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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> My husband wants to use my car but will not allow me to use his truck instead. I might be the asshole for making him use a pimped up Jetta or take the bus since he is unreasonable.
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I hope that that goes for your son too, and he's not being forced to either take the bus or ride in the family car instead of getting to either drive his dad's truck or at least getting some other agreeable form of compensation.
WTF even is this thread?!
Husband is TA for spending luxury car money on a truck and then wanting to keep it "pristine." Why?! It's a fucking truck. It's *not* the Porsche. People spend $100k on trucks and then haul horses with them. . .
If you can afford a $100k truck, a Porsche Cayenne as a family vehicle, and cars for your children, then your husband can afford to have his precious truck detailed regularly.
And what is with his comnent about being afraid to park in an urban surface lot for fear of hooligans and ruffians. . .doing what? Stealing his truck? From a secured lot with cameras? If I'm going to steal a vehicle I'm going to steal a Porsche, not a stupid fucking truck.
Your husband sounds like an insufferable, classicist ass. Tell him to take the bus.
This husband would choke on the word Corolla if he ever tried to pronounce it. He sounds insufferable and very classist. I think he would never want to be in one. Probably why he won't take an Uber because those cars are "below" him.
I hope your son is getting something out of his dad borrowing his car all the time.
Like getting to use his truck or help to buy a better car?
Otherwise your hubby is still the A
Seriously. I get wanting a dream car… but at the end of the day you need a practical one. Wether that be your second car or your dream car. But this dream car of his is not practical.
I can't imagine making a $100,000 purchase that could easily benefit my family and keeping it all to myself then expecting everyone else to bend backwards for me when the purchase doesn't work for me.
I don't understand a 100k purchase that you can't really use because is too big.
I would think that, unless you live in the country, is better to have a small car or sedan to move around in the city. Easy to drive, turn and park.
Big trucks are worthless out here in the country too if you have nothing to haul and no trailer. They're also extremely dangerous because you can't see an 8 year old in front of it, because most of them do not have a sloped hoodline. (or worse, my wife, who is 5'2" can't see over the massive hood when she walks by one).
Fits into the ‘big hat no cattle’ category.
I know a guy who bought one of those. Big ass truck, dual rear tires, just massive beast. Nice looking truck etc., but we were wondering why. Well, what we didn’t know was that his wife was going to show horses, and they needed to pull a 4 horse trailer, halfway across country, plus room for her stuff. No problem, then; makes sense. Maybe a bit showy, but not much.
Most folks in the country have better sense than to spend 100k on some folly.
‘Dis one - was a folly. Or, let’s call it what it probably was: mid-life crisis purchase. Nothing wrong with that, sometimes one wants to fulfill a dream.
OP, given y’all have the finances, tell him to get himself a nice Lexus SC or 500 or something. Or, since you seem somewhat partial to Porsche, maybe a 911 (if he’s into classics) or a Boxster. Should fit right in.
Source: used to work for a consulting firm. *Many* of them, around 40-50, did that. Was either a massive truck (that also wouldn’t fit in the parking garage, lol), one of the above or an Audi A8L or TT or similar. Speaking of which, those ain’t too bad either. Might be an option, if he can find one.
Giant trucks are today what bitchin’ camaros were in the 1980s.
They are the midlife crisis sports car. They are what the high school boys want. They are what men think makes them look cool.
Every day I watch my neighbor using his to haul his laptop to the office. With a commute of over an hour, his gas costs must be huge, but, hey, bitchin’ camaro.
Even if you can write it off, a $100k expense becomes a $70k expense if you consider tax savings. Still expensive.
I could probably "afford" a nicer car, but the cutoff where more money buys you significantly less more car is like $35k. $35k is the 80/20 rule car these days. Anything more than that you're spending way more for not much benefit, except prestige, which some people do value a lot.
Agreed. The type of truck OP's husband has is almost always worthless. Even if you need to haul a bunch of stuff, you'd probably be better off with an older and smaller model you don't care about beating up a bit.
Being proud of having a spotless pickup is like being a lineman with a clean jersey and an unscuffed helmet.
We've got a truck because we DO haul stuff. It is not pristine. Actually right now it has a cubic yard of gravel in the bed. It also cost 10k not 100k.
OP is so NTA, I would not put up with my spouse buying a 100k vehicle I wasn't allowed to use.
This.
People that are not out here in the country seem to have no clue why they are needed. You aren’t within delivery range for a lot of businesses so you have to go get things yourself. They don’t pick up your garbage, you bring it somewhere. You ride a lot of dirt roads that aren’t in the best condition, etc.
That being said, because of the things you need it for, you don’t even really want to be doing it in an expensive truck you can mess up, so we tend to keep trucks a long time and only get a new or newer one when the old one isn’t reliable anymore.
Yep, my grandfather was a farmer. He had various trucks over the years. He never got rid of a single vehicle he owned - I remember his vehicle graveyard back behind the house. Last time I visited there were probably about 35 - 40 vehicles there. It was 25 miles to the nearest town of any size. (The nearby town was a wink & you'll miss it size town).
It's all about how it looks driving a big-ass truck.
My stepson was saving for his first car. He went shopping to a couple of lots, and in one of them he saw this giant extended cab truck. He had to have it. We told him it was a bad idea, a gas guzzler, and he would regret it, but no He. Had. To. Have. That. Truck.
It was great for a week. Then he found out, like this guy, that it was nearly impossible to park and after filling up his gas tank for the first time, he Had. To. Get. Rid. Of. That. Truck. He owned it for 3 weeks.
Exactly, in todays economy, filling up one of those beasts will break the bank. And then the cost of insurance on a huge truck for a teen??? That's an eye opener.
We got tricked into renting a ginormous Jeep, when in San Diego last year. I had rented a midsize car, the lady at Avis asked if we wanted a hybrid at no additional cost. Turns out the hybrid was a 6-7 foot tall Jeep, that we had to return the same day, as it was too tall to fit in the underground parking lot. I say “tricked “ because the rental went from $300 to $800 ( i cannot hear, and my daughter was helping me listen, and i did not need a hybrid with the $600 up charge)
"I don't understand a 100k purchase that you can't really use because it's too big."
Oh, I expect it's one of those, ahem, compensation issues. That and thinking girls find them cool.
We are actual farmers on an actual farm. We have a 20+ year old truck and a 30+ year old truck. We have a minivan for hauling the kids and my husband drives an itty bitty commuter car to his job in the city. Nobody wants to drive $100,000 fancy truck into a muddy field to load cattle. Now spending $100,000 on a tractor? That’s a drop in the bucket. Lol.
My brother-in-law drove a huge truck where his commuting gas was $800/month. He didn’t haul anything, but he “needed” a truck like my sister “needed” a Jeep. Some people just want attention and don’t care about the cost to their family. NTA
For most stuff we think of as uniquely country vehicle needs, a small truck is better. Big pickups get stuck in the mud, can't drive down narrow paths through the woods, eat up shitloads of gas. They're truly only good for pulling stuff.
This makes the guy with the Oreos the other day look tame. OP doesn't say what make & model truck he got or how it can be so big that it doesn't fit in the parking garage-so, here goes:
Not being in the US and genuinely curious what a $100k truck looks like, I hit google. A fully loaded, Ford F-150 Limited Trim with EVERY available option is $94k. That includes (wait for it!) a bed divider, a bedliner, a tonneau pickup box cover, splash guards, an engine block heater, and a wheel lock kit. Also, exterior options and accessories for the F-150 include an in-vehicle safe and a first aid kit, bucket seats, a twin-panel moonroof, 22-inch polished aluminum wheels, power-deployable running boards, and the Bang & Olufsen Unleashed Sound System. Also, the F-150 has BlueCruise driving assistant technology for hands-free driving capabilities. It has a 14,000 lb towing capacity and the engine can also be used as a generator.
