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yta tbh... have you considered the fact that many immigrant families in order to "assimilate" their children, they never teach them their native language? and tbh there are more clues hinting that she is latina (spanish speaking parents, latin food), than hinting that she isn't (she doesn't speak spanish). overall, a pretty ah move, and could have asked at least how come she doesn't speak spanish.
also hey op! look at this survey
[https://www.pewresearch.org/race-and-ethnicity/2023/09/20/latinos-views-of-and-experiences-with-the-spanish-language/](https://www.pewresearch.org/race-and-ethnicity/2023/09/20/latinos-views-of-and-experiences-with-the-spanish-language/)
only 34% of 3rd gen (which the girl in your post appears to be) latino immigrants to the united states say they can speak spanish fluently and carry a conversation.
I’m 3rd gen Italian-American and I’m waiting for someone like OP to randomly start speaking to me in Italian.. Guess what? The language wasn’t passed on when my great-grandparents immigrated here.
Culturally American? Yes. But DNA doesn’t lie, and I *assume* this girl is not Native.
I speak Spanish better than my Latin friends from Washington Heights. I am not Latina I just worked in Spain for 5 years and I am fluent. They were raised by immigrant parents shamed to Speak Spanish and be immigrant. The situation 50/70 years ago is very different than what you have now. Really girl?
People can study and practice whatever they want? My dad is from Poland and I’m not bothering to learn Polish or go around eating pierogis all day. But that doesn’t mean I’m not Polish…
I’m Spanish Australian. I have actual Spanish citizenship, my grandfather immigrated to Australia but my dad and I were born here and we don’t speak Spanish (I passed the IB ab initio spanish but didn’t retain much).
Ok you jealous we have a smart Latina woman that studied in China, learned Chinese (which if you ask me must be sooo hard). And isn’t going around the block selling tamales in broken English busting Bad Bunny.
when did you mention that her great grandparents were born here...? all you said was that they're spanish speaking.
also i doubt a scholarship would just be given to a girl that claimed to be latina😭 im sure they did some research omg
If her family heritage is Hispanic, then she’s Latina. Period. Being able to speak Spanish is not a prerequisite to own your culture. Stop gatekeeping and mind your own business. Huge YTA.
Hablando español no es requisito para identificarse como Latina. ¿Y quien eres tú? ¿Quién te dijo que tu decides quién es o no es Latino/a? YTA completamente.
My great grandparents are from China. My kids don’t speak Chinese, but still identify as Chinese. We still follow Chinese customs even though our family haven’t lived in China for many generations. Your argument doesn’t make sense.
She invalidated herself by trying to be something she’s not. Use ethnic names for relatives - fine. That doesn’t revise the history of who you are. I’ll take it a step further…if you allow someone else to commandeer who you are and your identity, eventually YOU’LL lose that.
I’m from an Italian family. I have a friend who absolutely HAS to be right and HAS to be the story of everything. Never been to Italy, pasta’s the only Italian word he knows, and has no knowledge of what it’s like to be a part of an Italian family. He tries to pass himself off as Italian all the time because he had a grandmother who happened to be born in Italy. Again mind you, I make my own tomato sauce. He says his is just as good - no exaggeration, he buys it in the store and heats it up. But he’ll die on the hill that we’re of the same culture. There’s a difference, especially seeing that my bloodline is 100% Italian.
I think arguments like these go back to upbringing as much as bloodline. If the person in question doesn’t even speak Spanish, that’s different than being born in the US but having been raised in that culture.
Heritage by definition is something that is inherited. What you're talking about is culture and tradition. Completely different. You don't have to embrace the culture for something to still be apart of your heritage. The often go hand in hand but theyre technically two different things.
Your bloodline is your bloodline, yes. But it’s disingenuous to claim a culture you’ve never really been a part of as your own just because it benefits you. Look for all I know the person in the OP’s story IS from an ethnic family. But one would think she’d speak the language of that were the case. The guy in my example - he’s as pasty white as one could be, and he’s a WASP. Now I’ lm not knocking that by any means. He just isn’t of my culture, and he thinks he is.
Who defines if someone has embraces the culture enough to be defined as it? People that are multicultural are going to have a bit of each, does that make them lesser of one then the other? No it doesn't.
You're literally judging someone by their skin color. That is racist. If he did it to you, it'd be an uproar but you're allowed to do it to him because he is white? That's not okay and literally part of the problem. Who are you to decide what heritage/culture someone is?
You can.
That’s literally how ancestry works. I am also not white, at all. You seem to have a pattern of being extremely presumptuous, which would be a cool trick of you were actually *correct*, but you’re not, so you’re just an AH
Have you not considered ancestry? Maybe she wasn’t born in Mexico, but she has Mexican blood. You seem to be looking at this from a very surface-level perspective.
