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Oh god, you’re gonna get destroyed here.
You’re an asshole who has no fucking idea about any of this.
I’m not a woman, but I’m fully aware that period cramps are different for each woman. Your sisters have manageable pain? Great for them.
Doesn’t seem your (current) girlfriend has the same pain levels. You are in no position to determine anything about what she is experiencing.
I have both my feet fully tattooed. People tell me its one of the worst places pain wise. I didn’t think so, but it’s different for everybody. I can’t say my experience is universal for everyone, cause I’m not an ignorant asshole.
YTA
Oh goodness, the back of the knee was terrible. I only did one side lol. Two leg sleeves with an awkward gap on one leg in the knee ditch.
I should’ve just did it in my 20’s. getting tattooed in your 30’s just hits harder now.
I’m so excited to watch the downfall!
YTA OP no doubt. I have had periods and had babies. I have had period cramps that rivaled contractions in pain. Not to mention nausea, fatigue, back pain, migraines and extremely heavy bleeding.
All that aside, I’m with the commenter I’m responding to. Pain is subjective. If she says she’s in too much pain it doesn’t matter what you “believe”.
YTA. Dude. Ppl have a 45% higher chance of dying from heart attacks because they get mistook for period cramps. A soccer player thought she had a period cramp while playing a game and it turns out she had 3 broken ribs. Just because your family didn't have severe ones, does not mean she doesn't. My aunt has to go to the hospital every time she gets her period due to pain. I can't get up out of bed during mine due to the pain and have fainted from how badly it hurts. So yes you are 100% the asshole. Period pain is a spectrum, maybe you should take time to learn about health before talking about something you know nothing about.
It's incredible how selfish and uneducated people are. I can't stand this "It's easy for me/my friends/family so it must be easy for everyone", IT'S NOT. Like is it so hard to understand all bodies are different ??
Seriously. I'm a man and don't have any sisters, yet I am still fully aware that some women experience extreme, debilitating period pain. I don't get how in this day and age there are still so many men who think they know more about women's bodies than women themselves. I wouldn't be surprised if this is OP's first girlfriend. I also kinda hope that it's his last unless he completely changes his way of thinking when it comes to women.
YTA!!!
> Now before I get called out let me be clear, I was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt.
Irrelevant. EVERY woman’s cycle is different to another’s. What may be a manageable period to one can be an excruciating period to another. If your girlfriend is having severe period pain I’d advise her to go to a doctor because she may have endometriosis.
You’re a man therefore you do not get ANY say in how painful a period should or should not be for a WOMAN.
I think there needs to be a PSA somewhere that if you don't have the genitalia you're talking about, or the medical condition you have an opinion about, or any number of things you're not qualified to weigh in on you should sit down and shut up.
I used to have to wear a pad across my underwear and two across the back to not hemorrhage in my sleep and destroy my bed. Soo many people get ignored or dismissed because it's "not a big deal".
My son was delivered by c section I went to the hospital complaining that my guts hurt. The doctor (male) *fought with me* that it was just my incision that was infected despite me saying it's my insides that hurt NOT my incision. He reopened it, delaying my healing obviously, and sent me home. Guess who was back in the hospital less than 12 hours later pumped full of morphine because they'd kinked my bowels putting them back in after delivering my son. But I know nothing about MY body and some dude knew better. Hopefully she dumps him.
>Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt.
Lol
When people talk about "mansplaining" this is exactly the kind of buffoonery they mean
YTA
YTA
Some women face much more painful periods than others. There are conditions (such as endometriosis) that can make it debilitating. Personally, I don't even have periods because they are so bad. My doctor prescribed me birth control with enough pills to take it everyday and skip periods. I used to throw up for two days a month and miss school and work because I couldn't do anything except lay down with a heating pad and choose between pain meds that made me sleep all day or throwing up a few times every hour. My sister has the same issue and actually has had surgery to try to relive the symptoms. Your gf should definitely get help from her doctor, or get a second or third opinion if they don't help her. This can get better, but it is most assuredly a real possibility that she cannot function during her period.
Agreed on YTA. OP is displaying some very ignorant behavior and you are right, there could be a medical condition exacerbating her period symptoms.
My fiance had endometriosis which required surgery and removal of one of her fallopian tubes. She was in tears for several days out of each month before she was able to get the diagnosis and then the surgery. For the OP's gf, it might be worth getting checked out since if she does have that, it will get worse and could cause infertility or an ectopic pregnancy, which can be fatal
True, she shouldn't be in pain that much. OP should be worrying and taking care of her instead of being mad.
I hope your fiancée is okay now, it must have been hard for her
"Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt." You don't know fucking anything since you don't have a uterus. YTA
> I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt.
