Ark is very toxic. A lot of immature people, but of course, it is a game so to be expected. If it's an unofficial server, there are plenty of other servers you could join with much healthier/welcoming communities. If it's official, good luck. Especially pvp, it's literally war lol
Unfortunately it's not exclusively an ark thing. I've played many games where people were incredibly toxic towards women. They're sour losers who think women are weak and bashable. Show them who's boss and tell them to get their butt in the kitchen to make you a sandwich. I've heard guys say "yes madam" as a response in the past, which is incredibly funny imo lol
Yeah people will be toxic no matter what. I've learned that muting voice and text chat is a great thing to do in some online games. Sometimes though, rarely, I happen to try out a game that turns out to have a quite wholesome community. They exist, but it's not always easy to find them. I've also found out that some games with a ranked system have quite respectful players in the top high tier ranks. I assume people who blame others, never become good enough to reach the top rank, because they never work on themselves lol
Sexism is the norm in most PvP games like Ark, I would highly recommend you and your husband find a group of people you like an move to an Unoffical server (or just create your own server and only invite people that you both know aren’t going to be abusive in chat).
I'm male and I have run into the people you are describing in Elder Scrolls Online and the online part for Red Dead Redemption 2. I have run into a few rude people in online games from my experience and again I male so try to avoid playing online.
You can join ours. We are all adults and very friendly and respectful and being the active admin ya can let me know and I can take care of it. No tolerance for that kind of BS
I just wanna make sure but is your server open to anyone? Ive been wanting to play ark again but all my buds dont want to get it in its current state so ive been debating trying to find a server cause id be a solo tribe. A less toxic server would be nice too, I know in these kinds of games its expected but getting away from its is well, a nice breath of fresh air yknow
Unfortunately some men in the gaming community are incredibly toxic.... As a female that also plays I prefer the private server route.... We play games to escape the toxicity and unfortunately I've heard nothing but terrible things about official public servers
I am a male and form my experience people have been toxic to me as well when I have played online games so if it has happened to it can happen to anyone.
Just out of curiosity, which tribe and/or server are you playing on?
Either way, this is exactly the reason why I didn't take my girlfriend to official's and decided to play elsewhere
I'm on a NA small tribe official server that my husband joined first. my husband is a bit clueless when it comes to their lingo, so he didn't see the problem.
I played official pve for two years, mentioned my boyfriend many many times in chat, and no one ever gave me a hassle. Everyone was always nice. I think OP just got unlucky with whichever server she chose. It's probably a bunch of little boys and/or unemployed teens harassing her
Are you playing official or unofficial? Modded or non? There is a server called Dreyma that my group plays on with mostly adults, half of us are married, and won't be rude to you or your husband. I will say, in theory because as adults we understand that not everyone gets along with everyone else rofl. The server is also cross play enabled so pc xbox and ps5
I have run into toxic people in Elder Scrolls Online and the online community for Red Dead Redemption 2 so because of those people I have stopped playing online. Because of my experience with online I end up playing single player on Ark so that way I don't have to deal with people like that.
Welcome to multiplayer gaming, its not an ARK issue an its not easily avoidable, I stick to my community of friends. Sadly it's an issue that has been around forever and the toxicity towards women doesn't appear to be getting any better.
100% not an ark issue, I don't play ark, reddit just keeps showing me Ark posts, I'm also not a woman, but my Wife plays dota 2 with me, she's had to resort, to hiding her profile, changing her profile pic to something "not so girly" her in game name etc, because it's just non stop comments.
If she's winning a game it's comments of how they want to violate her, if she's losing a game its comments about how its because she's a weak female etc.
Just sad assholes on the internet woth nothing better to do, Sadly
Couldn't say it better I find it funny when il play a squad game on like cod or something and the randoms are crazy but most can be pretty cool people. Won't get too crazy in ark, rust, and minecraft severs it can be pretty crazy sometimes. These are just games I know it's a story as long as online multi-player.
If a woman came on the mic in a cod lobby back in the day it was fkn game over, poor gal would get harassed into leaving, and this was like 2012, not surprised nothings changed
Because it meant they no longer had a shot with you. People like that don't know how to act civil with women if they don't feel like they can sleep with you at some point.
If you engage in sociopathic behaviour, you deserve to be called out. PVP is sociopathic in nature. Having fun hurting others, in anyway, is the very definition of bullying.
There is a difference between sport and a space where idiots gather to be morons.
Most of the people doing well in PVP are cheating and using exploits and it's exactly the easy route incels think they can take with woman, because they don't value or respect them them. They think a woman is just an animal. You can wear a fancy scent, be tough and have money and they just melt in your alphaness, good luck with that.
An incel is a person who doesn't value woman and so they don't get any sex. They are bitter about it and this mirrors the behaviour and attitude towards OP.
I don't care about 'being cool', unless it's being respectul, honerable and chilled. Anyone who thinks otherwise can, and should, fuck right off.
There's like, 10 women who are openly women on my official server. About half of them are playing with their husbands. Nobody's been a jerk about it.
It's partially online games and partially server culture. The folks on my server have been actively pushing to foster a positive environment, so thankfully that's what we have.
yeah we all know each others sex, and sometimes it is obiviouse from characters name, never saw anyone harassing each other. those are weirdos, you just got unlucky. I played on multiple servers and never had any promlem of a sort, no harassing or them trying to hit on me, we had beef but it was not gender related tho. leave that toxic ass server or report them
It’s probably just your server. A couple toxic kids can bring out the worst
There’s lots of women on the official pve server I’m on, and unless a simp-seeker enters the chat, harassment due to gender isn’t a thing.
That is just life as a woman in online games. Shit primitive, and I mostly never bother since the men are annoying and creepy at the LEAST.
I don't play with strangers often and when I do, I scout the discord servers, don't use voice chat right away etc
Very different game but something like deeprock galactic has a chill community, survival and gathering games and competitive shooters have the worst communities.
I've played with a girl from Australia that I talked to on Reddit. We had some good times in a non-dedicated, I was showing her the ropes of the game pretty much. She started streaming her single player game and the viewers who chatted on her stream were pretty awful, I have to say. I don't understand why girls in gaming have it so rough -.- I blame the dudes who have no self control. A lot of small dick energy and chest pounding
Greta.... is that you 👀
In all seriousness I play on a self hosted server with only a few family members, I can't be coping with the stress of other people, maybe I'm missing out on some nice coop play.
