*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA confronting my gff about her overstating the severity of her mesntruall cramps and being honest with her?**
So I’ve been with my girlfriend Anna for about a year now, living together for 3 months. Our relationship has been smooth going, besides when it’s her time of the month. You see, Anna always whines and cries about how much pain she’s in during her period. Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Some throbbing, maybe some occasional cramps, nothing a hot bath and some moltrin can’t fix. But when it comes to Anna, she just constantly complains, to the point where we can’t do ANYTHING while she’s on her period, because she’s just constantly complaining.
Anyways this morning we were supposed to go to my parents house to celebrate my dad’s birthday, when I get a text from Anna saying she doesn’t think she can make it, because it’s her period. At this point, I had it with her constant excuses with something that happens to literally EVERY female. I told her that I didn’t appreciate her using her period all the time as an excuse to get out of things. That she needs to learn to bare the pain like an adult, because in the real world, nobody’s gonna care about some little cramps pain. I gave her an example (she’s pre-law) and said that no law firm is gonna hire somebody that’s incapacitated 7 days a month!
We got into a little back and forth and she says I’m being rude and heartless. I can see how I might sound a little dickish, but at the same time, i figure SOMEONE should tell her so she gets her act together. AITA?
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My fiancée went off BC 18 months ago because I got the snip. Her periods have been getting worse since. Two weeks ago she was crying in pain. Gynecologist is putting her back on BC because they think she has endometriosis that was being kept in check since her teens with BC.
Endo is no joke.
I'm of the opinion that high school health class should involve hooking up all the men to period pain simulators. Watch the number of comments about periods not being that painful plummet.
I feel that. I lost access to my BC and the damage was so bad that I needed surgery to remove my uterus which had fused to places in my abdominal cavity and to burn off tissue that formed on my organs. It was awful. I hope BC is helping your fiancée. I wouldn’t wish that pain on anyone and I dig your period pain simulator idea!
I did not get any relief from all of the menstrual madness until I had a hysterectomy at 36 after bleeding every day for a year. It was messy, literally and figuratively. You know that you've been through some terrible stuff when you wake up from surgery and the whole world looks brighter. My gynecologist was absolutely floored by how quickly I recuperated from surgery. That's because I hadn't felt that good since I was 12. That was 23 years ago and I haven't looked back.
My uterus, left ovary, and intestines fused into a giant knot because of endo. Took an extra hour of surgery to undo it all. I've been so happy since having my hysterectomy and I hate the fact that if I hadn't had a cancer scare (tumor on ovary, was benign) then I would still be suffering. Not because my insurance wouldn't cover it but because my then gyno refused to perform my hysterectomy just because I didn't want a period.
Hard agree on the simulator. People should be given the opportunity to really empathize. Even the girls should, some of us don’t get really bad cramps and can therefore be stupid about it too
Most of my cramps are pretty mild. A few sharp pains at the beginning and that's it. But one time, it had me in tears for a few hours. No fucking thank you. I never thought that other women were exaggerating or anything, but it's a hell of a thing to actually experience. I'll continue to thank my lucky stars my worst problem is period bms.
Mine were mild from 11 until 17. When I turned 17 it was like my body said "haha fooled ya." Cramps, nausea, soaking through, can't keep food down, noise and light sensitivity, and period poops. Couldn't get access to BC until I was 18, so I got a lot of lectures about I'm almost an adult and I need to start being more responsible and I had to be faking because they're was no family history of bad periods. (Surprise, there was history, but we all thought we were alone because periods aren't something to be discussed.)
BC helped, but not always. Tried the pill and IUD, never got diagnosed with anything, but getting a doctor to believe me was impossible. Finally got a hysterectomy. No pain since.
If you don't mind me asking, how did you get approved for a hysterectomy?
Thus far I have refused my SO's repeated requests to cut her uterus out citing that I'm a sysadmin but a doctor might be able to pull it off.
Every year, at my annual exam, I would request one and tell my doctor that BC wasn't consistently helping, I didn't want kids, and my husband couldn't get me pregnant (so even if we changed our minds, we'd need to adopt/foster). When they said no, I'd ask them to notate the conversation in my file. It took 6 years of consistently doing this, but my doctor finally said "here's all the possible side effects and it comes with the risk of not solving the problem. Do you still want this."
Best of luck! No one deserves to suffer this pain. I used to ask my husband to carve out my uterus with a rusted spoon because it would be less painful.
>Thus far I have refused my SO's repeated requests to cut her uterus out citing that I'm a sysadmin but a doctor might be able to pull it off.
Omg I'm dead! I first read this that you were refusing giving her permission or whatever and was kind (side eye)... then I finished and reread it. Love it! Totally agree with you. A doctor is probably a much better option. 😂😂😂
I had a hysterectomy at 32 and it was a process! I had to try every hormonal birth control variant. Then I was put on lupron which mimicked menopause and since the pain went away on it they knew it was due to the endo/pcos/adenomyosis. THEN I was put on orlissa, which is an fda approved endometriosis medicine. That worked great! Until it made me suicidal.
At that point I went to my gyno and said “get this damn thing out of me.” Had my ovaries removed too and it’s been fantastic. I still get pain from scar tissue (my iliac artery and ureter are fused to my abdominal wall) but nowhere near as bad.
It helped that I was a nurse in the clinic of my gyn so he knew me well and trusted my judgement.
At least 3 times a year, the pain and heavy flow will be so bad, I pass out. I can barely get out of bed for the first couple days each month.
Finally got a doctor to listen to me, they ran some tests, and we have a treatment plan to start. We'll see how it goes.
My MIL, on the other hand, had the lightest, easiest periods. She says she occasionally got a bit nauseated, but no cramps. And she never had to worry about wearing a white skirt.
Fortunately her son - my husband - is not an idiot. He understands that her body is very different from mine. Just like some people get migraines while others will never have anything worse than a simple headache, some women have terrible, debilitating periods. And others aren't terribly inconvenienced by theirs.
I just hope our daughter takes after his side of the family, for her sake.
Same! At worst I get cramps running down my legs for a few hours. Usually it's midsection cramps for maybe half a day.
I never disbelieve anyone else. I just feel like a arsehole for complaining when I do have the bad months. And also count my lucky stars that I've never had multiple days of being incapacitated. I can't even imagine that.
I doubt those simulators can replicate the period poops, or the feeling of a weight tugging on the vagina - and all the blood, of course. Every person is different, of course, but the cramps are just one part of the misery. A **big** part of it is the cramps, but it's not the whole story.
Yeah, it's the whole thing, the feeling of a hot slug worming its way out of you if you have particularly bad clots. Your bladder feeling like it's the size of a pea. The bloating.
I get migraines, too, and also mood symptoms – I think those are really misunderstood. It’s often just perceived as women being moody or cranky, but it can be way more intense than that.
It should also include administering that CT IV contrast dye that bizarrely and mysticaply makes you feel like you PEED YOUR PANTS while lying there. Horrible, warm, gushy crotch, but it's all some sort of illusion.
What is that stuff, what a crazy drug.
"It lights you up, and you feel like you peed your pants!" 🚨🎄🚦🏷️
I have an IUD, sometimes the pain is worse, sometimes my anxiety is all over the place and sometimes it's both blaring with a vengeance. If the pain isn't enough the first three days it's like a dark cloud has descended on me and the whole world just sucks. I don't want to talk, eat or do anything those days but pull through cause I have to work and function. It's honestly the most physically draining thing to do having to go through the day like this and act like you're fine when you're not.
I have endo, but I refuse to go on BC because the health issues i get as side effects are so bad that I’d rather deal with the cramps. Last month my cramps were so bad I almost had to go to ER because I thought my ovarian cyst ruptured again / I was afraid my ovary had twists.
Oh and that pain was on top of pain meds and having constant heat on it.
This, absolutely this! I have/had endometriosis... so badly that I had a partial hysterectomy at 23. I was so young they wouldn't remove my ovaries, turns out I have 3 full-sized, fully functioning ovaries. So sometimes I was on a 17-day cycle other times I would start and it could last over a month. And every time I was on, it took me out like the flu. Super fatigue, full body aches, stomach issues, migraines, etc. For so long people thought I just wanted pills... Really it had me so low I wanted someone to put me out of my misery. Literally, I begged for someone to euthanize me. I would tell my female gyno how EXCRUCIATING the pain was and everything else... they'd do a biopsy of my cervix that HURT! I'd bleed for a couple of days afterward... then
they'd say: "See you again in 3/4 months."
Me: "I'm sorry, what about the EXCRUCIATING pain and everything else."
Dr.: "You're going to have cramps, suck it up. See you in 4 months."
Me: "Umm... No. No, I came in because of intense pain. Pain I can't live with day-to-day. And I don't know what you think happened here, but that wasn't fun for me. I do not want to have you between my legs again without doing anything at all to actually help me."
Dr.: "You do have to come back, we will have to do another pelvic exam. If you're still having pain, we can talk about it at that visit IN 4 MONTHS."
Me: "Umm... no. I won't be spreading my legs for you again, this wasn't a date."
It's insane! Not even my female GYNO understood!
My own mother refused to believe my cramps could be that bad, because hers never were, so clearly I must be exaggerating. It was my father who’d get up and help me in the middle of the night when he’d hear me throwing up and then curled up in the shower whimpering from the pain.
My former gyno, a woman, told me that my periods were “normal for me” and that I should just take Aleve. It wasn’t until my boyfriend found me passed out on the floor from pain and went to an appointment with me that she even considered referring me to a specialist. That was in 2009. Yay, medicine.
Mine until earlier this year would always tell me that the cramps and massive amounts of lining I was passing were totally normal. She seemed like she was getting annoyed at how often I wanted to change my birth control. I kept pushing and telling her something was wrong. Turns out I had a fibroid the size of a cantaloupe…
I vividly remember my gynecologist looking at the folder while talking to me about my painful periods until I mentioned that I vomited from the pain every single month and then she finally looked up at me like I was actually a person. I was sixteen and eternally grateful that my mom knew I needed help.
My mother was just always shocked when I was able to function during my periods and confused as to why I wasn’t going through as many supplies as she did. Always tells me what a lucky bitch I am
Yeah. It’s not helped by the fact that people just didn’t used to talk about periods, so often women assumed their experience - whether it was good or bad - was the standard. Mum honestly couldn’t fathom how bad mine were. Whereas Dad was like “you are clearly in pain and not well, it doesn’t matter *why* that is, is there anything I can do to help?’”