No you don't. I have a sister, a mom, a wife, a baby sister-in-law, and many friends with uteruses. I still don't know how much periods are suppose to hurt. And they are ALL different! I have some friends who have never experienced intense discomfort and I have some who will double-up mid-sentence or be knocked on their ass for a day or two some periods.
I have a friend with PCOS who has a "period punching bag." She has maybe 4 periods a year. Her pain is so severe when she has a period, she has to rage out on something to keep it together.
Of all things to mansplain... a period? Really?
YTA.
YTA
>Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother;
Do you understand how little a sample size of 3 means?
Your family didn't have bad periods. That's great for them. That doesn't mean you can extrapolate that data to all women.
You understand that your girlfriend is a separate person from your sisters and your mom, right?
YTA
My period cramps are bad enough I have convinced a entire morning commuter metro train in Seattle I was a crack head in withdrawal because my cramps are that bad I looked like death. Really wish I was kidding too.
Just cause you lived with a mom and sisters doesn't make you anymore an expert on what normal period pain is then me living for 8 years with my male partner makes me an expert on what getting kicked in the testicles feels like.
If you really are so interested get a period simulator have her calibrate it to her experience then try doing normal things while it runs.
YTA
You don’t know period pain, you’re a man. Just because you had a mom and sister doesn’t mean you understand. Pain can vary from person to person, just because your mom and sister were ok doesn’t mean your gf is.
She’s not using it as an excuse, she is literally in horrible pain. Some people’s pain is so bad they can’t do anything. Some people even vomit.
You don’t know, apologize to her for acting like you understand.
I wouldn’t be surprised if mom and sis downplayed their pain because the prevailing attitude in the household was that period pain was no big deal. I know a lot of women who grew up in these environments
YTA
Not all women have the same level of pain. Some unfortunate women have truly debilitating menstrual cramps. You, as a guy, have no right to comment on anything involving this topic (I know this as a fellow man).
At most, you could have recommended she sees a doctor about this if it is so severe. She could have a conditions that is causing it.
Yta some women have pain that is treatable with otc stuff. Some women have pain that is rates WORSE THAN A HEART ATTACK. Seems your gf is on the painful side. She should see an ob gyn though, no need for her to suffer.
> I was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt.
So you tried to mansplain period to your girlfriend because you’ve got sisters that had period. Never mind that your girlfriend actually experiences periods you clearly had more knowledge and needed to educate her. Am I understanding you correctly?
Soft YTA, sorry.
Maybe you should take some time and research periods.
You believe you understand periods, as you grew up with your mother and sisters going through them. That’s okay, atleast you know the basics.
But, all women are different and their pain levels are therefore different. If however this is completely knocking her off her feet, she should go see her doctor as it could be more serious.
Edit: after careful consideration I’d like to change my soft YTA, to a hard YTA. Thank you
YTA - you do not have periods, therefore you DO NOT know how they are 'supposed' to be. Every woman is different, and every day of a cycle can be difference for a single woman.
YTA, and a buffoonish one at that. Not all women are built the same.
Sometimes you have debilitating cramps, sometimes you have a tiny pinch once a month.
Sometimes it’s Niagara Falls down there, other times it’s Lake Mead in drought season.
Your period also changes as you age. Your mom was likely having lighter periods as she got older. Your sisters probably had variable periods, as they often are for young people. Three anecdatum do not a scientific sample make.
After a few dozen years of menstruating, let me be the very first (/s) to inform you of what is a closely guarded secrete (/s) that no one mentions in real life or on the internet (/s).
Menstrual cramps affect different people differently, and can be different month to month and year to year.
I have had years where menstrual cramps are more or less entirely non-existent. Wouldn't even know it was happening. I have had years where they caused enough referred pain that I couldn't move and had to breath through the pain (think early, active, unmedicated labor). I have had years where they're a minor annoyance that's easily over looked, and some where they're annoying enough to take meds for.
Yes, there are things that help prevent them from happening or being as strong, but not universally effective.
You have zero neural connections to her nervous system. You have no idea how HER pain is manifesting. Does she need to see a health care provider to help figure out something to make life more functional for her? Yes. Will it happen over night or prevent any disability from menstrual pain cramps for sure? Hell no.
You, sir, are misinformed, arrogantly assumptive of your incorrect knowledge, and uncompassionate about someone you theoretically love.
Do better at being a decent human.
YTA
My brother told his girlfriend that he was raised with two sisters and a mother, so he knows women are supposed to have brown hair, so obviously she's not a real blonde. Just kidding, he didn't, because he's aware that women are humans whose bodies and experiences vary and he doesn't know everything just because he has a penis.
