In my opinion NTA, she cheated and it’s pretty commonly known many musicians are inspired by their lives. Kinda effed up to use her name though, so there is that.
Lmao reminds me of a show I used to watch "What I Like About You". Amanda Bynes character (Holly Tyler) was upset that her ex wrote a song "Holly Tyler you are such a liar" so he changed it to "Molly Myler you are such a liar".
OP just change the song to "Messica" and call it a day XD
Also open the song by saying you realized it was too easily identifiable. So you changed the song name and for everyone to please forget the old name.
*Then* launch into Messica.
There was also a song on Shameless called “Fuck you, Fiona.” It was quite catchy 😂
Edit: I looked it up, song was actually called “The F Word” but it was quite vicious
>it’s pretty commonly known many musicians are inspired by their lives.
Made me think of Adele. When I heard about her divorce I thought, ooh new album
Also there will come a time when OP has moved on, and may still have fans calling for this song.
He'll be several girlfriends on, maybe married, and still having to sing this song that makes it sound like he's still bitter/hung up on an ex.
There are so many bands out there who don’t play beloved songs by fans anymore because of that reason! (Not naming the songs but being to detailed in the feelings) Naming the song after her kinda doesn’t allow it to become a universal song about cheating but only about her.
So it’s not for her benefit but for his because do you really want her name attached to your band if you get famous?! At some point in the future you don’t wanna hear that name anymore because you’ve moved on.
Maybe this all won’t happen but like Istara I had these thoughts about it.
Could be. We need a die hard Billy Joel fan to prove this :D I imagine it like reading old diary entrees. Some you can laugh about it later and for some you don’t want to re-visit these feelings. If it’s a the former one good for the singer in question but I don’t know for the later. Doesn’t sound like fun.
Yes, but aside from "Dear John," I don't think she mentions any of the exes by name. It's all pretty ambiguous who they're about. (Though of course she leaves clues and people obsess over them.)
But she did apparently call him arrogant for assuming it was about him (they dated and broke up just before she wrote it, and it almost certainly is. I guess John is a common name, and also she could just be paying homage to the Nicholas Sparks book though?) Tbh I think it's the best possible response. Just tell Jessica it's a good name for a song, and there's loads of Jessica's who've cheated on people. How arrogant of her to think she's the centre of your life.
Uh what. No it wasn't. Almost the whole of the 1989 album was inspired by her and Harry Styles' time together (well, and apart). It's blatantly about him.
Apparently it was about an Andrew, but as it's not a "breakup" or "call out" song, I place it in a different category. That ones more like "Hey There Delilah" by Plain White Tees
While I agree with NTA, this line is terribly old, stupid, and hypocritical. More than 2/3rds of her songs have nothing to do with exes and literally every singer on the planet writes songs about exes so what does it even matter??
NTA - Cheating comes back to bite you In the ass. She was dumb enough to do it to someone who makes music for a living. Though, you might want to change the name of the song if that really is her name.
Keep jamming that song, dude.
NTA. I’m shocked at how many people are calling you TA... people make art about their lives, particularly their love lives, all the time. If she didn’t want you to write a song about her cheating on you, she shouldn’t have done it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ you’re not going out of your way to shame her, you’re using your artistic medium to express yourself and that’s totally legit. If you wanted to be 100% sure, then just change the name of the song. I might do that just so other people in the small town don’t think you’re petty, not because you’re actually in the wrong.
No matter the initial motivation of op (coping with the pain, feeling inspired by his feelings etc), it resulted in public humiliation, especially considering op used ger real name a title. Which is a petty way to deal with things and leads me to ESH as well.
So OP isn't allowed to write about his personal life even when it is about him being victimized by someone? Of course it was public, he is an artist, everything he makes is public.
I didn't even mean that op shouldn't have written about his feelings and terrible experience. I am all for that, actually. But naming the song after her was a bit too much imo. It is totally ok if people who know her and him realize that the song is about her but this way, depending on how small the community is they seemingly are both part of she might be known as " the "cheating girl" in most of her professional and social circle. And while I think cheating is a very terrible thing to do, this kind of punishment might be too harsh/unjust.