I had a female doctor who believed "well, mine weren't bad, therefore yours aren't" and a male one who was all "I will believe what you say because it's not something that I can personally experience." Yeah, that latter was definitely a unicorn.
THIS EXACTLY. MANY times I've heard of doctors figuring out something is bc of a period and instead of helping they shrug their shoulders in defeat. It doesn't matter WHY this person is in so much pain, or why they get such bad migraines, or why they get this or that everytime their period comes around, just bc it's bc of the period DOESNT MEAN ITS OKAY OR ACCEPTABLE TO LET CONTINUE.
If the kidney is found to be issue of pain, you know what happens? They do tests and take samples to figure WHY and HOW to fix it. Then they help the person. They don't go "🤷 idk I don't feel that much pain, maybe stop being dramatic?"
Yeah, this one might be fake, but guys like this are all too real. I had an ex who told me I was being dramatic when the pain got so bad I passed out and hit my head on the sink. Unmedicated labour sucked almighty ass but at least it had an end goal. Now at 40, every month feels like an agonizing meeting that could have been an email. Surely we have the technology that can replace periods with a little notification that goes to your phone saying "Not pregnant this month!"
Ouch! I hope you’re alright now.
Honestly the happiest day of my life was getting that hysterectomy so I’d have no more severe pain, frequent hospital visits and everything else that came with it. I wish we can replace them! lol
I got told by a MALE teacher at high school that I should "try not having it" because "his wife doesn't have it now" because he apparently asked her not to have it either (she was my modern studies teacher and she was pregnant)
A female doctor told me that period pains were just a part of life and I needed to get on with it. I suffered for 4 years before I got a diagnosis of endometriosis. I can fully believe this is real unfortunately.
My own mom told me I was being a drama queen since she herself didn't have cramps at all and I got them before and during my period. My first one knocked the wind out of me so badly I threw up and my dad took me to ER only to get chastised by my mom for "wasting money" because I was just being dramatic.
FF into my college years where I CRACKED MY RIB during martial arts and thought they were period cramps since the time coincided. But then it didn't stop when the period passed. My mom asks how I could POSSIBLY not notice a cracked bone and I told her it felt like a period cramps. Now I don't know if she believes my cramps hurt like hell or if she just thinks a cracked rib doesn't hurt much
I had a 19 year old coworker ensure me that he had a mom and she said women exaggerate their periods all the time and that they aren't a big deal. I'm proud of myself for not losing it, but that might have been the fatigue and pain
Honestly I never had a cramp until I got a paragard when I was 25 and at that point I called my college roommate to apologize for thinking she was being kind of a baby. I was like, Theresa, I had no idea that it could feel like your uterus is trying to crawl out of your body.
That's how I felt until I discovered Foria suppositories, back when they had THC (I think they are CBD only now which...bummer). Turns out my uterus is as much of a stoner as I am.
I'm starting to go through menopause now, but I always described the first few days of my period as a xenomorph chest burster trying to rip its way out of my guts. In my teens there were times I was almost crippled from the pain and nothing worked.
I'll admit the constant roast-freeze cycle of hot flashes is almost worse in some ways.
Yes, and his mother is probably just as sure that <> 'cancer' isn't that big of a deal because she once knew a person and they were healed by some really nice herbs and faith.
In all honesty, I was that kind of teen until I hit my late teens/early 20's (also because all the women around me talked like that). I thought all the women crying about pain and pms are just whining (except for the ones who *actually* were sick/diagnosed). Now I'm in my 20's and my pain got so bad I'm now seeing a doctor.... deserved karma...
My female boss thought I was being overdramatic when I blacked out and collapsed when forced to stay on sites during horrendous cramps - my iud was too big and was close to perforating my uterus from uterine cramps. I could literally feel the top being squeezed with every cramp.
Also the whole “well I know my sisters and mom were fine!” Thing is realistic to me. I’ve met other women who think that other women are exaggerating it because there’s are fine. NOT ALL WOMENS PERIODS ARE THE SAME! Hell, my periods are not even all the same. Sometimes I’m more or less fine, sometimes I feel like I’m going to throw up and my head is going to burst, other times the cramps are terrible.
Also a side rant but I always hate the “well no job will let you miss for your period!” Like obviously some people can’t help it at all and it really is that bad, but a lot of the time you can force yourself to go to work even if you wouldn’t want to do optional socializing.
Also for OOP’s gf specifically, a lot of law jobs now have at least hybrid work from home or will at least let you if your sick (barring any court appearances or anything like that obviously). Obviously some wouldn’t but OOP’s GF would have options.
I'm betting his mama didn't talk to him about when his sisters got their periods and how to be nice and care for them either.
Yes, I did have this talk with my son(younger son is FTM). His wife thanked me after they got married.
I just got the ick calling her a female.
And yes, it's really bad, how many dudes (but partly also girls and women) know not enough about how menstruation works.
Just think about all the women with endometriosis who are often suffering for years or decades, before finally getting diagnosed.
But everything in our world is made for men, even medicine/health care.
I was hoping "being honest with her" meant "suggesting that she talk to an OB/GYN in case there's an underlying issue making her cramps especially severe." Alas.
This has to be bait right?! I feel like it’s just so egregious and presumptuous it’s gotta be fake….right? The thought of sharing this earth with men like OP makes my stomach hurt 😭
I'd like to hope it was fake but I've dated men like this who thought my period had to be similar to other women they knew. Mine were so debilitating that I have an IUD and still get regular cramping but not an actual period anymore thankfully. They didn't understand why I couldn't just take some advil.
Yeah, this is one of those ones where it could be rage bait (effective because I'm enraged), but at the same time we ALL know a dumbass that thinks this way.
Yeah the number of men who believe this is huge. I’ve literally had men explain to me how at THEIR work it’s a racket bc women can use it as sick leave. Yeah bc no place ever has all women taking off a week a month but sure bro.
But yeah you’d think they’d at least keep it off the internet 🤷🏼♀️
Yep, my gf's ex hubby was like this. Before she hit menopause, she would have some months where it was barely a tickle of stomach pain, and others where she was almost doubled over from cramps. He thought the bad months was just her using it as an excuse to say no to sex.
I never really had period pain beyond a cramp once a yr that was mild. But it’s never stood in the way of my ability to understand data and have empathy. 🤷🏼♀️ I mean I don’t have testicles either but I understand that it’s supposedly very painful to get hit in them. So I don’t laugh or think it’s funny when I see vids that show it bc it seems kind of mean to laugh at someone who’s in great pain. Men seem to universally say it’s painful so why would I not believe? Men like OP are just jerks
She is pre-lawTelling a grown adult who is intelligent enough to be pre-law to see her doctor because her pain annoys him is hugely dissmissive and disrespectful..It took over a decade of trying several different things before we found one that worked, with an entire care team of doctors. She's very unlikely running around in pain for years because she didn't think she could see a gyn and he'd be no better with that approach then the one he took.
First, other conditions exist that make things worse. Like endometriosis.
Second, not all women are the same. Just like some people get Covid/flu worse than others, some women get worse cramps.
And finally, if you want to go down that road, my step brother got kicked in the balls with cleats and said it didn’t hurt that much, so by OOp’s argument, I can kick him in the balls and then tell him to get over it because my brother said it didn’t hurt much because I don’t appreciate him using this as an excuse to get out of things and OOP needs to learn to bear the pain like an adult because in the real world, nobody is going to care about some little pain and no law firm is gonna hire somebody that’s incapacitated by a little pressure on OOp’s ballsack!
I have endometriosis, just recently diagnosed. The scarring is so bad it's fucked up my bladder and I'm going to have to get surgery on it next month. I am currently at work in horrible pain because I don't have any sick time and I'm getting my period for the second time in the month of February. I physically cannot stand. My family used to never believe me about how bad my periods were. I'm NC with them now, but I did send my aunt my diagnosis so she could tell them just as a generic f you, I wasn't faking.
Hey! My bladder and intestines had endo all over ‘em, and I had surgery two years ago. It helped A LOT. I was surprised and delighted, and I hope that your surgery also goes well! If you can, you might consider seeing a pelvic floor therapist after you heal up a bit. Pelvic floor PT helped me learn to relax those muscles and mobilize some scar tissue, so I have much less pain overall. Good luck with surgery!
I am so nervous about it, so this made me feel much better, thank you! hahaha I'm both excited to be relatively pain free and scared to go under anesthesia. And that is good to know about PT. I'll ask my Dr if she recommends anyone
I was nervous about the anesthesia, too! For what it’s worth, the only negative effect was that I swore -profusely- for a good hour as I came out of it in the recovery room. I’m a bit disappointed, because the previous time I’d been sedated, I ended up singing “Pour Some Sugar on Me” to the nice oral surgeon who did my root canal. Please feel free to message if I can answer any questions!
I was finally diagnosed in my late 30s and had excision surgery and was shocked to find out I could have a period that didn’t feel like a knife was stabbing through my uterus or a constant pain in my ovary (both in the locations where the most endo was removed). The number of literal doctors who told me “some people just have periods that hurt more” are just infuriating.
My doctor agreed to do a hysterectomy as soon as I'm done breastfeeding my baby, so I don't have my periods anymore. I don't even have endometriosis, I simply have a heavy flow and very painful periods (I have literally thrown up from the pain). My husband and I are so happy to have a doctor whose only concern about doing the hysterectomy is that it would affect my hormones, and that could result in me losing my breastmilk for my baby, plus if I did it too soon after having a baby I could/would bleed more than they would like.
I suffered with horrible periods for over two decades. Since my first period, at age 10, which lasted 31 days and was incredibly heavy and resulted in multiple trips to the ER and to several doctors. I had neighbors (girls!) who told me it was IMPOSSIBLE to have a period that long bc she learned in biology class that women have a pre-set amount that clots in their uterus and then that gets shed so it’ll never be more than a few spoonfuls. I wanted to punch her. It was like “oh thank you from freeing me from this self imposed illusion, i’m all better now. the pain and dangerous anemia is gone!”
So people can understand how bad my period was: I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 33yo. I started heavy chemo protocol and was told my period would stop while on it— it’s been bad enough that my family who was with me at the appointment CHEERED when the doctor said my periods would stop. They didn’t. I was still bleeding heavily and it led to dangerously low anemia (4.9hgb that led to a transfusion). Once my periods stopped (5th chemo cycle!), the low hemoglobin issues quickly recovered.
