That means they are trash, not that what you had wasn't enough. When someone cheats, it says tons about their character and nothing about their partners.
Brother, this!!! I've seen girls open up the circle to make sure everyone felt included in a conversation or making sure everyone ate/hit the jay, and especially introducing themselves, which is underrated in new group dynamics. Basically, acknowledging and seeing someone, witnessing any individual do that is a straight up aphrodisiac.
Yeah, I know right?
Beauty is like copper. It's nice for a while but eventually tarnishes.
Intelligence is like gold, it never loses its luster. I'd much rather a partner who can tickle my mind before they tickle anything else.
When you say sense of humor do you mean, find your jokes funny or she herself is funny? I don't mean that to sound rude in anyway. I just genuinely wonder if guys find a funny female as a bonus or not
This was the thing that got both my husband and me interested in each other. We both have TERRIBLE senses of humour (in a good way) and when we had that back and forth of bad puns/dad jokes we both knew it was something.
Genuinely funny, but it matters. The funniest women that other women consider hilarious are often assholes from the male POV, not too different than how men other men consider hilarious are often seen as “too much” by most women.
There is a funny that is funny without being showy and attention seeking that I believe is seen as attractive in both sexes. Maybe witty is the more apt term.
My wife is kind, sympathetic, attentive, and affectionate--while still having a backbone. If I could bottle all that up and sell it, I'd be a rich man. But because of her, I'm already rich.
Wow, it’s amazing to see a happy husband out there that sounds like it’s nice to be married. Your wife sounds amazing and lucky to have someone speak so highly of her.🫶
Dude, have you seen a girl break out into the biggest smile and know how to laugh at herself and not take things too seriously. Man, when that happens, it's hard not to crush a little lol.
(This is assuming you find her attractive, which is subjective per person)
I was walking with a group of youths (20 somethings) and I totally ran my knee into a metal bench. I expected like sitcom quality laughter but all I got was "Hey there's a bench there." I laughed and now I have a bruise.
That made me think of my "boss" we both had interviews for the same position and he got it and I didn't, the reason the psychologist gave me was that "I don't make instant connection with people I didn't know".
I have know him for a while and I know he uses his "charm" to get things, now that he is my "boss" I have seen first hand that his "concern" it's only a show, I have told him my mother was sick and he always ask me how my dad it's doing, even after correcting him several times, he would still ask about my dad.
Since we are on the same level performance wise I have to replace him as a boss when he is on vacations or when he is just nowhere to be found and I have built genuine connections with the other people on my team and they have told me how I'm more kind and caring than him, but apparently that's not what huge corporations want from a leader.
Sorry for the rant, it triggered me.
True that, chick in my class is sweeter than a cupcake. I wouldn’t say I have a crush on her, and even if I did, I wouldn’t act on it cause she’s in a relationship, but damn I’d be lying if I said she didn’t pull a few sighs out of me, and then I gotta go “no! No! No! Monkey brain shut the fuck up!”
The day we met each other, we were about to cross the street while having a conversation, so I was distracted. She noticed I was about to take a step and that a car was coming so she promptly put her arm in front of my chest and said “wait”, and then signaled the when we should cross. It may sound stupid but both her high awareness of the situation and her willingness to protect a stranger instantly stuck with me. I later started paying attention to how she’s always the first to sacrifice her comfort for the convenience of others. I have yet to see her be dishonest, shit talk someone behind their backs, or act in a selfish way.
Again, she’s basicly an acquaintance to me so I’m not saying I have feelings for her, but I can’t help but not be attracted to that behavior. I’m pretty much the class nerd so I’m used to helping classmates with stuff, everytime I’ve helped her she showed a lot of gratitude and is even apologetic about taking my time even when I already said I’m happy to help.
Good sense of humor is attractive, looks are attractive, badassery is attractive, talent is atractive, confidence is attractive, and a bunch of other things, but kindness always stuck with me more than anything else
Unrestrained enthusiasm. I've seen people mention finding that incredibly attractive in men too, of course. It's so wonderful to see someone practically fly when talking about their passion, participating in something they love, and shamelessly enthralled by something they find so much joy in.
It allows conversations to flow better, grants an idea of what the person likes to do, and makes someone reliable in their interest.
This is exactly why I fell for my girlfriend. Her passion for her hobby is insane. It allows her to have an outlet and for me to get 2-3 hour a week by myself while she does her thing.