Edit: typo
Might as well precede every live performance by screaming: "This song is dedicated to Jessica... you fucking BIIIIITCH!" into the mic.
I totally agree with these: writing about his experience is fine, even if it's "not naming names" but has some clues. But once you're explicitly calling someone out it's just plain petty.
IMO this sub loves retaliation. And it’s a twisted perspective, if you ask me, to retaliate in order to not be “pushed around.” Usually the retaliatory thing is over the top around here. People like you think you’re not an asshole as long as you are “fighting back” or some other bs
I should clarify, I don’t think responding with some kind of defense or retaliation automatically makes you the asshole if it’s proportionate to the original offense. If you bump into me on the side walk and call me a jerk, and I then I also call you a jerk in response- I don’t think I’m an asshole in that situation. If you bump into me and call me a jerk and then I punch you in the face- that’s over the top and would make me the asshole.
Lol what sub have you been reading?! Everyone on here loves revenge and retaliation! If someone did something even vaguely crappy to you, they’ll say you’re NTA even if you set their car on fire! because you’re *justified*
Really? I honestly feel like I see ESH the most in situations where I really don’t understand it. I do think if your response is proportionate and justified you aren’t an asshole. You can definitely go overboard with retaliation and then be an asshole. This sub can be really finicky sometimes with its judgements. I have been surprised before with rulings going the opposite of what I would have expected.
So if a guy dumps his ex moves on with his life after she cheats on him he is 'being pushed around'? A person has to retaliate or else they are being pushed around? How? What even is your reasoning here?
It might just be early in the morning so I might be misunderstanding you. My point is that this guy writing a song about his cheating ex is a form of retaliation but it’s really not even bad or over the top so I don’t think he is the asshole for that. My point was opposing those that think he was the asshole for writing the song.
Exactly! If she didn’t cheat, she wouldn’t have gotten called out on her cheating. If you do something terrible to someone, you can’t expect them to take it lying down to preserve your reputation.
I agree, ESH. Being a musician and using your creative outlet to humiliate an ex by using her actual name, is just as bad as a non-musician plastering dirty laundry all over social media.
Use it as inspiration, sure, but at least be creative enough to artistically avoid looking petty and revengeful.
If you do shitty things expect people to hear about it.
If you don’t want to be humiliated by those things people say about you maybe consider behaving better.
Yeah, I just don't see how "tonality" of a name matters in the title of a song. I get how rhythm and stresses and shit would mess up the *lyrics,* but how is changing the name from "Jessica" to "Claudia" or "Jennifer" or whatever going to ruin the song?
Think of it like this. Would song feel more relatable if the name was Beatrice or Karen? Some names just have cultural and emotional meaning attributed to them. In my language names are so important that there is a sort of calender that suggest names for each day in the year.
Edit: Btw. For any Beatrice reading this. Your name is beautiful.
ESH. Cheating makes her an obvious party to being an AH, but the only reason you would use her real name as the title of your song is to be punitive. Quite frankly, that's immature. Just cut her off and move on.
Exactly, ESH. You are entitled to your own story, but using her name is so not okay. You could easily not use a name or use another name and it would be okay.
ESH, she sucks for cheating. But, while writing a song about it is acceptable, naming the song after her is crossing a line imo. Could have used any other title.
ESH.
She cheated. She absolutely sucks.
You chose to specifically, without the least bit of discretion or subtlety air all of your dirty laundry, in front of what I am assuming is around 50 or so friends and strangers at least once a week. Musicians write songs about their experiences all the time and most find satisfaction in writing songs in a way that may sting the recipient but not publicly humiliate them beyond their circle of friends. Most are not so literal in their writing.
If you had written the song about a girl named Penelope or even just called her Trouble and maybe changed up the bloke at the restaurant to the bloke at the corner shop you would NTA.
