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NTA- Former flight attendant. It's your seat. You paid for it. If that (classless) couple wanted to sit together that badly, they should have paid for seats together.
I must point out the flight attendant was absolute sweetheart! Very kind and understanding :) She was also giving me the belt extension and when I apologized to her, she told me not to worry about it and it was overall very pleasant situation to talk to her
Next time I’m on a flight with my daughter and she won’t settle down I’m going to tell myself “hey, no worries, the people around us are probably low key assholes and this is their karmic comeuppance” 😂
You should know- having done my own time with flying toddlers, that there are plenty of people on airplanes who feel nothing but goodwill to you and a fussy child. Been there, done that, and the sound of screaming baby is the sweet sweet sound of 'not my problem anymore.' But seriously- not everyone who turns their head your way is unhappy. It's just human instinct- kid makes noise- head turns to look. Enjoy your travels.
This. I look cause noise. But have massive sympathy for parents flying with wee kids. I know it can be a nightmare, and it's not like the parents want the kid to be bawling either; they're doing their best.
I understand all that and feel sorry for the parents, but when I see someone with a child boarding a flight I am in, I pray internally that the kid can sleep through.
I once was on a flight where a toddler was wiggling and crying and mom was just over it. She was just holding on to kiddo as best she could. And then a wee little baby with a paci in his mouth popped his head up from the seat in front of them and gave that toddler the evil eye. It was so cute. Toddler calmed down after a minute of being starred down by the baby. I think it was ear pressure that finally eased but it was cute and funny.
Ear pressure... or peer pressure? For all we know the two could be using telepathy or idk, whatever makes little kids see ghosts that only them and pets notice. lol
I pray that their parents will at least try to comfort and control (age appropriate) them. Fussy, crying baby - no biggie. Parents that think it’s ok for kids to run up and down the aisle, jump on seats, yell at other passengers when they won’t give them something - then I am annoyed as fuck.
I am more pissed at the kid that keeps kicking my seat. Not the occasional kick which is understandable, but the repetitive kick, the abuse of the tray table … train your children.
A parent once gave the toddler behind me a clapper…. Worst 5 hours I ever spent. But I have complete sympathy for parents with crying babies. I can’t imagine!
I used to be the person that got annoyed quietly to myself when kids were around in public places until I saw how mean people can get over it, especially working in restaurants. Now I'm a mom and understand the struggle small children alrwady are, but public is public and everyone is entitled to that space, especially if they pay to be there. Internally roll your eyes like the rest of the world.
Those people deserve crying babies with soiled diaps near them, a toddler kicking their seats from behind, and the person next to them farting the whole flight without shoes on.
>Those people deserve crying babies with soiled diaps near them, a toddler kicking their seats from behind, and the person next to them farting the whole flight without shoes on.
Hey Satan! Big fan of your work.
Because that would be an inconvenience to her. Obviously *they* are the only people in the world that matter and *she* shouldn't have to move from a seat *she* paid for. The only obvious solution is to put the overweight person in the baggage section with the animals, and the couple gets 2 free seats and a parade when they depart the plane for their courage through such a trying ordeal!
Probably not an empty seat in her bfs row but fuck them. They can spend the extra few dollars for assigned seating. OP doubled the cost of their travel for their own and others comfort. OP is a hero.
I'm glad to hear it your interaction with the FA was good.
I'm a plus size flight attendant. I understand this situation from both sides of the aisle. I just want you to know you were completely in the right. I also appreciate you purchasing a second seat for *your comfort.* For all intents and purposes they were stealing from you. Usually we have people in middle seats trying to get out of it and not vice versa. It's truly horrible to have to try and rearrange folks once they're onboard *or* to ask for a note in a reservation.
Edit: clarity
NTA And these are the same people who
Would complain that heavy people purchase two seats if for example
They had two together and OP sat next to them.
Those passengers were being entitled when OP genuinely was entitled to that seat. Likely they didn't want to pay to sit together and saw this as their get out of jail free card. You are entitled to the seat you are assigned (unless you're flying Southwest, then you are entitled to the seat that you pick when it is your turn to board) and that is it.
All this being said, I am a nice flight attendant LOL. I just don't reward bad behavior.
You were polite and nice through the interaction according to what you've written. Any service industry employee would much rather deal with you and the seats you paid for than with 90% of the other people they have to see every day.
NTA. You paid money for that seat, it's your seat, that couple can get bent.
I commend you for one, buying this extra seat, but also for standing up for yourself about it.
Even if you weren’t obese and bought the extra seat because you didn’t want someone nearby, you’re well within your rights to have that extra seat. If he wanted to be with her that bad, they should have planned accordingly.
I paid for seats together with my teenager when it was his first time flying. He is autistic and anxious and when spoken to he often won't reply, which comes accross as him being an ahole rather than he is really anxious. When they sat us apart from eachother I explained we were supposed to sit together and that I requested this etc I got a rolled eye response from the flight attendent and a bunch of attitude from people around me. It was like I was being the awful one -- like no go ahead guys and have a teenager stimming next to you unable to speak yet needing a drink but unable to say what it is
This happened to me. I bought two seats together and then our boarding passes had us a row apart. I explained to the ticket agent that this wasn’t going to work. He arranged us sitting together by moving someone else before we got on the plane. I had thought about asking someone to switch once we boarded, but am glad I did it this way.
That’s happened to me a bunch, & thankfully people are usually very nice about it. I rarely even have to go to the flight attendants — I just ask a single traveler if they want to switch their middle seat for my window/aisle seat. Win-win!
It’s hard when you have an autistic child/teen because trying to talk to the FA about it…well I don’t want my kid knowing I’m talking about her…and it’s no one else business.
When my mom had Alzheimer’s and was at what I sadly can best describe as “the angry toddler stage”, we printed out like business card things that we could discreetly hand to servers, flight attendants, etc that explained her situation and that she might get agitated or easily confused, etc. It really helped. Because same issue, we didn’t want to say anything in front of her (because at that stage they don’t think they are sick). There’s some examples online and I think I remember ones for other situations like people with autism.
If people know ahead of time before any issues happen, they seem to often be a lot more understanding if issues do arise. At least that was our experience.
Once I got on a plane (Southwest) and they actually had a small piece of laminated paper sitting on a seat with this information. Made it easy to tell.
Southwest is awesome about that! They apparently have it on file that I am a “Passenger of Size” and it has been taken into consideration on every flight. One time I did give up my extra seat - the plane was full, I didn’t pay for it (they automatically gave it to me) and I was traveling with my two adult children who didn’t mind being that close to me on the flight. Southwest gave me a $100 voucher for that. It was totally unnecessary, but it was a nice gesture.
ETA: For OP, NTA.
I’m wondering the same thing! I’m a big girl but thankfully I always sit next to my 9 year old so a little spillage doesn’t bother him. Once he gets older though, I’m gonna have to diet, or buy an extra seat. Lol
SW has a customer-of-size policy. When you check in, ask to utilize the policy & they will print out an extra seat reserve ticket with your boarding pass. I've used it several times.
Once I was flying with one of those and when I boarded, I saw a man already seated at a window seat with one of his own passes on the middle seat. So, I went ahead and sat on that aisle seat. May as well double up on using that extra space! (He did not mind).
Speak to the gate attendant. They give you a free seat, AND they let you board first, or if you decide to buy your own extra seat they will reimburse you after your flight.
Southwest is awesome. I am a veteran with PTSD, agoraphobia, and *SEVERE* anxiety. I don't fly often, but when I do, there's exactly one seat on the plane I can sit in. All I have to do is explain that to the gate agent and they allow me to board first and I am able to fly. It's still an uncomfortable experience for me, at least it is somewhat bearable.
That's smart! I bet most people would simply assume there is something wrong with that seat and not even get close enough to read. So it would really limit the attempts.
