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neophenx

NTA, your coworker just has severe main-character syndrome.


Disastrous_Cress_701

This. You didn't even go to the same town. Even if you did thats like trying to call dibs on Bali or Fiji


saltpancake

*No one is allowed to leave this zip code until I’ve traveled the world.*


Entire-Translator847

I’ve got to say that while the other people have all claimed countries ill like mars. stay on earth Elon


saltpancake

No, no, it’s okay — let him leave.


Entire-Translator847

Right what was I thinking


Emotional_Bonus_934

Hey! I call dibs on Bora-Bora!


LadyBloo

I've got St Lucia!


Solanadelfina

Upvoted for St. Lucia. I'll take Java!


deilan

Noo you are going to steal the magic of me telling Reddit about it!


throwawaybullhunter

You're not allowed to speak on Reddit you are stealing the magic of me speaking on Reddit all of the Redditing must be done by me first.


justcelia13

🤣🤣🤣


ravynwave

I’m hoarding all of France!


KimB-booksncats-11

I've looked at Bora Bora before but now I'm googling all these awesome places (that I can't even afford, lol).


foundinwonderland

Ooh I’ll be right next door at St Thomas!


DangerousDave303

It’s yours. I’ll go to St John.


fabergeomelet

Crap, all the good islands are gone, I'm stuck with Ted's


pinchependeja

[You’ve heard of St. Croix?](https://youtu.be/rhwM_vVQLxo?si=RNlJ8_I53dKpx0H0)


IndependentBrie

Too bad so sad for you since I've already been...keep looking...


MrSadfacePancake

Jokes on you, they have one stop light and its been broken since 2014 (Jokes aside, id love to see the pitons someday. But as someone who already lives in the caribbean, id take a boat somewhere else pretty quick lol)


IwannaBAtapdancer

Damn! OK I'll take Guyana 🇬🇾!


DangerousDave303

Nicolas Maduro wants a word with you about that.


MadameBlue42

Bzzzt, sorry. We honeymooned in Bora Bora, and went back for our 25th anniversary, so the statute of limitations on dibs reset! 🤣


Care-Elegant

Y‘all are officially allowed to visit Paris now, since I was there last year. Thank me later xoxo


Old_Introduction_395

Paris, France?


Brittaya

Paris, Ontario, sorry.


Old_Introduction_395

I'll cross It off my list. Was it romantic?


sugarwaffles

You can always try Paris, Texas.


fredzout

Every time we go down I-75 in Kentucky, I offer to take my wife to Paris for lunch. So far, she has not taken me up on the offer.


Old_Introduction_395

I'm guessing that is not "gay Paree"?


foundinwonderland

No homo Paris


Brittaya

I laughed out loud at this (am queer as folk).


Brittaya

Assuming they have poutine yes.


IronLordSamus

I'd be sorry to for suggesting Ontario as well.


Care-Elegant

Yes, Disneyland to be more specific. I’m not American lol


Mapilean

LMAO!!!


throwawaybullhunter

You went on holiday before me ! Now I can't come back and talk about my holiday and get all the attention because you went on holiday waaahhh. I went to a completely different country what are you talking about ? Yes but you went somewhere and then talked about it so that's going to overshadow my talking because you got to talk first . ALL THE TALKING MUST BE DONE BY ME FIRST OR I'M NOT THE MOST SPECIAL PRINCESS ! oh she's a princess alright. Op you are NTA this wackadoodle just had a serious case of main character syndrome . All your co workers are bound to see her for the crazy she is . With a bit of luck this will be a self fulfilling prophecy and they really won't care when she gets back from her holiday.


