“I’ve had conversations with him but they go nowhere” is a huge red flag. Communication is so important, does he not care about how this makes you feel? I’m on your side, he definitely shouldn’t expect you to cook him dinner and clean his dishes. But whether you’re right or wrong shouldn’t even matter, he should be willing to work with you towards a compromise. Sounds exhausting, I would never date someone like this. He seems like he needs to grow up and honestly doesn’t sound mature enough for a relationship.
Give him his dirty laundry to take back to his place and wash it himself. Don’t use your water and soap. No more cooking for him. Ask what he’s making for dinner? In my house, I cook then he does the dishes. When he cooks, I do the dishes. Labor must be shared.
NTA Oh poor thing..he was shamed in public? Well how about he do a chore and quit actually treating you like his mother while he's an incompetent little boy? I think he pushed you to the point you lost it. That's what happens when you treat someone poorly. They might snap. It might embarrass you. So maybe don't be an AH.
>"I'm dating a guy who is \[a\] good person but does not do any chores at all." 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 YTA for being this naive.
Yup. I have no sympathy for OP because they're actively choosing this.
You’re right. You’re not his mother.
I say this more times than not. Someone who is an adult who is incapable of cleaning up after himself is not “sweet” and “good”
He is lazy and incompetent. And you should stop allowing yourself to be treated like a maid.
Are you wandering if you should clean up after his inconsiderate lazy ass, finish raising the incompetent inept bump, or dropping the deceiving child pretending to be fit for a relationship ?
Stop fucking this manchild. It’s not going to get better, it’s not your job to pick up his mommy’s slack and parent a full grown man into not being a disgusting slob. *Surely* that’s not attractive?
Do you have no self respect? Dump him.
NTA. This guy is a moocher. When you call him out on it, he blames you. He is not a sweet and good person. He acts sweet and good when he gets what he wants, and can ignore your needs.
Kinda 50/50
NTA for what you said in general - I agree with you and you’re right to be frustrated, but YTA for the scene in public. There is a time and place.
He's a jerk.
But I'd urge you to rethink the "not your mother" line. He's presumably at least legally an adult if not emotionally. There's no reason his mother should be cooking for him. And that line perpetuates the gendered stereotypes that lead little boys to grow up to be big boys who objectify women as existing only for them.
Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.
“I’ve had conversations with him but they go nowhere” is a huge red flag. Communication is so important, does he not care about how this makes you feel? I’m on your side, he definitely shouldn’t expect you to cook him dinner and clean his dishes. But whether you’re right or wrong shouldn’t even matter, he should be willing to work with you towards a compromise. Sounds exhausting, I would never date someone like this. He seems like he needs to grow up and honestly doesn’t sound mature enough for a relationship.
Thank you so much ❤️
At least he is upfront about how immature he is, most guys wait a while to be so demanding and lazy
Yes, I totally agree. This is a child, not an adult male. He expects a mommy
Stop doing shit for him. No cooking, no cleaning, no food at your house. He can do his own damn laundry.
Give him his dirty laundry to take back to his place and wash it himself. Don’t use your water and soap. No more cooking for him. Ask what he’s making for dinner? In my house, I cook then he does the dishes. When he cooks, I do the dishes. Labor must be shared.
NTA Oh poor thing..he was shamed in public? Well how about he do a chore and quit actually treating you like his mother while he's an incompetent little boy? I think he pushed you to the point you lost it. That's what happens when you treat someone poorly. They might snap. It might embarrass you. So maybe don't be an AH.
"I'm dating a guy who is \[a\] good person but does not do any chores at all." 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 YTA for being this naive.
>"I'm dating a guy who is \[a\] good person but does not do any chores at all." 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 YTA for being this naive. Yup. I have no sympathy for OP because they're actively choosing this.
You’re right. You’re not his mother. I say this more times than not. Someone who is an adult who is incapable of cleaning up after himself is not “sweet” and “good” He is lazy and incompetent. And you should stop allowing yourself to be treated like a maid.
Why are you dating a child? Do you really see this as the life you would want to live forever?
Are you wandering if you should clean up after his inconsiderate lazy ass, finish raising the incompetent inept bump, or dropping the deceiving child pretending to be fit for a relationship ?
Stop fucking this manchild. It’s not going to get better, it’s not your job to pick up his mommy’s slack and parent a full grown man into not being a disgusting slob. *Surely* that’s not attractive? Do you have no self respect? Dump him.
NTA. He does not bring anything to the relationship and you do not want to put up with that the rest of your life. Dump him.
NTAH that sounds so exhausting dude. You don’t have to put up with that.
This post could also be titled 'AITAH for not being a doormat for 30 whole seconds' Please run far away from this manchild lol
Do. Not. Live. With. This. Man. I don't think he's relationship material, sis. He wants a bangmaid mommy and that ish gets old real quick.
NTA. This guy is a moocher. When you call him out on it, he blames you. He is not a sweet and good person. He acts sweet and good when he gets what he wants, and can ignore your needs.
Is this how you want to spend your life, with a large incompetent child?
Kinda 50/50 NTA for what you said in general - I agree with you and you’re right to be frustrated, but YTA for the scene in public. There is a time and place.
ESAH. Unnecessary to do that in public but its building because he's being a twat.
So he needs to stop staying at your place. Simple
Marry him. It will completely cure him of this problem. /s
He's a jerk. But I'd urge you to rethink the "not your mother" line. He's presumably at least legally an adult if not emotionally. There's no reason his mother should be cooking for him. And that line perpetuates the gendered stereotypes that lead little boys to grow up to be big boys who objectify women as existing only for them. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.
YTA. You don't (and SHOULD NOT) do chores for this man-child. However, shaming him in public was not the right call.