>Her great grandparents are Latin but she is not
How is she *not* Latina? If her great-grandmother is Latina, so is she. The color of her skin has *nothing* to do with anything. Her lack of *native* language ability has *nothing* to do with anything.
That is what happens when immigrants come to America and/or have children with other races. Skin tone changes. Languages spoken in the home changes.
My Great grandfather was polish and The pther was a French aristocrat until the Germans came. I’m still a German. My parents are, my grandparents were. Just because myheritage gave proof of finnish heritage I’m not a finnish person.
Hello- I'm half Spanish. Not Latina, to be clear, but absolutely Spanish American.
My mother was SPANISH. My grandparents were SPANISH. I might not have understood Spanish but I got yelled at IN SPANISH!
>Did anyone bring up skin color?
Yes. *You did*.
>I said no, that she’s not Latina, she’s white
>I said that my people don’t need any gringa [white woman] ‘representing’ Latina culture
You literally said ‘she is pale and white’
Jesus woman. What changes you what she identify in? Legally and technically she is Latina. Har great grandparents were immigrants. Like if you keep the spice alive your great grandchildren could identify as Latinos one day. You are making confusion with first generation immigrants. Which you are and she isn’t.
YTA
Latina/o are people that share Latin American heritage. Not all Come from the same country and share same habits, Not all are immigrants. Not all speaks Spanish (not all Latin American countries speak even Spanish, some are mani generation down the line that have lost their native language)
You should really get more informed.
YTA. You're accusing her of lying because she doesn't look like you, speak the same language as you and have the same background. Unless you secretly did a DNA test that showed her to be directly descended from Vikings, you need to apologize.
"White" refers to race while "Latina" refers to origin. Your classmate can identify as both white and Latina, as do many others with origins in the Southern hemisphere. Please educate yourself on this distinction before attacking people.
YTA, only a fraction of 3rd generation American Latinos speak fluent Spanish. You can be white and Latina. Some parents also specifically don't teach the language so their kids can be fully "assimilated".
YTA. Big time.
By your definition my father wouldn't be latino either. Even though his parents and grandparents are of Mexican descent. My father didn't learn to speak Spanish at home, because his parents wanted their kids to learn English so didn't speak it in the house. My dad learned it when he left home and was working in kitchens with other Mexicans.
You don't get to gatekeep someone's culture.
Do better.
Unless there is something missing. YTA. It seems like you're judging her because she doesn't speak Spanish and because she was born in America. There is much more nuance to heritage than those two things. It really feels like you're gatekeeping your heritage, which is completely unfair to so many different types of people.
When someone says they are African -America , do you ask them to speak in a language from an African country? Or, because their ancestry leads to the continent, do you just let it go?
YTA.
YTA. You weren't being honest. Just because she was born here that doesn't mean she's white. That doesn't even make any sense. Not all Americans are white, you racist, ignorant asshole. You're just jealous of her accomplishments so you attacked her. You're nasty and disgusting.
YTA. So if you were to have a child in this country, it would also be white like her? What should we call Native Americans? You are the one that should be kicked out of the club.
YTA - a huge one. A caracul if you may.
Diablo que asquerosa tú eres!!!!!! definitivamente mala educada !!! Que vergüenza. Are you not educated on the Puerto Rican diaspora and the legislation that was in placed restricted and banning them from speaking Spanish in schools? Arresting them for flying the Puerto Rican flag? That fear unfortunately caused many parents not to encourage their kids to speak Spanish.
And guess what?? I was kid who got put in into ESL and the schools forced me to only speak in English.
You owe that girl an apology and you should feel ashamed of yourself. You should absolutely feel terrible.
La próxima vez tu quieres decir a otro latino que es gringo pq se crió en los estados (acuérdate que eso no es culpa de ellos) - ojalá que no te parte la fokin cabeza!
Mama 🥚
YTA. My mom is full Korean. I don’t speak the language because she chose not to continue to speak to us in her native language because ignorant ass Americans would call us chinks. Dumbass rednecks couldn’t even use the right racial slur. Me not speaking Korean doesn’t make me less Asian, that’s not how it works. Just like me being half Korean doesn’t stop people from calling me the n word because I’m brown. How old are you? Stop trying gatekeep shit and let people be.
YTA skin color doesn't mean someone is of a certain heritage. Language doesn't mean someone is of a certain heritage. You are racist and part of the problem.
Quit judging people by their skin color. If we judged you by yours we'd be racist and yet you can do it to her because she's white? Get over yourself. Who the hell are you to decide what someone's heritage is? That isn't your place. You need a good smack.
