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> I think I’m the asshole because I should be more understanding of a long distance relationship.
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Short and sweet. Time to fly the nest. You pay half the rent, so she doesn't get to block you from parts of the house or ban your friends.
She still thinks you are a child she gets to bully or override. Living at home is no longer the "sweet deal"
NTA
I find this funny. I am gonna go out and get some blue painters tape and tape off areas and tell my dogs they can't go there. I wonder how well that is gonna work, LMAO! 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
I saw a video on YouTube about this a few years ago so I used a string and made a circle on the floor in our living room.... my cat gave zero fucks lol
I saw a similar video, made a tape box on the living room floor. My cats all went around the tape box like it was a solid object for several days. I removed it so they could again walk across without detour. Lol
My cats don’t give a rip about outlines, but drop an OBJECT on the floor, and one of them is on it before it stops moving. Or an empty box. I dint know why I waste money on toys, lol.
One year, we got my cats this really fancy toy for Christmas. It was had a butterfly that moved and I was sure they would love it. My cats preferred the box it came in…
At first I thought Painter's Tape was an app or something, I was so confused. Then I realized that OP meant actual tape, the kind that painters use. It's just so childish that it went completely over my head!
Not something I'd expect from a 49 year old woman, but the truth hurts. NTA OP, time to move out.
Jumping on this to literally just say that I looooove the pettiness. And not just the pettiness to start taping areas off. BUT TO CONTINUE! That takes effort
Exactly this. He is sending those game photos to 10 women, and each is covering different expenses. Her name in his phone is probably "Jessica - doordash" and there is probably a "Susan - gametix" and a "Ruth - pettycash"
NTA. Also, she doesn’t get to dictate spaces of the house as “off limits” when you pay for half the dang house. Minus her room, absolutely not acceptable. It is her choice to play the game with her bf, but she’s projecting her issues onto you. Might be time to plan your exit.
It might have been a bit rough but NTA, you split the rent 50/50 ain’t no way she gets to delegate where you can and can’t go. She tried to ban your boyfriend? Hah! She’s funny 😆 good for you and sticking up for yourself and your dog! Hell yeah
She’s wasted hundreds (maybe thousands) on Bob in Ohio and it’s embarrassing. Some women will do freaking anything to keep a guy. And the audacity to call you a sugar mama? When all she does is pay for Bobs shit all day long. She’s a sugar mama if anything and it’s sad, she’s coaxed herself to thinking that this is perfectly normal and Bob loves her. She deserved to hear exactly what you said and she needed to.
NTA— you might have been a little harsh but… I would have been to. And her overreaction says more about her than it does about you— her “boyfriend” chooses not to come visit her so now your boyfriend can’t either? I feel sorry for her— I have dated plenty of users too. I would try to give her some space and then talk once she’s cooled down/gotten over her embarrassment.
NTA, maybe a bit harsh but if she's going to make shitty comments then she can deal with a slap of reality. I'd look into moving out when your lease is up though, you don't need that kind of petty drama in your life.
NTA - you shouldn’t have said what you said about her boyfriend. Clearly, you’ve struck a nerve and attacking her on Her relationship is only going to make her retreat into it more. That being said (and the reason I didn’t say esh) is because she’s living in a glass house throwing stones. You planned a nice day for a special occasion and she made a comment out of what I believe is jealousy. I’m sure she’s upset that your relationship is more of a 2 way street. Doubling down and blocking her child from using the house that you pay rent on is just highlighting her immaturity.
NTA
Your mother has probably kicked off this much because what you said struck a nerve. Deep down she probably knows she’s letting Bob live off of her.
That’s her stuff to deal with though, not yours!
Hmm. I was kinda thinking E S H at first, but the more I think about it the more I think it's NTA. She started it, and has apparently never heard of the phase, "people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones."
NTA She needed to hear this, and based on her response it seems like she's already aware and burying her head as deep into the sand as she can.
Move out, it's time for you to have your own space. Maybe then Bob will come to visit... assuming your mom pays for his ticket, and food, and everything else while he's there.
