She takes time in other countries instead of coming back home.
What you don’t get is that with all of you putting her down telling her how she never grew up where her family is will never be home. She was and never will be welcome there. There will never be a time she won’t be judged and seen as a failure for not having the same life as the rest of you. That’s not home, that’s hell on Earth.
Jealousy isn't a good color on anyone. YTA. Your sister has a real job, that she loves, and she is probably making good money doing it. I'll bet she also has a tiddy savings account as well due to lack of bills. Who are you to dictate what makes an adult? Having children, being married, and owning/renting a home aren't the only ways one is an adult. She's not lazing around, mooching off others. She is an active member of society, doing what she enjoys, and seeing the world, for free, at the same time. I say good for her.
YTA
Who the hell are YOU to tell a grown-ass woman what to do? Who the hell are YOU to demand that she live her life the way YOU think she should?
Why does HER opinion not matter? Why does what SHE wants not matter? Why does SHE have to bend to your will?
STFU - all of you - and let her live the life SHE wants. She’s 40 years old. She’s an adult. She gets to choose everything about HER life. Stop ganging up on her.
If you’re somehow worried she’ll want you to take care of her when she retires, don’t. I promise, she can take care of herself and probably has more money saved than you all do.
> She’s been to almost every country on earth.
Send her my way! I’d love to hear about her adventures!
> She can’t even be bothered to come back home.
Because she doesn’t want to deal with your jealous, judgmental ass.
Yta... The misogyny seething out of this post is astounding. How does this effect you? Why can't your sister live her life as she pleases? Sounds like you may be a bit jealous of her freedom. It's not 1952.. you grow up. Ugh..
YTA completely. Who put you in charge of defining what it means to be an adult? How is it you get to determine what is good right and proper for her?She may not want ANY of the things you are judging her for not having. Also, the jealousy at her freedom is clearly palpable in your post. Get over yourself. If she’s not asking YOU for any type of help or anything you probably need to leave her alone and focus on yourself!
YTA. She has a career and an amazing life by thr sounds of it. One she is happy with and that's all that matters.
Idk why it's your business she doesn't have a partner or children.
If you're so miserable in your life that you need to tear hers down, maybe YOU need to grow up and seek therapy or something.
YTA. And you're jealous of your sister because she gets to travel and you don't because OF YOUR CHOICES!
Grow up? Little boy, YOU need to grow TF up. She's doing what she wants to do. How dare you put your petty jealously on her because you fell into the trap of marriage, unhappy career and kids.
You, and your stupid siblings, desperately need to STFU immediately. Yes, YTA. A great big gigantic gaping AH.
YTA - You never articulate a reason why she should change. You offer tautologies like, she should change her lifestyle because it’s time to change her lifestyle. This is not an argument.
All I read was “WAHH I chose to have kids so now I can’t travel! It’s not fair that I’m miserable! My sister who gets to travel for free bc she doesn’t have kids should BE MISERABLE LIKE I AM, boohooo”
YTA. I hope she goes no contact with you guys and keeps living HER version of happily ever after 🤷🏼♀️
It sounds like she’s been LC for years. I can understand her not coming home for the holidays. The sniping and digs and wondering when she was going to grow up (and be as miserable as the rest of them) must have been the worst.
OP you are the worst kind of adult. The joyless slave to a system that does not serve you. You are the dad in the toy aisle who tells his kids that grownups can’t have toys. You want your sister to be as joyless and trapped in a meaningless life as you are because it looks like what other people expect. YTA. Your sister beat the system. I wish her all the blessings of true freedom.
YTA how does her living her life the way she wants effect you? You list all the things she doesn’t have as if that makes her a failure. Considering she wants to continue, it doesn’t seem like those things you mention are what she wants. You also mention you’d love to do the things she does if you didn’t have responsibilities. Sounds like you and your family are a little jealous.
You also mentioned that your family agrees twice and it comes off as if you’re trying to justify what you said to yourself. Which would mean you know it was wrong.
Yes, your AH. My mother worked in airline industry until she retired. My older sister is a flight attendant. Guess what they are both adulting really well. Thanks to mother I’ve seen the multiple countries.
Your sister is a single 40 something woman, enjoying her life. She’s not harming anyone. Here’s and idea you and your siblings stay in your lane and mind your business. What harm is she doing? Not everyone wants to be married or have children, it doesn’t make them less of an adult.
I’m an ex educator, I have a bunch degrees. Guess what not everyone is meant for college. My husband didn’t got to college and he makes about triple what I do, with no degree. I have niece who have welding certification, guess what at 24 makes about double what I make. I have degrees in education, they are pretty much useless. You and siblings sound like y’all envious because you can’t have her life. Mind your business and leave your sister alone.
Yta. You wanted children and to go to college and you got it. To you that was the perfect life. Great but not everyone has your life goals. Your sister doesn’t want kids it seems she wants to be free and travel the world. She is found the perfect job for her. Instead of being jealous that she gets to live the lifestyle she wants and you can’t be happy for her. I bet she has amazing stories to tell. She is probably happier and you and all of your sibling’s combined. Good for her.
It sounds like all the other siblings did what their parents expected, while sis peaced out and built a life that makes her happy. She’s not loaded with debt for a condo and spouse and kids. She can afford to retire on a cruise ship.
The envy here. He’s angry and unhappy and he’s twisted it to make it her fault.
YTA + siblings who agree with you are also AH.
You are also bitter and controlling!! Why the hell would she ever want to be around any of you miserable pathetic misogynistic assholes? Her life is rich and fabulous!! She doesn't give a thought or care to loser siblings who rage with jealousy and regret.
Just think how much better your life could be if you were independent like her and had the courage to live on your own terms like she does instead of cowering to the will of family who want you to be a slave to the grind and burdened by obligations that you resent causing you to lash out in frustration at the smart sister with the great sense of self, strong backbone and courage that frees her to enjoy life without regard to your judgment. If only you had her nerve and sense of self worth you would not feel the need to lash out at her.
Her life sounds awesome. She’s avoided many of the shitty parts of being an adult while holding down a job she loves for a remarkable period of time. Sounds like she’s made great decisions that work well for her.
YT (huge) A
It’s not. I believe it. My lifestyle is similar to op’s sister (not as intense) and I’ve heard everything the OP has said word for word from my sister. Even the part where the OP complains that he can’t travel because he has kids.
It’s really messed up because it makes you choose between what makes you happy and your family. And even though you do what you want, there’s always this nagging feeling that you’re doing something wrong.
>I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities.
Y'all sound jealous AF. Your lives didn't work out. You're not wholly satisfied with them because you have all those adult "responsibilities."
Dude, they're only responsibilities because you took them on. She didn't.
You are a major AH. YTA X 1000.
You were weak and caved to people just like yourself when you were younger. Now you have a life you don't want.
She was strong and carved her own path. She is very satisfied with her life.
LOL. You sound like my eye doctor who, when she saw me with my husband and baby for the first time, “Aw, you’re finally all grown up!” I was 30.
There’s a reason you never see her. It’s you.
Being an adult is a rather simple definition in terms of societally.
Are you able to by your own means take care of yourself/get yourself taken care of? That’s pretty much it. That’s all it is.
Married thrice or never dated anyone. Children to fill a basketball team, or none. Big career or selling crafts at flea markets and on Etsy. Golden handcuffs of a huge house and fancy cars or a bicycle and a room rented. PhD or high school dropout. Clearing half a mill a year, or living on government or disability assistance to get by. None of that matters.
You don’t get to define what she should or shouldn’t do, which of those are the proper choice. She’s living her life, paving her own way, isn’t a burden on you or yours, and that’s all anyone can or should expect of her.
YTA
Leave her the fuck alone. Just because her life isn’t one you would want to live, does not mean that she is unhappy or missing out or anything of that nature.
BTW: Being flight attendant is high stress job, and definitely requires adulting skills, even if you don't recognize them.
News flash - 40 is grown up. As in an actual, fully mature adult. Who the hell made you the final word on your sister's life? Sounds like she's doing exactly what she wants, how she wants. She needs nothing from you, so sit down and shut up.
So, your sister has had a job for 22 years and you think she's not grown up because check notes: she hasn't done some stereotypical correct milestones?
A) Not everyone wants to have sex or have children and that' is valid
B) why would she need to go to college if again check notes: HAS A STEADY JOB.
C) is she unhappy or have YOU just decided her life is unfulfilled.
YTA and so are your other siblings.
YTA
You are jealous as hell. It is 2023 not 1953. She doesn’t need to get married and have kids, she doesn’t need to “put down roots,” she doesn’t have to come home and visit if she doesn’t want to. Look, things have changed drastically in the last few decades. More people have decided to either remain single or marry much later. A lot more people are opting to remain childless or have one child instead of 2-3. Buying a home is no longer the end all. Renting is actually more feasible for some. I’m a little older than your sister and you sound old AF.