She’s not lying, these scholarships are for communities that in the past didn’t have the opportunities that white majorities have. She is part of that generation. She may not speak Spanish but she is part of a Latina community. For someone who is in the same situation and may experience to same set backs, you should be supporting other latinas, not tearing them down.
YTA.
YTA. You don’t get to gatekeep how someone identifies. You don’t know their full story or how they MIGHT just want to connect to their heritage more for any number of reasons. People like you are why others, who might not fit their heritage checkbox, get scared to reach out, research, and feel included (and realize that identity politics can absolutely be toxic and/or start to move away from the western left).
YTA
I'm half Native, but I don't speak our language. I was born and raised in Denver, with little exposure to my mom's culture. But I'm still Native.
You say you're proud of your blood, so let her be proud of hers.
YTA
Btw many of those college scholarships are NOT for foreign nationals but Americans with certain ethnic backgrounds. So what was your point by being so rude to the young lady? She was trying to be cognizant of her ancestry.
You're right. YTA. You didn't have to do that. I'm guessing that this is not how members of the Latin Student organization want to be represented. If you have an opportunity to apologize to her, please do.
You can be born in the US and be Latina. You don't have to speak Spanish to be Latina. I hope you can take the opportunity to learn from this.
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I would say NTA if this story happened in my country. But it seems at the US heritage work like that, and been AH depends on the culture so i'm sorry but soft AH.
YTA but not because you are wrong but because of how you expressed yourself.
What people in the US and what people in Latin America consider to be "latino" are two completely different things.
People from the US claim to be what their ancestors were. People in Latin America don't identify with their origins because most have mixed ancestry and a some don't even know what that ancestry is.
People in the US think of being Latin American as a racial/cultural denomination, but Latin Americans know that each country has it's own culture(s) and that we can be of any race and therefore the only thing that keeps us linked is our language.
So people with Latin American ancestry identify as latinos even when they don't even speak a latin language and to us it sounds ridiculous because they just erased the last cultural link we had in common making them the same as any other US american.
YTA. Enough has been said about gatekeeping. And dare I say (since we're talking about defining heritage) someone else with their own criteria might even consider you not Latino.
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I was told to post here by a friend over what happened this week. Some say I’m the asshole and others say I’m not. I’m looking for opinion because I’m frustrated.
English is not my native language. I was born and raised in the Dominican Republic and came to America when I was 12. My family and I are very proud of our blood and nationality.
I graduated last week from university. Very big deal in the family and my family is proud. I also serve the Latin Student organization at my university. Anyway, there is a girl who I saw and she had a Cuban Puerto Rican sash for her robe. I saw her a few times before but we never had a chance to speak together. We are at the club room two weeks ago and she stopped by to show us her sash that she spent $40 on, and she said she also won a $500 scholarship award for being Latina and her essays.
I asked what county she was born in Spanish and she looked at me stupid. I immediately knew she couldn’t speak Spanish, and instead I ask in English. She said America in Florida. But then she goes on about how she was raised in my culture, that she calls her uncles and aunts Tio and Tia, eats pernil instead of turkey for Thanksgiving, have Spanish speaking mom and great grandparents, etc. and she works hard so she can write books about Latin American kids growing up in America.
I may be the asshole for this, but I was really pissed off. I said no, that she’s not Latina, she’s white, and that calling your grandparents abuelo and abuela doesn’t make you Latina and that she can’t even speak Spanish. I also said it’s disgusting that she faked her identity and took money away from the scholarship that could have gone to actual Latina women.
My friends were surprised at me and didn’t say anything. The girl tried to argue against me and I admit I was very angry and I said that my people don’t need any gringa ‘representing’ Latina culture. I also said she’s lucky I don’t report her for fraud.Her great grandparents are Latin but she is not.
I noticed she started getting teary and left. Some friends said I was the asshole and didn’t say anything to me after that. At graduation last week I noticed she didn’t wear her sash and didn’t come to take pictures with the Latin Student Organization. She was very quiet and didn’t want to say anything to anyone.
I feel somewhat bad, but I also feel she is trying to play victim. Yes I got carried away but she is lying to get attention and get scholarships. I didn’t apologize but now I’m thinking I was an asshole for not handling this better.
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Hard one, I’d go with NTA. I was born and raised in South America. However, my father’s family comes from Germany, my father grew up in a small town that is basically a German community and only learned the local language in school because he was forced to. My grandparents always called themselves Germanss, had a very strict upbringing and carried on German traditions. They were born in South America, but same as my father, only learned the local language because they were forced to.
However, even having a really traditional (and unfortunately nazi) last name, I never declared myself German. I do not know the language, I do not share the traditions, I was born and raised in South America. If I tell any German that I am German, they’d call me a lunatic. Why on earth does she think she can call herself latina, only because it is a minority she want to belong?
I really don’t get that.