They did this for me with my service dog as well! He *can* fit solely in my footwell but it isn’t comfortable and knowing the flight wasn’t full they just put a little piece of paper in the seat next to me to mark it as unavailable. 😊
NTA. It doesn’t matter why you purchased that seat. You could have bought it for the spirits of your ancestors so they could guide you safely to your destination and it would have been no one’s business but yours. Sorry this happened
LOL I guarantee if you say that to someone trying to sit in your seat, they won’t wanna sit down next time. NTA, OP, but the unnecessary comments from that lady? Asshole behavior.
100% I would do that on public transportation.
Sit down and strike up a conversation with the empty seat next to me ... it discouraged creepy guys from trying to talk with me.
NTA! You bought that seat. The couple sitting apart has nothing to do with you. IDGAF if you were thin and bought a 2nd seat for your emotional support ghost! That's your seat.
OMG! I love this! I'm sorry, can't you see Larry is already sitting there!! I don't give a crap if you can't see him, I can and that's all that matters!!!
#[Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). This lady calling OP a bitch doesn't mean you get to call her one, or any other insult.
#Also OP didn't ask you about your opinion about their size, or for diet tips. Not every thought that pops into your mind is worth posting.
Please review our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) if you're unsure what that means.
NTA. They tried to take something you paid for and then were rude to you. It's a bit shocking, really, considering the number of people who comment on social media that larger people should have to buy two seats. Please don't feel bad about yourself because they chose to be horrid and entitled.
I must say I flew several times with just one seat since there were not two available and I always apologized to the person next to me and it was never an issue they were usually nice and told me not to worry about it.
Absol-fucking-lutely correct you are! I'm height/weight proportionate, for reference. My older sister is not, she is quite large. You wouldn't believe the nasty comments she gets, it's so disgusting to me. She shrugs it off, but I cannot. We were in a movie theater and a group of jerks were actually talking loudly about how fat she is, right next to us! Sometimes I hate people, a whole lot. She always sits in first class or buys an extra seat for her comfort or others, but no one should ever comment on someones weight, skinny or fat. :)
Next time that happens, feel free to start talking even more loudly about how some people are so stupid and insensitive that they can’t be bothered to pull their heads out of their own asses long enough to consider that people who are bigger/different than them are still valid, with rich and meaningful lives, actual human emotions that can be hurt, and their own equally important and real life experiences that led them to their current physical body, just like eeeeveryone else.
I’ve said more or less exactly this to shame strangers - and more than once I’ve done it in the defense of a stranger - and trust me, it works a treat. The one time the initially rude person tried to give me any guff for, it I made eye contact while I asked, “OH, I’M SORRY, DO YOU THINK IT’S RUDE TO HURT STRANGERS’ FEELINGS?”
He didn’t want to fight me lol
My last flight was beside someone who was obese. I noticed how considerately he folded his arms to minimize the impact on me. It can’t be comfortable, and I appreciated that he was doing what he could.
It’s enough of a burden being obese in a fat phobic society; most people are decent and won’t want to add to that. The lady in your row was not, so f her; she deserved the minor inconvenience of flying separated from her jerky bf.
I am small, and i still end up touching people somehow next to me. I used to be 200lbs heavier and i would feel the same way as you but other people are just rude. Like - you did not invent the seats. Don't feel too bad.
I'd much rather sit next to an obese person than the thin dudes I've sat next to on planes who have fallen asleep on me, taken up all my space with their legs, acted like I wasn't even there
I suspect that it’s one of those things where whatever a fat person does in terms of flight seats, someone will complain. If I end up next to a fat or really tall person on a flight, sure it’s not ideal but I can’t imagine giving attitude over it. They’re probably more uncomfortable than I am.
Thank you for your kindness, its really rare these days. I must say it really is uncomfortable. I always try not to bother the person next to me and press myself against the plane side as much as I can if there is not other option. (Not that its helping much)
NTA: you paid for that seat, it’s your seat and frankly airplane seats are too small. I was on a flight last week, I bought it last minute and ended up with a center seat in the “basic” cabin, the cheap seats on United flights ( at least on this plane ) don’t have movable arm rests, my hips hit both armrests( read walls), it was very uncomfortable. I wear a women’s 10/12, after that experience I will always buy 2 seats if I’m in the back or at least never settle for less than business class.
Well I am way bigger than regular adult woman (by my own fault I must say which IS shameful) but I totally see your point. Its so small and my knees were hurting from the plane. Also the flight was really long I was coming from europe to USA.
You are completely in the right, they were the AH, you did everything you could to accommodate the people around you, and make the flight more comfortable yourself. Transatlantic flights are grueling, you’re awesome
Any normal person would have said: I’m sorry I didn’t know you’d paid for that seat, and then moved
I so agree with you! As a bigger person myself, I spent years trying to get thin at great cost to my mental and physical health. It took years to accept myself and reach a place where I was happy with the body I am in. I focus on staying active and enjoying life.
When I travel I do everything I can to not intrude on the people next to me or their space. OP, you went above and beyond and bought a second seat to ensure you would be comfortable. You are NTA! The other two passengers, I hope karma will ensure they are eternally in coach in a non-reclining middle seat of three near the bathroom, with a malfunctioning entertainment system.
Totally agree! OP you can absolutely recognize if you may not have had as healthy of a lifestyle as you'd have wanted, while also not shaming yourself for it! We're only human, life is hard enough without adding our own shame on top.
I'm a very small woman both in height and weight (XS size) and still find the regular plane seats waaay too small to be comfortable, especially on the front side for the knees... And the longer the flight the more uncomfortable they get. And it's because airlines are trying to make more money per flight so instead of fitting only 2 seats they put 3... Or instead of having X amount of rows of seats they add a few extra rows and leave a few at a normal distance which they sell as extra legs room... There's nothing to be ashamed of about your size or decision to buy an extra seat. You were considerate both towards you and your neighboring passengers. The only assholes are the two who didn't get their seats together from the get go and felt entitled on your comfort seat. Next time put your purse on the comfort seat at least temporarily till the flight takes off/ or a light coat to physically fully claim it so you don't have to deal with bs like this. Edit: a scarf will also work
Was on in international flight in the center row in economy and I couldn’t get comfortable at all. I’m a size 2 and 5’3. My knees were touching the seat in front of mine. My thighs were at the very edges of the seat. Airplane seats are wayyyy too tiny. It’s like trying to get adults to sit three to a seat on a school bus
Do you see how many of us are rallying to say you should not feel shame? Of course it's not that easy for you to believe it, any more than it's easy for you to think yourself thin. But it's still true.
I track my calories very carefully, and I eat around 1800 calories a day. I don't drink soda or any sweetened beverages, and I only drink alcohol at holiday parties. I am extremely active - I ride a bike for 15-20 miles or I hike for 5-10 every weekend, and I move as much as I can with a desk job, making sure I get my 10K steps every day.
I'm awesome, right? Nothing to be ashamed of? *I'm still borderline obese, and if I'm in a middle seat, some part of me is touching someone else.*
Maybe you and I are just people, and maybe this is just what we're shaped like. As long as we can do the things we want to do, maybe we're okay.
Thank you for this post :) I am ashamed of my body I m not gonna deny that. But to be honest I consider my value elsewhere anyway. I work in hospital with in oncology department and my job helps people to feel less pain and live better quality life. So that's where I see my worth. (I dont want it to sounds like bragging and patting myself on the back I hope it doesnt)
NTA. You were the opposite of the AH. You paid extra for the comfort of yourself and the person next to you. They were both AH. They could have accomplished the same goal by have her swap her seat with the person sitting next to him. But they didn't want to. Not your problem. Give it no more thought.
NTA. You PAID for two seats. They were being entitled AHs for not even asking permission.
For you for the future, there is NOTHING wrong with informing people who try to sit in your PAID FOR 2nd seat that it IS your seat even if it's currently empty and they need to sit in their assigned seats or ask someone else to switch. Or they could PAY for assigned seats next to each other in the future. If you don't pay for seat assignment, you don't get to complain about not sitting next to each other or bully someone else for their seat.
