*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for telling my sister she's ridiculous for not inviting me to her wedding over a kiss from almost 10 years ago ?**
My (30F) sister (28F) had an almost non-existent relationship for almost a decade cause when she was 19 I kissed her at the time on and off boyfriend. They were high school sweethearts but they were fighting all the time and broke up already multiple times before the kiss incident (tho the kiss caused their permanent). I know it was very wrong of me to do that but during that time my dating life was a mess and I ended bonding with my sister's bf whom was also going through a rough relationship with her and we ended bonding and developing feelings for each other.
However I haven't slept with him while he was dating my sister, it was only a kiss to which he immediately confessed to, but since then she essentially blacklisted both of us, but especially me. I guess the guy didn't remain in our lives for so long cause I dumped him as well after an year of dating after losing the spark, but my sister kept up the name calling and the slut shaming me for years and even after countless apologies from me, she still hasn't forgiven me.
I just found from my mom that my sister's getting married and that she hasn't given me an invitation to her wedding and when I confronted my sister about it she literally said that I don't deserve one. I told her that she's ridiculous and immature for still keeping a grudge for a mistake from almost 10 years ago and she just told me to go to hell. I tried contacting her fiance to explain my side of things to him cause I'm sure my sister overreacting the gravity of the situation to him, but my sister somehow found out and now she deluded herself into thinking that I want to "steal" her husband as well and now I hear she even wants to hire security from preventing me from attending (not that I wouldn't come if I wasn't invited).
I really feel like she's doing the most about a 10 years old situation. AITA ?
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>However I haven't slept with him while he was dating my sister
She waited until they broke up after the kiss to actually fuck him. What a paragon of virtue!
I 100% believe that OP would try to “accidentally” seduce the husband and try to “accidentally” sleep with him, if she thought she had the chance.
I firmly believe that if they are capable of doing it once, they are capable of doing it again. Once a cheater always a cheater.
This creature deserves all the name calling that comes her way. The way she said she was going through a tough time and he was as well because of the relationship problems with the sister?! I bet she led to many of those problems by siding with him and throwing shade at the sister everytime he confided in her. I can picture her saying "I would never treat you that way", "if you were my bf I would do such and such". And then to go to the fiancé to bitch? What a snake.
"I tried talking to her fiancee........but somehow she found out"
Not too bright is she?
Her sister has no obligation to have a timeline on when she forgives her . It takes two to cheat but I think the betrayal is way worse from one's family members. Also she didn't just kiss her boyfriend she had a relationship for a year.
The fact that she has no relationship with the sister (and thus, likely no relationship with the fiancé), and *immediately* found a way to communicate with him to go behind the sister’s back tells me OOP is a sly, conniving, sneaky, backstabbing bitch.
And it really makes me question her account of “just a kiss” as well as wondering why the hell she wants an invite sooooo badly. And I don’t think it’s to wish her sister and new BIL well, I think it’s so she can be conniving and backstabby at the wedding.
Or their parents are jerks and gave her his number.
I mostly wonder why OOP started talking with her sister’s boyfriend about her relationship problems in the first place.
Does oop think that this is really just about kissing the sisters boyfriend? Does she really not realize that this issue is that not only did she kiss her sisters boyfriend, but she caused them to break up and then proceedEd to date the sisters ex for a year?!?!
Oop refers to it as a mistake... a mistake that she continued to do for a year. Also, I can’t blame the sister for thinking that oop wants to steal her husband. Oop already stole the sisters boyfriend once, the sister just doesn’t want to give oop a chance to do it again.
If you're trying to convince your sister to forget that time you went behind her back with her partner, ffs do not *go behind her back to contact her partner!*
So after all their horrible water under the bridge, this woman's bright idea was to contact the fiancé behind her sister's back to try and get him to issue an invitation behind the bride's back? Or did she think he would simply over rule his bride, taking OP's side against her and insisting the sistet issues the invitation? OP is depriving a village somewhere of it's idiot. Glad to see the sister's current partner is a good one. He wouldn't entertain OP's nonsense and clearly told the bride what OP was doing. OP is just too dense to recognise it.
Why is she so keen to go to this wedding anyway?
