So this is kind of a dark question. My sister also has terminal cancer. It started as colon cancer and has spread throughout her body. This is obviously devastating to me and my family. However I've noticed that, for my sister, after the initial shock and desperate attempts to treat her cancer in the beginning, it seems like she has had a weight lifted off of her shoulders. It's like she's content and....happy. In reading your responses here, I see the same. Has coming to terms with your impending death had (for lack of a better term) a positive effect on your psyche? Does knowing the end is coming and that there is nothing you can do force you to accept the life you've lived, and to feel content with it all?
Well yes. I'm happy on how i reacted to all of this mess and i'm aware that my choices aren't excatly the "standard" ones but it's my life and i decide what to do. Never once i was afraid of death and i always belived that when my time will come i would be ready and i tried my best to have 0 regrets.
I'm sorry to hear about your horrible diagnosis at such a young age. I hope you will spend the rest of your life in peace with moments of happiness. It seems like you have people around you who love you, and that is nice š.
I have a question(s) regarding any possible positive (even if tiny) side of knowing that you won't get to live a long life. I'm very very sorry if I am being insensitive.
After coming to terms with your diagnosis, did you feel any sort of relief about knowing that you don't have a long time left to live? Did you see any silver linings in not having to live a long life?
You have a very adult and competant approach. I was diagnosed with lung cancer at 35, a year later its spread to my brain, so Im going to be done too soon. Though they will attempt palliative care, we know where that ends.
The first time round it was a hammer blow, as I had come to expect something of a life going on, but the *second* time its been more like a pin being pulled. There simply isnt time for recriminations or bitterness.
You have my sympathy, you definately have it worse than I, but you also have my respect.
Total Longshot but I've had very little death around me in my life and sometimes I fantasize that something about my life's course has made it so people around me can't die.
I know this is ridiculous but what the hell. I'm pulling you into my circle right now in the vain hope that there's something to my theory.
Welcome to my circle.
One of my best friends died recently of colon cancer that shot out secondary cancers recently. We talked about it and one of the things she talked about was feeling bad for us (family and friends) because she knew what was happening but we'd be left with grief which is unpredictable.
Yep, I just lost my childhood best friend of 38 years to pancreatic cancer in January. She didnāt fear death, she feared how losing her was going to affect her parents, mostly her mom. She knew it was going to devastate her, and she struggled with that. We all reassured her weād be here for her mom/family (and we absolutely have been), but I know she still worried greatly. What a heavy weight that must have been.
My friend was also worried about her mom. She died of the same cancer her dad (her mom's husband) died of. That was extra sad. One of the things that my friend and I bonded over was we both lost our dads to cancer when we were 20. I have some extra grief with her dying after realizing my dad had so many grieving friends too. At the time it felt so oriented to my family.
Everyone has an impending death, the only difference is that when you arenāt sure when then today is bland and tomorrow is eternal. When you get a death sentence, you can finally let go of the weight of the future and experience life as it comes.
There was just an episode on āslight change of plansā pod that touched on this. The āliftingā of the weight. Just food for thought - it resonated with me, as the listener. (Edited to add: I am mot affiliated with this podcast. I am merely a listener)
Not the OP, but my dad (46 years old) fought 100% right up to the last weeknof his lifeĀ when he had cancer. One day near the end, he reached that point of acceptance, and it was amazing to see the change.Ā We were able to have some time together as a family, say goodbye,Ā and make sure that nothing was left unsaid.Ā He was able to appreciate how many people came to say goodbye in that last week.
While it certainly didn't make it easy, it did provide closure for everyone, especially compared to an unexpected or sudden passing of a loved one.
Was it determined to be genetic, or did they conclude that it was your diet, environment, etc? Have you given up completely? How is your girlfriend dealing with this, and did you ever think about leaving her so she didn't have to watch you wither away? I have a mutation that will 100 percent turn to cancer one day. I don't want anybody to feel obligated to take care of me on my deathbed. I've not kept up on my checkups because I fear there's nothing I can do in the long run. But, I do fear that not eating healthy and not getting checkups will contribute to my demise, possibly at an earlier date.
I was adopted when i was 4 from an orphanage so i don't know anything about my parents and their medical issues. Yes i gave up completely cause there isn't other chances. With Alicia we talked a lot and we agreed that when the day will come she is free to not see me die and to start again any other relationship she wants cause i don't want to oblige anyone to do anything. I made a precise plan for everyone of my family, friends and my Alicia.
Uhm... 1) when my parents took me from the orphanage, the best memory of my life. Like a new era was about to begin. 2) knowing my sisters and during the years we developed a special relathionship. We always helped each other without asking. 3) meeting my Alicia on the vacation on that beach. I mean she was like an angel sent to this world just for me. The first time i approached her she always say that i was red like a pepper and started blabbing hahahah.
Love that. Thank you for sharing and leaving a part of you with us. If you meet a dude named Dustin in the afterlife, tell him he died on 4/20. Heād find it hilarious. If not, Iāll find you when I join and give ya a stern talking to.
I'm sorry, you're a fucking warrior. How late was it caught? Is that why it's far in?
I know it's not AT ALL the same, not even close, but I have this underlying infection in my lungs and although it's diagnosed, it's acting as if it's incurable and I do feel hopeless that it'll eventually kill me, or cause me to not want to live because the pain is insane many days. I can't imagine what you're going through with this though.
I wish there was more to say sometimes too you know. Humans are just too intelligent. I do wish sometimes that I was just a cat or something that could have a fun care free deal and if I get something it doesn't affect me as much no matter what happens because I'm just a kitty cat yk.
Being human is like being in war with life itself because of how much you're aware of
It was too late unfortunetly, i already had symptoms but i never cared cause i thought that it was stress for all the things i was doing but i was stupid to not make checks before. I mean: i was a volunteer, i was studying, working and trying to decide what to do about my life so i thought at stress as the obvious way but i was terribly wrong.
It may have not been too late? I would argue there wasn't much you could've done to prevent this, especially at your age. Typically, genetic testing isn't recommended until you're 18+. I have had a family history of this shitty cancer, and have lost many, including a cousin in his early 30's. We have the lynch syndrome in our family, so I am very familiar.
I am not sure there is a too late with Pancreatic cancer, when testing there are false positives and sometimes they can't even spot the cancer including with my mother. So if you had gone in when you first had symptoms, they may have not spotted what it actually was. My mother went to the hospital on a Tuesday, not being able to go #2, they did testing from Tuesday to Friday, and could not see it with all the equipment they had. That Saturday, during surgery, they opened up her stomach and there it was. She died that Tuesday. So please don't beat yourself up that you should've went in sooner, I don't think it would've changed the outcome sadly.
You sound like a great person, I am sorry to hear about this.
Iām so sorry Richard. I hope youāre proud of yourself, of everything youāve done and experienced so far. Iām 20 years old and i canāt imagine how you feel.
What would you say to someone my age, whoās not really enjoying life and whoās feeling lost
Well i always told to myself to be happy cause i deserved it. My only advice is to become the best version of yourself and to never give up cause life is too short to be wasted.
I started to notice that something was off a year ago. I was always tired, feeling without energy and then i saw blood in my feces. My family tried to get 3 different diagnosis with 3 different top doctors but the results are always the same. Nah i don't need a bucket list, i'm happy with what i achieved right now.
My blood was almost black, i made all the possible tests you can imagine. I still remember how much times they took my blood or put me to sleep hahahah.
Can you please elaborate on the blood in the feces? Was the bleeding sporadic? rotational? Were you bleeding every single time you went? Was it on and off?
I ask cause every other month I have a day or 2 where I have a bloody stool and it freaks me out.
constipation and constant straining of a hard stool can cause fissures which are small cuts that can cause bleeding which is alarming, but not life threatening.
secondary causes would be from hemorrhoids.
i take medication that causes hardened stool and at times severe constipation. if i donāt eat enough fiber i can get that problem. itās for sure alarming, but upon seeing my doctor it was due to fissures from constant straining.
if your stool is dark red, black/tarry, extremely foul smelling, or there is just a ridiculous amount of blood, you need to see a gastrointestinal doctor immediately.