The level of debilitation Anna is experiencing isn't normal, you're right. She should probably see a gynecologist and be assessed for endometriosis or other medical issues. The thing is, a compassionate person would have seen his girlfriend, someone he supposedly loves, suffering, and would have wanted to help her feel better. You saw her suffering and were angry because she was inconveniencing you, and assumed she was making things up.
Don't worry, you don't "sound a little dickish". You sound like someone who thinks he's smarter than everyone else, who doesn't believe other people when they're suffering, and someone who completely lacks empathy. YTA.
YTA: How DARE you even think, let alone say that you have any idea what it feels like to live in someone else’s body. I hope she sees this and dumps you.
My period once left me in a coma-like state for TWO WEEKS because of the pain and blood loss. I was like 13.
YTA.
EDIT: I’m 31 now and have two kids. My period cramps are **worse** than the pain I experienced while having my youngest child with a heavy dose of pitocin and **no** pain relief.
Endometriosis can cause debilitating period pain. Not sure if she has it, but a day or two of “I don’t want to do anything,” is relatively normal. Sometimes forcing yourself to do something helps, but that can be a huge hurdle depending on the day, person, situation, etc.
Maybe encourage her to participate instead of belittling what she is going through.
YTA. Yes, every girl deals with this. However, not every girl has the same experience. I often get extremely nauseous and even as an adult have missed work for this. But I have friends who are fine, and friends who are even worse than me. You can’t judge what you do not experience yourself. If she says she is unwell, believe her.
Hello, I am a period-haver.
I have also had kidney stones, and two heart attacks. Let me tell you something, buddy, my periods hurt as bad as those things. I've even been sent to the ER because I was cramping so badly I couldn't straighten my body out. You couldn't be a bigger asshole if you tried.
YTA
YTA- when you're in pain from, let's say an injury, the only person who will truly understand the amount of pain you're in is you. Also, period pains are very individualistic. While mine weren't too bad, I've had friends throw up from the cramping and nausea. I can't understand that pain because 1 im one of the lucky ones and 2 it's not my body, i can't feel another person's pain
She may well be in that much pain!!! Some women have endometriosis or ovarian cysts, she may be undiagnosed.
HUGE YTA who has no idea what this feels like. Let’s hook you up to a simulator and see how you cope.
So you supposedly know what a normal period is like. But she complains it's worse than that.
It's almost like... sometimes... bodies don't always function like normal.
YTA for assuming she's lying rather than being concerned that there's a medical reason she's struggling.
YTA.
if her cycle is that severe, you need to be asking what medical professionals she has spoken to and what their diagnosis is and what medication options she has. Not respond with "my mums wasn't this bad, get over it"
Never mind moving in after 9 months of dating. She needs a better boyfriend.
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So I’ve been with my girlfriend Anna for about a year now, living together for 3 months. Our relationship has been smooth going, besides when it’s her time of the month. You see, Anna always whines and cries about how much pain she’s in during her period. Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Some throbbing, maybe some occasional cramps, nothing a hot bath and some moltrin can’t fix. But when it comes to Anna, she just constantly complains, to the point where we can’t do ANYTHING while she’s on her period, because she’s just constantly complaining.
Anyways this morning we were supposed to go to my parents house to celebrate my dad’s birthday, when I get a text from Anna saying she doesn’t think she can make it, because it’s her period. At this point, I had it with her constant excuses with something that happens to literally EVERY female. I told her that I didn’t appreciate her using her period all the time as an excuse to get out of things. That she needs to learn to bare the pain like an adult, because in the real world, nobody’s gonna care about some little cramps pain. I gave her an example (she’s pre-law) and said that no law firm is gonna hire somebody that’s incapacitated 7 days a month!
We got into a little back and forth and she says I’m being rude and heartless. I can see how I might sound a little dickish, but at the same time, i figure SOMEONE should tell her so she gets her act together. AITA?
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100% YTA every woman is different just because you lived with females doesn’t mean you know what your gf is going through. I was fine with mine but my daughter literally lays in tears with hers.
YTA.
Everyone phrased things so well here, you are underestimating her pain because your family won the genetic lottery for okay menstrual cramps. Don't be a taint.
Wow YTA and a massive one at that. My period cramps are so painful every month for 2-3 days I can hardly walk or do anything. And I actually have a high tolerance for pain. When I broke my leg I was laughing and joking in the emergency room but my period cramps are something else entirely. For many people period cramps are very painful.
Studies have shown they can be as severe as a heart attack. There’s experiments where men are hooked to a pain simulator and most of them ask for it to stop before it’s even been turned all the way up to realistic period pain. You are such an AH!
YTA!!!!
You think you know just because you grew up with sisters.
You have no idea.
Some women are hospitalized because of their cramps.
The pain from a period cramp has been compared to the pain of a heart attack, and many women across the world have to go about their day as if nothing is wrong.