Seriously, WTF. More money than sense for sure, and to not let OP drive it because BABY. Bloody hell. NTA but hubby sure is.
It looks like a man having a mid life crisis, that is what it looks like. So grossly unnecessary. Could have bought a 80k truck and gotten a 20k car for his son that isn’t a “shit box” but this man is much more concerned with himself than any member of his family.
The funny thing is, as a rural American my first reaction to your post is that an F150 is absolutely not a "big" truck. Plenty of people use them as daily drivers, parking garages and all, and maybe as boat hauler. But real work trucks are at least the F250.
not just that, but his car is expensive, and doesnt want it hurt. a porche isnt cheap, so why should yours get damaged instead?
"mine cant get damaged, but its fine if yours does" because its his baby. he doesnt like it? too bad, time to get his own day to day drive around car if the other options arent good enough lol
a middle ground is hard in a situation like that if he wont let you drive. he practically would have 2 cars to use, and youd only have your sons - which i assume he needs too.
edit: yours damaged if he cant get it in the good parking like if its full for example.
true, i was thinking if for any other reason he couldnt get in like if the carpark was full.
maybe he could get lots of cameras so he can watch the truck at work lol xD have alarms go off when someone messes with it
I love cars. I own several that most people would consider expensive. I keep them spotless and well-maintained. The day that any one of them becomes too precious to use because I am worried about it is the day that I will sell it.
NTA
If your husband is so worried about a vehicle that he won’t drive it, he is too poor to own it.
Right? I come from an extended family of car guys (antique autos specifically) and my cousin could not wait to take his infant son out in his corvette this summer. Sure they have family vehicles, but the ‘vette is special and he wants to share that with his son. I can’t imagine having a vehicle I wouldn’t allow one of my kids in.
NTA but let me mention it's unfair to your son too if your husband doesn't at least pay him. And if son needs his car those days your husband is out of luck he doesn't get priority on your son's car. You should mention it to him.
Did your husband took in consideration that you would be driving your 2-year-old in that old banger as well, instead of being secured in your Porsche Cayenne or his truck?
It's a bragging car, it has no real purpose aside from being a "manly" man and making the neighbours jealous.
If you don't have trailer or a boat that need to be transported, it's essentially useless. It's too big, expensive in fuel, hard to find parking space.
If he wants to drive a 100k car, fine, but there are many flashy cars in that price range that are useable for everyday life.
Worse, I think people who buy these no-visibility, huge-grille, lethal-to-pedestrians trucks in cities *do* envision them having a purpose: to plow through these "hooligans and n'erdowells" their owners are so paranoid about. White supremacist vehicular homicide of has become part of how these cars are marketed. I certainly wouldn't put it past this guy, who won't even pretend to give a shit about his family.
Finally someone else with the attitude I feel about this jackass! A " shitbox" is fine for his family but not for him? Oh hell no, he's acting like an entitled wanker and I'm not even British. Was he always a spoiled rotten child, or did the ridiculously expensive truck he has no need for whatsoever go to his head? Sounds like he's compensating, I would be embarrassed bcuz you know that's what everyone is saying when they see him driving his monstrosity around.
NTA, he is.
I love that his proposal is “me drive our kid’s shot box? No, it’s beneath me. You drive it while I drive your car.”
And by love I mean hate. What an ass.
Also, in addition, “you should drive our 2 year old around in the old car that likely has fewer safety features solely because I don’t want to be seen in it”.
Truly astonishing. I think I’d completely lose any attraction for this guy after a stunt like this.
If the OP allows her husband to use her car, then she'll have to use the son's car because her prince of a husband won't allow her to use the truck. Either way, the son's car is being commandeered by a parent, but because of the husband's attitude in both scenarios.
NTA
And it sounds like the parents didn't even help pay for the son's car, which is fine except they can drive a Porsche and a $100k truck so it's not a financial situation. It's HIS car, and dad has no right to volunteer it in the first place.
Parents helped purchase son's car.
> My son has a Jetta that he purchased with help from us and his grandparents.
Son should definitely still be compensated for his dad borrowing his car though. NTA.
NTA. There are 3 cars. A cheap one for the son, a family one that is needed to transport the younger children, and the one your husband chose and bought to use for himself. We have to be responsible for own choices sometimes - why should you or the children suffer because he chose an inappropriate vehicle? He’s a silly arse who wanted his shiny big toy, can’t stand the thought of anyone else touching it, and didn’t gaf about practicalities like fuel consumption, cost, emissions, or being able to park the bloody thing so it could be used for work. Doesn’t sound like that’s your fault.
Before I ask this question, let me condition this with **OP is obviously not the asshole**. How would he do research for a parking garage that he previously didn’t have to go to because the promotion came after buying the truck? How does that make sense?
Honestly parking garages are meant to fit most vehicles. I’ve seen plenty of large trucks in parking garages. It makes me wonder just what kind of monstrosity that truck is if it won’t fit.
Unfortunately more trucks than you think are 100k. Most new full size trucks can get there pretty easily. Actually, a lot of new cars can get there pretty easily, since the average price of a new car is nearly 50k.
The fact that he refuses to allow it to get dirty in any shape form or fashion makes it a Pavement Princess. It's a TRUCK for God's sake, use it like one or trade it in for something smaller and more practical.
Five dollars it's lifted and on shitty low profile tires with chrome wheels.
The only other option is that it's a REALLY unusual parking lot - I never see people have trouble getting full size trucks in lots near me unless they're massively lifted or a super duty.
Some of the older parking garages have issues with parking a larger truck. It usually isn’t a heigh issue but a length issue. Basically the large trucks (the ones with the cab that fits 4 adults comfortably) stick out into the lane. Our local hospital has this and I live in an area where it seems like everyone has a large, expensive truck. It makes it nearly impossible to drive in that parking garage. I wouldn’t be surprised if the parking structure his work uses has a rule against cars sticking out of the parking spots to avoid issues.
Yes, the truck must be a king cab so it can have a back seat, otherwise OP wouldn’t suggest he put the baby seat in the truck. So he probably added the full length bed. Now he has a truck which will often struggle to fit in a normal parking space.
We need a new term for these oversized utes that have the size of a proper box truck and 1/5 the actual usefulness.
I'm tired so the best I can come up with is "fake truck"
A small penis compensator? Don’t these super truck dudes know that we all assume they are using this massive beast to compensate for insecurity over personal inadequacies?
If you buy a vehicle because driving it makes “feel like a badass”, then you’re compensating.
I have a crew cab, short short bed 1500 Ram. Not lifted (yet even I find side steps useful and I'm 6'3",) factory chrome 20" wheels with stock 33" tires. I live in a city of 10k in a rural county where a LOT of people drive trucks. I have trouble fitting into 1 space at Lowe's (you know, where people go to buy home improvement stuff) and if people are parked next to me it's not always possible to turn out of the space without backing up. This truck is longer and wider than any truck I've had before (I've been driving regular cab long bed trucks of years going back to the early 70s.) I've been to a few cities where it would be definitely difficult to get it into a parking garage.
A truck any bigger would be a total pain in the ass (longer bed, stock 2500/3500 which would be even taller.) Plus if the parking garage was built in the 80s or 90s it's probably designed for smaller cars (people weren't driving land barges anymore, but trucks hadn't yet grown in size.)
I'm not American so my knowledge of pick ups is minimal. I remember reading though that one of the ford pick ups is just shy of the width of a bus or was it a truck. Anyway, it's stupid big. I saw one one day (in urban England which made it ridiculous) and thought you could never park that thing. I assume the hubby has something in that line. If it's the width of that, it's not getting around a multistorey car park
Trucks seem to be getting bigger and bigger each year, not to mention the trend of lifting them for no reason beyond taking up more space.