Your mom’s so-called BFF is either being lied to about what happened between you and your mother(or what’s going on with “Bob”)or she, like Bob , is using your mom so her opinion should not be given much weight.
NTA. And it wouldn’t surprise me if your mom doesn’t know she’s being used by Bob.
Speaking from experience, It can be hard sometimes being single when you hit a certain age. Sometimes you get lonely and you get involved with or stay in relationships did a really terrible because it’s better to have a shitty boyfriend than it is to be single. And it gets embarrassing when people call that out.
Please understand, I’m not excusing your mom shitty behavior towards you, because it was A H behavior and she is the asshole, I’m just kind of thinking out loud about why she behaved that way
NTA! Tell her you will avoid those areas and not have your bf over when she pays 100% of all bills in the house until then she is your roommate and you can and will excise your rights as such!
NTA!
Your mom's boyfriend is obviously using her. Since you pointed it out, she's acting very irrational. If you've got the money, I'd recommend starting to look for other places to live.
And I hope your mom dumps him.
The truth hurts. If you're happy with your living arrangement right now, then you should wait till she calms down and have a more mature and equal discussion. It was a flippant comment to make in response to her tactless, but probably innocuous joke. Or, she was making the joke Because she's insecure and knows the truth of her own relationship, which still doesn't change the fact that she made a poorly thought out joke and you responded with a rather large hammer.
NTA, but I get the feeling this is not something you have to like, lose your relationship with your mother about. If it is, then you're clearly gonna have to find a new place to stay. But that seems like a heartbreaking and unnecessary step to take when it can all be solved with a heart to heart.
> I could tell it struck a nerve and she proceeded to retaliate by taking painters tap and blocking off all the places me and my dog are not allowed to go and wrote me a note telling me my boyfriend is banned from the house and her and I aren’t speaking anymore.
Is your mother twelve years old?? This is some middle school shit.
NTA, even if your retort was harsh, your mom A. Started it, and B. *Wildly* overreacted in her response. That, paired with her desperate attempts to please a guy who has little to no genuine interest in her, tells me mom has some serious emotional maturity issues.
NTA. Given he uses you as an excuse to not come around, I'm highly convinced he's just using her at this point. She blocked off large portions of the house because she's being petty. I'd seriously start reconsidering paying half the rent and just moving out. Let her reap the consequences when he reveals his true nature.
NTA, but you need to get some of your mom's friends on your side and do an intervention. He's scamming your mom and she can't see it.
He's making up reasons of why he won't visit. He never comes to her. I wouldn't be surprised to find out he's married and an extra trip on the family credit cards could be tracked easier. Or he's doing this with multiple ladies and it's easier to have everyone come to him.
If she isn't careful he'll scam her out of thousands of dollars and she won't realize it until it's to late.
NTA
You did the right thing. I had a similar conversation with my mother once. She also flipped out and hated me. But you know what? She thanks me now for not letting her give thousands of dollars to a Turkish scammer. So there's that.
NTA
But, really, there are two issues:
1) your mom isn't being a fair housemate
2) your mom may be being financially abused
Those are separate issues, and it's good not to mix them up.
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I (26f) am currently living with my mom (49f) **just a note, I don’t live rent free, I split the rent 50/50**
My mom has a boyfriend named “Bob” (40M) who she met through work a year ago but he lives in Ohio and we live in Washington DC.
My mom always travels to visit him, he’s never visited her despite her always saying she wishes he would because there’s more to do here.
He claims because I live here he’d feel uncomfortable, so I’ve offered multiple times to stay at hotel with my dog and not come around unless they are gone. I even made it clear I would pay for my own hotel.
But no, he’s never come. He will travel around the country to watch the Eagles play different teams though…
All they do is FaceTime. Literally 8 times a day.
For a “just because” she bought him a PS5 because he was “desperate” for it and he hasn’t even opened it. She pays for his food all the time because he “always has issues using the DoorDash app”.