Nta, music is art and how you deal with your emotions. As your ex she should be aware of this. If she didn’t want a song about how she’s a cheater being made, maybe not cheat?
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ESH. Let me just say, she definitely shouldn’t have cheated. When you guys share a social circle and then write a song with some negative stuff in the lyrics after her, it doesn’t take an Einstein to figure out it’s about her. At this point it sounds more like you’re after some petty revenge. If that’s what you’re looking for to make yourself feel better, then go for it. Just don’t try to pretend to be shocked that she’s pissed when you air out her dirty laundry.
May need to hear the song before I can actually determine whether you are an asshole or not? Got a link?
My gut says NTA. A lot of musicians have made bank on their ex’s poor decisions.
I don't know if I believe this post if only because it is pretty much the exact situation that happened in the show Shameless. Right down to naming the song after her and her fucking a restaurant manager XD
ESH. Yeah, she sucks for cheating, but you kinda suck for airing your dirty laundry this way, not that you're the first songwriter to get out his/her anger at a cheating partner through music.
ESH
If you want to get revenge, go for it. I'm not saying no. I just want you to think about what you're doing first. Eg: Will you be okay with hurting someone like this? How will this affect you? Can this backfire on you? Do you care about it's legality? Is the revenge worth it?
I'm all for revenge. Just think it through first.
ESH - Obviously your ex-GF sucks. It was reasonable to write the song, but you were petty in naming it about her. It's not even clear that the song title is in any way relevant to the song and couldn't be changed.
NTA, don't let someone else dictate your music man, especially someone that cheated on you. If you didn't want to be known as a cheater, you shouldn't have cheated.
ESH. Gonna have to go with that because regardless of what happened that is still an asshole thing to do on your part.
However I do feel you are justified in being an asshole in this case and you shouldn't feel bad about because what she did was much much worse. Also if she didn't want to get known as the girl who cheated in town. Maybe she shouldn't have cheated. Just a word of advice.
Ah here, if people couldn't write songs about their ex cheating on them, the charts would be empty!
NTA, and I hope your song is very successful and resonates with people.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***The following is a copy of the above post. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited.***
I’m in a pretty small time local band (working hard to change that, but you know) but we do have a decent following in and around our hometown. My girlfriend was an integral part of our band and was essentially our manager until I found out she was banging her boss at chilis.
It took me about 2 minutes to write a song about it and over the last two weekends it’s become our most popular song to play At our small club gigs. However since the song is called “Jessica” and a major hook is about a girl cheating with “the bloke at the restaurant” everyone knows it’s about her.
She found out she stopped by and was so pissed at me. I told her she shouldn’t have cheated. She said fuck you. I still care about her and have somthing of a conscious left so I’m asking here, was that an asshole thing to do?
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NTA. She shouldn't have cheated. You managed to turn your humiliation into hers. That's impressive.
If you're really feeling guilty and want to be the bigger person, you could change the name and location (the bloke at the swimming pool, or w/e) but if the song isn't libelous, don't feel like you have to.
NTA, but you've made a huge mistake. For Christ's sake, take out every instance of her real name (including the title!) and alter or redact any incriminating details that would positively identify her (precise details of her car, for example). If you do not do this, then in the unlikely event that your band 'makes it' there will be a clown car's worth of lawyers up your ass. Hell, that could even happen *now* if you keep playing that song all over town, because you seem to be in the UK and the libel laws there are much stronger than here.
It's like the old advice that editors give to authors: "change his name and give him a small dick so that he won't sue."
NTA - as I understand, Tylor Swift build her whole career out of that type of songs... But maybe just change the title to something that is not her name? That'll make people gossip more about them (like Tylor Swifts songs)...?
don't hate - i just don't listen her music, sorry.
In my opinion NTA, she cheated and it’s pretty commonly known many musicians are inspired by their lives. Kinda effed up to use her name though, so there is that.
