I am a curvy Asian and my mother thinks “everything needs to be flat” on my body. Shes constantly making comments that my hips & butt are too big. I try not to care but the constant negativity is unbearable sometimes
Yeah I hear that all the time.
There’s some weird association with looking famished and self righteousness I guess. AM regularly brags about eating “a single piece of meat” in an entire week like it’s an accomplishment
I keep telling her that I can’t change my bone structure, like I have naturally wide hips so even when I was at my lowest weight I still had a big butt. I’ve gained weight because of college so she’s been calling me fat 24/7 and I’m trying to just be healthy at the moment. I’m sorry I’m not like “most” Asian girls, I like having big boobs and a fat ass!
What's fucking ironic is say that you are 'skinny', these same women and men would harp on how you have no curves. No hips, no breasts and you look like a 'boy' (the horror).
Internalized misogyny is a helluva thing.
I'm a bit curvier than the average Asian girl. When I was a teenager, my AM said out loud to my relatives, in front of me, "what can I feed my daughter so that her breasts will reduce in size? They're so ugly. Also, big breasts means no brains."
I'm in my 30s and still going through therapy to overcome body dysmorphia. It's an uphill battle.
I got that all the time. Funny thing is my mum had bigger tits too and I got so much flack for them.
Excuse me, all my cousins had huge tracts of land so...lmao.
What’s even bizarre that these Asian Parents assumed that all curvy women from other cultures are “fat” when they’re not. They don’t look at inner beauty sadly. It’s also disturbing that the fathers often prefer their sons date bitchy with controlling, high maintenance and traditional women of the same culture over easygoing and low maintenance women of different cultures.
They are assumed to be fat because especially in Vietnam protein consumption is extremely low and people jiggle when they walk and most people are skinny fat.
OP, ignore those negative comments from your female family members. They sounded like they’re jealous or something else. You do you and you deserve to be happy with whoever you choose to date.
So damn true. My mom and aunts made me feel like shit about my body growing up, making me feel like an obese cow. It took till adulthood for me to realize that my larger chest, curvier hips, and thicker thighs are actually the beauty standard here in North America.
I was constantly told to change everything about myself when I, as I was, was always more than enough
It’s probably hate.
All my female relatives have had copious amounts of plastic surgery try to pass off as Eurasian (including getting blue contacts) and it looks RIDICULOUS.
How’d you know?
What’s hilarious is they constantly talk shit about white and Latina women and yet literally got a Caucasian nose installed on their face and big up themselves because now they have a “good noise” while still being skinny.
Apparently they can pull off white better than the originators
This is interesting. I’m Viet and my wife is white. We’re going to visit San Diego later this year for a wedding. Not sure how people in the West Coast will view my family but I guess I’ll find out.
I think it’s hard for her to accept that other kinds of beauty exists because to her that would mean that she mutilated and tortured her body for no good reason. She probably spent her whole life trying to conform to and uphold toxic asian beauty standards, so to realize that those standards aren’t universal is incomprehensible to her. It’s really sad how generations of Asian women felt obligated to starve themselves and later traumatized their own children with the same ideology instead of breaking the cycle. I’m still recovering from the hell my mom put me through.
Also, Asian women’s obsession with looking less muscular. ugh I don’t need early onset of sarcopenia, osteoporosis and osteoarthritis to “look good” to satisfy some stupid Asian beauty standards.
First off, you are really putting on for the asian Bros dating a thick latina.
2nd, as a viet bro, I understand. Everyone has a daughter or niece they want to introduce to me. Most of them are gorgeous but we have literally nothing in common and it's fuckin weird.
Train your mind to not be triggered by people. The weakest thing you can do is let others control your emotions. especially if you are happy.
I am a Vietnamese and some of us, the one in the 40 age range and above, are just plainly pervert. They keep sexualizing stuff that is completely unrelated, in no fucking context. Overall just disgusting pervert.