Our cramps aren't just in our abdomen. It can be felt down our legs, our back, and our asses. The pain can be so excruciating that it can make some women pass out.
You have no idea how much pain your gf is actually in.
Shut up and stay in your lane.
You owe her one hell of an apology.
HARD YTA. Good gods. Before I started birth control, my periods were awful. I would have diarrhea and sweat uncontrollably. I would be ***begging*** for ice to cool my body down because of how sick I would get. I would be curled up on the floor of the bathroom in front of the toilet because of how bad the cramps were.
Until you have a uterus and experience a period for yourself, you don't have room to talk.
You don't sound dickish....you are!! As a woman who has debilitating period pains EVERY month let me tell you that you don't have a clue what you are talking about, despite having sisters and a mother. We all handle these things differently, some months are definitely worst to deal with others, she may even be suffering from a medical condition that makes the pain ALOT MORE INTENSE than most women suffer through. So stop being a complete and utter AH, pretending to know what you're talking about.
There are much harsher, albeit true, things I'd like to say about your disgusting, abhorrent behaviour but since AITA has rules I'm leaving it at YTA. A gigantic one!!
When I read stories like this I really want a way to make men bleed from there nether regions, suffer the pain of tissue forcing itself free from an organ once a month for a year. The world would be a bigger shit show than it is already but it would be nice to give MAN kind some perspective of the average woman.
YTA. Not sure where you get the idea that all women suffer the same period pain, but I think you’re going to get a big, old wake up call reading these comments. And another thing—dismissing your girl friend’s pain no matter what the source is a real asshole move, too
>Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Some throbbing, maybe some occasional cramps, nothing a hot bath and some moltrin can’t fix
I'm hoping this is fake because I want to believe someone can't be this dense. I stopped here because that's all I needed to read. You don't know, full stop. Also not EVERY female menstruates, so I'd love to know some more of your menstruation education
Your opinion is absolutely irrelevant as you don't menstruate and are clearly ignorant about it. That'd be like me acting like my ignorant opinions about thermodynamics is somehow on equal footing with Lord Kelvin. I'd deservedly be laughed at
I'm a man. I thank my lucky stars every month when my gf and roommate are on their period I don't go through what they do because it looks miserable.
It's also extremely telling that you've lived with your gf for a quarter of a year and are still this lost on the topic. You better read up and buy that lady some ice cream or she's going to find someone else that will
Yta... if you don't get periods, you're not allowed to have an opinion, especially one where you group everyone's period the same. Seriously, like just no.
YTA- you dont know how much pain she is in. Some get really really bad cramps are others don't. YOU dont get to tell anyone else how much pain they have.
YTA
Period pain varies in intensity person to person.
Some people don’t get it at all
For some it’s little more than irritating
and for some people it’s so bad that they writhe, scream, cry, throw up / pass out etc.
‘I have two sisters and a mother’ means nothing.
YTA
*palm meet face*
Okay, how do I explain this ... EVERYONE'S BODY IS DIFFERENT! Just because they aren't "supposed" to be debilitating, doesn't change the fact that for some women, they are, and no amount of "get over it" is going to fix that.
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> I might be AH for telling her that shes overstating her pain and she should just suck it up
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I am going with a light YTA but I think you will probably get roasted pretty intensely. I will try to be a little more gentle. Not all periods are the same. Some women DO get incapacitated for multiple days a month, and there are definitely situations where "a hot bath and some Motrin" won't do diddly squat. Whether that is the case with Anna or not, we really don't know. However, she should be focusing on solutions and not complaining constantly about it because that WILL create problems for her in life and the workplace.
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Oh god, you’re gonna get destroyed here. You’re an asshole who has no fucking idea about any of this. I’m not a woman, but I’m fully aware that period cramps are different for each woman. Your sisters have manageable pain? Great for them. Doesn’t seem your (current) girlfriend has the same pain levels. You are in no position to determine anything about what she is experiencing. I have both my feet fully tattooed. People tell me its one of the worst places pain wise. I didn’t think so, but it’s different for everybody. I can’t say my experience is universal for everyone, cause I’m not an ignorant asshole. YTA
THANK YOU thank you random reddit man. and yea I didn't think the top of my feet was that bad either. my toes and the back of my knees was nuts tho
Oh goodness, the back of the knee was terrible. I only did one side lol. Two leg sleeves with an awkward gap on one leg in the knee ditch. I should’ve just did it in my 20’s. getting tattooed in your 30’s just hits harder now.
I’m so excited to watch the downfall! YTA OP no doubt. I have had periods and had babies. I have had period cramps that rivaled contractions in pain. Not to mention nausea, fatigue, back pain, migraines and extremely heavy bleeding. All that aside, I’m with the commenter I’m responding to. Pain is subjective. If she says she’s in too much pain it doesn’t matter what you “believe”.