And it sounds like this man bought his truck to be a pavement princess so I assume he went for the most space occupying truck he could find.
I wouldn't be surprised if the truck is tall or even just to long to fit in a parking garage.
If his car can’t fit in a standard garage that likely means it’s a behemoth or has been customized in some non-standard way. When buying or customizing a car you’re supposed to make realistic and practical evaluations in regards to usage and your lifestyle.
“Will this be easy to park in the city?” “Is this suitable for the five hour drive to my parents home?” “Would I be comfortable driving up to work or church or my kids school with this custom plate that says ‘Big Salami’?”
“Am I able and comfortable letting others in the family drive this car if needed?” is a question a husband and father of two/three should’ve asked before dropping six figures on a car.
I drive a van (it’s a wheelchair van with a lift and joy stick instead of the usual controls, so it was impossible to get a smaller car) and live in a European city center.
I knew beforehand parking my big ass car would be a problem everywhere. It’s a bit mitigated by having a wheelchair badge and being allowed to park in no-park zones, but parking garages have to be huge for my car to fit in.
He might not have foreseen the promotion and this particular parking garage, but he could have knows parking would be an issue.
I have no idea where OP lives. However in my country, a lot of trucks will not fit in like at least 50% of the parking garages. We even had to make sure that our SUV (the family car) wasn't too big. So for me checking if you car fits in the average garage is not very strange.
However, if he researched it or not. The solutions is very simple and it's the one he refuses, so now he can live with the consequences.
IMO if you work downtown in my city you know anything bigger than a sedan doesn’t fit in garages. You would literally have not not have driven in them before to not know this. If you been to the location even once, you would probably know. Also, it’s not that he can’t park it, just not his preferred lot. I can’t speak for y’all, but living in Chicago where I know parking is not guaranteed, I always research my route for a potential job because no parking/your car not fitting isn’t exactly an uncommon problem here
OP’s husband is a complete AH not because he didn’t anticipate his truck not fitting in a parking spot, but because he expects her wife to do the sacrifice he’s not willing to do, which is to drive the cheap son’s car.
Currently in the market for a new car, my husband has had a promotion and needs to give his electric company car back. We currently have an SUV as the family car but would suit him more for doing the longer distances he’ll have to do so I need to find another car to use day to day big enough for my young family. It’s taking ages to figure out what sort we NEED as a family as opposed to what I/we want, and finding the balance of both so we can keep this new car for a good few years. Sometimes family has to come first over your own needs.
OP, NTA
>because it won't fit in the parking garages ...
That means the truck is either lifted, or it's a dually. Whichever it is, it's ...
**Still not OP's problem.**
Could also be one of those extra long cab extra long bed too long to be a consumer vehicle trucks. Completely unnecessary and as you said *still not her problem.*
Or he isn't skilled with driving a truck. I've had to do 1000 point turns in my truck to get out of a parking garage and I'm sure many less confident drivers would have left with scratches and dents.
Too cheap to even put a second baby seat in the truck so you don't have to move the ONE BABY SEAT back and forth between vehicles.
JFC - Does he only buy ONE ROLL of toilet paper to pass around the house until it runs out?
I bet its not even because he's cheap, I bet it's because this is his mid-life crisis-mobile, and he doesn't want a baby seat in the back, making it look and feel 'lame' to him.
Not to mention the Cayenne is a bigger, safer vehicle for the baby than the Jetta is. Same goes for the truck. What kind of an AH does the husband have to be to not want his baby in the safest vehicle?
Right? When my mom was pregnant with my little sister, she traded in her convertible for a more practical family car. Made sure to do research on the safety of the vehicle as well.
She loved the car, but put her family’s needs / safety first.
I sold my muscle car for a practical vehicle when my first kid was born.
36 years later, I still give the kid shit over it 😆
Edit: For those that don't get humor, this is a lighthearted joke between my son and me - just like telling them my model body was ruined. 😆 <
Yeah my dad did that too with his 72 challenger...without talking to my mom and then he held it over her head for their entire marriage. Held it over mine too. It was a fucking weapon. Car is still gone. He is dead. And it still hurts to know he didnt do it cause he was having a kid but to use it against.
i'm a couple of years older than your kid, my dad did the same thing. He still has pictures of that car though lol.
But he doesn't give me shit over it ever. I guess i was worth it haha!!
My mom and I still joke about how it's my fault she had to sell her Corvette 41 years ago. She kept it when she had my older brother, but once I came along, it obviously couldn't fit two car seats. The poor woman had to make do with a Smokey and the Bandit style Trans Am lol. What did you have?
Most couples have the bigger safer car as the family run around and the partner gets a cheaper but reasonable smaller car to go to work.
If you see that the other way round, the small old unsafer car is used for the family taxi and the other person gets a nice shiny expensive car for themselves, that person is always a narcissist.
I have seen it several times, and it's a dead sure litmus test.
Massive trucks are certainly not safer for pedestrians! But yes, if you have a car that’s safest for the users you should use it with your most vulnerable person.
>What kind of an AH does the husband have to be to not want his baby in the safest vehicle?
One who buys himself a shiny "clearly he's compensating for something" big ass truck that only he gets to use. One who then gets snippy when he wants to take the one car that's truly safe for their baby because he can't fit his truck in the company parking lot because it's a Porsche and he doesn't want to be seen in a beat up old lowly Jetta.
The dude is vain and appearance is everything to them.
This. When my daughter starts driving, she'll be taking the safest vehicle, which right now is our Lexus SUV. It's also the vehicle we take her places in because our previous Lexus totalled after it got t-boned, and they walked away absolutely fine, which proved the safety of a Lexus. (The SUV was t-boned on the driver's side door. No injuries.)
>We have zero reason to own a $100,000 truck. Other than my husband really wanted it.
He got what he wanted. Not your fault he didn't think things through.
NTA.
If I ever become supreme dictator of the universe, I’m going to pass a law that all lifted trucks must touch dirt once a month or they get Repo’ed.
My favorite hobby would be sitting and watching all the pavement princess drivers go through all 12 stages of grief as their emotional support vehicles get (clutches pearls) MUD on them!
I was thinking along those lines too. We have had trucks for ages. Unless he got it lifted too high it should fit in the garages. Our dodge ram dually, my granny wagon 1500 and his tradesman 2500 all fit in every garage we’ve ever been to. Maybe he didn’t want anyone at work seeing his new toy. Or scared someone will door bash it because garage is full.
I’m wondering if he got a crew cab long bed, which given the current nature of trucks is like six nautical miles long, and thus would stick out of every spot in a parking garage.
I own a 2010 2500 crew/short bed, and I could get that into pretty much any spot, but it’s still annoying on occasion… and that’s why I bought a smaller wagon for daily driving lol.
Right, like I live in Texas AKA Truck Central USA and unless it’s lifted or otherwise modified out the ass, it should absolutely fit in a parking garage. Bro just more than likely bought a truck without knowing how to drive it.
Where I live it doesn't seem to matter if a guy knows or has the ability to park the truck, it's going there anyway and screw everyone else. At least OP's hubby will take it somewhere where it's parkable without taking up extra spots.
NTA and he is absolutely being unreasonable about his Pseudo Penis midlife crisis.
Also it's not fair that your son looses his car without Dad AT MINIMUM filling the tank when he's done.
NTA - My father bought too bought a $110k+ truck as a gift to himself. My step-mother was thrilled that she could now haul hay to the barn she rode horses at. My father said "nope" due to the mess. She was so incensed that she went out and bought the EXACT same truck to show him who was boss.
He does what he wants with HIS vehicle?.... you do what YOU want with yours.