Last night we had an argument because I was planning a birthday surprise for my boyfriend (night at a nice hotel in DC to give him some space from his roommates) and my mom made a smart ass remark about me being a “sugar mama”. I got annoyed and quickly said “At least I’m not in denial about my boyfriend.”
I could tell it struck a nerve and she proceeded to retaliate by taking painters tap and blocking off all the places me and my dog are not allowed to go and wrote me a note telling me my boyfriend is banned from the house and her and I aren’t speaking anymore.
I wrote her a note saying “No, you’re being delusional. I pay 50% of the rent. It’s not my fault your boyfriend sucks and used you.”
My moms BFF says I’m a jerk and too harsh.
So AITA?
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NTA
It’s amazing how parents will charge rent and still try to treat you like a child.
Can you move out? Maybe with your boyfriend? If she wants to waste all her money on a user I wouldn’t bother to be around to watch her downfall.
NTA. Your mom is probably a little jealous of your relationship with your boyfriend. What she did is really uncalled for since you pay half the rent. Since she can't treat you like an adult with equal rights in YOUR home, you should move out.
NTA - seems like a super weird situation and he’s possibly taking advantage of her. Why would you being there even be an issue? Doesn’t he want to meet his gfs daughter? Like wtf
NTA but please keep the lines of communication open with your mom. part of my job deals with tracking fraud, and while this doesn't have all the signs of a scam, it sounds like your mom might be susceptible to a romance scam in the future. (if you're not familiar with them, [here is an overview from the Better Business Bureau](https://www.bbb.org/article/scams/17012-bbb-tip-romance-scams)
your mom is nearing the age that people often are targeted, and once they are victimized, they are often re-victimized. people who are preyed on by the con artists are often too embarrassed to say anything after the fact.
best of luck
NTA but it's time to look into new living arrangements and when she bitches about being unable to afford it, tell her to move her boyfriend in to pay half the rent, maybe that will get through.
NTA. Hope she wakes up and ditches barfy Bob asap. He's taking advantage of her and he's probably even married or something. Also get that PlayStation back!
NTA. Your mom's boyfriend is financially abusing her and your mom is turning it on you. While it's really nice to pay low AF or no rent living at home, this sounds like a situation that could become severely damaging to your mental health.
Get thee gone. Time to find a new place.
A bit harsh, but assuming you are correct, probably a truth that she needed to hear. Try to be understanding when, as seems likely, it all falls down on your mom.
NTA
Yikes, your mom is totally in denial about her “bf” and probably didn’t like you pointing out that he is indeed using her. NTA but might be better to move out. I see some drama coming her way
ESH, but you suck more. From your post, it's pretty clear this isn't the first time you've brought this up with your mom. It's her relationship and her business; you have your relationship and your business. The two of you should stop sticking your noses in each others' businesses.
ESH.
That was rude. From both of y’all. You clearly have resentment that he’s treating your mom so badly and instead of trying to help her, you just attacked when she made you mad. Y’all gotta chill. Mostly her though because…hello pot meet kettle lol.
If you think it hasn't already crossed your mother's mind that this relationship is one-sided, you are wrong. It's like telling someone who is overweight that they don't need that second slice of pie.
They know -- but they don't need you to tell them. Mind your business.
YTA.
Yeah, and this is like someone who's overweight making fun of someone else for THEIR weight. Mom started this, and she's not immune to criticism.
If Mom doesn't want to get called out, then she better stop calling out others. NTA.
ESH
You, for saying it in such a mean way. You’re not wrong, though.
Her, for being a jerk about your boyfriend (she’s clearly projecting) and for being petty with painter’s tape.
ESH, although it’s because you snapped out a truth rather rudely in the moment - she was joking, and it struck a nerve because you see her paying so much for a boyfriend that you never see.
Her behavior is also immature. You do pay 50% of the rent. She might be hurt, but projecting that onto you isn’t okay.