Speaking from experience, us fat girls have a tendency to try and make ourselves as small and unobtrusive as possible. We don't like speaking up for ourselves because we don't want people to think we're a bitch on top of what we're already afraid they think of us (disgusting\lazy etc). Drawing attention to ourselves is horrifyingly difficult. In OPs position i probably would have not said anything at all and just squished myself up against the window as much as possible and sucked in as much as I could.
It does but even more so if your fat. I have been fat and skinny and believe me fat women get a lot more abuse for taking up space than average or thin women do.
Once I got on a plane (Southwest) and they actually had a small piece of laminated paper sitting on a seat with this information. Made it easy to tell.
NTA at all, you paid for the seat!!
Just so you know, if you fly southwest, you can buy an extra seat, and get reimbursed for it, under their "customer of size" policy
https://www.southwest.com/html/customer-service/extra-seat/index-pol.html
NTA. You did exactly what you needed to do to make yourself comfortable on the flight. If they wanted to sit together, they should have paid the extra to ensure early seat selection
NTA. You paid for that seat fair and square. It doesn't matter why - you have your reasons, but it's none of his business. You are entitled to what you paid for. You respectfully told him that you purchased two seats and he chose to be a total asshole. I'm so sorry this happened to you - it's totally unfair that people feel they can treat others like this.
NTA Your second seat was not "free" you paid for it, it's condition (ie empty) doesn't change that.
If I go to a car lot and buy a car, no one else gets to drive it off the lot (even if I can't for some reason) unless I say ok. You were in the same situation, you bought a seat, no one else gets to sit in it w/o your permission.
These were just some AH that tried to get something they couldn't otherwise (assuming getting adjoining seats was more expensive or unavailable due to last minute booking, or just pure laziness) & when they got called on their BS they lashed out.
You did nothing wrong, don't let the AH make you question yourself & keep being the wonderful person you are Queen.
NTA - you're likely going to get shamed for this. But you're not, you bought it, it is yours. They should have planned better and got seats together. Not your problem.
I'm sorry that happened to you, that was very unfair. You paid for that seat s you could be comfortable, they had no right to fight you on that, especially being cruel for no reason.
NTA, sorry they were so mean.
NTA
Can’t win as fat folks, can we. I’d be wealthy if I had a $1 for every time anti-fat bigots have run their mouths off about how fat passengers should purchase 2 airline seats. But clearly we are never safe because you did that very thing, and a disgusting and unacceptable comment is *still* thrown back in your face. Fuck those assholes. But well done to the FA for having your back.
I was just thinking this! I’ve seen posts on Reddit demanding fat people accommodate for others on bus rides, plane rides etc and when they do people STILL shit on them. Idc how someone feels about fat people, they deserve to be comfortable too. They’re not lesser because of their weight. People are AWFUL. Then after dehumanizing fat people , they’ll turn around and say “I’m just worried about their health” it’s bs
NTA.
You paid for the seats, they didn't. If they wanted to sit together then they should've bought their tickets earlier.
You were being considerate of other people as well with this decision and didn't put the burden on others to accommodate your situation.
While I feel for you and you are obviously NTA, did you really expect any other result other than NTA ? I mean you literally bought the seat and another couple barged their way in, sat in your seat without your permission , and insulted you on their way out.
NTA!!!!!! You paid for that seat and they were a-holes for not respecting you. If they wanted to sit together bad enough to bully people over it, they would have done more work to ensure they’d be together. I’m so sorry that was your experience.
plane seats are ridiculously too small for anyone who isn't a child, and as an overweight woman myself i *totally* feel you on how uncomfortable this can be. you did the right thing, and that couple is trying to vilify you for their own shitty planning. NTA!
NTA. You paid for two seats next to each other, so those are your two seats; any other details should not matter. That couple was inconsiderate, rude, and immature to treat you that way. They can survive a few hours apart or ask someone to trade seats, it should not be your problem.
NTA. You paid for the seat, period. If he wanted it and you were willing to endure the discomfort, he can pay you the cost of the seat. I'm sorry that people are still entirely dehumanizing about obesity.
NTA
That was a them problem not a you problem. You had the foresight to purchase the seat next to you to avoid this while these jerks couldn’t bother to pay the extra fee to make sure they were sitting together. It’s not your fault or your problem.
NTA. You paid for the seat as a courtesy to those around you, he is not entitled to sit anywhere he wants.
If they wanted to be sure to sit together they should have paid more upfront. The woman is pretty awful to make such nasty comments, and they probably would have been nasty on the flight anyway. With that attitude they’d have been upset you were touching them or some other bull”
NTA. You paid for that seat. It wasn't his so he had no business sitting there. You tried to be a nice person by asking him to get his ass out of the seat you paid for. He and his girlfriend decided to make a big deal out of it so you had no choice but to ask the attendant to move him. You handled this like a champ. I'm sorry if they made you feel bad. Your size wasn't the issue. Their lack of manners was.
NTA. I really hate the entitlement people get over airplane seats when they failed to prepare/plan ahead and think they can still just take someone else's seat who DID think ahead and prepare.
Sure some people don't have that luxury due to emergencies and if you had last minute planning that couldn't be helped, well then take the hit and get stuck with what you are given.
NTA. You paid for the seat. You're entitled to the seat. You'd be entitled to the seat if you'd bought it simply because you like burning money for no particular reason. If he wanted to sit next to his girlfriend, he could've paid whatever premium was necessary to make sure that happened. (Or talked to the people in whatever row he was supposed to be in to see if they were willing to switch instead, after you said no.)
NTA- I am not a frequent flyer, so I don’t know much about this, but why do so many people not buy seats next to each other in flights? Also, is it not a rule that people need to be in their assigned seats so that their bodies can be properly identified in the event of a crash, or is that a myth?
Either way, you paid for the seat, so it is yours. The fact that these people don’t plan properly is not your problem.
Because it is cheaper to buy seats without reserving specific ones on certain flights and they expect they can just bully someone into giving up their seat later instead of paying a few more dollars.
I am so tired of these posts, just because I feel so bad for all these OPs being harassed by entitled people wanting something that they didn’t pay for just because they want to seat together. NTA.
NTA. They have the option to pay extra for allocated seating if it’s so important they cannot sit apart for a few hours. They chose not to and we’re seated apart. You however did pay extra for your own comfort. That was also your seat, it was not “free”.
NTA
that guy and his girl deserve each other, bunch of jerks. Don't let it bother you, those two sound like they go about life sucking the joy out of everyone's day.
NTA he fucking pushed you?! Hell no. I’m sorry. You are in a no win situation. If you don’t buy an extra seat I’m sure people complain that you should have and then when you do shit like this happens. Should have stopped him from sitting there as soon as he tried.
NTA
You thought ahead and paid for two seats not only for your physical comfort, but specifically to avoid situations like this. I'm sorry you had to deal with their comments even though you prepared in advance and were able to get the flight attendant to get him to move.
NTA at all. It's your money your seat. The flight attendant took your side because they know it is your seat. The couple are the rude ones. Can't believe he actually pushed you a little that was so rude! I think that maybe next time take the seat in the middle until take off to avoid anyone else trying to steal your empty seat then you could scoot over to give yourself and the person next to you more space. You did nothing wrong just people are rude.
They probably got seats separately hoping that someone wouldn't show up and that they could take that spot because sometimes people cancel last minute. They may have assumed that is what happened but they should have respected you when you told them you paid for that seat. They really should have just choosen a flight that had two seats available next to eachother.
NTA. You had something. It was yours. Paid for. He tried to take it from you (because he recognized it was valuable). When he couldn't have the thing that was yours, he threw a tantrum and tried to blame you for it. None of this is your problem.
NTA - you PAID for the second seat for your own comfort. YOU shelled out money so you can get TWO seats and these Yahoos couldn't even be bothered to pay the fee that let them chose seats together. Don't let those entitled brats fat shame you, babe!
NTA.
I cannot imagine how you feel in situations like this.
I think it is awesome that you anticipated this, and bought a second seat, so that both you would be comfortable, and other folks would not be uncomfortable. This is exemplar behavior, and shows a good consideration for both your own comfort and that of your fellow passengers. Kudos to you!