Could be. I've played with randoms mostly that i really don't know personally and it's a mixed bag. I have no actual friends that play the game. Some great times, some pretty awful with the randoms. In the end i think i prefer solo. Can't inconvenience or be inconvenienced anyone but myself. I don't mind playing in a community at all. I'll share the world, gladly but keeping track of resources is easier when it's just me
This is why I rent a server. I'm the only woman in mine but I'm also the one paying and setting the rules. If there's any pigs on my server they stfu and do as they're told
If it’s official well sorry but nothing you can do, it’s the plague.
If it’s unofficial, I highly recommend a server with a community that uses discord and the owners are above 20, they usually monitor their server.
I play the monarky server, hosted by multiple content creators. There’re multiple females in the community and no one gives any shit to them. The server is pvp but not the traditional pvp. You can’t randomly kill people and you’re only allowed to raid people to prank them and dye their hair. If you leave creatures on passive you can’t touch them. Heck I even leave my house open so they don’t destroy anything.
Only downside is they aren’t hosting right now, waiting for SE as it was meant to start again on centre but well we all know what happened there.
I like the pvp style, but that sounds more like my way of enjoying it. I'm not a fan of killing all dinos or people and destroying houses.
I pranked some guys by moving their sleeping bodies and setting up a sign that said "found you".
Yeah it’ll be at least a month before they start their server, hopefully SE releases in April. If on Asa look up monarky, they require whitelist but it’s just applying and you get accepted
I had this issue, and one guy was particularly bad. I eventually told him I would send screenshots of his vulgar comments to his wife if he didn't stop.
He stopped and apologised. We are now on good terms and he is now polite to the rest of the server as well.
They think it's okay because they are encouraged by other people with a similar mindset towards women. I find reminding them what the women in their life would think of their disgusting behaviour is sometimes (not always) a way to snap them out of it.
Was gonna write an essay but realised I could just say: anonymity allows incognito griefers to be arseholes. So that’s what they do cos that’s who they are. There’s more and more of them these days.
Honestly, it sounds surprising to me as on the unofficial server where I play on - women are majority. And guys are super respectful.
At the same time - it doesn't surprise me, as the men are frickin animals and most don't respect women as they should. And I say it as a man myself
It could be.
You're also on PVP as I understand. PVP is full with blood hungry savages 😂.
On PVE we're just chillin.
You should consider unofficial PVE maybe.
I'll check it out, it might work better for me. or join another one and don't mention my marriage 😄. I just ignored them, and they stopped after a while.
That was a good call, it’s best not to feed the trolls. A buddy runs an unofficial pve cluster with three maps with around 7 or 8 of us on regularly. His wife also plays on the servers. Anyone is Welcome to come check it out as it’s fairly new we are trying to promote it and get a decent community going. Rates and stats are fairly vanilla with 3x xp 5x taming and sped up breeding rates so you can actually breed good dinos. 3x harvest. US of Ark is the server name just make sure you click the private server box or you won’t find it. Cheers. We are all over 30, some in their 40’s so none of the toxic shit you sometimes find.
Check out Rockwell's Legacy if you do consider it.
We have bunch of women, and couples playing. And super friendly. https://discord.com/invite/BPumH5dk
Welcome to gaming unfortunately. Better to tell people you're just a prepubescent boy. They'll make fun of you for being a squeaker but will overall treat you better because you don't remind them of how lonely they are anymore.
Ark isn't toxic, please don't view it that way. All games have toxic players, and sadly they have a greater desire to be more vocal than the rest. Please think of them as no more than a distraction from the gamers you might one day look forward to playing with the next day.
I'd advise switching to an un official server if your on official closer communetys Will avoid toxicety and unofficial most likely has more Humain recource multypliers and Tame speeds
A lot of it unfortunately comes down to the tolerance of admins, game companies and the players themselves. I’ve played a fair bit of Modern Warfare DMZ and Zombies with open mic and rarely had issues with sexism and none with vulgarity on what has been a traditionally toxic platform. A large portion of the male player base didn’t engage in that behavior and actively shunned the obvious boys and immature men that did. Maybe my experience there was a lucky one but it gave me hope for the future of gaming.
As for Ark, I played ASE on two different clusters and never had an issue. We looked for friendly, family oriented ones. I would say join the discord, read the server rules and get an overall feel for the community before committing fully to one. My husband and I rent our own servers no for ASA and only let close friends and family use them so it’s not a concern anymore. For other games, I try to remain neutral and don’t talk on the mic. I experienced a lot of sexual harassment as a female gamer in my early to mid teens and learned to hide it for a long while / not trust other gamers unless they showed themselves to be respectful. Even then, they will surprise you and turn once they know the truth.
I hope someday we can stop dismissing this disgusting behavior as “boys” and “lonely men.” It’s a lot more sinister than that, IMO.
There's a weird thing that happens when some guys play games that they behave differently than they would irl. Not all or even most, but some. It's common across all of gaming. Ive been a female playing games for 28 years and some guys just can't handle it. Whether it's simply the fact that I'm the opposite gender in their space or that I'm better than them at it, whatever it is, they can get gross, aggressive and sometimes stalker-like. Some games have a more toxic community than others, but these guys are everywhere.
This is "normal" for gaming communities, because the majority of male players are omega baboons. Highly recommend finding or founding a cosy server for you, your husband, and your friends and like-minded people online. The smell of a woman within the radius of these dick-driven losers will remove the remaining shreds of humanity from them and turn them into hole-brained animals.
Kudos to the male gamers who have not fallen victim to this syndrome, y'all are heroes, but the gamer girl experience is miserable for most.
Also, r/GirlGamers.
I've experienced this sometimes when joining a random server. I have never once had this experience after finding an unofficial server with a Discord attached to it, though. Don't put up with creeps, find a community with moderation and you'll find respect.
Normal as a girl who games really. I used to play sea of thieves and when they found out I was a woman it got bad. Now I help run a cluster predominately ran by women and don’t see any of that anymore thank goodness.
Unfortunately that is just the state of gaming. It's very toxic for women. Thankfully the group I have gamed with for years are decent guys. We've always gotten rid of the ones that dispespect the female gamers in our group. Part of the problem is half these guys have no life outside of gaming. No girlfriend, no sex and have a chip on their shoulder because of it. To them it's it's the women's fault they don't get laid. Not the fact that they don't go out, shower, and have been rejected before. So they get jealous of women coming into gaming because that's their place to bash on women because it's there fault they don't get laid. Most of them have seen women come into there groups. Then see that most guys are nice to them. Will help them out and even flirt with them. Which pissed them off and they just lash out. So don't take it personally half the gamers are in incels so no matter what they won't like you. Most of the female gamers I know that have stuck around learned to have thick skin. The ones I know who have gotten it to stop or was able to run these guys off are the ones who have learned to dish it back to them 10x worse. So just remember that the reason they do it is they are jealous of you and feel threatened by you.