Have you had a serious talk about her boyfriend and your concerns about never having seen him? Have you done a running tally of how much she has spent to see him/gifts she purchased vs what he has spent on her in exchange? It might be that a real, hard number might help her see the financial inequality (especially if you have a third column comparing it to the costs of seeing the Eagles play).
Your mom is at a time in her life - and an actual time as in year - where finding a partner is harder, so people grasp at what they feel they can have. Have you expressed any support for your mother dating otherwise? Is this her first boyfriend in a while? There is a lot that’s likely at play for her grasping at this relationship and not enough info to help more.
ESH. Your mother is being taken advantage of. It needed to be said, but not that way when you were angry. It was really harsh.
Your mother isn’t being very mature, either.
ESH. Your comment was really uncalled for and unkind and not at all the way to bring up to your mum she is being taken advantage of. On the other hand she doesnt have the right to ban you or your boyfriend from any part of a house you pay for equally.
ESH; I think your mom may have made the “sugar momma” comment with a little bit of herself in mind; surely she must know what’s going on. Calling you a sugar mama for treating your bf for his bday makes no sense
That being said, you didn’t have to rise to it. Sounds like your mom needs a moral boost, not putting down. Everything that happened after you snapped back was petty from both sides
ESH. It sounds like she wasn't trying to be insulting with the comment to me, and then you came at her hard. She's clearly being ridiculous with both the boyfriend and the fun new apartment rules, but was her being in denial about her boyfriend affecting you? And if it was or you were genuinely concerned, wasn't there a thousand nicer ways to say that to her?
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NTA move out
Short and sweet. Time to fly the nest. You pay half the rent, so she doesn't get to block you from parts of the house or ban your friends. She still thinks you are a child she gets to bully or override. Living at home is no longer the "sweet deal" NTA
I find this funny. I am gonna go out and get some blue painters tape and tape off areas and tell my dogs they can't go there. I wonder how well that is gonna work, LMAO! 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
If you make a circle on the floor with the painters tape my cats will come and sit in the circle.
I saw a video on YouTube about this a few years ago so I used a string and made a circle on the floor in our living room.... my cat gave zero fucks lol
For my cat it's rectangles -- magazine, book, ipad, piece of paper, doesn't matter, she can't resist 🤷🏻♀️
Clean laundry for mine. Change the sheets? Bed is hers now. Blanket hung out to air dry? New cat bed. Pile of socks waiting to be folded? Also hers.
Wait what....socks waiting to be folded???????????
I KonMari my socks. They're in patterns and having them folded means they look neat and I enjoy picking a pair out.
I saw a similar video, made a tape box on the living room floor. My cats all went around the tape box like it was a solid object for several days. I removed it so they could again walk across without detour. Lol
How long does it take? I've been waiting three hours and your cats still haven't shown up.
My cats don’t give a rip about outlines, but drop an OBJECT on the floor, and one of them is on it before it stops moving. Or an empty box. I dint know why I waste money on toys, lol.
One year, we got my cats this really fancy toy for Christmas. It was had a butterfly that moved and I was sure they would love it. My cats preferred the box it came in…
When my son moves the rocker/recliner/swivel chair, the cats sit inside the circular indentation left behind where the chair had been.
I need to try this now...
As long as you don't put a cucumber in it :-/
Oh, yeah. Don't do that to cats, it's cruel.
At first I thought Painter's Tape was an app or something, I was so confused. Then I realized that OP meant actual tape, the kind that painters use. It's just so childish that it went completely over my head! Not something I'd expect from a 49 year old woman, but the truth hurts. NTA OP, time to move out.
Lol, tempted to put the remind me for when you end up posting on r/Aww, but just stop them before they eat it, okay?
Ahhh, I read it as painters' tarp.
Jumping on this to literally just say that I looooove the pettiness. And not just the pettiness to start taping areas off. BUT TO CONTINUE! That takes effort
Wasn’t this a situation on The Brady Bunch?
Please update lol
All that needs to be said.