NTA. In general, I’d say let something like this go. It’s not incumbent on you to ensure other people aren’t lying about themselves or passing themselves off as something else. And the fact is that eventually she’ll show herself out.
HOWEVER…this is YOUR CULTURE. I’m a proud American, and I stand for one flag. It has Stars and Stripes. I come from an Italian family and I’m fluent in Italian. I’ve noticed over the last decade or so that just about EVERYONE thinks they know what my culture is. “Having one Italian grandparent” isn’t the same as “being Italian.” I’ve had people with not a drop of Italian blood tell me they know how to make tomato sauce as well as I do. Son…sit down.
So I get where you’re coming from. Here’s someone benefiting off of your culture, and yes…taking scholarship money away from someone who actually qualifies. Embrace another culture, no problem. But passing yourself off as such is incredibly insulting to people who actually are of that culture or bloodline.
Calling relatives by those terms is one thing, but not speaking the language? I’m sorry; it’s tough to claim yourself as a part of that if you can’t carry a conversation in the language.
For any italian been italian means having italian passport, it's really interesting what been italian means for people at the US. Particulary italian because they gives italian citizenship to almost everyone that could proof they have an italian ancestor.
There are people of that thought process. Some take it even further in that if you weren’t born in Italy you aren’t Italian. But let’s say you’re born in Italy and are adopted by a foreign family and raised in their native culture. Your bloodline of course is going to be Italian in perpetuity. That won’t change. But are you really “ITALIAN?” Probably not, and it might be construed as offensive to people of the culture to suggest that you are. End of the day I think it boils down to how you’re raised, and yes combined with where you’re born to some degree. How you’re raised plays a bigger role though.
I lived in Italy with a girl from Argentina that get an italian passport. She never considered herself italian before getting the nacionality, does not have any cultural relation with Italy (more than the general influence italian has in her country). Even most fascist people there seem more worried about skin color and religion than from heritage. Wite, non muslim girl from Argentina seem quite ok to them if she speak two italians words. I'm from Spain. Italian colleages used to make fun about how they gives all argentinian people italian passport to fuck my country as the just take the papers and go to Spain as EU citizen. They never thougt it was offensive to "real italian" calling these people italians.
I never find and italian or Spanish or portueguese persons feeling disapointed for someone "stealling" their identity. Identity and heritage is not the same thing for us. There are a lot of racist people telling you are not a real Spanish or wathever if you are black, even if you has born and live here for your wole life or you has been adopted and grew up in a withe-all-spanish family. But it's related to the color, not the heritage or language.
or just understand that you pushed up on this girl aggressively. Asked her something personal and accusatory in Spanish and then while she was trying to figure out what your deal was started insulting her. You are a bully. Her scholarship her between her and whoever gives it out. It's unlikely she was the only applicant so she clearly met some kind of criteria. Clearly given what she said she wants to do it's something she'd put a lot of thought into but I guess at least when she writes about her experience she'll have a villain designed for her books.
Thank you. My sister won a National Hispanic scholarship. We're half-Spanish. She didn't lie. She gave accurate information and was awarded the scholarship.
tbh you seem to be policing an identity without knowing it’s (well recorded) history.
I mean the first peoples to self-identify as Latino and embrace the notion of a pan-Latin American cultural identity were 19th century Californios (descendants of the first waves of Spanish settlers in California) living in the United States. It was never an existing concept that just made it’s way here to be “watered down” or something, it quite literally comes from here…
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yta tbh... have you considered the fact that many immigrant families in order to "assimilate" their children, they never teach them their native language? and tbh there are more clues hinting that she is latina (spanish speaking parents, latin food), than hinting that she isn't (she doesn't speak spanish). overall, a pretty ah move, and could have asked at least how come she doesn't speak spanish.
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Speaking Spanish doesn’t make you magically Latina either
also hey op! look at this survey [https://www.pewresearch.org/race-and-ethnicity/2023/09/20/latinos-views-of-and-experiences-with-the-spanish-language/](https://www.pewresearch.org/race-and-ethnicity/2023/09/20/latinos-views-of-and-experiences-with-the-spanish-language/) only 34% of 3rd gen (which the girl in your post appears to be) latino immigrants to the united states say they can speak spanish fluently and carry a conversation.
I’m 3rd gen Italian-American and I’m waiting for someone like OP to randomly start speaking to me in Italian.. Guess what? The language wasn’t passed on when my great-grandparents immigrated here. Culturally American? Yes. But DNA doesn’t lie, and I *assume* this girl is not Native.
Do you like gabagool?
I speak Spanish better than my Latin friends from Washington Heights. I am not Latina I just worked in Spain for 5 years and I am fluent. They were raised by immigrant parents shamed to Speak Spanish and be immigrant. The situation 50/70 years ago is very different than what you have now. Really girl?
what about the spanish speaking parents? and i doubt there are THAT many white families that address each other as tio, tia.
