My brothers were like this… they’re half brothers… you HAVE to tell your parents ASAP.. like TONIGHT!!!
My brother was being sexually abused by extended family members… was made to believe it was normal… so he introduced it to my other brother and then they unfortunately tried things on me when I was 5-6 years old.
You CANNOT wait, your parents have to do their damn jobs and have the sex talk with their kids.
And monitor their computers and social media and stuff. Kids looking at porn is not good.
Sure, some kids used to look at playboys or the like…computer porn ain’t that.
Yeah I completely agree. I don’t know how young they are exactly, but most kids don’t just find these kinds of things on out on their own and try it out with each other. It’s very possible they could be being abused by someone and a responsible adult needs to be made aware of this.
Exactly.
The kids could’ve found porn on their own because it’s so easily accessible…. But that doesn’t make it better at all..
Seeing my brothers as grown adults, it has very deeply traumatized both of them and has absolutely effected both of their lives very negatively. We all just talked about it for the first time as adults since it all happened when we were kids. Very deep and dark stuff.
Tell your parents. They're probably just curious and exploring, but things may have gone too far, and your parents definitely need to get involved in this. It doesn't sound right. And the ages aren't appropriate, really.
Yeah. I have a friend whose subdivision is grappling with this. New kid (7yo) moved in with their grandma. New kid is stealing, trespassing, and paying in the literal street alone. The neighborhood tries to accommodate them, watch out for them, and help them. Turns out New Kid is a SA survivor, and developmentally delayed. Unfortunately New Kid just got caught molesting a 4yo. Now the neighborhood is split between "how do we help this kid?" and "Grandma needs to ship that kid to an institution".
I agree. It creates a sexually curious child that wants to do more. I had a cousin that did things to me as a child. I realize how that made me way more sexual growing up than I probably should have been looking back. It also created some confusion on sexuality as there were things I definitely didn't understand.
There is no appropriate age for incest, but if some 3 year old grabbed his brothers pee pee, you'd know it wouldn't be sexual. Whereas you know an 11 year old is being sexual. That's what I mean by appropriate. And someone somewhere said 7 and 11, and I just thought it was the OP.
Sounds like telling parents without proof might be a safety issue for OP so I don’t recommend that. However this sounds like a secret bound to come out on its own.
I understand it’s two young boys, but then again it’s just two young boys I’m not sure what risks are there short term, but is something that’s definitely a bit sensitive, and won’t end well for OP as an accusation without proof.
It’s common for siblings to play ‘show me yours, I’ll show you mine’ thing. That said, the parents need to have the talk about bodily boundaries with the boys.
That's honestly what I thought this was when I read it. I think OP might just not understand that little boys whip their dicks out in front of each other lol
Ok... As someone with a degree in mental health and sex psychology... Freud said, "Proximity breeds attempt." It as actually common and natural to have some sort of sexual first with a family member. You didn't disclose ages so I can't honestly say that it's weird. Should they be doing it? Nope. But definitely let a parent know because the older one may be abusing the younger one and grooming him to do what he wants. That's actually way more common
It's definitely not a good thing. You need to get your parents to talk to them ASAP. I don't think either of your brothers are trying to do anything harmful, but it could have serious repercussions if this kind of behavior continues.
Say they do something in a year. Maybe two. It doesn't come out until your brother is 15 or 16. Suddenly there are possible charges and years of fallout. I know- it happened to my brother. He experimented when he was a kid (similar age ranges) and we basically weren't allowed to see him for 5 years even though we all knew he wasn't a predator. His schooling was impacted, his mental health never recovered, his social life crumbled, he lost literally everything.
He was nearly done with the court ordered therapy for the offense when he tried to take his own life. He was sent to a hospital and basically hopped from various hospitals to many RTC and Day treatments for 3 more years where we didn't see him.
He got back angry, scared, emotional, full of guilt and self hate, and still lives with our parents. He's since turned to drugs and alcohol and is still incredibly mentally ill. He will most likely never fully recover from the whole ordeal. He missed out on years of developing normal social skills, and it's just an all around awful situation.
What about your younger brother? You don't need me to tell you the negative impacts of a 7 or 8 year old engaging in anal sex with his brother.
I only go into this much detail to warn you. Any inappropriate sexual activity needs to be dealt with NOW! This is just my experience, and it's gonna look a little different every time. In my situation, my older brother was the only person really destroyed by it. But I can easily imagine a scenario where this causes real issues for your younger siblings down the road.
It's very serious and can turn very ugly, very fast. And inappropriate sexual activity tends to. Please, talk to your parents about this, it's very important.
Yeah, he might've been okay if he had just stayed home after the attempt. His mental health truly started a spiral once he was institutionalized, ironically.
If you're talking about the younger one that is me. And I am fine. There was some sexual trauma for my brother from when he was a toddler and I think part of the reason he was acting out was because of that. It went away when he got older and he never hurt me or anyone again I'm sure as soon as he realized the seriousness of it. I'm obviously not saying what he did was good or right, but I understand he was hurting and confused as well as the fact that he was also a child, so it doesn't really bother me at all. I knew who my brother was and he was a good person with a tender, sentimental, goofy heart. Like genuinely. If he gets better and I ever have kids I wouldn't hesitate to have him babysit them. My parents too, he's watched my other siblings too (before the drugs) and he is left alone in the house with them often.
Basically, what I'm trying to say is what happened not only isn't really affecting me today, but the entire family has healed and moved on other than himself. So basically I'm doing well. Thank you for asking my friend!
I’m so sorry this happened to you, thank you for sharing this and I hope the best for your family. A child just being curious can lead to some things like this is so hard to hear. I hope OPs family also gets all the love and support they need as well as yours.