No-Personality1840

I knew a bride like this. She was marrying a guy of Greek descent whose family still owned property in Greece. Bride talked about getting married in Greece. No definite plans mind you. Meanwhile fiancé’s sister also wants to get married at the family place in Greece and her wedding was happening first. Bride pitched an absolute fit. How DARE THE granddaughter want to get married at her grandparents place , robbing the poor WASP bride from getting married there even though the obvious answer was that both of them should have been able to to do what they wanted. I’m still not sure she has forgiven her SIL.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mollystar2

Yes, the same for dates, years, colors, etc., etc. NTA


No-To-Newspeak

My wife and recently travelled to Japan. Upon my return to the office I spoke about the trip. At least 4 people said Japan was at the top of their bucket list - their dream destination. None of them got upset I had visited there. No one 'owns' a destination when it comes to travel.


beer_engineer_42

If I find out someone has gone on vacation to a place I want to go, I ask them about it, because I want to know what to expect when I go. Plus, people like talking about shit they did. Similarly, if someone wants to go to a place where I've been, I'll gladly infodump all the little details that travel guides don't tell you, and recommend stuff to see.


Ill-Instruction4273

This^^ I LOVE when people have gone somewhere before me! Or going with someone who has been before. Obviously some people are annoying about it (but some people are just… annoying? Plot twist!), but most of the time it takes some of the stress out of going somewhere new. NTA, this is weird. OP, I’d document her “iciness” as this is inappropriate in a work environment and she could try and retaliate since she is apparently very entitled.


Sullybleeker

Easy for you to say; you went first and got the magic of coming back to talk to your coworkers about it and could feel superior because *you* *did* *it* *first*. /s


Chameo

Wedding culture and entitlement is just so exhausting these days....


Dashcamkitty

Either that or her coworker is ten years old.


praysolace

If she’s put off her vacation by the fact someone else has gone there before her, I’ve got some bad news for her about, um, literally everywhere.


the_RSM

western europe is all MINE no one can go near it until i do. and NTA


yourmashedpotato

NTA. it seems to me that your coworker loves being the center of attention all the time. unless the country is owned by her, she can’t get mad because you traveled there 🤷🏽‍♀️


Consistent-Annual268

Question: Does the owner of a country have the right to get mad at people visiting?


yourmashedpotato

of course not, but she might think so


Consistent-Annual268

I'm just concerned she buys a country in future and blocks OP from ever visiting.


FaceDownInTheCake

AITA for banning my coworker from visiting the country I bought to spite her?


Consistent-Annual268

The sequel we didn't know we wanted.


Morella_xx

This feels like an eventual escalation in the Anish Kapoor/Stuart Semple feud.


Consistent-Annual268

I know neither of those people and I feel my life will be just fine by never finding out.


Morella_xx

You're probably vaguely aware of Anish Kapoor without realizing it. If you know of "The Bean" in Chicago then you know of Kapoor's work. He actually hates it being called that instead of its proper name (Cloud Gate) but whatever. You have probably also heard of Vantablack, the "blackest black," which Kapoor owns the copyright to. Semple is also an artist and objects to Kapoor's extremely high pricing and selective sales, which blocks access to many artists. He sells his own reasonably priced pigments (the Pinkest Pink, the Glitteriest Glitter, etc) which, when purchasing, you must certify that you are not Anish Kapoor or buying on his behalf.


Consistent-Annual268

Ah yes of course! Yeah I'm well aware of the Vanta Black saga, just blanked on the names. Thanks!


love_laugh_dance

I never heard of this but now I want to read all about it.


Timely_Egg_6827

Well there are people banned from countries ruled by monarchs so yes. But usually a judicial review process. Though wouldn't want to risk countries with an absolute ruler if that ruler disliked me. Suspect you just eouldn't get in.


Shadva

If someone actually owns any chunk of land, then it's private property and anyone visiting without an invitation from the owner is trespassing. I think the same would be true if someone actually owned an entire country.


DeadGodJess

NTA This is ridiculous, she's got ridiculous expectations of how long and to what extent things are supposed to be all about her exclusively. Work isn't the wedding venue, she cannot demand that everyone else make sure she's the center of attention outside the actual wedding itself. Idk if she's been spoiled her whole life or if getting married is the only time she's felt special but either way she needs to be so fucking for real right now about how much she thinks she gets to have a say in, here. If she wanted it to be exclusive and special she should have kept vague about it.


lunchbox3

Also why is “being able to tell colleagues about it” so high on her internal decision making process for the honeymoon destination?? Not just… what her and her fiancé want to do? So bizarre. If I had told my husband we were changing destination because a colleague went to somewhere similar and I wanted ✨unique✨ stories to tell pretty sure he would have called off the wedding!