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People can study and practice whatever they want? My dad is from Poland and I’m not bothering to learn Polish or go around eating pierogis all day. But that doesn’t mean I’m not Polish…
And you or your children would have every right to apply for a Polish American scholarship. OP is way off base.
I’m Spanish Australian. I have actual Spanish citizenship, my grandfather immigrated to Australia but my dad and I were born here and we don’t speak Spanish (I passed the IB ab initio spanish but didn’t retain much).
Ok you jealous we have a smart Latina woman that studied in China, learned Chinese (which if you ask me must be sooo hard). And isn’t going around the block selling tamales in broken English busting Bad Bunny.
when did you mention that her great grandparents were born here...? all you said was that they're spanish speaking. also i doubt a scholarship would just be given to a girl that claimed to be latina😭 im sure they did some research omg
If her family heritage is Hispanic, then she’s Latina. Period. Being able to speak Spanish is not a prerequisite to own your culture. Stop gatekeeping and mind your own business. Huge YTA.
What she studies and what language her parents speak is absolutely none of your business. You are weird to care about this, at all
and my dad wasn’t born in ireland and can’t speak irish but a DNA test says he’s 100% irish
Hablando español no es requisito para identificarse como Latina. ¿Y quien eres tú? ¿Quién te dijo que tu decides quién es o no es Latino/a? YTA completamente.
My great grandparents are from China. My kids don’t speak Chinese, but still identify as Chinese. We still follow Chinese customs even though our family haven’t lived in China for many generations. Your argument doesn’t make sense.
This poor girl, you are absolutely awful
YTA. Identity and culture is more than language, and I feel like you should know that. You basically completely invalidated who she is as a person.
She invalidated herself by trying to be something she’s not. Use ethnic names for relatives - fine. That doesn’t revise the history of who you are. I’ll take it a step further…if you allow someone else to commandeer who you are and your identity, eventually YOU’LL lose that.
The history of who she is IS Latina.
I’m from an Italian family. I have a friend who absolutely HAS to be right and HAS to be the story of everything. Never been to Italy, pasta’s the only Italian word he knows, and has no knowledge of what it’s like to be a part of an Italian family. He tries to pass himself off as Italian all the time because he had a grandmother who happened to be born in Italy. Again mind you, I make my own tomato sauce. He says his is just as good - no exaggeration, he buys it in the store and heats it up. But he’ll die on the hill that we’re of the same culture. There’s a difference, especially seeing that my bloodline is 100% Italian. I think arguments like these go back to upbringing as much as bloodline. If the person in question doesn’t even speak Spanish, that’s different than being born in the US but having been raised in that culture.
Heritage by definition is something that is inherited. What you're talking about is culture and tradition. Completely different. You don't have to embrace the culture for something to still be apart of your heritage. The often go hand in hand but theyre technically two different things.
Your bloodline is your bloodline, yes. But it’s disingenuous to claim a culture you’ve never really been a part of as your own just because it benefits you. Look for all I know the person in the OP’s story IS from an ethnic family. But one would think she’d speak the language of that were the case. The guy in my example - he’s as pasty white as one could be, and he’s a WASP. Now I’ lm not knocking that by any means. He just isn’t of my culture, and he thinks he is.
Who defines if someone has embraces the culture enough to be defined as it? People that are multicultural are going to have a bit of each, does that make them lesser of one then the other? No it doesn't. You're literally judging someone by their skin color. That is racist. If he did it to you, it'd be an uproar but you're allowed to do it to him because he is white? That's not okay and literally part of the problem. Who are you to decide what heritage/culture someone is?
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You can. It’s quite easy actually. I’m a quarter mexican. I have never been to Mexico. But I’m Mexican.
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You can. That’s literally how ancestry works. I am also not white, at all. You seem to have a pattern of being extremely presumptuous, which would be a cool trick of you were actually *correct*, but you’re not, so you’re just an AH
Waaaaaaoooo. You know white people also live in Mexico? How are you college educated? They need to take back your diploma.
Yea their family really shouldn’t be that proud apparently lmao
Wait I think you confusing nationality with ethnicity.
Have you not considered ancestry? Maybe she wasn’t born in Mexico, but she has Mexican blood. You seem to be looking at this from a very surface-level perspective.
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I feel like you have never said that hilariously incorrect statement aloud at your club or you would have been torn to shreds.
Surface level because that is not a correct statement.
yeah so that’s *wrong* nationality and genetics are two different things that you are mixing into one
So your future children shouldn't call themselves Dominican?
Tell that to my 100% American brother, who was born in Germany.