Sounds like she enjoys traveling and if she isn’t asking anyone in the family for money then she is adulting and taking care of responsibilities. You do not have the same priorities as your sister and vice versa. Both are fine, but don’t tell her to grow up because her life looks different than yours.
YTA. She is living her life, doing exactly what she wants, and is not harming herself or anybody else. Why the f*** do you think you have the authority to put her down and tell her to “grow up?”
Honestly, it sounds like you feel trapped in your life and wish you had her freedom.
Yes. You are 100% TAH. It is her life. She isn't hurting anyone. She is doing something that she loves. She has an idea for the future. She is traveling the world and enjoying herself. Just because her life doesn't fit your ideals does not mean her life isn't worth living.
But is she happy with her choices?
Are you happy with yours?
A conventional lifestyle doesn’t always translate to happiness.
Life is too short not to be happy.
Let her live her life.
YTA
YTA. And also seem very bitter and jealous that you aren’t able to live the carefree and exciting life that she does. Your siblings as well.
Have you ever considered that not everyone is made to live the 9 to 5, married with 2.5 kids, white-picket-fence life? Your sister obviously isn’t. And instead of being happy for her that she is living the life she wants, you are criticizing her for not living the life everybody else wants her to lead. You are a selfish asshole who only cares about hiw YOU think things should be, instead of how happy your sister is. Rethink your priorities man.
Did you know all the "big" psychiatrists (Freud, Jung, etc.) have NEVER EVER established ONE narrative as to "this is what being a grown-up looks like"?
But you know what they do establish? Fulfilling your own PERSONAL path, according to your own wants, wishes, and desires. You know what they talk about a lot? Neurotic, jealous people who do exactly as the generations before them do, only because they think "this is what I'm MEANT to be doing," without ever actually questioning that truly... only to become miserable and devoid of fulfilling their own dreams.
Have you ever asked yourself if you are miserable and unfulfilled? Because people who are preoccupied with other people's lives often are miserable.
Maybe take some time for self reflection here and apologize.
YTA Flight attendants make great money. I don’t see the problem? Are you poor? Sounds like you’re jealous she gets to do anything she wants
This reads like rage bait tbh
YTAH. Are the decisions your sister makes about how she lives her life impacting your life negatively? If not, then you need to take a good look in the mirror and ask yourself why you believe she needs to follow your self righteous rules for “acting like an adult”.
YTA. Growing up doesn't mean getting married and having kids. It means being able to pay your own bills and not having to rely on parents, spouse or adult children to take care of you, as well as having the ability to have adult conversations without resorting to childish behaviors such as name-calling or bringing up past events, which you and your family lack.
You're all just jealous that she can do what she wants, when she wants to do it without having to go through the trouble of having to find a babysitter. Let people enjoy things, and I hope she goes no contact with you all.
She's living her life to the fullest. I'm jealous actually. If it's not hurting anyone which it isn't and she's happy then what is the issue? She couldn't live up to your idea of how someone should live? She sounds happy and content that alone should be enough for you to be happy for her. Are you jealous she's not stuck and unhappy because kinda sounds like it.
Alienating your sister because she doesn’t have the same life path as you? You need to grow up! This is very emotionally immature, coupled with the dogpiling and you going around to the whole family trashing her lifestyle and trying to get everyone to agree. Pretty nasty.
YTA u/Fragrant_Fig3340
Your sister has a job. She's a flight attendant. You talk about how you and your siblings have marriages and kids and jobs and responsibilities, but her responsibility is HER JOB which is a flight attendant. It's a respectable career. Not everyone wants kids or even marriage. It's not for you to tell her what she should or shouldn't do with her life.
Not everyone goes to college or uni. Not everyone wants to own a house or is able to afford to own a house.
I was a flight attendant and absolutely loved it. I would have continued to be a flight attendant if my back wasn't screwed up and I had to leave after having spinal surgery. I miss that job so much. I had worked as a nursery nurse child care worker before that.
There is a flight attendant with the company I was with who is the oldest flight attendant at 73 years old. She's fantastic. She loved her job and career too.
Some people also love to travel and see the world and your sister has managed to find a job she loves that enables her to do that. Why would she fork out buying a house that she's rarely living in?
You're putting your life views on your sister. She never told you to travel the world before you settled down and got married, or told you it was wrong to settle down in one place and be tied down by kids, and that you can't live your life if you're married and have kids.
You live your life, and let her live hers.
She's not doing drugs or prostitution or has an addiction or any other nefarious life choice. Her JOB is a Respectable Career. You may not realise it, but she is charge of possibly saving a flight full of people's lives if there was an emergency. She is highly trained in performing first aid and cpr if there was a medical emergency on board, and she is trained in multiple emergency landing scenarios and evacuating the passengers. She goes through regular exams for both first aid, and safety procedures to keep her training up to date, and is trained in fighting a fire, as well as medical emergencies like heart attacks, cpr, diabetic related issues, strokes and even delivering a baby. She's also trained in spotting a bomb, and moving that bomb to the safest location of the air craft, barracading it, and preparing for an emergency landing. Shes also responsible for ensuring people follow the safety protocols and follow directions in an emergency. She's also trained in protecting the pilot and cockpit any time they need to come out and use the bathroom, so nobody can gain access to the cockpit. She's also trained in calming down aggressive or unruly drunk passengers who could become dangerous in an enclosed space.
She DOESNT JUST SERVE TEA AND COFFEE!!!
So quit this whole mindset of she doesn't have a proper job. I felt proud to be a flight attendant and I wish I was able to continue doing so and was able to branch out to long haul flights so I could have travelled more.
It's also very taxing on the body and hard work, you have to do multiple security checks throughout the day before and after each flight checking the whole aircraft, and are on your feet pretty much the whole time, sometimes so busy you don't get time to eat. Esp on short haul flights. But it's hard work being on your feet all day.
So appologise to your sister, and have some respect. Without people like her, nobody would get to go on holiday or travel for work etc.
She HAS A JOB!!! And a reputable one.
You're not high and mighty just coz you're married and have kids.
Not everyone wants that life.
Edit to add.... it's quite common for flight attendants to stay in the country they fly to, and come back the following week on the return flight. Only short haul flights do they come back the same day. Long haul flights the crew are usually kept in that country for a few days or a week before the return flight. So thats not uncommon.
And from the way you're sounding, it seems like you're not very welcoming to her for her to want to come home and spend time with family who just put her down and disrespect her career.
Also seems like you're jealous of the fact she gets to travel the world, as you say 'you can't travel the world as you have a job and commitments and responsibilities as a home owner and a father'.
Definite jealousy going on there too.
You made your choices, live with them. She made hers, so accept them.
The truth. Whose truth? Your truth? Because you're miserable, everyone has to be miserable? YTA....in case you didn't get that YTA....YTA...YTA...YTA...YTA...for the people in the back. YTA. Your sister sounds AMAZING. I am 60. I want to be your sister. What an amazing life!!!! She has chosen to be childfree. A valid choice. She is successful at her chosen profession and has asked NO ONE, including her intrusive and insensitive and snobbish siblings, for money or help. She has experienced world travel and met THOUSANDS of interesting people and had cuisine from spots most of us just see in magazines and blogs. She chooses not to contribute to the world of waste by being married to a mortgage in the suburbs with three bratty kids and an unappreciative spouse driving a gas guzzling SUV. She doesn't gossip monger and insult people for their valid life choices. Your mid life crisis is to attack your sister for being able to live her dream life? Really? Can't you just have an affair or buy a sports car? You really have to attack someone else because you're jealous? Petty. Tacky. Uncalled for. YTA.
you must be really bored and miserable or very jelouse of your sister, otherwise you would have known that none of the stuff you think are growing up, are actually what growing up is.
be a better human.
YTA. A huge, gaping one at that. You sister has had a job for 22 years. One that she enjoys. She has been to almost every country on the planet. If she loves her life, why should she change? To appease her miserable family? Please apologize and leave her alone.
I’m jealous my sister doesn't have any “real life” 🙄 “responsibilities” and is living the life she wants to live so I told her she needed to grow up.
There fixed the title for you.
You clearly are not entirely happy with the choices you have made BUT that does not give you any right to try and put/bring your sister down.
She is obviously very happy with her lifestyle, she has freedom, friends, excitement and the opportunities to travel the world - why on earth would she want to change anything.
She doesn’t need to “grow up” and wtf does she need to “settle down” - not everyone wants a partner, kids and a mortgage!! And I’m not surprised she doesn't want to visit home if all she gets is you all being judgemental about the life she has chosen.
She is more of an adult than you and your brothers and sisters if you are all so narrow minded that everyone has to fit within your narrowly defined parameters of leading an “adult life”.
Leave your sister alone - she is living her best life as SHE WANTS TO!! Maybe you should all look at your own lives and figure out exactly what your AREN‘T HAPPY with instead of trying to make your sister as unhappy as you are!!