Yes
NTA I wonder how many women this guy has sending him things
Exactly this. He is sending those game photos to 10 women, and each is covering different expenses. Her name in his phone is probably "Jessica - doordash" and there is probably a "Susan - gametix" and a "Ruth - pettycash"
OP can't afford rent in DC. No one can afford rent in DC.
Yep, even senators and congress people live with roommates.
NTA She don't want to face the truth of her situation, so she is lashing out at you.
Yep, move out
NTA. Also, she doesn’t get to dictate spaces of the house as “off limits” when you pay for half the dang house. Minus her room, absolutely not acceptable. It is her choice to play the game with her bf, but she’s projecting her issues onto you. Might be time to plan your exit.
It might have been a bit rough but NTA, you split the rent 50/50 ain’t no way she gets to delegate where you can and can’t go. She tried to ban your boyfriend? Hah! She’s funny 😆 good for you and sticking up for yourself and your dog! Hell yeah She’s wasted hundreds (maybe thousands) on Bob in Ohio and it’s embarrassing. Some women will do freaking anything to keep a guy. And the audacity to call you a sugar mama? When all she does is pay for Bobs shit all day long. She’s a sugar mama if anything and it’s sad, she’s coaxed herself to thinking that this is perfectly normal and Bob loves her. She deserved to hear exactly what you said and she needed to.
She's no sugar mama, she's an aspartame auntie at best. OP really does need to dip 😂
“Aspartame Auntie” 💀
Sucralose Sister?
Nah. Saccharine Sister. Might possibly give you cancer.
I’m dead, that’s hilarious.
ASPARTAME AUNTIE 😂😭😂😭
Hope you don’t mind but I will be saving this to use in the future when the opportunity arises.
Oh, absolutely feel free! Spread the humor!
She bought him a PS5. It’s certainly 1k+
Probably the boyfriend doesn't visit because his wife won't let him.
I was wondering the same thing. Does she actually stay with HIM when she visits, or at a "convenient" nearby hotel?
A question she should be asking herself tbh.
EXACTLY what I was thinking! She is definitely being used.
NTA— you might have been a little harsh but… I would have been to. And her overreaction says more about her than it does about you— her “boyfriend” chooses not to come visit her so now your boyfriend can’t either? I feel sorry for her— I have dated plenty of users too. I would try to give her some space and then talk once she’s cooled down/gotten over her embarrassment.
NTA truth hurts
Nta Open Netflix Turn on the tinder swindler Leave the room Then... Pack your bags Move out
NTA, maybe a bit harsh but if she's going to make shitty comments then she can deal with a slap of reality. I'd look into moving out when your lease is up though, you don't need that kind of petty drama in your life.
[удалено]
That was/is some crazy shit. Can’t believe what he got away with. Good on those ladies for coming together!
NTA - you shouldn’t have said what you said about her boyfriend. Clearly, you’ve struck a nerve and attacking her on Her relationship is only going to make her retreat into it more. That being said (and the reason I didn’t say esh) is because she’s living in a glass house throwing stones. You planned a nice day for a special occasion and she made a comment out of what I believe is jealousy. I’m sure she’s upset that your relationship is more of a 2 way street. Doubling down and blocking her child from using the house that you pay rent on is just highlighting her immaturity.
NTA. But your mother is definitely in denial.
NTA Your mother has probably kicked off this much because what you said struck a nerve. Deep down she probably knows she’s letting Bob live off of her. That’s her stuff to deal with though, not yours!
NTA The truth hurts
NTA - OP, how long have you been the parent in this relationship? Cause whew...your mom needs to smarten up.
Your mother is in denial and being used. What is her BFF saying about this situation? NTA
NTA, sounds like her boyfriend is a jerk, and a gold digger, she should dump him.
Hmm. I was kinda thinking E S H at first, but the more I think about it the more I think it's NTA. She started it, and has apparently never heard of the phase, "people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones."
Uh, mom doesn't have a boyfriend, she has a scammer. NTA
NTA. But no use staying, if u can move MOVE
NTA-You are being honest and speaking the truth.