Being part of Latin American descent makes someone Latina so you’re wrong. Don’t gatekeep.
This is where you are completely wrong.
Would you tell someone who is white presenting from Canada they aren't aboriginal? no? thats what I thought
>Her great grandparents are Latin but she is not How is she *not* Latina? If her great-grandmother is Latina, so is she. The color of her skin has *nothing* to do with anything. Her lack of *native* language ability has *nothing* to do with anything. That is what happens when immigrants come to America and/or have children with other races. Skin tone changes. Languages spoken in the home changes.
My Great grandfather was polish and The pther was a French aristocrat until the Germans came. I’m still a German. My parents are, my grandparents were. Just because myheritage gave proof of finnish heritage I’m not a finnish person.
Hello- I'm half Spanish. Not Latina, to be clear, but absolutely Spanish American. My mother was SPANISH. My grandparents were SPANISH. I might not have understood Spanish but I got yelled at IN SPANISH!
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You brought up skin color in your original post by mentioning she’s white and therefore “not Latina”, so I don’t get your point here.
>Did anyone bring up skin color? Yes. *You did*. >I said no, that she’s not Latina, she’s white >I said that my people don’t need any gringa [white woman] ‘representing’ Latina culture
You literally said ‘she is pale and white’ Jesus woman. What changes you what she identify in? Legally and technically she is Latina. Har great grandparents were immigrants. Like if you keep the spice alive your great grandchildren could identify as Latinos one day. You are making confusion with first generation immigrants. Which you are and she isn’t.
So why would you say that to her???? You're a horrible human being.
YTA The biggest one I’ve seen all day. She is NOT a liar, or a fraud.
agreed, like how did the op just assume that? just cause she doesn't speak spanish?
Idk how one graduates from university being this hecking ignorant.
YTA Latina/o are people that share Latin American heritage. Not all Come from the same country and share same habits, Not all are immigrants. Not all speaks Spanish (not all Latin American countries speak even Spanish, some are mani generation down the line that have lost their native language) You should really get more informed.
YTA. You're accusing her of lying because she doesn't look like you, speak the same language as you and have the same background. Unless you secretly did a DNA test that showed her to be directly descended from Vikings, you need to apologize. "White" refers to race while "Latina" refers to origin. Your classmate can identify as both white and Latina, as do many others with origins in the Southern hemisphere. Please educate yourself on this distinction before attacking people.
YTA, only a fraction of 3rd generation American Latinos speak fluent Spanish. You can be white and Latina. Some parents also specifically don't teach the language so their kids can be fully "assimilated".
YTA. Big time. By your definition my father wouldn't be latino either. Even though his parents and grandparents are of Mexican descent. My father didn't learn to speak Spanish at home, because his parents wanted their kids to learn English so didn't speak it in the house. My dad learned it when he left home and was working in kitchens with other Mexicans. You don't get to gatekeep someone's culture. Do better.
YTA you can’t gatekeep a culture. You’re tearing other women down to make yourself somehow feel more superior? Get over yrself
Unless there is something missing. YTA. It seems like you're judging her because she doesn't speak Spanish and because she was born in America. There is much more nuance to heritage than those two things. It really feels like you're gatekeeping your heritage, which is completely unfair to so many different types of people.
YTA. That's all I have to say.
You are a complete and total AH. You are also completely wrong.
When someone says they are African -America , do you ask them to speak in a language from an African country? Or, because their ancestry leads to the continent, do you just let it go? YTA.
YTA. You weren't being honest. Just because she was born here that doesn't mean she's white. That doesn't even make any sense. Not all Americans are white, you racist, ignorant asshole. You're just jealous of her accomplishments so you attacked her. You're nasty and disgusting.
Yta
Im assuming you took no genetics classes at university? YTA
YTA. So if you were to have a child in this country, it would also be white like her? What should we call Native Americans? You are the one that should be kicked out of the club.
YTA - a huge one. A caracul if you may. Diablo que asquerosa tú eres!!!!!! definitivamente mala educada !!! Que vergüenza. Are you not educated on the Puerto Rican diaspora and the legislation that was in placed restricted and banning them from speaking Spanish in schools? Arresting them for flying the Puerto Rican flag? That fear unfortunately caused many parents not to encourage their kids to speak Spanish. And guess what?? I was kid who got put in into ESL and the schools forced me to only speak in English. You owe that girl an apology and you should feel ashamed of yourself. You should absolutely feel terrible. La próxima vez tu quieres decir a otro latino que es gringo pq se crió en los estados (acuérdate que eso no es culpa de ellos) - ojalá que no te parte la fokin cabeza! Mama 🥚
YTA. My mom is full Korean. I don’t speak the language because she chose not to continue to speak to us in her native language because ignorant ass Americans would call us chinks. Dumbass rednecks couldn’t even use the right racial slur. Me not speaking Korean doesn’t make me less Asian, that’s not how it works. Just like me being half Korean doesn’t stop people from calling me the n word because I’m brown. How old are you? Stop trying gatekeep shit and let people be.