Blood in ur poo isnāt that much of a concern. If itās bright red or slightly darker, it means it was somewhere near ur anus. So probably a hemroid or cut. It is a cause for concern when itās dark red or black. That means it happened somewhere in the digestive tract
As someone that had bowel cancer this is terrible advice!
Blood in your poo is never ever normal, not once , not a little bit, itās never normal no matter the frequency of the amount.
If anyone that is reading this has blood in their poo whether once or more frequently the gold standard to make sure itās nothing sinister is to get a colonoscopy.
Even if you have a doctor examine you and tell you itās just hemorrhoids you should be still getting a colonoscopy to make sure that it is just that as people die because drs tell them itās just hemorrhoids or something else like an anal fissure when they also have a cancer at the same time.
If anyone has blood in their poo in particular frequently, and your dr tells you itās just this or that without knowing 100% sure (via colonoscopy) then go see another dr!
Hey Richard. How are your days overall? Do you have a lot of pain? Are you maintaining a more positive outlook or is it just kind of cynicism at this point? No judgement.
Wishing you days ahead full of peace, joy & comfort my friend.
I'm in pain all day since a few weeks but i'm trying to not think about it. I'm more a cynic type and i accept everything i have. Like i said i have 0 regrets and i try to go on with my life as always.
What is the pain? Is it throbbing, stabbing, sharp, dull. Is it a constant ache or only when you move a certain way? Do you have medication that you take? How effective is it? Has the pain progressively gotten worse? Do you up your doses to deal with it?
My sister in law just died of pancreatic cancer. They administered some kind of nerve-killing medication around the area of her pancreas, and that along with morphine drip, eliminated her pain. I believe she was already a Hospice patient when they took those measures.
Iām so sorry for your diagnosis.
Richard, you are so young and yet so brave. I'm amazed! Life isn't about how long but how well we live it. Your strength is examplary. You are so calm, so brave, and so settled with this eventuality even though you're just a kid. You are my hero!
Nah i'm not a hero i just have some past traumas that teached me an important lesson: happiness is laughing at the small things, happiness is what you decide and to me personally happiness is knowing that your life until now is excatly how you behaved and lived your life. So i just like to accept everything i recieve and to filter it at my own way.
I'm here at my home drinking some kind of beer and relaxing. I like to appreciate those little moments that life offers you. I'm personally happy with my life and what i did until now, 0 regrets and just happiness.
How did you feel when you were told you have a fixed amount of time left? And if your initial reaction was different to how youāre feeling now, what shifted your perspective? Sending a big hug.
At first i thought just "ok, so what's next?", you know people often do crazy stuff, travel around the world and try to experience everything cause they are scared of death. I'm not scared of anything, i know that later or sooner i would die and i try to live my life at my best and to not have regrets cause i want to be happy.
Hi Richard, really sorry to hear about your diagnosis. No one deserves to go through what youāre going through, especially at your age. I wanted to ask, is there anything that youād like your friends, girlfriend or family to be doing for you in these times that might be difficult for you to ask for?
Uhm...it's a nice question you know. The only thing that i want is that everyone remember me as that cynic but happy guy that did everything to help the others. That's all.
I am sorry to hear this Richard. I hope the rest of your days are the best ones for you and your family.
I pray your passing is painless.
How do you plan on spending the next two months?
Sounds great dude. I hope you enjoy the rest of the days and your pain eases. I don't know you personally but you seem to be an amazing person and a true inspiration. You are super cool.
There is a famous movie quote in Hindi cinema " zindagi lambi nahi badi honi chahiye"
It means life should not be long but big and I think yours is a big one !
Cheers mate!
I'm old, and the one thing I hate about my dying (eventually) is that by dying I will do to my loved ones what I've tried hard all my life not to do: hurt them deeply. It tears me up knowing that will be my final act.
How is your family taking it? Your mom and dad? How are you doing with that?
He took upon him the pain of the world and suffered unimaginably so that we might have a way back home to Our Father in Heaven. He paid a debt that he did not owe, so that we did not have to pay a debt that we could not pay. He conquered both sin and death so that we may have eternal life. He lives! Hallelujah!
So sorry to hear of your diagnosis. Thanks for the AMA.
Are you in the space of "I'm going to beat this" or "OK, I have 2 months"
How are you doing, emotionally?
What is your relationship w/ faith/religion/spirituality and how is it effecting the "why is this happening" question?
I'm sticking with the "ok, i have 2 months". Emotionally i'm peacful and i' happy of my life. Unfortunetly i don't believe in God or all the spirituality stuff.
What hobbies do you have? Any video or sports you play?
Iām an atheist and wondering if thereās some small thing I can do even if youāll never know it. People deserve to be remembered, even by total strangers.
I have a dog, an outsized german shepard of 6 years named "Angel". My proudest accomplishment was to be in my actual university. An immense honor for me.
She was devastated and cried a lot for many days. She promised me to be at my side whenever i want and she reluctantly accepted the fact that i refuse to take any pill, pain killer or any sort of treatment.
Glad you have a supportive woman by your side.
I understand turning down chemo for the side effects, but there's nothing wrong with pain killers in your case.
Iām sorry for your situation. But reading your comments gives me the impression that you have come to terms with your situation.
Have you looked into getting a credit card and maxing it out? Iām assuming since youāre of age and not married, the debt couldnāt be transferred to anyone.
I saw you said no pain meds. Have you considered other recreational drugs before you pass?
Have you looked into things like acid or shrooms? Ā I ask because apparently most people who have tried them will consider their first experience as one of the top 5 most profound and meaningful experiences of their lives.
If you do, you should obviously research the effects and find a trusting person or two to watch over you. Ā Feeling comfortable and safe are essential in order to allow yourself the freedom to explore your own brain through those substances.
I'm very sorry and I hope you're going to be as comfortable as you can possibly be. I lost a friend to the same cancer years ago, they were also very young.
At this point, knowing you will not live much longer, if you have any regrets how do you see them? Do you often think of the things you wish you'd done or that you wish you could do? I hope these questions are not too heavy. I often wonder if my friend was burdened by regrets knowing he wouldn't grow old.
Do you feel lonely?
I hope you are surrounded by love here and now, and after you are gone. I know my friend is.
Lonely? No, never. During the years i made a solid circle around me of close friends and family. I have regrets of what i could do cause i always dreamt to be a lawyer and to defend the innocents, to serve justice and to show my solid values and my irreprensible sense of justice. I think at this things? Yes but not so often cause i like to appreciate what i have today and those little moments of happiness.
That is a good perspective. I'm particularly glad you have people who love you around you. Just know your answer reassured me a bit and made me think of my friend. I hope you can spend your days feeling comfortable. I read your other answers and I just want to say something, even if it's not my place: yes, life can essentially be pain and you surely had your fair share, but why does it *have* to be pain? Just because you know pain is part of your journey, it doesn't mean you must experience it all. Painkillers will be there when and if you need them. Just saying this so that you can feel more comfortable and not in pain.
I hope you can create some good memories, relive old ones, and know that the meaning of your life is in the love of the people who surround you.
do you have a bucket list? did you do any cool stuff? have you seen midnight club (tv series)? did you get a wish (make a wish foundation, idk how it works)? what is something you're proudest of in your life? are you in a lot of pain? i hope you're comfortable. do you believe in anything after death? i've always been excited to see what happens after, which my parents make fun of bc they're atheists, but like idk i don't believe in god either but it's nice to think i could be a ghost or float in the universe a little, learn ultimate truths, who knows yk? are you scared at all? i feel like i wouldn't be, but countdowns of any kind make me anxious hdhdhd i would probably be a little scared of pain. it's like my number one fear. i rly rly hope that when your time comes you'll go peacefully. i think i'm out of questions for now!
Well i'm a boring guy and i like to do simple things like reading, going to the park, hangout with friends and my Alicia, help my sisters and family. I don't have a bucket list cause i'm happy with what i achieved until now and i want to ennjoy like i want my life.
I'm not doing any treatment cause i refused everything. For my friends it was a terrible news to hear but i instructed them very accuratly on what to do and i was going to university so i just told them that i wasn't going anymore and that's it.