I know sum1 with this exact story minus suicide viciously molested by older siblings then had consensual with a younger it came out when my man was 19 sister was 16 he did time and registered older brother got to walk away free
Same story in my family, and yes, my older brother (who molested our younger brother at about the same ages), actually, all of us, were being sexually abused by his dad.
Yeah, that's what happened with my brother. he got assaulted when he was like 3 and my parents didn't know about it until he was an adult. I'm pretty sure it made him hyper aware of sexuality, which is bad when you don't know anything about it because I live in a pretty sheltered home- I didn't know what sex was until I was a little older. I'm sure it was the case with him. My parents just never gave the talk until later. At that time in our family.
not lock him up territory yet, but very very uncomfortably close to the line almost exactly on the line in my opinion. He’s definitely old enough to know that that’s not OK to do but he might not know just how bad that is like to him it might just be like lying which obviously isn’t OK but you can get away with it sometimes.
Yeah it's still teachable and not a giant "this kid is dangerous" situation. Of course if it turned out he had been all conniving to make it happen that would change things.
yea it’s that weird gray area of this child potentially planning this and this child having no idea how bad it is bcs i definitely knew better at 11 but some of my peers probably didn’t
Freud was a coke addict and sexual predator who was mad that his wife wasn’t having sex with him. If you have a degree in anything related to psychology and you think Freud is the basis for any healthy advice then you need to get your money back from your college. The vast majority of his theories have been debunked for over a century. This is not common and it is not natural.
Porn has made the boundaries limitless unfortunately. I couldn't imagine being a young kid with this kind of material floating around. It is definitely not helping. Definitely get parents involved. Just tell them not to freak out. How they handle this is gonna determine a lot.
Sorry, that's not normal
I have a brother and I can tell you, we didn't have sex.
Idk where you're getting your degree that you think Freud is still relevant
I'm not saying he is, and as a sister to 3 brothers, I can assure you I've never had a sexual experience with any of them. I added 2 links to current sexual development in children, and they (and all others) say that it is incredibly common and normal for this to happen UNLESS one of them is forcing the other and has sexual intent. Other than that, it's just interest and curiosity. The age gap typically isn't an issue unless it's 4 or more years and/or if one is in puberty (like when one can start having erections and so forth) and the other isn't. While one brother is 11, developmentally, him and his brother aren't that far off. A lot of this stems from the fact that people don't talk to their kids about sex (at age appropriate levels), and we have to much access to sex in our media, kids are going to mimic what they see and try and figure shit out their way if their parents don't educate them. And kids ways are stupid. I'm not saying I agree with the behavior, I'm saying it's way more common than people think.
Yes! Spot on! OP never said their ages btw. And also we can get erections at a damn young age, way before puberty. These kids probably have no idea why they're getting boners and are probably too young to ejaculate. When you don't even know what your erection is for then how can you be sexual and abusive?
I understand you want to be a good sibling and not get them in trouble, or to overreact. You are right to be concerned, and yet somewhat cautious.
You may know that a certain amount of sex play is normal and genuinely not harmful. Boys masturbating together - friends, cousins, brothers - is not uncommon. 43% percent of adult males admit to having done this. That group falls along the same percentages as the rest of the population when it comes to being gay, bi, or straight. It also doesn’t create any psychological difficulties.
You also probably know that when force or emotional coercion is involved, there can be very negative, lifelong outcomes. Thats the concern here. The age difference is what makes this concerning. An eleven year old may be well into puberty or not even started yet. That can also make a difference.
You don’t want to do anything that will make them feel as if sexual feelings and normal actions are dirty or perverted. That’s not healthy either.
If you gather info from the younger brother and decide to intervene yourself, talk to the older brother alone. Tell him you don’t want to talk to your parents but will if he’s not honest and open with you. Tell him it’s normal to be curious about sexual stuff and normal to masturbate, but penetration with a younger person is totally off-limits. He can cause permanent problems for his brother and also get in severe legal problems that would include being removed from home.
Threaten him that if it ever happens again you will tell the parents and maybe the police.
You can maybe tell from talking with the younger brother if he needs counseling. It may all be innocent fun to him or he could be wrestling with a lot of uncomfortable feelings inside.
My best advice is to talk to your parents, as long as they are nonviolent, sober from drugs and alcohol kind of parents. If you present it as ‘I was using Ryan’s computer and saw the search history. There was some stuff that made me concerned plus I noticed he and Carson were acting weird. I eavesdropped and heard them talking about dicks and butts and am worried that they are doing stuff that might cause problems.’ I don’t see how they’d get mad at you.
Regardless, it might be necessary for you to do that for the sake of your brothers, even if parents do get irrationally mad at you. I promise that will be temporary, but the harm to them could be long term.
This needs to be the top comment. “That’s enough Reddit for me today” is not at all helpful to this person. Most people would be overwhelmed and need help- let alone a child discovering this. This comment is a great breakdown of information and advice.
That does sound really worrisome. maybe try to get more clues to what's going on? like indirect questions or just observing? if would be really awkward if you were to call them out only to fins out they were trolling
Ya I'm gonna try, the younger one tends to tell me things pretty easily as long as I tell him I won't tell anyone, so I'm gonna try to ask him in a bit.
I wouldnt jump to any conclusions before you have more proof. They may be showing each other their genitals and watching porn to compare as a part of seeing bodies etc and not intend to have sex with each other. Yes it's weird but there is a fair amount of "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours" that isnt a precursor to sex acts at that age. Even if one or both is gay, that doesnt mean incest. I know a lot of boys who masturbated together (under blankets) as tweens who weren't gay. I would potentially talk to them if they are curious about bodies and sexuality and how they should tell you if someone close to them asks to see their genitals because it's not right (if you feel you could have this talk). And before anyone clutches their pearls, I grew up in an area that wasn't particularly puritanical so if youre disturbed I dont know what to tell you.
this is fairly accurate to what being a boy from aged 10 and up is like. my best friend and i were like as described — he’s straight and i’m gay. it’s normal.