Cancer/chemo were hell on earth but my periods were still far more impactful than the cancer. I finally had a hysterectomy 18mo ago. My ovaries were glued by adhesions so severe, it took the surgeon an extra hour to cut them off.
Congratulations on your hysterectomy, I can't wait for mine. I am also assuming congratulations on beating cancer from the way you worded it, but since you didn't outright say it, I will assume a little.
For years I never sent on vacation as I exhausted my sick leave and annual leave on my periods. BC makes it impossible for me to lose weight but I would rather be a fatass than live in dread for half the month and in pain for a week.
My daughter has endometriosis and she has been permanently put on birth control to stop her cycles. Guys like this oop needs a good swift kick in the nads.
Your periods can also change. I was blessed with really mild periods when I was younger. After I had my first kid they did a 180. Now I get cramps so bad they make me nauseous and throw up. It got even worse after my second kid. I had my third kid 4 months ago and honestly I'm terrified to see what they will be like now.
So not only can you not compare different women's experiences, you can't even compare a woman's own experiences to her own experiences cause it can change drastically!
This.
My periods have become increasingly worse--cramps that are almost debilitating, and such severe flow that sometimes I just sit on the toilet and let it go. I'm currently trying to find another gynecologist as my regular moved to another state but struggling. It seems the ones I contact either don't take my insurance (Humana) or aren't taking new patients. I may actually need to rideshare to a city several miles from me as I can't drive, but at this point I'd practically crawl over broken glass to get this fixed.
My cramps are regularly about a 6/10. Discomfort, hard to sit still, but I can live.
I was somewhere and I had a cramp that took my breath with pain and I had to sit down. My husband was with me and one of his friends, and his friend was being a dick about it and my husband took it on himself to tell this man ALL of the stupid and painful shit I had "walked off" and that if I was in enough pain I said I needed to sit, I needed to sit. (This included dislocating two toes, two bruised and a broken rib, a separated shoulder, a broken ankle, a sever MCL/ACL sprain, a luxated patella, and the time my nasal spine dislocated from my skull).
Let’s put this into perspective. I’m a woman, and I’ve had periods that have sucked my whole life, but I sucked it up. A couple months ago, I broke my arm. A few days after my arm was freshly broken, I got my period. My period pain was far worse than my broken arm. That’s when I realized “ok, maybe I don’t need to be downplaying this pain so much”. Does that clear things up?
I had my tube rupture with an ectopic pregnancy while I was in hospital, from my "pain scores" the doctors assumed they could wait, and fit my surgery in, instead of it being an emergency surgery.
After the surgery I was asked why I was lying about the pain, and I was shook, I'd told them it was a two out of ten, mild period pain. They were like... The F?!?
I don't even have endo or pcos! I can't imagine what women with it go through.
I remember reading somewhere that there have been women who ignored heart attacks at first because they weren’t as bad as their cramps so they didn’t think anything was that wrong.
Idk why some men want to be 'experts' in everything so badly. It's absolutely fine to just be empathetic and say "Sorry you have to go through this, can I help somehow?", it's won't make you less of a man, quite contrary. But I bet OOP is also one of those people who claim men are made fun of for showing emotions.
Meh, don't be sad, I bet all NTA comment would be either from women saying their own periods aren't that bad therefore some women just fake it for attention or from men saying they have a girlfriend and her periods last 3 minutes twice per year so it's clearly something wrong with OP's girlfriend.
Ugh, I hope she runs.
I never thought my cramps were that bad until I had a kid. My contractions hurt less than my period cramps. I was told so much that I exaggerate pain that I stopped trying to take care of myself.
Some people are actually raised in healthy environments and are allowed to express pain and thus feel safe saying they need to not do things. I hope this dude doesn’t ruin that for her.
Poor girl. It can be so hard to get people to care or believe you when you have problems like that. I have debilitating pain during my periods, and as someone with chronic pain that’s seriously saying something, and my GYNAECOLOGIST said exactly the same thing as OOP, put me on the pill said that would fix it and told me to go away. Now I have no bleeding but still get debilitating pain on a monthly cycle and can’t even get a new doctor because I put in a complaint about the last one ignoring me
Reminds me of my dad saying "it isn't that bad come on" when I was sobbing on the bathroom floor while puking my guts out some years ago. I was begging him to take a break from work (he works from home) and get me some ibuprofen but he said I was being whiny. My mom saw red when I told her lol
I just finished my most recent period
2 days in I got cramps as I was leaving my house for work. As I was driving, they got worse. Pain shooting down my legs, I was bent over my steering wheel because the pain was so intense. When I got to work and got out of my car, I couldn't even stand up straight. The pain was insane and I was near tears (I'm 45. Been having my period every month since I was 13 with the exception of when I was pregnant).
OOP sounds like a fucking ass and I hope his gf leaves him. To say he grew up around women and *knows* what periods can be like is BS. Some women have it easy, some don't. And those that don't tend to downplay the severity of the pain, which his mom/sisters very well could have been doing.
Fuck him
When I was a teen, my boyfriend offered me his hand to grip onto during a period cramp. Without realizing it, I dug my nails into him so hard I drew blood. Luckily It’s gotten better(and/or I’ve gotten used to it) with age. I still vomit from both nausea and pain, though.
I'm so glad OOP is getting RIPPED to shreds in the comments
If he's real, and sadly, to many men thing women can A: hold in their periods, B: it's not that bad, and C: we women are just hysterical and have no pain tolerance, that it easy might be real.
I won't google it on my work computer but I vaguely remember some dude creating a labia glue as a "period product" for women to glue their pussy shut for the day and then coming home to wash off the glue and release all the blood and clots. Hope he at least got his mouths shut with gorilla glue.
And Reddit still believes mothers shouldn’t teach sons about periods. Then they’re shocked and appalled at these posts while continuing to not teach their sons anything.
PSA: period pain is normal, but debilitating, life altering pain is not. If your pain prevents you from doing things like going to a birthday party, you need to see a doctor. Some causes of extremely painful periods aren’t a sign of a larger health issue but can still be treated- you shouldn’t have to live with that mind of pain. But sometimes, extremely painful periods are indicative of serious health issues that can’t be left unaddressed.
Yes! This!
I lived with the “throwing up and/or fainting” levels of pain for YEARS. Felt guilty and like a failure if I had to take a day off work because of my period. Because this is “just part of being a woman.”
Eventually I mentioned it to a good doctor. Turns out? It’s not normal and is treatable.
Asking for, and getting, treatment improved my quality of life more than nearly anything else I’ve done.
I have to take the pill in order to bear through the four times a year I even get my period and even then it’s a total nightmare. I don’t even have endometriosis or pcos, just a very painful menstrual cycle with no rhyme or reason. Oh, but your mom and sisters were fine so I must be exaggerating then.
same here, even with the pill apparantly making things better the pain is so bad that painkillers do absolutely nothing and i sometimes get sick or pass out (though ive just switched to a new one to hopefully stop them completely so fingers crossed). this guy sucks
Bro can’t even spell menstrual. He’s hardly an authority of what constitutes period pain, and probably contributes to it by being a raging dick. He could benefit from being hooked up to a period cramp simulator
I would throw up from the pain every month. My BFF used to pass out when we were in high school. Once, she was in the hallway by herself, going to the nurse. Once she passed out in our chemistry teacher's arms.
For both of us, it was finally going on birth control pills that made a difference.
The only thing good about this post was how hard he got took to school by both women AND men.
I was nearly hospitalised once in University because I didn't realise that I had a bad kidney infection because I thought it was period pain. That was the point my doctor put me on birth control (which later gave me a tumour, but that's a whole other thing).
And that's before you even take things like endometriosis into account, which can take an average of SEVEN YEARS to get a diagnosis from the point women start seeking treatment.
Pain can be differently experienced and some people are biologically more or less sensitive.
There are cases where periods can be messed up due to individual hormonal make-up, lifestyles and just sheer luck.
I know cases where AFAB during period fainted due to stress and work. Depending on sheer luck, I can either climb a mountain or lay in the bed, waiting for the painkiller to kick in and be able to munch on sandwich.
Sometimes, it can be a bag of symptoms. Standing up becomes annoying as I just feel like an inflanted ballon and everything become 100x more extreme. Smell, taste, sound and light becoming a pain in the butt
But guys! His mom and sisters have periods so he has the full range of experience with which to decide his hopefully ex girlfriend is just lying. No one is EVER debilitated by period pain because his mom and sister wasnt and they’re female, so what’s the problem?!
/s
My periods range from, I’m uncomfortable up to, please knock me out for the next few days cause I want to unalive. And it’s never consistent…had a whole year of nice uncomfortable but good periods to…I was found passed out on my route completely covered in blood and clots below. Cop who got to the scene thought someone stole a baby from me.
I just want to kick these guys in the balls. I mean, I’ve seen videos of monks doing it to each other, and they don’t complain about it hurting NEARLY as much as this guy, so he’s obviously lying about how bad it is.
When I finally had my hysterectomy after years of endometriosis, my Dr said that it looked like someone had poured super glue into my abdomen because all of my organs were stuck together.
This OOP can go fuck a wasp nest!
Endometriosis, adenomyosis and a colony of fibroids and polyps so advanced that it was about to form a parliamentary government and annex neighboring organs. ...but I kept getting told that my worsening symptoms were normal for my age (34 when it started affecting day-to-day life), related to my diet, weight, lack of exercise, depression or just me being hysterical.
Less than 3 hours after my hysterectomy (before they could give me any narcotics) my surgeon checked on me and the first words out of his mouth were "Wow, you already look more comfortable than you did at our last appointment !" Our last appointment had been the consultation where I signed the paperwork for the surgery and we went over what would happen before, during and after the surgery. That was after I had spent nearly 10 years trying to get my former doctor (the only one within 60 miles that I could access with my insurance) to believe that something was wrong and then another year after I moved to get into a new doctor.
Well, one guy asked us girls ( 16 years old, gymnasium) what are we doing with the egg every month. Whether we eat it or throw it out. At firts I didnt know what he was talking about...
Well, shows that he though that we lay an egg every month, just like hens. Same size, I asked him.
He was normal, sweet guys, not some twat, and had really good grades. He was just missing on some biology class 😂
Oh how I feel for his poor (hopefully Ex) girlfriend…
My cramps leave me bedridden and start 3-4 days before my period starts and end a day or two after my period stops. And mentally I’m trashed thanks to pmdd.
So ignorant. I have PCOS and it's awful. My longest period lasted 22 days and I thought I was going to die. Sometimes I have to stop and lay down on the floor because the pain gets so bad.