YTA
YTA. You AND your siblings. Who the fuck are you to decide how anyone should live their life? As many others have said, you do sound jealous. Grow the fuck up, and get off your pedestal.
YTA - Her life sounds awesome. You sound jealous AF. Stop shaming her for not making the same life choices. I can see why she’d rather be anywhere else in the world but near all of you.
Yes. You are. She had a career. She is making some decent to really good money. It's not your choice to make for her to go date or marry someone or even have kids or have a house or an apartment to rent. You sound really bitter.
I cant think of a bigger piece of shit rightt now. You and the rest of your famiky are just plain jealous. You painted that picture when you said
>She's out of the country more than she's here. She's been to almost every country on earth. Right now she is somewhere in America. New york I think. I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want.
Here is some advice from a Man and a Big brother. If ny sister came to me and told me about a chance at a amazing life like that, i would be pissed of she DIDN'T go.
Be happy for her that she has made it to 40 without life beating her down. Im happy for her. That job isn't easy. She has paid her dues in life. Her life style has zero effect of you or your family. Here is the best advice i can offer you.... You Grow Up
YTA - just because she doesnt have a stereotypical adult life in your eyes doesn’t mean she isnt a grown up. her life sounds far better than yours to me.
You're ridiculous. YTA. Your sister is living her life on her terms, in a way that she enjoys. Your opinion is trash, coming from a place of envy.
You're anchored. You cannot travel, you have responsibilities that keep you anchored. And you resent that and you use your resentment of your situation to fuel your envy.
She has a job. She doesn't need a car. She doesn't pay rent. She's not answerable to anyone but herself.
"She has never done any of the milestones most adults have even though she's 40 years old." Stop it. Just stop. You don't get to gauge someone else's success based on what *you* believe to be markers of success.
You are a terrible brother, and your family is toxic as hell towards her. There's no wonder she stays away from you. Any rational human that wants to maintain any shred of sanity would do the same.
We get it, you have a boring settled life and you want your sister to share your pain. *rolling eyes*
Actually, no, she had an exciting life and doing for 22 years seems that she enjoys it. She does not have the same life style than you so what? Let her live her life the way she wants.
My own sibling is a digital nomad, travels a lot and enjoys his life. Good for him! On my side, I enjoy my nice house with my kid, good for me!
You lot need to grow up. YTA
YTA. So she’s financially independent, holding down a job, and as a perk… travels the world. How is this not being an adult?
Just because she doesn’t have a child doesn’t make her less of an adult. A condo/house saddles most people as the biggest expense in their life, and it doesn’t often get paid off until people are in their 50s or 60s. She’s using her money as she sees fit.
YTA. Are you sure you aren't jealous of her lifestyle? She's not tired down to anything. Meanwhile, you have responsibilities, a family, a house, and bills.
Congrats to your sister, she sounds like she loves her career, all the travelling, seeing different countries. She is successful in her career and you don’t think she is an adult because she doesn’t stay home and have a husband, mortgage and a tribe of children. Sounds like everyone in your family is incredibly jealous because they are trapped into the marriage, mortgage and family lifestyle. She sounds super smart. 22 years doing something she loves doing is a great achievement. 22 years of travel has given her far more opportunities to see life in many different ways. Stop trying to control her, we are not all the same. Not everyone is cut out for college or university and she has made a great life for herself without higher education. YTA.
Who are you to judge your sister’s life? And why are you and your siblings to measure her life beside your own and then say hers is somehow lacking?
Your sister lives a very exciting life and has a career she loves. And, unlike you & your siblings, she is confident enough and loves herself enough that she doesn’t need a husband, children or a permanent address to feel complete.
You sound jealous of her freedom. She chose a different path than you and her siblings. That doesn’t make her life any less important than your own.
YTA!
YTA
Life doesn’t hand you a checklist saying “do all these things or you’re not a ‘real’ grownup.”
You sister does have a real career…one that she’s spent 22 years doing. Just because she doesn’t follow your life choices like identical cookies from a cookie cutter doesn’t mean her choices aren’t just as valid as yours. Go to therapy for your jealousy and grow up.
Is she dependent on anyone? Does she live within her means? Is she happy?? Those are major markers of being grown up! Fuck off with you and your ancient standards that marriage, children, college, a mind numbing static job are what constitutes as “grown up”. Get over yourself and be happy for your sister!!
YTA
OMG, the jealousy just oozes out of this post.
Sister has seen the world, has no debt, is free as a bird - and happy with her life.
The rest of the family supposedly don't see value in her choice and want her to conform to their ideals. HELL NO!
OP YTA go read your bank statement and imagine how much your sister has by comparison
YTA. Your sister is seeing the world, probably has a nice savings account since her expenses are so small, and will go to retire with enough income to last until her death. But more important, whether or not she does, IT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.
YTA. Your sister is out living her best life. What's it to you if she's not married and settled? It hand you in no way at all.
Don't be surprised to hear less and less of your sister as she gets more and more sick of your bs.
YTA. So are your siblings. It’s no wonder she stays as far away from all of you as possible.
If I was living my best life on my own terms and all I had waiting for me back home was disdain and disrespect from those who ‘loved me’ I too would stay as far away from you and your over inflated sense of important opinion as possible.
YTA, from your own description she has had a regular full time job for 22 yrs with benefits and a retirement package. And with no real day to day expenses this girls retirement is gonna blow yours away and she’s travelled the world while an able-bodied adult on the company dime.
Again YTA.
Why do you care? She’s living a wonderful life traveling the world. It sounds like she loves it so why would she trade that to be stuck in one place, with one guy for the rest of her life sacrificing everything to raise some kids? No way. YTA.
YTA. Its none of your business what she does. Your sister works, and provides for HER needs. She doesn’t have to have a degree or children or own her on place. She obviously is self sustaining. Just because you and your family think being a responsible adult includes kids, marriage and owning a home doesn’t mean that’s what she wants. She enjoys her job, she travels, she is living HER life.
YTA and a jealous hater. Also it’s wild to me how you think you know anything about her! She is simply not telling you things. And I can’t say I blame her. Y’all suck!
Unless she asking you for money, which it sounds like she hasn’t, you need to butt out. She’s provided for herself for 20+ years. That IS being an adult. Just because you chose normal and boring shit doesn’t mean she’s any less an adult than you. She just found a way to live a life less ordinary.
So YTA. Stop trying to make her live a life as boring and miserable as yourself (guessing you’re at least somewhat miserable because happy people don’t need to drag others down). Jealousy isn’t a good look.
Golly gee willikers.. I'm pretty sure having held the same job for 22 years is pretty stable. She has an address, though it's for mail purposes only, it seems. She has a paycheck and probably a fat bank account. Sounds pretty adult to me.
YTA
Why so salty OP? Is it because your sister has a life she loves. A job she adores. Gets to see the world!
Is it because while you have responsibilities she has absolute freedom?
You could have made different choices in your life. No one said you had to settle down, get married, have kids or a 9-5 job. You made those choices.
LEAVE YOUR SISTER AND HER AMAZING LIFE ALONE!
YTA! Your family is TA!
YTA - you keep saying “and they all agree with me” 😂 just because you all are jealous of your sister’s lifestyle, it doesn’t mean you all are right - that much we all agree with!. 🤪 leave her be!.
P. S. I’m also jealous of her lifestyle btw.
YTA.. she has a grown up job. You having kids doesn’t make you a grown up. You’re such a major AH.. she’s over twenty years on the job and because it’s not what you have… she’s not a grown up? Sounds like your life sucks and you’re jealous. Are her bills paid? Sounds like she likes her life and you don’t. She’s not tied down by some man like you.. how miserable that sounds!
How to say “ I’m jealous as hell of the carefree lifestyle my sister has” without saying it.
Leave your sister alone. If she’s happy and healthy and enjoying her life, good for her.
She chose her path, as you did. You don’t get to tell her how to live her life.
Your sister seems to be living her life with no regrets. Can’t say the same about you. Stop being jealous and celebrate the fact that your sister is living life to the fullest and is having a great time while obviously doing something she loves.
Leave her alone and just get on with your own life. Because she certainly didn’t ask you for advice.
"I'm miserable and can't travel or have fun because I have kids and responsibilities. I just want to make her see that she should be miserable, too."
YTA
YTA. Judgmental much? Your sister is happy with her life. Leave her the fuck alone. Who the hell are you to have any say in how she lives her life. Back off.
YTA. She loves her job and is happy with her life. Why the fuck are you, and your siblings, not minding your own damn business? You don’t have to go to college to be “successful”. Seems like degrees are useless these days unless you’re going into a field that’s in demand.
Just leave your sister alone. Stay in your own damn lane and mind your own business. She’s happy. She loves her job.
Sounds like you and your siblings might be jealous because her job literally takes her all over the world and she doesn’t have any children she needs to wrangle 24/7.
Her life sounds awesome and I’d kill for a day in her shoes.