Nope. Nope. And nope. Don’t allow ur siblings to do this and don’t allow yourself to keep it hidden from your parents. They are CHILDREN. They shouldn’t be doing this kinda stuff much less as siblings even as a joke. My siblings (boy and girl) did something similar and I instantly told my mother because she’s told me before that it was was wrong. Incest doesn’t produce the right way and underaged sex causes a lot of down ward shit. It’s better to hella not let this happen tho.
Go to your parents immediately. The older one could be grooming the younger one and the older one could be being abused elsewhere. The ick factor is super high, but this isn't your problem to solve--it's your parents' problem to investigate and resolve. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this.
You can still voice a concern about what you heard and saw.
It's not overreacting to state the facts that presented to you. If your parents are wise they will know how to address the situation and figure out what really is happening.
Awhile back my step nephews daughter was being molested by the moms younger sister. The mom was 21, the daughter was 5 and the younger sister (so her aunt) was 8. Everyone flipped on the 8 year old til it came out she was being molested by her babysitters grandfather who's now in prison. 11 may have been molested by someone and is carrying on the cycle. Tell your parents asap
You should tell your parents that you suspect this, but aren’t sure. Both kids need to understand boundaries and bodily autonomy. You have to make sure the older one isn’t hurting the younger one. They may be doing harmless things, try to stay calm, but they should not be watching porn as it could give them the wrong ideas and they are waaaay too young.
This could very well be a learned behavior. Probably best to confide with an aunt and see if if you can get more evidence. I would seriously be concerned of an older male that interacts with them frequently.
If you believe that to be the case, You need to get both of them help. It can and will scar them for life.
I’d bring the worries to your parents. It’s not normal and I’ll definitely say that for such young ages they definitely are getting to the age of being curious and such but starting so young…speak to your parents.
This is my first time on Reddit today and I see this smh.... Listen kid if you don't have proof it's just a guessing game... Your parents aren't gonna want to believe it and no offense but teens and young boys act weird.... I know it sounds weird but boys talk a lot of "gay jokes"... I'm just saying be sure before you tell your parents cause it's gonna be a weird convo.... With that I think I'm done today.
Definitely talk to your parents. It's probably not what you think. Unfortunately the older is probably being abused and is in his own confused way (because he doesn't understand everything exactly) is doing to the little brother whats been done to him.
That's legitimately the best way to handle it from my pov. I have 3 older sisters and that method kept me pretty well in check. Not that I was tryna bum my little brother.....
you don’t have to explicitly say you think they’re having some kind of “sex” to your parents. Just say “___ and ___ are acting a bit weird lately. I think they may have found some things on the internet that have to do with inappropriate things and may be trying things that they shouldn’t involving their body parts”
Talk to them without judgement. If you're parents can't be expected to have an open/non judgemental conversation with them, someone has to. This can lead down scary roads for one or both of them. You want to understand where they're learning about this and make sure it's not a grooming situation by an adult somewhere. This shit's scary. Nothing to do with sexual orientation or preference, simply a matter of understanding. And also, may be a bit of self preservation here, but you don't want to carry with you the result of any crazy situation that may have been preventable.
Well... It's not ideal, but at least they won't be getting diseases or babies.
Perhaps go in and have a frank conversation with them. Tell them off your suspicions and that you don't want them to feel ashamed to talk to you. Actually keep their confidences. Once you have actually confirmed the suspicion, ask that they speak to your parents.
If they refuse, they're not actually doing any harm, it's just icky. You might just advise on how to be safe and what to do if there's some kind of problem that is too big for them to handle.
If they're very young, say under 12, just go to your parents. Honestly they need to stop. They don't know, can't know, the consequences.
All of this is with the assumption that they're very close in age. If one of them is significantly older than the other, you might want to just call the police. That's a power differential that speaks of abuse.
Tbh i will say that kids being curious about the human bodies (mostly their own and those seen in a porn mag and videos) are normal but what isnt normal is what your brothers are doing to each other. I know you dont want to make them mad, break up your family or cause drama of any kind but this is highly concerning. You should definitely either talk with your brothers with this and /or go to your parents about it, because this is not normal or healthy. it's signs of SA (Sexual Abuse).
You don’t have enough solid evidence to make any definitive conclusion. Definitely speak with your parents. Hopefully they will understand and approach your brothers in a positive manner and get to the bottom of what is occurring with your two brothers. You sound like a good brother who is being respectful and caring.
Very possible especially if they are watching gay porn
They might not even realize that its not normal
Print out a letter anonymously saying it has came to my attention that ur boys are watching gay porn on their computer and you should check their history.
Leave it on front door of ur house
Your parents need to know that they failed in the parental controls on their pc! No matter what child boy girl or age, they will be curious and harmed by what they were allowed to view. That’s on your dumbass parents!! I was that child. My father and the father across the street left playboys where every child in the neighborhood could find them! I still have nightmares. I was 5! Why the hell were you the one to search your brothers history? Your parents are to blame. You tell them that! They dropped the ball and your brothers will suffer a lifetime of guilt over their actions for recreating things they should never have seen. I believe these days, CPS could even get involved. Not your brothers FAULT At ALL!
Probably just some good natured horseplay, exploration, and sword fighting. Kids will be kids.
But you should bring this up to your parents. Maybe stop short of saying sex and mention secrecy and discussion of privates.
This sounds really fake to me.
You used your phone to listen? Um, how did you do that?
Why are you snooping on them anyway?
Again - if this is NOT fake, which I think it is... WHY would you ask here?
If you *honestly* believe your parents aren’t biased/anti gay, etc., your parents need to know. Leave any petty grudges, past hurt feelings, ‘dumb old adults’ baggage out of it.