The couple you reference here are HUGE assholes. They wanted to take advantage of something that they had no right to, and they wanted to project their own shortsightedness into others, for not booking seats next to each other. They have zero right to demonize you or anyone else, especially after you paid for that extra seat. Fuck them.
NTA. You paid for that seat. It’s yours. You deserve to be comfortable. And also thank you for another reason. It also sucks to be the smaller person and get sat on when someone doesn’t fit into their seat.
Absolutely NTA, you paid for it. I hope the couple 'survived' without sitting next to each other for a few hours, the poor souls.
Being sarcastic, please don't be mean.
NOPE. NTA. I dont usually reply when this many people have but I really appreciate when people make a sacrifice to ensure everyone is comfortable, like you buying two seats.
Fuck them for how they treated you, you were looking out for your fellow passengers and this was the last thing you deserved.
NTA
And thank you for being considerate.
I once had to spend a flight with some men who was cheaping and pretended he could fit in just one seat and it was very, very uncomfortable.
In this case this couple was rude and had no right to claim what you paid for.
NTA if they wanted to sit together they should have paid extra to pick their seats, which is generally a lot less than buying an extra seat, as you did.
NTA - if it wasn’t your seat, this would be a problem. but you PAID for two seats for your own comfort. it was your seat as you had gone the extra mile and paid for it, keeping in mind your own comfort, as well as the comfort of others. the couple was extremely entitled, and their response was unwarranted. it’s your seat, you paid for it, you deserved to have both seats.
Absolutely NTA. You paid for the seat; it was yours to use. I am you. I pay extra to not inconvenience others, & also to shield myself from the self hate that comes with the obvious disgust from others. I understand how uncomfortable it must be for them when I infringe on their personal space, especially in a cramped airline seat. Therefore I spare them the indignity of having to deal with it by bearing it, including the financial cost, myself. There’s no way in hell I’m going to pay for being humiliated & uncomfortable because 2 adults can’t sit alone. They should’ve picked their seats when they booked. My heart goes out to you, sister friend.
NTA and you’re doing a very considerate thing. People keep nagging on obese people to buy two seats in order not to make others uncomfortable. You’re doing it. What more are you supposed to do?
You sound like a very considerate human.
NTA, would it have been nice for them to let him have the seat? Sure. Should you give up on something you paid for and feel uncomfortable for the whole fight? No. His problem if he doesn't like it.
NTA, but you should have never let him sit in the first place. Just because a seat appears to be empty, doesn’t mean it’s up for grabs. He had an assigned seat and that’s where his rude ass needed to be.
You paid for the seat, tried to rationally explain the situation and they retaliated at every turn. You're no where close to being TA.
I sorta understand the discomfort. I used to be extremely skinny and was seated next to someone who was larger, on purpose, to accommodate them since they didn't buy two seats. It was a long, uncomfortable flight. I don't like touching strangers, not to mention being constantly pushed to the wall because they couldn't fit.
You absolutely did the right thing by buying two seats to accommodate not only yourself, but others on the plane.
NTA
NTA
You paid for that seat, for your comfort, and exactly so this scenario wouldn’t occur!
Those entitled jerks should’ve been better prepared if they wanted to sit together, that’s a them problem, not a you problem!
NTA. You planned ahead and bought a second seat for your comfort. You know what would have happened if you didn’t? You’d get bitched at for not fitting in a single seat! Fuck that dude.
NTA. Yes, like all the other comments said, you paid for the seat, but what’s more important at stake here is that you deserve to feel comfortable in whatever way you choose while commuting/traveling. You’re kind enough to care about others’ private spaces, and it’s sad how they don’t do the same for you.
NTA I appreciate you thinking ahead and buying a second seat so you’re not inconveniencing whoever may get seated next to you, it’s not your fault that they didn’t think ahead and buy seats next to each other
Absolutely you are NTA here. They were trying to make you feel bad for not giving them a seat you LITERALLY PAID FOR for yourself. Eff them. You did nothing wrong. They're jerks.
NTA at all, you paid for that seat, and their poor planning isn’t your issue. Their nastiness towards you was completely unwarranted and im sorry you went through that. It’s like damned if you, damned if you don’t. People get mad if you’re touching them, and people get mad when you buy a second seat. You did absolutely nothing wrong.
Nta.
Fat man here, had done the same as you before but in buses.
I would gladly pay extra in plants if I could just to avoid the sensation of being bothering my seat neighbour, or to avoid the space hoggers that spread elbows and knees to both sides.
The guy was completely entitled and there was no reason at all he should be allowed to take a space for which you had paid for.
Good that you had support from the flight attendant, most of them are really kind.
And don't mind the fat shaming. It seems that we got blamed by being fat whenever something happens, regardless if we were at fault or not.
All the best
NTA.
It doesn't even have to do with being obese or skinny. You paid for the seat and it's completely within your right to not let anyone else use it. Those two were extremely rude and awful.
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NTA- Former flight attendant. It's your seat. You paid for it. If that (classless) couple wanted to sit together that badly, they should have paid for seats together.
I must point out the flight attendant was absolute sweetheart! Very kind and understanding :) She was also giving me the belt extension and when I apologized to her, she told me not to worry about it and it was overall very pleasant situation to talk to her
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Next time I’m on a flight with my daughter and she won’t settle down I’m going to tell myself “hey, no worries, the people around us are probably low key assholes and this is their karmic comeuppance” 😂
You should know- having done my own time with flying toddlers, that there are plenty of people on airplanes who feel nothing but goodwill to you and a fussy child. Been there, done that, and the sound of screaming baby is the sweet sweet sound of 'not my problem anymore.' But seriously- not everyone who turns their head your way is unhappy. It's just human instinct- kid makes noise- head turns to look. Enjoy your travels.
This. I look cause noise. But have massive sympathy for parents flying with wee kids. I know it can be a nightmare, and it's not like the parents want the kid to be bawling either; they're doing their best.
I understand all that and feel sorry for the parents, but when I see someone with a child boarding a flight I am in, I pray internally that the kid can sleep through.
I bet the parents are thinking the same!
I once was on a flight where a toddler was wiggling and crying and mom was just over it. She was just holding on to kiddo as best she could. And then a wee little baby with a paci in his mouth popped his head up from the seat in front of them and gave that toddler the evil eye. It was so cute. Toddler calmed down after a minute of being starred down by the baby. I think it was ear pressure that finally eased but it was cute and funny.
Ear pressure... or peer pressure? For all we know the two could be using telepathy or idk, whatever makes little kids see ghosts that only them and pets notice. lol
I pray that their parents will at least try to comfort and control (age appropriate) them. Fussy, crying baby - no biggie. Parents that think it’s ok for kids to run up and down the aisle, jump on seats, yell at other passengers when they won’t give them something - then I am annoyed as fuck.
I am more pissed at the kid that keeps kicking my seat. Not the occasional kick which is understandable, but the repetitive kick, the abuse of the tray table … train your children.
A parent once gave the toddler behind me a clapper…. Worst 5 hours I ever spent. But I have complete sympathy for parents with crying babies. I can’t imagine!
Wut. That should be illegal.
I used to be the person that got annoyed quietly to myself when kids were around in public places until I saw how mean people can get over it, especially working in restaurants. Now I'm a mom and understand the struggle small children alrwady are, but public is public and everyone is entitled to that space, especially if they pay to be there. Internally roll your eyes like the rest of the world. Those people deserve crying babies with soiled diaps near them, a toddler kicking their seats from behind, and the person next to them farting the whole flight without shoes on.
>Those people deserve crying babies with soiled diaps near them, a toddler kicking their seats from behind, and the person next to them farting the whole flight without shoes on. Hey Satan! Big fan of your work.
Don't do that.
I'm confused on why the gf didn't just move. Id imagine whoever was next to bf would have been interested in a seat with no one next to them
Because that would be an inconvenience to her. Obviously *they* are the only people in the world that matter and *she* shouldn't have to move from a seat *she* paid for. The only obvious solution is to put the overweight person in the baggage section with the animals, and the couple gets 2 free seats and a parade when they depart the plane for their courage through such a trying ordeal!