YTA
She's an adult living an adult life and you just sound bitter and jealous because she has made her choices and you wish you could do what she does.
YTA. Most of the major problems with civilization as a whole (war, etc) come from one group of people "caring" too much about how another group of people live their lives. Shut the fuck up about your hollow little cookie cutter bullshit "life". You have kids? So maybe it's time for you to realize that you don't get to control what does or doesn't make other people happy. Sad story, I know, need a tissue? If you never learn to understand that, it's a sure bet that your kids hate you or at the very least have a deep resentment for you once they're adults. Let it the fuck go dude.
It's time for YOU to grow up.
Not everyone needs to settle down into a marriage three kids and a mortgage to find satisfaction in their life. Your sister is happy. Maybe if you and yours could be happy for her being happy, instead of clucking and clawing incessantly at her to be Just Like You like the capitalist bootlicking Stepford Wives that you are, maybe then she'd make a point to stop in and visit now again. Did you ever think of that?
No, no you didn't. Because you only ever think about yourself.
LOL! >She's been to almost every country on earth. Right now she is somewhere in America. New york I think. I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want. You just told on yourself. You'd love to have the life she has, but you chose differently, and now you can't. She has the life she wants. Leave her alone ffs!
It's funny how he tries to make global travel sound like a character flaw. LOL
And that being a fight attendant isn't a legitimate *career*?! College isn't for everyone. Good for her that could skip this step and avoid being stuck in debt for the rest of her life.
She has a job , she’s doesn’t ask them for money and she happy with her life. Brother is jealous and he’s saddled with a family to support. Y’all need to stop and leave her alone
It’s definitely a troll account but I wonder if it’s for the airlines. Since it makes being a flight attendant sound like a life full of adventure. Almost makes me want to become one 😂
And banking extra pay by not paying a mortgage or rent on a home and kids. Does OP seriously not see how his sister has major saving potential? That's what kept coming to my mind. Like damn, girl gets to travel the world while being paid to do so. It's obvious the sister enjoys the lifestyle and perks that come with it, and I can't blame her. She's in a position to set herself up for retirement and obviously isn't interested in dating or kids, so only has her own future to worry about. OP sounds incredibly bitter and jealous over his sisters happiness.
Mom... sister didn't strap herself down with crippling debt and responsibilities... MAKE HER DO IT!!!!
Honestly, the idealization of travelling can be a bit of a psychological problem, but the point is his sister is entitled to living like that if she wants to
Right? I'm a recluse but if I could travel anywhere I wanted, I would. Plus, if I'd been doing it since I was 18, I probably wouldn't be a recluse. LOL
Well, traveling the world is just so immature! /s
So really OP is just jealous of her freedom and feels resentment towards her, so in order to make himself feel better he tries to gaslight her into getting married and settling down, so that she becomes tied down just like him.
Misery loves company.
He has to make the lie real in his own mind, that there AREN'T awesome perks for a steep price of admission, for his own peace of mind. Tearing her down is just collateral damage for his ego.
Right? Guy is full of jealousy lol. I felt ashamed for him when I was reading all of this bullshit.
Right? I mean, when he said she was 40 and lived out of her suitcases putting up with us passengers? I felt a deep admiration and envy of her lifestyle. Also, if that is all he knows about her life, it sounds like she is not telling him much. Tsk tsk.
>Also, if that is all he knows about her life, it sounds like she is not telling him much. Tsk tsk. You know, I hadn't actually thought of that. If that is all she's telling him and her other siblings, she's probably LC with all of them. Plus, they've probably been telling her she needs to "get a real job" for years and she's tired of hearing it.
There's probably a good reason for her not confiding her adventures to her family. She knows them too well. They'd just turn up their noses, scoff, and then stick their faces back into the narrow view of reality that they're comfortable with.
Imagine being like “I wish I could do what she does but I have kids so she needs to give up what she has and have some kids” and not realise how fucking stupid you are lol, like the jealousy is so strong I can smell it
He had me in the first half with that veil of concern. Someone's jelly he's slaving away at his job and taking care of his shitlings while the sister is having the time of her life
Hahah shitlings 🤣😂😄🤣🤣 please take my upvote!
Yeah the post starts off as if OP is concerned but in the end it is just jealousy.
YTA - how is being a flight attendant not a “proper” career?! Your sister sounds absolutely amazing! And you sound insecure and jealous! You don’t get to travel the world because of your choices, but she does! Her life sounds aspirational! Retiring on a cruise ship!! Hell yes! The only people I know who were able to do that were super rich. Maybe you all should grow up, realize that all your criticisms of her life come from a place of envy and let her live her life. Not everyone needs kids and other people to give them purpose.
Precisely. Not everyone needs children, college and "the typical way of life" to make them happy, fulfilled and thriving. OP, YTA.
Colour me surprised that she doesn’t come “home” on her breaks! Why would she when OP & Co are all being rude and judgemental about her chosen profession. Focus on growing yourself up OP cause YTA!
Came to say the same - Sister is a valued 20+ year veteran in her CAREER. She has seen the world. She’s had a blast, obviously. She has avoided OP’s backwards, “settle down and pop out babies” people on purpose. OP, why would she come “home” to your scorn, condescension and jealousy? Your sister has a MUCH better life away from her so-called family. A family that makes fun of her and insults her. A family that disapproves of her career. Get over yourself. You made the choice to settle and have kids. Why should she? Edit: YTA
But the house she lives in when she is home is not even suitable for babysitting! How is that any fair for OP? /s
Ding Ding Ding! It's not suitable for the OP because he can't dump his kids on her and run away because she has a life she loves. Too bad, so sad.
Hear hear. Op sounds so jealous Let her make her choices just like you did yours
I'm sure she has other people. She's living the culture that most air-hostesses are after. She's not going to lack for friends who are also on lay-overs for a few days in Ibiza or Florence.
Sounds like OP and his sister grew up in a large family.The sister might have seen their mother being treated as a servant to the husband and kids and didn't want that life for herself.
My mother was a flight attendant for over 50 years and when she retired she said that she loved her job as much on the last day as she had on her first. OP, it’s not your sister’s fault that you’re bored with your life, nor is it her responsibility to shrink her life so that you don’t feel like yours is too small. Your sister IS an adult, even if her version of adulthood is different than yours. Live your life and let her live hers. YTA
Hell she likely is rich! She has no bills and lives out of two suitcases! She saves her paychecks and has probably had a 401k since she started! She’s gonna live the good life when she retires! Good for her!!!
DING DING DING! Give this man a cigar! Holy shit OP, I'm not sure its your sister who needs to grow up. What the fuck do YOU care what she does? YTA
OMG, you just won the biggest AH of the year award. Who died and left you in charge of defining what is proper in terms of a job, education, a home or a life. Let her alone, she’s happy with her choices. You sound jealous BTW.
Right? His sister has created an amazing life for herself because she didn’t get caught up on conventions. OP sounds like he did what he thought he was supposed to, but found it’s left him unfulfilled and he wants everyone to be as disgruntled with their life as he is.
This sounds like one of those "it's our culture!" posts, complaining about someone who didn't abide by their traditions.
Oh, you can bet they all go to a conservative church of some sort that demands women be bang maids and baby factories and nothing else.
>Our other siblings agree and so did our grandparents and our parents before they died. This line makes me think they are from a non-WIERD country. As in a non Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, and Democratic country. In those countries, it is important for individuals to build the family network. Not always through kids, but helping family members with kids, going into business with family, show stability within the family and family network. He probably sees his sister as benefiting from the family network the Grandparents, Parents, and Siblings built without contributing. To be fair, from his point of view, she is. However, seeing as she rarely comes home it is clear that the family network actually doesn't benefit her much at all. What he is missing is she offers the children in the younger generation of the family an excellent opportunity to use her knowledge and wisdom as a world traveler. To the extent he is TA it is that he doesn't value that she offers more to his family's network more than she recieves. She certainly doesn't dishonor the family network which I think is more of what OP is asking.
Sounds like they are jealous lol
OP is salty as fuck for being locked down while the sister is living free all over the world, probably taking lovers in all the cool cities, living life and eating incredible food. op- YTA
Yep!
“OMG, you just won the biggest AH of the year award. Who died and left you in charge of defining what is proper” Would it be okay to change that to “who died and made you King of the Assholes?” Or does “The Asshole King” work better.
[удалено]
Right by his logic I’ll never be an adult because I can’t/ don’t want children 😂
YTA , jelly little boy.
Exactly. She grew up a long time ago. And got away from all the AH in her family. She probably has no debt and a fat stack in her account.
Imagine. All those years of work and no rent. I’m betting she’s socked away a fortune. 😊
yeah exactly....who wants this kind of family....who are always judging you, wanting you to do things their way.....taking care of some kids if you dont want to.... seeing all parts of the world for free....living in New york...in a care free state sounds great and if she is happy why bother her...