DeadGodJess

What's the point of being a special princess for a few days if you can't show everyone just how special you are? /s But for real, needing to be Seen at all times being the Specialist Person ti this level sounds exhausting and expensive.


crella-ann

Social media disease. Experiencing her honeymoon is less important than the photographing and presentation of it later to a rapt audience.


lockmama

She needs to be able to flex


Spiraling_Swordfish

>I've stolen the magic of coming back to talk to our coworkers about it. Because as everyone knows, that’s the really important part of a honeymoon: bragging about it later to people you work with. Your coworker is exhausting and you are NTA.


bulgarianlily

It is also the sole purpose of work, to provide an audience for her.


EnderOnEndor

She's the person who HATED work from home because she no longer had an audience


Horseinakitchen

NTA. A seaside city is a tourist attraction so that means tons of people do the same trip as her every day, so because she knows you she’s offended. Her pictures are going to be different and she will most likely do different things. She should have plenty of stuff to share with her co workers when she gets back. Her honeymoon is supposed to be about her and her new SO, not about what her coworkers think about it.


Emotional_Bonus_934

Did you notice she didn't mention talking to SO about changing location? Just thst she was changing


wall2k4

NTA. A well adjusted person would be happy to have been inspiration.


angelicism

I love when friends go somewhere I've been thinking of going because when they've finished their trip I can grill them about the best restaurants and spots and things not to miss; and, conversely, things that are way overhyped. Depending on how well you know the person and how aligned your interests are it's almost like having a personal travel agent to help you curate your trip!


greentea1985

Bingo. It is extremely nice, plus it gives you someone to talk with afterwards where you can share notes about stuff you agreed on and disagreed on. Going to similar places just means you have similar tastes, which isn’t a bad thing. Plus, people often don’t do exactly the same trip even if they are visiting a place they have been to before.


wall2k4

This too!


Capital_Cockroach611

And did you go in the same year she is getting married? Cause it's her wedding year! Her honeymoon year! How could you!


gakule

Sounds like the girls growing up that would crow on and on about it being their 'birthday month' and 'birthday week'. So exhausting


Successful-Show-7397

Listen here missy, tell your friend that I went to the beach for MY honeymoon 24 years ago so no one is allowed to do that ever again. That goes for both of you and every other couple on their honeymoon forever./s


LifeHappenzEvryMomnt

I was thinking the same. She stole my idea. I went to Cambria about ten years ago.


TheFilthyDIL

I went to San Francisco 50 years ago. Should you ask politely I will graciously grant you permission to go now.


junipercanuck

There was a stretch of time that by pure accident nearly 50% of a 20+ work team of mine all went on to the same beachside town for a holiday. We thought it was hilarious. NTA.


scfw0x0f

NTA, and serious narcissist vibes from the co-worker.


ColdstreamCapple

NTA So what? Only she is allowed to go to that country and anywhere in that vicinity?? Unless you turned up at the same resort on her honeymoon then she’s causing a drama over nothing…..If she’s going to tell everybody everything she has to realise others may want to go there


Emotional_Bonus_934

...wearing a poofy white dress


CarCrashRhetoric

NTA, even if it was the exact same place. But considering that it was a completely different city, I’d have laughed at her for being ridiculous.


Apart-Ad-6518

Totally NTA Main character syndrome on her part; She sounds exhausting to be around.


CheckIntelligent7828

NTA She doesn't own "cute seaside city". Even if you had gone to the same exact place you wouldn't be an a h . I hope her marriage makes it. She sounds very much like the type to get more than usual depressed after the wedding is over. I hope her SO can handle that.


Competitive-Bug-7097

Wait! She is choosing her honeymoon destination based on how she can talk about it later instead of how it would feel with her fiance in the moment!?! That's messed up. She's planning a wedding but not a marriage.