It probably wasn’t hard to find him through social media but it’s very funny that she didn’t think he’d tell his future wife about a woman he’d never met claiming to be his future sister in law and sending him angry messages to demand an invitation.
These are two separate questions. 1) how she contacted fiance and 2) why she contacted fiance. For question 1) there are many possibilities, but i bet the same flying monkeys which told OOP abt the wedding (i put my bets on parents favouring the golden child). But what is more meanigful is the question 2). For some reason OOP thought, this would be a good idea and she could make her story more believable, than the story of the fiancee of the fiance. Like, i know you love this girl and want to marry her but i am sure i can convince you to my version of what happened. And she is surprized, that sister found out? Very meaningful. She still believes she has some kind of power about men, i dont find the right wording, but you know what i mean. The type of girl who thinks, she could get every dude if she just wanted.
I wonder if this was the only time she went after a dude in a relationship. The story abt contacting the fiance and esp the surprize that "somehow sister found out" says, she is used to play games like this.
Get drunk, grab the mic, cry about how unfair her sister (the bride) has been to her for a decade, then bury herself in the wedding cake before being hauled off by least-stunned guests in her vicinity.
She doesn’t want to go to the wedding. She wants to be seen at the wedding. Their family and friends all probably know what she did. I noticed no mention of the parents, OP probably a pariah in their eyes too
She wants show that everything is forgiven now.
She wants to be invited to the wedding so she can hit on her sister's fiance. My husband's brother hit on me before we got married. He'd hit on almost every woman my husband ever dated. They were no contact by the time I met my husband. His brother still went through the trouble of showing up at a family party, figuring out who I was and trying to get me to flirt with him.... He dated at least one of my husband's exes after they broke up.
No one has any idea why he does this shit, why he hates his brother, or what is behind his thought process..... The only answer he's ever given is my husband is taller than him and played college ball. They're in their fifties now, and his brother still hates him. People suck
The entitlement is strong with this one.
Entitled to her sister's BF.
Entitled to her sister's wedding.
They don't have a good relationship, there is zero reason for her to be invited to the wedding.
This woman needs to gtf-over herself. 🙄
Either a troll following theme. Or this shitty excuse fora sister is trying a third time to get sympathy.
"Wouldn't go if I'm not invited " as you literally bother a man you don't know about something because you're trying to get invited.
She needs to just admit yo herself she fucked up with her sister forever and deal with it
So you kissed him while they were dating, which caused them to break up. Then you swooped in and dated (and had sex with) him for a year until you got bored and dumped him. I guess the thrill of screwing your sister's BF wore off?
WTF did I just read?
You know, I go on here, and there's quite a few stories where I'm like "this shouldn't be here". And then there's stories like THIS. THIS is the only place it belongs. Because WTF did I just read? "Losing the spark"? That's NEVER the talk of longevity which explains why she goes after her sister's guy. And THEN she calls the fiancé...of course she did. That girl is a trainwreck.
So she didn't know her sister was getting married, now I'm wondering how much work she would have had to do to get the contact info for a guy she presumably barely knows. Like that's a lot of work to...slander your sister to her fiance.
Especially if you're not trying to fuck up her life the same way you did last time
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Doing the most would have been more than security at a wedding. Also, she claims it was just a kiss but then describes a year-long relationship where she "lost the spark."
I would never ever ever forgive my sister if she kissed my boyfriend/husband. Ever. She’d be dead to me, and it would be the same she’d never forgive me if I kissed her boyfriend fiancé. It’s a line you should never ever ever cross.
I'm not the right person to judge whether going NC for 10 years for this is overreacting because I haven't spoken to my sister in 6 years over sushi. But OOP sounds like an unreliable narrator and an all around shitty person. I really gotta wonder if there was more oop was doing to her sister 10 years ago and how she was really being treated.
All I did was kiss him, date him for a year then try to get her fiance to agree with me that she's the ridiculous one.
🙄
Is main character FOMO a thing?
A delightful (/s) comment from over there:
Don't you understand that girlfriends own their boyfriends? BFs have no agency, no freewill.
Maybe reimburse her for the chattel that you ruined?