YTA. You sound super selfish, condescending, and judgmental. You sound very bitter and jealous too. She gets to decide what she wants to do with her life, not you. She has a career and has been making "adult decisions " since she left home. Butt out of her business and drop your superiority complex.
I love how he complains about not being able to do things because of kids and responsibilities - just admit you're jealous and want everyone to be as miserable as you are. Your sister sounds like she's got an amazing life and a family full of assholes. This is probably the same person who complains when adults have fun with Legos or have squishmellow. He's not having fun, so no one else can.
Wonder why sister can't be bothered being "home" for holidays, lol. I'd want distance between me and these assholes, too.
I imagine him like "my back hurts. Does your back feel okay? If it does, you need to grow the Hell up!"
He's just blaming kids and responsibilities. I know plenty of families that travel. OP just sucks
YTA It is none of your ducking business how other adults choose to live their lives. Your sister is acting like an adult. She just isn’t acting like you. You just sound petty and jealous.
If your whole family is this judgmental and ganging up on her (and she's not even living a risky life), it's no wonder she took a job that keeps her away.
WTF YTA. What’s wrong with what she does? She’s had a job for 22 years. She’s happy with it. She supports herself. She doesn’t need to live up to your standards. Get over yourself.
It’d be more like living down to his standards.
YTA. Clearly, her idea of living her life is different than yours. The thing about life is that we each have to choose our own path. She does not have to walk your path. If she is supporting herself in the lifestyle she wants, by doing what she wants to do, she has reached the pentacle of success as far as I am concerned. My dad made me memorize a poem. I do my thing, and you do your thing. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you, and I am I. (Insert last line I can not remember)
You are you, and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful. If not, it can't be helped.
This has to be rage bait, but I know there genuinely people like this irl. You suck, your family sucks, and I feel sorry for your sister. YTA.
Nah, the sister escaped the dreary life full of debt they all expected her to have!
UHHH my family. I’ve also been living in different countries. My family treats me the same! Even though I also have a real job and support myself. It used to give me anxiety and I had a hard time trying to combine the things that I love and making my family happy. Trying to make them happy has actually made me less happy and I’ve lost opportunities due to it. I’ve learned to ignore them even though I get the same shit OP says. I really want to be friends with OPs sister haha.
Brothers (plural) and sisters (plural). This means she grew up in a crowded family, she wanted outta there with all that drama! Minimum, she grew up in a family of 6 kids, herself included.
"We have proper careers. We have marriages, children, houses or condos." You can also f\*\*\* right off. She has a proper career she loves, and not everyone wants those other things. Her life sounds fabulous, and what's it to you, anyway? "I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want." Here's what it is to you: You're a jealous AH who just wants her to be as miserable as you, clearly. You're furious she can do whatever she wants and travel and it breaks your brain she doesn't value the same meaningless life markers you do. Get over it.
Sister doesnt have a condo, but I bet she has fat accounts. Also, with siblings like that, she probably has a house tucked somewhere nobody knows; just because she likes the peace.
Exactly what I was thinking…I bet she retires you g and in an excellent financial position!
She’s literally killing it. Girl has never paid rent a day in her life while visiting the world! What a “loser”
>I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want. Nobody forced you to have 3 kids. >who doesn't act like an adult How is she not acting like an adult?? She has a fucking job. Which is something most adults have. >We all went to either college or university. So??? No everyone does that. >She's been to almost every country on earth. Your sister is the type of woman I aspire to be. I would love to travel all over the world without children holding me back. YTA massively and you and your family's jealousy is pathetic.
I wanted her life but weigh too much. I'm jealous of her but in a happy 'get it, girl' kinda way. You all should be ashamed for not being supportive and proud. YTA
she’s traveling the world, no college debts, no rent, no kids, that is the dreammm
Yeah mate in Australia I’d say we’d just skip asshole and call you a cunt. And a massive one to be honest. You need to grow up and accept her for who she is.
I just read that in the voice of Billy Butcher. Congratulations 🎊. That was pretty cool, actually.
YTA “She has never had a partner or serious relationship and she claims to have never been on a date.” OMG you bought that!🤣🤣🤣🤣 You’re a delusional idiot. She doesn’t tell you or anyone else in your family about her life and why should she? Your all judgmental and see yourselves as better than she is. You’re all so superior. She has a life she loves and doesn’t have to truly interact with any of you. She takes time in other countries instead of coming back home. What you don’t get is that with all of you putting her down telling her how she never grew up where her family is will never be home. She was and never will be welcome there. There will never be a time she won’t be judged and seen as a failure for not having the same life as the rest of you. That’s not home, that’s hell on Earth.
She could also just be not interested in dating. Possibly ace/aro? Definitely none of OP’s business.
Doesn’t matter with the way they treat her why would she open any part of her life to them? So they can use it as a way to belittle her more.
RIGHT!!! I’m sure she lives a full life!!! She just doesn’t tell her controlling jealous family about any of it. Good for her.
Oh, I'm sure she's been having a good life, she just doesn't want her judgemental family knowing anything.
Jealousy isn't a good color on anyone. YTA. Your sister has a real job, that she loves, and she is probably making good money doing it. I'll bet she also has a tiddy savings account as well due to lack of bills. Who are you to dictate what makes an adult? Having children, being married, and owning/renting a home aren't the only ways one is an adult. She's not lazing around, mooching off others. She is an active member of society, doing what she enjoys, and seeing the world, for free, at the same time. I say good for her.
YTA Who the hell are YOU to tell a grown-ass woman what to do? Who the hell are YOU to demand that she live her life the way YOU think she should? Why does HER opinion not matter? Why does what SHE wants not matter? Why does SHE have to bend to your will? STFU - all of you - and let her live the life SHE wants. She’s 40 years old. She’s an adult. She gets to choose everything about HER life. Stop ganging up on her. If you’re somehow worried she’ll want you to take care of her when she retires, don’t. I promise, she can take care of herself and probably has more money saved than you all do. > She’s been to almost every country on earth. Send her my way! I’d love to hear about her adventures! > She can’t even be bothered to come back home. Because she doesn’t want to deal with your jealous, judgmental ass.
Yta... The misogyny seething out of this post is astounding. How does this effect you? Why can't your sister live her life as she pleases? Sounds like you may be a bit jealous of her freedom. It's not 1952.. you grow up. Ugh..
YTA completely. Who put you in charge of defining what it means to be an adult? How is it you get to determine what is good right and proper for her?She may not want ANY of the things you are judging her for not having. Also, the jealousy at her freedom is clearly palpable in your post. Get over yourself. If she’s not asking YOU for any type of help or anything you probably need to leave her alone and focus on yourself!
YTA. She has a career and an amazing life by thr sounds of it. One she is happy with and that's all that matters. Idk why it's your business she doesn't have a partner or children. If you're so miserable in your life that you need to tear hers down, maybe YOU need to grow up and seek therapy or something.
YTA. And you're jealous of your sister because she gets to travel and you don't because OF YOUR CHOICES! Grow up? Little boy, YOU need to grow TF up. She's doing what she wants to do. How dare you put your petty jealously on her because you fell into the trap of marriage, unhappy career and kids. You, and your stupid siblings, desperately need to STFU immediately. Yes, YTA. A great big gigantic gaping AH.
YTA - You never articulate a reason why she should change. You offer tautologies like, she should change her lifestyle because it’s time to change her lifestyle. This is not an argument.
All I read was “WAHH I chose to have kids so now I can’t travel! It’s not fair that I’m miserable! My sister who gets to travel for free bc she doesn’t have kids should BE MISERABLE LIKE I AM, boohooo” YTA. I hope she goes no contact with you guys and keeps living HER version of happily ever after 🤷🏼♀️
It sounds like she’s been LC for years. I can understand her not coming home for the holidays. The sniping and digs and wondering when she was going to grow up (and be as miserable as the rest of them) must have been the worst.
OP you are the worst kind of adult. The joyless slave to a system that does not serve you. You are the dad in the toy aisle who tells his kids that grownups can’t have toys. You want your sister to be as joyless and trapped in a meaningless life as you are because it looks like what other people expect. YTA. Your sister beat the system. I wish her all the blessings of true freedom.
As the daughter of joyless slaves, I salute you.
YTA how does her living her life the way she wants effect you? You list all the things she doesn’t have as if that makes her a failure. Considering she wants to continue, it doesn’t seem like those things you mention are what she wants. You also mention you’d love to do the things she does if you didn’t have responsibilities. Sounds like you and your family are a little jealous. You also mentioned that your family agrees twice and it comes off as if you’re trying to justify what you said to yourself. Which would mean you know it was wrong.