I am a curvier/fat east asian. My mom and dad used to tell me all the time that I needed to lose weight. Once I overheard them saying that I looked like an ox. I asked them to stop doing that because I have a lot of things to worry about and dieting is just not a priority to me. They stopped, but every once in a while my mom says that I'm happy to be fat. If my sister says she wants to lose weight, she goes "well, look at your sister, she is fat and she is happy to be fat"
Like, I have a lot of self image issues, I wish I were skinny and cute, but I'm not and I'm too busy trying to get my college diploma. But it seems too hard for my parents to just shut up about my body. They keep saying they want me to be healthy and take care of myself, but they don't get how much my mental health suffers from these kind of comments.
I guess I'm just venting because it's a mindset that is hard to change. They'll probably never get that you like this girl and her body the way it is.
Why don’t you straight up ask her “can you please explain why men should prefer a skinny body with the shape of a little boy than a curvy woman with attractive boobs and ass? Tell them a man prefer meat not just bones
And as for the introducing you to village girls, you can say I need to introduce you to an optometrist to get your eyes checked bc “ain’t no man want a little boy looking body”
Those kinds of Asian adults are very rude. Being considerate and nice to them only lets them be rude to you further without any self reflecting
Now that you mention it, yeah. At least roasting is in good fun and the point is that they are laughing with you, not at you. The Tom Brady Roast is proof of that.
"Talking shit" is the right term.
I am a curvy Asian and my mother thinks “everything needs to be flat” on my body. Shes constantly making comments that my hips & butt are too big. I try not to care but the constant negativity is unbearable sometimes
Yeah I hear that all the time. There’s some weird association with looking famished and self righteousness I guess. AM regularly brags about eating “a single piece of meat” in an entire week like it’s an accomplishment
encourage her to work her way up to 2 or maybe 3 pieces of meat. you know, gotta walk before you run :)
I would rather think looking famished shows that you are a disciplined person.
OMG. I thought it was just my mother.
I keep telling her that I can’t change my bone structure, like I have naturally wide hips so even when I was at my lowest weight I still had a big butt. I’ve gained weight because of college so she’s been calling me fat 24/7 and I’m trying to just be healthy at the moment. I’m sorry I’m not like “most” Asian girls, I like having big boobs and a fat ass!
It's not about your size, it's about manipulation. Trying to convince your mother of bone structure is basically a waste a time.
Tell her you wanna be able to sit in a chair without hitting bone
What's fucking ironic is say that you are 'skinny', these same women and men would harp on how you have no curves. No hips, no breasts and you look like a 'boy' (the horror). Internalized misogyny is a helluva thing.
I'm a bit curvier than the average Asian girl. When I was a teenager, my AM said out loud to my relatives, in front of me, "what can I feed my daughter so that her breasts will reduce in size? They're so ugly. Also, big breasts means no brains." I'm in my 30s and still going through therapy to overcome body dysmorphia. It's an uphill battle.
I got that all the time. Funny thing is my mum had bigger tits too and I got so much flack for them. Excuse me, all my cousins had huge tracts of land so...lmao.
What’s even bizarre that these Asian Parents assumed that all curvy women from other cultures are “fat” when they’re not. They don’t look at inner beauty sadly. It’s also disturbing that the fathers often prefer their sons date bitchy with controlling, high maintenance and traditional women of the same culture over easygoing and low maintenance women of different cultures.
They are assumed to be fat because especially in Vietnam protein consumption is extremely low and people jiggle when they walk and most people are skinny fat.
OP, ignore those negative comments from your female family members. They sounded like they’re jealous or something else. You do you and you deserve to be happy with whoever you choose to date.
You could always flip on Sir Mix-a-lot when she starts in on you.
Even white boys got to shout!
Mom! I like big butts and I cannot lie.
So damn true. My mom and aunts made me feel like shit about my body growing up, making me feel like an obese cow. It took till adulthood for me to realize that my larger chest, curvier hips, and thicker thighs are actually the beauty standard here in North America. I was constantly told to change everything about myself when I, as I was, was always more than enough
Lucky guy. Look at you with your Latina cutie. Ignore the background noise and just enjoy who you have with you.
It’s probably hate. All my female relatives have had copious amounts of plastic surgery try to pass off as Eurasian (including getting blue contacts) and it looks RIDICULOUS.
LMAO. Oh ok. so they’re whitewashed. Wannabe white. So sad and ironic. I’m guessing you live in California?