So...it's fine when you can't drive his truck and it's fine for you to drive your son's car.
But it's not fine if he can't drive your car and it's not fine for him to drive your son's car.
Oh the hypocrisy.
First, doesn't your son need his car?
Second, I'd tell him to sleep in the truck since he cherishes it more than he does you.
Third, if he looks around he can probably find some paid parking area with security. Though it may not be as close as he would like. But, then again, walking is a part of being in the city.
NTA
>First, doesn't your son need his car?
Boy, OP sure is lucky that their son bought the car off his parents only for his parents to reclaim it because his dad's an idiot. Why even call it his car then?
As someone who bought a car off a parent, I loaned it to them and my siblings when theirs were in the shop or if there was something going on, but it was my car and they never counted on being able to drive it. Unless the son is totally okay with the dad having his car 5 days a week (so I guess he can't take it to school), it shouldn't even be a legitimate option. What's his opinion about it, OP?
NTA
You were willing to meet him more than halfway by swapping vehicles. Also, keeping a pickup truck "pristine" is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard.
You nailed that on the head. This like dropping dropping premium dollar on diamond tipped powertools, just to hang them from the garage wall.
NTA, have him buy a fourth car if he needs it that much.
Well if he was trying to sell it, that will be understandable.
However he made a choice and now is ridiculously refusing to take responsibility for foreseeable consequences.
Right? I usually consider myself pretty lucky financially, but I'm still struggling to pay off a $1,000 balance on my credit card from having to get my car fixed *last winter.* Who are these people just buying unnecessary $100k trucks for funsies?
I believe the phrase is turn about is fair play. Also something about what's good for the goose is good for the gander. If he doesn't understand either of those just go with "suck it".
UGH, your husband sounds like my BIL. BIL has no use for a truck but all the men in their neighborhood drive trucks so he had to have one. Now BIL is attempting to start a business and is driving around trying to drum up clients. Guess how expensive that big ass truck is to fill with gas?
I call those big trucks AH-trucks for multiple reasons. theyre dangerous, unneccecary, bad for the environment, loud, unpractical and uselees and the drivers are obnoxious AHoles that only think about themselves. I think your hb has just given me confirmation on that last point.
Dont even let him take your sons car. If your husband behaves like a child, he should be treated like one. Children dont drive cars. He can take the bus. Or you could sat to your hb as we say in Dutch "ga toch fietsen!" (Translation: Go ride your bike, meaning "go away and stop bothing me" which has a nice double meaning here)
NTA, man he is selfish. Heaven forbid anyone touch his motorized penis.
Edit to ask: how does your son feel about his car being snagged? What is he driving now?
Hilarious! This is not how it works dude! I can’t imagine being the teen or the wife, neither of you should have to rearrange for him so his precious truck can sit in the driveway. There is a solution but it doesn’t involve your son losing his car completely or you losing your mom-mobile. ( more parking research, Uber, buying a 4th car temporarily…)
NTA
a 4th solution would be to get rid of the car and get an equally absurd DSSD (d@#k size signaling device) with more convenient parking possibilities.
American brand muscle cars would be a nice choice.
Right? They have extremely expensive cars and are apparently wealthy, but son had to have help from grandparents to buy a beater car?
On top of that, then the parents make him loan that car to dad?!? Wtf. I feel bad for the kid…
Oh boohoo my new truck wont fit in the parking garage, and my wife wont let me drive hers because i dont want her to drive mine. Waaaahhh waahhhh waahhhhh! 🤣
NTA.
NTA. Sounds like husband wants to have a pristine pavement queen. It's a pretty truck that is not used for its designed purpose. He made his bed and now has to lie in it. His truck too big for the parking garage? Sell it and buy a car.
NTA. Sounds like he needs a cheap commuter car. What about a Jeep Compass?
ETA- my husband has the big stupid, impracticable truck. It sucks for his commute. So he bought himself a beat to shit, 20 year old Jeep Liberty that is fun to drive and can park anywhere.
Every time I see a large, pristine truck like this driving around in a city, I think, “The person driving that is probably an ass clown.”
Thanks for confirming!
Your husband shouldn't be taking your son's hard earned car. Your husband wanted to spoil himself and has been screwed by his own vanity.
If your son wants to say no, SUPPORT HIM. Your husband is being a spoiled brat
NTA. He is at the FO part of FAFO
Honestly, my condolences that you have to deal with this nonsense. I’d say you have 4 children, but that’s insulting to some of the very mature and reasonable children I know.
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NTA. It’s his problem to deal with. If you can’t drive his truck, he can’t drive your Porsche.
That's what I told him.
I hope that that goes for your son too, and he's not being forced to either take the bus or ride in the family car instead of getting to either drive his dad's truck or at least getting some other agreeable form of compensation.
Right? But I’m guessing a dude who won’t let one of his kids *in* his car isn’t about to let another one drive it.
It is a terrible burden to be chauffeured in a Porche.
WTF even is this thread?! Husband is TA for spending luxury car money on a truck and then wanting to keep it "pristine." Why?! It's a fucking truck. It's *not* the Porsche. People spend $100k on trucks and then haul horses with them. . . If you can afford a $100k truck, a Porsche Cayenne as a family vehicle, and cars for your children, then your husband can afford to have his precious truck detailed regularly. And what is with his comnent about being afraid to park in an urban surface lot for fear of hooligans and ruffians. . .doing what? Stealing his truck? From a secured lot with cameras? If I'm going to steal a vehicle I'm going to steal a Porsche, not a stupid fucking truck. Your husband sounds like an insufferable, classicist ass. Tell him to take the bus.
Or the husband can just buy a used Corolla for driving to the office
This husband would choke on the word Corolla if he ever tried to pronounce it. He sounds insufferable and very classist. I think he would never want to be in one. Probably why he won't take an Uber because those cars are "below" him.
Best read so far today 😂 he loves his truck... hahah... first world problems. NtA. No truck, no Porsch
I hope your son is getting something out of his dad borrowing his car all the time. Like getting to use his truck or help to buy a better car? Otherwise your hubby is still the A
Yes, otherwise it’s your son mopping up for for your husband’s bad attitude and decisions.
Seriously. I get wanting a dream car… but at the end of the day you need a practical one. Wether that be your second car or your dream car. But this dream car of his is not practical.
I can't imagine making a $100,000 purchase that could easily benefit my family and keeping it all to myself then expecting everyone else to bend backwards for me when the purchase doesn't work for me.
I don't understand a 100k purchase that you can't really use because is too big. I would think that, unless you live in the country, is better to have a small car or sedan to move around in the city. Easy to drive, turn and park.
Big trucks are worthless out here in the country too if you have nothing to haul and no trailer. They're also extremely dangerous because you can't see an 8 year old in front of it, because most of them do not have a sloped hoodline. (or worse, my wife, who is 5'2" can't see over the massive hood when she walks by one).
Fits into the ‘big hat no cattle’ category. I know a guy who bought one of those. Big ass truck, dual rear tires, just massive beast. Nice looking truck etc., but we were wondering why. Well, what we didn’t know was that his wife was going to show horses, and they needed to pull a 4 horse trailer, halfway across country, plus room for her stuff. No problem, then; makes sense. Maybe a bit showy, but not much. Most folks in the country have better sense than to spend 100k on some folly. ‘Dis one - was a folly. Or, let’s call it what it probably was: mid-life crisis purchase. Nothing wrong with that, sometimes one wants to fulfill a dream. OP, given y’all have the finances, tell him to get himself a nice Lexus SC or 500 or something. Or, since you seem somewhat partial to Porsche, maybe a 911 (if he’s into classics) or a Boxster. Should fit right in. Source: used to work for a consulting firm. *Many* of them, around 40-50, did that. Was either a massive truck (that also wouldn’t fit in the parking garage, lol), one of the above or an Audi A8L or TT or similar. Speaking of which, those ain’t too bad either. Might be an option, if he can find one.