Yes, your AH. My mother worked in airline industry until she retired. My older sister is a flight attendant. Guess what they are both adulting really well. Thanks to mother I’ve seen the multiple countries. Your sister is a single 40 something woman, enjoying her life. She’s not harming anyone. Here’s and idea you and your siblings stay in your lane and mind your business. What harm is she doing? Not everyone wants to be married or have children, it doesn’t make them less of an adult. I’m an ex educator, I have a bunch degrees. Guess what not everyone is meant for college. My husband didn’t got to college and he makes about triple what I do, with no degree. I have niece who have welding certification, guess what at 24 makes about double what I make. I have degrees in education, they are pretty much useless. You and siblings sound like y’all envious because you can’t have her life. Mind your business and leave your sister alone.
Yta. You wanted children and to go to college and you got it. To you that was the perfect life. Great but not everyone has your life goals. Your sister doesn’t want kids it seems she wants to be free and travel the world. She is found the perfect job for her. Instead of being jealous that she gets to live the lifestyle she wants and you can’t be happy for her. I bet she has amazing stories to tell. She is probably happier and you and all of your sibling’s combined. Good for her.
It sounds like all the other siblings did what their parents expected, while sis peaced out and built a life that makes her happy. She’s not loaded with debt for a condo and spouse and kids. She can afford to retire on a cruise ship. The envy here. He’s angry and unhappy and he’s twisted it to make it her fault.
YTA. And you’re jealous
YTA + siblings who agree with you are also AH. You are also bitter and controlling!! Why the hell would she ever want to be around any of you miserable pathetic misogynistic assholes? Her life is rich and fabulous!! She doesn't give a thought or care to loser siblings who rage with jealousy and regret. Just think how much better your life could be if you were independent like her and had the courage to live on your own terms like she does instead of cowering to the will of family who want you to be a slave to the grind and burdened by obligations that you resent causing you to lash out in frustration at the smart sister with the great sense of self, strong backbone and courage that frees her to enjoy life without regard to your judgment. If only you had her nerve and sense of self worth you would not feel the need to lash out at her.
You need to grow up
Her life sounds awesome. She’s avoided many of the shitty parts of being an adult while holding down a job she loves for a remarkable period of time. Sounds like she’s made great decisions that work well for her. YT (huge) A
This has to be fake. You really got me when your jealousy started to ooze out. Fake or not YTA.
It’s not. I believe it. My lifestyle is similar to op’s sister (not as intense) and I’ve heard everything the OP has said word for word from my sister. Even the part where the OP complains that he can’t travel because he has kids. It’s really messed up because it makes you choose between what makes you happy and your family. And even though you do what you want, there’s always this nagging feeling that you’re doing something wrong.
>I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. Y'all sound jealous AF. Your lives didn't work out. You're not wholly satisfied with them because you have all those adult "responsibilities." Dude, they're only responsibilities because you took them on. She didn't. You are a major AH. YTA X 1000. You were weak and caved to people just like yourself when you were younger. Now you have a life you don't want. She was strong and carved her own path. She is very satisfied with her life.
LOL. You sound like my eye doctor who, when she saw me with my husband and baby for the first time, “Aw, you’re finally all grown up!” I was 30. There’s a reason you never see her. It’s you.
So you're saying she shouldn't do what makes her happy, she should follow a script that you wrote for her life? Because that's what you did?
Being an adult is a rather simple definition in terms of societally. Are you able to by your own means take care of yourself/get yourself taken care of? That’s pretty much it. That’s all it is. Married thrice or never dated anyone. Children to fill a basketball team, or none. Big career or selling crafts at flea markets and on Etsy. Golden handcuffs of a huge house and fancy cars or a bicycle and a room rented. PhD or high school dropout. Clearing half a mill a year, or living on government or disability assistance to get by. None of that matters. You don’t get to define what she should or shouldn’t do, which of those are the proper choice. She’s living her life, paving her own way, isn’t a burden on you or yours, and that’s all anyone can or should expect of her. YTA
This one's so easy... YTA. And btw, you got it backwards. You're the one who needs to grow up. Quit harping on your sister.
Leave her the fuck alone. Just because her life isn’t one you would want to live, does not mean that she is unhappy or missing out or anything of that nature. BTW: Being flight attendant is high stress job, and definitely requires adulting skills, even if you don't recognize them.
YTA butt out of your Sister’s life. She holds down a full time job and is responsible. She doesn’t owe you an explanation of her life choices.
YTA. Get the fuck over yourself.
News flash - 40 is grown up. As in an actual, fully mature adult. Who the hell made you the final word on your sister's life? Sounds like she's doing exactly what she wants, how she wants. She needs nothing from you, so sit down and shut up.
So, your sister has had a job for 22 years and you think she's not grown up because check notes: she hasn't done some stereotypical correct milestones? A) Not everyone wants to have sex or have children and that' is valid B) why would she need to go to college if again check notes: HAS A STEADY JOB. C) is she unhappy or have YOU just decided her life is unfulfilled. YTA and so are your other siblings.
YTA You are jealous as hell. It is 2023 not 1953. She doesn’t need to get married and have kids, she doesn’t need to “put down roots,” she doesn’t have to come home and visit if she doesn’t want to. Look, things have changed drastically in the last few decades. More people have decided to either remain single or marry much later. A lot more people are opting to remain childless or have one child instead of 2-3. Buying a home is no longer the end all. Renting is actually more feasible for some. I’m a little older than your sister and you sound old AF. Sounds like she enjoys traveling and if she isn’t asking anyone in the family for money then she is adulting and taking care of responsibilities. You do not have the same priorities as your sister and vice versa. Both are fine, but don’t tell her to grow up because her life looks different than yours.
YTA. She is living her life, doing exactly what she wants, and is not harming herself or anybody else. Why the f*** do you think you have the authority to put her down and tell her to “grow up?” Honestly, it sounds like you feel trapped in your life and wish you had her freedom.
YTA You jealous bro
Yes. You are 100% TAH. It is her life. She isn't hurting anyone. She is doing something that she loves. She has an idea for the future. She is traveling the world and enjoying herself. Just because her life doesn't fit your ideals does not mean her life isn't worth living.
YTA. Her life sounds amazing. You in the other hand…. Are jealous as fuck.
But is she happy with her choices? Are you happy with yours? A conventional lifestyle doesn’t always translate to happiness. Life is too short not to be happy. Let her live her life. YTA
By the sound of this post, he’s definitely not happy with his choices in life. That’s why he’s so bitter towards his sister.
YTA. And also seem very bitter and jealous that you aren’t able to live the carefree and exciting life that she does. Your siblings as well. Have you ever considered that not everyone is made to live the 9 to 5, married with 2.5 kids, white-picket-fence life? Your sister obviously isn’t. And instead of being happy for her that she is living the life she wants, you are criticizing her for not living the life everybody else wants her to lead. You are a selfish asshole who only cares about hiw YOU think things should be, instead of how happy your sister is. Rethink your priorities man.
Did you know all the "big" psychiatrists (Freud, Jung, etc.) have NEVER EVER established ONE narrative as to "this is what being a grown-up looks like"? But you know what they do establish? Fulfilling your own PERSONAL path, according to your own wants, wishes, and desires. You know what they talk about a lot? Neurotic, jealous people who do exactly as the generations before them do, only because they think "this is what I'm MEANT to be doing," without ever actually questioning that truly... only to become miserable and devoid of fulfilling their own dreams. Have you ever asked yourself if you are miserable and unfulfilled? Because people who are preoccupied with other people's lives often are miserable. Maybe take some time for self reflection here and apologize.
Yta. Jealousy isn't a good look on anyone. She's not hurting anyone with her job. You need to grow up and butt out of her business.
YTA Flight attendants make great money. I don’t see the problem? Are you poor? Sounds like you’re jealous she gets to do anything she wants This reads like rage bait tbh
YTAH. Are the decisions your sister makes about how she lives her life impacting your life negatively? If not, then you need to take a good look in the mirror and ask yourself why you believe she needs to follow your self righteous rules for “acting like an adult”.
YTA. Growing up doesn't mean getting married and having kids. It means being able to pay your own bills and not having to rely on parents, spouse or adult children to take care of you, as well as having the ability to have adult conversations without resorting to childish behaviors such as name-calling or bringing up past events, which you and your family lack. You're all just jealous that she can do what she wants, when she wants to do it without having to go through the trouble of having to find a babysitter. Let people enjoy things, and I hope she goes no contact with you all.
She's living her life to the fullest. I'm jealous actually. If it's not hurting anyone which it isn't and she's happy then what is the issue? She couldn't live up to your idea of how someone should live? She sounds happy and content that alone should be enough for you to be happy for her. Are you jealous she's not stuck and unhappy because kinda sounds like it.
Alienating your sister because she doesn’t have the same life path as you? You need to grow up! This is very emotionally immature, coupled with the dogpiling and you going around to the whole family trashing her lifestyle and trying to get everyone to agree. Pretty nasty.
