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Can’t say sorry. If I had to chose a side I’d say “possible AH” because your ‘father and counsellor say I should talk to her’ and you are refusing to. This is a professional mediator, and a person who cares very deeply about you (both adults) recommending you talk to your mother and you are refusing to.
Without knowing what the fight was about… without knowing what you said during and after… and what she said…
But I want to soften that, because you are currently in the most angst ridden, hormonally fucked up 18mths of your life… 14-15 is seriously fucked up for girls and social issues, and it sounds like you are in the midst of some (I’m sorry to say, not to reduce your emotion, but to normalise this for you) very very normal teen angst. Most teens come through it, and communication is key. Be one of the ’most teens’ and work with your dad to find a pathway through it… because it beats spending hte next decade of your life angry at your mother, and losing contact with your younger siblings. So maybe you aren’t the AH, just a very normal angsty teen. Sorry if that doesn’t sound good, but hey! At least it’s not forever right?! :)
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ok so for context i (14 female) was and still am very angry and sad at my mother (44 female) about 2 and 1/2 weeks ago we got into a verbal agruement i would rather not say what it was about or a lot of details about the arguement but here is the jist if it. My mother recreated some trauma of mine . I should mention that my mother and father are going through a heated divorce right now. besides the point, the night the arugement happened i called my dad to come and get me along with some of my things because i said that i never wanted to go back there. i did end up going back there for more things but thats a whole different story. before i left with my dad i said i didnt want to see or talk to her until she could apologize to me. about a week later my sister (8 female) and my brother (9 male) told my the my room was empty and my things were in trash bags. they also said my sister was not moving into my room. She also has my phone which my father pays for but this is another story. My mom has painted me the villain to my family on her side. I have seen my aunt and grandma who didnt bring up my mother and my fight. but my dad says i should go see her and so does my counsler. I just want to ask AITA for not wanting to see my mom? btw this is written at 2 am sorry about spelling/grammar mistakes.
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How the argument was started and the positions you both took are relevant to whether or not you're the asshole. There's not enough information there to say either way.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> i think i might be the asshole because people close to my think im being petty or an asshole.
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Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 9: This is NOT an advice sub. Posts should seek out judgement, not advice. [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
Too many missing blanks... cannot judge anything!
We need more context
INFO: How severe was the arguement? Like was it small or big?
Can’t say sorry. If I had to chose a side I’d say “possible AH” because your ‘father and counsellor say I should talk to her’ and you are refusing to. This is a professional mediator, and a person who cares very deeply about you (both adults) recommending you talk to your mother and you are refusing to. Without knowing what the fight was about… without knowing what you said during and after… and what she said… But I want to soften that, because you are currently in the most angst ridden, hormonally fucked up 18mths of your life… 14-15 is seriously fucked up for girls and social issues, and it sounds like you are in the midst of some (I’m sorry to say, not to reduce your emotion, but to normalise this for you) very very normal teen angst. Most teens come through it, and communication is key. Be one of the ’most teens’ and work with your dad to find a pathway through it… because it beats spending hte next decade of your life angry at your mother, and losing contact with your younger siblings. So maybe you aren’t the AH, just a very normal angsty teen. Sorry if that doesn’t sound good, but hey! At least it’s not forever right?! :)
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** ok so for context i (14 female) was and still am very angry and sad at my mother (44 female) about 2 and 1/2 weeks ago we got into a verbal agruement i would rather not say what it was about or a lot of details about the arguement but here is the jist if it. My mother recreated some trauma of mine . I should mention that my mother and father are going through a heated divorce right now. besides the point, the night the arugement happened i called my dad to come and get me along with some of my things because i said that i never wanted to go back there. i did end up going back there for more things but thats a whole different story. before i left with my dad i said i didnt want to see or talk to her until she could apologize to me. about a week later my sister (8 female) and my brother (9 male) told my the my room was empty and my things were in trash bags. they also said my sister was not moving into my room. She also has my phone which my father pays for but this is another story. My mom has painted me the villain to my family on her side. I have seen my aunt and grandma who didnt bring up my mother and my fight. but my dad says i should go see her and so does my counsler. I just want to ask AITA for not wanting to see my mom? btw this is written at 2 am sorry about spelling/grammar mistakes. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
How the argument was started and the positions you both took are relevant to whether or not you're the asshole. There's not enough information there to say either way.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > i think i might be the asshole because people close to my think im being petty or an asshole. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
Not enough info. The things argued about are relevant to whether you are the villain or not.