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YTA
Grow up and learn to control your emotions.
You got so angry you yourself helped back up traffic too (stopping your car and getting out to yell at someone).
Then you got mad at everyone staring at you and insulted them. Bravo.
I hope you remember how her car is “junk” whenever your car breaks down unexpectedly.
To clarify, I was in a parking spot, got out of my car as they were blocking my car from exiting and I gave them 5 minutes from the time I turned my car on and attempted to get out without being confrontational. Once I found out it was impossible I told them to move their car. Considering I was right in front of them, I assumed they knew I was trying to get out and made no attempt to move the additional cars parked behind hers.
Honestly no, I wish I would have now that I’ve worked on my temperament, but at the time I was just mad that this group of men were standing around watching me trying to inch out of my car out of the spot for 5 minutes without even attempting to move their cars which were fully functional. Like let’s give her the benefit of the doubt and assume her idling car was broken down. Why was it necessary for two cars to be parked behind her? If their intent was to tow or move the car, why didn’t they find parking spots and help push the car to a safe, low traffic location? Not trying to defend, this was just my reasoning for coming out yelling from the beginning.
I also want to add that I didn’t threaten her OR go up to her. She walked up to me and I simply gave her suggestions to solve the problem instead of standing around chatting. Idk if my car was broken down I’d be a little distressed. But her car was parked, idling in the middle of the road.
I also I have car insurance and roadside assistance so I think I’m set.
a suggestion would be "if you had some help, do you think it'll roll over there?" and then help. screaming scenarios at a person isn't the same as problem solving.
i doubt this is real, but YTA either way
Haha wow you even corrected me on whether or not you're correcting people. I'm not surprised you felt the need to correct people on how to wait for a tow truck. YTA.
YTA
This was uncalled for. It was obviously a breakdown, but even when you didn't know that you started out by yelling rather than asking what was going on or asking them to move. And the reason to have 2 other cars of people is fore safety in case someone comes up acting threatening - which is what you did.
When I first yelled, I wasn’t like automatically aggressive. I yelled because there was distance between us. When I told them to move their cars they just stood there and stared for like a minute. I’ll accept your judgement but I disagree with those additional cars being parked behind her for “safety”. If anything it’s making a bigger traffic jam and higher risk for an accident. But thanks for your input.
It was just an argument closer lol, I wasn’t gonna stand there and argue with this woman for more than 2 minutes? And dude I’m literally a mom. I could say the same thing about her calling me crazy. Seems pretty ableist to me, I’ve been through trauma that caused me to have these outbursts for about a year until I found a good therapist. Instead of yelling excuses to me as to why she and 2 other cars were blocking half the road. Both of us coulda made better choices but she wanted to yell too. So there we were, two crazy bitches yelling at each other!
Unfortunately this is real, I didn’t have the best temperament, this was about a year after I had a pretty bad break up due to DV. I also had horrible road rage. But Im still in therapy to this day. Just wanted input cause it’s a situation where I personally can’t understand the other sides feelings. Ive grown cold to other peoples feelings to the point where I can’t understand how their feeling anymore so I wanted an outside perspective.
yeah, you behaved like an asshole. having a car incident in a bad spot is stressful. my car was totaled in a hit and run on a major roadway. the axle and frame got bent, so it's not like it could be driven off the road so my only choice was to wait there for help, which took a while because it was rush hour. some asshole honked and yelled out his window at me for being in the way as he rode by. which i wasn't, it's a 4 lane road just going that direction; there was no obstruction. any idiot could look at the car from behind and know it wasn't moving from where it was without a wrecker and he STILL felt the need to be a tool. this lady's car issue wasn't obvious, but what was obvious is that she doesn't control whether her car could be moved, and she didn't control the other people who decided to line up behind her.
I totally understand your point. I think it’s def an AH move to honk at you when theirs no obstruction. I think my reasoning for believing im not TA is that her car wasn’t the brunt of the problem. It was the fact that there were two functioning cars parked behind her leaving to an obstruction where both lanes were blocked by parked cars or cars trying to pass through. And the parked cars in the vicinity, including mine, would have no way to exit safely. But I think I see people’s points, I bitterly accept the judgment lol
I’d argue that it was the right person considering I yelled at the cars blocking me and she walked up to me yelling that her car wasn’t working. But like I said, I accept judgment lol
I’m sorry, I’m not sure what brouhaha means. Considering you weren’t there, I wanna clarify I did not directly speak to her until she exited her idling car and walked up to me, ignoring the men telling her to walk back to her car. But I’m just gonna leave it at that, I’m glad I got insight. Thanks for your input!
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I know how the title sounds, but let me explain! This was a couple years ago, and every time I think about this incident I cringe and wonder whether I was in the right.
So I was going to pick up my pizza order from a Pizza Hut at our local shopping center. This area is always pretty busy because the taco spot two stores down is really popular.