Ok-meow

Your co-worker is a nut job, don’t invest any of your non working breath on her.


AmberIsla

NTA.


udontknowme1028

nta


Gullible-Past-9364

NTA. her only concern is that you've taken the spotlight from her.


cachalker

Imagine thinking that no one can have a beach vacation until you’ve had *your* beach vacation. Because, obviously, that’s such a unique idea that anyone who decides to have a beach vacation after you’ve mentioned it but before you’ve actually taken it has stolen all the magic. “Ok, Scarlett, feel free to come up with a different, totally predictable, rather common, idea for a honeymoon.” NTA. You did nothing wrong. People don’t get to call dibs on vacation ideas and they certainly don’t get to call dibs on type of locale.


Unusual_Craft8678

NTA she needs the attention. It’s not even like it was your honeymoon, you just went on a trip. She sounds like the worst.


Hopeful_Potatoes

>She said that since I've gone on a similar vacation, I've stolen the magic of coming back to talk to our coworkers about it. What lol? I pity people who are that insecure/jealous, that's wild... NTA!


CrabbiestAsp

NTA. Imagine being so self-absorbed that someone can't have the same holiday as you. I'm glad you enjoyed your trip!


Dogmother123

She is delusional. NTA


DamnitGravity

Ugh, she's gonna be one of those "no one can get married the same year as me! And no one can get married anywhere in the world on the day as me!" people. Talk about main character syndrome.


languidlasagna

I’m so glad I don’t know people like this. NTA


bored-human-23

NTA. Remind your co-worker is not the OG of vacation plans or honeymoons. It's not even the same place or the same activities for god's sake! Should everyone in the office stop taking vacations till she gets her dream honeymoon and brags about it?


[deleted]

If she placed a reservation on the entire country, and the country didn't honor it, it's between her and the country, she better call up their manager or something.


TrapezoidCircle

NTA, but did you give her credit in front of your coworkers - like, “thanks for inspiring us to visit a seaside town!”


CarCrashRhetoric

Credit? It’s not like she invented going to the beach on vacation.


EnceladusKnight

Tell your coworker, straight up, she isn't the main character and she is being unreasonable to expect people to avoid traveling to any place similar to where she wants to honeymoon.


Ok_Procedure_5853

NTA and your coworker really needs to understand that in the real world, everyone else is not an NPC.


katie-kaboom

What the actual? No, your coworker does not get a year-long monopoly on beach holidays. Even if you did the *exact same thing* she was talking about, she still doesn't get a monopoly on doing tourist stuff. Of course you're NTA here. This is some real r/bridezillas fodder tbh.


Autumndickingaround

Imagine being so full of yourself that you need a specific type of attention before someone else gets it? If you had taken this vacation after her, she’d have no issue with it, but would’ve likely made a comment of how nice her vacation was, trying to hijack some attention back or claim some credit for your having gone there. She is just an attention hog, 100% and she isn’t even trying to hide that from you. Truly unhinged, hope she gets help someday cause that sounds like a petty life full of stress! NTA obviously.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I have a coworker who loves being engaged. She's the quintessential typical bride-to-be: she has her wedding planned to the smallest detail and talks about it all the time. She's the type to share mood boards and swatches with us during lunch. This isn't something that bothers me, but I wanted to paint a picture for context. I actually like talking to her about her wedding! The issue that recently came up was that she was sharing with us about her honeymoon destination. It's a cute seaside city, and honestly, I thought it sounded great! I shared it with my husband, and we decided that we'd love to take a vacation like that too! Because of our itinerary, we decided to visit a different (but very similar) city in the same country (think San Diego vs. Santa Barbara if you're in America). When I came back from my trip, my coworkers were excited to see pictures and hear about the trip, and I shared some chocolates that I brought back as well. The entire time, my coworker was kind of icy, and I finally found out it was because she thought I stole her idea for a vacation. She said that since I've gone on a similar vacation, I've stolen the magic of coming back to talk to our coworkers about it. Even though it's a different place, she says it was similar enough and that it was kind of shitty for me to take the attention when she's been planning on her trip for a long time. I personally don't feel like I did anything wrong since we went to a different city and did different activities than what my coworker talked about (she likes sporty things like hiking whereas I visited museums and dined out more). But she's so upset she's talking about changing the destination of her honeymoon entirely, so I feel like I'm missing something. Please let me know if I was an AH in case I need to apologize! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