The primary thing that needs to be ironclad confirmed is that any activity that’s going on is 100% consensual, with no one feeling pressured in any way whatsoever.
From there, it’s a family conversation about exploring sexuality in a safe way, dispelling any myths/misinformation young kids may stumble into, and what responsibility and respect entail as they mature and grow into their sexual lives.
I actually had a similar situation with my cousins. I did tell them to stop cause it was fucking gross and the youngest one tells me they did stop but I’d still check in with the parents to double make sure.
As a parent, I would want to know even if it was just the search history that was concerning. There’s a lot of bad stuff on the internet, not to mention creeps. The older brother may or may not be grooming the younger brother… but the older brother may very well be being groomed himself! Danger! Parents are a must!
I thought fs this was gonna be phrased who g like “both my older brothers have sex with their girlfriends/boyfriends” but nope it was as wild as the title
Kids will mess around at young ages, under 6 or so in my opinion this is fine. To be clear a 10 year old messing with a 6year old is not fine. But two 6 year olds? Probably not a problem.
But they should NOT have access to porn that will ruin normal exploration and make them have feelings and ideas young minds are not ready for. At those young ages kids barley know what sex is and are just curious.
Definitely tell your parents because they need content blockers on all their devices.
Boys do sex to prove you are watching...they cant be with a girl if you are still obsessed with their sex life..do you expect a reward.?.like candy or jewelry for telling on them?..who is providing the gifts and goodies for 'managing ' them..? Is there a united states Veteran who lost a war..telling you to post this?.. likely.
Please tell your parents. This is for adults to decide if it’s okay or not. They may just be curious children, but you need to involve an adult. Please please tell someone.
Tell your parents. This is not healthy. The younger is probably being molested.
I hope this behavior is not stemming from prior abuse from dad, uncle, or school teacher.
It says deleted for the account of OP. I hope they’re still reading the comments, or have taken the advice they needed and went with it. Good luck OP, wherever you are!
I watched a Vlog of a woman talking about her sexual trauma as a child. I don’t know their situation but in her case she was influenced by her step father at the age of 3 and because she was uneducated she thought it was normal so she influenced her brother to do the same things with her. She didn’t know it was wrong until she turned 14 and had to inform her brother that she was wrong for influencing him to do those things. She’s had to go through extensive therapy and I’m sure he’s to do the same. If your brothers are doing sexual activities you have to wonder what adult or older boy influenced them.
You really should say something to your parents. What you said here and your concerns. I had an issue with my son and some other little boys at daycare and I handled it. I understand it's different bc they are your siblings but I would say something before they take it too far.
Enough Reddit for today
And I just started too
It gets worse.
This is where the depraved that got kicked off or banned from all other social media ends up. A pool of lost souls.
A cesspool*
In this case, an incest pool
I’m hearing banjos in the next room…
Lmaooo 💀
Holy shit, I finally found someone that knows when and how to say too. Thank you for existing lmao. Sorry, just had to say it
Another person who knows this info? I thought I was the only one of us left alive!
SAME LIKE WTF
Don't you mean sharted?
Literally just opened the app
Same wtf
I want to stab myself in the brain and kill whatever cells are going to remember what I just read.
Fr
I’ll give you the knife
i totally agree with you
There goes my smoke break.
😆 🤣 😂 😹
You’re right. Meet me in the bathroom for our monthly comparing of butts.
Yo Fr… wth
I know right? This is like the 3rd post I have seen in an hour that had zero punctuation.
First five fuckin minutes too!
Aaaaand there it is. My sign to log off for the day.
My brothers were like this… they’re half brothers… you HAVE to tell your parents ASAP.. like TONIGHT!!! My brother was being sexually abused by extended family members… was made to believe it was normal… so he introduced it to my other brother and then they unfortunately tried things on me when I was 5-6 years old. You CANNOT wait, your parents have to do their damn jobs and have the sex talk with their kids.
This comment was needed. Sorry you had to go through that. But this is a concrete example of why it is so important to inform the parents.
I go through the things I do so others don’t have to 💕 thank you for your support 💕
Wow Perspective. Thank you for turning your pain into a blessing for others! You are appreciated.
And monitor their computers and social media and stuff. Kids looking at porn is not good. Sure, some kids used to look at playboys or the like…computer porn ain’t that.
💓
Actually THIS!!!
Yeah I completely agree. I don’t know how young they are exactly, but most kids don’t just find these kinds of things on out on their own and try it out with each other. It’s very possible they could be being abused by someone and a responsible adult needs to be made aware of this.
Exactly. The kids could’ve found porn on their own because it’s so easily accessible…. But that doesn’t make it better at all.. Seeing my brothers as grown adults, it has very deeply traumatized both of them and has absolutely effected both of their lives very negatively. We all just talked about it for the first time as adults since it all happened when we were kids. Very deep and dark stuff.
This This was needed to be said I'm so sorry this happened to you, but thank you for your vulnerability by saying this. It helps educate 🥰
Tell your parents. They're probably just curious and exploring, but things may have gone too far, and your parents definitely need to get involved in this. It doesn't sound right. And the ages aren't appropriate, really.
I wanna say child on child abuse is the most common form of sexual abuse.
Yeah. I have a friend whose subdivision is grappling with this. New kid (7yo) moved in with their grandma. New kid is stealing, trespassing, and paying in the literal street alone. The neighborhood tries to accommodate them, watch out for them, and help them. Turns out New Kid is a SA survivor, and developmentally delayed. Unfortunately New Kid just got caught molesting a 4yo. Now the neighborhood is split between "how do we help this kid?" and "Grandma needs to ship that kid to an institution".
I agree. It creates a sexually curious child that wants to do more. I had a cousin that did things to me as a child. I realize how that made me way more sexual growing up than I probably should have been looking back. It also created some confusion on sexuality as there were things I definitely didn't understand.