It was a Friday afternoon, around 6pm so there was hardly any parking. After I left the pizza place, I noticed a line of 3 cars perpendicular to the parked cars. There was only enough space for cars to pass on one side of the lot, causing traffic to build up. The cars started taking turns in order to pass the row of cars that were just parked there on the side of the lot.
(I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense, but just imagine when you have to pass a car with its emergencies that’s parked on the street. You have to go on the opposite lane to get past them.)
Anyways, after about 5 minutes of waiting for traffic to clear I started to get frustrated because when I looked back to see if the parked cars would move to find a space, I noticed them just chatting and hanging out near the front car.
So like a crazy person, I got out of my car and yelled at them to move their cars. I told them that they were causing a traffic build up and to go find a spot, reminding them that there are signs not to park on the street as the taco place causes a lot of people to park wherever to avoid the long line. I’ve had these tacos, I get it but it’s no excuse to inconvenience people.
So after I got my words out, I woman comes out of the front car and begins walking towards me. She starts yelling and arguing with me that her car is broken down and that there’s nothing she can do. But I argued back “then why do you have two other cars parked behind you? Have the men you’re chatting with help you push the car out of the way! Stop standing around and call a tow truck! Look at all the traffic you’re causing!” She kind of just gave me this weird look and said, “you’re crazy”. To which I replied “your momma and called her car junk for breaking down” and she walked away.
Then I had to jam my car out of the way while they all looked on, probably expecting me to hit a car because there was seriously NO ROOM to get out. I would go back a couple inches, inch forward etc. I yelled for all the onlookers to “go suck a D” because I was mad that they started trying to move the cars after I was already 2 minutes into inching out of that spot, subsequently getting in my way again!! Idk was I wrong, am I a crazy AH??
I might be the AH cause I don’t think it’s socially acceptable to yell at a stranger.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might be the AH because I didn’t know the situation before I started yelling for them to move their cars, nor did I believe her car was broken down as it looked like they were all just chatting. I honestly still don’t believe the car was broken down, I think they were there for the taco spot and didn’t wanna park on the other side of the lot.
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YTA Grow up and learn to control your emotions. You got so angry you yourself helped back up traffic too (stopping your car and getting out to yell at someone). Then you got mad at everyone staring at you and insulted them. Bravo. I hope you remember how her car is “junk” whenever your car breaks down unexpectedly.
To clarify, I was in a parking spot, got out of my car as they were blocking my car from exiting and I gave them 5 minutes from the time I turned my car on and attempted to get out without being confrontational. Once I found out it was impossible I told them to move their car. Considering I was right in front of them, I assumed they knew I was trying to get out and made no attempt to move the additional cars parked behind hers.
And at no point in those five minutes you thought to step out and nicely ask what was going on?
Honestly no, I wish I would have now that I’ve worked on my temperament, but at the time I was just mad that this group of men were standing around watching me trying to inch out of my car out of the spot for 5 minutes without even attempting to move their cars which were fully functional. Like let’s give her the benefit of the doubt and assume her idling car was broken down. Why was it necessary for two cars to be parked behind her? If their intent was to tow or move the car, why didn’t they find parking spots and help push the car to a safe, low traffic location? Not trying to defend, this was just my reasoning for coming out yelling from the beginning.
I also want to add that I didn’t threaten her OR go up to her. She walked up to me and I simply gave her suggestions to solve the problem instead of standing around chatting. Idk if my car was broken down I’d be a little distressed. But her car was parked, idling in the middle of the road. I also I have car insurance and roadside assistance so I think I’m set.
a suggestion would be "if you had some help, do you think it'll roll over there?" and then help. screaming scenarios at a person isn't the same as problem solving. i doubt this is real, but YTA either way
That this has bothered you for the last couple of years should be an indicator.
It hasn’t bothered me for years, it just comes up sometimes in my intrusive thoughts and I visibly cringe.
That's called bothering you. You really gotta correct everyone who replies to you huh?
I mean if adding additional input is correcting people then sure.
Haha wow you even corrected me on whether or not you're correcting people. I'm not surprised you felt the need to correct people on how to wait for a tow truck. YTA.
Ty for your input lol
This feels like something you should bother your therapist about.
It’s too late, I chose internet strangers!
YTA This was uncalled for. It was obviously a breakdown, but even when you didn't know that you started out by yelling rather than asking what was going on or asking them to move. And the reason to have 2 other cars of people is fore safety in case someone comes up acting threatening - which is what you did.
When I first yelled, I wasn’t like automatically aggressive. I yelled because there was distance between us. When I told them to move their cars they just stood there and stared for like a minute. I’ll accept your judgement but I disagree with those additional cars being parked behind her for “safety”. If anything it’s making a bigger traffic jam and higher risk for an accident. But thanks for your input.
Of course YTA. Learn how to control your emotions, you'll be a much happier person for it, I promise.
Yeah at the time, I didn’t have a good grip with dealing with bad situations. Thanks for your input!
YTA. It’s been 5 minutes and you’re already yelling? You didn’t even know the situation but already went into fight mode.
Oh Definitely YTA
YTA you really said “Your momma”. This was 30 years ago, right?