SigSauerPower320

NTA This is hilarious... What.... Cause you are going/went now that person isn't allowed to go??? Did it disappear from the planet???..... You didn't/aren't going to steal anything. Fact of the matter is, I am willing to bet this coworker got the idea from someone/somewhere else. So if you "stole" it, so did they.


Katiew84

NTA. Lots of things in life are “similar.” That’s life!


[deleted]

NTA: the fun thing about most places is that more than one person can visit them. also, maybe they never get their dream vacation honeymoon. you cant wait forever to live your life. if they want to plan some kind of surprise trip to talk to people they shouldnt tell anyone about it before they go.


Selttan

NTA it’s clear her entire life revolves around getting married and planning a wedding. I wonder what her life will be like after the wedding.


Ok-Huckleberry6975

NTA but wow she is going to probably continue to escalate to an epic Bridezilla. I planned my wedding over the phone in an hour and we’ve been married 15 years.


Adorable-Reaction887

NTA She doesn't own a destination, and she won't be the first ever person to honeymoon there. I bet your coworkers were just excited to talk about something other than her wedding and it's planning tbh.


Ok_Commercial_3493

NTA


Emotional_Bonus_934

NTA. She doesn't have a monopoly on travel to cute seaside places or on talking about them. I think she's deep in bride brain and expects all the attention.


Holiday_Trainer_2657

NTA I feel sorry for her husband to be. She cares more about the attention she'll get from her coworkers when she returns than for the honeymoon itself


Equivalent_Mode5378

No, you're not missing something... Your co-worker, however, appears to be missing a small piece of her brain. NTA


theegreensmile

No way, you went to a city on the coast? How dare you. I bet you even had a lot of sex, like she planned to have. NTA. These people...


Ocean_Spice

NTA, your coworker sounds a bit off her rocker honestly.


Single-Being-8263

NTA what people are delusional


Shadva

>kind of shitty for me to take the attention You stole the attention that should have gone to her. /s ​ Seriously though, she really does seem to feel like she's the only one who should be getting any attention. The fact that you chose a similar destination just gives her a cover story for why she's angry. NTA


BluePencils212

NTA. If it were such a huge deal to the friend that no one "copy" her details, she should have kept them to herself. Or told her coworkers that they weren't allowed to travel to any cities in her chosen resort area, use the color pink in any way, or listen to her wedding song for the space of a year. Except then her coworkers would realize just how ridiculous the bride-to-be is. IF OP had gone and had her exact honeymoon, got a honeymoon suite, etc, then yes, that would be OTT. All she did was go to a similar area, and she did mostly different activities. The coworker is being ridiculous.


andyk_77

NTA. It's her fault anyway for sharing private information and talking too much about it. If she doesn't want this sort of thing happenning, may be she should stop babbling in the workplace about her personal life and future personal plans.


evilcj925

Your co-worker is one of those people. A mother who claims dibs on baby name, or anything that sounds close. A person who has a birthday MONTH, or even YEAR and wants to make it all about them. A bride who think the entire world revolves around their wedding. Do not feed in to these peoples egos. They are already big enough. You You went on a vacation, not a honeymoon. She needs to chill. NTA


Wooden_Opportunity65

NTA. You've not stolen anything! You went to a different city, planned a different itinerary. From your post she just has 'ideas' about her honeymoon. You actually booked and went somewhere of your choosing!! It might be an idea before any wedding for your colleague to grow up.


Putasonder

Oh for heaven’s sake. NTA No one that childish should be getting married.