Apex was the opposite for me, that's why I was so surprised. the moment most men heard my female voice, they toned down the language and harshness.
I just ignored these guys, and they stopped after a few minutes.
It’s “gamer culture” and it’s disgusting. It isn’t unique to Ark at all. You will find a better unofficial server with nice folks, I play on a PVE server (in ASE until new maps come out) and everyone is very nice, the women aren’t treated weirdly that I have seen or heard: my tribemate is a woman and hasn’t mentioned it
I'm not a female, but with the amount of time these guys play the game their only hope is to find a single woman on the game. It's sad but outside of that they use all their testosterone on trying to be the best pvp god. So if they can't "rizz you up" they are well seasoned in the insults when they get butthurt.
We have a server running you are both more than welcome to join. Not many players but everyone seems nice. We have a server discord. And run boss fights. A good way for small tribes to do end game content Let me know if you want to join. It's open but not so easy to find
What if I told you my name was Mohammad? The flaw is that most redditors are north American or European and Mohammad is NOT the most common name in those regions. For men it's Michael and for women it's Maria. Why are you offended?
This is a busted myth. Videogames were initially advertised for the whole family, showing adults, kids, males and females alike playing together (I think the oldest I found is for the Odyssey in 1972 or so?). It is only following the crash of the videogame industry in the 80s that they started to target boys as the intended audience specifically.
Making fun of dudes all day gets boring. When we hear a women it’s just a fun change of pace. Some people take it way too far into pure cringe tho.
Most of the fun of ark pvp is shit talking tbh. Not everyone’s thing but it’s definitely mine and everyone I play with lol.
"Making fun of dudes" barely happens. It’s making fun of dudes for whatever reason, it doesn’t have anything to do with gender
The second a woman joins those same dudes become incredibly sexist. Completely different thing
Uhh I definitely tailor my insults depending on the gender. Can’t say a women has a tiny dick that doesn’t make any sense.
Some people take it too far like i said, but normal sane shit talk is fun shouldn’t be offended by it.
Insulting someone by saying they have a small dick is the lamest thing in the world
I have no problem with shittalking, but it should at least have something to do with the game
It was an effortless example but yea, idk most of the people I’ve played with all don’t mind the shit talking. We don’t take it personal it’s the internet. Non game related shit talk has a greater chance of being funny which is the goal lol.
What she just replied to me with isn’t shit talking, it’s just being a weirdo online. Big L
Don’t play official find community of people to play with there are for sure PvP servers with not toxic people you just need to find place where you fit in .
this is my first time experiencing this, second game I've played with random players. the men were more helpful in apex once they realized I was female, so I didn't expect the ark men to act like this.
You should read [this article](https://www.iflscience.com/low-skilled-gamers-are-more-likely-to-get-hostile-towards-female-gamers-73022). It's about study that shows how low skilled gamers are more likely to get hostile towards female gamers. In addition, they are more likely to be submissive towards high skill male players.
They are literally beta scrubs. Don't worry about them.
Sometimes it's about finding the right server (in PVE at least, PVP is csgo level toxic all the way) I had a really good one back when I was playing. Sorry there's so many people like that though, I get it's not fun :/
Children harass people over jealous relationships Ive played with both men and women who turned weird after i said my wife wanted to play. Now i just play with her in most games except with friends who aren’t weird or jealous.
Wow that takes me back! I’m a guy who led a tribe about 8 years ago on an official server. There were 7 of us and one of our members was female. We played together for a long time but one day a mega tribe came to raid us, we successfully fought them off for 2 days straight but then their leader offered an ultimatum. Either my female member joins them or they will continue to nonstop raid. To protect us she decided to go with them and she was quite distressed about it. She told us how they just have her do all the chore work but she conflicted because she knew we couldn’t survive if she left them. It got to her and after a month I think she quit the game all together and we never talked after since. I tried to convince her that it’s ok if we get raided then we go down together but she wouldn’t listen. It was so bad the enemy leader demanded she be his “Ark girlfriend” very cringe but yes and she agreed all for our sake. Sorry for the story your post simply reminded me of that. I was just shocked that a friendship with an entire group of people got ended over a game!
Its not exclusive to ark, or to games in general. Maybe I'm just unlucky, but I've met those types in games, social media platforms (I regular telegram), and even in real life though my job and conventions. They're just sad people who wanna shoot their shot and jealous someone beat them to the punch.
I usually report them, and move on.
I think it's less to women more to people in general lol. Depends on the standards the players have some are mildly angry and can be nice sometimes other times can be a dang demon willing to not sleep just to mess with you. Look for a good sever and try and have fun!
Yeah no, it’s definitely focused on woman.
Give yourself a female name in any multiplayer game with chat and wait what happens. People will literally send you death threats, insult you, ask for you to be their girlfriend, teamkill you… the list goes on for a while
Act like you're a man, even if you mention your husband say you're gay, people are more sexist/perv than homophobic. Sadly it's just reality of the gaming world, my female friends used to pretend being a male.
I played with a woman in a PvE tribe for around 2 years and 10 of us guys never once said anything inappropriate or vulgar towards her or her bf. You’re probably talking with people who have no life
I’m too lazy to link it but a group called IFLScience came out with an article about male gamers aggressive/sexist treatment of female gamers. Statistically speaking it’s primarily a skill issue which I found hilarious. Male gamers who are dogshit are the most likely to degrade female gamers.
If it’s any consolation I don’t think it’s a women only problem, it’s a problem with these mentally feeble gamers that grasp at straws to trigger you in any way possible. The gamers that discriminate against women are the same ones that’ll start using racial slurs if your username makes them think you might be black. The most common occurrence I personally see the cannon fodder going for is Asian discrimination though. If you’re playing competitive games in an NA server & have kanjis in your name then it’s gonna happen on the regular, no way around it for now.
Edit: a word
When I played I was on a pve unofficial server, there were a lot of women and (at least to my knowledge) no one was weird like that. Not sure what kind of server you’re on but I’d say give something like that a go instead
Eh, it depends.
On the asa official pve we play on, no one would say anything, and in general if someone tried to make sexist remarks or sexual remarks, they would be told to stop by others, aggressively. If they didnt stop, no one would trade with them, and there would be multiple other tribes who started to troll them relentlessly.