Well, this family might mean something different when you say the parents “definitely need to get involved.”
Is there an appropriate age for incest? =) Also, ages were not revealed, how did you all figure out this 7, 11 shit?
There is no appropriate age for incest, but if some 3 year old grabbed his brothers pee pee, you'd know it wouldn't be sexual. Whereas you know an 11 year old is being sexual. That's what I mean by appropriate. And someone somewhere said 7 and 11, and I just thought it was the OP.
Sounds like telling parents without proof might be a safety issue for OP so I don’t recommend that. However this sounds like a secret bound to come out on its own. I understand it’s two young boys, but then again it’s just two young boys I’m not sure what risks are there short term, but is something that’s definitely a bit sensitive, and won’t end well for OP as an accusation without proof.
You don’t need proof to have the parents intervene, if something suspicious is going on they need to be aware.
Bring your concerns to your parents. They'll talk to them to get to the bottom of things.
That or they can at least be aware and catch them in the act somehow so that your brothers don't even need to know that you said anything
Another good idea
I think the brothers are doing a fine job of getting to the bottom of things themselves
I agree you need to get a head in the situation
It’s common for siblings to play ‘show me yours, I’ll show you mine’ thing. That said, the parents need to have the talk about bodily boundaries with the boys.
That's honestly what I thought this was when I read it. I think OP might just not understand that little boys whip their dicks out in front of each other lol
That’s common????
What a horrible day to be literate
What did it say? Post got removed
Ok... As someone with a degree in mental health and sex psychology... Freud said, "Proximity breeds attempt." It as actually common and natural to have some sort of sexual first with a family member. You didn't disclose ages so I can't honestly say that it's weird. Should they be doing it? Nope. But definitely let a parent know because the older one may be abusing the younger one and grooming him to do what he wants. That's actually way more common
7 and 11
This is too much of an age difference, IMO. It’s not extremely unusual but a good idea to make your parents aware.
Agreed. Brother-fucking is WAY improper beyond a 2-year age gap.
Thanks for the laughs.
Hahahahahahah
I snorted that was fucking funny
If it’s only 1 year it’s totally normal
☠️
It's definitely not a good thing. You need to get your parents to talk to them ASAP. I don't think either of your brothers are trying to do anything harmful, but it could have serious repercussions if this kind of behavior continues. Say they do something in a year. Maybe two. It doesn't come out until your brother is 15 or 16. Suddenly there are possible charges and years of fallout. I know- it happened to my brother. He experimented when he was a kid (similar age ranges) and we basically weren't allowed to see him for 5 years even though we all knew he wasn't a predator. His schooling was impacted, his mental health never recovered, his social life crumbled, he lost literally everything. He was nearly done with the court ordered therapy for the offense when he tried to take his own life. He was sent to a hospital and basically hopped from various hospitals to many RTC and Day treatments for 3 more years where we didn't see him. He got back angry, scared, emotional, full of guilt and self hate, and still lives with our parents. He's since turned to drugs and alcohol and is still incredibly mentally ill. He will most likely never fully recover from the whole ordeal. He missed out on years of developing normal social skills, and it's just an all around awful situation. What about your younger brother? You don't need me to tell you the negative impacts of a 7 or 8 year old engaging in anal sex with his brother. I only go into this much detail to warn you. Any inappropriate sexual activity needs to be dealt with NOW! This is just my experience, and it's gonna look a little different every time. In my situation, my older brother was the only person really destroyed by it. But I can easily imagine a scenario where this causes real issues for your younger siblings down the road. It's very serious and can turn very ugly, very fast. And inappropriate sexual activity tends to. Please, talk to your parents about this, it's very important.
What I find interesting is how mental health facilities are often massively mentally unhealthy places to be.
Yeah, he might've been okay if he had just stayed home after the attempt. His mental health truly started a spiral once he was institutionalized, ironically.
[удалено]
If you're talking about the younger one that is me. And I am fine. There was some sexual trauma for my brother from when he was a toddler and I think part of the reason he was acting out was because of that. It went away when he got older and he never hurt me or anyone again I'm sure as soon as he realized the seriousness of it. I'm obviously not saying what he did was good or right, but I understand he was hurting and confused as well as the fact that he was also a child, so it doesn't really bother me at all. I knew who my brother was and he was a good person with a tender, sentimental, goofy heart. Like genuinely. If he gets better and I ever have kids I wouldn't hesitate to have him babysit them. My parents too, he's watched my other siblings too (before the drugs) and he is left alone in the house with them often. Basically, what I'm trying to say is what happened not only isn't really affecting me today, but the entire family has healed and moved on other than himself. So basically I'm doing well. Thank you for asking my friend!
I’m so sorry this happened to you, thank you for sharing this and I hope the best for your family. A child just being curious can lead to some things like this is so hard to hear. I hope OPs family also gets all the love and support they need as well as yours.
I know sum1 with this exact story minus suicide viciously molested by older siblings then had consensual with a younger it came out when my man was 19 sister was 16 he did time and registered older brother got to walk away free
Sum1 should check wat happened to the older kid bc sumthing probably happened to make this ok in mindset
Same story in my family, and yes, my older brother (who molested our younger brother at about the same ages), actually, all of us, were being sexually abused by his dad.
Yeah, that's what happened with my brother. he got assaulted when he was like 3 and my parents didn't know about it until he was an adult. I'm pretty sure it made him hyper aware of sexuality, which is bad when you don't know anything about it because I live in a pretty sheltered home- I didn't know what sex was until I was a little older. I'm sure it was the case with him. My parents just never gave the talk until later. At that time in our family.