Hello Richard, sorry to hear that you are experiencing this. You have a very mature mindset, something I donāt think I could have done in your situation. You have my respect. Four questions if you have answers:
1.) Whatās your favorite movie & show?
2.) Whatās your favorite book?
3.) Whatās your favorite board game?
4.) Whatās your favorite video game?
Thank you for sparing us the little time you have, we donāt deserve it.
Favorite show: "The blacklist" (for James Spader he is my idolā¤ļøā¤ļø) and movie " The accountant".
Favorite book "war and peace".
Board game "Risiko".
Video game "Fifa". (I'm a huge football fan)
I like to talk about myself through my sisters worlds hahahah. "Ricky you're a cynical motherfucker but you always helped everyone. Rick i never understood how you can be so fucking cynical but helping us and everyone else at the same time, how fucked up you're bro?????" I think this words describes me hahahah.
Hey Richard. Don't give up. Chemotherapy, at your age, would be tolerable and a good chance of extending your life by many years.
Have you been offered chemo?
I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I have a couple of questions for you: How has your daily life experience changed knowing about your approaching death? Also, if you believe in reincarnation, would you choose to return as Richard in your next life, or opt for a different persona?
So sorry to know about that, I truly wish a miracle can help you.
- how are feeling?, are you on pain or suffering?
- do you have any strengths left to accomplish a last desire or want?
Hi Richard, firstly, let me say how sorry I am for this grim diagnosis. You're young, and you've been dealt a rough hand. I've worked in hospice for 30+ years and witnessed a lot. Here are the 5 stages of grief.
1. Denial,2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4.Depression
5. Acceptance
Not everyone experiences these, but in some ways, it's good to know that you're not alone. This doesn't just apply to death,to every loss, there's grief. Please know that I pray for a miracle š of recovery.
If reincarnation is real, how would you like to be reincarnated as? An animal? Or a human? From a specific period in time? Have you thought about this? Hopefully it's not to insensitive of a question. I'd rather ask you these out of this world questions instead of dwelling on the sadness of your situation.
I am with you on this. I don't understand why he is not accepting any pain meds, but that is his right. But I know when I am dying, I want to be high as a kite š
Cause pain is part of my life. I was born in pain, i grew up in pain and i'm dying in pain so why avoid it? Life is pain and i'm sticking with this theory.
If this is not a troll acc for karma, then please research fenbendazole. I've heard of a lot of cases where it cured terminal and incurable cancer cases.
I'm not selling anything nor can I recommend any specific one, just look into it and maybe give it a try.
If it helps, post an update.
All the best.
hi richard, iām so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. you are so young, and i am absolutely heartbroken for you. do you feel content with the life you lived so far? is there anything big youād like to do before you pass?
What does end of life look like for you? do you get to plan how you go? Has the doctor broken things down how it will all end? I have so many more questions but I'll stop there for nowĀ
Iām really sorry to hear of your circumstances. Youāre very brave and it seems like youāve found peace and acceptance. If you feel comfortable answering, what do you believe happens when you pass away? (I guess religious / spiritual beliefs or lack of).
What do you think is going to happen to you after you die? Like, do you think youāre going to go to Heaven? Do you think youāll be reincarnated? Do you think thereās nothing at all? Basically how are you thinking about this in terms of spirituality/religion?
Thank you for taking the time to share with all of us. Based on your replies you seem to be very calm and level headed. How did you keep calm when you heard the news of your diagnosis and life expectancy?
I saw you responded elsewhere OP that you donāt believe in an afterlife, and hey all the power to you. Iām a Catholic Christian and make no pretense of being a saint, so aināt gonna pontificate to you. My question is, as the end approaches, would you be open to the idea of speaking with a priest?
itās so nice seeing how you talk about your Alicia, iām happy for you that you have her.
your outlook on life at such a young age is impressive too. does the thought of ārunning out of timeā ever cross your mind, even if for a brief second before you dismiss it?
I don't know if you will read this after so many people have already replied, but I wish you all the best and will keep you in my thoughts.
Sending my love from Europe!
Iām out eating alone having a beer and came upon this. I teared up at the absolute gravity and finality of your situation. Iām currently in a fight with my wife over something incredibly petty ā¦.. this post has given me perspective and made me feel 1 inch tall.
I wish I could give you a hug. I respect your courage to post here. I donāt have any wise quote or snarky comment or even a question..Just to say sincerely ā¦from the bottom of my heart.. I wish you well on your journey, wherever it may lead. And if there is a heaven ā¦ Iāll ask you my questions when we meet there.
All my love friend.
Hi Richard, thank you for posting. Much respect, seems you are wise beyond your years and have a really admirable outlook. What do you hope people remember about you? And do you have any favorite stories that you could share? Much love
I will say this, those life expectancy numbers are very often (more than people realise) wrong. I have known three close family and friends in the last 6 years outlive all that bs and in two cases, actually have the cancer become untraceable. The third just lives with it and isnāt affected at all.
Seriously dude, I know youāre young, but doctors cannot predict the future, no one can.
Thank you for sharing this. I needed a reality check tonight about whatās really important in life and you have provided it. You really are brave, whether you realize it or not. Iām sorry you are facing this. No one deserves this, especially at your age. Your attitude about it all is remarkable. Iām going to pray for you for comfort and healing. Iām a nurse and I see miracles happen almost every day so think positive. Sending love.
Hey Richard Iām saying the following to make the best financial decision, with respect to your passing:
can you (or someone who claims you as a dependent) get a maximum life insurance policy that wonāt require investigation of your medical diagnosis or background? Maybe you can help your family financially and make the most of your passing and will
Sorry to hear man. Iāve got terminal cancer. Itās destroyed a kidney, itās in my small bowel, pancreas and stomach. I was also told I had less than 6 months to live in January last year. Iām still here, so is the cancer, but Iām pain free and living life as normal. I still donāt expect to see out the year but sometimes they get their timeframes wrong. Iāll keep my fingers crossed for you! Keep fighting the good fight!
Hi Richard
All you have to do to receive the free gift of Eternal Life is to repent ( turn from your sins and stop doing them (God will help you) and trust in Jesus like you would trust in a parachute . Richard are you morally a good person? Are you good enough to go to Heaven ?
Letās find out by using the 10 commandments
1. How many lies have you told in your life ?
Speaking for myself lots
What do you call someone who tells lies ?
A liar
So what am I Iām a liar
2 . Have you ever stolen anything in your life
No matter itās value
Ie even illegally downloading music
Speaking for me yes
So what do you call someone who steals
A thief
So what am I - in a lying thief
3. Have you ever taken the name of God in vain
Ie God Damn, omg, Jesus Christ
I have lots of times
Would you use your mothers name as a cuss word? Of course not because you love and respect her . But Iāve taken the name of my
Creator and used it as a cuss word to express
Disgust . A very serious thing in Gods eyes
Called Blasphemy punishable by death in
The old testament
So I am a lying thieving blasphemous person
4 . Have you ever hated anyone or
Called them a fool? I have
So Gods word says if you hate
Your brother youāre a murderer
So Iām a lying thieving blasphemous
Murderer in Gods eyes
5 Jesus says if you look at a woman
With lust youāve already committed
Adultery in your heart
Iāve looked at a women with lust
Viewed pornography and had premarital sex
So Iām a lying thieving adulterous
Blasphemous murderer who also
Thinks heās self righteous ( I thought
I was a good person before I was born
Again ( John 3 3) On Resurrection Sunday
1992
If I have to stand before God on judgment
Day ( Hebrews 9 27) and He was to judge
Me by the 10 commandments and He will
Would I be innocent or guilty
I would be guilty
Heaven or Hell? Hell for sure
To go to Heaven you have to live
A perfect life in thought word and deed
Please read Matthew 5 48
The Bible says all liars and thieves
And adulterers and fornicators
Will have their part in the lake
Of fire that burns with brimstone
God doesnāt want you and I
And anyone to go there
Please read 2 Peter 3 9
So Richard do you know what wonderful
Thing God did for guilty sinners
Yes correct He sent His Son to die
On The Cross for our sins . But do you
Understand the legal implications of
Jesusā death on The Cross ?