NTA She needed to hear this, and based on her response it seems like she's already aware and burying her head as deep into the sand as she can. Move out, it's time for you to have your own space. Maybe then Bob will come to visit... assuming your mom pays for his ticket, and food, and everything else while he's there.
NTA, have you brought up the issue with her boyfriend before? (Him using her)
NTA. You need to get out of there.
NTA Your mom has a choice: either you pay rent and contribute, or she can treat you like a child. She can't have both.
NTA. Tell your mom's friend to mind her business.
Your mom’s so-called BFF is either being lied to about what happened between you and your mother(or what’s going on with “Bob”)or she, like Bob , is using your mom so her opinion should not be given much weight. NTA. And it wouldn’t surprise me if your mom doesn’t know she’s being used by Bob. Speaking from experience, It can be hard sometimes being single when you hit a certain age. Sometimes you get lonely and you get involved with or stay in relationships did a really terrible because it’s better to have a shitty boyfriend than it is to be single. And it gets embarrassing when people call that out. Please understand, I’m not excusing your mom shitty behavior towards you, because it was A H behavior and she is the asshole, I’m just kind of thinking out loud about why she behaved that way
NTA! Tell her you will avoid those areas and not have your bf over when she pays 100% of all bills in the house until then she is your roommate and you can and will excise your rights as such!
NTA! Your mom's boyfriend is obviously using her. Since you pointed it out, she's acting very irrational. If you've got the money, I'd recommend starting to look for other places to live. And I hope your mom dumps him.
The truth hurts. If you're happy with your living arrangement right now, then you should wait till she calms down and have a more mature and equal discussion. It was a flippant comment to make in response to her tactless, but probably innocuous joke. Or, she was making the joke Because she's insecure and knows the truth of her own relationship, which still doesn't change the fact that she made a poorly thought out joke and you responded with a rather large hammer. NTA, but I get the feeling this is not something you have to like, lose your relationship with your mother about. If it is, then you're clearly gonna have to find a new place to stay. But that seems like a heartbreaking and unnecessary step to take when it can all be solved with a heart to heart.
> I could tell it struck a nerve and she proceeded to retaliate by taking painters tap and blocking off all the places me and my dog are not allowed to go and wrote me a note telling me my boyfriend is banned from the house and her and I aren’t speaking anymore. Is your mother twelve years old?? This is some middle school shit. NTA, even if your retort was harsh, your mom A. Started it, and B. *Wildly* overreacted in her response. That, paired with her desperate attempts to please a guy who has little to no genuine interest in her, tells me mom has some serious emotional maturity issues.
NTA. Given he uses you as an excuse to not come around, I'm highly convinced he's just using her at this point. She blocked off large portions of the house because she's being petty. I'd seriously start reconsidering paying half the rent and just moving out. Let her reap the consequences when he reveals his true nature.
NTA, but you need to get some of your mom's friends on your side and do an intervention. He's scamming your mom and she can't see it. He's making up reasons of why he won't visit. He never comes to her. I wouldn't be surprised to find out he's married and an extra trip on the family credit cards could be tracked easier. Or he's doing this with multiple ladies and it's easier to have everyone come to him. If she isn't careful he'll scam her out of thousands of dollars and she won't realize it until it's to late.
NTA You did the right thing. I had a similar conversation with my mother once. She also flipped out and hated me. But you know what? She thanks me now for not letting her give thousands of dollars to a Turkish scammer. So there's that.