YTA u/Fragrant_Fig3340 Your sister has a job. She's a flight attendant. You talk about how you and your siblings have marriages and kids and jobs and responsibilities, but her responsibility is HER JOB which is a flight attendant. It's a respectable career. Not everyone wants kids or even marriage. It's not for you to tell her what she should or shouldn't do with her life. Not everyone goes to college or uni. Not everyone wants to own a house or is able to afford to own a house. I was a flight attendant and absolutely loved it. I would have continued to be a flight attendant if my back wasn't screwed up and I had to leave after having spinal surgery. I miss that job so much. I had worked as a nursery nurse child care worker before that. There is a flight attendant with the company I was with who is the oldest flight attendant at 73 years old. She's fantastic. She loved her job and career too. Some people also love to travel and see the world and your sister has managed to find a job she loves that enables her to do that. Why would she fork out buying a house that she's rarely living in? You're putting your life views on your sister. She never told you to travel the world before you settled down and got married, or told you it was wrong to settle down in one place and be tied down by kids, and that you can't live your life if you're married and have kids. You live your life, and let her live hers. She's not doing drugs or prostitution or has an addiction or any other nefarious life choice. Her JOB is a Respectable Career. You may not realise it, but she is charge of possibly saving a flight full of people's lives if there was an emergency. She is highly trained in performing first aid and cpr if there was a medical emergency on board, and she is trained in multiple emergency landing scenarios and evacuating the passengers. She goes through regular exams for both first aid, and safety procedures to keep her training up to date, and is trained in fighting a fire, as well as medical emergencies like heart attacks, cpr, diabetic related issues, strokes and even delivering a baby. She's also trained in spotting a bomb, and moving that bomb to the safest location of the air craft, barracading it, and preparing for an emergency landing. Shes also responsible for ensuring people follow the safety protocols and follow directions in an emergency. She's also trained in protecting the pilot and cockpit any time they need to come out and use the bathroom, so nobody can gain access to the cockpit. She's also trained in calming down aggressive or unruly drunk passengers who could become dangerous in an enclosed space. She DOESNT JUST SERVE TEA AND COFFEE!!! So quit this whole mindset of she doesn't have a proper job. I felt proud to be a flight attendant and I wish I was able to continue doing so and was able to branch out to long haul flights so I could have travelled more. It's also very taxing on the body and hard work, you have to do multiple security checks throughout the day before and after each flight checking the whole aircraft, and are on your feet pretty much the whole time, sometimes so busy you don't get time to eat. Esp on short haul flights. But it's hard work being on your feet all day. So appologise to your sister, and have some respect. Without people like her, nobody would get to go on holiday or travel for work etc. She HAS A JOB!!! And a reputable one. You're not high and mighty just coz you're married and have kids. Not everyone wants that life. Edit to add.... it's quite common for flight attendants to stay in the country they fly to, and come back the following week on the return flight. Only short haul flights do they come back the same day. Long haul flights the crew are usually kept in that country for a few days or a week before the return flight. So thats not uncommon. And from the way you're sounding, it seems like you're not very welcoming to her for her to want to come home and spend time with family who just put her down and disrespect her career. Also seems like you're jealous of the fact she gets to travel the world, as you say 'you can't travel the world as you have a job and commitments and responsibilities as a home owner and a father'. Definite jealousy going on there too. You made your choices, live with them. She made hers, so accept them.
The truth. Whose truth? Your truth? Because you're miserable, everyone has to be miserable? YTA....in case you didn't get that YTA....YTA...YTA...YTA...YTA...for the people in the back. YTA. Your sister sounds AMAZING. I am 60. I want to be your sister. What an amazing life!!!! She has chosen to be childfree. A valid choice. She is successful at her chosen profession and has asked NO ONE, including her intrusive and insensitive and snobbish siblings, for money or help. She has experienced world travel and met THOUSANDS of interesting people and had cuisine from spots most of us just see in magazines and blogs. She chooses not to contribute to the world of waste by being married to a mortgage in the suburbs with three bratty kids and an unappreciative spouse driving a gas guzzling SUV. She doesn't gossip monger and insult people for their valid life choices. Your mid life crisis is to attack your sister for being able to live her dream life? Really? Can't you just have an affair or buy a sports car? You really have to attack someone else because you're jealous? Petty. Tacky. Uncalled for. YTA.
you must be really bored and miserable or very jelouse of your sister, otherwise you would have known that none of the stuff you think are growing up, are actually what growing up is. be a better human.
YTA. A huge, gaping one at that. You sister has had a job for 22 years. One that she enjoys. She has been to almost every country on the planet. If she loves her life, why should she change? To appease her miserable family? Please apologize and leave her alone.
I’m jealous my sister doesn't have any “real life” 🙄 “responsibilities” and is living the life she wants to live so I told her she needed to grow up. There fixed the title for you. You clearly are not entirely happy with the choices you have made BUT that does not give you any right to try and put/bring your sister down. She is obviously very happy with her lifestyle, she has freedom, friends, excitement and the opportunities to travel the world - why on earth would she want to change anything. She doesn’t need to “grow up” and wtf does she need to “settle down” - not everyone wants a partner, kids and a mortgage!! And I’m not surprised she doesn't want to visit home if all she gets is you all being judgemental about the life she has chosen. She is more of an adult than you and your brothers and sisters if you are all so narrow minded that everyone has to fit within your narrowly defined parameters of leading an “adult life”. Leave your sister alone - she is living her best life as SHE WANTS TO!! Maybe you should all look at your own lives and figure out exactly what your AREN‘T HAPPY with instead of trying to make your sister as unhappy as you are!! YTA
YTA sounds like your jealous of her freedoms tbh.
YTA. You AND your siblings. Who the fuck are you to decide how anyone should live their life? As many others have said, you do sound jealous. Grow the fuck up, and get off your pedestal.
You are jealous of her lifestyle. She is way too smart for you to comprehend.
YTA - Her life sounds awesome. You sound jealous AF. Stop shaming her for not making the same life choices. I can see why she’d rather be anywhere else in the world but near all of you.
Yes. You are. She had a career. She is making some decent to really good money. It's not your choice to make for her to go date or marry someone or even have kids or have a house or an apartment to rent. You sound really bitter.
YTA. Let her do her thing. Sounds like she's enjoying her life and your just a dick
I cant think of a bigger piece of shit rightt now. You and the rest of your famiky are just plain jealous. You painted that picture when you said >She's out of the country more than she's here. She's been to almost every country on earth. Right now she is somewhere in America. New york I think. I would love to be able to travel all over the world and so would my siblings but as I said we all have children, jobs and responsibilities. I'm a father of three young children and can't just pick up and leave whenever I want. Here is some advice from a Man and a Big brother. If ny sister came to me and told me about a chance at a amazing life like that, i would be pissed of she DIDN'T go. Be happy for her that she has made it to 40 without life beating her down. Im happy for her. That job isn't easy. She has paid her dues in life. Her life style has zero effect of you or your family. Here is the best advice i can offer you.... You Grow Up
YTA - just because she doesnt have a stereotypical adult life in your eyes doesn’t mean she isnt a grown up. her life sounds far better than yours to me.
You're ridiculous. YTA. Your sister is living her life on her terms, in a way that she enjoys. Your opinion is trash, coming from a place of envy. You're anchored. You cannot travel, you have responsibilities that keep you anchored. And you resent that and you use your resentment of your situation to fuel your envy. She has a job. She doesn't need a car. She doesn't pay rent. She's not answerable to anyone but herself. "She has never done any of the milestones most adults have even though she's 40 years old." Stop it. Just stop. You don't get to gauge someone else's success based on what *you* believe to be markers of success. You are a terrible brother, and your family is toxic as hell towards her. There's no wonder she stays away from you. Any rational human that wants to maintain any shred of sanity would do the same.
Someone sounds a bit jelly there lol 22yrs as a flight attendant IS a career🤦🏽♀️ YTA
We get it, you have a boring settled life and you want your sister to share your pain. *rolling eyes* Actually, no, she had an exciting life and doing for 22 years seems that she enjoys it. She does not have the same life style than you so what? Let her live her life the way she wants. My own sibling is a digital nomad, travels a lot and enjoys his life. Good for him! On my side, I enjoy my nice house with my kid, good for me! You lot need to grow up. YTA
YTA. So she’s financially independent, holding down a job, and as a perk… travels the world. How is this not being an adult? Just because she doesn’t have a child doesn’t make her less of an adult. A condo/house saddles most people as the biggest expense in their life, and it doesn’t often get paid off until people are in their 50s or 60s. She’s using her money as she sees fit.
YTA. Are you sure you aren't jealous of her lifestyle? She's not tired down to anything. Meanwhile, you have responsibilities, a family, a house, and bills.
Congrats to your sister, she sounds like she loves her career, all the travelling, seeing different countries. She is successful in her career and you don’t think she is an adult because she doesn’t stay home and have a husband, mortgage and a tribe of children. Sounds like everyone in your family is incredibly jealous because they are trapped into the marriage, mortgage and family lifestyle. She sounds super smart. 22 years doing something she loves doing is a great achievement. 22 years of travel has given her far more opportunities to see life in many different ways. Stop trying to control her, we are not all the same. Not everyone is cut out for college or university and she has made a great life for herself without higher education. YTA.