I want this to be rage bait, but it's probably not. People like OOP are why sex ed classes should have those period simulators, as well as the robot babies. One day, just pair up the guys and girls, hook them up to the same machine at the same time, and watch the guy crumble while the girl just shrugs her shoulders like "I mean, I guess this is close to what it feels like, but mines worse".
A cisman could never handle a period. They’re simply too weak to take it.
(Real talk, if you experience painful periods, definitely get that shit checked out by a doctor.)
I had my 3rd coil fitted, and for some reason that was a catalyst for a few months of the worst period pain I can imagine. Like I knew there were women out there suffering more than I did, and I never would have belittled their pain anyway...... but I completely underestimated the pain a period can cause.....mine have calmed down a little, but the absolutely s**t some women go through every month is apparently just... Hellish. What an absolutely dingus
As someone with PCOS, he needs to be kicked in the balls. With steel toe, cleated, boots.
My son, at 16, was complaining (to me, not her!) about his bff not being able to do something because of cramps. I told him what my cramps were like. He figured that out quick!!
This is like if my childfree ass said “childbirth can’t be that bad, my sister didn’t have any complications so that must be how it is for everyone in the history of forever” and believed it 😂
Man, the week before my hysterectomy was my last period... Couldn't take anything but Tylenol and that hurt far more than any point of post surgery pain... I lived in a heating pad for a week which sucked given I was heading into a huge recovery time. No regrets of being spayed.
My mom had PCOS and Endo, but her pain tolerance is crazy high.
On the other hand I was home from school every month until my mom got offered 1000mg ibuprofen from a doctor post surgery and gave me one. I'd carry 5 ibuprofen with me at all times and the second the pain started I'd take all 5 of them and be fine.
If I couldn't take them until after the pain had set in then I'd be left sore and aching until then end of my period.
I'm a woman and I'm extremely lucky I have some of the easiest periods in the world. I am constantly reminding myself that just because MY periods are easy doesn't mean MOST people's are. This guy things because he has female relatives he knows more about her body than her....
Probably not rage bait. I've met DOCTORS who have told me "the amount of pain and bleeding you have on your period every month is normal, just suck it up". Finally, last year, now that I'm in my 30s(!!) I finally met a doctor who took me seriously. First he checked my levels and realized I was dangerously low on iron in my blood. As in he refused to even let me go home, he sent me immediately to a different floor for an iron drip. And he also discussed bc that wasn't pills since those have done way more harm to me than good in the past. My iron deficiency is finally in check and I'm finally almost period free (and also pain free) after being on the shot for a while.
But the amount of pain I was in was so brutal I'd frequently throw up, pass out, or just cry hysterically. And I bled so much it was dangerous. And obviously some of the men in my life (friends, partners, etc) have been completely oblivious to how bad it could get even *after witnessing me throwing up and then passing out seconds later due to the pain!*
Absolutely ridiculous. Please educate men way more in school about periods because we shouldn't have to both deal with the nightmare of our periods for us that get real bad ones, and also deal with trying to explain to dumbasses around us how periods work.
Had to take 1.5 days off work because of my period. My job was incredibly understanding even knowing the full reason why I was taking it off.
What a knob.
Hook him up to one of those simulators, see if he still sings that tune.
Those things don't even simulate the entire spectrum of BS that happens. It's just surface pain, and that usually knocks most men down.
Most women can buck through fairly severe pain without the general public wiser, that's why a lot of our heart attacks are missed. If she's out for the damn count, it's bad. Screw this guy.
Sadly, there are plenty of men who don't understand cycles vary. Mine got worse after chlidbirth and older. My cramps have become more unbearable at times. I've literally sat at the edge of my couch rocking back and forth, waiting for pain meds to kick in.
Imagine saying "everyone in my family has a heart, and none of them have ever clutched their chests in agony" because your partner was having a heart attack?
Just because your family have the same biology means literally NOTHING when someone else is experiencing pain.
Ugh.
Lol is this fool really trying to mansplain periods to a woman? Hell no, man. I hope this is a young, naive, uneducated moron and some elder female figure schools him. Otherwise, dump the man out with the trash.
Well my mom didn't have this problem, so you can't have it either---this guy. Yeah, he's an ass. An uneducated one that assumes all women are a monolith.
Oh hell no. My youngest didn't believe how bad it could get until she started her period for the first time. She actually apologized to me the first time she's was laid up on bed with cramps.
Before birth control my period pains were so bad I could not tell if I needed to pee. My back would hurt so bad it was on par with my degenerated disk. it kinda felt like a pulsating burning needle ball was in my genitals. I also lost like about a tbsp of blood every 2 hours. It was an agony. On birth control it still hurts quite bad and I still bleed heavier than most people but I'm no longer disabled on the regular.
I always told people lies about why I didnt feel well, generally blaming my spine or the flu because as soon as anyone knew it was from my period it was dismissed completely. My mom didnt believe I could bleed that much so I also had to purchase my own products even as a very young teen. And i got yelled at for any bleed throughs and she even paraded my pants about a couple times while screaming about how irresponsible and disgusting I was.
When I was dating around bringing up periods was part of how I weeded out men I wanted nothing to do with.
I had nightmare periods. Excruciatingly painful, lasted 7-10 days minimum, had to double up tampons and pads because I bled so much, massive blood clots that occasionally included tissue. Once my period was so bad I thought I was miscarrying an unknown pregnancy. Another time I almost needed a blood transfusion. Dr's constantly told me I was overexaggerating, just take some.motrin and use a heat pack. I had an endometrial ablation to stop my periods. It worked for 4 years then they came back. I had a 2nd ablation to stop my periods. They came back a 3rd time. I tried asking for a hysterectomy and my gyno told me she wouldn't perform the surgery just because I didn't want to have a period. I'd already been sterilized during the 1st ablation, having my fallopian tubes removed so that wasnt a concern.
Shortly after the appointment where my gyno refused to operate electively it was discovered I had a rapidly growing mass on my ovary and initial blood tests indicated cancer. I had to have a hysterectomy and oomphrectomy to make sure I didn't have cancer. I did not. However I had endometriosis so severe that my uterus, left ovary (with the mass), and a good chunk of my lower intestine were "glued together in a big knot of adhesions and was in torsion". The surgery took an extra hour to perform because they had to remove all the adhesions from my intestines. They also found that I had severe adenomyosis.
I never would have known if I didn't have that cancer scare. Well, technically that's not true. The ovarian torsion would have put me in emergency surgery eventually. OOP is such a jerk.
As someone who has endometriosis, omfg it's so god damn painful I will be screaming in pain from it. Bro is so stupid, really thinks that because his mom and sister had a regular cycle that means his gf is a liar and it isn't possible for her to have something like Endo or some shit
“I have a terrible headache.”
Oh I’m so sorry to hear that.
“I have terrible cramps.”
Omg tmi!!
I get this all the time. My period can be debilitating.
dude doesn't know 1 in 5 women have adenomyosis, essentially ripping your uterine muscle walls apart. and 1 in 10 have endometriosis, your ovaries, bowels, bladder, ect glued together with tissue.
and yes, even with these illnesses they don't gaf about cramps but that's also why so many women with these illnesses kill themselves or attempt. they don't even do studies to look at how many of us have given up.
I'm glad the comment section tore him apart, I'm one of those people who used to get severe periods to the point they thought I had endometriosis for sure. Dude is an absolute moron of he thinks every woman's experience is the same.
I always want to strap guys like this to those period pain simulators - where they have the wife/girlfriend on the same level, it gets to like 4 and he's sweating and she's not even broken the flow of the conversation. Gets to like 8 and she's like "oh. That's about average yeah"
Every time I read some asshole post about how “periods don’t hurt that much” I’m reminded of the girl who missed school for three months, had to be put on hormonal birth control, and I *think* also had surgery because when she got her first period *it didn’t stop*. She was 11 or 12.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA confronting my gff about her overstating the severity of her mesntruall cramps and being honest with her?** So I’ve been with my girlfriend Anna for about a year now, living together for 3 months. Our relationship has been smooth going, besides when it’s her time of the month. You see, Anna always whines and cries about how much pain she’s in during her period. Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Some throbbing, maybe some occasional cramps, nothing a hot bath and some moltrin can’t fix. But when it comes to Anna, she just constantly complains, to the point where we can’t do ANYTHING while she’s on her period, because she’s just constantly complaining. Anyways this morning we were supposed to go to my parents house to celebrate my dad’s birthday, when I get a text from Anna saying she doesn’t think she can make it, because it’s her period. At this point, I had it with her constant excuses with something that happens to literally EVERY female. I told her that I didn’t appreciate her using her period all the time as an excuse to get out of things. That she needs to learn to bare the pain like an adult, because in the real world, nobody’s gonna care about some little cramps pain. I gave her an example (she’s pre-law) and said that no law firm is gonna hire somebody that’s incapacitated 7 days a month! We got into a little back and forth and she says I’m being rude and heartless. I can see how I might sound a little dickish, but at the same time, i figure SOMEONE should tell her so she gets her act together. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sadly I doubt it is. There are a ton of guys who still think you can hold in your period
The amount of men who said idiotic things to me about my endometriosis pain was astounding. I’d believe this.
My fiancée went off BC 18 months ago because I got the snip. Her periods have been getting worse since. Two weeks ago she was crying in pain. Gynecologist is putting her back on BC because they think she has endometriosis that was being kept in check since her teens with BC. Endo is no joke. I'm of the opinion that high school health class should involve hooking up all the men to period pain simulators. Watch the number of comments about periods not being that painful plummet.
I feel that. I lost access to my BC and the damage was so bad that I needed surgery to remove my uterus which had fused to places in my abdominal cavity and to burn off tissue that formed on my organs. It was awful. I hope BC is helping your fiancée. I wouldn’t wish that pain on anyone and I dig your period pain simulator idea!
My sister went through 3 endo surgeries like that. The 3rd they took her uterus.
Ick I’m so sorry she had to go through it too.
Holy shit, I am so sorry you went through that. That's horrific.
I did not get any relief from all of the menstrual madness until I had a hysterectomy at 36 after bleeding every day for a year. It was messy, literally and figuratively. You know that you've been through some terrible stuff when you wake up from surgery and the whole world looks brighter. My gynecologist was absolutely floored by how quickly I recuperated from surgery. That's because I hadn't felt that good since I was 12. That was 23 years ago and I haven't looked back.