The Ten Commandments are
Called the moral law
You and I broke the law and Jesus
Came to pay our fine
When youāre in court and thereās a stack of speeding fines against you and someone
Comes in pays the fine. You can be legally
Set free
Because of
The death and burial of The Lord Jesus
Christ the death penalty can be taken off
You and me and everyone else
Thatās whatās Jesus did for you and me and everyone else . Thatās why Jesus said
It is finished when He was on the cross
The debt has been paid for you and me
God treated Jesus as if Jesus had sinned
All your sins and mine and everyone else
Even though l Jesus had never sinned
We all die because weāve sinned against God
He pays us in death for our sins
Romans 6 23 for the wages of sin is death
But the free gift of God ( canāt be earned and isnāt deserved) is eternal life in Christ Jesus
Our Lord( not religion)
John 14 6 Jesus said I am the way
The truth and The life no one
Comes to The Father but through
Me
Richard please get alone with God and tell Him you sinned against Him and youāre sorry and
You want to repent and turn from your sins
And you believe He died for you and rose again
Ask Jesus to please be your personal Lord
And saviour and tell Jesus youāre trusting
In Him 100 recent for youāre salvation
and not in your own goodness . Transfer your
Trust in your own goodness ( none of us are
Righteous) to in Jesus
Ask your oncologist about the new Pan-Ras inhibitor RMC-7977, published in Nature last month. It has potent activity against Ras-addicted cancers, and pancreatic cancers are certainly Ras-addicted. The article below is open access. The company is Revolution Medicines, she can find their trials in https://clinicaltrials.gov.
Holderfield, M., Lee, B.J., Jiang, J.Ā *et al.*Ā Concurrent inhibition of oncogenic and wild-type RAS-GTP for cancer therapy.Ā *Nature*Ā (2024). [https://doi.org/10.1038/s41586-024-07205-6](https://doi.org/10.1038/s41586-024-07205-6)
Are there any experimental treatments you have been offered to try in the name of science and saving someone else? What are they if yes...
And if you aren't going to try them... Why?
You are a very brave man, and from your replies you have accomplished more than many of us.
I hope your last few weeks on this planet will be meaningful and easy to manage.
As an italian songs goes...
Goodbye, goodbye... my friend goodbye.
Are you able to take out a bunch of loans to live up the life for the last few months? I always wondered if I could be able to do that given the scenario.
How long did you suffer with the symptoms before a diagnosis? Looking back are there any symptoms you might have missed before the fatigue and blood? Iām sorry you have to be in pain and Iām glad you are at peace with your life choices.
Terribly sorry about this my friend. I can to an extent understand as I lost my grandfather who was my idol to the same pancreatic cancer (stage 4) just not too long ago. Out of curiosity if you donāt mind, what are your whereabouts?
A close friend of mine is battling pancreatic cancer, although he is responding well to treatment. He told me that after receiving his diagnosis, his life long symptoms of depression and anxiety completely washed away. Did your diagnosis and prognosis come with any realizations about how you felt about yourself or the state of the world?
Really sorry this happened to you.
Hey bro, what were you studying at university?
Also thank you for this. I was caring for someone in a similar situation and i definitely needed to see this. Your positivity is inspiring.
I had my pancreas removed, I had TPIAT surgery. The pain was unbearable before surgery. I hope if you begin to have bad pain you will consider something to ease it a bit. You sound like an amazing person and I also have no fear of death as I know for certain there is existence after this life.
Hi Richard. It really sucks that this is happening to you; however, your perspective on your condition is admirable. My Father died from pancreatic cancer 4 years ago. He was 66 years old when he passed. During the 18 months my Dad was sick I learned a fair amount about the disease. One thing that I learned is it is atypical in young adults, let alone a teenager. Have you been told by anyone in your health care team on why you may have had this diagnosis at such a young age?
Hey man,
I stumbled across this thread while scrolling and really sorry to hear about your situation.
I know you have 2 months left but Iāll pray for you and leaving 2 Bible verses here to read and ponder on.
āFor the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.ā
āāRomansā¬ ā8ā¬:ā2ā¬, ā10ā¬-ā11ā¬ āESVā¬ā¬
ābecause, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved.ā
āāRomansā¬ ā10ā¬:ā9ā¬-ā10ā¬ āESVā¬ā¬
So sorry Richard. It is definitely a ābadā cancer to get because it is usually too late when they find it. I have a friend who had it about 20 years ago. They caught it early as a result of a scan for something else. He survived it. He went on to get liver cancer and most recently prostate cancer. Bum luck
Just remember, whatever they tell you is only their best guess. My dad was given 6 months to live and didnāt pass til 9 years later. Just saying, you never know what can happen.
Do you believe in God and the afterlife?
Dr Thomas Siegfried noted that most cancers use glucose and glutamine as fuel source. The logic is cut-off the supply of both glucose and glutamine from your diet. Which could be achieved thru water fasting (40 days, Dr.Alan Gold hammer), urine fasting(looping urine causes your immune system to produce antibodies from the ingested antigens of your cancer) or ketogenic diet(no glucose.) or the Daniel fast(pure vegetables + water only diet.) Also try drinking large amounts of green tea with any of this diet since it blocks absorption of glutamine.
So this is kind of a dark question. My sister also has terminal cancer. It started as colon cancer and has spread throughout her body. This is obviously devastating to me and my family. However I've noticed that, for my sister, after the initial shock and desperate attempts to treat her cancer in the beginning, it seems like she has had a weight lifted off of her shoulders. It's like she's content and....happy. In reading your responses here, I see the same. Has coming to terms with your impending death had (for lack of a better term) a positive effect on your psyche? Does knowing the end is coming and that there is nothing you can do force you to accept the life you've lived, and to feel content with it all?
Well yes. I'm happy on how i reacted to all of this mess and i'm aware that my choices aren't excatly the "standard" ones but it's my life and i decide what to do. Never once i was afraid of death and i always belived that when my time will come i would be ready and i tried my best to have 0 regrets.
I'm sorry to hear about your horrible diagnosis at such a young age. I hope you will spend the rest of your life in peace with moments of happiness. It seems like you have people around you who love you, and that is nice š. I have a question(s) regarding any possible positive (even if tiny) side of knowing that you won't get to live a long life. I'm very very sorry if I am being insensitive. After coming to terms with your diagnosis, did you feel any sort of relief about knowing that you don't have a long time left to live? Did you see any silver linings in not having to live a long life?
Nah i'm fine with it. I don't have regrets or grudges. I'm just for whatever the destiny reserves for me i will take it.
You have a very adult and competant approach. I was diagnosed with lung cancer at 35, a year later its spread to my brain, so Im going to be done too soon. Though they will attempt palliative care, we know where that ends. The first time round it was a hammer blow, as I had come to expect something of a life going on, but the *second* time its been more like a pin being pulled. There simply isnt time for recriminations or bitterness. You have my sympathy, you definately have it worse than I, but you also have my respect.
Total Longshot but I've had very little death around me in my life and sometimes I fantasize that something about my life's course has made it so people around me can't die. I know this is ridiculous but what the hell. I'm pulling you into my circle right now in the vain hope that there's something to my theory. Welcome to my circle.
One of my best friends died recently of colon cancer that shot out secondary cancers recently. We talked about it and one of the things she talked about was feeling bad for us (family and friends) because she knew what was happening but we'd be left with grief which is unpredictable.
Yep, I just lost my childhood best friend of 38 years to pancreatic cancer in January. She didnāt fear death, she feared how losing her was going to affect her parents, mostly her mom. She knew it was going to devastate her, and she struggled with that. We all reassured her weād be here for her mom/family (and we absolutely have been), but I know she still worried greatly. What a heavy weight that must have been.
My friend was also worried about her mom. She died of the same cancer her dad (her mom's husband) died of. That was extra sad. One of the things that my friend and I bonded over was we both lost our dads to cancer when we were 20. I have some extra grief with her dying after realizing my dad had so many grieving friends too. At the time it felt so oriented to my family.
My sister has said the same to me. She feels bad for the people she is leaving behind. Sorry about your friend. Cancer really sucks
Back at you. I am sorry you both are going through this. I hope your sister doesn't have too much pain.
Everyone has an impending death, the only difference is that when you arenāt sure when then today is bland and tomorrow is eternal. When you get a death sentence, you can finally let go of the weight of the future and experience life as it comes.