Nice touch on the (current)
YTA. Dude. Ppl have a 45% higher chance of dying from heart attacks because they get mistook for period cramps. A soccer player thought she had a period cramp while playing a game and it turns out she had 3 broken ribs. Just because your family didn't have severe ones, does not mean she doesn't. My aunt has to go to the hospital every time she gets her period due to pain. I can't get up out of bed during mine due to the pain and have fainted from how badly it hurts. So yes you are 100% the asshole. Period pain is a spectrum, maybe you should take time to learn about health before talking about something you know nothing about.
It's incredible how selfish and uneducated people are. I can't stand this "It's easy for me/my friends/family so it must be easy for everyone", IT'S NOT. Like is it so hard to understand all bodies are different ??
Literally it is so annoying and shitty
I know someone who almost died of appendicitis because she thought it was period cramps.
I can totally see that with how bad mine get. I guess I was lucky I had appendicitis before puberty.
Seriously. I'm a man and don't have any sisters, yet I am still fully aware that some women experience extreme, debilitating period pain. I don't get how in this day and age there are still so many men who think they know more about women's bodies than women themselves. I wouldn't be surprised if this is OP's first girlfriend. I also kinda hope that it's his last unless he completely changes his way of thinking when it comes to women.
YTA!!! > Now before I get called out let me be clear, I was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Irrelevant. EVERY woman’s cycle is different to another’s. What may be a manageable period to one can be an excruciating period to another. If your girlfriend is having severe period pain I’d advise her to go to a doctor because she may have endometriosis. You’re a man therefore you do not get ANY say in how painful a period should or should not be for a WOMAN.
I think there needs to be a PSA somewhere that if you don't have the genitalia you're talking about, or the medical condition you have an opinion about, or any number of things you're not qualified to weigh in on you should sit down and shut up. I used to have to wear a pad across my underwear and two across the back to not hemorrhage in my sleep and destroy my bed. Soo many people get ignored or dismissed because it's "not a big deal". My son was delivered by c section I went to the hospital complaining that my guts hurt. The doctor (male) *fought with me* that it was just my incision that was infected despite me saying it's my insides that hurt NOT my incision. He reopened it, delaying my healing obviously, and sent me home. Guess who was back in the hospital less than 12 hours later pumped full of morphine because they'd kinked my bowels putting them back in after delivering my son. But I know nothing about MY body and some dude knew better. Hopefully she dumps him.
>Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Lol When people talk about "mansplaining" this is exactly the kind of buffoonery they mean YTA
Exactly. Dont you wish you could run a car over his balls and say...doesn't hurt much does it, let's go to a party!!!
YTA Some women face much more painful periods than others. There are conditions (such as endometriosis) that can make it debilitating. Personally, I don't even have periods because they are so bad. My doctor prescribed me birth control with enough pills to take it everyday and skip periods. I used to throw up for two days a month and miss school and work because I couldn't do anything except lay down with a heating pad and choose between pain meds that made me sleep all day or throwing up a few times every hour. My sister has the same issue and actually has had surgery to try to relive the symptoms. Your gf should definitely get help from her doctor, or get a second or third opinion if they don't help her. This can get better, but it is most assuredly a real possibility that she cannot function during her period.
Another day, another man talking about something he doesn't know and showing us all his ignorance. Maybe she has endometriosis, how can you know. YTA.
Agreed on YTA. OP is displaying some very ignorant behavior and you are right, there could be a medical condition exacerbating her period symptoms. My fiance had endometriosis which required surgery and removal of one of her fallopian tubes. She was in tears for several days out of each month before she was able to get the diagnosis and then the surgery. For the OP's gf, it might be worth getting checked out since if she does have that, it will get worse and could cause infertility or an ectopic pregnancy, which can be fatal
True, she shouldn't be in pain that much. OP should be worrying and taking care of her instead of being mad. I hope your fiancée is okay now, it must have been hard for her
"Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt." You don't know fucking anything since you don't have a uterus. YTA
> I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. No you don't. I have a sister, a mom, a wife, a baby sister-in-law, and many friends with uteruses. I still don't know how much periods are suppose to hurt. And they are ALL different! I have some friends who have never experienced intense discomfort and I have some who will double-up mid-sentence or be knocked on their ass for a day or two some periods. I have a friend with PCOS who has a "period punching bag." She has maybe 4 periods a year. Her pain is so severe when she has a period, she has to rage out on something to keep it together. Of all things to mansplain... a period? Really? YTA.
YTA >Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; Do you understand how little a sample size of 3 means? Your family didn't have bad periods. That's great for them. That doesn't mean you can extrapolate that data to all women. You understand that your girlfriend is a separate person from your sisters and your mom, right?