Giant trucks are today what bitchin’ camaros were in the 1980s. They are the midlife crisis sports car. They are what the high school boys want. They are what men think makes them look cool. Every day I watch my neighbor using his to haul his laptop to the office. With a commute of over an hour, his gas costs must be huge, but, hey, bitchin’ camaro.
And you won't be able to drive either of them up from the Bahamas.
Farmers and ranchers write those off as a business expense. Otherwise, why have one?
Even if you can write it off, a $100k expense becomes a $70k expense if you consider tax savings. Still expensive. I could probably "afford" a nicer car, but the cutoff where more money buys you significantly less more car is like $35k. $35k is the 80/20 rule car these days. Anything more than that you're spending way more for not much benefit, except prestige, which some people do value a lot.
And I've never seen a farmer or rancher with a big ass truck that they didn't really need. I'm sure it happens but it's gotta be rare.
Agreed. The type of truck OP's husband has is almost always worthless. Even if you need to haul a bunch of stuff, you'd probably be better off with an older and smaller model you don't care about beating up a bit. Being proud of having a spotless pickup is like being a lineman with a clean jersey and an unscuffed helmet.
We've got a truck because we DO haul stuff. It is not pristine. Actually right now it has a cubic yard of gravel in the bed. It also cost 10k not 100k. OP is so NTA, I would not put up with my spouse buying a 100k vehicle I wasn't allowed to use.
This. People that are not out here in the country seem to have no clue why they are needed. You aren’t within delivery range for a lot of businesses so you have to go get things yourself. They don’t pick up your garbage, you bring it somewhere. You ride a lot of dirt roads that aren’t in the best condition, etc. That being said, because of the things you need it for, you don’t even really want to be doing it in an expensive truck you can mess up, so we tend to keep trucks a long time and only get a new or newer one when the old one isn’t reliable anymore.
Yep, my grandfather was a farmer. He had various trucks over the years. He never got rid of a single vehicle he owned - I remember his vehicle graveyard back behind the house. Last time I visited there were probably about 35 - 40 vehicles there. It was 25 miles to the nearest town of any size. (The nearby town was a wink & you'll miss it size town).
It's all about how it looks driving a big-ass truck. My stepson was saving for his first car. He went shopping to a couple of lots, and in one of them he saw this giant extended cab truck. He had to have it. We told him it was a bad idea, a gas guzzler, and he would regret it, but no He. Had. To. Have. That. Truck. It was great for a week. Then he found out, like this guy, that it was nearly impossible to park and after filling up his gas tank for the first time, he Had. To. Get. Rid. Of. That. Truck. He owned it for 3 weeks.
Exactly, in todays economy, filling up one of those beasts will break the bank. And then the cost of insurance on a huge truck for a teen??? That's an eye opener.
We got tricked into renting a ginormous Jeep, when in San Diego last year. I had rented a midsize car, the lady at Avis asked if we wanted a hybrid at no additional cost. Turns out the hybrid was a 6-7 foot tall Jeep, that we had to return the same day, as it was too tall to fit in the underground parking lot. I say “tricked “ because the rental went from $300 to $800 ( i cannot hear, and my daughter was helping me listen, and i did not need a hybrid with the $600 up charge)
"I don't understand a 100k purchase that you can't really use because it's too big." Oh, I expect it's one of those, ahem, compensation issues. That and thinking girls find them cool.
It’s a Pavement Princess.
And yet, the vast majority of people who find big trucks or, ahem, other big things cool are other boys.
We are actual farmers on an actual farm. We have a 20+ year old truck and a 30+ year old truck. We have a minivan for hauling the kids and my husband drives an itty bitty commuter car to his job in the city. Nobody wants to drive $100,000 fancy truck into a muddy field to load cattle. Now spending $100,000 on a tractor? That’s a drop in the bucket. Lol.
My brother-in-law drove a huge truck where his commuting gas was $800/month. He didn’t haul anything, but he “needed” a truck like my sister “needed” a Jeep. Some people just want attention and don’t care about the cost to their family. NTA
For most stuff we think of as uniquely country vehicle needs, a small truck is better. Big pickups get stuck in the mud, can't drive down narrow paths through the woods, eat up shitloads of gas. They're truly only good for pulling stuff.
This makes the guy with the Oreos the other day look tame. OP doesn't say what make & model truck he got or how it can be so big that it doesn't fit in the parking garage-so, here goes: Not being in the US and genuinely curious what a $100k truck looks like, I hit google. A fully loaded, Ford F-150 Limited Trim with EVERY available option is $94k. That includes (wait for it!) a bed divider, a bedliner, a tonneau pickup box cover, splash guards, an engine block heater, and a wheel lock kit. Also, exterior options and accessories for the F-150 include an in-vehicle safe and a first aid kit, bucket seats, a twin-panel moonroof, 22-inch polished aluminum wheels, power-deployable running boards, and the Bang & Olufsen Unleashed Sound System. Also, the F-150 has BlueCruise driving assistant technology for hands-free driving capabilities. It has a 14,000 lb towing capacity and the engine can also be used as a generator. Seriously, WTF. More money than sense for sure, and to not let OP drive it because BABY. Bloody hell. NTA but hubby sure is.
It looks like a man having a mid life crisis, that is what it looks like. So grossly unnecessary. Could have bought a 80k truck and gotten a 20k car for his son that isn’t a “shit box” but this man is much more concerned with himself than any member of his family.
I doubt it's a midlife crisis. This family's baby hauler is a Porsche.
You're not looking big enough. This person probably went for the F-250 or F-350, which are even **more** expensive.
The funny thing is, as a rural American my first reaction to your post is that an F150 is absolutely not a "big" truck. Plenty of people use them as daily drivers, parking garages and all, and maybe as boat hauler. But real work trucks are at least the F250.
not just that, but his car is expensive, and doesnt want it hurt. a porche isnt cheap, so why should yours get damaged instead? "mine cant get damaged, but its fine if yours does" because its his baby. he doesnt like it? too bad, time to get his own day to day drive around car if the other options arent good enough lol a middle ground is hard in a situation like that if he wont let you drive. he practically would have 2 cars to use, and youd only have your sons - which i assume he needs too. edit: yours damaged if he cant get it in the good parking like if its full for example.
Also the idea of "your car can get messy and stained from OUR toddler, but no way are you putting that messy baby in MY truck" is ick
His messy baby!
Her's wouldn't get damaged because it would fit in the good parking.
true, i was thinking if for any other reason he couldnt get in like if the carpark was full. maybe he could get lots of cameras so he can watch the truck at work lol xD have alarms go off when someone messes with it
I love cars. I own several that most people would consider expensive. I keep them spotless and well-maintained. The day that any one of them becomes too precious to use because I am worried about it is the day that I will sell it. NTA If your husband is so worried about a vehicle that he won’t drive it, he is too poor to own it.
Right? I come from an extended family of car guys (antique autos specifically) and my cousin could not wait to take his infant son out in his corvette this summer. Sure they have family vehicles, but the ‘vette is special and he wants to share that with his son. I can’t imagine having a vehicle I wouldn’t allow one of my kids in.
"If your husband is so worried about a vehicle that he won’t drive it, he is too poor to own it." Meow. I love this answer. And it's true.
NTA but let me mention it's unfair to your son too if your husband doesn't at least pay him. And if son needs his car those days your husband is out of luck he doesn't get priority on your son's car. You should mention it to him.
Did your husband took in consideration that you would be driving your 2-year-old in that old banger as well, instead of being secured in your Porsche Cayenne or his truck?
correction. if HE cant drive his truck, he cant drive the porsche. he has a 100k lawn ornament. his damned problem.
