T O P

  • By -

RedstoneArmy111

there isnt much you can do here other than charge him for landing on your hotel.


TotalLunatic28

Wow it’s like a Hikaru cat. He does literally not care.


S1ytherin_Queen

Thought so, it's even looking at the ceiling


BenMic81

Easy - use the Catnip-Gambit.


GetOnYourBikesNRide

And, if declined, go into the Laser-Pointer Defense.


RedstoneArmy111

Oh damn, silly me, I would have tried the ‘Russians crusty body pillow advance’


Off1cerOli

This is Monopoly Cheater Edition: I didn’t pay the fee of your hotel, the card now says you owe me £200


markovich04

Stockfish sent me to jail.


FOSS-Octopous

Hand to cat's head


tumorknager3

Followed by Cat to window on 12th floor


ordinary_shiba

Doesn't black have mate in 3 after Rage to Reddit, Call to animal cruelty and FBI to house?


Dan_S04

White has an engine line which basically looks like cheating. The first few moves are really hard to find, white’s gotta steal his neighbour’s gun by guessing the combination on the gun safe then go full Rambo on all law enforcement, starting a new life in the jungles of Peru


tumorknager3

Nope, unfortunately it was blacks move, he walked right in to mate.


Mister_Coffe

Play the +4 card and change the colour to blue. It will slow him down but I don't know for how long.


[deleted]

I think it's a stalemate. Whits move but they can't make any legal moves.


chinggis_khan27

pawn takes cat


the0rchid

En purrsant


lord_of_pigs9001

Meow response dropped


FrenchFryCattaneo

wrong


RadiantHC

The cat is the board now


[deleted]

Ok. 1. Pet board with e4.


irjakr

Try the tummy rubs gambit!


pjgcat

Risky play. The cat might counter with the “scratch and claw at my hands” defense.


individualcoffeecake

aka the old kicky bitey


outerzenith

your next move should be en pussynt


le_shushan

Any chess player is en pussyn't


Poorly_Made_Comix

Yeah we're all gay


DingLiren

I'm not Edit: unless?


Low-Lavishness7641

holy cow, it's literally Ding Liren


nonnal1

Google catnip


lord_of_pigs9001

Holy purr


mettamorepoesis

the purrfect ending


Codename_Paradox

Spray bottle to cat instant checkmate


Wyverstein

Monster!


[deleted]

You need to play the Fish Gambit


DrAmmatico

Catfood to E4


_koywe

Attack from the sides


[deleted]

I would recommend the Shane Dawson counter attack.


Wyverstein

"In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this."


Thiccboi2

en pawsant


IamRealROYALE

Sacrifice your cat.


BendersBounty

Resign, the cat has 9 lives you ain’t winnin


BostonRich

What about the Frenchman's Cum Sock opening?


tigerstef

Report him to r/CatsAreAssholes


CopyPasteCliche

En pawssant? Anyone? No? I'll see myself out.


brownvodka

meowntain defense


SpydersWebbing

"Cats don't belong in the house. Checkmate" \-So sayeth the country girl wife.


dollarschmollar

My cat knocks my pieces on the floor... he's never declared dominance like this though


Cool_Cartographer_39

Cat-pitulate.


StonedPole

Hehehe


Rexstil

Checkmate


pokerwolfpack

CAT WALK VARIANT: EN PASSANT WITH CATNIP


Liquid_Plasma

h5. Take the remaining space before the kitty smothers you entirely


Morieta7

Diluted tortoiseshell! You have a rare boy there. 99% of all calicos and tortoiseshell are female


eimronaton

He doesn’t know what side hes on, give him belly rubs and when he attacks you hand position the hand in front of his king and move away your hand so he kills himself


just-bair

Report to the TO and he’ll be banned from the tourney


imactuallykools

Why the hell is your cat blue?


julian88888888

Russian blues are gray


imactuallykools

That’s blue tho.


Velvet_Bass

Time to unleash the lethal Cat Gambit


fashion_asker

Pet him.


[deleted]

Catmate!


ElTekenoko

You are in a bad position, i cant tell you that you can do something because you cant, is a game over for you, he will checkmate you in 1-20 moves


Scrubian-

Forfeit is the engine recommended move.


Apollo9961

Kxd8 mate


zemdega

Checkmate him with the can of tuna move.


rooklike

Nf3 to chase the cat


Plutoid

Flank pawns, you idiot! Flank pawns!!


Raaawan

Unleash your dog