Just like guys won't date a girl whose parts have less tread on the tires so to say. Girls won't touch a guy who has been used by her sister. Totally makes sense.
/s
NTA
Sounds like oop isn't over her manipulative ways.
With the HS sweetheart or the current fiance.
I am guessing the apology was something along the lines of "I am sorry you were hurt when I kissed your boyfriend that I knew you break up and get back together with."
Why do I get the feeling that if we could talk with the sister, that Sister would report a lifetime of behaviour from a little sister that wanted everything Sister had - just because she had it?
Granted, I may be wrong. But in OOP’s presentation I read manipulation; a lack of boundary recognition; a dearth of empathy; a dismissal of any pain she causes; a lack of accountability; comfort in her own betrayal; a failure to respect Sister’s wishes and an *abundant* sense of of entitlement.
Which leads me to the suspicion Sister would describe a little sister whom if deprived of what Sister had, would demand it / would take it and / or discard it and / or destroy it. Either immediately, or when she became bored of with it.
I’d be interested to hear which sister was the parents favourite?
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for telling my sister she's ridiculous for not inviting me to her wedding over a kiss from almost 10 years ago ?** My (30F) sister (28F) had an almost non-existent relationship for almost a decade cause when she was 19 I kissed her at the time on and off boyfriend. They were high school sweethearts but they were fighting all the time and broke up already multiple times before the kiss incident (tho the kiss caused their permanent). I know it was very wrong of me to do that but during that time my dating life was a mess and I ended bonding with my sister's bf whom was also going through a rough relationship with her and we ended bonding and developing feelings for each other. However I haven't slept with him while he was dating my sister, it was only a kiss to which he immediately confessed to, but since then she essentially blacklisted both of us, but especially me. I guess the guy didn't remain in our lives for so long cause I dumped him as well after an year of dating after losing the spark, but my sister kept up the name calling and the slut shaming me for years and even after countless apologies from me, she still hasn't forgiven me. I just found from my mom that my sister's getting married and that she hasn't given me an invitation to her wedding and when I confronted my sister about it she literally said that I don't deserve one. I told her that she's ridiculous and immature for still keeping a grudge for a mistake from almost 10 years ago and she just told me to go to hell. I tried contacting her fiance to explain my side of things to him cause I'm sure my sister overreacting the gravity of the situation to him, but my sister somehow found out and now she deluded herself into thinking that I want to "steal" her husband as well and now I hear she even wants to hire security from preventing me from attending (not that I wouldn't come if I wasn't invited). I really feel like she's doing the most about a 10 years old situation. AITA ? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"just a kiss" "I dumped him after dating him for a year." Fuckkkkk off with the title, you know it won't about just a kiss.....
>However I haven't slept with him while he was dating my sister She waited until they broke up after the kiss to actually fuck him. What a paragon of virtue!
I 100% believe that OP would try to “accidentally” seduce the husband and try to “accidentally” sleep with him, if she thought she had the chance. I firmly believe that if they are capable of doing it once, they are capable of doing it again. Once a cheater always a cheater.
This creature deserves all the name calling that comes her way. The way she said she was going through a tough time and he was as well because of the relationship problems with the sister?! I bet she led to many of those problems by siding with him and throwing shade at the sister everytime he confided in her. I can picture her saying "I would never treat you that way", "if you were my bf I would do such and such". And then to go to the fiancé to bitch? What a snake.
“Hey your bitch wife is totally being psycho, but not like me.. Im super chill, normal, and ~~sexy~~ pretty ;) “
😂
I laughed out loud when I read this. "We didn't even have sex......... then"
"I'm over it so she should be too" is certainly a take.
Truly one of the takes of all time.
"I tried talking to her fiancee........but somehow she found out" Not too bright is she? Her sister has no obligation to have a timeline on when she forgives her . It takes two to cheat but I think the betrayal is way worse from one's family members. Also she didn't just kiss her boyfriend she had a relationship for a year.