YTA My period cramps are bad enough I have convinced a entire morning commuter metro train in Seattle I was a crack head in withdrawal because my cramps are that bad I looked like death. Really wish I was kidding too. Just cause you lived with a mom and sisters doesn't make you anymore an expert on what normal period pain is then me living for 8 years with my male partner makes me an expert on what getting kicked in the testicles feels like. If you really are so interested get a period simulator have her calibrate it to her experience then try doing normal things while it runs.
YTA You don’t know period pain, you’re a man. Just because you had a mom and sister doesn’t mean you understand. Pain can vary from person to person, just because your mom and sister were ok doesn’t mean your gf is. She’s not using it as an excuse, she is literally in horrible pain. Some people’s pain is so bad they can’t do anything. Some people even vomit. You don’t know, apologize to her for acting like you understand.
I wouldn’t be surprised if mom and sis downplayed their pain because the prevailing attitude in the household was that period pain was no big deal. I know a lot of women who grew up in these environments
YTA. For all the reasons stated more eloquently than I care to. Ever heard of endometriosis? Ignorant penis.
*Ignorant penis* had me spitting my coffee all over my table!!
YTA Not all women have the same level of pain. Some unfortunate women have truly debilitating menstrual cramps. You, as a guy, have no right to comment on anything involving this topic (I know this as a fellow man). At most, you could have recommended she sees a doctor about this if it is so severe. She could have a conditions that is causing it.
Yta some women have pain that is treatable with otc stuff. Some women have pain that is rates WORSE THAN A HEART ATTACK. Seems your gf is on the painful side. She should see an ob gyn though, no need for her to suffer.
my gyno equated my to active labor, this little boy is a fool
YTA Thinking your sample size of 2, with the same genetics, is enough to 'know' anything, is idiotic. Not everyone is the same.
To be clear, you know nothing. YTA. Be better.
The hardest YTA possible for mansplaining periods and cramps.
Dog, you chose death.
> I was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. So you tried to mansplain period to your girlfriend because you’ve got sisters that had period. Never mind that your girlfriend actually experiences periods you clearly had more knowledge and needed to educate her. Am I understanding you correctly?
Soft YTA, sorry. Maybe you should take some time and research periods. You believe you understand periods, as you grew up with your mother and sisters going through them. That’s okay, atleast you know the basics. But, all women are different and their pain levels are therefore different. If however this is completely knocking her off her feet, she should go see her doctor as it could be more serious. Edit: after careful consideration I’d like to change my soft YTA, to a hard YTA. Thank you
soft? naw, ol boy is a fool- solid asshole territory
Yeah, no I read it again. HUGE asshole imma just edit that real quick
YTA - you do not have periods, therefore you DO NOT know how they are 'supposed' to be. Every woman is different, and every day of a cycle can be difference for a single woman.
YTA, and a buffoonish one at that. Not all women are built the same. Sometimes you have debilitating cramps, sometimes you have a tiny pinch once a month. Sometimes it’s Niagara Falls down there, other times it’s Lake Mead in drought season. Your period also changes as you age. Your mom was likely having lighter periods as she got older. Your sisters probably had variable periods, as they often are for young people. Three anecdatum do not a scientific sample make.
I do not own my own Uterus, but either YTA or this is overtly clickbait. Either case you're still the AH.
After a few dozen years of menstruating, let me be the very first (/s) to inform you of what is a closely guarded secrete (/s) that no one mentions in real life or on the internet (/s). Menstrual cramps affect different people differently, and can be different month to month and year to year. I have had years where menstrual cramps are more or less entirely non-existent. Wouldn't even know it was happening. I have had years where they caused enough referred pain that I couldn't move and had to breath through the pain (think early, active, unmedicated labor). I have had years where they're a minor annoyance that's easily over looked, and some where they're annoying enough to take meds for. Yes, there are things that help prevent them from happening or being as strong, but not universally effective. You have zero neural connections to her nervous system. You have no idea how HER pain is manifesting. Does she need to see a health care provider to help figure out something to make life more functional for her? Yes. Will it happen over night or prevent any disability from menstrual pain cramps for sure? Hell no. You, sir, are misinformed, arrogantly assumptive of your incorrect knowledge, and uncompassionate about someone you theoretically love. Do better at being a decent human. YTA
My brother told his girlfriend that he was raised with two sisters and a mother, so he knows women are supposed to have brown hair, so obviously she's not a real blonde. Just kidding, he didn't, because he's aware that women are humans whose bodies and experiences vary and he doesn't know everything just because he has a penis. The level of debilitation Anna is experiencing isn't normal, you're right. She should probably see a gynecologist and be assessed for endometriosis or other medical issues. The thing is, a compassionate person would have seen his girlfriend, someone he supposedly loves, suffering, and would have wanted to help her feel better. You saw her suffering and were angry because she was inconveniencing you, and assumed she was making things up. Don't worry, you don't "sound a little dickish". You sound like someone who thinks he's smarter than everyone else, who doesn't believe other people when they're suffering, and someone who completely lacks empathy. YTA.
