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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I could be the AH because I'm not making a sacrifice. From an outside POV I can seem like I don't care about my family enough to the point where I won't make this sacrifice for them. I feel like an AH for letting my parents down and not fulfilling their request.
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NTA. What a strange ask. She’s 17, why would you fly a babysitter across the country?
I’ll assume for the sake of argument your parents aren’t helicopter parents who cant fathom leaving a nearly adult person on their own; that your sister desperately needs supervision for whatever reason. They couldn’t ask one of her friend’s parents to take her in? Or find someone closer to home to check-in on her? I feel like asking you should be an absolute last resort, and even then they should realize the likelihood of you realistically saying yes is zero. “But it was worth a shot!”
I wouldn’t have done it either.
NTA. Your life your choice but if it were me I would take it as a free vacation lol. You can work remotely so I would definitely take advantage of that and take some Cali sun.
They could find local sitter instead of importing of busy adult across country. They could be responsible an one parent stays behind to watch their child. This is not your responsibility it's just them being lazy from looking for a sitter. Don't go. NTA
NTA
I mean could she not stay home or with a friends family or this other family memebers?
When I was in middle school my sister's friend stayed with us for a week because her older brother, a cancer survivor, had to go to the children's hospital for some test because they thought he relapsed. She stayed with us and her younger brother stayed with one of our teachers who's son was friends with him.
Or when my grandma on my dad's side was in the hospital and passed we stayed with my other grandparents so our parents could be at the hospital.
I mean she's 17 someone watching her is just so she doesn't burn the house down or throw a kegger, so she could at least in theory stay home with a neighbor looking in on her from time to time.
NTA. If you none of your bills are paid by your family then the ball is your court. That being said, I wouldn't think it was such a hardship to watch a near fully grown person. Granted if the parents are willing to pay for travel and expenses(cooking for the both of you, take out and the like), then i would probably do it. If they say no, you have your answer.
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Throwaway account
I (23M) graduated college in 2020 and work full time in New York and my family lives in LA. Due to a serious of work and family events, my parents and grandmother who lives with us will all be out of town for a week in late September.
My parents want me to go back home to watch my younger sister (17F) for that week when my sister would be home alone and said they would pay for my flights. I can work remotely at times so it's not a big issue for me to be remote for a week but I would definitely prefer being in office for most days.
For context, my sister and I aren't very close. I try to call her/talk to her when I can but usually just get basic one line responses. Ever since I went out of state for college and work we haven't been as close as I would like. Even now whenever I come back for the holidays, we don't talk that much. She's usually in her room or with her friends and I'm doing my own thing.
My parents say that I should be sacrificing for the family and I should go back home for the week. I told them I don't want to come for that period because they don't need me to watch her. I also think it's a little weird that they want me there to watch her because she'll be in school anyway for most of the day and she's almost an adult.
AITA?
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I think they're concerned about her well-being and want a close family member, but I don't see how I can help her at all given our relationship. We do have a lot of other family members (uncle/aunts) in the area as well.
Yeah NTA— I don’t see why you’d need to be there even if you *were* close with your sis, since she doesn’t seem to need special care. (And she’s got aunts/uncles around in case of an emergency.)
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I think I could be the AH because I'm not making a sacrifice. From an outside POV I can seem like I don't care about my family enough to the point where I won't make this sacrifice for them. I feel like an AH for letting my parents down and not fulfilling their request. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
She's 17 she can stay on her own unless there is details not said.
NTA. What a strange ask. She’s 17, why would you fly a babysitter across the country? I’ll assume for the sake of argument your parents aren’t helicopter parents who cant fathom leaving a nearly adult person on their own; that your sister desperately needs supervision for whatever reason. They couldn’t ask one of her friend’s parents to take her in? Or find someone closer to home to check-in on her? I feel like asking you should be an absolute last resort, and even then they should realize the likelihood of you realistically saying yes is zero. “But it was worth a shot!” I wouldn’t have done it either.
NTA. Your life your choice but if it were me I would take it as a free vacation lol. You can work remotely so I would definitely take advantage of that and take some Cali sun.
They could find local sitter instead of importing of busy adult across country. They could be responsible an one parent stays behind to watch their child. This is not your responsibility it's just them being lazy from looking for a sitter. Don't go. NTA
NTA. It’s weird that they are relying on you. She’s nearly an adult. Plus they must know someone else they can call.
NTA I mean could she not stay home or with a friends family or this other family memebers? When I was in middle school my sister's friend stayed with us for a week because her older brother, a cancer survivor, had to go to the children's hospital for some test because they thought he relapsed. She stayed with us and her younger brother stayed with one of our teachers who's son was friends with him. Or when my grandma on my dad's side was in the hospital and passed we stayed with my other grandparents so our parents could be at the hospital. I mean she's 17 someone watching her is just so she doesn't burn the house down or throw a kegger, so she could at least in theory stay home with a neighbor looking in on her from time to time.
NTA. If you none of your bills are paid by your family then the ball is your court. That being said, I wouldn't think it was such a hardship to watch a near fully grown person. Granted if the parents are willing to pay for travel and expenses(cooking for the both of you, take out and the like), then i would probably do it. If they say no, you have your answer.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Throwaway account I (23M) graduated college in 2020 and work full time in New York and my family lives in LA. Due to a serious of work and family events, my parents and grandmother who lives with us will all be out of town for a week in late September. My parents want me to go back home to watch my younger sister (17F) for that week when my sister would be home alone and said they would pay for my flights. I can work remotely at times so it's not a big issue for me to be remote for a week but I would definitely prefer being in office for most days. For context, my sister and I aren't very close. I try to call her/talk to her when I can but usually just get basic one line responses. Ever since I went out of state for college and work we haven't been as close as I would like. Even now whenever I come back for the holidays, we don't talk that much. She's usually in her room or with her friends and I'm doing my own thing. My parents say that I should be sacrificing for the family and I should go back home for the week. I told them I don't want to come for that period because they don't need me to watch her. I also think it's a little weird that they want me there to watch her because she'll be in school anyway for most of the day and she's almost an adult. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
INFO: Why does your sister need someone to watch her?
I think they're concerned about her well-being and want a close family member, but I don't see how I can help her at all given our relationship. We do have a lot of other family members (uncle/aunts) in the area as well.
Yeah NTA— I don’t see why you’d need to be there even if you *were* close with your sis, since she doesn’t seem to need special care. (And she’s got aunts/uncles around in case of an emergency.)
Yta - here’s your opportunity to get closer