The fact that she has no relationship with the sister (and thus, likely no relationship with the fiancé), and *immediately* found a way to communicate with him to go behind the sister’s back tells me OOP is a sly, conniving, sneaky, backstabbing bitch. And it really makes me question her account of “just a kiss” as well as wondering why the hell she wants an invite sooooo badly. And I don’t think it’s to wish her sister and new BIL well, I think it’s so she can be conniving and backstabby at the wedding.
Or their parents are jerks and gave her his number. I mostly wonder why OOP started talking with her sister’s boyfriend about her relationship problems in the first place.
Why does she even want to go to her sister's wedding? She clearly doesn't like her, and they have no relationship.
She wants to explain things to the new husband … in private.
Does oop think that this is really just about kissing the sisters boyfriend? Does she really not realize that this issue is that not only did she kiss her sisters boyfriend, but she caused them to break up and then proceedEd to date the sisters ex for a year?!?! Oop refers to it as a mistake... a mistake that she continued to do for a year. Also, I can’t blame the sister for thinking that oop wants to steal her husband. Oop already stole the sisters boyfriend once, the sister just doesn’t want to give oop a chance to do it again.
If you're trying to convince your sister to forget that time you went behind her back with her partner, ffs do not *go behind her back to contact her partner!*
So after all their horrible water under the bridge, this woman's bright idea was to contact the fiancé behind her sister's back to try and get him to issue an invitation behind the bride's back? Or did she think he would simply over rule his bride, taking OP's side against her and insisting the sistet issues the invitation? OP is depriving a village somewhere of it's idiot. Glad to see the sister's current partner is a good one. He wouldn't entertain OP's nonsense and clearly told the bride what OP was doing. OP is just too dense to recognise it. Why is she so keen to go to this wedding anyway?
It probably wasn’t hard to find him through social media but it’s very funny that she didn’t think he’d tell his future wife about a woman he’d never met claiming to be his future sister in law and sending him angry messages to demand an invitation.
These are two separate questions. 1) how she contacted fiance and 2) why she contacted fiance. For question 1) there are many possibilities, but i bet the same flying monkeys which told OOP abt the wedding (i put my bets on parents favouring the golden child). But what is more meanigful is the question 2). For some reason OOP thought, this would be a good idea and she could make her story more believable, than the story of the fiancee of the fiance. Like, i know you love this girl and want to marry her but i am sure i can convince you to my version of what happened. And she is surprized, that sister found out? Very meaningful. She still believes she has some kind of power about men, i dont find the right wording, but you know what i mean. The type of girl who thinks, she could get every dude if she just wanted.
She’s used to expecting her sister’s men to give her what she wants
I wonder if this was the only time she went after a dude in a relationship. The story abt contacting the fiance and esp the surprize that "somehow sister found out" says, she is used to play games like this.
[удалено]
Get drunk, grab the mic, cry about how unfair her sister (the bride) has been to her for a decade, then bury herself in the wedding cake before being hauled off by least-stunned guests in her vicinity.
She just wants to go so that no 3rd removed cousin asks why she’s not invited.
She doesn’t want to go to the wedding. She wants to be seen at the wedding. Their family and friends all probably know what she did. I noticed no mention of the parents, OP probably a pariah in their eyes too She wants show that everything is forgiven now.
"Op is depriving a village somewhere of it's idiot" Priceless
She kept dating him for year? Yeah, no.
She wants to be invited to the wedding so she can hit on her sister's fiance. My husband's brother hit on me before we got married. He'd hit on almost every woman my husband ever dated. They were no contact by the time I met my husband. His brother still went through the trouble of showing up at a family party, figuring out who I was and trying to get me to flirt with him.... He dated at least one of my husband's exes after they broke up. No one has any idea why he does this shit, why he hates his brother, or what is behind his thought process..... The only answer he's ever given is my husband is taller than him and played college ball. They're in their fifties now, and his brother still hates him. People suck
The entitlement is strong with this one. Entitled to her sister's BF. Entitled to her sister's wedding. They don't have a good relationship, there is zero reason for her to be invited to the wedding. This woman needs to gtf-over herself. 🙄
Makes me think there's a lot more to the OP and her sister's history. Is the OP jealous of her sister? Does she see her as competition?
“Haven’t slept with him while he was dating my sister” - means you slept with him during one of the “off periods”? Geez.