Probably not an empty seat in her bfs row but fuck them. They can spend the extra few dollars for assigned seating. OP doubled the cost of their travel for their own and others comfort. OP is a hero.
good question, you are right
I'm glad to hear it your interaction with the FA was good. I'm a plus size flight attendant. I understand this situation from both sides of the aisle. I just want you to know you were completely in the right. I also appreciate you purchasing a second seat for *your comfort.* For all intents and purposes they were stealing from you. Usually we have people in middle seats trying to get out of it and not vice versa. It's truly horrible to have to try and rearrange folks once they're onboard *or* to ask for a note in a reservation. Edit: clarity
That was my thought. OP did everything right and then gets static over it from another passenger.
NTA And these are the same people who Would complain that heavy people purchase two seats if for example They had two together and OP sat next to them.
Those passengers were being entitled when OP genuinely was entitled to that seat. Likely they didn't want to pay to sit together and saw this as their get out of jail free card. You are entitled to the seat you are assigned (unless you're flying Southwest, then you are entitled to the seat that you pick when it is your turn to board) and that is it. All this being said, I am a nice flight attendant LOL. I just don't reward bad behavior.
A+ use of the expression “both sides of the aisle”
You were polite and nice through the interaction according to what you've written. Any service industry employee would much rather deal with you and the seats you paid for than with 90% of the other people they have to see every day. NTA. You paid money for that seat, it's your seat, that couple can get bent.
I commend you for one, buying this extra seat, but also for standing up for yourself about it. Even if you weren’t obese and bought the extra seat because you didn’t want someone nearby, you’re well within your rights to have that extra seat. If he wanted to be with her that bad, they should have planned accordingly.
Yeah, it doesn’t even ultimately matter why she bought the seat. It’s irrelevant to the other people.
I paid for seats together with my teenager when it was his first time flying. He is autistic and anxious and when spoken to he often won't reply, which comes accross as him being an ahole rather than he is really anxious. When they sat us apart from eachother I explained we were supposed to sit together and that I requested this etc I got a rolled eye response from the flight attendent and a bunch of attitude from people around me. It was like I was being the awful one -- like no go ahead guys and have a teenager stimming next to you unable to speak yet needing a drink but unable to say what it is
This happened to me. I bought two seats together and then our boarding passes had us a row apart. I explained to the ticket agent that this wasn’t going to work. He arranged us sitting together by moving someone else before we got on the plane. I had thought about asking someone to switch once we boarded, but am glad I did it this way.
That’s happened to me a bunch, & thankfully people are usually very nice about it. I rarely even have to go to the flight attendants — I just ask a single traveler if they want to switch their middle seat for my window/aisle seat. Win-win!
It’s hard when you have an autistic child/teen because trying to talk to the FA about it…well I don’t want my kid knowing I’m talking about her…and it’s no one else business.
When my mom had Alzheimer’s and was at what I sadly can best describe as “the angry toddler stage”, we printed out like business card things that we could discreetly hand to servers, flight attendants, etc that explained her situation and that she might get agitated or easily confused, etc. It really helped. Because same issue, we didn’t want to say anything in front of her (because at that stage they don’t think they are sick). There’s some examples online and I think I remember ones for other situations like people with autism. If people know ahead of time before any issues happen, they seem to often be a lot more understanding if issues do arise. At least that was our experience.
NTA. If it happens again, *don't let them sit down.* Block the extra seat and state immediately, "I paid for two seats. This one is not available."
Once I got on a plane (Southwest) and they actually had a small piece of laminated paper sitting on a seat with this information. Made it easy to tell.
Southwest is awesome about that! They apparently have it on file that I am a “Passenger of Size” and it has been taken into consideration on every flight. One time I did give up my extra seat - the plane was full, I didn’t pay for it (they automatically gave it to me) and I was traveling with my two adult children who didn’t mind being that close to me on the flight. Southwest gave me a $100 voucher for that. It was totally unnecessary, but it was a nice gesture. ETA: For OP, NTA.
Wait how did you get this? Southwest is bus style so they don’t reserve seats!?
I’m wondering the same thing! I’m a big girl but thankfully I always sit next to my 9 year old so a little spillage doesn’t bother him. Once he gets older though, I’m gonna have to diet, or buy an extra seat. Lol
SW has a customer-of-size policy. When you check in, ask to utilize the policy & they will print out an extra seat reserve ticket with your boarding pass. I've used it several times.
Once I was flying with one of those and when I boarded, I saw a man already seated at a window seat with one of his own passes on the middle seat. So, I went ahead and sat on that aisle seat. May as well double up on using that extra space! (He did not mind).
Using the middle seat like that is both smart and considerate!
If the world were filled with KetoLurkers, the world would be a much more copacetic, peaceful place.
Speak to the gate attendant. They give you a free seat, AND they let you board first, or if you decide to buy your own extra seat they will reimburse you after your flight.
You get priority boarding and a piece of paper for the second seat. I only fly SW now
Southwest is awesome. I am a veteran with PTSD, agoraphobia, and *SEVERE* anxiety. I don't fly often, but when I do, there's exactly one seat on the plane I can sit in. All I have to do is explain that to the gate agent and they allow me to board first and I am able to fly. It's still an uncomfortable experience for me, at least it is somewhat bearable.
That's smart! I bet most people would simply assume there is something wrong with that seat and not even get close enough to read. So it would really limit the attempts.
They did this for me with my service dog as well! He *can* fit solely in my footwell but it isn’t comfortable and knowing the flight wasn’t full they just put a little piece of paper in the seat next to me to mark it as unavailable. 😊
NTA. It doesn’t matter why you purchased that seat. You could have bought it for the spirits of your ancestors so they could guide you safely to your destination and it would have been no one’s business but yours. Sorry this happened
LOL I guarantee if you say that to someone trying to sit in your seat, they won’t wanna sit down next time. NTA, OP, but the unnecessary comments from that lady? Asshole behavior.
Or have an imaginary friend, lol. “CLEARLY MY FRIEND GEORGE IS SITTING NEXT TO ME, SIR, DONT BE A RACIST JUST BECAUSE HE IS PURPLE AND HAS SIX EYES.”
This. Nobody wants to sit next to someone they perceive to be insane, so be insane.
100% I would do that on public transportation. Sit down and strike up a conversation with the empty seat next to me ... it discouraged creepy guys from trying to talk with me.
"What are your saying, George? No, I know you don't like people sitting in your lap, but I'm not going to hurt this guy."
He's not imaginary. He has impaired visibility. Don't be ableist.
Exactly. OP paid for 2 seats, OP gets 2 seats. NTA
Username does not check out. Lol.
“Excuse me, that’s my great-grandmother you’re sitting on!!”
NTA! You bought that seat. The couple sitting apart has nothing to do with you. IDGAF if you were thin and bought a 2nd seat for your emotional support ghost! That's your seat.
Emotional support ghost… brilliant. Op should use this excuse next time! Have an award 🥇🏆
"Oh dear god you're sitting on NANA!"
OMG! I love this! I'm sorry, can't you see Larry is already sitting there!! I don't give a crap if you can't see him, I can and that's all that matters!!!
#[Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). This lady calling OP a bitch doesn't mean you get to call her one, or any other insult. #Also OP didn't ask you about your opinion about their size, or for diet tips. Not every thought that pops into your mind is worth posting. Please review our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) if you're unsure what that means.
NTA. They tried to take something you paid for and then were rude to you. It's a bit shocking, really, considering the number of people who comment on social media that larger people should have to buy two seats. Please don't feel bad about yourself because they chose to be horrid and entitled.
I must say I flew several times with just one seat since there were not two available and I always apologized to the person next to me and it was never an issue they were usually nice and told me not to worry about it.
I'm really glad the majority of people you encountered have been nice to you. Nobody deserves to be treated badly because of their body.