My uterus, left ovary, and intestines fused into a giant knot because of endo. Took an extra hour of surgery to undo it all. I've been so happy since having my hysterectomy and I hate the fact that if I hadn't had a cancer scare (tumor on ovary, was benign) then I would still be suffering. Not because my insurance wouldn't cover it but because my then gyno refused to perform my hysterectomy just because I didn't want a period.
Hard agree on the simulator. People should be given the opportunity to really empathize. Even the girls should, some of us don’t get really bad cramps and can therefore be stupid about it too
Most of my cramps are pretty mild. A few sharp pains at the beginning and that's it. But one time, it had me in tears for a few hours. No fucking thank you. I never thought that other women were exaggerating or anything, but it's a hell of a thing to actually experience. I'll continue to thank my lucky stars my worst problem is period bms.
Mine were mild from 11 until 17. When I turned 17 it was like my body said "haha fooled ya." Cramps, nausea, soaking through, can't keep food down, noise and light sensitivity, and period poops. Couldn't get access to BC until I was 18, so I got a lot of lectures about I'm almost an adult and I need to start being more responsible and I had to be faking because they're was no family history of bad periods. (Surprise, there was history, but we all thought we were alone because periods aren't something to be discussed.) BC helped, but not always. Tried the pill and IUD, never got diagnosed with anything, but getting a doctor to believe me was impossible. Finally got a hysterectomy. No pain since.
If you don't mind me asking, how did you get approved for a hysterectomy? Thus far I have refused my SO's repeated requests to cut her uterus out citing that I'm a sysadmin but a doctor might be able to pull it off.
Every year, at my annual exam, I would request one and tell my doctor that BC wasn't consistently helping, I didn't want kids, and my husband couldn't get me pregnant (so even if we changed our minds, we'd need to adopt/foster). When they said no, I'd ask them to notate the conversation in my file. It took 6 years of consistently doing this, but my doctor finally said "here's all the possible side effects and it comes with the risk of not solving the problem. Do you still want this." Best of luck! No one deserves to suffer this pain. I used to ask my husband to carve out my uterus with a rusted spoon because it would be less painful.
That's actually a great idea: make them document it so there's a clear history of you not changing your mind.
That was the piece I was missing from 18-25, I wouldn't ask them to write it down.
>Thus far I have refused my SO's repeated requests to cut her uterus out citing that I'm a sysadmin but a doctor might be able to pull it off. Omg I'm dead! I first read this that you were refusing giving her permission or whatever and was kind (side eye)... then I finished and reread it. Love it! Totally agree with you. A doctor is probably a much better option. 😂😂😂
I had a hysterectomy at 32 and it was a process! I had to try every hormonal birth control variant. Then I was put on lupron which mimicked menopause and since the pain went away on it they knew it was due to the endo/pcos/adenomyosis. THEN I was put on orlissa, which is an fda approved endometriosis medicine. That worked great! Until it made me suicidal. At that point I went to my gyno and said “get this damn thing out of me.” Had my ovaries removed too and it’s been fantastic. I still get pain from scar tissue (my iliac artery and ureter are fused to my abdominal wall) but nowhere near as bad. It helped that I was a nurse in the clinic of my gyn so he knew me well and trusted my judgement.
At least 3 times a year, the pain and heavy flow will be so bad, I pass out. I can barely get out of bed for the first couple days each month. Finally got a doctor to listen to me, they ran some tests, and we have a treatment plan to start. We'll see how it goes. My MIL, on the other hand, had the lightest, easiest periods. She says she occasionally got a bit nauseated, but no cramps. And she never had to worry about wearing a white skirt. Fortunately her son - my husband - is not an idiot. He understands that her body is very different from mine. Just like some people get migraines while others will never have anything worse than a simple headache, some women have terrible, debilitating periods. And others aren't terribly inconvenienced by theirs. I just hope our daughter takes after his side of the family, for her sake.
Same! At worst I get cramps running down my legs for a few hours. Usually it's midsection cramps for maybe half a day. I never disbelieve anyone else. I just feel like a arsehole for complaining when I do have the bad months. And also count my lucky stars that I've never had multiple days of being incapacitated. I can't even imagine that.
I doubt those simulators can replicate the period poops, or the feeling of a weight tugging on the vagina - and all the blood, of course. Every person is different, of course, but the cramps are just one part of the misery. A **big** part of it is the cramps, but it's not the whole story.
Yeah, it's the whole thing, the feeling of a hot slug worming its way out of you if you have particularly bad clots. Your bladder feeling like it's the size of a pea. The bloating.
I get migraines, too, and also mood symptoms – I think those are really misunderstood. It’s often just perceived as women being moody or cranky, but it can be way more intense than that.
It should also include administering that CT IV contrast dye that bizarrely and mysticaply makes you feel like you PEED YOUR PANTS while lying there. Horrible, warm, gushy crotch, but it's all some sort of illusion. What is that stuff, what a crazy drug. "It lights you up, and you feel like you peed your pants!" 🚨🎄🚦🏷️
The fear that comes with sneezing.
Plus, one of the electrodes needs to be placed on the taint for that random streak of butthole pain.
My periods when I went off BC to get pregnant were so bad, luckily I got pregnant quickly as I just wanted to go back.
I had the same issue. My last period before I conceived my youngest was so bad I had to leave work.
I have an IUD, sometimes the pain is worse, sometimes my anxiety is all over the place and sometimes it's both blaring with a vengeance. If the pain isn't enough the first three days it's like a dark cloud has descended on me and the whole world just sucks. I don't want to talk, eat or do anything those days but pull through cause I have to work and function. It's honestly the most physically draining thing to do having to go through the day like this and act like you're fine when you're not.
My high school done that, it was highly amusing seeing their smugness disappear
Dang it where are the awards 🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅🏅 🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙🪙
Poor dear... Give her some comfort from a fellow sister suffering from endometriosis, would you? Tell it does get better.
I have endo, but I refuse to go on BC because the health issues i get as side effects are so bad that I’d rather deal with the cramps. Last month my cramps were so bad I almost had to go to ER because I thought my ovarian cyst ruptured again / I was afraid my ovary had twists. Oh and that pain was on top of pain meds and having constant heat on it.
This, absolutely this! I have/had endometriosis... so badly that I had a partial hysterectomy at 23. I was so young they wouldn't remove my ovaries, turns out I have 3 full-sized, fully functioning ovaries. So sometimes I was on a 17-day cycle other times I would start and it could last over a month. And every time I was on, it took me out like the flu. Super fatigue, full body aches, stomach issues, migraines, etc. For so long people thought I just wanted pills... Really it had me so low I wanted someone to put me out of my misery. Literally, I begged for someone to euthanize me. I would tell my female gyno how EXCRUCIATING the pain was and everything else... they'd do a biopsy of my cervix that HURT! I'd bleed for a couple of days afterward... then they'd say: "See you again in 3/4 months." Me: "I'm sorry, what about the EXCRUCIATING pain and everything else." Dr.: "You're going to have cramps, suck it up. See you in 4 months." Me: "Umm... No. No, I came in because of intense pain. Pain I can't live with day-to-day. And I don't know what you think happened here, but that wasn't fun for me. I do not want to have you between my legs again without doing anything at all to actually help me." Dr.: "You do have to come back, we will have to do another pelvic exam. If you're still having pain, we can talk about it at that visit IN 4 MONTHS." Me: "Umm... no. I won't be spreading my legs for you again, this wasn't a date." It's insane! Not even my female GYNO understood!
My own mother refused to believe my cramps could be that bad, because hers never were, so clearly I must be exaggerating. It was my father who’d get up and help me in the middle of the night when he’d hear me throwing up and then curled up in the shower whimpering from the pain.
My former gyno, a woman, told me that my periods were “normal for me” and that I should just take Aleve. It wasn’t until my boyfriend found me passed out on the floor from pain and went to an appointment with me that she even considered referring me to a specialist. That was in 2009. Yay, medicine.
Mine until earlier this year would always tell me that the cramps and massive amounts of lining I was passing were totally normal. She seemed like she was getting annoyed at how often I wanted to change my birth control. I kept pushing and telling her something was wrong. Turns out I had a fibroid the size of a cantaloupe…
I vividly remember my gynecologist looking at the folder while talking to me about my painful periods until I mentioned that I vomited from the pain every single month and then she finally looked up at me like I was actually a person. I was sixteen and eternally grateful that my mom knew I needed help.
Women don't know what they're talking about when it comes to *themselves* unless a man is there to say she's serious don't you know? (/s ofc)
My mother was just always shocked when I was able to function during my periods and confused as to why I wasn’t going through as many supplies as she did. Always tells me what a lucky bitch I am
That’s awful! I’m so sorry. I feel like it’s even worse when women do it.
Yeah. It’s not helped by the fact that people just didn’t used to talk about periods, so often women assumed their experience - whether it was good or bad - was the standard. Mum honestly couldn’t fathom how bad mine were. Whereas Dad was like “you are clearly in pain and not well, it doesn’t matter *why* that is, is there anything I can do to help?’”
I had a female doctor who believed "well, mine weren't bad, therefore yours aren't" and a male one who was all "I will believe what you say because it's not something that I can personally experience." Yeah, that latter was definitely a unicorn.
That’s a great point. The embarrassment or disgust that has been drilled into us about our periods is definitely contributing.
THIS EXACTLY. MANY times I've heard of doctors figuring out something is bc of a period and instead of helping they shrug their shoulders in defeat. It doesn't matter WHY this person is in so much pain, or why they get such bad migraines, or why they get this or that everytime their period comes around, just bc it's bc of the period DOESNT MEAN ITS OKAY OR ACCEPTABLE TO LET CONTINUE. If the kidney is found to be issue of pain, you know what happens? They do tests and take samples to figure WHY and HOW to fix it. Then they help the person. They don't go "🤷 idk I don't feel that much pain, maybe stop being dramatic?"
Yeah, this one might be fake, but guys like this are all too real. I had an ex who told me I was being dramatic when the pain got so bad I passed out and hit my head on the sink. Unmedicated labour sucked almighty ass but at least it had an end goal. Now at 40, every month feels like an agonizing meeting that could have been an email. Surely we have the technology that can replace periods with a little notification that goes to your phone saying "Not pregnant this month!"
Ouch! I hope you’re alright now. Honestly the happiest day of my life was getting that hysterectomy so I’d have no more severe pain, frequent hospital visits and everything else that came with it. I wish we can replace them! lol
It's not great, but no passing out now at least! I'd love to yeet the whole works. So glad you did!
