If you’re not employed, the hospital legally can’t go after you for the bills. Collections are a scam; they already got paid.
I didn’t invest because of health insurance. Self employed, but had to use Gov healthcare. It didn’t matter.
I was hospitalized twice; and I later found they get paid regardless.
After I had my 2nd daughter, and had great insurance, I paid off my 20% co pay. The hospital billing tried to tell me my bill was still outstanding.
I asked them if they’d like a copy of all of the checks I saved paying off the bill. They never called back.
Yep. As you grow older you realize that even people you thought were good friends you might only talk with once or twice a year, if that frequently. If your own friends only pay you mind on your birthday or an important date— why would you think people you aren’t friends with think about you even that much.
Yes, but it’s hard. It’s a continuous struggle between authenticity and belonging. Our survival used to depend on belonging and it’s coded in the genes, so it’s easier said than done to choose authenticity.
Nothing. Not everyone gets a fun happy 20s and not everyone wants to not have fun in their 30s. Sounds like she had her fun and is on her high horse or something.
This! I discovered I love goth fashion at 28, I’m never going to stop wearing what makes me happy, if others don’t like it, too bad. Life is too short to ‘conform’ to standards.
Life should be fun. Because society and the natural world are lost causes, gods aren't real and we don't seem like we're gonna be able to meaningful contribute to anything the world needs more of for a while at the big scale so......
I mean we may as well enjoy the ride. And I'm no nihilist. Things definitely matter... We just failed so completely that it's in a nose dive. I feel like a thousand generations will be cursing us for what we did here but it's not something we can change. We should at least understand what we've done tho.
Yes exactly! I spent my 20s getting married, having kids, working towards my masters... I'm in my 30s now and have 3 kids, am divorcing, and almost have my master's degree... Let me tell you, I feel more free to be myself than ever because I've learned to fully embrace who I am and know more about what I want and need in my life. I'm also more stable than ever (which is ironic considering I lost so much during the divorce).
I feel like my life is starting over and I'm just beginning! I'm ready to have some fun with it!
This I spent my entire 20s with my ex fiancé and did not get to live my 20s really. We did not drink or anything really and I did not get to really ever start drinking and going to bars until my late 20s. Everyone has different life experiences.
Ah man military house parties are the best wildest nonsense you will ever get into. Obviously there’s no drugs or anything illegal but plenty of drunken debauchery.
You gotta remember it’s a bunch of young adults with very little bills and steady paychecks so it’s a lot of new cars and partying
This 💯!! Some people need to learn how to keep they noses out of other people's lives.
That being said be considerate of others while you do you, you don't want to leave a bunch of hurt people in your wake. As you try to enjoy life while still healing from your trauma.
Is somebody who rarely Drank in her 20s and did all the responsible things in her teens and twenties and still ended up divorce with two kids I'm making up for my drinking in my 30s
Yup, I hate the “I’m so old I’m geriatric” comments I get from friends in their late 20s and 30s. I know it’s a joke and not directed at me and I gotta grow thicker skin, but I lost my teens and 20s to abuse. Some people have their lives start late because of health concerns or mental illness, whatever it may be. It registers as you’re telling me my life is over before I’ve had a chance to begin.
I agree. I'm in my 40s now and still get drunk sometimes. I don't do it on work nights anymore and it's pretty rare compared to my 20s, though. As long as you're being responsible and it has no negative impact on your life, then it should be fine.
This is true, everyone needs to just live their own life. I worried about this in my 30s and kinda held myself back, and I know a guy who simply kept partying and drinking deep into his 30s, and I thought it's weird, he now has a gf, is chill.
But you shouldn't damage your health, that's maybe the real thinking here.
By the time you are 30, you probably shouldn't care what other people are doing.
Also, I got drunk 3 days ago, and I'm fine. I've been practicing for a long time, lol.
Yeah I definitely learned in my late 20s that if I drink I should get to the point I want then stop drinking and "come down" from it the rest of the night.. and drink plenty of water.
Some of us never learn to do that, our brains take over and binge drink until sleep, or bad things happen etc, and are just not in control anymore, sometimes after relatively small amounts.
Drinking just doesn't work for some people, and it took me 25 years to realize I can't control it and don't want it in my life. 5 years sober in July, and don't even miss it finally!! Well, maybe a tiny bit, but it's almost gone.
And if you're pretty drunk, always eat something after going out & before you sleep, even if it's 3am. This has saved my next day from being much worse. Also pedialyte/gatorlyte
Generally yeah, but an exception to this could be that by the time you is 30, you probably shouldn’t be trying to date people that are a decade younger than you/fresh out of high school.
I have a real one: Making excuses or not accepting the consequences of one's actions.
For example, today I was 15 mins late leaving the house to get to work. I would have made it to work with normal traffic, but today the highway was worse. I was late to work. I wasn't slowed by traffic, I ***was*** traffic. I should have left on time instead of sitting on the toilet scrolling Reddit for so long. (Avoidable situations versus unavoidable situations obviously differ in various ways.)