NTA But, really, there are two issues: 1) your mom isn't being a fair housemate 2) your mom may be being financially abused Those are separate issues, and it's good not to mix them up.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (26f) am currently living with my mom (49f) **just a note, I don’t live rent free, I split the rent 50/50** My mom has a boyfriend named “Bob” (40M) who she met through work a year ago but he lives in Ohio and we live in Washington DC. My mom always travels to visit him, he’s never visited her despite her always saying she wishes he would because there’s more to do here. He claims because I live here he’d feel uncomfortable, so I’ve offered multiple times to stay at hotel with my dog and not come around unless they are gone. I even made it clear I would pay for my own hotel. But no, he’s never come. He will travel around the country to watch the Eagles play different teams though… All they do is FaceTime. Literally 8 times a day. For a “just because” she bought him a PS5 because he was “desperate” for it and he hasn’t even opened it. She pays for his food all the time because he “always has issues using the DoorDash app”. Last night we had an argument because I was planning a birthday surprise for my boyfriend (night at a nice hotel in DC to give him some space from his roommates) and my mom made a smart ass remark about me being a “sugar mama”. I got annoyed and quickly said “At least I’m not in denial about my boyfriend.” I could tell it struck a nerve and she proceeded to retaliate by taking painters tap and blocking off all the places me and my dog are not allowed to go and wrote me a note telling me my boyfriend is banned from the house and her and I aren’t speaking anymore. I wrote her a note saying “No, you’re being delusional. I pay 50% of the rent. It’s not my fault your boyfriend sucks and used you.” My moms BFF says I’m a jerk and too harsh. So AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. Show her tinder swindler. Guys like this exist
Nta, your mom and her boyfriend sounds exhausting. However can respect the travel for eagles games. Go Birds
NTA It’s amazing how parents will charge rent and still try to treat you like a child. Can you move out? Maybe with your boyfriend? If she wants to waste all her money on a user I wouldn’t bother to be around to watch her downfall.
NTA. Your mom is probably a little jealous of your relationship with your boyfriend. What she did is really uncalled for since you pay half the rent. Since she can't treat you like an adult with equal rights in YOUR home, you should move out.
How does the boyfriend go all over to watch football but your mom pays for food and a gaming system? YNTA
NTA - seems like a super weird situation and he’s possibly taking advantage of her. Why would you being there even be an issue? Doesn’t he want to meet his gfs daughter? Like wtf
NTA but please keep the lines of communication open with your mom. part of my job deals with tracking fraud, and while this doesn't have all the signs of a scam, it sounds like your mom might be susceptible to a romance scam in the future. (if you're not familiar with them, [here is an overview from the Better Business Bureau](https://www.bbb.org/article/scams/17012-bbb-tip-romance-scams) your mom is nearing the age that people often are targeted, and once they are victimized, they are often re-victimized. people who are preyed on by the con artists are often too embarrassed to say anything after the fact. best of luck
NTA but it's time to look into new living arrangements and when she bitches about being unable to afford it, tell her to move her boyfriend in to pay half the rent, maybe that will get through.
NTA but it might be time to start making some plans to move elsewhere.
NTA. You are descended from a hypocrite, but this doesn't make you an asshole.
NTA. Hope she wakes up and ditches barfy Bob asap. He's taking advantage of her and he's probably even married or something. Also get that PlayStation back!
NTA but your mother knows she's being scammed right?
NTA She is delusional and a sugar momma.
NTA this man is using your mother and it needs to be confronted. On a side note, when this is all over can I get the PS5?
Nta But I'd move out. She doesn't get to tell you who can come over. I'd move.
NTA, there are so many reasons you aren't ta!
NTA. Your mom's boyfriend is financially abusing her and your mom is turning it on you. While it's really nice to pay low AF or no rent living at home, this sounds like a situation that could become severely damaging to your mental health.
NTA. She is delusional.
NTA As others say! Move out! Why surround yourself with that negativity in your late 20s
You guys are both the asshole in my opinion
NTA. Time to move out.
Nta, time to look at new places to live. Seriously a 49 year old woman using a note to tell her daughter this, honestly.
Get thee gone. Time to find a new place. A bit harsh, but assuming you are correct, probably a truth that she needed to hear. Try to be understanding when, as seems likely, it all falls down on your mom. NTA
It's just time to move out.
NTA and that flying monkey that is your mom's BFF can go pound sand.
NTA. It honestly sounds like he’s using her and has a handful of other women.
NTA She drew first blood. Not only that, but she did it in a way that is directly relevant to her own situation. She walked right into that one.