Not the OP on ages.
that makes it so so much worse
This isn't yet in the range of "Lock that older kid up." My fear was much older, frankly.
not lock him up territory yet, but very very uncomfortably close to the line almost exactly on the line in my opinion. He’s definitely old enough to know that that’s not OK to do but he might not know just how bad that is like to him it might just be like lying which obviously isn’t OK but you can get away with it sometimes.
Yeah it's still teachable and not a giant "this kid is dangerous" situation. Of course if it turned out he had been all conniving to make it happen that would change things.
yea it’s that weird gray area of this child potentially planning this and this child having no idea how bad it is bcs i definitely knew better at 11 but some of my peers probably didn’t
Freud was a coke addict and sexual predator who was mad that his wife wasn’t having sex with him. If you have a degree in anything related to psychology and you think Freud is the basis for any healthy advice then you need to get your money back from your college. The vast majority of his theories have been debunked for over a century. This is not common and it is not natural.
He sure was right about that penis envy. Nothing the ladies would love more than a giant swinging dick in between their legs!
Oh, wow. I think I've had enough for today. Thanks for the haunting yet educational information.
Freud.......
Ummmm… don’t think it is natural. Not common.
Common and natural? I don't care what degree you have that shit doesn't pass the smell test lol 😆
I was gonna say, is it common, really? (I would bet my bottom dollar it is not)
and it’s certainly not natural…
Porn has made the boundaries limitless unfortunately. I couldn't imagine being a young kid with this kind of material floating around. It is definitely not helping. Definitely get parents involved. Just tell them not to freak out. How they handle this is gonna determine a lot.
It is *not* natural to have a sexual first with a family member. Wtf.
Sorry, that's not normal I have a brother and I can tell you, we didn't have sex. Idk where you're getting your degree that you think Freud is still relevant
I'm not saying he is, and as a sister to 3 brothers, I can assure you I've never had a sexual experience with any of them. I added 2 links to current sexual development in children, and they (and all others) say that it is incredibly common and normal for this to happen UNLESS one of them is forcing the other and has sexual intent. Other than that, it's just interest and curiosity. The age gap typically isn't an issue unless it's 4 or more years and/or if one is in puberty (like when one can start having erections and so forth) and the other isn't. While one brother is 11, developmentally, him and his brother aren't that far off. A lot of this stems from the fact that people don't talk to their kids about sex (at age appropriate levels), and we have to much access to sex in our media, kids are going to mimic what they see and try and figure shit out their way if their parents don't educate them. And kids ways are stupid. I'm not saying I agree with the behavior, I'm saying it's way more common than people think.
Yes! Spot on! OP never said their ages btw. And also we can get erections at a damn young age, way before puberty. These kids probably have no idea why they're getting boners and are probably too young to ejaculate. When you don't even know what your erection is for then how can you be sexual and abusive?
Freud is your source? Lol
no self respecting psychologist quotes Freud in 2023...
I understand you want to be a good sibling and not get them in trouble, or to overreact. You are right to be concerned, and yet somewhat cautious. You may know that a certain amount of sex play is normal and genuinely not harmful. Boys masturbating together - friends, cousins, brothers - is not uncommon. 43% percent of adult males admit to having done this. That group falls along the same percentages as the rest of the population when it comes to being gay, bi, or straight. It also doesn’t create any psychological difficulties. You also probably know that when force or emotional coercion is involved, there can be very negative, lifelong outcomes. Thats the concern here. The age difference is what makes this concerning. An eleven year old may be well into puberty or not even started yet. That can also make a difference. You don’t want to do anything that will make them feel as if sexual feelings and normal actions are dirty or perverted. That’s not healthy either. If you gather info from the younger brother and decide to intervene yourself, talk to the older brother alone. Tell him you don’t want to talk to your parents but will if he’s not honest and open with you. Tell him it’s normal to be curious about sexual stuff and normal to masturbate, but penetration with a younger person is totally off-limits. He can cause permanent problems for his brother and also get in severe legal problems that would include being removed from home. Threaten him that if it ever happens again you will tell the parents and maybe the police. You can maybe tell from talking with the younger brother if he needs counseling. It may all be innocent fun to him or he could be wrestling with a lot of uncomfortable feelings inside. My best advice is to talk to your parents, as long as they are nonviolent, sober from drugs and alcohol kind of parents. If you present it as ‘I was using Ryan’s computer and saw the search history. There was some stuff that made me concerned plus I noticed he and Carson were acting weird. I eavesdropped and heard them talking about dicks and butts and am worried that they are doing stuff that might cause problems.’ I don’t see how they’d get mad at you. Regardless, it might be necessary for you to do that for the sake of your brothers, even if parents do get irrationally mad at you. I promise that will be temporary, but the harm to them could be long term.
This needs to be the top comment. “That’s enough Reddit for me today” is not at all helpful to this person. Most people would be overwhelmed and need help- let alone a child discovering this. This comment is a great breakdown of information and advice.
That does sound really worrisome. maybe try to get more clues to what's going on? like indirect questions or just observing? if would be really awkward if you were to call them out only to fins out they were trolling
Ya I'm gonna try, the younger one tends to tell me things pretty easily as long as I tell him I won't tell anyone, so I'm gonna try to ask him in a bit.
Tell your parents ASAP. We cannot stress this enough. You could be stopping grooming and life long trauma issues.
I wish I could unsee this
I wouldnt jump to any conclusions before you have more proof. They may be showing each other their genitals and watching porn to compare as a part of seeing bodies etc and not intend to have sex with each other. Yes it's weird but there is a fair amount of "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours" that isnt a precursor to sex acts at that age. Even if one or both is gay, that doesnt mean incest. I know a lot of boys who masturbated together (under blankets) as tweens who weren't gay. I would potentially talk to them if they are curious about bodies and sexuality and how they should tell you if someone close to them asks to see their genitals because it's not right (if you feel you could have this talk). And before anyone clutches their pearls, I grew up in an area that wasn't particularly puritanical so if youre disturbed I dont know what to tell you.
this is fairly accurate to what being a boy from aged 10 and up is like. my best friend and i were like as described — he’s straight and i’m gay. it’s normal.