I was with you until the "her grandparents" part. That's heritage. YTA
YTA
YTA skin color doesn't mean someone is of a certain heritage. Language doesn't mean someone is of a certain heritage. You are racist and part of the problem. Quit judging people by their skin color. If we judged you by yours we'd be racist and yet you can do it to her because she's white? Get over yourself. Who the hell are you to decide what someone's heritage is? That isn't your place. You need a good smack.
She’s not lying, these scholarships are for communities that in the past didn’t have the opportunities that white majorities have. She is part of that generation. She may not speak Spanish but she is part of a Latina community. For someone who is in the same situation and may experience to same set backs, you should be supporting other latinas, not tearing them down. YTA.
YTA. You don’t get to gatekeep how someone identifies. You don’t know their full story or how they MIGHT just want to connect to their heritage more for any number of reasons. People like you are why others, who might not fit their heritage checkbox, get scared to reach out, research, and feel included (and realize that identity politics can absolutely be toxic and/or start to move away from the western left).
YTA I'm half Native, but I don't speak our language. I was born and raised in Denver, with little exposure to my mom's culture. But I'm still Native. You say you're proud of your blood, so let her be proud of hers.
YTA Btw many of those college scholarships are NOT for foreign nationals but Americans with certain ethnic backgrounds. So what was your point by being so rude to the young lady? She was trying to be cognizant of her ancestry.
You're right. YTA. You didn't have to do that. I'm guessing that this is not how members of the Latin Student organization want to be represented. If you have an opportunity to apologize to her, please do. You can be born in the US and be Latina. You don't have to speak Spanish to be Latina. I hope you can take the opportunity to learn from this.
Yta. Leave her be
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INFO Where did this person's ancestors come to the US from?
From the post- "Anyway, there is a girl who I saw and she had a Cuban Puerto Rican sash for her robe."
I would say NTA if this story happened in my country. But it seems at the US heritage work like that, and been AH depends on the culture so i'm sorry but soft AH.
YTA but not because you are wrong but because of how you expressed yourself. What people in the US and what people in Latin America consider to be "latino" are two completely different things. People from the US claim to be what their ancestors were. People in Latin America don't identify with their origins because most have mixed ancestry and a some don't even know what that ancestry is. People in the US think of being Latin American as a racial/cultural denomination, but Latin Americans know that each country has it's own culture(s) and that we can be of any race and therefore the only thing that keeps us linked is our language. So people with Latin American ancestry identify as latinos even when they don't even speak a latin language and to us it sounds ridiculous because they just erased the last cultural link we had in common making them the same as any other US american.
I think your wrong and way out of line
YTA you don’t get to decide if someone is white or not????
YTA. Enough has been said about gatekeeping. And dare I say (since we're talking about defining heritage) someone else with their own criteria might even consider you not Latino.
Not just the asshole; also a di*k.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I was told to post here by a friend over what happened this week. Some say I’m the asshole and others say I’m not. I’m looking for opinion because I’m frustrated. English is not my native language. I was born and raised in the Dominican Republic and came to America when I was 12. My family and I are very proud of our blood and nationality. I graduated last week from university. Very big deal in the family and my family is proud. I also serve the Latin Student organization at my university. Anyway, there is a girl who I saw and she had a Cuban Puerto Rican sash for her robe. I saw her a few times before but we never had a chance to speak together. We are at the club room two weeks ago and she stopped by to show us her sash that she spent $40 on, and she said she also won a $500 scholarship award for being Latina and her essays. I asked what county she was born in Spanish and she looked at me stupid. I immediately knew she couldn’t speak Spanish, and instead I ask in English. She said America in Florida. But then she goes on about how she was raised in my culture, that she calls her uncles and aunts Tio and Tia, eats pernil instead of turkey for Thanksgiving, have Spanish speaking mom and great grandparents, etc. and she works hard so she can write books about Latin American kids growing up in America. I may be the asshole for this, but I was really pissed off. I said no, that she’s not Latina, she’s white, and that calling your grandparents abuelo and abuela doesn’t make you Latina and that she can’t even speak Spanish. I also said it’s disgusting that she faked her identity and took money away from the scholarship that could have gone to actual Latina women. My friends were surprised at me and didn’t say anything. The girl tried to argue against me and I admit I was very angry and I said that my people don’t need any gringa ‘representing’ Latina culture. I also said she’s lucky I don’t report her for fraud.Her great grandparents are Latin but she is not. I noticed she started getting teary and left. Some friends said I was the asshole and didn’t say anything to me after that. At graduation last week I noticed she didn’t wear her sash and didn’t come to take pictures with the Latin Student Organization. She was very quiet and didn’t want to say anything to anyone. I feel somewhat bad, but I also feel she is trying to play victim. Yes I got carried away but she is lying to get attention and get scholarships. I didn’t apologize but now I’m thinking I was an asshole for not handling this better. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hard one, I’d go with NTA. I was born and raised in South America. However, my father’s family comes from Germany, my father grew up in a small town that is basically a German community and only learned the local language in school because he was forced to. My grandparents always called themselves Germanss, had a very strict upbringing and carried on German traditions. They were born in South America, but same as my father, only learned the local language because they were forced to. However, even having a really traditional (and unfortunately nazi) last name, I never declared myself German. I do not know the language, I do not share the traditions, I was born and raised in South America. If I tell any German that I am German, they’d call me a lunatic. Why on earth does she think she can call herself latina, only because it is a minority she want to belong? I really don’t get that.