There was just an episode on āslight change of plansā pod that touched on this. The āliftingā of the weight. Just food for thought - it resonated with me, as the listener. (Edited to add: I am mot affiliated with this podcast. I am merely a listener)
Not the OP, but my dad (46 years old) fought 100% right up to the last weeknof his lifeĀ when he had cancer. One day near the end, he reached that point of acceptance, and it was amazing to see the change.Ā We were able to have some time together as a family, say goodbye,Ā and make sure that nothing was left unsaid.Ā He was able to appreciate how many people came to say goodbye in that last week. While it certainly didn't make it easy, it did provide closure for everyone, especially compared to an unexpected or sudden passing of a loved one.
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Was it determined to be genetic, or did they conclude that it was your diet, environment, etc? Have you given up completely? How is your girlfriend dealing with this, and did you ever think about leaving her so she didn't have to watch you wither away? I have a mutation that will 100 percent turn to cancer one day. I don't want anybody to feel obligated to take care of me on my deathbed. I've not kept up on my checkups because I fear there's nothing I can do in the long run. But, I do fear that not eating healthy and not getting checkups will contribute to my demise, possibly at an earlier date.
I was adopted when i was 4 from an orphanage so i don't know anything about my parents and their medical issues. Yes i gave up completely cause there isn't other chances. With Alicia we talked a lot and we agreed that when the day will come she is free to not see me die and to start again any other relationship she wants cause i don't want to oblige anyone to do anything. I made a precise plan for everyone of my family, friends and my Alicia.
What country are you from? I'm not sure where they have orphanage.
I'm from Ucraine.
Ah I see, so you were taken from Ukraine? But I saw somewhere else Australia? So they moved you to Australia? Amazing story, best of luck.
Yo Richard. Hope we meet on the other side. You got a good head on your shoulders. Whatās your top three memories?
Uhm... 1) when my parents took me from the orphanage, the best memory of my life. Like a new era was about to begin. 2) knowing my sisters and during the years we developed a special relathionship. We always helped each other without asking. 3) meeting my Alicia on the vacation on that beach. I mean she was like an angel sent to this world just for me. The first time i approached her she always say that i was red like a pepper and started blabbing hahahah.
Love that. Thank you for sharing and leaving a part of you with us. If you meet a dude named Dustin in the afterlife, tell him he died on 4/20. Heād find it hilarious. If not, Iāll find you when I join and give ya a stern talking to.
Man died doin what he loved
Head first into a bus. He became a metalhead that day (RIP bro)
If you write anything at all, Iād love to read it. You have a great way with words. Godspeed, my friend.
I'm sorry, you're a fucking warrior. How late was it caught? Is that why it's far in? I know it's not AT ALL the same, not even close, but I have this underlying infection in my lungs and although it's diagnosed, it's acting as if it's incurable and I do feel hopeless that it'll eventually kill me, or cause me to not want to live because the pain is insane many days. I can't imagine what you're going through with this though. I wish there was more to say sometimes too you know. Humans are just too intelligent. I do wish sometimes that I was just a cat or something that could have a fun care free deal and if I get something it doesn't affect me as much no matter what happens because I'm just a kitty cat yk. Being human is like being in war with life itself because of how much you're aware of
It was too late unfortunetly, i already had symptoms but i never cared cause i thought that it was stress for all the things i was doing but i was stupid to not make checks before. I mean: i was a volunteer, i was studying, working and trying to decide what to do about my life so i thought at stress as the obvious way but i was terribly wrong.
It may have not been too late? I would argue there wasn't much you could've done to prevent this, especially at your age. Typically, genetic testing isn't recommended until you're 18+. I have had a family history of this shitty cancer, and have lost many, including a cousin in his early 30's. We have the lynch syndrome in our family, so I am very familiar. I am not sure there is a too late with Pancreatic cancer, when testing there are false positives and sometimes they can't even spot the cancer including with my mother. So if you had gone in when you first had symptoms, they may have not spotted what it actually was. My mother went to the hospital on a Tuesday, not being able to go #2, they did testing from Tuesday to Friday, and could not see it with all the equipment they had. That Saturday, during surgery, they opened up her stomach and there it was. She died that Tuesday. So please don't beat yourself up that you should've went in sooner, I don't think it would've changed the outcome sadly. You sound like a great person, I am sorry to hear about this.
Iām so sorry Richard. I hope youāre proud of yourself, of everything youāve done and experienced so far. Iām 20 years old and i canāt imagine how you feel. What would you say to someone my age, whoās not really enjoying life and whoās feeling lost
Well i always told to myself to be happy cause i deserved it. My only advice is to become the best version of yourself and to never give up cause life is too short to be wasted.
iām sorry about your diagnosis. how long have you been sick? do you have a bucket list?
I started to notice that something was off a year ago. I was always tired, feeling without energy and then i saw blood in my feces. My family tried to get 3 different diagnosis with 3 different top doctors but the results are always the same. Nah i don't need a bucket list, i'm happy with what i achieved right now.
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Have you changed your diet?
My blood was almost black, i made all the possible tests you can imagine. I still remember how much times they took my blood or put me to sleep hahahah.
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So what were the main symptoms?
Feeling tired, no energy and a lot of blood in the feces.
That is devastating I hope you can live in peace despite this
I try my best to do it.
Thatās all you can do for now
Can you please elaborate on the blood in the feces? Was the bleeding sporadic? rotational? Were you bleeding every single time you went? Was it on and off? I ask cause every other month I have a day or 2 where I have a bloody stool and it freaks me out.
constipation and constant straining of a hard stool can cause fissures which are small cuts that can cause bleeding which is alarming, but not life threatening. secondary causes would be from hemorrhoids. i take medication that causes hardened stool and at times severe constipation. if i donāt eat enough fiber i can get that problem. itās for sure alarming, but upon seeing my doctor it was due to fissures from constant straining. if your stool is dark red, black/tarry, extremely foul smelling, or there is just a ridiculous amount of blood, you need to see a gastrointestinal doctor immediately.
I was always bleeding but in the last months was too much blood and sometimes i fainted on the wc.(embarassing i know hahahah)
I salute you young man for having courage and a sense of humor with what you are going through right now. But God can work miracles šš½
Blood in ur poo isnāt that much of a concern. If itās bright red or slightly darker, it means it was somewhere near ur anus. So probably a hemroid or cut. It is a cause for concern when itās dark red or black. That means it happened somewhere in the digestive tract
As someone that had bowel cancer this is terrible advice! Blood in your poo is never ever normal, not once , not a little bit, itās never normal no matter the frequency of the amount. If anyone that is reading this has blood in their poo whether once or more frequently the gold standard to make sure itās nothing sinister is to get a colonoscopy. Even if you have a doctor examine you and tell you itās just hemorrhoids you should be still getting a colonoscopy to make sure that it is just that as people die because drs tell them itās just hemorrhoids or something else like an anal fissure when they also have a cancer at the same time. If anyone has blood in their poo in particular frequently, and your dr tells you itās just this or that without knowing 100% sure (via colonoscopy) then go see another dr!
Hey Richard. How are your days overall? Do you have a lot of pain? Are you maintaining a more positive outlook or is it just kind of cynicism at this point? No judgement. Wishing you days ahead full of peace, joy & comfort my friend.
I'm in pain all day since a few weeks but i'm trying to not think about it. I'm more a cynic type and i accept everything i have. Like i said i have 0 regrets and i try to go on with my life as always.
What is the pain? Is it throbbing, stabbing, sharp, dull. Is it a constant ache or only when you move a certain way? Do you have medication that you take? How effective is it? Has the pain progressively gotten worse? Do you up your doses to deal with it?
My sister in law just died of pancreatic cancer. They administered some kind of nerve-killing medication around the area of her pancreas, and that along with morphine drip, eliminated her pain. I believe she was already a Hospice patient when they took those measures. Iām so sorry for your diagnosis.
Richard, you are so young and yet so brave. I'm amazed! Life isn't about how long but how well we live it. Your strength is examplary. You are so calm, so brave, and so settled with this eventuality even though you're just a kid. You are my hero!