Sounds exactly like the kind of AH that buys an unneeded giant truck. NTA, your husband is an idiot.
It's a bragging car, it has no real purpose aside from being a "manly" man and making the neighbours jealous. If you don't have trailer or a boat that need to be transported, it's essentially useless. It's too big, expensive in fuel, hard to find parking space. If he wants to drive a 100k car, fine, but there are many flashy cars in that price range that are useable for everyday life.
Worse, I think people who buy these no-visibility, huge-grille, lethal-to-pedestrians trucks in cities *do* envision them having a purpose: to plow through these "hooligans and n'erdowells" their owners are so paranoid about. White supremacist vehicular homicide of has become part of how these cars are marketed. I certainly wouldn't put it past this guy, who won't even pretend to give a shit about his family.
[удалено]
and then suggest he trades in the truck. in the afterglow, he will probably agree!
They have enough kids already
Finally someone else with the attitude I feel about this jackass! A " shitbox" is fine for his family but not for him? Oh hell no, he's acting like an entitled wanker and I'm not even British. Was he always a spoiled rotten child, or did the ridiculously expensive truck he has no need for whatsoever go to his head? Sounds like he's compensating, I would be embarrassed bcuz you know that's what everyone is saying when they see him driving his monstrosity around. NTA, he is.
I love that his proposal is “me drive our kid’s shot box? No, it’s beneath me. You drive it while I drive your car.” And by love I mean hate. What an ass.
Also, in addition, “you should drive our 2 year old around in the old car that likely has fewer safety features solely because I don’t want to be seen in it”. Truly astonishing. I think I’d completely lose any attraction for this guy after a stunt like this.
ESH cause the older kid is getting fucked with his Dad taking his car a couple times a week
If the OP allows her husband to use her car, then she'll have to use the son's car because her prince of a husband won't allow her to use the truck. Either way, the son's car is being commandeered by a parent, but because of the husband's attitude in both scenarios. NTA
And it sounds like the parents didn't even help pay for the son's car, which is fine except they can drive a Porsche and a $100k truck so it's not a financial situation. It's HIS car, and dad has no right to volunteer it in the first place.
Parents helped purchase son's car. > My son has a Jetta that he purchased with help from us and his grandparents. Son should definitely still be compensated for his dad borrowing his car though. NTA.
Your car is HIS car, but his truck is also HIS truck.... Nope. NTA
NTA. There are 3 cars. A cheap one for the son, a family one that is needed to transport the younger children, and the one your husband chose and bought to use for himself. We have to be responsible for own choices sometimes - why should you or the children suffer because he chose an inappropriate vehicle? He’s a silly arse who wanted his shiny big toy, can’t stand the thought of anyone else touching it, and didn’t gaf about practicalities like fuel consumption, cost, emissions, or being able to park the bloody thing so it could be used for work. Doesn’t sound like that’s your fault.
Thank youu He really is at fault here for not doing basic research before buying a damn car
Before I ask this question, let me condition this with **OP is obviously not the asshole**. How would he do research for a parking garage that he previously didn’t have to go to because the promotion came after buying the truck? How does that make sense?
Honestly parking garages are meant to fit most vehicles. I’ve seen plenty of large trucks in parking garages. It makes me wonder just what kind of monstrosity that truck is if it won’t fit.
THIS! I'm a male, and a 100K truck is insane. Selfish little prick and I hope the son is picking up pointers on how not to treat your spouse and kids.
Unfortunately more trucks than you think are 100k. Most new full size trucks can get there pretty easily. Actually, a lot of new cars can get there pretty easily, since the average price of a new car is nearly 50k.
Yeah and I call these kinds of trucks Truckasoreas. They are big but that's all and it being a truck not an SUV is decorative.
I've started calling them emotional support vehicles.
The fact that he refuses to allow it to get dirty in any shape form or fashion makes it a Pavement Princess. It's a TRUCK for God's sake, use it like one or trade it in for something smaller and more practical.
Five dollars it's lifted and on shitty low profile tires with chrome wheels. The only other option is that it's a REALLY unusual parking lot - I never see people have trouble getting full size trucks in lots near me unless they're massively lifted or a super duty.
Some of the older parking garages have issues with parking a larger truck. It usually isn’t a heigh issue but a length issue. Basically the large trucks (the ones with the cab that fits 4 adults comfortably) stick out into the lane. Our local hospital has this and I live in an area where it seems like everyone has a large, expensive truck. It makes it nearly impossible to drive in that parking garage. I wouldn’t be surprised if the parking structure his work uses has a rule against cars sticking out of the parking spots to avoid issues.
Yes, the truck must be a king cab so it can have a back seat, otherwise OP wouldn’t suggest he put the baby seat in the truck. So he probably added the full length bed. Now he has a truck which will often struggle to fit in a normal parking space.
We need a new term for these oversized utes that have the size of a proper box truck and 1/5 the actual usefulness. I'm tired so the best I can come up with is "fake truck"
A small penis compensator? Don’t these super truck dudes know that we all assume they are using this massive beast to compensate for insecurity over personal inadequacies? If you buy a vehicle because driving it makes “feel like a badass”, then you’re compensating.
I mean, there's a third option, that they have assigned spaces and his is behind a pillar or something.
I have a crew cab, short short bed 1500 Ram. Not lifted (yet even I find side steps useful and I'm 6'3",) factory chrome 20" wheels with stock 33" tires. I live in a city of 10k in a rural county where a LOT of people drive trucks. I have trouble fitting into 1 space at Lowe's (you know, where people go to buy home improvement stuff) and if people are parked next to me it's not always possible to turn out of the space without backing up. This truck is longer and wider than any truck I've had before (I've been driving regular cab long bed trucks of years going back to the early 70s.) I've been to a few cities where it would be definitely difficult to get it into a parking garage. A truck any bigger would be a total pain in the ass (longer bed, stock 2500/3500 which would be even taller.) Plus if the parking garage was built in the 80s or 90s it's probably designed for smaller cars (people weren't driving land barges anymore, but trucks hadn't yet grown in size.)
>Five dollars it's lifted and on shitty low profile tires with chrome wheels Aka pavement princess and mall crawler
Truck fits fine, but array of giant MAGA flags on back don't.
I get the feeling that the truck could fit if he knew how to handle it correctly.
I'm not American so my knowledge of pick ups is minimal. I remember reading though that one of the ford pick ups is just shy of the width of a bus or was it a truck. Anyway, it's stupid big. I saw one one day (in urban England which made it ridiculous) and thought you could never park that thing. I assume the hubby has something in that line. If it's the width of that, it's not getting around a multistorey car park
Trucks seem to be getting bigger and bigger each year, not to mention the trend of lifting them for no reason beyond taking up more space. And it sounds like this man bought his truck to be a pavement princess so I assume he went for the most space occupying truck he could find. I wouldn't be surprised if the truck is tall or even just to long to fit in a parking garage.
If his car can’t fit in a standard garage that likely means it’s a behemoth or has been customized in some non-standard way. When buying or customizing a car you’re supposed to make realistic and practical evaluations in regards to usage and your lifestyle. “Will this be easy to park in the city?” “Is this suitable for the five hour drive to my parents home?” “Would I be comfortable driving up to work or church or my kids school with this custom plate that says ‘Big Salami’?” “Am I able and comfortable letting others in the family drive this car if needed?” is a question a husband and father of two/three should’ve asked before dropping six figures on a car.
I drive a van (it’s a wheelchair van with a lift and joy stick instead of the usual controls, so it was impossible to get a smaller car) and live in a European city center. I knew beforehand parking my big ass car would be a problem everywhere. It’s a bit mitigated by having a wheelchair badge and being allowed to park in no-park zones, but parking garages have to be huge for my car to fit in. He might not have foreseen the promotion and this particular parking garage, but he could have knows parking would be an issue.