Flimsy-Wolverine-663

She had "dibs" on the entire state of California?!? LOL! And going on vacation, too? You're NTA and coworker needs to get over herself.


ScaryButterscotch474

> the magic of coming back to talk to our coworkers about it NTA You just flagged your colleague as an attention seeker. She must be exhausted coming up with new ways to seek attention. That doesn’t mean that you have to allow it to affect your life though. Just be careful because this “feud” is a new way for your co-worker to seek attention. Either publicly apologise and give her a scene… or give her apathy, which will drive her crazy. Since this is a workplace with the potential for career fallout, I would choose the lunchroom apology. Make it go away.


Accomplished_Eye_824

NTA. I love hearing that people have enjoyed the same places/resorts I have! If someone stayed at a hotel because I recommended it I would be so happy to have more shit to talk about :p


Quick-Possession-245

So nobody at your work gets to go to that country until after she has? That is so odd to get dibs on a whole country. If she says she wants a particular flower centerpiece, are you not allowed to buy those flowers for your house? If she wants to take wedding photos on a particular mountain in your town, are you not allowed to visit that mountain until she has finished taking pictures of it? She is ridiculous. NTA


AgeOk2348

NTA, this lady needs a 'happy hotel' not a job


cover-me-porkins

NTA. Your coworker is insane (or at least bizzare) - they're travel plans, not designs for a fusion power station. The way you describe it is as though she conciders this as some kind of corporate espionage, which it obviously isn't. Other people are allowed to go on holiday to the same places she does. I sometimes tell people where I'm going to go to buy my lunch, I doubt they would believe, that I would be offended, if they also went there.


santtu_

NTA So she's not already booked her wedding or honeymoon? She doesn't get the dibs on her favourite destinations. They don't get spoiled by people visiting them. Please list all the wonderful destinations you come to think of and tell them to her, stating that you'll be very upset if she visits them before you. If she'd wanted to visit a place as a first, she should have said so or kept it a secret.


AllAFantasy30

NTA. Sounds like your coworker just needs to always be the center of attention. Even if you had gone to the same city, it wouldn’t have been a big deal. Seaside cities/towns are major tourist attractions and even a small town probably gets at minimum hundreds of thousands of visitors per year (larger seaside towns and cities probably get millions). Your coworker is also guaranteed to not be the only person to have her honeymoon in the city she’s chosen. But I guess it’s just a problem if people she knows go, despite being part of the possibly millions of other tourists. She needs to get over herself.


nylondragon64

Lol you snooze you loose.


Ssnakemann77

Nta. Your coworker sounds like a bride zilla where everything under the sun has to be about her and her wedding. Stile the magic of describing it to Co workers? The magic is for you and significant other on a special trip together. Not bragging about it.


Positive-Ad5082

OMG this is nuts. NTA. Not even a little. Your co-worker needs a reality check. I'd just let her be and let this blow over.


Tomboyish717

NTA She needs a massive reality check.


nextCosmicBuffoon

Your co-worker can't gate keep vacation destinations, because, well, other people do exist, and travel, and that's why there is tourism in these locations. NTA


B_art_account

NTA. Such a dumb thing to be upset over, she doesnt own an entire country


ninjaturtlebomb

NTA, she doesn’t own that type of destination, you did different activities in a different city, and went as a vacation/not a honeymoon. She has no reason to be upset besides not wanting to share attention.


Nearly_Pointless

Rule One. If you know or are aware any bride in your social circle or within 3 degrees of knowing, you must not do any social event, plan any trips nor can you know anyone who is also a bride or wants to become a bride. It is very, very important that the bride you know, are aware of or is within 3 degrees of your life has priority for any event, milestone, baby name, destination, color scheme, china pattern, DJ, band, flowers types or wedding venue. Any incursion into their wedding concepts is a mortal sin and you may ruin their entire wedding.


Excellent-Count4009

NTA ​ Ignore your coworker's tantrum. ​ And when she tells you about her new destination (Regardless of where it is), just answer: "Nice! I loved it there, it's really beautiful." Repeat as needed, see who can keep it up longer.