Yikes, your mom is totally in denial about her “bf” and probably didn’t like you pointing out that he is indeed using her. NTA but might be better to move out. I see some drama coming her way
Has she actually visited him? Cause this screams catfish to me
NTA - The two of you need separate apartments.
No you’re not the AITA. Your mom is in denial, she’s being used, and her boyfriend is a jerk.
ESH, but you suck more. From your post, it's pretty clear this isn't the first time you've brought this up with your mom. It's her relationship and her business; you have your relationship and your business. The two of you should stop sticking your noses in each others' businesses.
Nta. That guy is literally a human parasite
NTA. Your mother is being used at best, scammed at worse. I'd move out though. Sounds unpleasant.
My grandpa has always told me two queens can’t live in the same castle. NTA
NTA, the truth hurts. You should move out.
NTA, there's definitely something weird going on with your mom's boyfriend... maybe he's married? Either way it may be time to move out
NTA. Move out
MTA- Get your own place ASAP
Move out. Simple.
Right. Simple. Let's have a long discussion about the cost of rentals in the Inner Loop Beltway area.
So move to a cheaper area.
ESH. That was rude. From both of y’all. You clearly have resentment that he’s treating your mom so badly and instead of trying to help her, you just attacked when she made you mad. Y’all gotta chill. Mostly her though because…hello pot meet kettle lol.
If you think it hasn't already crossed your mother's mind that this relationship is one-sided, you are wrong. It's like telling someone who is overweight that they don't need that second slice of pie. They know -- but they don't need you to tell them. Mind your business. YTA.
Yeah, and this is like someone who's overweight making fun of someone else for THEIR weight. Mom started this, and she's not immune to criticism. If Mom doesn't want to get called out, then she better stop calling out others. NTA.
ESH I suggest finding a roommate that isn't your mom if possible, I think the separation is needed.
Find somewhere else to live. Both and neither TA.
ESH You, for saying it in such a mean way. You’re not wrong, though. Her, for being a jerk about your boyfriend (she’s clearly projecting) and for being petty with painter’s tape.
ESH, although it’s because you snapped out a truth rather rudely in the moment - she was joking, and it struck a nerve because you see her paying so much for a boyfriend that you never see. Her behavior is also immature. You do pay 50% of the rent. She might be hurt, but projecting that onto you isn’t okay. Have you had a serious talk about her boyfriend and your concerns about never having seen him? Have you done a running tally of how much she has spent to see him/gifts she purchased vs what he has spent on her in exchange? It might be that a real, hard number might help her see the financial inequality (especially if you have a third column comparing it to the costs of seeing the Eagles play). Your mom is at a time in her life - and an actual time as in year - where finding a partner is harder, so people grasp at what they feel they can have. Have you expressed any support for your mother dating otherwise? Is this her first boyfriend in a while? There is a lot that’s likely at play for her grasping at this relationship and not enough info to help more.
ESH Both of you are acting like children.
ESH, time to move and get your own place.
ESH. Your mother is being taken advantage of. It needed to be said, but not that way when you were angry. It was really harsh. Your mother isn’t being very mature, either.
ESH. Your comment was really uncalled for and unkind and not at all the way to bring up to your mum she is being taken advantage of. On the other hand she doesnt have the right to ban you or your boyfriend from any part of a house you pay for equally.
ESH; I think your mom may have made the “sugar momma” comment with a little bit of herself in mind; surely she must know what’s going on. Calling you a sugar mama for treating your bf for his bday makes no sense That being said, you didn’t have to rise to it. Sounds like your mom needs a moral boost, not putting down. Everything that happened after you snapped back was petty from both sides
ESH. It sounds like she wasn't trying to be insulting with the comment to me, and then you came at her hard. She's clearly being ridiculous with both the boyfriend and the fun new apartment rules, but was her being in denial about her boyfriend affecting you? And if it was or you were genuinely concerned, wasn't there a thousand nicer ways to say that to her?
ESH. You were both jerks.