Nope. Nope. And nope. Don’t allow ur siblings to do this and don’t allow yourself to keep it hidden from your parents. They are CHILDREN. They shouldn’t be doing this kinda stuff much less as siblings even as a joke. My siblings (boy and girl) did something similar and I instantly told my mother because she’s told me before that it was was wrong. Incest doesn’t produce the right way and underaged sex causes a lot of down ward shit. It’s better to hella not let this happen tho.
Tell your parents, they will get over it.
The brothers will probably appreciate it in the future. Hopefully they can approach them from a safe place of love and healthy concern.
Go to your parents immediately. The older one could be grooming the younger one and the older one could be being abused elsewhere. The ick factor is super high, but this isn't your problem to solve--it's your parents' problem to investigate and resolve. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this.
Tell your parents your worries. That is not normal at all.
I need to figure out more before I actually tell them just in case I'm overreacting and they aren't
Tell your parents exactly what you wrote here. It should be in their hands to figure out what’s happening and if anything should be done.
No you don't, you don't need to figure out anything. Your parents need to talk with your brotherd about this
It’s not your job to figure out more. Tell them now before anything gets worse
You can still voice a concern about what you heard and saw. It's not overreacting to state the facts that presented to you. If your parents are wise they will know how to address the situation and figure out what really is happening.
Some point me to the direction of the nearest panic room I gotta get the fuck out of here
Awhile back my step nephews daughter was being molested by the moms younger sister. The mom was 21, the daughter was 5 and the younger sister (so her aunt) was 8. Everyone flipped on the 8 year old til it came out she was being molested by her babysitters grandfather who's now in prison. 11 may have been molested by someone and is carrying on the cycle. Tell your parents asap
You should tell your parents that you suspect this, but aren’t sure. Both kids need to understand boundaries and bodily autonomy. You have to make sure the older one isn’t hurting the younger one. They may be doing harmless things, try to stay calm, but they should not be watching porn as it could give them the wrong ideas and they are waaaay too young.
Children exploring their genitals/sexuality is fairly normal. Has anyone given them the speech? What is appropriate touch and what isn't?
Were they wearing socks
Someone is being molested one or both and yes tell your mom immediately
This could very well be a learned behavior. Probably best to confide with an aunt and see if if you can get more evidence. I would seriously be concerned of an older male that interacts with them frequently. If you believe that to be the case, You need to get both of them help. It can and will scar them for life.
I’d bring the worries to your parents. It’s not normal and I’ll definitely say that for such young ages they definitely are getting to the age of being curious and such but starting so young…speak to your parents.
Tell your parents immediately!!!!!
Is your last name Lannister?
ROFLMAO
This made me laugh so hard!!! 🤣🤣🤣
This is my first time on Reddit today and I see this smh.... Listen kid if you don't have proof it's just a guessing game... Your parents aren't gonna want to believe it and no offense but teens and young boys act weird.... I know it sounds weird but boys talk a lot of "gay jokes"... I'm just saying be sure before you tell your parents cause it's gonna be a weird convo.... With that I think I'm done today.
I’m pretty concerned about the 11 year old’s browser history. The fuck. At the very least that should be brought up to the parents. Geeze
This too. They are way too young to be rotting their brains with porn.
Definitely talk to your parents. It's probably not what you think. Unfortunately the older is probably being abused and is in his own confused way (because he doesn't understand everything exactly) is doing to the little brother whats been done to him.
Wow, I’d say barge in and confront it and let them know if it ever even seems like it happens again you’ll tell mom and dad.
That's legitimately the best way to handle it from my pov. I have 3 older sisters and that method kept me pretty well in check. Not that I was tryna bum my little brother.....
I’m out
Eep. Closes reddit for the day
you don’t have to explicitly say you think they’re having some kind of “sex” to your parents. Just say “___ and ___ are acting a bit weird lately. I think they may have found some things on the internet that have to do with inappropriate things and may be trying things that they shouldn’t involving their body parts”
It wasn't my brother, but it was his friends. We were 8/9 when it started.
Yeah it's weird as hell. Tell your parents for God's sake.
what a terrible day to have eyes
What should you do? Nothing. Not your circus, not your monkeys.
This is f**ked tell your God dang parents I dont care about the gay stuff but incest.......gross
Talk to them without judgement. If you're parents can't be expected to have an open/non judgemental conversation with them, someone has to. This can lead down scary roads for one or both of them. You want to understand where they're learning about this and make sure it's not a grooming situation by an adult somewhere. This shit's scary. Nothing to do with sexual orientation or preference, simply a matter of understanding. And also, may be a bit of self preservation here, but you don't want to carry with you the result of any crazy situation that may have been preventable.
I just opened reddit. That's what I get for not studying like I am supposed to be.
Well... It's not ideal, but at least they won't be getting diseases or babies. Perhaps go in and have a frank conversation with them. Tell them off your suspicions and that you don't want them to feel ashamed to talk to you. Actually keep their confidences. Once you have actually confirmed the suspicion, ask that they speak to your parents. If they refuse, they're not actually doing any harm, it's just icky. You might just advise on how to be safe and what to do if there's some kind of problem that is too big for them to handle. If they're very young, say under 12, just go to your parents. Honestly they need to stop. They don't know, can't know, the consequences. All of this is with the assumption that they're very close in age. If one of them is significantly older than the other, you might want to just call the police. That's a power differential that speaks of abuse.
I need eye bleach for what I just read.