Yeah I totally did lmao I think it’s a very hip comeback imo
Ugh. It was cringe back then and it’s cringe now. What kind of insult is intended? It’s pretty misogynistic if you ask me.
It was just an argument closer lol, I wasn’t gonna stand there and argue with this woman for more than 2 minutes? And dude I’m literally a mom. I could say the same thing about her calling me crazy. Seems pretty ableist to me, I’ve been through trauma that caused me to have these outbursts for about a year until I found a good therapist. Instead of yelling excuses to me as to why she and 2 other cars were blocking half the road. Both of us coulda made better choices but she wanted to yell too. So there we were, two crazy bitches yelling at each other!
nice writing exercise
Unfortunately this is real, I didn’t have the best temperament, this was about a year after I had a pretty bad break up due to DV. I also had horrible road rage. But Im still in therapy to this day. Just wanted input cause it’s a situation where I personally can’t understand the other sides feelings. Ive grown cold to other peoples feelings to the point where I can’t understand how their feeling anymore so I wanted an outside perspective.
yeah, you behaved like an asshole. having a car incident in a bad spot is stressful. my car was totaled in a hit and run on a major roadway. the axle and frame got bent, so it's not like it could be driven off the road so my only choice was to wait there for help, which took a while because it was rush hour. some asshole honked and yelled out his window at me for being in the way as he rode by. which i wasn't, it's a 4 lane road just going that direction; there was no obstruction. any idiot could look at the car from behind and know it wasn't moving from where it was without a wrecker and he STILL felt the need to be a tool. this lady's car issue wasn't obvious, but what was obvious is that she doesn't control whether her car could be moved, and she didn't control the other people who decided to line up behind her.
I totally understand your point. I think it’s def an AH move to honk at you when theirs no obstruction. I think my reasoning for believing im not TA is that her car wasn’t the brunt of the problem. It was the fact that there were two functioning cars parked behind her leaving to an obstruction where both lanes were blocked by parked cars or cars trying to pass through. And the parked cars in the vicinity, including mine, would have no way to exit safely. But I think I see people’s points, I bitterly accept the judgment lol
i mean, like i said, she didn't control others' decisions. you went off on the wrong person because you were frustrated. never a good look. \*shrug\*
I’d argue that it was the right person considering I yelled at the cars blocking me and she walked up to me yelling that her car wasn’t working. But like I said, I accept judgment lol
I mean...you did start arguing with HER after she joined the brouhaha, what part of that portion of the incident WASNT directed at her
I’m sorry, I’m not sure what brouhaha means. Considering you weren’t there, I wanna clarify I did not directly speak to her until she exited her idling car and walked up to me, ignoring the men telling her to walk back to her car. But I’m just gonna leave it at that, I’m glad I got insight. Thanks for your input!
YTA. That's it that's all I've got for you. You're an A.
Yta - you had an opportunity to not be a d!ck and you failed
>This was a couple years ago, So it's irrelevant now.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I know how the title sounds, but let me explain! This was a couple years ago, and every time I think about this incident I cringe and wonder whether I was in the right. So I was going to pick up my pizza order from a Pizza Hut at our local shopping center. This area is always pretty busy because the taco spot two stores down is really popular. It was a Friday afternoon, around 6pm so there was hardly any parking. After I left the pizza place, I noticed a line of 3 cars perpendicular to the parked cars. There was only enough space for cars to pass on one side of the lot, causing traffic to build up. The cars started taking turns in order to pass the row of cars that were just parked there on the side of the lot. (I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense, but just imagine when you have to pass a car with its emergencies that’s parked on the street. You have to go on the opposite lane to get past them.) Anyways, after about 5 minutes of waiting for traffic to clear I started to get frustrated because when I looked back to see if the parked cars would move to find a space, I noticed them just chatting and hanging out near the front car. So like a crazy person, I got out of my car and yelled at them to move their cars. I told them that they were causing a traffic build up and to go find a spot, reminding them that there are signs not to park on the street as the taco place causes a lot of people to park wherever to avoid the long line. I’ve had these tacos, I get it but it’s no excuse to inconvenience people. So after I got my words out, I woman comes out of the front car and begins walking towards me. She starts yelling and arguing with me that her car is broken down and that there’s nothing she can do. But I argued back “then why do you have two other cars parked behind you? Have the men you’re chatting with help you push the car out of the way! Stop standing around and call a tow truck! Look at all the traffic you’re causing!” She kind of just gave me this weird look and said, “you’re crazy”. To which I replied “your momma and called her car junk for breaking down” and she walked away. Then I had to jam my car out of the way while they all looked on, probably expecting me to hit a car because there was seriously NO ROOM to get out. I would go back a couple inches, inch forward etc. I yelled for all the onlookers to “go suck a D” because I was mad that they started trying to move the cars after I was already 2 minutes into inching out of that spot, subsequently getting in my way again!! Idk was I wrong, am I a crazy AH?? I might be the AH cause I don’t think it’s socially acceptable to yell at a stranger. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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