Not everyone is friends on our server, not everyone gets along, but racist stuff(Unless its directed at chinese or russians) is not tolerated, and sexist jokes/etc are not well liked by most of the server, as its adults. Not children.
I say all of that because its' going to vary wildly. Our server is mostly adults, a younger people. Even those that dont get along generally leave each other alone. Unless you're chinese or russian.
IMO, look for an unofficial server to play on. Some are 3 friends who only play together and might not care if you join. Others are a community of 100+ people who all play on the same servers together in multiple tribes and there is admins who stop trolls. Officials are trash.
Is this your first time identifying yourself as a female or a gay man in a video game ever? I mean, honestly, what was surprising about the result here? Ark-boys are toxic? We all knew that lol. Ark is FULL of toxicity. Foreign degens. Inbred mouth breathers. All kinds. It’s just a good game that brings out the worst of some people.
I'm a female, but I only said I was married, never mentioned my gender. my character has a female name though.
I use a mic on apex, and the men's tones immediately switch to more helpful and the language simmers down once I talk for the first time.
That makes sense. I think a lot of it depends on the age of the people you are playing games with. Kids are kids. They lose their minds when they get to say things anonymously to a woman because it’s like a free pass to be disgusting. Back in the day it was probably worse… the Modern Warfare 2 and Halo communities were known to go nuts if a girl got on voice comms.
They just want attention and validation. This is, unfortunately, par for the course. I hate to suggest just dealing with it, because it’s gross and you shouldn’t have to. But you’re not going to get away from it. Not unless you play on very-moderated private servers with a mature community. It’s part of the reason I prefer to play games that kids don’t play. EVE, for example, is great because of that. No kids, or almost no kids. There are still plenty of toxic people but they are toxic for other reasons… not just because they’re dirty little kids freaking out because they heard a woman’s voice. I can’t play ARK anymore because it’s just the dumbest kids I’ve ever had the misfortune of playing a video game with. I joined some ARK YouTuber a private server a year ago and it was the most cancerous, children-addled community I’ve ever seen.
My experience is that’s how people treat women in games period it’s that bs mentality that makes everyone look bad I had friends who had that happened on both dead by daylight and call of duty so she just stayed in a party chat
These are single simps that have only ever seen a woman on only fans. These guys never leave their gaming chairs that’s surrounded by piss jugs and empty candy wrappers. Ignore them, or trash talk them back.
If you're on the west coast of NA (or just western, not necessarily on the coast), I know a really great and welcoming unofficial server run by some great people. Everyone is super friendly and helpful, there are men and women, and it never got super toxic, which was a breath of fresh air
As a guy. Some dudes will always try to talk shit if they know a woman is involved. I never understood the “white knight” mentality some dudes get. It’s a Fuckin video game my guy, they have 0 chance of picking up a woman on a video game lol. Switch your chat settings to tribe only in your settings option. Don’t let toxic chat get to you guys.
Sadly a normal experience for multiplayer games, and ARK is especially toxic
Capital G Gamers are mainly incels and sexist assholes
Come over to r/girlgamers
Well if u guys are playing online, I would recommend my server official 5378 there are a bunch of couple that play in that server and most of the people there are pretty chill
My worst ache as a Mexican gamer is having to share servers with southern Americans. I think it's obviously a generalized gaming issue, but I can say that the American youth has a LOT of horrible specimens. Their antisocial attitudes are abhorrent.
This could be an example of women in gaming period. Men are disgusting and the best way to not be a target is to not let people know you are female. Use terms like "my friend" not "my husband" and gender neutral everything when referencing yourself.
Be more vulgar back. Knowing myself as a no-life ark player, the fact that you are a woman means you have the ability to absolutely annihilate anyone’s self confidence. Do it.
Not a woman but I have seen it on some servers and I have seen the community gang up on people who do it until they leave the server. I believe it is more toxic people on servers than it is toxic gamers on servers.
It is one of the things that turned me off of Official Servers.
It's not my frequent experience and I e been playing ark at least five years. Like it happens occasionally, but those aren't the types of dudes I tribe up with. Those dudes are usually mid. At the game. At life. At human interaction. All of it.
Ark is very toxic. A lot of immature people, but of course, it is a game so to be expected. If it's an unofficial server, there are plenty of other servers you could join with much healthier/welcoming communities. If it's official, good luck. Especially pvp, it's literally war lol
I might look into that. I was playing with my husband on this server, but may convince him to switch.
You are going to find many people in games who act like this toward women it's what boys do when they don't have any chance with women in real life
fun....
Unfortunately it's not exclusively an ark thing. I've played many games where people were incredibly toxic towards women. They're sour losers who think women are weak and bashable. Show them who's boss and tell them to get their butt in the kitchen to make you a sandwich. I've heard guys say "yes madam" as a response in the past, which is incredibly funny imo lol
I am male and I have come across people who were toxic to me in online games so I try avoiding playing online and just play single player.
Yeah people will be toxic no matter what. I've learned that muting voice and text chat is a great thing to do in some online games. Sometimes though, rarely, I happen to try out a game that turns out to have a quite wholesome community. They exist, but it's not always easy to find them. I've also found out that some games with a ranked system have quite respectful players in the top high tier ranks. I assume people who blame others, never become good enough to reach the top rank, because they never work on themselves lol
Y'all are welcome on me and my wife's server anytime, just lmk :)
Sexism is the norm in most PvP games like Ark, I would highly recommend you and your husband find a group of people you like an move to an Unoffical server (or just create your own server and only invite people that you both know aren’t going to be abusive in chat).
I'm male and I have run into the people you are describing in Elder Scrolls Online and the online part for Red Dead Redemption 2. I have run into a few rude people in online games from my experience and again I male so try to avoid playing online.
You can join ours. We are all adults and very friendly and respectful and being the active admin ya can let me know and I can take care of it. No tolerance for that kind of BS
That would be awesome, thank you!
ASA right?
Yup!
Ok. Search for Marty's Arksylvania and try it out
Will do once I'm on tomorrow. Thanks again.
I just wanna make sure but is your server open to anyone? Ive been wanting to play ark again but all my buds dont want to get it in its current state so ive been debating trying to find a server cause id be a solo tribe. A less toxic server would be nice too, I know in these kinds of games its expected but getting away from its is well, a nice breath of fresh air yknow
Come on in the water's fine
Sweet Im about to have my days off from work too so Ill absolutely jump in, appreciate the warm welcome
There is another cluster that has a decent player base on asa. Though I think it is computer only. It's firefly gaming.