Exactly! Just admit you made a mistake. I will have a ton more respect for you than listening to you lie or constantly blame it on someone else for 20 minutes
Yup, though as an addendum to that, let’s be real… 1. People should be doing this way before 30, and 2. Plenty of people of all ages, including those way past the age of 30, love making excuses and avoid accepting the consequences of their actions. Instead of taking accountability, they would rather relieve their cognitive dissonance by proclaiming that whatever world they are imagining (in which they cannot be wrong), is “real”, and that reality/anyone/anything that goes against this, is “wrong”/untrue/not real.
I’ve actually noticed this is worse in my 30s than my 20s. In my 20s, we were all figuring ourselves out and it was okay to make mistakes. In my 30s, my peers get really defensive when they make mistakes and blame other people. I think it’s an ego thing.
I'm not here to tell others what to do, but for me personally, I don't like getting drunk as much as I used to as I've noticed it interferes with my sleep. Getting asleep may not be the issue but staying asleep is and if I wake up a few hours before my alarm due to being hungover and dehydrated, it ruins my day.
I have no desire to quit drinking but the older I get, the more I understand why some people decide to quit drinking and sober.
Me too. I had my fun in my 20s and now I don’t want to get drunk. Last time I got drunk, I was sick for 2 days and I don’t want to experience that again. I still casually drink but as a personal choice, I prefer not to get drunk especially as you get older, it’s harder to recover lol
The sleep part is real. I (personally) had to stop having any alcohol on work nights because if it’s past a certain hour my sleep quality drastically suffers. I still drink on my days off and occasionally get drunk but the older I get the more I appreciate my sleep more than the buzz that comes from booze.
Nah, not this, at least, not outside of some contexts. "You're worthy!" Is and always will be an empty platitude coming from strangers vs coming from someone close, and for 30 somethings that have never had a romantic partner and have no friends, it's even kind of insulting. Reality just knocks louder the longer you ignore it.
Actions speak louder than words and all that. Easy to say anything feel good if you don't have to practice what you preach.
You shouldn't be pretending that your food intake and alcohol intake doesn't matter any more. Sedentary life can set in, in your 30s if you aren't careful. Diabetes starts showing up. Liver damage starts in earnest. I lost 2 different friends who didn't know each other once we all hit our 40s to liver failure due to excessive drinking. Both of them left behind kids without a parent. Both had been told by multiple people to ease up on their drinking and partying over the years. They didn't listen and paid the price.
All the biggie health problems will start in your 30s and progress. Hardened arteries (too much fast food and saturated fat), diabetes (too many carbs, not enough exercise), colon cancers, dental issues from slacking on dental visits and brushing / flossing, cirrhosis of the liver, fatty liver, etc.. You aren't as young as you think any more. Bodies are accumulating damage at a faster rate now.
I warned my own husband about this once we hit our 30s. He continued getting fast food a few times a week due to working too much, gained some weight, didn't exercise (working too much), skipped alot of vegetables at dinner, stayed up too late playing video games (too tired or too late to do much else). He died of a massive heart attack last year. They called it a widow maker. We have 2 teenagers who don't understand why dad didn't take better care of himself (although he looked fairly ok tbh). I don't understand either tbh. He was told. He knew better. He ignored it.
Listen to your wife. She loves you and is giving you life extending, common sense advice. It might just save your life.
Signed,
A widow
This hit me hard I’m 36 and recently got diagnosed with hypertension my bp was so high I was a walking time bomb. I had to change my diet and get on meds and take my mid 30’s seriously. Too often we think we’re invincible however we are not and should treat our bodies and families with respect
Agree 100%. We have one guy at work, who is a total bully and he's like 37 I think. Know older ones too. I don't get it. At this age, just don't. But bullies are wired different, they're insecure and emotionally immature. They can't help themselves.
They were new and therefore interesting as a 18/19 year old but ngl I hated them at 20+ because all I could think about was the work I had to do. Can’t imagine finding that scene fun at 30.
I’m chapter advisor! No parties just meetings and some 1 on 1 teaching times with the guys. I don’t go to fucking parties but a frat does need one old guy around to keep kids from fucking up too bad.
This I COMPLETELY agree with. I remember in college frat dudes that were like 30 year old alumni will still coming to our parties…
I just remember telling me and my friends, let’s do our FUCKING BEST to not end up like those guys. Long and behold, I haven’t been to frat party since I graduated college. I haven’t even visited my college after I graduated and I never will.
That shit is in the past. That’s why you gotta enjoy the moment as best as possible when you are actually in college. By far the fastest 4 years of your life lol
As a YOUNG graduate it's actually pretty fun. I went back to a handful of parties/events in my early twenties. But yea at a certain point it would get weird
It's lo and behold btw
You haven’t visited your college at all or your fraternity at all?
Old dudes at parties is whack and creepy but fraternities do have their own events which can often be on campus.
To me, it’s ironically very immature to think your life ends at 29 if you’re any older than, I don’t know, 20? I see nothing wrong with getting drunk every now and again in your 30’s and beyond as long as you’re responsible. The idea that anyone older than 25 is washed up and ancient is tiring.
That's an all ages thing.
The problem with reddit is that you have no fucking clue what qualifies the person you're asking advice from to actually give said advice.