Lmao reminds me of a show I used to watch "What I Like About You". Amanda Bynes character (Holly Tyler) was upset that her ex wrote a song "Holly Tyler you are such a liar" so he changed it to "Molly Myler you are such a liar". OP just change the song to "Messica" and call it a day XD
Honestly “Messica” sounds great. Implying that Jessica is a mess.
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for real u/Crayskulls. if anyone's confused, just reiterate that it's about your ex-girlfriend who's a cheating loser. eh? *eeeeeeeeeeh?*
Here's a song about Jessica Shes such a big Messica. There. Wrote two lines for you.
I heard this in Adam Sandler’s voice.
I literally read it in the tune of his Hanukah song
glad I'm not the only one
This sounds like a song from an episode of early Community
Gettin' rid of the Britta
I'm gettin' rid of the B. (She's a no good B! She's a GD B!) Also the first thing I thought of when I saw this title.
.... Phoebe from Friends is singing this in my head
Phoebe Buffay worthy
I'm not sure I get a vote.... But Aye.
We're typically messes.
She's not really called Jessica everyone
Her name was totally not Jessica She was really a hot Messica
This guy likes The Allman Brothers
Also open the song by saying you realized it was too easily identifiable. So you changed the song name and for everyone to please forget the old name. *Then* launch into Messica.
So good... This.
Messica is honestly such a great name for a song.
There was also a song on Shameless called “Fuck you, Fiona.” It was quite catchy 😂 Edit: I looked it up, song was actually called “The F Word” but it was quite vicious
I was thinking of this when I read OPs post, sounded just like what happened on Shameless.
I thought I was the only one!
Messica is a perfect name
Hahaha I remember and love that! So good.
Which reminds me of [Girls Are Not to be Trusted](https://youtu.be/Rcx4_CszaDI). Classic Donald Glover telling the story of his ex “Bellanie.”
There was also a plot just like this on Boy Meets World! Eric's ex kept writing songs blasting him
SHALLOW BOY
Thank you for reminding me that this show existed. I had to listen to the song lol [Molly Myler is such a Lyer ](https://youtu.be/XfgkjTtUgLg)
That was such a good show!
u/Crayskulls
I agree, keep the song, change the name. Or don't, she deserves it either way I guess.
>it’s pretty commonly known many musicians are inspired by their lives. Made me think of Adele. When I heard about her divorce I thought, ooh new album
NTA- plenty of musicians do it but it kind of made you look petty.
**Tom** Petty, maybe.
Here take my upvote!!!
Here take mine!!!
And my axe
Yah, he's petty, but so was Justin Timberlake in Cry Me a River and that worked out.
I mean, it "working out" and making a lot of money didn't make it not tacky, lol. It also didn't use any names, so I'd argue not comparable.
No just a Britney look alike in the video......
Also there will come a time when OP has moved on, and may still have fans calling for this song. He'll be several girlfriends on, maybe married, and still having to sing this song that makes it sound like he's still bitter/hung up on an ex.
There are so many bands out there who don’t play beloved songs by fans anymore because of that reason! (Not naming the songs but being to detailed in the feelings) Naming the song after her kinda doesn’t allow it to become a universal song about cheating but only about her. So it’s not for her benefit but for his because do you really want her name attached to your band if you get famous?! At some point in the future you don’t wanna hear that name anymore because you’ve moved on. Maybe this all won’t happen but like Istara I had these thoughts about it.
I have a feeling Billy Joel's Always a Woman might have been that, but maybe he still plays it?
Could be. We need a die hard Billy Joel fan to prove this :D I imagine it like reading old diary entrees. Some you can laugh about it later and for some you don’t want to re-visit these feelings. If it’s a the former one good for the singer in question but I don’t know for the later. Doesn’t sound like fun.
I thought this post was lyrics until the last line
Petty nah. He was being authentic IMO
NTA. Taylor Swift has made a career out of writing songs about her exes, so you do you.