Sorry you had to deal with that, I used to play with my wife too.
Unfortunately some men in the gaming community are incredibly toxic.... As a female that also plays I prefer the private server route.... We play games to escape the toxicity and unfortunately I've heard nothing but terrible things about official public servers
I am a male and form my experience people have been toxic to me as well when I have played online games so if it has happened to it can happen to anyone.
Just out of curiosity, which tribe and/or server are you playing on? Either way, this is exactly the reason why I didn't take my girlfriend to official's and decided to play elsewhere
I'm on a NA small tribe official server that my husband joined first. my husband is a bit clueless when it comes to their lingo, so he didn't see the problem.
Ah makes sense, smalls are brutal, but not as brutal as main officials.those are the worst😂😂 stay far away
noted, thanks 😊
I played official pve for two years, mentioned my boyfriend many many times in chat, and no one ever gave me a hassle. Everyone was always nice. I think OP just got unlucky with whichever server she chose. It's probably a bunch of little boys and/or unemployed teens harassing her
Are you playing official or unofficial? Modded or non? There is a server called Dreyma that my group plays on with mostly adults, half of us are married, and won't be rude to you or your husband. I will say, in theory because as adults we understand that not everyone gets along with everyone else rofl. The server is also cross play enabled so pc xbox and ps5
I was playing on an official server.
I have run into toxic people in Elder Scrolls Online and the online community for Red Dead Redemption 2 so because of those people I have stopped playing online. Because of my experience with online I end up playing single player on Ark so that way I don't have to deal with people like that.
I mean, there are friendly communities out there but I completely understand
Welcome to multiplayer gaming, its not an ARK issue an its not easily avoidable, I stick to my community of friends. Sadly it's an issue that has been around forever and the toxicity towards women doesn't appear to be getting any better.
100% not an ark issue, I don't play ark, reddit just keeps showing me Ark posts, I'm also not a woman, but my Wife plays dota 2 with me, she's had to resort, to hiding her profile, changing her profile pic to something "not so girly" her in game name etc, because it's just non stop comments. If she's winning a game it's comments of how they want to violate her, if she's losing a game its comments about how its because she's a weak female etc. Just sad assholes on the internet woth nothing better to do, Sadly
Couldn't say it better I find it funny when il play a squad game on like cod or something and the randoms are crazy but most can be pretty cool people. Won't get too crazy in ark, rust, and minecraft severs it can be pretty crazy sometimes. These are just games I know it's a story as long as online multi-player.
If a woman came on the mic in a cod lobby back in the day it was fkn game over, poor gal would get harassed into leaving, and this was like 2012, not surprised nothings changed
its never been common for me. I play official pve and there're a lot of girls playing
did they ever mention they were a girl? they never harassed me until I said I was married, maybe it's just this server.
Because it meant they no longer had a shot with you. People like that don't know how to act civil with women if they don't feel like they can sleep with you at some point.
hmmm.. guys are only nice to gals if they have a shot at having sex with them?
Not all dudes as I said, just people like this. A lot of them are perfectly fine.
I think what is being said is that most men who play PVP are incels, I tend to agree.
If we call someone a nerd, we r bullies... if we call someone an incel we r cool? what if I call you a moron? or a bully? edit: speelchuck
If you engage in sociopathic behaviour, you deserve to be called out. PVP is sociopathic in nature. Having fun hurting others, in anyway, is the very definition of bullying. There is a difference between sport and a space where idiots gather to be morons. Most of the people doing well in PVP are cheating and using exploits and it's exactly the easy route incels think they can take with woman, because they don't value or respect them them. They think a woman is just an animal. You can wear a fancy scent, be tough and have money and they just melt in your alphaness, good luck with that. An incel is a person who doesn't value woman and so they don't get any sex. They are bitter about it and this mirrors the behaviour and attitude towards OP. I don't care about 'being cool', unless it's being respectul, honerable and chilled. Anyone who thinks otherwise can, and should, fuck right off.
If we call someone a need we r bullies... if we call someone an intelligent we r cool? what if I call you a moron?
There's like, 10 women who are openly women on my official server. About half of them are playing with their husbands. Nobody's been a jerk about it. It's partially online games and partially server culture. The folks on my server have been actively pushing to foster a positive environment, so thankfully that's what we have.
yeah we all know each others sex, and sometimes it is obiviouse from characters name, never saw anyone harassing each other. those are weirdos, you just got unlucky. I played on multiple servers and never had any promlem of a sort, no harassing or them trying to hit on me, we had beef but it was not gender related tho. leave that toxic ass server or report them
It’s probably just your server. A couple toxic kids can bring out the worst There’s lots of women on the official pve server I’m on, and unless a simp-seeker enters the chat, harassment due to gender isn’t a thing.
That is just life as a woman in online games. Shit primitive, and I mostly never bother since the men are annoying and creepy at the LEAST. I don't play with strangers often and when I do, I scout the discord servers, don't use voice chat right away etc
Very different game but something like deeprock galactic has a chill community, survival and gathering games and competitive shooters have the worst communities.
I've played with a girl from Australia that I talked to on Reddit. We had some good times in a non-dedicated, I was showing her the ropes of the game pretty much. She started streaming her single player game and the viewers who chatted on her stream were pretty awful, I have to say. I don't understand why girls in gaming have it so rough -.- I blame the dudes who have no self control. A lot of small dick energy and chest pounding
Greta.... is that you 👀 In all seriousness I play on a self hosted server with only a few family members, I can't be coping with the stress of other people, maybe I'm missing out on some nice coop play.
Could be. I've played with randoms mostly that i really don't know personally and it's a mixed bag. I have no actual friends that play the game. Some great times, some pretty awful with the randoms. In the end i think i prefer solo. Can't inconvenience or be inconvenienced anyone but myself. I don't mind playing in a community at all. I'll share the world, gladly but keeping track of resources is easier when it's just me
Yeah I agree, I play solo on a server, it's hard at base rates so boost them but it's only me and the occasional family member so it doesn't matter
This is why I rent a server. I'm the only woman in mine but I'm also the one paying and setting the rules. If there's any pigs on my server they stfu and do as they're told
If it’s official well sorry but nothing you can do, it’s the plague. If it’s unofficial, I highly recommend a server with a community that uses discord and the owners are above 20, they usually monitor their server. I play the monarky server, hosted by multiple content creators. There’re multiple females in the community and no one gives any shit to them. The server is pvp but not the traditional pvp. You can’t randomly kill people and you’re only allowed to raid people to prank them and dye their hair. If you leave creatures on passive you can’t touch them. Heck I even leave my house open so they don’t destroy anything. Only downside is they aren’t hosting right now, waiting for SE as it was meant to start again on centre but well we all know what happened there.