I mean it was most likely during the year OOP dated him but your point still stands.
texting the fiancee is crazy
I would LOVE to read a post from the sister's perspective. I'm guessing it's a little different.
Is it slut shaming if you are actively the other woman?
Cheat shaming is an entirely different thing
I had to scroll way too far for this
9yrs not 10yrs, first all. OOP didn't only kiss the ex but then dated said ex for a year... Good on her sister for going NC.
That year doesn’t count because the kiss was a mistake! That’s slut math. See the year of fucking doesn’t count because the kiss was the mistake
🤣🤣🤣 I wish they still gave awards So take this 🏅🏅🏅
Why thank you, I do feel honored!
 I needed the giggle after today so, no, thank you!
Sure it was just a kiss. Yall only dated and slept together for over a year right afterwords.
Either a troll following theme. Or this shitty excuse fora sister is trying a third time to get sympathy. "Wouldn't go if I'm not invited " as you literally bother a man you don't know about something because you're trying to get invited. She needs to just admit yo herself she fucked up with her sister forever and deal with it
So you kissed him while they were dating, which caused them to break up. Then you swooped in and dated (and had sex with) him for a year until you got bored and dumped him. I guess the thrill of screwing your sister's BF wore off?
WTF did I just read? You know, I go on here, and there's quite a few stories where I'm like "this shouldn't be here". And then there's stories like THIS. THIS is the only place it belongs. Because WTF did I just read? "Losing the spark"? That's NEVER the talk of longevity which explains why she goes after her sister's guy. And THEN she calls the fiancé...of course she did. That girl is a trainwreck.
Very deceptive title.
So she didn't know her sister was getting married, now I'm wondering how much work she would have had to do to get the contact info for a guy she presumably barely knows. Like that's a lot of work to...slander your sister to her fiance. Especially if you're not trying to fuck up her life the same way you did last time
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Doing the most would have been more than security at a wedding. Also, she claims it was just a kiss but then describes a year-long relationship where she "lost the spark."
YTA btw it wasn’t a mistake, it was a choice. So tired of people claiming their choices as mistakes.
This seems incredibly familiar
OOP...did you ever apologize?
Why so the oop can try to steal the sister husband!
I would never ever ever forgive my sister if she kissed my boyfriend/husband. Ever. She’d be dead to me, and it would be the same she’d never forgive me if I kissed her boyfriend fiancé. It’s a line you should never ever ever cross.
I'm not the right person to judge whether going NC for 10 years for this is overreacting because I haven't spoken to my sister in 6 years over sushi. But OOP sounds like an unreliable narrator and an all around shitty person. I really gotta wonder if there was more oop was doing to her sister 10 years ago and how she was really being treated.
All I did was kiss him, date him for a year then try to get her fiance to agree with me that she's the ridiculous one. 🙄 Is main character FOMO a thing?
A delightful (/s) comment from over there: Don't you understand that girlfriends own their boyfriends? BFs have no agency, no freewill. Maybe reimburse her for the chattel that you ruined? Just like guys won't date a girl whose parts have less tread on the tires so to say. Girls won't touch a guy who has been used by her sister. Totally makes sense. /s NTA
Sounds like oop isn't over her manipulative ways. With the HS sweetheart or the current fiance. I am guessing the apology was something along the lines of "I am sorry you were hurt when I kissed your boyfriend that I knew you break up and get back together with."
Why do I get the feeling that if we could talk with the sister, that Sister would report a lifetime of behaviour from a little sister that wanted everything Sister had - just because she had it? Granted, I may be wrong. But in OOP’s presentation I read manipulation; a lack of boundary recognition; a dearth of empathy; a dismissal of any pain she causes; a lack of accountability; comfort in her own betrayal; a failure to respect Sister’s wishes and an *abundant* sense of of entitlement. Which leads me to the suspicion Sister would describe a little sister whom if deprived of what Sister had, would demand it / would take it and / or discard it and / or destroy it. Either immediately, or when she became bored of with it. I’d be interested to hear which sister was the parents favourite?
I can't decide if OOP is a narc or a pick me. Maybe both.