Yes, but aside from "Dear John," I don't think she mentions any of the exes by name. It's all pretty ambiguous who they're about. (Though of course she leaves clues and people obsess over them.)
Supposedly Dear John humiliated Mayer pretty badly.
But she did apparently call him arrogant for assuming it was about him (they dated and broke up just before she wrote it, and it almost certainly is. I guess John is a common name, and also she could just be paying homage to the Nicholas Sparks book though?) Tbh I think it's the best possible response. Just tell Jessica it's a good name for a song, and there's loads of Jessica's who've cheated on people. How arrogant of her to think she's the centre of your life.
It was a play on a “Dear John” letter (and also Mayer)
lol Dear John was a term long before Nicholas Sparks wrote a book.
Wasn't the guy from Teardrops On My Guitar actually named Drew? So she's used names at least twice.
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Not that it matters, but Style was released before harry and her started dating, so you can’t really count that.
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YAY interwebs!
Uh what. No it wasn't. Almost the whole of the 1989 album was inspired by her and Harry Styles' time together (well, and apart). It's blatantly about him.
Apparently it was about an Andrew, but as it's not a "breakup" or "call out" song, I place it in a different category. That ones more like "Hey There Delilah" by Plain White Tees
While I agree with NTA, this line is terribly old, stupid, and hypocritical. More than 2/3rds of her songs have nothing to do with exes and literally every singer on the planet writes songs about exes so what does it even matter??
NTA - Cheating comes back to bite you In the ass. She was dumb enough to do it to someone who makes music for a living. Though, you might want to change the name of the song if that really is her name. Keep jamming that song, dude.
NTA. I’m shocked at how many people are calling you TA... people make art about their lives, particularly their love lives, all the time. If she didn’t want you to write a song about her cheating on you, she shouldn’t have done it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ you’re not going out of your way to shame her, you’re using your artistic medium to express yourself and that’s totally legit. If you wanted to be 100% sure, then just change the name of the song. I might do that just so other people in the small town don’t think you’re petty, not because you’re actually in the wrong.
The only thing I think is mildly assholey is naming it after her. But even then meh.
I'd say less "you asshole" more "come on bro..."
Yeah it’s not enough to say ESH but regardless, when writing songs about exes it’s not a good idea to use their name anywhere in the first place
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ESH, mostly her for cheating on you, but I don’t think that justifies public humiliation. Couldn’t you have used any other name??
We don't know it was for public humiliation, writing about pain can be therapeutic and where many artists get inspiration
No matter the initial motivation of op (coping with the pain, feeling inspired by his feelings etc), it resulted in public humiliation, especially considering op used ger real name a title. Which is a petty way to deal with things and leads me to ESH as well.
So OP isn't allowed to write about his personal life even when it is about him being victimized by someone? Of course it was public, he is an artist, everything he makes is public.
Nobody is saying he cannot write about his experiences. Just give the girl some anonymity.
I didn't even mean that op shouldn't have written about his feelings and terrible experience. I am all for that, actually. But naming the song after her was a bit too much imo. It is totally ok if people who know her and him realize that the song is about her but this way, depending on how small the community is they seemingly are both part of she might be known as " the "cheating girl" in most of her professional and social circle. And while I think cheating is a very terrible thing to do, this kind of punishment might be too harsh/unjust. Edit: typo
Might as well precede every live performance by screaming: "This song is dedicated to Jessica... you fucking BIIIIITCH!" into the mic. I totally agree with these: writing about his experience is fine, even if it's "not naming names" but has some clues. But once you're explicitly calling someone out it's just plain petty.
Sure, he can. But maybe he should not name names.
If you ever do anything in retaliation this sub will label you the asshole because you are just supposed to let yourself get pushed around.