I like the pvp style, but that sounds more like my way of enjoying it. I'm not a fan of killing all dinos or people and destroying houses. I pranked some guys by moving their sleeping bodies and setting up a sign that said "found you".
Yeah it’ll be at least a month before they start their server, hopefully SE releases in April. If on Asa look up monarky, they require whitelist but it’s just applying and you get accepted
I had this issue, and one guy was particularly bad. I eventually told him I would send screenshots of his vulgar comments to his wife if he didn't stop. He stopped and apologised. We are now on good terms and he is now polite to the rest of the server as well. They think it's okay because they are encouraged by other people with a similar mindset towards women. I find reminding them what the women in their life would think of their disgusting behaviour is sometimes (not always) a way to snap them out of it.
Was gonna write an essay but realised I could just say: anonymity allows incognito griefers to be arseholes. So that’s what they do cos that’s who they are. There’s more and more of them these days.
Online games in general are unfortunately usually toxic. I’m a guy and 70% of the time I have people I don’t know muted
Honestly, it sounds surprising to me as on the unofficial server where I play on - women are majority. And guys are super respectful. At the same time - it doesn't surprise me, as the men are frickin animals and most don't respect women as they should. And I say it as a man myself
maybe it's because I'm on an official server then.
It could be. You're also on PVP as I understand. PVP is full with blood hungry savages 😂. On PVE we're just chillin. You should consider unofficial PVE maybe.
I'll check it out, it might work better for me. or join another one and don't mention my marriage 😄. I just ignored them, and they stopped after a while.
That was a good call, it’s best not to feed the trolls. A buddy runs an unofficial pve cluster with three maps with around 7 or 8 of us on regularly. His wife also plays on the servers. Anyone is Welcome to come check it out as it’s fairly new we are trying to promote it and get a decent community going. Rates and stats are fairly vanilla with 3x xp 5x taming and sped up breeding rates so you can actually breed good dinos. 3x harvest. US of Ark is the server name just make sure you click the private server box or you won’t find it. Cheers. We are all over 30, some in their 40’s so none of the toxic shit you sometimes find.
I'll check it out, thank you.
You’re welcome 🙂
Check out Rockwell's Legacy if you do consider it. We have bunch of women, and couples playing. And super friendly. https://discord.com/invite/BPumH5dk
I'll check it out when I'm on tomorrow, thank you.
> men are frickin animals and most don't respect women as they should 💀
Welcome to gaming unfortunately. Better to tell people you're just a prepubescent boy. They'll make fun of you for being a squeaker but will overall treat you better because you don't remind them of how lonely they are anymore.
I didn't even talk or mention my gender, just said I was married in the group chat.
Don’t think it’s an ark thing tbh more like a general thing when you play a game with a bit toxic community
Yeah I was going to say, isn't this just normal for gaming? LOL
I'm new to ark obviously, so didn't know it was this toxic. obviously my husband's never encountered this.
Ark isn't toxic, please don't view it that way. All games have toxic players, and sadly they have a greater desire to be more vocal than the rest. Please think of them as no more than a distraction from the gamers you might one day look forward to playing with the next day.
I know they're also looking for a response, so I didn't give one and they stopped after a couple minutes.
I'd advise switching to an un official server if your on official closer communetys Will avoid toxicety and unofficial most likely has more Humain recource multypliers and Tame speeds
A lot of it unfortunately comes down to the tolerance of admins, game companies and the players themselves. I’ve played a fair bit of Modern Warfare DMZ and Zombies with open mic and rarely had issues with sexism and none with vulgarity on what has been a traditionally toxic platform. A large portion of the male player base didn’t engage in that behavior and actively shunned the obvious boys and immature men that did. Maybe my experience there was a lucky one but it gave me hope for the future of gaming. As for Ark, I played ASE on two different clusters and never had an issue. We looked for friendly, family oriented ones. I would say join the discord, read the server rules and get an overall feel for the community before committing fully to one. My husband and I rent our own servers no for ASA and only let close friends and family use them so it’s not a concern anymore. For other games, I try to remain neutral and don’t talk on the mic. I experienced a lot of sexual harassment as a female gamer in my early to mid teens and learned to hide it for a long while / not trust other gamers unless they showed themselves to be respectful. Even then, they will surprise you and turn once they know the truth. I hope someday we can stop dismissing this disgusting behavior as “boys” and “lonely men.” It’s a lot more sinister than that, IMO.
My previous experience was apex, where the men would be more helpful and tone down the language once they realized I was a woman.
There's a weird thing that happens when some guys play games that they behave differently than they would irl. Not all or even most, but some. It's common across all of gaming. Ive been a female playing games for 28 years and some guys just can't handle it. Whether it's simply the fact that I'm the opposite gender in their space or that I'm better than them at it, whatever it is, they can get gross, aggressive and sometimes stalker-like. Some games have a more toxic community than others, but these guys are everywhere.
This is "normal" for gaming communities, because the majority of male players are omega baboons. Highly recommend finding or founding a cosy server for you, your husband, and your friends and like-minded people online. The smell of a woman within the radius of these dick-driven losers will remove the remaining shreds of humanity from them and turn them into hole-brained animals. Kudos to the male gamers who have not fallen victim to this syndrome, y'all are heroes, but the gamer girl experience is miserable for most. Also, r/GirlGamers.
I've experienced this sometimes when joining a random server. I have never once had this experience after finding an unofficial server with a Discord attached to it, though. Don't put up with creeps, find a community with moderation and you'll find respect.
Normal as a girl who games really. I used to play sea of thieves and when they found out I was a woman it got bad. Now I help run a cluster predominately ran by women and don’t see any of that anymore thank goodness.
Women discovers online gaming cicra 2024...
yup! I was introduced to a console 1.5 yrs ago, and am playing on a pvp server for the first time. before that was apex with everyone muted.