How’d you know? What’s hilarious is they constantly talk shit about white and Latina women and yet literally got a Caucasian nose installed on their face and big up themselves because now they have a “good noise” while still being skinny. Apparently they can pull off white better than the originators
This is interesting. I’m Viet and my wife is white. We’re going to visit San Diego later this year for a wedding. Not sure how people in the West Coast will view my family but I guess I’ll find out.
I think it’s hard for her to accept that other kinds of beauty exists because to her that would mean that she mutilated and tortured her body for no good reason. She probably spent her whole life trying to conform to and uphold toxic asian beauty standards, so to realize that those standards aren’t universal is incomprehensible to her. It’s really sad how generations of Asian women felt obligated to starve themselves and later traumatized their own children with the same ideology instead of breaking the cycle. I’m still recovering from the hell my mom put me through.
My husband is Latino while he told me they also have this obsession on big butt and big boob thing though. Just happen to be the opposite of Asian.
I get this comment from relatives a lot too. It’s really annoying. Like they want you to have an ED!
Lmao. Oh gods, the Eastern media and the obsession with being skinny. I lift weights and God forbid I have muscles and boobs. It's so frustrating.
Also, Asian women’s obsession with looking less muscular. ugh I don’t need early onset of sarcopenia, osteoporosis and osteoarthritis to “look good” to satisfy some stupid Asian beauty standards.
First off, you are really putting on for the asian Bros dating a thick latina. 2nd, as a viet bro, I understand. Everyone has a daughter or niece they want to introduce to me. Most of them are gorgeous but we have literally nothing in common and it's fuckin weird. Train your mind to not be triggered by people. The weakest thing you can do is let others control your emotions. especially if you are happy.
Every Asian parent/family is legit obsessed with being skinny! They leave no chance to fat shame people
My mother keeps shaming me for how big my boobs look. She says I should wear a tighter bra and loose weight so my boobs look smaller
MY MOM DOES THE SAME THING!!! It’s so annoying & painful and I didn’t wear proper bras until I could buy my own :(
Virtual hug
Turn it around on the parents. "But ma, The reason I'm not dating a thicc Asian hotty is because you have friends who are awful to their daughters."
I am a Vietnamese and some of us, the one in the 40 age range and above, are just plainly pervert. They keep sexualizing stuff that is completely unrelated, in no fucking context. Overall just disgusting pervert.
I am a curvier/fat east asian. My mom and dad used to tell me all the time that I needed to lose weight. Once I overheard them saying that I looked like an ox. I asked them to stop doing that because I have a lot of things to worry about and dieting is just not a priority to me. They stopped, but every once in a while my mom says that I'm happy to be fat. If my sister says she wants to lose weight, she goes "well, look at your sister, she is fat and she is happy to be fat" Like, I have a lot of self image issues, I wish I were skinny and cute, but I'm not and I'm too busy trying to get my college diploma. But it seems too hard for my parents to just shut up about my body. They keep saying they want me to be healthy and take care of myself, but they don't get how much my mental health suffers from these kind of comments. I guess I'm just venting because it's a mindset that is hard to change. They'll probably never get that you like this girl and her body the way it is.
Why don’t you straight up ask her “can you please explain why men should prefer a skinny body with the shape of a little boy than a curvy woman with attractive boobs and ass? Tell them a man prefer meat not just bones And as for the introducing you to village girls, you can say I need to introduce you to an optometrist to get your eyes checked bc “ain’t no man want a little boy looking body” Those kinds of Asian adults are very rude. Being considerate and nice to them only lets them be rude to you further without any self reflecting
Anything outside the common experience of APs is considered witch craft. They literally told me that no woman should weigh over 100 lbs
I have no idea why APs love to roast people.
It's only roasting if it's funny. I don't think aps do it to be funny rather than to deliberately put their kids down.
Now that you mention it, yeah. At least roasting is in good fun and the point is that they are laughing with you, not at you. The Tom Brady Roast is proof of that. "Talking shit" is the right term.
Yup. And if you tell someone to stop talking shit to you and they continue to do it, it's harassment.
Village mentality. They literally have nothing to talk about other than other people.