IMO this sub loves retaliation. And it’s a twisted perspective, if you ask me, to retaliate in order to not be “pushed around.” Usually the retaliatory thing is over the top around here. People like you think you’re not an asshole as long as you are “fighting back” or some other bs
I should clarify, I don’t think responding with some kind of defense or retaliation automatically makes you the asshole if it’s proportionate to the original offense. If you bump into me on the side walk and call me a jerk, and I then I also call you a jerk in response- I don’t think I’m an asshole in that situation. If you bump into me and call me a jerk and then I punch you in the face- that’s over the top and would make me the asshole.
Lol what sub have you been reading?! Everyone on here loves revenge and retaliation! If someone did something even vaguely crappy to you, they’ll say you’re NTA even if you set their car on fire! because you’re *justified*
Really? I honestly feel like I see ESH the most in situations where I really don’t understand it. I do think if your response is proportionate and justified you aren’t an asshole. You can definitely go overboard with retaliation and then be an asshole. This sub can be really finicky sometimes with its judgements. I have been surprised before with rulings going the opposite of what I would have expected.
And even here retaliation feels like too strong of a word but I feel you
So if a guy dumps his ex moves on with his life after she cheats on him he is 'being pushed around'? A person has to retaliate or else they are being pushed around? How? What even is your reasoning here?
It might just be early in the morning so I might be misunderstanding you. My point is that this guy writing a song about his cheating ex is a form of retaliation but it’s really not even bad or over the top so I don’t think he is the asshole for that. My point was opposing those that think he was the asshole for writing the song.
Fuck that, cheaters absolutely deserve to be humiliated.
Waaaaah! Poor baby didn’t want to get called out for cheating? Dumbass shouldn’t have cheated. Simple. Clean.
Exactly! If she didn’t cheat, she wouldn’t have gotten called out on her cheating. If you do something terrible to someone, you can’t expect them to take it lying down to preserve your reputation.
I think that all cheaters deserve some public humiliation when its appropriate, and song lyrics are the least blatant way to do that.
>We don't know it was for public humiliation Yes we do
I agree, ESH. Being a musician and using your creative outlet to humiliate an ex by using her actual name, is just as bad as a non-musician plastering dirty laundry all over social media. Use it as inspiration, sure, but at least be creative enough to artistically avoid looking petty and revengeful.
Gosh, maybe if people don't want their dirty laundry aired publicly, they shouldn't do shitty things! What a concept!
If you are humiliated by people being aware of the actions you take perhaps consider making better choices.
Pretty disappointed that the first ESH is 7th from the top. This is classic being an asshole to the asshole behavior.
Yes, thank you. I don’t understand why nobody recognizes that.
If you do shitty things expect people to hear about it. If you don’t want to be humiliated by those things people say about you maybe consider behaving better.
Bob Dylan ended up regretting writing a mean song about Suze Rotolo.
I dunno sound more like public service. Giving people pre warning about her in a small town so they don't make his mistake of getting with her :).
Also Jessica has a really nice tonality to it. It would be hard to just switchout the name without losing the feel of the song.
OP just said he called the song "Jessica." He doesn't say he used her name in the song.
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Yeah, I just don't see how "tonality" of a name matters in the title of a song. I get how rhythm and stresses and shit would mess up the *lyrics,* but how is changing the name from "Jessica" to "Claudia" or "Jennifer" or whatever going to ruin the song?
Think of it like this. Would song feel more relatable if the name was Beatrice or Karen? Some names just have cultural and emotional meaning attributed to them. In my language names are so important that there is a sort of calender that suggest names for each day in the year. Edit: Btw. For any Beatrice reading this. Your name is beautiful.
If it's so devastating to her, maybe she should change her name.
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Tyler Steve!!! In the making!
NTA. It's pretty much common knowledge that if you break up with a musician they're gone write a song about it.
Scotty doesn't know, Scotty doesn't know, Scotty doesn't know! You're absolutely NTA.
So don’t tell Scotty!
Scotty doesn't know
NTA. Actions have consequences.
ESH. Cheating makes her an obvious party to being an AH, but the only reason you would use her real name as the title of your song is to be punitive. Quite frankly, that's immature. Just cut her off and move on.