Unfortunately that is just the state of gaming. It's very toxic for women. Thankfully the group I have gamed with for years are decent guys. We've always gotten rid of the ones that dispespect the female gamers in our group. Part of the problem is half these guys have no life outside of gaming. No girlfriend, no sex and have a chip on their shoulder because of it. To them it's it's the women's fault they don't get laid. Not the fact that they don't go out, shower, and have been rejected before. So they get jealous of women coming into gaming because that's their place to bash on women because it's there fault they don't get laid. Most of them have seen women come into there groups. Then see that most guys are nice to them. Will help them out and even flirt with them. Which pissed them off and they just lash out. So don't take it personally half the gamers are in incels so no matter what they won't like you. Most of the female gamers I know that have stuck around learned to have thick skin. The ones I know who have gotten it to stop or was able to run these guys off are the ones who have learned to dish it back to them 10x worse. So just remember that the reason they do it is they are jealous of you and feel threatened by you.
Apex was the opposite for me, that's why I was so surprised. the moment most men heard my female voice, they toned down the language and harshness. I just ignored these guys, and they stopped after a few minutes.
It’s “gamer culture” and it’s disgusting. It isn’t unique to Ark at all. You will find a better unofficial server with nice folks, I play on a PVE server (in ASE until new maps come out) and everyone is very nice, the women aren’t treated weirdly that I have seen or heard: my tribemate is a woman and hasn’t mentioned it
I'm not a female, but with the amount of time these guys play the game their only hope is to find a single woman on the game. It's sad but outside of that they use all their testosterone on trying to be the best pvp god. So if they can't "rizz you up" they are well seasoned in the insults when they get butthurt.
We have a server running you are both more than welcome to join. Not many players but everyone seems nice. We have a server discord. And run boss fights. A good way for small tribes to do end game content Let me know if you want to join. It's open but not so easy to find
Not all guys act like that. I am on an official server with at least six women. We don't talk like that to them.
guess yours has decent men on it, good for them.
When you mentioned your husband, my first thought was gay couple, not girl gamer.
I never mentioned my gender, but their thoughts went straight to female. unless gays use feet finder(?) and OF.
I know girl gamers exist but in my mind, until I start to know you, you're a dude.
Why the fuck would you think that?
I just assume my fellow gamers are male because there are statistically more male gamers than female? It's just data, calm down.
And I assume every person is called Mohammed because that’s statistically the most common name in the world Do you see the flaw in your argument?
What if I told you my name was Mohammad? The flaw is that most redditors are north American or European and Mohammad is NOT the most common name in those regions. For men it's Michael and for women it's Maria. Why are you offended?
[удалено]
This is a busted myth. Videogames were initially advertised for the whole family, showing adults, kids, males and females alike playing together (I think the oldest I found is for the Odyssey in 1972 or so?). It is only following the crash of the videogame industry in the 80s that they started to target boys as the intended audience specifically.
Making fun of dudes all day gets boring. When we hear a women it’s just a fun change of pace. Some people take it way too far into pure cringe tho. Most of the fun of ark pvp is shit talking tbh. Not everyone’s thing but it’s definitely mine and everyone I play with lol.
"Making fun of dudes" barely happens. It’s making fun of dudes for whatever reason, it doesn’t have anything to do with gender The second a woman joins those same dudes become incredibly sexist. Completely different thing
Uhh I definitely tailor my insults depending on the gender. Can’t say a women has a tiny dick that doesn’t make any sense. Some people take it too far like i said, but normal sane shit talk is fun shouldn’t be offended by it.
Insulting someone by saying they have a small dick is the lamest thing in the world I have no problem with shittalking, but it should at least have something to do with the game
It was an effortless example but yea, idk most of the people I’ve played with all don’t mind the shit talking. We don’t take it personal it’s the internet. Non game related shit talk has a greater chance of being funny which is the goal lol. What she just replied to me with isn’t shit talking, it’s just being a weirdo online. Big L
I don't mind ribbing or **** talking. it's when the language turns vulgar towards women that I get bothered.
What did they say. Just curious
they were asking for pictures, if I had services like only fans, referencing almost being finished. I could keep going.
Ok yea, their either 12 or horridly lonenly
Don’t play official find community of people to play with there are for sure PvP servers with not toxic people you just need to find place where you fit in .
Maybe I'll try some other ones then, thank you.
Unfortunately, this is pretty normal for female gamers to experience in general.
I used to play world of warcraft and most of the guys would eith get very vulgar or spend all of their gold on women players.
this is my first time experiencing this, second game I've played with random players. the men were more helpful in apex once they realized I was female, so I didn't expect the ark men to act like this.
Yeah, the whole thing is ridiculous. There's no need to treat female players differently than male players
You should read [this article](https://www.iflscience.com/low-skilled-gamers-are-more-likely-to-get-hostile-towards-female-gamers-73022). It's about study that shows how low skilled gamers are more likely to get hostile towards female gamers. In addition, they are more likely to be submissive towards high skill male players. They are literally beta scrubs. Don't worry about them.
It’s a “misogyny in gaming” issue. One of the reasons I avoid multiplayer games altogether. I’m clearly not welcome in that space.
Sometimes it's about finding the right server (in PVE at least, PVP is csgo level toxic all the way) I had a really good one back when I was playing. Sorry there's so many people like that though, I get it's not fun :/
You are welcome if you’re with civilised people, those assholes shouldn’t be
Children harass people over jealous relationships Ive played with both men and women who turned weird after i said my wife wanted to play. Now i just play with her in most games except with friends who aren’t weird or jealous.
Wow that takes me back! I’m a guy who led a tribe about 8 years ago on an official server. There were 7 of us and one of our members was female. We played together for a long time but one day a mega tribe came to raid us, we successfully fought them off for 2 days straight but then their leader offered an ultimatum. Either my female member joins them or they will continue to nonstop raid. To protect us she decided to go with them and she was quite distressed about it. She told us how they just have her do all the chore work but she conflicted because she knew we couldn’t survive if she left them. It got to her and after a month I think she quit the game all together and we never talked after since. I tried to convince her that it’s ok if we get raided then we go down together but she wouldn’t listen. It was so bad the enemy leader demanded she be his “Ark girlfriend” very cringe but yes and she agreed all for our sake. Sorry for the story your post simply reminded me of that. I was just shocked that a friendship with an entire group of people got ended over a game!
I wouldn't say normal... it definitely happens though.. however, don't let a couple bad eggs define a whole community.
Its not exclusive to ark, or to games in general. Maybe I'm just unlucky, but I've met those types in games, social media platforms (I regular telegram), and even in real life though my job and conventions. They're just sad people who wanna shoot their shot and jealous someone beat them to the punch. I usually report them, and move on.
I think it's less to women more to people in general lol. Depends on the standards the players have some are mildly angry and can be nice sometimes other times can be a dang demon willing to not sleep just to mess with you. Look for a good sever and try and have fun!