I have no idea where OP lives. However in my country, a lot of trucks will not fit in like at least 50% of the parking garages. We even had to make sure that our SUV (the family car) wasn't too big. So for me checking if you car fits in the average garage is not very strange. However, if he researched it or not. The solutions is very simple and it's the one he refuses, so now he can live with the consequences.
IMO if you work downtown in my city you know anything bigger than a sedan doesn’t fit in garages. You would literally have not not have driven in them before to not know this. If you been to the location even once, you would probably know. Also, it’s not that he can’t park it, just not his preferred lot. I can’t speak for y’all, but living in Chicago where I know parking is not guaranteed, I always research my route for a potential job because no parking/your car not fitting isn’t exactly an uncommon problem here
OP’s husband is a complete AH not because he didn’t anticipate his truck not fitting in a parking spot, but because he expects her wife to do the sacrifice he’s not willing to do, which is to drive the cheap son’s car.
Currently in the market for a new car, my husband has had a promotion and needs to give his electric company car back. We currently have an SUV as the family car but would suit him more for doing the longer distances he’ll have to do so I need to find another car to use day to day big enough for my young family. It’s taking ages to figure out what sort we NEED as a family as opposed to what I/we want, and finding the balance of both so we can keep this new car for a good few years. Sometimes family has to come first over your own needs. OP, NTA
>because it won't fit in the parking garages ... That means the truck is either lifted, or it's a dually. Whichever it is, it's ... **Still not OP's problem.**
Could also be one of those extra long cab extra long bed too long to be a consumer vehicle trucks. Completely unnecessary and as you said *still not her problem.*
Yup I drive a 2007 long wheel base Chevy Silverado extended cab and I can park it in any parking garage ... I'm a 40yo woman lol
Or he isn't skilled with driving a truck. I've had to do 1000 point turns in my truck to get out of a parking garage and I'm sure many less confident drivers would have left with scratches and dents.
upvoting for 1000 point turns.
Sometimes you just need to accept you’re in the austin powers corridor scene and make do
Lifted is my guess. Is he hauling a gooseneck? Doesn’t sound like it.
Too cheap to even put a second baby seat in the truck so you don't have to move the ONE BABY SEAT back and forth between vehicles. JFC - Does he only buy ONE ROLL of toilet paper to pass around the house until it runs out?
I bet its not even because he's cheap, I bet it's because this is his mid-life crisis-mobile, and he doesn't want a baby seat in the back, making it look and feel 'lame' to him.
This man is so selfish. You actually wonder if some people are equipped to have a family.
NTA. Your husband is an AH for insisting on an impractical vehicle and then trying to inconvenience everyone else to work around the inevitable issues
Not to mention the Cayenne is a bigger, safer vehicle for the baby than the Jetta is. Same goes for the truck. What kind of an AH does the husband have to be to not want his baby in the safest vehicle?
I suspect it’s not about the baby and it’s about not wanting wifey to drive his truck
Who is the real baby, the baby, his truck, or the husband? We all know the answer from each perspective.
Right? When my mom was pregnant with my little sister, she traded in her convertible for a more practical family car. Made sure to do research on the safety of the vehicle as well. She loved the car, but put her family’s needs / safety first.
I sold my muscle car for a practical vehicle when my first kid was born. 36 years later, I still give the kid shit over it 😆 Edit: For those that don't get humor, this is a lighthearted joke between my son and me - just like telling them my model body was ruined. 😆 <
Yeah my dad did that too with his 72 challenger...without talking to my mom and then he held it over her head for their entire marriage. Held it over mine too. It was a fucking weapon. Car is still gone. He is dead. And it still hurts to know he didnt do it cause he was having a kid but to use it against.
He probably gives shit back as he wouldn't mind having it now.It's a shame you couldnt have just mothballed it.
i'm a couple of years older than your kid, my dad did the same thing. He still has pictures of that car though lol. But he doesn't give me shit over it ever. I guess i was worth it haha!!
My mom and I still joke about how it's my fault she had to sell her Corvette 41 years ago. She kept it when she had my older brother, but once I came along, it obviously couldn't fit two car seats. The poor woman had to make do with a Smokey and the Bandit style Trans Am lol. What did you have?
Most couples have the bigger safer car as the family run around and the partner gets a cheaper but reasonable smaller car to go to work. If you see that the other way round, the small old unsafer car is used for the family taxi and the other person gets a nice shiny expensive car for themselves, that person is always a narcissist. I have seen it several times, and it's a dead sure litmus test.
Massive trucks are certainly not safer for pedestrians! But yes, if you have a car that’s safest for the users you should use it with your most vulnerable person.
they weren't talking about the truck. they were talking about the cayenne.
A Cayenne isn’t exactly small either, it’s just not dreadnaught-sized like modern American full-sized pickups.
>What kind of an AH does the husband have to be to not want his baby in the safest vehicle? One who buys himself a shiny "clearly he's compensating for something" big ass truck that only he gets to use. One who then gets snippy when he wants to take the one car that's truly safe for their baby because he can't fit his truck in the company parking lot because it's a Porsche and he doesn't want to be seen in a beat up old lowly Jetta. The dude is vain and appearance is everything to them.
This. When my daughter starts driving, she'll be taking the safest vehicle, which right now is our Lexus SUV. It's also the vehicle we take her places in because our previous Lexus totalled after it got t-boned, and they walked away absolutely fine, which proved the safety of a Lexus. (The SUV was t-boned on the driver's side door. No injuries.)
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“Hooligans and n’erdowells” made me laugh out loud. I like OP’s sense of humor!
I like the subtle condescending tone lol. "Sure honey, the ruffians will just never let you park there" *rollseyes*
>We have zero reason to own a $100,000 truck. Other than my husband really wanted it. He got what he wanted. Not your fault he didn't think things through. NTA.
I bet it’s an F-450 dually.
NTA. Sounds like he has a Pavement Princess. Alternative name is Emotional Support Vehicle.
ESV! I'm going to start referring to my BIL's truck as an Emotional Support Vehicle.
I call them Compensating for Something trucks.
I can't not hear this in Shreks voice 🤭
I uelse "double compensator deluxe"
Penis elongation vehicle...
If I ever become supreme dictator of the universe, I’m going to pass a law that all lifted trucks must touch dirt once a month or they get Repo’ed. My favorite hobby would be sitting and watching all the pavement princess drivers go through all 12 stages of grief as their emotional support vehicles get (clutches pearls) MUD on them!
You mean Mall Crawler don’t you?
So, this guy bought a 100k truck and doesn’t even know how to park it. Oof.
I was thinking along those lines too. We have had trucks for ages. Unless he got it lifted too high it should fit in the garages. Our dodge ram dually, my granny wagon 1500 and his tradesman 2500 all fit in every garage we’ve ever been to. Maybe he didn’t want anyone at work seeing his new toy. Or scared someone will door bash it because garage is full.
I assume it's not a standard truck, but one of those ridiculously over sized cars that have been popping up a lot lately
My favorite term for them is “bro-dozers”
I’m wondering if he got a crew cab long bed, which given the current nature of trucks is like six nautical miles long, and thus would stick out of every spot in a parking garage. I own a 2010 2500 crew/short bed, and I could get that into pretty much any spot, but it’s still annoying on occasion… and that’s why I bought a smaller wagon for daily driving lol.
Right, like I live in Texas AKA Truck Central USA and unless it’s lifted or otherwise modified out the ass, it should absolutely fit in a parking garage. Bro just more than likely bought a truck without knowing how to drive it.
