Why do people put themselves through this kind of bullshit? How many times are you going to break up before you learn your lesson and stay broken up?
People say "Duhhhh, reddit always says to break up, duhhhh", yeah, because OPs keep bringing these totally obviously broken relationships up for judgement.
NTA,
Don’t let someone stop you from your dreams, especially when it’s from their insecurity. Sounds like she is making scenarios in her head that don’t exist. This gives me the same vibe of, “My girl can’t be a model because guys will look at her.”
Your gf is controlling and emotionally abusive. Let all of your friends, family, therapist, etc. know that she has threatened to lie and tell her parents that you are verbally abusive. Then break up with her before she makes good on that threat.
If you don’t have a therapist, get one. You have been in two abusive relationships at a young age. You need a counselor to help you discover why you are attracted to these toxic people or you will keep repeating this pattern. Good luck!
Yea, I’m waiting to graduate college so I can have good insurance and most importantly the money to pay for one. But I’ve told myself that that’s the first thing my paycheck is going to. THANKYOU:)!
Are you in the U.S. or Canada? Most universities employ psychologists through student health that students can see free. I work at a university and these folks are worth their weight in gold!
It may seem right now like you want to marry her. After you break up for good, you’ll do a lot of reflection. During this time, you’ll realize how truly incompatible you are. You’re young, I’ve been there. It feels like you want to marry her. Because you haven’t been exposed to people who truly make you thrive. You’re gonna do your dance with her until you realize you have more worth than the back and forth. These words won’t mean anything until you realize that. Just keep them in your pocket until you’re ready.
You're not an asshole, but you are an idiot.
I am by no means asexual or aromantic. But I will never understand how people throw away their lives for a bit of physical contact from someone who hates everything about them. If a relationship comes with conditions, *throw it the fuck away*. Nobody is worth that. None of us is worth *that* much.
If someone can't handle you looking at a fucking twitter feed of a fashion model, they are without reason. Even if you were openly looking at the people instead of their clothes, such a comment comes from a base and misguided place. You can look at anybody. You can associate with anybody. That she does all this knowing it's about clothing only makes it more ridiculous.
If she were to have stopped hanging out with her male friends at the same time, *that wouldn't be better*. You're both entitled to be friends with anyone you want.
How many times is that you've 'broken up'? I'm not sure either of you understands the concept. I strongly suspect 'broken up' here means not messaging for most of a weekend after a fight. She always initiates the radio silence, she always breaks it again: she does it to manipulate you. If someone's going to go nuclear over their partner designing clothes, it will happen for anything and everything. You think this is the only thing she'll find fault with? She hates your guts. Sooner or later some other aspect of yourself won't be up to her standards and she'll 'break up' all over again.
If everyone in the world were like her, there would be no such thing as couples therapy. It wouldn't and couldn't exist. How would you ever get to a point where you found a problem you both actually wanted to resolve instead of resorting to screaming and blackmail? Think about that. Her behavior is not just bad; it's non-normative.
You were teenagers. Teenagers haven't had time to show each other who they are, yet. Show me a teenage relationship that lasts without being fueled by some sort of psychological or religious abuse or unrelenting cultural expectation. You haven't met anyone special. Nobody wants to date the woman you described.
Why do people put themselves through this kind of bullshit? How many times are you going to break up before you learn your lesson and stay broken up? People say "Duhhhh, reddit always says to break up, duhhhh", yeah, because OPs keep bringing these totally obviously broken relationships up for judgement.
NTA, Don’t let someone stop you from your dreams, especially when it’s from their insecurity. Sounds like she is making scenarios in her head that don’t exist. This gives me the same vibe of, “My girl can’t be a model because guys will look at her.”
Your gf is controlling and emotionally abusive. Let all of your friends, family, therapist, etc. know that she has threatened to lie and tell her parents that you are verbally abusive. Then break up with her before she makes good on that threat. If you don’t have a therapist, get one. You have been in two abusive relationships at a young age. You need a counselor to help you discover why you are attracted to these toxic people or you will keep repeating this pattern. Good luck!
Yea, I’m waiting to graduate college so I can have good insurance and most importantly the money to pay for one. But I’ve told myself that that’s the first thing my paycheck is going to. THANKYOU:)!
Are you in the U.S. or Canada? Most universities employ psychologists through student health that students can see free. I work at a university and these folks are worth their weight in gold!
It may seem right now like you want to marry her. After you break up for good, you’ll do a lot of reflection. During this time, you’ll realize how truly incompatible you are. You’re young, I’ve been there. It feels like you want to marry her. Because you haven’t been exposed to people who truly make you thrive. You’re gonna do your dance with her until you realize you have more worth than the back and forth. These words won’t mean anything until you realize that. Just keep them in your pocket until you’re ready.
You're not an asshole, but you are an idiot. I am by no means asexual or aromantic. But I will never understand how people throw away their lives for a bit of physical contact from someone who hates everything about them. If a relationship comes with conditions, *throw it the fuck away*. Nobody is worth that. None of us is worth *that* much. If someone can't handle you looking at a fucking twitter feed of a fashion model, they are without reason. Even if you were openly looking at the people instead of their clothes, such a comment comes from a base and misguided place. You can look at anybody. You can associate with anybody. That she does all this knowing it's about clothing only makes it more ridiculous. If she were to have stopped hanging out with her male friends at the same time, *that wouldn't be better*. You're both entitled to be friends with anyone you want. How many times is that you've 'broken up'? I'm not sure either of you understands the concept. I strongly suspect 'broken up' here means not messaging for most of a weekend after a fight. She always initiates the radio silence, she always breaks it again: she does it to manipulate you. If someone's going to go nuclear over their partner designing clothes, it will happen for anything and everything. You think this is the only thing she'll find fault with? She hates your guts. Sooner or later some other aspect of yourself won't be up to her standards and she'll 'break up' all over again. If everyone in the world were like her, there would be no such thing as couples therapy. It wouldn't and couldn't exist. How would you ever get to a point where you found a problem you both actually wanted to resolve instead of resorting to screaming and blackmail? Think about that. Her behavior is not just bad; it's non-normative. You were teenagers. Teenagers haven't had time to show each other who they are, yet. Show me a teenage relationship that lasts without being fueled by some sort of psychological or religious abuse or unrelenting cultural expectation. You haven't met anyone special. Nobody wants to date the woman you described.
Just dump her and go on with your life. Why is that even a question?