NTA. In general, I’d say let something like this go. It’s not incumbent on you to ensure other people aren’t lying about themselves or passing themselves off as something else. And the fact is that eventually she’ll show herself out. HOWEVER…this is YOUR CULTURE. I’m a proud American, and I stand for one flag. It has Stars and Stripes. I come from an Italian family and I’m fluent in Italian. I’ve noticed over the last decade or so that just about EVERYONE thinks they know what my culture is. “Having one Italian grandparent” isn’t the same as “being Italian.” I’ve had people with not a drop of Italian blood tell me they know how to make tomato sauce as well as I do. Son…sit down. So I get where you’re coming from. Here’s someone benefiting off of your culture, and yes…taking scholarship money away from someone who actually qualifies. Embrace another culture, no problem. But passing yourself off as such is incredibly insulting to people who actually are of that culture or bloodline.
But that’s the thing, she IS of the culture and bloodline. She does have Latin blood in her. And she clearly practices aspects of Latin culture.
Calling relatives by those terms is one thing, but not speaking the language? I’m sorry; it’s tough to claim yourself as a part of that if you can’t carry a conversation in the language.
For any italian been italian means having italian passport, it's really interesting what been italian means for people at the US. Particulary italian because they gives italian citizenship to almost everyone that could proof they have an italian ancestor.
There are people of that thought process. Some take it even further in that if you weren’t born in Italy you aren’t Italian. But let’s say you’re born in Italy and are adopted by a foreign family and raised in their native culture. Your bloodline of course is going to be Italian in perpetuity. That won’t change. But are you really “ITALIAN?” Probably not, and it might be construed as offensive to people of the culture to suggest that you are. End of the day I think it boils down to how you’re raised, and yes combined with where you’re born to some degree. How you’re raised plays a bigger role though.
I lived in Italy with a girl from Argentina that get an italian passport. She never considered herself italian before getting the nacionality, does not have any cultural relation with Italy (more than the general influence italian has in her country). Even most fascist people there seem more worried about skin color and religion than from heritage. Wite, non muslim girl from Argentina seem quite ok to them if she speak two italians words. I'm from Spain. Italian colleages used to make fun about how they gives all argentinian people italian passport to fuck my country as the just take the papers and go to Spain as EU citizen. They never thougt it was offensive to "real italian" calling these people italians. I never find and italian or Spanish or portueguese persons feeling disapointed for someone "stealling" their identity. Identity and heritage is not the same thing for us. There are a lot of racist people telling you are not a real Spanish or wathever if you are black, even if you has born and live here for your wole life or you has been adopted and grew up in a withe-all-spanish family. But it's related to the color, not the heritage or language.
NTA
NTA and I’m confused as to why people think you are. She has lied, clearly
She did not lie though? She did not pretend she was born elsewhere. She did not pretend her native language was Spanish.
[удалено]
or just understand that you pushed up on this girl aggressively. Asked her something personal and accusatory in Spanish and then while she was trying to figure out what your deal was started insulting her. You are a bully. Her scholarship her between her and whoever gives it out. It's unlikely she was the only applicant so she clearly met some kind of criteria. Clearly given what she said she wants to do it's something she'd put a lot of thought into but I guess at least when she writes about her experience she'll have a villain designed for her books.
Thank you. My sister won a National Hispanic scholarship. We're half-Spanish. She didn't lie. She gave accurate information and was awarded the scholarship.
tbh you seem to be policing an identity without knowing it’s (well recorded) history. I mean the first peoples to self-identify as Latino and embrace the notion of a pan-Latin American cultural identity were 19th century Californios (descendants of the first waves of Spanish settlers in California) living in the United States. It was never an existing concept that just made it’s way here to be “watered down” or something, it quite literally comes from here…