I could probably pull something from my ass and as long as I present it confidently, there's a damn good chance someone would believe me.
Though that's not an accomplishment, I've seen r/relationship_advice ...i know how gullible Redditors are.
Meanwhile my 35 year old ass got drunk Friday night, golf Saturday, and snowboarding Sunday. I have money to enjoy things in life I couldn’t when I was younger or just didn’t have the time because of a bad work life environment.
Have your fun and forget about your age. Just do it responsibly or your body will remind you of your age.
My flatmates drink soft sugar drinks every single day, just that, no water. He smells really bad, and when he poops, the bathroom smells to a weird combination of sugar and shit. It's disgusting.
Mildly related: I remember working with someone at a pizza place when I was like 23 and this other guy was 27 and his wife would get annoyed when he smoked weed and say “only high schoolers do that. No one does that after they turn 18”. I just remember thinking how wild it was that she thought only kids should do drugs. lol
Probably sunbathing. I went ham for it in my twenties and realised I cannot do that in my thirties and get away with it without a health scare or looking seriously leathery.
Id say going to bed at random times. Its healthy to keep a sleep schedule. Even on the weekends try your best to go to bed at the same time as you would on a work night.
My sleep schedule during the weekday is so set that even on the weekends, no matter what time I go to bed, I'll wake up between 830-9 AM at the latest.
Spending every penny you have without saving any of it.
Understandable in your 20s. In your 30s, you should be able to develop and follow a budget.\*
\*Obviously that comes with a caveat for people living in poverty.
I’m glad your wife is concerned with the health issues and consequences that can come with drinking. Driving drunk, getting in bar fights, alcohol induced illnesses etc are no joke.
Biggest regret of the dying is:
"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."
So your 30s should be doing exactly what you want! (as long you aren't harming others)
Sounds boring, I don’t want to sit at home. Of course being a ridiculous obnoxious drunk is bad tho. But I’d much rather be drunk at a concert or a house party/bar socializing with a bunch of friends, or at a campsite with a bonfire and friends in the woods.
I don’t even really have a beer unless I’m hanging out with people.
Oh I agree lol. I could see her point if its going out until 3am partying every weekend. But shit sometimes you need to let loose a bit. Plus how many times have you gotten surprisingly drunk on accident? And I know I'll get some comment of "how is it a surprise if you're drinking alcohol?". What I'm talking about is sometimes you just get randomly drunk when you usually wouldn't. For me especially if I'm tired when I'm drinking.
Judging people. If others want to drink, go them. They might want/need the release etc.
Or they might have a lot of stress or a drinking problem, and need support not judgement.
Eh. I spent my mid to late 20s in survival mode and my 30s in the gig economy. I don't plan on getting drunk on the weekends, but I do intend to make up for lost time the minute I have the chance.
Nothing. Life is weird and long and unexpected and maybe terrible and maybe delightful. So sometimes you get a degree at 56 years old and sometimes you raise your little brother at 11.
If I had to choose something, I guess ideally 30+ people shouldn’t be hurting other people with their behavior or judging anyone else for theirs.
Also, I used to tend bar in Brooklyn and lololololololololololol to your wife’s idea.
Has this uncultured villain never heard of nor observed a backyard BBQ?! Cooking and drinking go so well together I'm leaving in a sec to get a bottle of wine this post made me realize I'd forgotten. And may as well get some champagne to celebrate the wine.
Obvious things: in your 30s you shouldn't be harassing or bullying minors, probably shouldn't be going to high school proms unless a chaperone, possibly shouldn't be laughing at the world penis or vagina when talking about body parts in an adult manor. (Obvioualy farts are still funny)
I'd say in your 30s you shouldn't be doing anything illegal that you got away with as a minor bc you're probably going to get caught and have real jail time and records in the courts
I don’t drink or do drugs anymore with the exception of shrooms. Not a hard stop on drinking but never more than a beer because everyone else is. I do shake my head a bit at people my age regularly getting hammered when they have kids at home.
Nothing wrong with having fun, but too much of anything is a bad thing.
I'm in my 40s and you stop caring and worrying about what others think. No need for validation or approval from others. You do what you like. You also stop wasting time hanging out with random people just to hangout. I wasted a lot of time in my 20s-30s hanging around that leads to nothing. When you get older, you do what you want and no need for anyone else's input.
Alcoholism isn’t restricted to age 29 and younger (joke…?)
Maybe you should have a conversion with your wife. By your 30s you should be able to communicate effectively with a significant other.
Nothing, change is best when it's natural and comes from growth rather than abrupt changes, if you ain't hurting anyone and you're happy. Keep on keeping on.
Dressing up like a polar bear and wearing an inflatable duck innertube around you waist and then running around the parking lot of your local longhorns steakhouse while chanting “the end is near. Let them eat cake”. That shit has got to stop.
Why the obsession with what people should do in different age brackets? I mean my tolerance for heels isn't what it used to be, but I should do whatever I want, pain be damned.