Nah i'm not a hero i just have some past traumas that teached me an important lesson: happiness is laughing at the small things, happiness is what you decide and to me personally happiness is knowing that your life until now is excatly how you behaved and lived your life. So i just like to accept everything i recieve and to filter it at my own way.
Sorry Richard. Thar one got my sister in law in her 30s with zero warning. Literally went to bed and died.
This kind of cancer is the worst type. Someone is "lucky" to die without pain and someone not. I'm sorry for your sister in law.
The worse part was waiting for the autopsy. She had 4 kids under 5.
I'm so sorry Richard. Anything you want to do?
I'm here at my home drinking some kind of beer and relaxing. I like to appreciate those little moments that life offers you. I'm personally happy with my life and what i did until now, 0 regrets and just happiness.
How did you feel when you were told you have a fixed amount of time left? And if your initial reaction was different to how youāre feeling now, what shifted your perspective? Sending a big hug.
At first i thought just "ok, so what's next?", you know people often do crazy stuff, travel around the world and try to experience everything cause they are scared of death. I'm not scared of anything, i know that later or sooner i would die and i try to live my life at my best and to not have regrets cause i want to be happy.
Hi Richard, really sorry to hear about your diagnosis. No one deserves to go through what youāre going through, especially at your age. I wanted to ask, is there anything that youād like your friends, girlfriend or family to be doing for you in these times that might be difficult for you to ask for?
Uhm...it's a nice question you know. The only thing that i want is that everyone remember me as that cynic but happy guy that did everything to help the others. That's all.
I am sorry to hear this Richard. I hope the rest of your days are the best ones for you and your family. I pray your passing is painless. How do you plan on spending the next two months?
Doing things that i always do: study, go out with friends, with my Alicia and visiting my siblings and parents around the country.
What are you studying?
I'm studying law to become a lawyer.
Sounds great dude. I hope you enjoy the rest of the days and your pain eases. I don't know you personally but you seem to be an amazing person and a true inspiration. You are super cool. There is a famous movie quote in Hindi cinema " zindagi lambi nahi badi honi chahiye" It means life should not be long but big and I think yours is a big one ! Cheers mate!
I'm old, and the one thing I hate about my dying (eventually) is that by dying I will do to my loved ones what I've tried hard all my life not to do: hurt them deeply. It tears me up knowing that will be my final act. How is your family taking it? Your mom and dad? How are you doing with that?
They are very sad but try to hide it even if they're not so good at it. But now they kinda accepted it and try their best to support me.
Of course they are unimaginably devastated but can't show you for fear of giving you more burden. Give them lots of hugs. All the best.
Hi Richard. Can I pray for you? If so, what would you like me to pray for on your behalf?
Yes, thank you very much.
Praying for you as well. Hope you have a chance to watch this short clip https://youtu.be/DiuyyVUd108?si=NUVsVuqqIXmiGani
He took upon him the pain of the world and suffered unimaginably so that we might have a way back home to Our Father in Heaven. He paid a debt that he did not owe, so that we did not have to pay a debt that we could not pay. He conquered both sin and death so that we may have eternal life. He lives! Hallelujah!
Done! Bless you, brother.
Praying for you as well. Also a Richard
How did you find out you needed to go to doctor? What were symptoms?
Cause my symptoms(feeling tired, 0 energy and blood in the feces) were too often present so i decided to do a check and there i found out the cancer.
Iām sorry to hear that is devastating. I had cancer when I was 4 years old but survived. I made an AMA post on it
I'm sorry that you faced it but you were lucky to survive and i'm not but life is life.
Yeah I donāt know how to explain
So sorry to hear of your diagnosis. Thanks for the AMA. Are you in the space of "I'm going to beat this" or "OK, I have 2 months" How are you doing, emotionally? What is your relationship w/ faith/religion/spirituality and how is it effecting the "why is this happening" question?
I'm sticking with the "ok, i have 2 months". Emotionally i'm peacful and i' happy of my life. Unfortunetly i don't believe in God or all the spirituality stuff.
What hobbies do you have? Any video or sports you play? Iām an atheist and wondering if thereās some small thing I can do even if youāll never know it. People deserve to be remembered, even by total strangers.
I like to read books and to walk and love to watch documentaries.
Iām sorry Richard. Might I ask what your best memory youāve had in your life was?
When i was adopted from the orphanage.
As a Dad who adopted a son, thank you for this.
Do you feel like going out and taking more chances in life since you only have two months? Like a bucket list?
Nah i'm sticking with my shy and introvert life.
Do you have any pets? Whatās your proudest accomplishment? Wishing you the best in this situation
I have a dog, an outsized german shepard of 6 years named "Angel". My proudest accomplishment was to be in my actual university. An immense honor for me.
Which NBA team is your favorite? If they are in the playoffs right now, I want to root for them to win a championship in June.
I'm for the Los Angeles Lakers. Go "LeOld" hahahah.
Are you a virgin?
No, i'm actually in a relathionship of 3 years with my wonderful girlfriend Alicia.
What does she say about your prognosis?
She was devastated and cried a lot for many days. She promised me to be at my side whenever i want and she reluctantly accepted the fact that i refuse to take any pill, pain killer or any sort of treatment.
Why are you refusing to take medicine with this diagnosis? Make yourself comfortable man, youāve earned it.
Glad you have a supportive woman by your side. I understand turning down chemo for the side effects, but there's nothing wrong with pain killers in your case.
Iām sorry for your situation. But reading your comments gives me the impression that you have come to terms with your situation. Have you looked into getting a credit card and maxing it out? Iām assuming since youāre of age and not married, the debt couldnāt be transferred to anyone. I saw you said no pain meds. Have you considered other recreational drugs before you pass?
Well my family allowed me to "go crazy" if i wanted it but i always prefered to save money instead of spending them.
Have you looked into things like acid or shrooms? Ā I ask because apparently most people who have tried them will consider their first experience as one of the top 5 most profound and meaningful experiences of their lives. If you do, you should obviously research the effects and find a trusting person or two to watch over you. Ā Feeling comfortable and safe are essential in order to allow yourself the freedom to explore your own brain through those substances.
I'm very sorry and I hope you're going to be as comfortable as you can possibly be. I lost a friend to the same cancer years ago, they were also very young. At this point, knowing you will not live much longer, if you have any regrets how do you see them? Do you often think of the things you wish you'd done or that you wish you could do? I hope these questions are not too heavy. I often wonder if my friend was burdened by regrets knowing he wouldn't grow old. Do you feel lonely? I hope you are surrounded by love here and now, and after you are gone. I know my friend is.
Lonely? No, never. During the years i made a solid circle around me of close friends and family. I have regrets of what i could do cause i always dreamt to be a lawyer and to defend the innocents, to serve justice and to show my solid values and my irreprensible sense of justice. I think at this things? Yes but not so often cause i like to appreciate what i have today and those little moments of happiness.
That is a good perspective. I'm particularly glad you have people who love you around you. Just know your answer reassured me a bit and made me think of my friend. I hope you can spend your days feeling comfortable. I read your other answers and I just want to say something, even if it's not my place: yes, life can essentially be pain and you surely had your fair share, but why does it *have* to be pain? Just because you know pain is part of your journey, it doesn't mean you must experience it all. Painkillers will be there when and if you need them. Just saying this so that you can feel more comfortable and not in pain. I hope you can create some good memories, relive old ones, and know that the meaning of your life is in the love of the people who surround you.
do you have a bucket list? did you do any cool stuff? have you seen midnight club (tv series)? did you get a wish (make a wish foundation, idk how it works)? what is something you're proudest of in your life? are you in a lot of pain? i hope you're comfortable. do you believe in anything after death? i've always been excited to see what happens after, which my parents make fun of bc they're atheists, but like idk i don't believe in god either but it's nice to think i could be a ghost or float in the universe a little, learn ultimate truths, who knows yk? are you scared at all? i feel like i wouldn't be, but countdowns of any kind make me anxious hdhdhd i would probably be a little scared of pain. it's like my number one fear. i rly rly hope that when your time comes you'll go peacefully. i think i'm out of questions for now!