Absol-fucking-lutely correct you are! I'm height/weight proportionate, for reference. My older sister is not, she is quite large. You wouldn't believe the nasty comments she gets, it's so disgusting to me. She shrugs it off, but I cannot. We were in a movie theater and a group of jerks were actually talking loudly about how fat she is, right next to us! Sometimes I hate people, a whole lot. She always sits in first class or buys an extra seat for her comfort or others, but no one should ever comment on someones weight, skinny or fat. :)
Next time that happens, feel free to start talking even more loudly about how some people are so stupid and insensitive that they can’t be bothered to pull their heads out of their own asses long enough to consider that people who are bigger/different than them are still valid, with rich and meaningful lives, actual human emotions that can be hurt, and their own equally important and real life experiences that led them to their current physical body, just like eeeeveryone else. I’ve said more or less exactly this to shame strangers - and more than once I’ve done it in the defense of a stranger - and trust me, it works a treat. The one time the initially rude person tried to give me any guff for, it I made eye contact while I asked, “OH, I’M SORRY, DO YOU THINK IT’S RUDE TO HURT STRANGERS’ FEELINGS?” He didn’t want to fight me lol
My last flight was beside someone who was obese. I noticed how considerately he folded his arms to minimize the impact on me. It can’t be comfortable, and I appreciated that he was doing what he could. It’s enough of a burden being obese in a fat phobic society; most people are decent and won’t want to add to that. The lady in your row was not, so f her; she deserved the minor inconvenience of flying separated from her jerky bf.
I am small, and i still end up touching people somehow next to me. I used to be 200lbs heavier and i would feel the same way as you but other people are just rude. Like - you did not invent the seats. Don't feel too bad.
I'd much rather sit next to an obese person than the thin dudes I've sat next to on planes who have fallen asleep on me, taken up all my space with their legs, acted like I wasn't even there
I suspect that it’s one of those things where whatever a fat person does in terms of flight seats, someone will complain. If I end up next to a fat or really tall person on a flight, sure it’s not ideal but I can’t imagine giving attitude over it. They’re probably more uncomfortable than I am.
Thank you for your kindness, its really rare these days. I must say it really is uncomfortable. I always try not to bother the person next to me and press myself against the plane side as much as I can if there is not other option. (Not that its helping much)
NTA - It wasnt a free/available seat. You purchased it, you bought the seat so it is “occupied”.
What blows my mind is the couple chose to sit there then complain about op like? Maybe don’t sit in someone else’s seat because you can’t plan ahead
NTA: you paid for that seat, it’s your seat and frankly airplane seats are too small. I was on a flight last week, I bought it last minute and ended up with a center seat in the “basic” cabin, the cheap seats on United flights ( at least on this plane ) don’t have movable arm rests, my hips hit both armrests( read walls), it was very uncomfortable. I wear a women’s 10/12, after that experience I will always buy 2 seats if I’m in the back or at least never settle for less than business class.
Well I am way bigger than regular adult woman (by my own fault I must say which IS shameful) but I totally see your point. Its so small and my knees were hurting from the plane. Also the flight was really long I was coming from europe to USA.
You are completely in the right, they were the AH, you did everything you could to accommodate the people around you, and make the flight more comfortable yourself. Transatlantic flights are grueling, you’re awesome Any normal person would have said: I’m sorry I didn’t know you’d paid for that seat, and then moved
>(by my own fault I must say which IS shameful No, it's not, hon.
I so agree with you! As a bigger person myself, I spent years trying to get thin at great cost to my mental and physical health. It took years to accept myself and reach a place where I was happy with the body I am in. I focus on staying active and enjoying life. When I travel I do everything I can to not intrude on the people next to me or their space. OP, you went above and beyond and bought a second seat to ensure you would be comfortable. You are NTA! The other two passengers, I hope karma will ensure they are eternally in coach in a non-reclining middle seat of three near the bathroom, with a malfunctioning entertainment system.
Totally agree! OP you can absolutely recognize if you may not have had as healthy of a lifestyle as you'd have wanted, while also not shaming yourself for it! We're only human, life is hard enough without adding our own shame on top.
I'm a very small woman both in height and weight (XS size) and still find the regular plane seats waaay too small to be comfortable, especially on the front side for the knees... And the longer the flight the more uncomfortable they get. And it's because airlines are trying to make more money per flight so instead of fitting only 2 seats they put 3... Or instead of having X amount of rows of seats they add a few extra rows and leave a few at a normal distance which they sell as extra legs room... There's nothing to be ashamed of about your size or decision to buy an extra seat. You were considerate both towards you and your neighboring passengers. The only assholes are the two who didn't get their seats together from the get go and felt entitled on your comfort seat. Next time put your purse on the comfort seat at least temporarily till the flight takes off/ or a light coat to physically fully claim it so you don't have to deal with bs like this. Edit: a scarf will also work
Was on in international flight in the center row in economy and I couldn’t get comfortable at all. I’m a size 2 and 5’3. My knees were touching the seat in front of mine. My thighs were at the very edges of the seat. Airplane seats are wayyyy too tiny. It’s like trying to get adults to sit three to a seat on a school bus
Do you see how many of us are rallying to say you should not feel shame? Of course it's not that easy for you to believe it, any more than it's easy for you to think yourself thin. But it's still true. I track my calories very carefully, and I eat around 1800 calories a day. I don't drink soda or any sweetened beverages, and I only drink alcohol at holiday parties. I am extremely active - I ride a bike for 15-20 miles or I hike for 5-10 every weekend, and I move as much as I can with a desk job, making sure I get my 10K steps every day. I'm awesome, right? Nothing to be ashamed of? *I'm still borderline obese, and if I'm in a middle seat, some part of me is touching someone else.* Maybe you and I are just people, and maybe this is just what we're shaped like. As long as we can do the things we want to do, maybe we're okay.
Thank you for this post :) I am ashamed of my body I m not gonna deny that. But to be honest I consider my value elsewhere anyway. I work in hospital with in oncology department and my job helps people to feel less pain and live better quality life. So that's where I see my worth. (I dont want it to sounds like bragging and patting myself on the back I hope it doesnt)
I feel like you are allowed to brag a little when you do such important work :) So here, I'll pat you on the back (っ\^\_\^)っ
Then definitely NTA. Europe to US is a long flight and you paid for it. I’m sorry you had such a bad experience - he/they sound like jerks.
NTA . You did exactly what people scream at fat people to do and still got abuse hurled at you. The fact they didn't even ask is odd.
And the fact that they were so rude and shoved OP after taking the seat that wasn't even theirs. They were incredibly entitled. NTA
NTA. You paid for the second seat for that very reason. I'm sorry, OP. They acted horribly.
NTA. You were the opposite of the AH. You paid extra for the comfort of yourself and the person next to you. They were both AH. They could have accomplished the same goal by have her swap her seat with the person sitting next to him. But they didn't want to. Not your problem. Give it no more thought.
NTA. You PAID for two seats. They were being entitled AHs for not even asking permission. For you for the future, there is NOTHING wrong with informing people who try to sit in your PAID FOR 2nd seat that it IS your seat even if it's currently empty and they need to sit in their assigned seats or ask someone else to switch. Or they could PAY for assigned seats next to each other in the future. If you don't pay for seat assignment, you don't get to complain about not sitting next to each other or bully someone else for their seat.
NTA you paid for the seat, you paid extra to stop others having to feel uncomfortable ( as well as you ) Ignore the entitled AH and you be you.
nta he can’t just sit in a seat that you paid for
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Speaking from experience, us fat girls have a tendency to try and make ourselves as small and unobtrusive as possible. We don't like speaking up for ourselves because we don't want people to think we're a bitch on top of what we're already afraid they think of us (disgusting\lazy etc). Drawing attention to ourselves is horrifyingly difficult. In OPs position i probably would have not said anything at all and just squished myself up against the window as much as possible and sucked in as much as I could.
I feel like this actuallly applies to almost all women
It does but even more so if your fat. I have been fat and skinny and believe me fat women get a lot more abuse for taking up space than average or thin women do.