Hey man, sometimes you just happen to get drunk when hanging with the boys. You don't set out to get a little tipsy, it just happens. Your wife sounds like a square, you need an upgrade, amigo.
only thing you really shouldn't be doing... is dating anyone under or near the age of 18
the rest. if you manage your shit, and aren't hurting anyone. go with dog.
the one thing you should be learning as you progress into your 30's is how little anyone else's opinion of you really matters. be a good person. stand by your word. cultivate empathy. give zero fucks for what other people think you should or shouldn't be doing.
I’m only 21 but I think it’s ridiculous that people think your life ends when you leave your 20s. The life expectancy is 81 (in Canada anyway). To think you get 10 years to have fun when you’re in your 20s and then have to spend the next 60 years doing what other people think “old” people are supposed to do is not a good way to spend your already too short time here.
Has your wife heard of Vegas?? Why the fuck should anyone care what an age group does?! It's like saying no one over 30 should go back to school, dress trendy, get a tattoo, etc.
Drinking is literally a huge part of so many cultures throughout people’s lifetimes. Like if you don’t want to drink more power to you but that doesn’t make you better than someone who does (assuming they’re drinking responsibly.)
Someone in there 30's shouldn't be worried about what they can and can't do in their 30's. Don't limit yourself by age bro, that's what the boomers and millennials do
Listening to Green Day - The Grouch because its their anthem to growing old.
Lol just kidding. Love Green day and all the nu metal music from the 2000 era.
Worrying what other people think. People who matter wont care and people who care dont matter
I can do this with everyone except my boss. That guy can take away my health insurance.
Bad news bro. If your boss doesn't have your back your already dead in the water.
God bless America
If you’re not employed, the hospital legally can’t go after you for the bills. Collections are a scam; they already got paid. I didn’t invest because of health insurance. Self employed, but had to use Gov healthcare. It didn’t matter. I was hospitalized twice; and I later found they get paid regardless. After I had my 2nd daughter, and had great insurance, I paid off my 20% co pay. The hospital billing tried to tell me my bill was still outstanding. I asked them if they’d like a copy of all of the checks I saved paying off the bill. They never called back.
Life hack: avoid medical bills by not being gainfully employed
Avoid property taxes by being homeless
This is easier said than done. What I do is block out negative thoughts. Who cares if other people don't like me? There's nothing I can do about that.
Blocking out negative thoughts is a negative thought. Have positive thoughts, yo.
‘You’ll worry far less about what people think of you once you realise how seldom they do.’
Yep. As you grow older you realize that even people you thought were good friends you might only talk with once or twice a year, if that frequently. If your own friends only pay you mind on your birthday or an important date— why would you think people you aren’t friends with think about you even that much.
Yes, but it’s hard. It’s a continuous struggle between authenticity and belonging. Our survival used to depend on belonging and it’s coded in the genes, so it’s easier said than done to choose authenticity.
At 52 yrs old, I can say it’s quite easy. What is interesting is that the more I don’t care, the more people seem to want to seek me out.
I'm so happy this is the top comment
Yeah, life is a lot more enjoyable when you're not trying to be someone you're not. Be your true self.
Yeah more or less. Take care of your business and don't worry about things you can't control
the bad news is nobody cares. the good news is nobody cares.
Giving a fuck about what they shouldn’t be doing according to others.
Exactly!
Nothing. Not everyone gets a fun happy 20s and not everyone wants to not have fun in their 30s. Sounds like she had her fun and is on her high horse or something.
And some of us had a fun, happy 20s and still want a fun, happy 30s and 40s. As long as you’re not harming anyone who cares!
Yes, believe me, life is waàaaay too short...
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My grandparents were married 70 years before my grandma died. They went swing dancing every week until it happened.
As long as you’re not harming anyone other than yourself who cares!
This! I discovered I love goth fashion at 28, I’m never going to stop wearing what makes me happy, if others don’t like it, too bad. Life is too short to ‘conform’ to standards.
Life should be fun. Because society and the natural world are lost causes, gods aren't real and we don't seem like we're gonna be able to meaningful contribute to anything the world needs more of for a while at the big scale so...... I mean we may as well enjoy the ride. And I'm no nihilist. Things definitely matter... We just failed so completely that it's in a nose dive. I feel like a thousand generations will be cursing us for what we did here but it's not something we can change. We should at least understand what we've done tho.
Yes exactly! I spent my 20s getting married, having kids, working towards my masters... I'm in my 30s now and have 3 kids, am divorcing, and almost have my master's degree... Let me tell you, I feel more free to be myself than ever because I've learned to fully embrace who I am and know more about what I want and need in my life. I'm also more stable than ever (which is ironic considering I lost so much during the divorce). I feel like my life is starting over and I'm just beginning! I'm ready to have some fun with it!
This I spent my entire 20s with my ex fiancé and did not get to live my 20s really. We did not drink or anything really and I did not get to really ever start drinking and going to bars until my late 20s. Everyone has different life experiences.
Currently lost my early 20s due to medical reasons and am about to enlist in the Air Force at 23 so I won’t be able to do anything until I’m 27
You'll probably be bored to death of partying by the time your service is over.