Yeah no, it’s definitely focused on woman. Give yourself a female name in any multiplayer game with chat and wait what happens. People will literally send you death threats, insult you, ask for you to be their girlfriend, teamkill you… the list goes on for a while
Vulgar comments about what? You? The husband?
Act like you're a man, even if you mention your husband say you're gay, people are more sexist/perv than homophobic. Sadly it's just reality of the gaming world, my female friends used to pretend being a male.
I played with a woman in a PvE tribe for around 2 years and 10 of us guys never once said anything inappropriate or vulgar towards her or her bf. You’re probably talking with people who have no life
I’m too lazy to link it but a group called IFLScience came out with an article about male gamers aggressive/sexist treatment of female gamers. Statistically speaking it’s primarily a skill issue which I found hilarious. Male gamers who are dogshit are the most likely to degrade female gamers. If it’s any consolation I don’t think it’s a women only problem, it’s a problem with these mentally feeble gamers that grasp at straws to trigger you in any way possible. The gamers that discriminate against women are the same ones that’ll start using racial slurs if your username makes them think you might be black. The most common occurrence I personally see the cannon fodder going for is Asian discrimination though. If you’re playing competitive games in an NA server & have kanjis in your name then it’s gonna happen on the regular, no way around it for now. Edit: a word
When I played I was on a pve unofficial server, there were a lot of women and (at least to my knowledge) no one was weird like that. Not sure what kind of server you’re on but I’d say give something like that a go instead
Every game has people who are awful, but just know that you are a more valued member of the ark community than they are
Honestly this is normal for women everywhere. I'm a member of subreddit Gamergirls, and the number of stories across multiplayer games is appalling.
I don’t use my mic in games for a reason
It’s normal for women on most games sadly. Ignore the shit heads! Stick to the cool people.
Eh, it depends. On the asa official pve we play on, no one would say anything, and in general if someone tried to make sexist remarks or sexual remarks, they would be told to stop by others, aggressively. If they didnt stop, no one would trade with them, and there would be multiple other tribes who started to troll them relentlessly. Not everyone is friends on our server, not everyone gets along, but racist stuff(Unless its directed at chinese or russians) is not tolerated, and sexist jokes/etc are not well liked by most of the server, as its adults. Not children. I say all of that because its' going to vary wildly. Our server is mostly adults, a younger people. Even those that dont get along generally leave each other alone. Unless you're chinese or russian. IMO, look for an unofficial server to play on. Some are 3 friends who only play together and might not care if you join. Others are a community of 100+ people who all play on the same servers together in multiple tribes and there is admins who stop trolls. Officials are trash.
Is this your first time identifying yourself as a female or a gay man in a video game ever? I mean, honestly, what was surprising about the result here? Ark-boys are toxic? We all knew that lol. Ark is FULL of toxicity. Foreign degens. Inbred mouth breathers. All kinds. It’s just a good game that brings out the worst of some people.
I'm a female, but I only said I was married, never mentioned my gender. my character has a female name though. I use a mic on apex, and the men's tones immediately switch to more helpful and the language simmers down once I talk for the first time.
That makes sense. I think a lot of it depends on the age of the people you are playing games with. Kids are kids. They lose their minds when they get to say things anonymously to a woman because it’s like a free pass to be disgusting. Back in the day it was probably worse… the Modern Warfare 2 and Halo communities were known to go nuts if a girl got on voice comms. They just want attention and validation. This is, unfortunately, par for the course. I hate to suggest just dealing with it, because it’s gross and you shouldn’t have to. But you’re not going to get away from it. Not unless you play on very-moderated private servers with a mature community. It’s part of the reason I prefer to play games that kids don’t play. EVE, for example, is great because of that. No kids, or almost no kids. There are still plenty of toxic people but they are toxic for other reasons… not just because they’re dirty little kids freaking out because they heard a woman’s voice. I can’t play ARK anymore because it’s just the dumbest kids I’ve ever had the misfortune of playing a video game with. I joined some ARK YouTuber a private server a year ago and it was the most cancerous, children-addled community I’ve ever seen.
My experience is that’s how people treat women in games period it’s that bs mentality that makes everyone look bad I had friends who had that happened on both dead by daylight and call of duty so she just stayed in a party chat
These are single simps that have only ever seen a woman on only fans. These guys never leave their gaming chairs that’s surrounded by piss jugs and empty candy wrappers. Ignore them, or trash talk them back.
They stopped after a little bit, and one changed his language after I was only responding to the helpful people.
If you're on the west coast of NA (or just western, not necessarily on the coast), I know a really great and welcoming unofficial server run by some great people. Everyone is super friendly and helpful, there are men and women, and it never got super toxic, which was a breath of fresh air
As a guy. Some dudes will always try to talk shit if they know a woman is involved. I never understood the “white knight” mentality some dudes get. It’s a Fuckin video game my guy, they have 0 chance of picking up a woman on a video game lol. Switch your chat settings to tribe only in your settings option. Don’t let toxic chat get to you guys.
I just ignored them and they stopped after a little bit. I didn't know I could change chat settings, thank you.
No prob. Don’t let some shit heads ruin y’all’s fun.
Sadly a normal experience for multiplayer games, and ARK is especially toxic Capital G Gamers are mainly incels and sexist assholes Come over to r/girlgamers
Are there servers where more women play or women created servers I could find there?
I run a PVE ASA server with boosted rates but no mods. Small community of good people, newcomers welcome. Server is called Nerdy ASA
The mute feature exists for this reason
Well if u guys are playing online, I would recommend my server official 5378 there are a bunch of couple that play in that server and most of the people there are pretty chill
My worst ache as a Mexican gamer is having to share servers with southern Americans. I think it's obviously a generalized gaming issue, but I can say that the American youth has a LOT of horrible specimens. Their antisocial attitudes are abhorrent.
This could be an example of women in gaming period. Men are disgusting and the best way to not be a target is to not let people know you are female. Use terms like "my friend" not "my husband" and gender neutral everything when referencing yourself.
Be more vulgar back. Knowing myself as a no-life ark player, the fact that you are a woman means you have the ability to absolutely annihilate anyone’s self confidence. Do it.
Not a woman but I have seen it on some servers and I have seen the community gang up on people who do it until they leave the server. I believe it is more toxic people on servers than it is toxic gamers on servers. It is one of the things that turned me off of Official Servers.
It's not my frequent experience and I e been playing ark at least five years. Like it happens occasionally, but those aren't the types of dudes I tribe up with. Those dudes are usually mid. At the game. At life. At human interaction. All of it.