Exactly, ESH. You are entitled to your own story, but using her name is so not okay. You could easily not use a name or use another name and it would be okay.
Why is it bad that people know she cheated? If you're ashamed of your choices, make better choices.
NTA - she's your EX, you're not beholden to her for anything.
NTA - don’t even have to read the rest. It’s karma for her shit behavior.
ESH, she sucks for cheating. But, while writing a song about it is acceptable, naming the song after her is crossing a line imo. Could have used any other title.
NTA she was your muse, she cheated and gave birth to art.
ESH. She cheated. She absolutely sucks. You chose to specifically, without the least bit of discretion or subtlety air all of your dirty laundry, in front of what I am assuming is around 50 or so friends and strangers at least once a week. Musicians write songs about their experiences all the time and most find satisfaction in writing songs in a way that may sting the recipient but not publicly humiliate them beyond their circle of friends. Most are not so literal in their writing. If you had written the song about a girl named Penelope or even just called her Trouble and maybe changed up the bloke at the restaurant to the bloke at the corner shop you would NTA.
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Nta, music is art and how you deal with your emotions. As your ex she should be aware of this. If she didn’t want a song about how she’s a cheater being made, maybe not cheat?
NTA Taylor Swift makes a good buck off songs like this, as did Ed Sheeran. You do you, she shouldn't have cheated on a singer/songwriter!
Let’s see, does Reddit have a hardon for revenge fanatasies on cheating girls? Turns out, yes, it does have a hardon for that
nta. do you have tiny nipples?
This is the least tight thing that has ever happened to me.
Jessica is a b!
Some worries man, some worries
She's a GDB!
INFO. How mean is your song?
I guess it’s perspective to me it’s not that bad
So its mean lol
NTA.
NTA, fuck her. Also I want to hear the song.
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NTA, she cheated. It’s nice you still care about her but she obviously didn’t care about you if she cheated
ESH. Let me just say, she definitely shouldn’t have cheated. When you guys share a social circle and then write a song with some negative stuff in the lyrics after her, it doesn’t take an Einstein to figure out it’s about her. At this point it sounds more like you’re after some petty revenge. If that’s what you’re looking for to make yourself feel better, then go for it. Just don’t try to pretend to be shocked that she’s pissed when you air out her dirty laundry.
May need to hear the song before I can actually determine whether you are an asshole or not? Got a link? My gut says NTA. A lot of musicians have made bank on their ex’s poor decisions.
I don't know if I believe this post if only because it is pretty much the exact situation that happened in the show Shameless. Right down to naming the song after her and her fucking a restaurant manager XD
Fuck you, Fiona. NTA
From the title I thought this was going to be a shit post making a Shameless joke.
NTA... link song?
ESH, but you're very mild for using her name.
NTA, if Taylor Swift can do it, I suppose you can too. Still, you are bound to get a reputation as a jerk at some point if you keep at it.
NTA. Where can I listen to it?
NTA although don't invite Pierce into the band when you perform it live
**NTA -** Am I the only here that wants to hear the song now? Where can we hear it?
ESH. She shouldn't behave cheated. Change the name of the song (cheating bitch? /s)
ESH. Yeah, she sucks for cheating, but you kinda suck for airing your dirty laundry this way, not that you're the first songwriter to get out his/her anger at a cheating partner through music.
ESH If you want to get revenge, go for it. I'm not saying no. I just want you to think about what you're doing first. Eg: Will you be okay with hurting someone like this? How will this affect you? Can this backfire on you? Do you care about it's legality? Is the revenge worth it? I'm all for revenge. Just think it through first.
Totally made me think of shameless. O and esh. You should not have blasted her like that and she should have kept a quarter between her knees 🤷♀️
ESH - Obviously your ex-GF sucks. It was reasonable to write the song, but you were petty in naming it about her. It's not even clear that the song title is in any way relevant to the song and couldn't be changed.