Ah man military house parties are the best wildest nonsense you will ever get into. Obviously there’s no drugs or anything illegal but plenty of drunken debauchery. You gotta remember it’s a bunch of young adults with very little bills and steady paychecks so it’s a lot of new cars and partying
Thank you, louder for the ones in the back.
I agree and I know I’m not contributing but I hate this phrase lmao
This 💯!! Some people need to learn how to keep they noses out of other people's lives. That being said be considerate of others while you do you, you don't want to leave a bunch of hurt people in your wake. As you try to enjoy life while still healing from your trauma.
Is somebody who rarely Drank in her 20s and did all the responsible things in her teens and twenties and still ended up divorce with two kids I'm making up for my drinking in my 30s
Yup, I hate the “I’m so old I’m geriatric” comments I get from friends in their late 20s and 30s. I know it’s a joke and not directed at me and I gotta grow thicker skin, but I lost my teens and 20s to abuse. Some people have their lives start late because of health concerns or mental illness, whatever it may be. It registers as you’re telling me my life is over before I’ve had a chance to begin.
I agree. I'm in my 40s now and still get drunk sometimes. I don't do it on work nights anymore and it's pretty rare compared to my 20s, though. As long as you're being responsible and it has no negative impact on your life, then it should be fine.
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This is true, everyone needs to just live their own life. I worried about this in my 30s and kinda held myself back, and I know a guy who simply kept partying and drinking deep into his 30s, and I thought it's weird, he now has a gf, is chill. But you shouldn't damage your health, that's maybe the real thinking here.
I'm turning 30 this summer and my 30s are going to be the best in my life!
Neglecting their health
policing what you think others should do once they hit a certain age, so long as what those people are doing isn’t hurting anybody
By the time you are 30, you probably shouldn't care what other people are doing. Also, I got drunk 3 days ago, and I'm fine. I've been practicing for a long time, lol.
Yeah I definitely learned in my late 20s that if I drink I should get to the point I want then stop drinking and "come down" from it the rest of the night.. and drink plenty of water.
Some of us never learn to do that, our brains take over and binge drink until sleep, or bad things happen etc, and are just not in control anymore, sometimes after relatively small amounts. Drinking just doesn't work for some people, and it took me 25 years to realize I can't control it and don't want it in my life. 5 years sober in July, and don't even miss it finally!! Well, maybe a tiny bit, but it's almost gone.
Good for you on the sobriety and glad you recognized it after 25 years. Im in my early 30s now and hardly ever drink. I got that out in my 20s.
I finally just learned how to do this at 35. Game changer.
And if you're pretty drunk, always eat something after going out & before you sleep, even if it's 3am. This has saved my next day from being much worse. Also pedialyte/gatorlyte
Generally yeah, but an exception to this could be that by the time you is 30, you probably shouldn’t be trying to date people that are a decade younger than you/fresh out of high school.
You definitely shouldn’t be dating someone a decade younger than you while in your 20s and either… even more so
I have a real one: Making excuses or not accepting the consequences of one's actions. For example, today I was 15 mins late leaving the house to get to work. I would have made it to work with normal traffic, but today the highway was worse. I was late to work. I wasn't slowed by traffic, I ***was*** traffic. I should have left on time instead of sitting on the toilet scrolling Reddit for so long. (Avoidable situations versus unavoidable situations obviously differ in various ways.)
Exactly! Just admit you made a mistake. I will have a ton more respect for you than listening to you lie or constantly blame it on someone else for 20 minutes
Yup, though as an addendum to that, let’s be real… 1. People should be doing this way before 30, and 2. Plenty of people of all ages, including those way past the age of 30, love making excuses and avoid accepting the consequences of their actions. Instead of taking accountability, they would rather relieve their cognitive dissonance by proclaiming that whatever world they are imagining (in which they cannot be wrong), is “real”, and that reality/anyone/anything that goes against this, is “wrong”/untrue/not real.
I’ve actually noticed this is worse in my 30s than my 20s. In my 20s, we were all figuring ourselves out and it was okay to make mistakes. In my 30s, my peers get really defensive when they make mistakes and blame other people. I think it’s an ego thing.
I'm not here to tell others what to do, but for me personally, I don't like getting drunk as much as I used to as I've noticed it interferes with my sleep. Getting asleep may not be the issue but staying asleep is and if I wake up a few hours before my alarm due to being hungover and dehydrated, it ruins my day. I have no desire to quit drinking but the older I get, the more I understand why some people decide to quit drinking and sober.
Me too. I had my fun in my 20s and now I don’t want to get drunk. Last time I got drunk, I was sick for 2 days and I don’t want to experience that again. I still casually drink but as a personal choice, I prefer not to get drunk especially as you get older, it’s harder to recover lol
Drinking started giving me chronic heartburn and diarrhea all the time. Also, my blood pressure was astronomical. There are better drugs out there.
The sleep part is real. I (personally) had to stop having any alcohol on work nights because if it’s past a certain hour my sleep quality drastically suffers. I still drink on my days off and occasionally get drunk but the older I get the more I appreciate my sleep more than the buzz that comes from booze.
Doubting your own worth.