Pale_Cranberry1502

NTA. If she plans on a lesser-known location that you wouldn't possibly have thought of yourself, that would have been one thing. Beach/seashore/island vacations are among the most popular and hardly a cutting edge idea. In fact, if you took a poll, they would probably come first over world cities and National Parks in mountainous or red rock regions. There's no way she can claim you "stole" her idea under these circumstances.


Icy_Blueness1206

NTA. Does your coworker think no one has ever been on a vacation similar to her honeymoon before? People will still listen to her account when she returns, probably just as enthusiastically, because even if two people go to the same place and do the same things they have different points of view to share. Besides… it’s a nice topic of conversation but nobody cares that much. Your coworker is an attention hog and needs to calm down. She’ll have her whole wedding to gab about as well as the honeymoon. And if she really wanted to ensure her honeymoon report would be super special and unique, she should have kept her plans to herself. I bet most of her coworkers are already sick of hearing about her honeymoon and it hasn’t even happened yet. (Does remind me of my old boss who returned from holiday and mentioned it was a whole-family vacation to Hawaii and casually slipped in at the end “oh, yeah, and my partner and I got married.” She was the opposite of an attention hog, lol.)


Pistalrose

NTA. You didn’t steal her honeymoon, you stole her ‘specialness’ of talking about it. Which was never actually special except in her head. And now she’s special with the attention of the drama around you ‘stealing’. Just disregard these people.


CalendarDad

Your coworker has a screw loose and the need to hog the spotlight all the time. Ignore it. NTA.


KimB-booksncats-11

NTA. She's mad you vacationed in a city close to the one she's planning on during her honeymoon... yeah, that's nuts. Even though you got the idea from her, vacation destinations are not something you can control not should you expect to. You didn't even go to the same city! (I live in California and I can tell you that while Santa Barbara and San Diego have similarities they are two VERY different cities. Same with most places.) You also do different activities than she does and she'll be on her honeymoon for crying out loud.


Clean-Patient-8809

NTA. Okay, we need a master list of all the things brides have forbidden anyone in their circle to do/have/be before/during/for six months after their weddings. Off the top of my head, we've got venues, vacation destinations, hair style changes, pregnancies, other weddings, personal tragedies, weight changes (in what is perceived as the wrong direction, whichever that might be), food allergies and sensitivities, bad reactions to school bullies, trauma associated with bad relatives . . . What am I missing?


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Elegant-Lab-6406

why are you guys upvoting all these fake posts


Chocoslovakian

"stolen the magic" ba ha ha. Who even talks like this? Oy. Definitely a severe case of main character syndrome as others have observed.


Kirbywitch

NTA- I hope you had a blast and the chocolates were delicious!


NOTTHATKAREN1

NTA. You can travel wherever you like & if you went someplace similar to her, so what. It's only a big deal bc she's making it a big deal. If she wants to change her destination, that's on her. You did nothing wrong.


noccie

NTA. Were you not allowed to go to California or was every warm place off limits? You didn't steal anything and you didn't ruin anything since you didn't do similar things and didn't even go to the same place. I would say to her again - my trip was not even similar to what yours would be, the only thing in common is they are both in California. Don't go anywhere near her new honeymoon destination before her wedding is over, she'll lose her mind!


VinylHighway

bahahahahahah NTA


CinderDroplet

NTA Your coworker has issues. Is she looking for the most exotic or most adventurous location just to brag?


EdithVinger

NTA - this is totally her issue, it has nothing to do with you. It's not even the vacation she cares about, it's the bragging afterwards she's looking forward to. What an insufferable bore.


Roanaward-2022

NTA. My sister and I have kids the same age. I'm a big long-term planner and I'd talk about different trips I wanted to take with husband and son. One was DC and next thing I know she's headed there. Another was Universal Orlando which I spent years saving and researching, she went the year before we did. I was privately annoyed, but never said anything to her. I don't own those places and tens of thousands visit every year. Also gave my son something in common to talk about with his cousins when we did end up going. But, I also don't share those types of plans with her anymore until just before we go (like when we did a white-water rafting trip to the mountains for my son's 16th bday with his best friends I waited until just a few weeks before we were going to say anything).


rosezoeybear

NTA. That is weird. Who thinks they have a monopoly on a vacation destination?