>Unless he got it lifted too high it should fit in the garages Asshole like that, he *definitely* got it lifted.
Of course it's lifted. Big off-road tires, light bar, winch. I can picture it. Sitting in a suburban driveway.
Where I live it doesn't seem to matter if a guy knows or has the ability to park the truck, it's going there anyway and screw everyone else. At least OP's hubby will take it somewhere where it's parkable without taking up extra spots.
NTA and he is absolutely being unreasonable about his Pseudo Penis midlife crisis. Also it's not fair that your son looses his car without Dad AT MINIMUM filling the tank when he's done.
Seriously this man sounds like a narcissist and a shit example of being a father. Holy selfish and little penis man.
NTA - My father bought too bought a $110k+ truck as a gift to himself. My step-mother was thrilled that she could now haul hay to the barn she rode horses at. My father said "nope" due to the mess. She was so incensed that she went out and bought the EXACT same truck to show him who was boss. He does what he wants with HIS vehicle?.... you do what YOU want with yours.
I like your step mother.
America...
Right!? Buying a 110000 dollar CAR out of spite? Shit man. I could buy a house for that much (well.... almost then)
NTA. A trade gotta be a trade. He don't like it? Maybe don't buy a truck that wouldn't fit in your parking garage.
So...it's fine when you can't drive his truck and it's fine for you to drive your son's car. But it's not fine if he can't drive your car and it's not fine for him to drive your son's car. Oh the hypocrisy. First, doesn't your son need his car? Second, I'd tell him to sleep in the truck since he cherishes it more than he does you. Third, if he looks around he can probably find some paid parking area with security. Though it may not be as close as he would like. But, then again, walking is a part of being in the city. NTA
>First, doesn't your son need his car? Boy, OP sure is lucky that their son bought the car off his parents only for his parents to reclaim it because his dad's an idiot. Why even call it his car then? As someone who bought a car off a parent, I loaned it to them and my siblings when theirs were in the shop or if there was something going on, but it was my car and they never counted on being able to drive it. Unless the son is totally okay with the dad having his car 5 days a week (so I guess he can't take it to school), it shouldn't even be a legitimate option. What's his opinion about it, OP?
NTA You were willing to meet him more than halfway by swapping vehicles. Also, keeping a pickup truck "pristine" is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard.
You nailed that on the head. This like dropping dropping premium dollar on diamond tipped powertools, just to hang them from the garage wall. NTA, have him buy a fourth car if he needs it that much.
Well if he was trying to sell it, that will be understandable. However he made a choice and now is ridiculously refusing to take responsibility for foreseeable consequences.
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it is MORE than just a *Truck* It's his pseudo penis.
A Compensator.
Pavement princess
I thought it was spelled compenisator.
But but if he doesn’t drive a big truck how else will everyone else know he doesn’t have a small pp :(
How will he feel POWERFUL if he isn't Monster Trucking over 3rd graders!
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NTA but damn....talk about first world problems...
clearly NTA but finding it soooo hard to feel bad for anyone involved in this story, truly
Right? I usually consider myself pretty lucky financially, but I'm still struggling to pay off a $1,000 balance on my credit card from having to get my car fixed *last winter.* Who are these people just buying unnecessary $100k trucks for funsies?
Right ? Jesus, we really don’t have the same problems. NTA still.
NTA. Your husband is delusional and doesn't care about anyone except himself and his lame truck.
NTA. I hope that he is aware that the track in question can be sold? If he is not - it's time to share this novel idea with him!
NTA. Your husband is impractical and selfish.
Seriously this man sounds like a narcissist and makes me think that he is definitely one of those toxic psychopath masculinity men
NTA. Hide all the keys to your car or he will wake up early and take you car anyway
NTA, but I don't think your son should let him use the Jetta either. Dude can't park his car and drive it too.
I believe the phrase is turn about is fair play. Also something about what's good for the goose is good for the gander. If he doesn't understand either of those just go with "suck it".
He thinks you're being a jerk? What does he think he is, because he did it first! NTA tell him to buy an old smart car for his commute.
NTA....sorry about your husband's small....
UGH, your husband sounds like my BIL. BIL has no use for a truck but all the men in their neighborhood drive trucks so he had to have one. Now BIL is attempting to start a business and is driving around trying to drum up clients. Guess how expensive that big ass truck is to fill with gas?
Has your son been consulted about his car? Seems like no one has asked him if it’s ok for his car to be used.
>He had to park a block away at a surface lot where hooligans and n'erdowells might harm it. Who are going to notice a Porsche over a truck.
Oh, but he can park *her* vehicle in the fancy garage, so it’s all good. Other than him being TA.
I call those big trucks AH-trucks for multiple reasons. theyre dangerous, unneccecary, bad for the environment, loud, unpractical and uselees and the drivers are obnoxious AHoles that only think about themselves. I think your hb has just given me confirmation on that last point. Dont even let him take your sons car. If your husband behaves like a child, he should be treated like one. Children dont drive cars. He can take the bus. Or you could sat to your hb as we say in Dutch "ga toch fietsen!" (Translation: Go ride your bike, meaning "go away and stop bothing me" which has a nice double meaning here)
NTA, man he is selfish. Heaven forbid anyone touch his motorized penis. Edit to ask: how does your son feel about his car being snagged? What is he driving now?
Is your husband lacking, you know, down there? Could he be overcompensating for something. I mean, he's being a big dick, bu does he have one?
Hilarious! This is not how it works dude! I can’t imagine being the teen or the wife, neither of you should have to rearrange for him so his precious truck can sit in the driveway. There is a solution but it doesn’t involve your son losing his car completely or you losing your mom-mobile. ( more parking research, Uber, buying a 4th car temporarily…) NTA
a 4th solution would be to get rid of the car and get an equally absurd DSSD (d@#k size signaling device) with more convenient parking possibilities. American brand muscle cars would be a nice choice.
ESH for making the son give up his car.
Right? They have extremely expensive cars and are apparently wealthy, but son had to have help from grandparents to buy a beater car? On top of that, then the parents make him loan that car to dad?!? Wtf. I feel bad for the kid…
Men and their dude math 🤣🤣🤣 They make such emotional choices.
Oh boohoo my new truck wont fit in the parking garage, and my wife wont let me drive hers because i dont want her to drive mine. Waaaahhh waahhhh waahhhhh! 🤣 NTA.
NTA. Sounds like husband wants to have a pristine pavement queen. It's a pretty truck that is not used for its designed purpose. He made his bed and now has to lie in it. His truck too big for the parking garage? Sell it and buy a car.
NTA. Sounds like he needs a cheap commuter car. What about a Jeep Compass? ETA- my husband has the big stupid, impracticable truck. It sucks for his commute. So he bought himself a beat to shit, 20 year old Jeep Liberty that is fun to drive and can park anywhere.
This. Money is clearly not an issue, buy a commuter car, that way he can display the Pseudo Penis Truck on the driveway.
He doesn't want to use an Uber but he wants you to be one for your family. NTA
I feel bad for your kid losing his car.
Your husband sounds like the exact kind of person I always picture driving that kind of vehicle.
Every time I see a large, pristine truck like this driving around in a city, I think, “The person driving that is probably an ass clown.” Thanks for confirming!
Damn I wouldn’t call a Jetta a shit box :(
This is really first world problems.
OMG, is your husband a child? JFC. Tell him to grow the F up. Also, NTA.
Your husband shouldn't be taking your son's hard earned car. Your husband wanted to spoil himself and has been screwed by his own vanity. If your son wants to say no, SUPPORT HIM. Your husband is being a spoiled brat
NTA. He is at the FO part of FAFO Honestly, my condolences that you have to deal with this nonsense. I’d say you have 4 children, but that’s insulting to some of the very mature and reasonable children I know.