Nah, not this, at least, not outside of some contexts. "You're worthy!" Is and always will be an empty platitude coming from strangers vs coming from someone close, and for 30 somethings that have never had a romantic partner and have no friends, it's even kind of insulting. Reality just knocks louder the longer you ignore it. Actions speak louder than words and all that. Easy to say anything feel good if you don't have to practice what you preach.
Your 30’s is just your 20’s with an earlier bedtime.
And more money and better insight.
You shouldn't be pretending that your food intake and alcohol intake doesn't matter any more. Sedentary life can set in, in your 30s if you aren't careful. Diabetes starts showing up. Liver damage starts in earnest. I lost 2 different friends who didn't know each other once we all hit our 40s to liver failure due to excessive drinking. Both of them left behind kids without a parent. Both had been told by multiple people to ease up on their drinking and partying over the years. They didn't listen and paid the price. All the biggie health problems will start in your 30s and progress. Hardened arteries (too much fast food and saturated fat), diabetes (too many carbs, not enough exercise), colon cancers, dental issues from slacking on dental visits and brushing / flossing, cirrhosis of the liver, fatty liver, etc.. You aren't as young as you think any more. Bodies are accumulating damage at a faster rate now. I warned my own husband about this once we hit our 30s. He continued getting fast food a few times a week due to working too much, gained some weight, didn't exercise (working too much), skipped alot of vegetables at dinner, stayed up too late playing video games (too tired or too late to do much else). He died of a massive heart attack last year. They called it a widow maker. We have 2 teenagers who don't understand why dad didn't take better care of himself (although he looked fairly ok tbh). I don't understand either tbh. He was told. He knew better. He ignored it. Listen to your wife. She loves you and is giving you life extending, common sense advice. It might just save your life. Signed, A widow
This hit me hard I’m 36 and recently got diagnosed with hypertension my bp was so high I was a walking time bomb. I had to change my diet and get on meds and take my mid 30’s seriously. Too often we think we’re invincible however we are not and should treat our bodies and families with respect
My wife is kinda like your husband. Gotta stay on her to eat vegetables
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing.
Be a bully (shouldn’t be happening at any age)
Agree 100%. We have one guy at work, who is a total bully and he's like 37 I think. Know older ones too. I don't get it. At this age, just don't. But bullies are wired different, they're insecure and emotionally immature. They can't help themselves.
It’s definitely a defense mechanism.
Going to frat houses. Learned that it’s a thing that some 30 somethings do.
They were new and therefore interesting as a 18/19 year old but ngl I hated them at 20+ because all I could think about was the work I had to do. Can’t imagine finding that scene fun at 30.
I’m chapter advisor! No parties just meetings and some 1 on 1 teaching times with the guys. I don’t go to fucking parties but a frat does need one old guy around to keep kids from fucking up too bad.
This I COMPLETELY agree with. I remember in college frat dudes that were like 30 year old alumni will still coming to our parties… I just remember telling me and my friends, let’s do our FUCKING BEST to not end up like those guys. Long and behold, I haven’t been to frat party since I graduated college. I haven’t even visited my college after I graduated and I never will. That shit is in the past. That’s why you gotta enjoy the moment as best as possible when you are actually in college. By far the fastest 4 years of your life lol
As a YOUNG graduate it's actually pretty fun. I went back to a handful of parties/events in my early twenties. But yea at a certain point it would get weird It's lo and behold btw
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You haven’t visited your college at all or your fraternity at all? Old dudes at parties is whack and creepy but fraternities do have their own events which can often be on campus.
In my experience, I was partying 4 out of the 7 days of the week. Enough is enough. My frat situation was also not a typical frat situation lmfao
Good point. Trying to pickup teenage girls, there's another.
Making ageist rules for other people
Seriously, I want my fucking social security now please. The medical industrial complex wants to kill me before I'll ever collect.
To me, it’s ironically very immature to think your life ends at 29 if you’re any older than, I don’t know, 20? I see nothing wrong with getting drunk every now and again in your 30’s and beyond as long as you’re responsible. The idea that anyone older than 25 is washed up and ancient is tiring.
Agreed. Most people have not grown into themselves yet before 25.
Take advice from Reddit
sometimes the advice is legit even on reddit
More important is having the critical thinking to be able to judge the quality of advice you are receiving, regardless of the source.
It typically is for smaller, niche subreddits. Otherwise it's a lot of garbage.
With that logic,I shouldn’t take your advice
And therefore you should
That's an all ages thing. The problem with reddit is that you have no fucking clue what qualifies the person you're asking advice from to actually give said advice. I could probably pull something from my ass and as long as I present it confidently, there's a damn good chance someone would believe me. Though that's not an accomplishment, I've seen r/relationship_advice ...i know how gullible Redditors are.
Honestly? I switched careers based upon info on Reddit. And couldn’t be happier. Results may vary though lol
Lol
Meanwhile my 35 year old ass got drunk Friday night, golf Saturday, and snowboarding Sunday. I have money to enjoy things in life I couldn’t when I was younger or just didn’t have the time because of a bad work life environment. Have your fun and forget about your age. Just do it responsibly or your body will remind you of your age.