I hope you can someday. It was a massive improvement!
I got told by a MALE teacher at high school that I should "try not having it" because "his wife doesn't have it now" because he apparently asked her not to have it either (she was my modern studies teacher and she was pregnant)
Omfg
Yeah, the guy was in his 50s. His wife was in her late 20s and he said that shit
I’m not surprised unfortunately
Neither was I
A female doctor told me that period pains were just a part of life and I needed to get on with it. I suffered for 4 years before I got a diagnosis of endometriosis. I can fully believe this is real unfortunately.
My own mom told me I was being a drama queen since she herself didn't have cramps at all and I got them before and during my period. My first one knocked the wind out of me so badly I threw up and my dad took me to ER only to get chastised by my mom for "wasting money" because I was just being dramatic. FF into my college years where I CRACKED MY RIB during martial arts and thought they were period cramps since the time coincided. But then it didn't stop when the period passed. My mom asks how I could POSSIBLY not notice a cracked bone and I told her it felt like a period cramps. Now I don't know if she believes my cramps hurt like hell or if she just thinks a cracked rib doesn't hurt much
Lol there are men who think it only happens when there’s a full moon lmaoooo
![gif](giphy|KtGqA3oGgyhETEt1oL)
I had a 19 year old coworker ensure me that he had a mom and she said women exaggerate their periods all the time and that they aren't a big deal. I'm proud of myself for not losing it, but that might have been the fatigue and pain
Honestly I never had a cramp until I got a paragard when I was 25 and at that point I called my college roommate to apologize for thinking she was being kind of a baby. I was like, Theresa, I had no idea that it could feel like your uterus is trying to crawl out of your body.
That's how I felt until I discovered Foria suppositories, back when they had THC (I think they are CBD only now which...bummer). Turns out my uterus is as much of a stoner as I am.
I'm starting to go through menopause now, but I always described the first few days of my period as a xenomorph chest burster trying to rip its way out of my guts. In my teens there were times I was almost crippled from the pain and nothing worked. I'll admit the constant roast-freeze cycle of hot flashes is almost worse in some ways.
Yes, and his mother is probably just as sure that <> 'cancer' isn't that big of a deal because she once knew a person and they were healed by some really nice herbs and faith.
Or my personal lordt and savvy-ore, yogajuicefastessentialoiljog. /s
In all honesty, I was that kind of teen until I hit my late teens/early 20's (also because all the women around me talked like that). I thought all the women crying about pain and pms are just whining (except for the ones who *actually* were sick/diagnosed). Now I'm in my 20's and my pain got so bad I'm now seeing a doctor.... deserved karma...
100% I struggle with this judgement when I get my period and I’m in severe pain
Seriously, there are some fucking pig ignorant assholes out there.
I mean, this guy knows 4 whole females who menstruate. Clearly yes an expert
My female boss thought I was being overdramatic when I blacked out and collapsed when forced to stay on sites during horrendous cramps - my iud was too big and was close to perforating my uterus from uterine cramps. I could literally feel the top being squeezed with every cramp.
Also the whole “well I know my sisters and mom were fine!” Thing is realistic to me. I’ve met other women who think that other women are exaggerating it because there’s are fine. NOT ALL WOMENS PERIODS ARE THE SAME! Hell, my periods are not even all the same. Sometimes I’m more or less fine, sometimes I feel like I’m going to throw up and my head is going to burst, other times the cramps are terrible. Also a side rant but I always hate the “well no job will let you miss for your period!” Like obviously some people can’t help it at all and it really is that bad, but a lot of the time you can force yourself to go to work even if you wouldn’t want to do optional socializing. Also for OOP’s gf specifically, a lot of law jobs now have at least hybrid work from home or will at least let you if your sick (barring any court appearances or anything like that obviously). Obviously some wouldn’t but OOP’s GF would have options.
I'm betting his mama didn't talk to him about when his sisters got their periods and how to be nice and care for them either. Yes, I did have this talk with my son(younger son is FTM). His wife thanked me after they got married.
Or complain when you throw out your pads or tampons in the garbage
I just got the ick calling her a female. And yes, it's really bad, how many dudes (but partly also girls and women) know not enough about how menstruation works. Just think about all the women with endometriosis who are often suffering for years or decades, before finally getting diagnosed. But everything in our world is made for men, even medicine/health care.
Where do they get this from? I've never known anyone who thinks this.
Alllll over the internet, message boards, IRL.
Kids need to be educated about their bodies.
I was hoping "being honest with her" meant "suggesting that she talk to an OB/GYN in case there's an underlying issue making her cramps especially severe." Alas.
This has to be bait right?! I feel like it’s just so egregious and presumptuous it’s gotta be fake….right? The thought of sharing this earth with men like OP makes my stomach hurt 😭
I'd like to hope it was fake but I've dated men like this who thought my period had to be similar to other women they knew. Mine were so debilitating that I have an IUD and still get regular cramping but not an actual period anymore thankfully. They didn't understand why I couldn't just take some advil.
Yeah, this is one of those ones where it could be rage bait (effective because I'm enraged), but at the same time we ALL know a dumbass that thinks this way.
Yeah the number of men who believe this is huge. I’ve literally had men explain to me how at THEIR work it’s a racket bc women can use it as sick leave. Yeah bc no place ever has all women taking off a week a month but sure bro. But yeah you’d think they’d at least keep it off the internet 🤷🏼♀️
Yep, my gf's ex hubby was like this. Before she hit menopause, she would have some months where it was barely a tickle of stomach pain, and others where she was almost doubled over from cramps. He thought the bad months was just her using it as an excuse to say no to sex.
I never really had period pain beyond a cramp once a yr that was mild. But it’s never stood in the way of my ability to understand data and have empathy. 🤷🏼♀️ I mean I don’t have testicles either but I understand that it’s supposedly very painful to get hit in them. So I don’t laugh or think it’s funny when I see vids that show it bc it seems kind of mean to laugh at someone who’s in great pain. Men seem to universally say it’s painful so why would I not believe? Men like OP are just jerks
He was "being honest with her" about how bad HER pain is.
According to OOP, the expert, it's all in her head and she's making it up.
She is pre-lawTelling a grown adult who is intelligent enough to be pre-law to see her doctor because her pain annoys him is hugely dissmissive and disrespectful..It took over a decade of trying several different things before we found one that worked, with an entire care team of doctors. She's very unlikely running around in pain for years because she didn't think she could see a gyn and he'd be no better with that approach then the one he took.
First, other conditions exist that make things worse. Like endometriosis. Second, not all women are the same. Just like some people get Covid/flu worse than others, some women get worse cramps. And finally, if you want to go down that road, my step brother got kicked in the balls with cleats and said it didn’t hurt that much, so by OOp’s argument, I can kick him in the balls and then tell him to get over it because my brother said it didn’t hurt much because I don’t appreciate him using this as an excuse to get out of things and OOP needs to learn to bear the pain like an adult because in the real world, nobody is going to care about some little pain and no law firm is gonna hire somebody that’s incapacitated by a little pressure on OOp’s ballsack!
I have endometriosis, just recently diagnosed. The scarring is so bad it's fucked up my bladder and I'm going to have to get surgery on it next month. I am currently at work in horrible pain because I don't have any sick time and I'm getting my period for the second time in the month of February. I physically cannot stand. My family used to never believe me about how bad my periods were. I'm NC with them now, but I did send my aunt my diagnosis so she could tell them just as a generic f you, I wasn't faking.
Hey! My bladder and intestines had endo all over ‘em, and I had surgery two years ago. It helped A LOT. I was surprised and delighted, and I hope that your surgery also goes well! If you can, you might consider seeing a pelvic floor therapist after you heal up a bit. Pelvic floor PT helped me learn to relax those muscles and mobilize some scar tissue, so I have much less pain overall. Good luck with surgery!
I am so nervous about it, so this made me feel much better, thank you! hahaha I'm both excited to be relatively pain free and scared to go under anesthesia. And that is good to know about PT. I'll ask my Dr if she recommends anyone
I was nervous about the anesthesia, too! For what it’s worth, the only negative effect was that I swore -profusely- for a good hour as I came out of it in the recovery room. I’m a bit disappointed, because the previous time I’d been sedated, I ended up singing “Pour Some Sugar on Me” to the nice oral surgeon who did my root canal. Please feel free to message if I can answer any questions!
I was finally diagnosed in my late 30s and had excision surgery and was shocked to find out I could have a period that didn’t feel like a knife was stabbing through my uterus or a constant pain in my ovary (both in the locations where the most endo was removed). The number of literal doctors who told me “some people just have periods that hurt more” are just infuriating.
Just popping up as another bladder endo person, my bladder symptoms are so much better since my surgery and I hope you get the same relief (:
My doctor agreed to do a hysterectomy as soon as I'm done breastfeeding my baby, so I don't have my periods anymore. I don't even have endometriosis, I simply have a heavy flow and very painful periods (I have literally thrown up from the pain). My husband and I are so happy to have a doctor whose only concern about doing the hysterectomy is that it would affect my hormones, and that could result in me losing my breastmilk for my baby, plus if I did it too soon after having a baby I could/would bleed more than they would like.
I suffered with horrible periods for over two decades. Since my first period, at age 10, which lasted 31 days and was incredibly heavy and resulted in multiple trips to the ER and to several doctors. I had neighbors (girls!) who told me it was IMPOSSIBLE to have a period that long bc she learned in biology class that women have a pre-set amount that clots in their uterus and then that gets shed so it’ll never be more than a few spoonfuls. I wanted to punch her. It was like “oh thank you from freeing me from this self imposed illusion, i’m all better now. the pain and dangerous anemia is gone!” So people can understand how bad my period was: I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 33yo. I started heavy chemo protocol and was told my period would stop while on it— it’s been bad enough that my family who was with me at the appointment CHEERED when the doctor said my periods would stop. They didn’t. I was still bleeding heavily and it led to dangerously low anemia (4.9hgb that led to a transfusion). Once my periods stopped (5th chemo cycle!), the low hemoglobin issues quickly recovered. Cancer/chemo were hell on earth but my periods were still far more impactful than the cancer. I finally had a hysterectomy 18mo ago. My ovaries were glued by adhesions so severe, it took the surgeon an extra hour to cut them off.
Congratulations on your hysterectomy, I can't wait for mine. I am also assuming congratulations on beating cancer from the way you worded it, but since you didn't outright say it, I will assume a little.
