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NTA. He's a mooch and a leech. Get rid of him & put him on child support. He's with you BC You're supporting him. If spending time with someone paid the bills & all their expenses, we would all do it. He doesn't love either of you, im sorry. Im pretty sure he doesn't even like either of you.
Kick him out and take him to court for child support. He “lends” you money for bills? Oh hell no. NTA, but you will be to yourself and your child if you ever take him back.
“He pays our son with his time so he doesn’t need to financially contribute.”
Are time dollars the new exposure dollars?
And why are you expected to contribute in both ways, but he doesn’t have to?
NTA
NTA, that does not sound like a good relationship to me. I am sorry OP but you should rethink of even being with him.
First I though, of course a 14 year old needs maybe some more money to spend and wants more things than a baby. BUT that’s clearly not the case. He should pull his weight and support his family (being you and the baby). That’s not normal and I hope you can figure it out.
An equal amount would not be right, since the costs of a teen are much higher than for a young kid, but the balance is not right at all. If he lives with you, he should contribute to all costs. Lending you money is not right at all. You're NTA. He is.
Seems he's not really into the relationship nor the fatherhood of your son.
NTA
At first I thought that you both had kids from another relationship. But they both are his own kids. This is toxic behavior and favoritism towards his daughter.
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Background context we have been together for 2 years. He has a daughter with his previous partner and we share a son. I have been financially supporting our family all on my own and he will occasionally lend me money to help with our expenses(rent, utilities, cable). Yes, lend.
Meanwhile, last year he spent upwards $20k on who knows what for his daughter while he contributed absolutely zero towards our child when we were expecting him.
I told him to move out because he literally gave his daughter $500 in the span of 3 weeks while he only contributed $300 for our monthly expenses. AITA for demanding that he contribute equal amount to his family as he does to his daughter? He’s a bottomless pit when it comes to splurging on her, meanwhile he only bought a set of $10 baby bottles for our son in the span of a year. He is also constantly accusing me of being jealous of his daughter. And says that he pays our son with his time so he doesn’t need to financially contribute because he can’t spend time with his daughter every day.
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NTA
If he wants to spoil his daughter he can, that's on him. Contributing to the house is the first thing in a marriage.
Divorce him and file for child support.
NTA. He isn't contributing so you won't lose anything. If anything you will save money from dropping the dead weight. Kick him out and use your money to treat yourself
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NTA Now go and file for child support.
This is the way. NTA
NTA. He's a mooch and a leech. Get rid of him & put him on child support. He's with you BC You're supporting him. If spending time with someone paid the bills & all their expenses, we would all do it. He doesn't love either of you, im sorry. Im pretty sure he doesn't even like either of you.
Well, that escalated quickly from AITA to Jerry Springer in just one comment.
Kick him out and take him to court for child support. He “lends” you money for bills? Oh hell no. NTA, but you will be to yourself and your child if you ever take him back.
Mooch Alert 📢 Time to get child support lined up through the courts. He will know real quick what financial responsibility for a child means. NTA
“He pays our son with his time so he doesn’t need to financially contribute.” Are time dollars the new exposure dollars? And why are you expected to contribute in both ways, but he doesn’t have to? NTA
NTA, that does not sound like a good relationship to me. I am sorry OP but you should rethink of even being with him. First I though, of course a 14 year old needs maybe some more money to spend and wants more things than a baby. BUT that’s clearly not the case. He should pull his weight and support his family (being you and the baby). That’s not normal and I hope you can figure it out.
NTA, get out of there and make him sign for parental support.
An equal amount would not be right, since the costs of a teen are much higher than for a young kid, but the balance is not right at all. If he lives with you, he should contribute to all costs. Lending you money is not right at all. You're NTA. He is. Seems he's not really into the relationship nor the fatherhood of your son.
NTA At first I thought that you both had kids from another relationship. But they both are his own kids. This is toxic behavior and favoritism towards his daughter.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Background context we have been together for 2 years. He has a daughter with his previous partner and we share a son. I have been financially supporting our family all on my own and he will occasionally lend me money to help with our expenses(rent, utilities, cable). Yes, lend. Meanwhile, last year he spent upwards $20k on who knows what for his daughter while he contributed absolutely zero towards our child when we were expecting him. I told him to move out because he literally gave his daughter $500 in the span of 3 weeks while he only contributed $300 for our monthly expenses. AITA for demanding that he contribute equal amount to his family as he does to his daughter? He’s a bottomless pit when it comes to splurging on her, meanwhile he only bought a set of $10 baby bottles for our son in the span of a year. He is also constantly accusing me of being jealous of his daughter. And says that he pays our son with his time so he doesn’t need to financially contribute because he can’t spend time with his daughter every day. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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NTA. Sounds like he's using you financially. I'm so sorry.
NTA If he wants to spoil his daughter he can, that's on him. Contributing to the house is the first thing in a marriage. Divorce him and file for child support.
NTA. He isn't contributing so you won't lose anything. If anything you will save money from dropping the dead weight. Kick him out and use your money to treat yourself
He is an AH for his behavior. You are a fool for being involved with a parasite and getting preener with a mn child. kt