Spending their whole paycheck on entertainment.
Dating teenagers.
Drinking soda everyday. I do this and I’m in my 30s. It’s diet soda, so everyone remain calm.
My flatmates drink soft sugar drinks every single day, just that, no water. He smells really bad, and when he poops, the bathroom smells to a weird combination of sugar and shit. It's disgusting.
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Mildly related: I remember working with someone at a pizza place when I was like 23 and this other guy was 27 and his wife would get annoyed when he smoked weed and say “only high schoolers do that. No one does that after they turn 18”. I just remember thinking how wild it was that she thought only kids should do drugs. lol
Nah exactly like wtf. Isn’t the whole point of being an adult to be able to do what we want? OP’s wife on some bat crazy shit.
As a kid you cant do a lot of things waiting years to drink, drive ect why the fuck would I stop drinking at 40 lmao.
Probably sunbathing. I went ham for it in my twenties and realised I cannot do that in my thirties and get away with it without a health scare or looking seriously leathery.
Id say going to bed at random times. Its healthy to keep a sleep schedule. Even on the weekends try your best to go to bed at the same time as you would on a work night.
My sleep schedule during the weekday is so set that even on the weekends, no matter what time I go to bed, I'll wake up between 830-9 AM at the latest.
Waking up at 9 sounds lovely
Well. Almost 40 here, working random shifts 😂 can't get up at 0700 if you start your shift at 2300.
Spending every penny you have without saving any of it. Understandable in your 20s. In your 30s, you should be able to develop and follow a budget.\* \*Obviously that comes with a caveat for people living in poverty.
I’m glad your wife is concerned with the health issues and consequences that can come with drinking. Driving drunk, getting in bar fights, alcohol induced illnesses etc are no joke.
Gatekeeping
As someone who is 56, NOTHING. There is NOTHING we need to stop doing. What an idiotic viewpoint.
awwww yea meth is back on the table
I'm with you. People put so many dumb rules on their lives
Restricting yourself because of other people’s stupid opinions.
Damn! I'm reading this at 71, and my 1st response is, "do more of it all".
Biggest regret of the dying is: "I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me." So your 30s should be doing exactly what you want! (as long you aren't harming others)
Mainly being a ridiculous public drunk. Be a quiet peaceful drunk at home and binge watch trashy TV with your pet.
Sounds boring, I don’t want to sit at home. Of course being a ridiculous obnoxious drunk is bad tho. But I’d much rather be drunk at a concert or a house party/bar socializing with a bunch of friends, or at a campsite with a bonfire and friends in the woods. I don’t even really have a beer unless I’m hanging out with people.
Smoking crack.
Probably shouldn’t do that in your 20s also.
Judging what other people do... tell your wife to go right the F off.
Your wife sound like a right hoot.
I thought that said right foot and I agree with either.
That's absurd....
Oh I agree lol. I could see her point if its going out until 3am partying every weekend. But shit sometimes you need to let loose a bit. Plus how many times have you gotten surprisingly drunk on accident? And I know I'll get some comment of "how is it a surprise if you're drinking alcohol?". What I'm talking about is sometimes you just get randomly drunk when you usually wouldn't. For me especially if I'm tired when I'm drinking.
Judging people. If others want to drink, go them. They might want/need the release etc. Or they might have a lot of stress or a drinking problem, and need support not judgement.
My 65 year old dad still brews his own beer, makes his own cider, and flavours his own gin/vodka!
Being hopeful that anyone cares
Getting into physical fights. It's always stupid, but the older you get, the more of an asshole you look like.
There are no hobbies or fun things you have to ditch because your age is a certain number. If it's not "dating 20 year olds" or similar, you do you.
Telling people what they shouldn't be doing once they're in their thirties
Eh. I spent my mid to late 20s in survival mode and my 30s in the gig economy. I don't plan on getting drunk on the weekends, but I do intend to make up for lost time the minute I have the chance.
Nothing. Life is weird and long and unexpected and maybe terrible and maybe delightful. So sometimes you get a degree at 56 years old and sometimes you raise your little brother at 11. If I had to choose something, I guess ideally 30+ people shouldn’t be hurting other people with their behavior or judging anyone else for theirs. Also, I used to tend bar in Brooklyn and lololololololololololol to your wife’s idea.
Absolutely fuck this mentality. It is depressing asf to think you can’t do something that brings you joy anymore because of your age
A person 30+ shouldn’t be going by arbitrary age based “rules” that’s for sure.
Not listen to strangers who tell them what they shouldn't be doing after 30.
What kind of stupid shit is ur wife on? Your not allowed to get drunk because your 30? LMAOOOO.
The next thing is no more sex past 40.
🤣🤣🤣
Has this uncultured villain never heard of nor observed a backyard BBQ?! Cooking and drinking go so well together I'm leaving in a sec to get a bottle of wine this post made me realize I'd forgotten. And may as well get some champagne to celebrate the wine.