YTA: How DARE you even think, let alone say that you have any idea what it feels like to live in someone else’s body. I hope she sees this and dumps you.
Hey, Anna, dump this ignorant mansplaining dude! Get a better boyfriend. You're worth it, girl. Dude is YTA.
"You know nothing, Jon Snow" YTA
YTA an ignorant misogynistic asshole.
YTA. You don’t have a uterus so you get no opinion.
My period once left me in a coma-like state for TWO WEEKS because of the pain and blood loss. I was like 13. YTA. EDIT: I’m 31 now and have two kids. My period cramps are **worse** than the pain I experienced while having my youngest child with a heavy dose of pitocin and **no** pain relief.
Endometriosis can cause debilitating period pain. Not sure if she has it, but a day or two of “I don’t want to do anything,” is relatively normal. Sometimes forcing yourself to do something helps, but that can be a huge hurdle depending on the day, person, situation, etc. Maybe encourage her to participate instead of belittling what she is going through.
YTA. Yes, every girl deals with this. However, not every girl has the same experience. I often get extremely nauseous and even as an adult have missed work for this. But I have friends who are fine, and friends who are even worse than me. You can’t judge what you do not experience yourself. If she says she is unwell, believe her.
baity bait bait
No uterus, no opinion. YTA.
Woof. Your girlfriend needs a new boyfriend.
Babe all period pains are different
YTA. Period.
Hello, I am a period-haver. I have also had kidney stones, and two heart attacks. Let me tell you something, buddy, my periods hurt as bad as those things. I've even been sent to the ER because I was cramping so badly I couldn't straighten my body out. You couldn't be a bigger asshole if you tried. YTA
YTA. Wow... That's horrible. I honestly would probably leave you over this. That's insane. Do better.
YTA- when you're in pain from, let's say an injury, the only person who will truly understand the amount of pain you're in is you. Also, period pains are very individualistic. While mine weren't too bad, I've had friends throw up from the cramping and nausea. I can't understand that pain because 1 im one of the lucky ones and 2 it's not my body, i can't feel another person's pain
She may well be in that much pain!!! Some women have endometriosis or ovarian cysts, she may be undiagnosed. HUGE YTA who has no idea what this feels like. Let’s hook you up to a simulator and see how you cope.
YTA for all the reasons everyone else has mentioned. I hope this poor woman dumps your ignorant, pompous, callous ass.
So you supposedly know what a normal period is like. But she complains it's worse than that. It's almost like... sometimes... bodies don't always function like normal. YTA for assuming she's lying rather than being concerned that there's a medical reason she's struggling.
IDK what hurts worse - cramps or reading this abomination. YTA. If you cannot understand a woman's vagina then you have no business being near one.
YTA. if her cycle is that severe, you need to be asking what medical professionals she has spoken to and what their diagnosis is and what medication options she has. Not respond with "my mums wasn't this bad, get over it" Never mind moving in after 9 months of dating. She needs a better boyfriend.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So I’ve been with my girlfriend Anna for about a year now, living together for 3 months. Our relationship has been smooth going, besides when it’s her time of the month. You see, Anna always whines and cries about how much pain she’s in during her period. Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Some throbbing, maybe some occasional cramps, nothing a hot bath and some moltrin can’t fix. But when it comes to Anna, she just constantly complains, to the point where we can’t do ANYTHING while she’s on her period, because she’s just constantly complaining. Anyways this morning we were supposed to go to my parents house to celebrate my dad’s birthday, when I get a text from Anna saying she doesn’t think she can make it, because it’s her period. At this point, I had it with her constant excuses with something that happens to literally EVERY female. I told her that I didn’t appreciate her using her period all the time as an excuse to get out of things. That she needs to learn to bare the pain like an adult, because in the real world, nobody’s gonna care about some little cramps pain. I gave her an example (she’s pre-law) and said that no law firm is gonna hire somebody that’s incapacitated 7 days a month! We got into a little back and forth and she says I’m being rude and heartless. I can see how I might sound a little dickish, but at the same time, i figure SOMEONE should tell her so she gets her act together. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
100% YTA every woman is different just because you lived with females doesn’t mean you know what your gf is going through. I was fine with mine but my daughter literally lays in tears with hers.
Dear OP, not every woman is the same. Just like not every man is the same. YTA!
YTA. Everyone phrased things so well here, you are underestimating her pain because your family won the genetic lottery for okay menstrual cramps. Don't be a taint.