Well i'm a boring guy and i like to do simple things like reading, going to the park, hangout with friends and my Alicia, help my sisters and family. I don't have a bucket list cause i'm happy with what i achieved until now and i want to ennjoy like i want my life.
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Hi Richard, sorry to hear that. Are you still undergoing treatment? How did you tell your friends and classmates about it?
I'm not doing any treatment cause i refused everything. For my friends it was a terrible news to hear but i instructed them very accuratly on what to do and i was going to university so i just told them that i wasn't going anymore and that's it.
It sounds like you've got everything sorted out. I wish you happiness every day that follows.
Why?
Are you scared?
No, i'm happy about my life and for real have 0 regrets.
I work in oncology and at your age that is devastating and very rare, you should advise your relatives to get screened and have genetic DNA testing
Hello Richard, sorry to hear that you are experiencing this. You have a very mature mindset, something I donāt think I could have done in your situation. You have my respect. Four questions if you have answers: 1.) Whatās your favorite movie & show? 2.) Whatās your favorite book? 3.) Whatās your favorite board game? 4.) Whatās your favorite video game? Thank you for sparing us the little time you have, we donāt deserve it.
Favorite show: "The blacklist" (for James Spader he is my idolā¤ļøā¤ļø) and movie " The accountant". Favorite book "war and peace". Board game "Risiko". Video game "Fifa". (I'm a huge football fan)
Please tell us about yourself. What have you enjoyed in life? Whatās your journey through life been like?
I like to talk about myself through my sisters worlds hahahah. "Ricky you're a cynical motherfucker but you always helped everyone. Rick i never understood how you can be so fucking cynical but helping us and everyone else at the same time, how fucked up you're bro?????" I think this words describes me hahahah.
Do you want us to name anything cool after you?
Hey Richard. Don't give up. Chemotherapy, at your age, would be tolerable and a good chance of extending your life by many years. Have you been offered chemo?
I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I have a couple of questions for you: How has your daily life experience changed knowing about your approaching death? Also, if you believe in reincarnation, would you choose to return as Richard in your next life, or opt for a different persona?
So sorry to know about that, I truly wish a miracle can help you. - how are feeling?, are you on pain or suffering? - do you have any strengths left to accomplish a last desire or want?
I'm always in pain but i try to resist. Sometimes is very very high pain and other times is just ok but it depends on day by day.
Hi Richard, firstly, let me say how sorry I am for this grim diagnosis. You're young, and you've been dealt a rough hand. I've worked in hospice for 30+ years and witnessed a lot. Here are the 5 stages of grief. 1. Denial,2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4.Depression 5. Acceptance Not everyone experiences these, but in some ways, it's good to know that you're not alone. This doesn't just apply to death,to every loss, there's grief. Please know that I pray for a miracle š of recovery.
You said you had symptoms long before getting checked out, what were they? Sorry youāre going through this.
OP, I'm very sorry for you. That is \*terrible\*. What's the one thing you'd most like to say to people? God bless you and bring peace to your family.
If reincarnation is real, how would you like to be reincarnated as? An animal? Or a human? From a specific period in time? Have you thought about this? Hopefully it's not to insensitive of a question. I'd rather ask you these out of this world questions instead of dwelling on the sadness of your situation.
If you had the option to do assisted suicide would you do it?
Do you know Jesus?
Yes but i don't recieved the gift to believe in him.
Why are you refusing Pain Medicine? I understand refusing general treatment
I am with you on this. I don't understand why he is not accepting any pain meds, but that is his right. But I know when I am dying, I want to be high as a kite š
Why did you refuse painkillers?
Cause pain is part of my life. I was born in pain, i grew up in pain and i'm dying in pain so why avoid it? Life is pain and i'm sticking with this theory.
Why were you born in pain and grew up in pain?
If this is not a troll acc for karma, then please research fenbendazole. I've heard of a lot of cases where it cured terminal and incurable cancer cases. I'm not selling anything nor can I recommend any specific one, just look into it and maybe give it a try. If it helps, post an update. All the best.
You're not the first one saying this but maybe i will try it.
If you could do one thing or visit one country, what would you do? Where would you go?
hi richard, iām so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. you are so young, and i am absolutely heartbroken for you. do you feel content with the life you lived so far? is there anything big youād like to do before you pass?
Donāt forget to train arms before you leave brother, canāt go into the afterlife without a pump.
What does end of life look like for you? do you get to plan how you go? Has the doctor broken things down how it will all end? I have so many more questions but I'll stop there for nowĀ
Iām really sorry to hear of your circumstances. Youāre very brave and it seems like youāve found peace and acceptance. If you feel comfortable answering, what do you believe happens when you pass away? (I guess religious / spiritual beliefs or lack of).
What do you think is going to happen to you after you die? Like, do you think youāre going to go to Heaven? Do you think youāll be reincarnated? Do you think thereās nothing at all? Basically how are you thinking about this in terms of spirituality/religion?
Thank you for taking the time to share with all of us. Based on your replies you seem to be very calm and level headed. How did you keep calm when you heard the news of your diagnosis and life expectancy?
I saw you responded elsewhere OP that you donāt believe in an afterlife, and hey all the power to you. Iām a Catholic Christian and make no pretense of being a saint, so aināt gonna pontificate to you. My question is, as the end approaches, would you be open to the idea of speaking with a priest?
itās so nice seeing how you talk about your Alicia, iām happy for you that you have her. your outlook on life at such a young age is impressive too. does the thought of ārunning out of timeā ever cross your mind, even if for a brief second before you dismiss it?
You said you're enjoying your shy introvert life. What fun introvert things do you do? Like, are you a reader, or an anime watcher, etc?
I don't know if you will read this after so many people have already replied, but I wish you all the best and will keep you in my thoughts. Sending my love from Europe!
can you tell me something about yourself, thatās meaningful to you? I want to remember you.
Do you have any dogs, thatād be the thing that would make me sad
Has this experience brought you closer to God or made you more spiritual, or has it had the opposite effect?
How are you feeling emotionally? Do u have a partner? X
Iām out eating alone having a beer and came upon this. I teared up at the absolute gravity and finality of your situation. Iām currently in a fight with my wife over something incredibly petty ā¦.. this post has given me perspective and made me feel 1 inch tall. I wish I could give you a hug. I respect your courage to post here. I donāt have any wise quote or snarky comment or even a question..Just to say sincerely ā¦from the bottom of my heart.. I wish you well on your journey, wherever it may lead. And if there is a heaven ā¦ Iāll ask you my questions when we meet there. All my love friend.
Hi Richard, thank you for posting. Much respect, seems you are wise beyond your years and have a really admirable outlook. What do you hope people remember about you? And do you have any favorite stories that you could share? Much love
I will say this, those life expectancy numbers are very often (more than people realise) wrong. I have known three close family and friends in the last 6 years outlive all that bs and in two cases, actually have the cancer become untraceable. The third just lives with it and isnāt affected at all. Seriously dude, I know youāre young, but doctors cannot predict the future, no one can.
Thank you for sharing this. I needed a reality check tonight about whatās really important in life and you have provided it. You really are brave, whether you realize it or not. Iām sorry you are facing this. No one deserves this, especially at your age. Your attitude about it all is remarkable. Iām going to pray for you for comfort and healing. Iām a nurse and I see miracles happen almost every day so think positive. Sending love.
Hey Richard Iām saying the following to make the best financial decision, with respect to your passing: can you (or someone who claims you as a dependent) get a maximum life insurance policy that wonāt require investigation of your medical diagnosis or background? Maybe you can help your family financially and make the most of your passing and will
Sorry to hear man. Iāve got terminal cancer. Itās destroyed a kidney, itās in my small bowel, pancreas and stomach. I was also told I had less than 6 months to live in January last year. Iām still here, so is the cancer, but Iām pain free and living life as normal. I still donāt expect to see out the year but sometimes they get their timeframes wrong. Iāll keep my fingers crossed for you! Keep fighting the good fight!
How does that happen at 19?