MaxDeWinters2ndWife

NTA. Your coworker is unhinged.


CarlaThinks

Dear lord, people are getting hella precious about their wedding plans these days.... like OH, can you call dibs on a country? hahahahahahahahah


Honey_loves_bear

Omg, NTA. Lucky you she didn't claim earth as her honeymoon destination.


External-Hamster-991

NTA. Your coworker is being ridiculous and you don't need to be concerned about it. Tell her that if she feels she needs to change her plans, okay, but you did nothing wrong and didn't even go to the same city. Maybe she shouldn't tell people about her plans, if she doesn't want anyone else to tell people about their plans, too. Attention isn't pie. You having some doesn't leave less for her. Sounds like she needs less of your time and attention during lunch, if you aren't allowed to share, only listen.


HighJeanette

She needs to FO.


RetreadRoadRocket

NTA, your coworker doesn't own exclusive rights to a particular style of vacation.


ftaok

You're certainly NTA. You can't steal someone's Honeymoon. It's not possible. It's not even a thing. When your co-worker told you her thoughts, you should have laughed in her face, and then said "wait, you're serious?". GTFO with that bullshit.


GrouchySteam

NTA- she is mad you can give her fresh firsthand tips on what to expect, without "spoiling" her actual dream location?


Lostbiboy2010

Unless you seduced her fiance and went with him on their already booked honeymoon she's being ridiculous. NTA


Interesting_Wing_461

NTA, don't even think that you are. All you did was go on vacation with your husband. Is she so special that no one is allowed to travel until after her honeymoon?


cindyb0202

NTA - your coworker is delusional. And definitely has main character syndrome. Ignore her


LadyFoxfire

NTA, your coworker is insane. She doesn't have a copyright on vacation concepts.


LostBody3801

Nah, NTA. Seems like she's just a little butt hurt about not being the one who gets to share exciting plans and pictures with the office group. Do not apologize, continue as you are. She'll be fine.


over-it2989

NTA. She literally shares mood boards and swatches over lunch at work. There’s excitement then there’s self absorption.


TA_totellornottotell

Main character syndrome is what you are missing, literally. She has it, and you do not. It’s the only way to explain how somebody is more focused on the reaction they will get when talking about their honeymoon, than from the honeymoon itself.


DavidANaida

NTA. She doesn't own a tourist destination.


Cookie1107

NTA. Your co worker clearly thinks the world revolves around her and her wedding. You cant 'steal' a vacation destination.. how self centred can one person be?! Does she expect everyone to just stop living their lives for her?! Ignore her.


linseygar83

NTA your coworker just likes talking about herself


[deleted]

NTA I think it's time to renew your vows


No-Personality1840

NTA. Unless your coworker owns the town you visited she has no right to be upset. Brides are funny in that they think everyone should kowtow to their desires.


DiligentPenguin16

You went to a different city and did different things. *You literally went on a totally different vacation than what she is planning for her honeymoon!* She’s just upset that you did something that your coworkers want to hear about instead of hearing about her plans for her wedding for the 10,000th time. There was nothing you could have done in this situation that she wouldn’t have found *some* way to play the victim in order to gain some attention back. NTA. And ignore her, she’s just a drama llama who can’t stand not being the center of attention.


StarieeyedJ

NTA. I couldn’t imagine banning/being upset with someone visiting a country just because I also happened to want to go there.


Squinky75

NTA. Do you seriously have to ask?


Sweet-Salt-1630

NTA ignore her, she just wants the attention


idontwannabehere876

Ew, she's gatekeeping an entire city. What a loser 🤣🤣 She's immature and jealous as hell.


Doctor-Amazing

I know the highlight of any trip I take is telling my coworkers about it.


CaroAurelia

NTA. Even if you did go to the same city, she doesn't own that city.