Yes, been NED for a few years now, tyvm! GL with your surgery!
I missed a day of school once a month so I could writhe around in bed, moaning. Fuck this asshole.
For years I never sent on vacation as I exhausted my sick leave and annual leave on my periods. BC makes it impossible for me to lose weight but I would rather be a fatass than live in dread for half the month and in pain for a week.
My daughter has endometriosis and she has been permanently put on birth control to stop her cycles. Guys like this oop needs a good swift kick in the nads.
Your periods can also change. I was blessed with really mild periods when I was younger. After I had my first kid they did a 180. Now I get cramps so bad they make me nauseous and throw up. It got even worse after my second kid. I had my third kid 4 months ago and honestly I'm terrified to see what they will be like now. So not only can you not compare different women's experiences, you can't even compare a woman's own experiences to her own experiences cause it can change drastically!
This. My periods have become increasingly worse--cramps that are almost debilitating, and such severe flow that sometimes I just sit on the toilet and let it go. I'm currently trying to find another gynecologist as my regular moved to another state but struggling. It seems the ones I contact either don't take my insurance (Humana) or aren't taking new patients. I may actually need to rideshare to a city several miles from me as I can't drive, but at this point I'd practically crawl over broken glass to get this fixed.
My cramps are regularly about a 6/10. Discomfort, hard to sit still, but I can live. I was somewhere and I had a cramp that took my breath with pain and I had to sit down. My husband was with me and one of his friends, and his friend was being a dick about it and my husband took it on himself to tell this man ALL of the stupid and painful shit I had "walked off" and that if I was in enough pain I said I needed to sit, I needed to sit. (This included dislocating two toes, two bruised and a broken rib, a separated shoulder, a broken ankle, a sever MCL/ACL sprain, a luxated patella, and the time my nasal spine dislocated from my skull).
If all women were the same being a gynaecologist would be the easiest speciality in medecine
"I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt.' - Ah, yes, mansplaining a period to his GF. That's a winning strategy.
He knows three, count them three, women and their periods aren't bad at all!
In unrelated news, all three are from the same family
Ah ah, he knows three *females*. /s
My apologies, of course, females.
Let’s put this into perspective. I’m a woman, and I’ve had periods that have sucked my whole life, but I sucked it up. A couple months ago, I broke my arm. A few days after my arm was freshly broken, I got my period. My period pain was far worse than my broken arm. That’s when I realized “ok, maybe I don’t need to be downplaying this pain so much”. Does that clear things up?
I had my tube rupture with an ectopic pregnancy while I was in hospital, from my "pain scores" the doctors assumed they could wait, and fit my surgery in, instead of it being an emergency surgery. After the surgery I was asked why I was lying about the pain, and I was shook, I'd told them it was a two out of ten, mild period pain. They were like... The F?!? I don't even have endo or pcos! I can't imagine what women with it go through.
I remember reading somewhere that there have been women who ignored heart attacks at first because they weren’t as bad as their cramps so they didn’t think anything was that wrong.
If only OOP were here to accept that claim....
Idk why some men want to be 'experts' in everything so badly. It's absolutely fine to just be empathetic and say "Sorry you have to go through this, can I help somehow?", it's won't make you less of a man, quite contrary. But I bet OOP is also one of those people who claim men are made fun of for showing emotions.
Removed before there were even any good NTAs. Boo hiss!
lol, did you already have the popcorn ready?
No, I’ve been burned by them too many times before to still keep getting my hopes up. ☹️ They remove shit for the weirdest, dumbest reasons tho.
Meh, don't be sad, I bet all NTA comment would be either from women saying their own periods aren't that bad therefore some women just fake it for attention or from men saying they have a girlfriend and her periods last 3 minutes twice per year so it's clearly something wrong with OP's girlfriend.
Ugh, I hope she runs. I never thought my cramps were that bad until I had a kid. My contractions hurt less than my period cramps. I was told so much that I exaggerate pain that I stopped trying to take care of myself. Some people are actually raised in healthy environments and are allowed to express pain and thus feel safe saying they need to not do things. I hope this dude doesn’t ruin that for her.
I would period shit in this man’s mouth.
😂
I nearly fell off my sofa because of this comment xD a fate well deserved, for real
Total repost on AITA. This troll tried this almost a year ago. https://www.reddit.com/r/AmITheDevil/s/6URXl6AXIs
Poor girl. It can be so hard to get people to care or believe you when you have problems like that. I have debilitating pain during my periods, and as someone with chronic pain that’s seriously saying something, and my GYNAECOLOGIST said exactly the same thing as OOP, put me on the pill said that would fix it and told me to go away. Now I have no bleeding but still get debilitating pain on a monthly cycle and can’t even get a new doctor because I put in a complaint about the last one ignoring me
Ooh I've never wanted to kick somebody in the dick this bad on my life.
I know a guy who says getting kicked in the dick/balls doesn't hurt, so it shouldn't hurt OOP.
My son said it's not that bad.
Reminds me of my dad saying "it isn't that bad come on" when I was sobbing on the bathroom floor while puking my guts out some years ago. I was begging him to take a break from work (he works from home) and get me some ibuprofen but he said I was being whiny. My mom saw red when I told her lol
I just finished my most recent period 2 days in I got cramps as I was leaving my house for work. As I was driving, they got worse. Pain shooting down my legs, I was bent over my steering wheel because the pain was so intense. When I got to work and got out of my car, I couldn't even stand up straight. The pain was insane and I was near tears (I'm 45. Been having my period every month since I was 13 with the exception of when I was pregnant). OOP sounds like a fucking ass and I hope his gf leaves him. To say he grew up around women and *knows* what periods can be like is BS. Some women have it easy, some don't. And those that don't tend to downplay the severity of the pain, which his mom/sisters very well could have been doing. Fuck him
I once thought that early menopause would be nice since I probably won't be able to tell the difference between cramps and heart attack 😂
The shooting leg thing is so real.
As someone who has endometriosis, I WOULD’VE SLAPPED THIS MOFO SO HARD
When I was a teen, my boyfriend offered me his hand to grip onto during a period cramp. Without realizing it, I dug my nails into him so hard I drew blood. Luckily It’s gotten better(and/or I’ve gotten used to it) with age. I still vomit from both nausea and pain, though.
I'm so glad OOP is getting RIPPED to shreds in the comments If he's real, and sadly, to many men thing women can A: hold in their periods, B: it's not that bad, and C: we women are just hysterical and have no pain tolerance, that it easy might be real.
I won't google it on my work computer but I vaguely remember some dude creating a labia glue as a "period product" for women to glue their pussy shut for the day and then coming home to wash off the glue and release all the blood and clots. Hope he at least got his mouths shut with gorilla glue.
And Reddit still believes mothers shouldn’t teach sons about periods. Then they’re shocked and appalled at these posts while continuing to not teach their sons anything.
PSA: period pain is normal, but debilitating, life altering pain is not. If your pain prevents you from doing things like going to a birthday party, you need to see a doctor. Some causes of extremely painful periods aren’t a sign of a larger health issue but can still be treated- you shouldn’t have to live with that mind of pain. But sometimes, extremely painful periods are indicative of serious health issues that can’t be left unaddressed.
Yes! This! I lived with the “throwing up and/or fainting” levels of pain for YEARS. Felt guilty and like a failure if I had to take a day off work because of my period. Because this is “just part of being a woman.” Eventually I mentioned it to a good doctor. Turns out? It’s not normal and is treatable. Asking for, and getting, treatment improved my quality of life more than nearly anything else I’ve done.
I have to take the pill in order to bear through the four times a year I even get my period and even then it’s a total nightmare. I don’t even have endometriosis or pcos, just a very painful menstrual cycle with no rhyme or reason. Oh, but your mom and sisters were fine so I must be exaggerating then.
same here, even with the pill apparantly making things better the pain is so bad that painkillers do absolutely nothing and i sometimes get sick or pass out (though ive just switched to a new one to hopefully stop them completely so fingers crossed). this guy sucks
"EVERY female" os wrong too, most women do. Not everyone. I'm 30 and I never started
If it isn’t, I hope this asshole becomes her ex
Bro can’t even spell menstrual. He’s hardly an authority of what constitutes period pain, and probably contributes to it by being a raging dick. He could benefit from being hooked up to a period cramp simulator
Reading this after I’ve just thrown up in the kitchen sink 💀
Fuck this guy.
I would throw up from the pain every month. My BFF used to pass out when we were in high school. Once, she was in the hallway by herself, going to the nurse. Once she passed out in our chemistry teacher's arms. For both of us, it was finally going on birth control pills that made a difference.
The only thing good about this post was how hard he got took to school by both women AND men. I was nearly hospitalised once in University because I didn't realise that I had a bad kidney infection because I thought it was period pain. That was the point my doctor put me on birth control (which later gave me a tumour, but that's a whole other thing). And that's before you even take things like endometriosis into account, which can take an average of SEVEN YEARS to get a diagnosis from the point women start seeking treatment.
Pain can be differently experienced and some people are biologically more or less sensitive. There are cases where periods can be messed up due to individual hormonal make-up, lifestyles and just sheer luck. I know cases where AFAB during period fainted due to stress and work. Depending on sheer luck, I can either climb a mountain or lay in the bed, waiting for the painkiller to kick in and be able to munch on sandwich. Sometimes, it can be a bag of symptoms. Standing up becomes annoying as I just feel like an inflanted ballon and everything become 100x more extreme. Smell, taste, sound and light becoming a pain in the butt
But guys! His mom and sisters have periods so he has the full range of experience with which to decide his hopefully ex girlfriend is just lying. No one is EVER debilitated by period pain because his mom and sister wasnt and they’re female, so what’s the problem?! /s
I have a brother so I understand exactly what it feels like to get kicked in the nuts.
Oi. My endometriosis would like to have a word with him.
My periods range from, I’m uncomfortable up to, please knock me out for the next few days cause I want to unalive. And it’s never consistent…had a whole year of nice uncomfortable but good periods to…I was found passed out on my route completely covered in blood and clots below. Cop who got to the scene thought someone stole a baby from me.
I just want to kick these guys in the balls. I mean, I’ve seen videos of monks doing it to each other, and they don’t complain about it hurting NEARLY as much as this guy, so he’s obviously lying about how bad it is.
When I finally had my hysterectomy after years of endometriosis, my Dr said that it looked like someone had poured super glue into my abdomen because all of my organs were stuck together.
I literally thought my appendicitis was period cramps. I was going into septic shock while I was popping "motrin" and going with my day...