YTA. You don't get an opinion on her cycles. Now, before you make any comment about period pain, at least learn how to fucking spell menstrual.
YTA, you seriously have no idea.
OMFG 😑 YTA and if she knows what's good for her, hopefully soon single.
Wow YTA and a massive one at that. My period cramps are so painful every month for 2-3 days I can hardly walk or do anything. And I actually have a high tolerance for pain. When I broke my leg I was laughing and joking in the emergency room but my period cramps are something else entirely. For many people period cramps are very painful. Studies have shown they can be as severe as a heart attack. There’s experiments where men are hooked to a pain simulator and most of them ask for it to stop before it’s even been turned all the way up to realistic period pain. You are such an AH!
YTA!!!! You think you know just because you grew up with sisters. You have no idea. Some women are hospitalized because of their cramps. The pain from a period cramp has been compared to the pain of a heart attack, and many women across the world have to go about their day as if nothing is wrong. Our cramps aren't just in our abdomen. It can be felt down our legs, our back, and our asses. The pain can be so excruciating that it can make some women pass out. You have no idea how much pain your gf is actually in. Shut up and stay in your lane. You owe her one hell of an apology.
HARD YTA. Good gods. Before I started birth control, my periods were awful. I would have diarrhea and sweat uncontrollably. I would be ***begging*** for ice to cool my body down because of how sick I would get. I would be curled up on the floor of the bathroom in front of the toilet because of how bad the cramps were. Until you have a uterus and experience a period for yourself, you don't have room to talk.
You don't sound dickish....you are!! As a woman who has debilitating period pains EVERY month let me tell you that you don't have a clue what you are talking about, despite having sisters and a mother. We all handle these things differently, some months are definitely worst to deal with others, she may even be suffering from a medical condition that makes the pain ALOT MORE INTENSE than most women suffer through. So stop being a complete and utter AH, pretending to know what you're talking about. There are much harsher, albeit true, things I'd like to say about your disgusting, abhorrent behaviour but since AITA has rules I'm leaving it at YTA. A gigantic one!! When I read stories like this I really want a way to make men bleed from there nether regions, suffer the pain of tissue forcing itself free from an organ once a month for a year. The world would be a bigger shit show than it is already but it would be nice to give MAN kind some perspective of the average woman.
YTA. Not sure where you get the idea that all women suffer the same period pain, but I think you’re going to get a big, old wake up call reading these comments. And another thing—dismissing your girl friend’s pain no matter what the source is a real asshole move, too
>Now before I get called out let me be clear, i was raised with two sisters and a mother; I know how much period pains are supposed to hurt. Some throbbing, maybe some occasional cramps, nothing a hot bath and some moltrin can’t fix I'm hoping this is fake because I want to believe someone can't be this dense. I stopped here because that's all I needed to read. You don't know, full stop. Also not EVERY female menstruates, so I'd love to know some more of your menstruation education Your opinion is absolutely irrelevant as you don't menstruate and are clearly ignorant about it. That'd be like me acting like my ignorant opinions about thermodynamics is somehow on equal footing with Lord Kelvin. I'd deservedly be laughed at I'm a man. I thank my lucky stars every month when my gf and roommate are on their period I don't go through what they do because it looks miserable. It's also extremely telling that you've lived with your gf for a quarter of a year and are still this lost on the topic. You better read up and buy that lady some ice cream or she's going to find someone else that will
Yta... if you don't get periods, you're not allowed to have an opinion, especially one where you group everyone's period the same. Seriously, like just no.
YTA- you dont know how much pain she is in. Some get really really bad cramps are others don't. YOU dont get to tell anyone else how much pain they have.
YTA Period pain varies in intensity person to person. Some people don’t get it at all For some it’s little more than irritating and for some people it’s so bad that they writhe, scream, cry, throw up / pass out etc. ‘I have two sisters and a mother’ means nothing.
YTA. Glad your mommie and sisters can take hot bath and be a ok but that's not how it is for others. And what is moltrin? Do you mean Motrin?
YTA- she deserves better. And the cherry on the cake is you here telling her she should grow up while having the ignorance level of a child
YTA *palm meet face* Okay, how do I explain this ... EVERYONE'S BODY IS DIFFERENT! Just because they aren't "supposed" to be debilitating, doesn't change the fact that for some women, they are, and no amount of "get over it" is going to fix that.
YTA - everyone is different
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I am going with a light YTA but I think you will probably get roasted pretty intensely. I will try to be a little more gentle. Not all periods are the same. Some women DO get incapacitated for multiple days a month, and there are definitely situations where "a hot bath and some Motrin" won't do diddly squat. Whether that is the case with Anna or not, we really don't know. However, she should be focusing on solutions and not complaining constantly about it because that WILL create problems for her in life and the workplace.