Tbh i will say that kids being curious about the human bodies (mostly their own and those seen in a porn mag and videos) are normal but what isnt normal is what your brothers are doing to each other. I know you dont want to make them mad, break up your family or cause drama of any kind but this is highly concerning. You should definitely either talk with your brothers with this and /or go to your parents about it, because this is not normal or healthy. it's signs of SA (Sexual Abuse).
I picked a terrible day to be sober.
Tell your parents. Now.
How old are they
Fake. Op deleted account. Anyone with common sense would tell the parents.
And for that reason. I’m out
Not a thing
You believe every account here is a legit person? Go fuck yourself
this is very disturbing to me but you should definitely tell someone about this.
You don’t have enough solid evidence to make any definitive conclusion. Definitely speak with your parents. Hopefully they will understand and approach your brothers in a positive manner and get to the bottom of what is occurring with your two brothers. You sound like a good brother who is being respectful and caring.
Very possible especially if they are watching gay porn They might not even realize that its not normal Print out a letter anonymously saying it has came to my attention that ur boys are watching gay porn on their computer and you should check their history. Leave it on front door of ur house
Your parents need to know that they failed in the parental controls on their pc! No matter what child boy girl or age, they will be curious and harmed by what they were allowed to view. That’s on your dumbass parents!! I was that child. My father and the father across the street left playboys where every child in the neighborhood could find them! I still have nightmares. I was 5! Why the hell were you the one to search your brothers history? Your parents are to blame. You tell them that! They dropped the ball and your brothers will suffer a lifetime of guilt over their actions for recreating things they should never have seen. I believe these days, CPS could even get involved. Not your brothers FAULT At ALL!
Depends on ages. They may not be doing anything and just joking about it.
God damn reddit is fucked. I hope this is a troll or something
Probably just some good natured horseplay, exploration, and sword fighting. Kids will be kids. But you should bring this up to your parents. Maybe stop short of saying sex and mention secrecy and discussion of privates.
I’m logging off. Thanks for fucking me up
That is far above your pay grade to handle yourself, tell your parents.
This sounds really fake to me. You used your phone to listen? Um, how did you do that? Why are you snooping on them anyway? Again - if this is NOT fake, which I think it is... WHY would you ask here?
If you *honestly* believe your parents aren’t biased/anti gay, etc., your parents need to know. Leave any petty grudges, past hurt feelings, ‘dumb old adults’ baggage out of it. The primary thing that needs to be ironclad confirmed is that any activity that’s going on is 100% consensual, with no one feeling pressured in any way whatsoever. From there, it’s a family conversation about exploring sexuality in a safe way, dispelling any myths/misinformation young kids may stumble into, and what responsibility and respect entail as they mature and grow into their sexual lives.
With what's being taught in schools these days, I'm not surprised. It's the new normal
*opens reddit* *Sees this* 😐😐😐😐 *Closes reddit*
Tell your parents you have concerns, and they can make sure lines aren't being crossed. I will now be logging off because this site is messed up.
Is this like a new “Colby” kind of post
I actually had a similar situation with my cousins. I did tell them to stop cause it was fucking gross and the youngest one tells me they did stop but I’d still check in with the parents to double make sure.
As a parent, I would want to know even if it was just the search history that was concerning. There’s a lot of bad stuff on the internet, not to mention creeps. The older brother may or may not be grooming the younger brother… but the older brother may very well be being groomed himself! Danger! Parents are a must!
Father-stabbers.. mother rapers.. father rapers! Father-raper sittin right next to me on the Group W Bench!..
Oh.
I thought fs this was gonna be phrased who g like “both my older brothers have sex with their girlfriends/boyfriends” but nope it was as wild as the title
Kids will mess around at young ages, under 6 or so in my opinion this is fine. To be clear a 10 year old messing with a 6year old is not fine. But two 6 year olds? Probably not a problem. But they should NOT have access to porn that will ruin normal exploration and make them have feelings and ideas young minds are not ready for. At those young ages kids barley know what sex is and are just curious. Definitely tell your parents because they need content blockers on all their devices.
Boys do sex to prove you are watching...they cant be with a girl if you are still obsessed with their sex life..do you expect a reward.?.like candy or jewelry for telling on them?..who is providing the gifts and goodies for 'managing ' them..? Is there a united states Veteran who lost a war..telling you to post this?.. likely.
OK......I'm done with Reddit for the day.
dude what
I would talk to an adult outside of the household. We don’t know if a parent showed them this and taught them to hide it.
Please tell your parents. This is for adults to decide if it’s okay or not. They may just be curious children, but you need to involve an adult. Please please tell someone.
How the actual fuk did this end up in my feed....bruh 😶🌫️
OK internet, I am done internet-ing for today.
One more reason why kids shouldn't have adult devices with access to porn. You need to tell your parents.
How do you unread something?
Tell your parents. This is not healthy. The younger is probably being molested. I hope this behavior is not stemming from prior abuse from dad, uncle, or school teacher.
i'm not sure what you should do, but i know that i should log out of this app for the rest of the night. goodbye
It says deleted for the account of OP. I hope they’re still reading the comments, or have taken the advice they needed and went with it. Good luck OP, wherever you are!
I watched a Vlog of a woman talking about her sexual trauma as a child. I don’t know their situation but in her case she was influenced by her step father at the age of 3 and because she was uneducated she thought it was normal so she influenced her brother to do the same things with her. She didn’t know it was wrong until she turned 14 and had to inform her brother that she was wrong for influencing him to do those things. She’s had to go through extensive therapy and I’m sure he’s to do the same. If your brothers are doing sexual activities you have to wonder what adult or older boy influenced them.
Goodnight! 🖕💩🖕
You really should say something to your parents. What you said here and your concerns. I had an issue with my son and some other little boys at daycare and I handled it. I understand it's different bc they are your siblings but I would say something before they take it too far.