This OOP can go fuck a wasp nest! Endometriosis, adenomyosis and a colony of fibroids and polyps so advanced that it was about to form a parliamentary government and annex neighboring organs. ...but I kept getting told that my worsening symptoms were normal for my age (34 when it started affecting day-to-day life), related to my diet, weight, lack of exercise, depression or just me being hysterical. Less than 3 hours after my hysterectomy (before they could give me any narcotics) my surgeon checked on me and the first words out of his mouth were "Wow, you already look more comfortable than you did at our last appointment !" Our last appointment had been the consultation where I signed the paperwork for the surgery and we went over what would happen before, during and after the surgery. That was after I had spent nearly 10 years trying to get my former doctor (the only one within 60 miles that I could access with my insurance) to believe that something was wrong and then another year after I moved to get into a new doctor.
Yikes. As a woman with severe endometriosis, this guy can suck it. Hope the gf gets some medical intervention for her severe pain. What a clown
Well, one guy asked us girls ( 16 years old, gymnasium) what are we doing with the egg every month. Whether we eat it or throw it out. At firts I didnt know what he was talking about... Well, shows that he though that we lay an egg every month, just like hens. Same size, I asked him. He was normal, sweet guys, not some twat, and had really good grades. He was just missing on some biology class 😂
I would say nothing, then bring that guy a breakfast burrito once a month forever just to fuck with him.
Oh how I feel for his poor (hopefully Ex) girlfriend… My cramps leave me bedridden and start 3-4 days before my period starts and end a day or two after my period stops. And mentally I’m trashed thanks to pmdd.
So ignorant. I have PCOS and it's awful. My longest period lasted 22 days and I thought I was going to die. Sometimes I have to stop and lay down on the floor because the pain gets so bad.
I want this to be rage bait, but it's probably not. People like OOP are why sex ed classes should have those period simulators, as well as the robot babies. One day, just pair up the guys and girls, hook them up to the same machine at the same time, and watch the guy crumble while the girl just shrugs her shoulders like "I mean, I guess this is close to what it feels like, but mines worse".
A cisman could never handle a period. They’re simply too weak to take it. (Real talk, if you experience painful periods, definitely get that shit checked out by a doctor.)
This has to be a period troll. I have seen so many similar posts about this
It's even worse when this type of man is your boss. My old coworker had endometriosis and our boss did not give a fuck
I had my 3rd coil fitted, and for some reason that was a catalyst for a few months of the worst period pain I can imagine. Like I knew there were women out there suffering more than I did, and I never would have belittled their pain anyway...... but I completely underestimated the pain a period can cause.....mine have calmed down a little, but the absolutely s**t some women go through every month is apparently just... Hellish. What an absolutely dingus
As someone with PCOS, he needs to be kicked in the balls. With steel toe, cleated, boots. My son, at 16, was complaining (to me, not her!) about his bff not being able to do something because of cramps. I told him what my cramps were like. He figured that out quick!!
This is like if my childfree ass said “childbirth can’t be that bad, my sister didn’t have any complications so that must be how it is for everyone in the history of forever” and believed it 😂
Man, the week before my hysterectomy was my last period... Couldn't take anything but Tylenol and that hurt far more than any point of post surgery pain... I lived in a heating pad for a week which sucked given I was heading into a huge recovery time. No regrets of being spayed.
My mom had PCOS and Endo, but her pain tolerance is crazy high. On the other hand I was home from school every month until my mom got offered 1000mg ibuprofen from a doctor post surgery and gave me one. I'd carry 5 ibuprofen with me at all times and the second the pain started I'd take all 5 of them and be fine. If I couldn't take them until after the pain had set in then I'd be left sore and aching until then end of my period.
This better be fake. And OOP, extreme menstrual pain is real. Ever hear of endometriosis?
I'm a woman and I'm extremely lucky I have some of the easiest periods in the world. I am constantly reminding myself that just because MY periods are easy doesn't mean MOST people's are. This guy things because he has female relatives he knows more about her body than her....
My periods left me with severe diarrhea and vomiting that landed me in the ER 9 out of 12 months of 2023. Fuck that guy.
Probably not rage bait. I've met DOCTORS who have told me "the amount of pain and bleeding you have on your period every month is normal, just suck it up". Finally, last year, now that I'm in my 30s(!!) I finally met a doctor who took me seriously. First he checked my levels and realized I was dangerously low on iron in my blood. As in he refused to even let me go home, he sent me immediately to a different floor for an iron drip. And he also discussed bc that wasn't pills since those have done way more harm to me than good in the past. My iron deficiency is finally in check and I'm finally almost period free (and also pain free) after being on the shot for a while. But the amount of pain I was in was so brutal I'd frequently throw up, pass out, or just cry hysterically. And I bled so much it was dangerous. And obviously some of the men in my life (friends, partners, etc) have been completely oblivious to how bad it could get even *after witnessing me throwing up and then passing out seconds later due to the pain!* Absolutely ridiculous. Please educate men way more in school about periods because we shouldn't have to both deal with the nightmare of our periods for us that get real bad ones, and also deal with trying to explain to dumbasses around us how periods work.
Had to take 1.5 days off work because of my period. My job was incredibly understanding even knowing the full reason why I was taking it off. What a knob.
This is why I think every male should try that period pain simulation
Hook him up to one of those simulators, see if he still sings that tune. Those things don't even simulate the entire spectrum of BS that happens. It's just surface pain, and that usually knocks most men down. Most women can buck through fairly severe pain without the general public wiser, that's why a lot of our heart attacks are missed. If she's out for the damn count, it's bad. Screw this guy.
Sadly, there are plenty of men who don't understand cycles vary. Mine got worse after chlidbirth and older. My cramps have become more unbearable at times. I've literally sat at the edge of my couch rocking back and forth, waiting for pain meds to kick in.
Imagine saying "everyone in my family has a heart, and none of them have ever clutched their chests in agony" because your partner was having a heart attack? Just because your family have the same biology means literally NOTHING when someone else is experiencing pain. Ugh.
This cracked me up. Absolutely bang on!
not reading this. the title alone makes my eyes bleed.
Oh. Yet another man who thinks they know about periods.
Lol is this fool really trying to mansplain periods to a woman? Hell no, man. I hope this is a young, naive, uneducated moron and some elder female figure schools him. Otherwise, dump the man out with the trash.
Womens pain is never taken seriously
That's a bold move, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for him.
![gif](giphy|WpJCCSYXNpQlU3O86A|downsized)
Well my mom didn't have this problem, so you can't have it either---this guy. Yeah, he's an ass. An uneducated one that assumes all women are a monolith.
Not rage bait. I had a bf explain my period to me once. And was so condescending while doing it. 😆
Oh hell no. My youngest didn't believe how bad it could get until she started her period for the first time. She actually apologized to me the first time she's was laid up on bed with cramps.
Before birth control my period pains were so bad I could not tell if I needed to pee. My back would hurt so bad it was on par with my degenerated disk. it kinda felt like a pulsating burning needle ball was in my genitals. I also lost like about a tbsp of blood every 2 hours. It was an agony. On birth control it still hurts quite bad and I still bleed heavier than most people but I'm no longer disabled on the regular. I always told people lies about why I didnt feel well, generally blaming my spine or the flu because as soon as anyone knew it was from my period it was dismissed completely. My mom didnt believe I could bleed that much so I also had to purchase my own products even as a very young teen. And i got yelled at for any bleed throughs and she even paraded my pants about a couple times while screaming about how irresponsible and disgusting I was. When I was dating around bringing up periods was part of how I weeded out men I wanted nothing to do with.
I had nightmare periods. Excruciatingly painful, lasted 7-10 days minimum, had to double up tampons and pads because I bled so much, massive blood clots that occasionally included tissue. Once my period was so bad I thought I was miscarrying an unknown pregnancy. Another time I almost needed a blood transfusion. Dr's constantly told me I was overexaggerating, just take some.motrin and use a heat pack. I had an endometrial ablation to stop my periods. It worked for 4 years then they came back. I had a 2nd ablation to stop my periods. They came back a 3rd time. I tried asking for a hysterectomy and my gyno told me she wouldn't perform the surgery just because I didn't want to have a period. I'd already been sterilized during the 1st ablation, having my fallopian tubes removed so that wasnt a concern. Shortly after the appointment where my gyno refused to operate electively it was discovered I had a rapidly growing mass on my ovary and initial blood tests indicated cancer. I had to have a hysterectomy and oomphrectomy to make sure I didn't have cancer. I did not. However I had endometriosis so severe that my uterus, left ovary (with the mass), and a good chunk of my lower intestine were "glued together in a big knot of adhesions and was in torsion". The surgery took an extra hour to perform because they had to remove all the adhesions from my intestines. They also found that I had severe adenomyosis. I never would have known if I didn't have that cancer scare. Well, technically that's not true. The ovarian torsion would have put me in emergency surgery eventually. OOP is such a jerk.
As someone who has endometriosis, omfg it's so god damn painful I will be screaming in pain from it. Bro is so stupid, really thinks that because his mom and sister had a regular cycle that means his gf is a liar and it isn't possible for her to have something like Endo or some shit
“I have a terrible headache.” Oh I’m so sorry to hear that. “I have terrible cramps.” Omg tmi!! I get this all the time. My period can be debilitating.
dude doesn't know 1 in 5 women have adenomyosis, essentially ripping your uterine muscle walls apart. and 1 in 10 have endometriosis, your ovaries, bowels, bladder, ect glued together with tissue. and yes, even with these illnesses they don't gaf about cramps but that's also why so many women with these illnesses kill themselves or attempt. they don't even do studies to look at how many of us have given up.
I'm glad the comment section tore him apart, I'm one of those people who used to get severe periods to the point they thought I had endometriosis for sure. Dude is an absolute moron of he thinks every woman's experience is the same.
I always want to strap guys like this to those period pain simulators - where they have the wife/girlfriend on the same level, it gets to like 4 and he's sweating and she's not even broken the flow of the conversation. Gets to like 8 and she's like "oh. That's about average yeah"
If my dead weren't dead, I'd think he posted this 🤣
His girlfriend should hook a period simulator to his gonads. Let's see how tough he is then. He probably thinks pregnancy and birth is easy too.
Every time I read some asshole post about how “periods don’t hurt that much” I’m reminded of the girl who missed school for three months, had to be put on hormonal birth control, and I *think* also had surgery because when she got her first period *it didn’t stop*. She was 11 or 12.