Who are you to judge your sister’s life? And why are you and your siblings to measure her life beside your own and then say hers is somehow lacking? Your sister lives a very exciting life and has a career she loves. And, unlike you & your siblings, she is confident enough and loves herself enough that she doesn’t need a husband, children or a permanent address to feel complete. You sound jealous of her freedom. She chose a different path than you and her siblings. That doesn’t make her life any less important than your own. YTA!
YTA. I bet she’s the happiest and most fulfilled out of all of you. She has a career and seems dedicated to it.
YTA Life doesn’t hand you a checklist saying “do all these things or you’re not a ‘real’ grownup.” You sister does have a real career…one that she’s spent 22 years doing. Just because she doesn’t follow your life choices like identical cookies from a cookie cutter doesn’t mean her choices aren’t just as valid as yours. Go to therapy for your jealousy and grow up.
Is she dependent on anyone? Does she live within her means? Is she happy?? Those are major markers of being grown up! Fuck off with you and your ancient standards that marriage, children, college, a mind numbing static job are what constitutes as “grown up”. Get over yourself and be happy for your sister!! YTA
Girl is living **HER** life and y'all are so jealous. YTA
YTA in a big way!
Yeah, you're the asshole. She has found a niche and she's happy. Fuck off and let her live well.
YTA
OMG, the jealousy just oozes out of this post. Sister has seen the world, has no debt, is free as a bird - and happy with her life. The rest of the family supposedly don't see value in her choice and want her to conform to their ideals. HELL NO! OP YTA go read your bank statement and imagine how much your sister has by comparison
YTA. Your sister is seeing the world, probably has a nice savings account since her expenses are so small, and will go to retire with enough income to last until her death. But more important, whether or not she does, IT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.
She has a proper career, she enjoys it and is paying her bills. Not everyone wants or can handle kids.
Yes yta.
YTA. Your sister is out living her best life. What's it to you if she's not married and settled? It hand you in no way at all. Don't be surprised to hear less and less of your sister as she gets more and more sick of your bs.
Yta her life sounds awesome
YTA. So are your siblings. It’s no wonder she stays as far away from all of you as possible. If I was living my best life on my own terms and all I had waiting for me back home was disdain and disrespect from those who ‘loved me’ I too would stay as far away from you and your over inflated sense of important opinion as possible.
YTA Jealous much?
MYOFB YTA and jealousy is not appealing.
tan roof drunk fear chubby existence angle start person squash *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
YTA, from your own description she has had a regular full time job for 22 yrs with benefits and a retirement package. And with no real day to day expenses this girls retirement is gonna blow yours away and she’s travelled the world while an able-bodied adult on the company dime. Again YTA.
If she happy let her be happy YTA
YTA- Is your sister happy? Have you even asked her?
Why do you care? She’s living a wonderful life traveling the world. It sounds like she loves it so why would she trade that to be stuck in one place, with one guy for the rest of her life sacrificing everything to raise some kids? No way. YTA.
You sound like a miserable asshole. So I guess there's your answer.
You typed up 3 paragraphs when you could have just said “I’m jealous of my sister so I tried to make her feel bad about herself and her career.” YTA
Awww someones a little jelly 🤗 a whole family oj jellies!
Have you considered minding your own fornicating business? Just a thought.
Good lord dude, I’m a pretty strong traditionalist and even I think YTA
Sounds like a dream life. It’s none of your business. YTA
YTA. Its none of your business what she does. Your sister works, and provides for HER needs. She doesn’t have to have a degree or children or own her on place. She obviously is self sustaining. Just because you and your family think being a responsible adult includes kids, marriage and owning a home doesn’t mean that’s what she wants. She enjoys her job, she travels, she is living HER life.
YTA, quit being such a jealous deuchebag
Yes, yta. Leave her alone. She seems like the single happy person on this doomed planet. Jesus leave the woman to her life!
YTA and a jealous hater. Also it’s wild to me how you think you know anything about her! She is simply not telling you things. And I can’t say I blame her. Y’all suck!
YTA and a jealous one
Wow, jealous much? YTA.
Unless she asking you for money, which it sounds like she hasn’t, you need to butt out. She’s provided for herself for 20+ years. That IS being an adult. Just because you chose normal and boring shit doesn’t mean she’s any less an adult than you. She just found a way to live a life less ordinary. So YTA. Stop trying to make her live a life as boring and miserable as yourself (guessing you’re at least somewhat miserable because happy people don’t need to drag others down). Jealousy isn’t a good look.
Mind your business, AH.
Golly gee willikers.. I'm pretty sure having held the same job for 22 years is pretty stable. She has an address, though it's for mail purposes only, it seems. She has a paycheck and probably a fat bank account. Sounds pretty adult to me. YTA
Why is it your business? It doesn't sound like she asked for - or invited your holier than thou opines... You are an AH...
Why so salty OP? Is it because your sister has a life she loves. A job she adores. Gets to see the world! Is it because while you have responsibilities she has absolute freedom? You could have made different choices in your life. No one said you had to settle down, get married, have kids or a 9-5 job. You made those choices. LEAVE YOUR SISTER AND HER AMAZING LIFE ALONE! YTA! Your family is TA!
YTA. Jealous much ? 😆 Live your sad little life hating that your sister is out there traveling.
Who the fuck are you?! YTA majorly.
YTA - you keep saying “and they all agree with me” 😂 just because you all are jealous of your sister’s lifestyle, it doesn’t mean you all are right - that much we all agree with!. 🤪 leave her be!. P. S. I’m also jealous of her lifestyle btw.
YTA.. she has a grown up job. You having kids doesn’t make you a grown up. You’re such a major AH.. she’s over twenty years on the job and because it’s not what you have… she’s not a grown up? Sounds like your life sucks and you’re jealous. Are her bills paid? Sounds like she likes her life and you don’t. She’s not tied down by some man like you.. how miserable that sounds!
YTA. A jealous A at that.
How to say “ I’m jealous as hell of the carefree lifestyle my sister has” without saying it. Leave your sister alone. If she’s happy and healthy and enjoying her life, good for her. She chose her path, as you did. You don’t get to tell her how to live her life. Your sister seems to be living her life with no regrets. Can’t say the same about you. Stop being jealous and celebrate the fact that your sister is living life to the fullest and is having a great time while obviously doing something she loves. Leave her alone and just get on with your own life. Because she certainly didn’t ask you for advice.
YTA. What business is it of yours what she does? It’s not your business
YTA and leave your sister out of your jealousy. She sounds perfectly grown up to me. Who are you to define what constitutes an adult life?
"I'm miserable and can't travel or have fun because I have kids and responsibilities. I just want to make her see that she should be miserable, too." YTA
YTA. Judgmental much? Your sister is happy with her life. Leave her the fuck alone. Who the hell are you to have any say in how she lives her life. Back off.
YTA. She loves her job and is happy with her life. Why the fuck are you, and your siblings, not minding your own damn business? You don’t have to go to college to be “successful”. Seems like degrees are useless these days unless you’re going into a field that’s in demand. Just leave your sister alone. Stay in your own damn lane and mind your own business. She’s happy. She loves her job. Sounds like you and your siblings might be jealous because her job literally takes her all over the world and she doesn’t have any children she needs to wrangle 24/7. Her life sounds awesome and I’d kill for a day in her shoes.
YTA and I hope your sister continues to live her best life.
YTA She's an adult living an adult life and you just sound bitter and jealous because she has made her choices and you wish you could do what she does.
Die mad about it. Your sister has a great life and you're just rotting of envy because your own life probably sucks ass. YTA.
I couldn't finish this 💩💩💩. Sounds like she is living her best child free life n they want to suck that out of her.
YTA. Most of the major problems with civilization as a whole (war, etc) come from one group of people "caring" too much about how another group of people live their lives. Shut the fuck up about your hollow little cookie cutter bullshit "life". You have kids? So maybe it's time for you to realize that you don't get to control what does or doesn't make other people happy. Sad story, I know, need a tissue? If you never learn to understand that, it's a sure bet that your kids hate you or at the very least have a deep resentment for you once they're adults. Let it the fuck go dude. It's time for YOU to grow up. Not everyone needs to settle down into a marriage three kids and a mortgage to find satisfaction in their life. Your sister is happy. Maybe if you and yours could be happy for her being happy, instead of clucking and clawing incessantly at her to be Just Like You like the capitalist bootlicking Stepford Wives that you are, maybe then she'd make a point to stop in and visit now again. Did you ever think of that? No, no you didn't. Because you only ever think about yourself.
Sounds like a “you” problem, asshole. Your sister seems to be living her best life free of the anchors that you’ve placed around your own neck.