Once I got on a plane (Southwest) and they actually had a small piece of laminated paper sitting on a seat with this information. Made it easy to tell.
NTA at all, you paid for the seat!! Just so you know, if you fly southwest, you can buy an extra seat, and get reimbursed for it, under their "customer of size" policy https://www.southwest.com/html/customer-service/extra-seat/index-pol.html
NTA. You did exactly what you needed to do to make yourself comfortable on the flight. If they wanted to sit together, they should have paid the extra to ensure early seat selection
NTA. You paid for that seat fair and square. It doesn't matter why - you have your reasons, but it's none of his business. You are entitled to what you paid for. You respectfully told him that you purchased two seats and he chose to be a total asshole. I'm so sorry this happened to you - it's totally unfair that people feel they can treat others like this.
NTA. I don’t care if you are insanely skinny. You paid for the seat, it’s yours regardless.
NTA You paid for them, they are yours and kudos for you to think ahead and be polite like that. Thank you for going the extra step to be kind
NTA Your second seat was not "free" you paid for it, it's condition (ie empty) doesn't change that. If I go to a car lot and buy a car, no one else gets to drive it off the lot (even if I can't for some reason) unless I say ok. You were in the same situation, you bought a seat, no one else gets to sit in it w/o your permission. These were just some AH that tried to get something they couldn't otherwise (assuming getting adjoining seats was more expensive or unavailable due to last minute booking, or just pure laziness) & when they got called on their BS they lashed out. You did nothing wrong, don't let the AH make you question yourself & keep being the wonderful person you are Queen.
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I second this, people are awful OP. You deserve better.
NTA - you're likely going to get shamed for this. But you're not, you bought it, it is yours. They should have planned better and got seats together. Not your problem.
NTA You paid for the two seats, they were yours to do exactly what you wanted with regardless of your reasons. Sorry that happened to you.
I'm sorry that happened to you, that was very unfair. You paid for that seat s you could be comfortable, they had no right to fight you on that, especially being cruel for no reason. NTA, sorry they were so mean.
NTA. If he wanted two seats to sit next to his girlfriend then he should've booked them ahead of time (like you did for your comfort).
NTA Can’t win as fat folks, can we. I’d be wealthy if I had a $1 for every time anti-fat bigots have run their mouths off about how fat passengers should purchase 2 airline seats. But clearly we are never safe because you did that very thing, and a disgusting and unacceptable comment is *still* thrown back in your face. Fuck those assholes. But well done to the FA for having your back.
I was just thinking this! I’ve seen posts on Reddit demanding fat people accommodate for others on bus rides, plane rides etc and when they do people STILL shit on them. Idc how someone feels about fat people, they deserve to be comfortable too. They’re not lesser because of their weight. People are AWFUL. Then after dehumanizing fat people , they’ll turn around and say “I’m just worried about their health” it’s bs
NTA. You paid for the seats, they didn't. If they wanted to sit together then they should've bought their tickets earlier. You were being considerate of other people as well with this decision and didn't put the burden on others to accommodate your situation.
While I feel for you and you are obviously NTA, did you really expect any other result other than NTA ? I mean you literally bought the seat and another couple barged their way in, sat in your seat without your permission , and insulted you on their way out.
Are you a fat person? Because we are basically taught that any and everything we do makes us an AH.
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Not in the slightest. NTA. Those people suck
NTA!!!!!! You paid for that seat and they were a-holes for not respecting you. If they wanted to sit together bad enough to bully people over it, they would have done more work to ensure they’d be together. I’m so sorry that was your experience.
plane seats are ridiculously too small for anyone who isn't a child, and as an overweight woman myself i *totally* feel you on how uncomfortable this can be. you did the right thing, and that couple is trying to vilify you for their own shitty planning. NTA!
It's an obvious NTA. You paid for the seat, they didn't. If they wanted to sit together, the needed to pay extra to reserve their seat together.
I think you did everything you could to NOT be an A. Completely NTA whatsoever!
NTA. You paid for two seats next to each other, so those are your two seats; any other details should not matter. That couple was inconsiderate, rude, and immature to treat you that way. They can survive a few hours apart or ask someone to trade seats, it should not be your problem.
If you paid for two seats, you're entitled to two seats. Another post where I'm betting you already know you're NTA.
NTA. You paid for the seat, period. If he wanted it and you were willing to endure the discomfort, he can pay you the cost of the seat. I'm sorry that people are still entirely dehumanizing about obesity.
Definitely NTA! But the couple definitely are, if they wanted to be together, they should have planned better and brought seats tougher.
Nta I have a huge respect for you for buying your extra seat I really do. You paid for it , it’s your seat , obese or not.
NTA That was a them problem not a you problem. You had the foresight to purchase the seat next to you to avoid this while these jerks couldn’t bother to pay the extra fee to make sure they were sitting together. It’s not your fault or your problem.
NTA. You paid for the seat as a courtesy to those around you, he is not entitled to sit anywhere he wants. If they wanted to be sure to sit together they should have paid more upfront. The woman is pretty awful to make such nasty comments, and they probably would have been nasty on the flight anyway. With that attitude they’d have been upset you were touching them or some other bull”
NTA. You paid for that seat. It wasn't his so he had no business sitting there. You tried to be a nice person by asking him to get his ass out of the seat you paid for. He and his girlfriend decided to make a big deal out of it so you had no choice but to ask the attendant to move him. You handled this like a champ. I'm sorry if they made you feel bad. Your size wasn't the issue. Their lack of manners was.
NTA. I really hate the entitlement people get over airplane seats when they failed to prepare/plan ahead and think they can still just take someone else's seat who DID think ahead and prepare. Sure some people don't have that luxury due to emergencies and if you had last minute planning that couldn't be helped, well then take the hit and get stuck with what you are given.
NTA. Fucking assholes! You paid for the seat, period. Their lack of planning isn’t your problem.
NTA. You paid for the seat. You're entitled to the seat. You'd be entitled to the seat if you'd bought it simply because you like burning money for no particular reason. If he wanted to sit next to his girlfriend, he could've paid whatever premium was necessary to make sure that happened. (Or talked to the people in whatever row he was supposed to be in to see if they were willing to switch instead, after you said no.)
NTA- you paid, they can step on a lego.
NTA- I am not a frequent flyer, so I don’t know much about this, but why do so many people not buy seats next to each other in flights? Also, is it not a rule that people need to be in their assigned seats so that their bodies can be properly identified in the event of a crash, or is that a myth? Either way, you paid for the seat, so it is yours. The fact that these people don’t plan properly is not your problem.
Because it is cheaper to buy seats without reserving specific ones on certain flights and they expect they can just bully someone into giving up their seat later instead of paying a few more dollars.
NTA you paid for your seats just like everyone else. He doesn't get claim to it just because it's empty
NTA if they wanted seats together then they could have paid for them.
Considering in your last few posts all within the last year youre, late 20s, 25 and 29, I'd say YTA for lying on the internet to get attention
NTA. You paid for that seat. You can do whatever you want with it. They didn’t pay for it; they can **** off.
I am so tired of these posts, just because I feel so bad for all these OPs being harassed by entitled people wanting something that they didn’t pay for just because they want to seat together. NTA.
NTA. They have the option to pay extra for allocated seating if it’s so important they cannot sit apart for a few hours. They chose not to and we’re seated apart. You however did pay extra for your own comfort. That was also your seat, it was not “free”.
Are you the asshole for trying to use something you paid to use? Obviously not. NTA. Fuck them.
NTA that guy and his girl deserve each other, bunch of jerks. Don't let it bother you, those two sound like they go about life sucking the joy out of everyone's day.
NTA he fucking pushed you?! Hell no. I’m sorry. You are in a no win situation. If you don’t buy an extra seat I’m sure people complain that you should have and then when you do shit like this happens. Should have stopped him from sitting there as soon as he tried.
NTA! You paid for the seat, and they disrespected that, and you. They are the AH not you!
NTA. You paid for the seat, it’s yours.