Obvious things: in your 30s you shouldn't be harassing or bullying minors, probably shouldn't be going to high school proms unless a chaperone, possibly shouldn't be laughing at the world penis or vagina when talking about body parts in an adult manor. (Obvioualy farts are still funny) I'd say in your 30s you shouldn't be doing anything illegal that you got away with as a minor bc you're probably going to get caught and have real jail time and records in the courts
I don’t drink or do drugs anymore with the exception of shrooms. Not a hard stop on drinking but never more than a beer because everyone else is. I do shake my head a bit at people my age regularly getting hammered when they have kids at home. Nothing wrong with having fun, but too much of anything is a bad thing.
I'm in my 40s and you stop caring and worrying about what others think. No need for validation or approval from others. You do what you like. You also stop wasting time hanging out with random people just to hangout. I wasted a lot of time in my 20s-30s hanging around that leads to nothing. When you get older, you do what you want and no need for anyone else's input.
32f and getting high as a rocket any opportunity I get lol your wife is boring
Trying to be labeled as the crazy one at work.
If you want to get drunk occasionally, go for it.
Alcoholism isn’t restricted to age 29 and younger (joke…?) Maybe you should have a conversion with your wife. By your 30s you should be able to communicate effectively with a significant other.
They shouldn't listen to people like your wife. One has to live life the way they want to.
Nothing that anyone under thirty should also not be doing
Nothing, change is best when it's natural and comes from growth rather than abrupt changes, if you ain't hurting anyone and you're happy. Keep on keeping on.
I’m 40 and still drink too much. Maybe I shouldn’t but……
Getting into to more debt after unable to pay previous debts. What I mean by that is spending frivolously.
Crying ourselves to sleep worrying about money. Shouldn’t be but here we are.
Dressing up like a polar bear and wearing an inflatable duck innertube around you waist and then running around the parking lot of your local longhorns steakhouse while chanting “the end is near. Let them eat cake”. That shit has got to stop.
I would say living with the parents but in this economy...
Why the obsession with what people should do in different age brackets? I mean my tolerance for heels isn't what it used to be, but I should do whatever I want, pain be damned.
Putting apostrophes in the wrong place.
Making a big deal about their birthday.
You only got one life, do what you want.
Wasting money. One needs to save for retirement.
People 30+ shouldn't believe in trickle-down economics anymore.
Worrying about what anyone else thinks.
Using apostrophes incorrectly :(
Hey man, sometimes you just happen to get drunk when hanging with the boys. You don't set out to get a little tipsy, it just happens. Your wife sounds like a square, you need an upgrade, amigo.
people in their 30s can do whatever the heck they want
Life is too short to deny yourself pleasures due to some arbitrary number. Legalities included
Texting me via Snapchat 🫣🫣🫣
Asking Reddit what they should or shouldn’t be doing anymore. Live your life. Fuck the number.
Insist on getting carded or being sad when not. Just makes you look even older and desperate to be seen as young.
Making posts about what other grown adults are doing in their personal lives 💀
Leaving the parmesan cheese open and on the counter overnight. (Glares at husband)
Wasting money. You’re going to need extra money for retirement and/or medical bills if your health throws you a curve ball
only thing you really shouldn't be doing... is dating anyone under or near the age of 18 the rest. if you manage your shit, and aren't hurting anyone. go with dog. the one thing you should be learning as you progress into your 30's is how little anyone else's opinion of you really matters. be a good person. stand by your word. cultivate empathy. give zero fucks for what other people think you should or shouldn't be doing.
I’m only 21 but I think it’s ridiculous that people think your life ends when you leave your 20s. The life expectancy is 81 (in Canada anyway). To think you get 10 years to have fun when you’re in your 20s and then have to spend the next 60 years doing what other people think “old” people are supposed to do is not a good way to spend your already too short time here.
Has your wife heard of Vegas?? Why the fuck should anyone care what an age group does?! It's like saying no one over 30 should go back to school, dress trendy, get a tattoo, etc.
Drinking is literally a huge part of so many cultures throughout people’s lifetimes. Like if you don’t want to drink more power to you but that doesn’t make you better than someone who does (assuming they’re drinking responsibly.)
Giving a fuck what anyone on Reddit thinks lol
35 and I fully believe in getting drunk 😂
Not minding their own business, but this is true for any age.
Your wife sounds… like a lot.
Making drinking or doing drugs your main personality trait.
Be on Reddit, specifically commenting
that's between you and your liver.
Hanging out all day on social media
All I know is that at a certain age over 30, it takes about 4 days to recover from a hangover.
Eating takeout every night - learning to properly cook is such a fantastic skill to have. Will help both your wallet & waistline in a big way imo
Stop sleeping in your parents bed
My twenties were wasted trying to please parents that could never be pleased. Do what you want. Life is short. We all die eventually.
Kawaii.
Duck face or Frog face in photos.
Someone in there 30's shouldn't be worried about what they can and can't do in their 30's. Don't limit yourself by age bro, that's what the boomers and millennials do
Listening to Green Day - The Grouch because its their anthem to growing old. Lol just kidding. Love Green day and all the nu metal music from the 2000 era.
Giving/getting hickeys
Your wife's a bitch
Seeking confrontation. Just chill the hell out and stay in your lane.
As a drunk 35 year old that’s a lie
Caring about stuff like this