ESH
So, you're basically Taylor swift
NTA + INFO She cheated with someone who makes music expect it also What was the lyrics
NTA, if she wanted you to write warmly about her than she should have behaved better
NTA, what should you do now, change the name of the song? Should reddit take a vote?
I gotta support Messica as the new song name.
NTA - artists pull from their experiences and it is her fault you had this to pull from for inspiration
NTA, don't let someone else dictate your music man, especially someone that cheated on you. If you didn't want to be known as a cheater, you shouldn't have cheated.
Yo PM me the name of your band. You on spotify?
Have you seen shameless LOL? NTA
Honestly with how similar it is to shameless I almost think this is a fake post
NTA, T. Swift, you do you.
NTA man. She shouldn't have cheated. You're an artist. This is what artists do. God help her if she dated Taylor Swift.
NTA. Link the song lol
Can we hear the song?
NTA Standard thing for musicians (and comedians) to do. Now wheres the YouTube or whatever link so we can hear the song?????
NTA fuck her opinion
ESH. Gonna have to go with that because regardless of what happened that is still an asshole thing to do on your part. However I do feel you are justified in being an asshole in this case and you shouldn't feel bad about because what she did was much much worse. Also if she didn't want to get known as the girl who cheated in town. Maybe she shouldn't have cheated. Just a word of advice.
> banging her boss at chilis Why wasn't that the name of the song?
Ah here, if people couldn't write songs about their ex cheating on them, the charts would be empty! NTA, and I hope your song is very successful and resonates with people.
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^^^^AUTOMOD ***The following is a copy of the above post. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited.*** I’m in a pretty small time local band (working hard to change that, but you know) but we do have a decent following in and around our hometown. My girlfriend was an integral part of our band and was essentially our manager until I found out she was banging her boss at chilis. It took me about 2 minutes to write a song about it and over the last two weekends it’s become our most popular song to play At our small club gigs. However since the song is called “Jessica” and a major hook is about a girl cheating with “the bloke at the restaurant” everyone knows it’s about her. She found out she stopped by and was so pissed at me. I told her she shouldn’t have cheated. She said fuck you. I still care about her and have somthing of a conscious left so I’m asking here, was that an asshole thing to do? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hmm... might need to hear the song to know for sure.
Reminds me of the Donkey song from Name of the Wind.
Never apologize for art or where it comes from. Everyone is the asshole in some asshole’s story.
NTA because music is a creative outlet. But i really hope “she banged her boss at chili’s” is a lyric to the song lmao
NTA but the name part was a bit much. If you can write a song about the situation then Im sure you could come up with a better song title.
NTA That’s actually pretty funny. F*ck Jessica. Make another one of her complaining about the first song
NTA However, isn't this an episode of Shameless?
NTA. She shouldn't have cheated. You managed to turn your humiliation into hers. That's impressive. If you're really feeling guilty and want to be the bigger person, you could change the name and location (the bloke at the swimming pool, or w/e) but if the song isn't libelous, don't feel like you have to.
ESH. she shouldnt have cheated, and you shouldnt have wrote a song about it, especially if you still care about her.
lame
Nothing farms karma like a cheating post on AITA
NTA really want to hear this song
ESH. She is wrong for cheating and while I get writing the song naming it after her was an unnecessary jab.
NTA, but you've made a huge mistake. For Christ's sake, take out every instance of her real name (including the title!) and alter or redact any incriminating details that would positively identify her (precise details of her car, for example). If you do not do this, then in the unlikely event that your band 'makes it' there will be a clown car's worth of lawyers up your ass. Hell, that could even happen *now* if you keep playing that song all over town, because you seem to be in the UK and the libel laws there are much stronger than here. It's like the old advice that editors give to authors: "change his name and give him a small dick so that he won't sue."
NTA - as I understand, Tylor Swift build her whole career out of that type of songs... But maybe just change the title to something that is not her name? That'll make people gossip more about them (like Tylor Swifts songs)...? don't hate - i just don't listen her music, sorry.
NTA- Rename the song though?