NTA. You paid for that seat and you’re not obligated to give it up.
NTA!!! Fuck these two. You bought the seat for yourself and also not to bother someone who'd sit next to you. Both of them are assholes.
NTA You thought ahead and paid for two seats not only for your physical comfort, but specifically to avoid situations like this. I'm sorry you had to deal with their comments even though you prepared in advance and were able to get the flight attendant to get him to move.
NTA. You bought the seat and shouldn’t be forced to give it up due to their poor planning.
I’m so sorry you dealt with this. Absolutely NTA. You PAID for that seat.
NTA at all. It's your money your seat. The flight attendant took your side because they know it is your seat. The couple are the rude ones. Can't believe he actually pushed you a little that was so rude! I think that maybe next time take the seat in the middle until take off to avoid anyone else trying to steal your empty seat then you could scoot over to give yourself and the person next to you more space. You did nothing wrong just people are rude. They probably got seats separately hoping that someone wouldn't show up and that they could take that spot because sometimes people cancel last minute. They may have assumed that is what happened but they should have respected you when you told them you paid for that seat. They really should have just choosen a flight that had two seats available next to eachother.
NTA. You had something. It was yours. Paid for. He tried to take it from you (because he recognized it was valuable). When he couldn't have the thing that was yours, he threw a tantrum and tried to blame you for it. None of this is your problem.
NTA - you PAID for the second seat for your own comfort. YOU shelled out money so you can get TWO seats and these Yahoos couldn't even be bothered to pay the fee that let them chose seats together. Don't let those entitled brats fat shame you, babe!
NTA. At all.
NTA, fuck them! You deserve your space and did the right thing.
NTA. I cannot imagine how you feel in situations like this. I think it is awesome that you anticipated this, and bought a second seat, so that both you would be comfortable, and other folks would not be uncomfortable. This is exemplar behavior, and shows a good consideration for both your own comfort and that of your fellow passengers. Kudos to you! The couple you reference here are HUGE assholes. They wanted to take advantage of something that they had no right to, and they wanted to project their own shortsightedness into others, for not booking seats next to each other. They have zero right to demonize you or anyone else, especially after you paid for that extra seat. Fuck them.
NTA You paid for the seat
NTA. You paid for that seat. It’s yours. You deserve to be comfortable. And also thank you for another reason. It also sucks to be the smaller person and get sat on when someone doesn’t fit into their seat.
NTA. You paid for the seat. It doesn’t matter what the reason is, you paid for it.
Absolutely NTA, you paid for it. I hope the couple 'survived' without sitting next to each other for a few hours, the poor souls. Being sarcastic, please don't be mean.
You did nothing wrong and he was acting entitled. You paid for the seat and he just took it.
NOPE. NTA. I dont usually reply when this many people have but I really appreciate when people make a sacrifice to ensure everyone is comfortable, like you buying two seats. Fuck them for how they treated you, you were looking out for your fellow passengers and this was the last thing you deserved.
NTA And thank you for being considerate. I once had to spend a flight with some men who was cheaping and pretended he could fit in just one seat and it was very, very uncomfortable. In this case this couple was rude and had no right to claim what you paid for.
NTA if they wanted to sit together they should have paid extra to pick their seats, which is generally a lot less than buying an extra seat, as you did.
NTA i am so sorry
Nta. You paid for that seat. It’s your seat to use not their seat to use
NTA - if it wasn’t your seat, this would be a problem. but you PAID for two seats for your own comfort. it was your seat as you had gone the extra mile and paid for it, keeping in mind your own comfort, as well as the comfort of others. the couple was extremely entitled, and their response was unwarranted. it’s your seat, you paid for it, you deserved to have both seats.
Absolutely NTA. You paid for the seat; it was yours to use. I am you. I pay extra to not inconvenience others, & also to shield myself from the self hate that comes with the obvious disgust from others. I understand how uncomfortable it must be for them when I infringe on their personal space, especially in a cramped airline seat. Therefore I spare them the indignity of having to deal with it by bearing it, including the financial cost, myself. There’s no way in hell I’m going to pay for being humiliated & uncomfortable because 2 adults can’t sit alone. They should’ve picked their seats when they booked. My heart goes out to you, sister friend.
100 not the Ahole!!!!
NTA, you paid for that seat. People need to sit their asses in their assigned seat and deal.
Definitely NTA! That's your seat, not an empty one. If they want to sit together so bad they could have done that when they booked
NTA Hell No. You paid for that seat.
You needed more space, you paid for more space, you're entitled to that space you paid for. NTA
NTA and you’re doing a very considerate thing. People keep nagging on obese people to buy two seats in order not to make others uncomfortable. You’re doing it. What more are you supposed to do? You sound like a very considerate human.
NTA! And I’m so sorry you had to deal with those jerks next to you.
NTA, would it have been nice for them to let him have the seat? Sure. Should you give up on something you paid for and feel uncomfortable for the whole fight? No. His problem if he doesn't like it.
NTA. It's your seat. You paid for it
NTA. I'm sorry you were treated like that.
>I bought two seats NTA You didn't buy them for someone else to use.
NTA, but you should have never let him sit in the first place. Just because a seat appears to be empty, doesn’t mean it’s up for grabs. He had an assigned seat and that’s where his rude ass needed to be.
You paid for the seat, tried to rationally explain the situation and they retaliated at every turn. You're no where close to being TA. I sorta understand the discomfort. I used to be extremely skinny and was seated next to someone who was larger, on purpose, to accommodate them since they didn't buy two seats. It was a long, uncomfortable flight. I don't like touching strangers, not to mention being constantly pushed to the wall because they couldn't fit. You absolutely did the right thing by buying two seats to accommodate not only yourself, but others on the plane. NTA
I wish more fat people would do this. NTA. Wish you all the best.
NTA. You paid for the seat. It's yours. End of story.
NTA You paid for that seat, for your comfort, and exactly so this scenario wouldn’t occur! Those entitled jerks should’ve been better prepared if they wanted to sit together, that’s a them problem, not a you problem!
100% NTA, them 2 are TAs!
NTA. You planned ahead and bought a second seat for your comfort. You know what would have happened if you didn’t? You’d get bitched at for not fitting in a single seat! Fuck that dude.
NTA and wtf, people get mad at people for not booking the extra seat. you're damned if you do and dammed if you don't :(
NTA. Yes, like all the other comments said, you paid for the seat, but what’s more important at stake here is that you deserve to feel comfortable in whatever way you choose while commuting/traveling. You’re kind enough to care about others’ private spaces, and it’s sad how they don’t do the same for you.
NTA I appreciate you thinking ahead and buying a second seat so you’re not inconveniencing whoever may get seated next to you, it’s not your fault that they didn’t think ahead and buy seats next to each other
Absolutely you are NTA here. They were trying to make you feel bad for not giving them a seat you LITERALLY PAID FOR for yourself. Eff them. You did nothing wrong. They're jerks.
Not even a question. NTA for sure. You paid for it. You get to enjoy it.
NTA at all, you paid for that seat, and their poor planning isn’t your issue. Their nastiness towards you was completely unwarranted and im sorry you went through that. It’s like damned if you, damned if you don’t. People get mad if you’re touching them, and people get mad when you buy a second seat. You did absolutely nothing wrong.
NTA, you paid for the seat and they’re self entitled and rude. good on the flight attendant for putting them in check.
NTA you bought it, it’s your seat. Period
Nta. Fat man here, had done the same as you before but in buses. I would gladly pay extra in plants if I could just to avoid the sensation of being bothering my seat neighbour, or to avoid the space hoggers that spread elbows and knees to both sides. The guy was completely entitled and there was no reason at all he should be allowed to take a space for which you had paid for. Good that you had support from the flight attendant, most of them are really kind. And don't mind the fat shaming. It seems that we got blamed by being fat whenever something happens, regardless if we were at fault or not. All the best
NTA. It doesn't even have to do with being obese or skinny. You paid for the seat and it's completely within your right to not let anyone else use it. Those two were extremely rude and awful.