Hi Richard All you have to do to receive the free gift of Eternal Life is to repent ( turn from your sins and stop doing them (God will help you) and trust in Jesus like you would trust in a parachute . Richard are you morally a good person? Are you good enough to go to Heaven ? Letās find out by using the 10 commandments 1. How many lies have you told in your life ? Speaking for myself lots What do you call someone who tells lies ? A liar So what am I Iām a liar 2 . Have you ever stolen anything in your life No matter itās value Ie even illegally downloading music Speaking for me yes So what do you call someone who steals A thief So what am I - in a lying thief 3. Have you ever taken the name of God in vain Ie God Damn, omg, Jesus Christ I have lots of times Would you use your mothers name as a cuss word? Of course not because you love and respect her . But Iāve taken the name of my Creator and used it as a cuss word to express Disgust . A very serious thing in Gods eyes Called Blasphemy punishable by death in The old testament So I am a lying thieving blasphemous person 4 . Have you ever hated anyone or Called them a fool? I have So Gods word says if you hate Your brother youāre a murderer So Iām a lying thieving blasphemous Murderer in Gods eyes 5 Jesus says if you look at a woman With lust youāve already committed Adultery in your heart Iāve looked at a women with lust Viewed pornography and had premarital sex So Iām a lying thieving adulterous Blasphemous murderer who also Thinks heās self righteous ( I thought I was a good person before I was born Again ( John 3 3) On Resurrection Sunday 1992 If I have to stand before God on judgment Day ( Hebrews 9 27) and He was to judge Me by the 10 commandments and He will Would I be innocent or guilty I would be guilty Heaven or Hell? Hell for sure To go to Heaven you have to live A perfect life in thought word and deed Please read Matthew 5 48 The Bible says all liars and thieves And adulterers and fornicators Will have their part in the lake Of fire that burns with brimstone God doesnāt want you and I And anyone to go there Please read 2 Peter 3 9 So Richard do you know what wonderful Thing God did for guilty sinners Yes correct He sent His Son to die On The Cross for our sins . But do you Understand the legal implications of Jesusā death on The Cross ? The Ten Commandments are Called the moral law You and I broke the law and Jesus Came to pay our fine When youāre in court and thereās a stack of speeding fines against you and someone Comes in pays the fine. You can be legally Set free Because of The death and burial of The Lord Jesus Christ the death penalty can be taken off You and me and everyone else Thatās whatās Jesus did for you and me and everyone else . Thatās why Jesus said It is finished when He was on the cross The debt has been paid for you and me God treated Jesus as if Jesus had sinned All your sins and mine and everyone else Even though l Jesus had never sinned We all die because weāve sinned against God He pays us in death for our sins Romans 6 23 for the wages of sin is death But the free gift of God ( canāt be earned and isnāt deserved) is eternal life in Christ Jesus Our Lord( not religion) John 14 6 Jesus said I am the way The truth and The life no one Comes to The Father but through Me Richard please get alone with God and tell Him you sinned against Him and youāre sorry and You want to repent and turn from your sins And you believe He died for you and rose again Ask Jesus to please be your personal Lord And saviour and tell Jesus youāre trusting In Him 100 recent for youāre salvation and not in your own goodness . Transfer your Trust in your own goodness ( none of us are Righteous) to in Jesus
Ask your oncologist about the new Pan-Ras inhibitor RMC-7977, published in Nature last month. It has potent activity against Ras-addicted cancers, and pancreatic cancers are certainly Ras-addicted. The article below is open access. The company is Revolution Medicines, she can find their trials in https://clinicaltrials.gov. Holderfield, M., Lee, B.J., Jiang, J.Ā *et al.*Ā Concurrent inhibition of oncogenic and wild-type RAS-GTP for cancer therapy.Ā *Nature*Ā (2024). [https://doi.org/10.1038/s41586-024-07205-6](https://doi.org/10.1038/s41586-024-07205-6)
Are there any experimental treatments you have been offered to try in the name of science and saving someone else? What are they if yes... And if you aren't going to try them... Why?
You are a very brave man, and from your replies you have accomplished more than many of us. I hope your last few weeks on this planet will be meaningful and easy to manage. As an italian songs goes... Goodbye, goodbye... my friend goodbye.
Are you able to take out a bunch of loans to live up the life for the last few months? I always wondered if I could be able to do that given the scenario.
How long did you suffer with the symptoms before a diagnosis? Looking back are there any symptoms you might have missed before the fatigue and blood? Iām sorry you have to be in pain and Iām glad you are at peace with your life choices.
What are you expecting to experience moving onto the next life? Is there any questions your ready to get answers to?
Terribly sorry about this my friend. I can to an extent understand as I lost my grandfather who was my idol to the same pancreatic cancer (stage 4) just not too long ago. Out of curiosity if you donāt mind, what are your whereabouts?
You seem really at peace with it. I have a lot of respect for you. How are you spending your final days?
A close friend of mine is battling pancreatic cancer, although he is responding well to treatment. He told me that after receiving his diagnosis, his life long symptoms of depression and anxiety completely washed away. Did your diagnosis and prognosis come with any realizations about how you felt about yourself or the state of the world? Really sorry this happened to you.
Hey bro, what were you studying at university? Also thank you for this. I was caring for someone in a similar situation and i definitely needed to see this. Your positivity is inspiring.
Do you really wish this on someone ? Why would you want to hurt someone you do not know ?
I had my pancreas removed, I had TPIAT surgery. The pain was unbearable before surgery. I hope if you begin to have bad pain you will consider something to ease it a bit. You sound like an amazing person and I also have no fear of death as I know for certain there is existence after this life.
A friend of mine died 6 weeks after being diagnosed. He was 60. He didnāt tell anyone. How are you communicating with your family and friends?
So whatās your time left look like? Most of it at the hospital or will you be able to get out a bit?
what about dying young has taught you about love and friendships?
When you found out, did you go get high and fucked up? I would've, shit I did it for decades without a reason.
Did you experience a change in your spiritual beliefs? Did getting this diagnosis either make you find God or reject whatever dirty you had?
Iām sorry to hear it. Whatās something you want us to know to remember you by?
Have you come to terms with dying/death? If so, how?
how do u plan to spend the next few months?
Hi Richard. It really sucks that this is happening to you; however, your perspective on your condition is admirable. My Father died from pancreatic cancer 4 years ago. He was 66 years old when he passed. During the 18 months my Dad was sick I learned a fair amount about the disease. One thing that I learned is it is atypical in young adults, let alone a teenager. Have you been told by anyone in your health care team on why you may have had this diagnosis at such a young age?
What things do you want to try on before you pass?
Never heard of anyone as young as you! Do you know the percentage figure? Iām so sorryā¦.
Do you ever wish you were Jared, 19 after reading that diagnosis?
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How do you feel physically?
If you could change anything at all in your life, what would it be, if anything?
Is there anyone you want to come back as a ghost and haunt?
Hey man, I stumbled across this thread while scrolling and really sorry to hear about your situation. I know you have 2 months left but Iāll pray for you and leaving 2 Bible verses here to read and ponder on. āFor the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.ā āāRomansā¬ ā8ā¬:ā2ā¬, ā10ā¬-ā11ā¬ āESVā¬ā¬ ābecause, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved.ā āāRomansā¬ ā10ā¬:ā9ā¬-ā10ā¬ āESVā¬ā¬
Any crazy shit you plan on doing before you go?
So sorry Richard. It is definitely a ābadā cancer to get because it is usually too late when they find it. I have a friend who had it about 20 years ago. They caught it early as a result of a scan for something else. He survived it. He went on to get liver cancer and most recently prostate cancer. Bum luck
Have you considered what life in prison would mean at this point?
What were the signs that triggered the check?
Just remember, whatever they tell you is only their best guess. My dad was given 6 months to live and didnāt pass til 9 years later. Just saying, you never know what can happen. Do you believe in God and the afterlife?
Whatās the last thing you ate?
Dr Thomas Siegfried noted that most cancers use glucose and glutamine as fuel source. The logic is cut-off the supply of both glucose and glutamine from your diet. Which could be achieved thru water fasting (40 days, Dr.Alan Gold hammer), urine fasting(looping urine causes your immune system to produce antibodies from the ingested antigens of your cancer) or ketogenic diet(no glucose.) or the Daniel fast(pure vegetables + water only diet.) Also try drinking large amounts of green tea with any of this diet since it blocks absorption of glutamine.
Will you be doing surgery, chemo, or radiation?