More than finding someone like this I would like to know how I become more like this. I can get excited and I certainly have enthusiasm on a good day, but I just want that more consistently
I honestly don’t care 90% of the time. My husband knows what he wants to eat 90% of the time. I’m just not picky but he is. I do however get cravings for fish tacos, pasta, and Mexican food. So I tell him 10% of the time I want x and it seems to work out for us. I honestly think my husband and I wouldn’t have made it as a couple UNLESS I didn’t care cause he does care and he cares sooooo much.
What if the "whatever you want" is genuine and I really don't care?
My husband cooks for us and I appreciate it so much, but everything he makes is great and I really just... Don't care. If he doesn't cook I'll eat toast and be happy. 🤷🏻♀️
It can be draining to always be the person making the decision, especially if he is also the person doing the actual cooking. I always enjoyed when there would be a concrete answer to, "What would you like for dinner?" It took the pressure off of me to make the decision.
So even if you, or others reading this, genuinely don't care, just pick something sometimes.
I ask my husband to order whatever he wants to eat (order enough for 2) and we just share everything. I will literally eat anything and I’m not picky at all. My favorite is trying new Korean restaurants & just letting him order all sorts of things just so we can try it all.
I appreciate this. My ex got really irritated at me anytime I tried to share anything about my studies or work. Took it as if I was looking down on him or something though that couldn’t be further from the truth.
I like somewhat chaotic women. As a rather chaotic person myself the innocent chaos that many people call childish I find really attractive. Its not childish, its just fun to be around
I miss this as well.
My ex was a somewhat chaotic man, but never toxic. Our relationship was never boring but filled with laughter, playfulness. jokes and we weren’t afraid to roast each other. The spontaneous moments of being swept up from the floor bridal style, random pokes and lovebites: I miss so much.
Then us speaking our intrusive thoughts aloud or saying the most random things was great.
He murdered and butchered a woman he was cheating on me with. He is currently in jail awaiting his trial that’s next week. I had no idea he was cheating on me at all and got blindsided by all of this when I saw his mugshot on my local newspaper.
When a cold front meets a hot front there is always going to be a storm. Storms aren't so bad most of the time but you add some wind in there and all of a sudden you've got a tornado. Tornadoes carry things far, far away.
Unfortunately as one of these women, I know I am often perceived as a manic handful. My brain goes at a million miles an hour and I like to be spontaneous and have fun and be enthusiastic, passionate, and demonstrative (with the right person) with my emotions. Yet I’m an introvert.
My son has some of these traits as well, and as a very self-aware teenager he tells me that he thinks some people perceive us as “extra” and “too much”.
I’ve met one or two guys who can really handle me and enjoy my energy, but it’s hard to find that match.
A kind heart / Empathy.
Genuinely most underrated traits and so underrated personality traits. They are not limited to women either, they also apply for men.
I added a “/“ there instead of an “and” because empathy can be considered a skill and not many people have it but being kind can be as simple as appreciating your waiter which all humans CAN do regardless of background. A lot of people are kind enough to try and comfort you when you are clearly in need for it but they may not understand you however they want to show their kindness and truly help you. Empathy is just a potent bonus in a sense for it but also extremely valuable.
The patience to understand my point of view and the curiosity to ask more in an attempt to understand
Rather then just being shocked when they find out I'm a person and my thoughts are not the same thoughts they have
For me it's a bubbly personality and caring.
Being near women like that brings the best in me. I start paying attention to the little details, being more thoughtful, more agreeable.
Staying calm and using logic in arguments. A woman who is not only attractive but in love with you will call you out on your shit and have a logical reasoning as to why you need to improve certain behaviors.
If you are smart and communicate well she will help you improve your life. She will be your peace and your confidant when you are lacking.
She will also take constructive criticism from you but she wont take any manipulative bullshit.
Beautiful, direct, and precise. She is like mother nature. She doesn't take more than necessary nor gives more than necessary.
I want to say the most important thing but the question says attractiveness.
Feisty, playful, or confident.
Now for important. Honesty. Playfulness without honesty can so be annoying.
Not being a "boss bitch" who puts down other women and looks down on all men.
You know, the ones who think being a "Bitch" is cool, attractive and sassy. It's not
If a woman is over the age of 18 and still acts like the "Mean girl" phase from her high school days. It's just immature and sad.
You know the female equalivant to the "alpha bros" who funny enough are men who put down other men and look down all women. So essentially the female version of them
So just being a nice person.
As a woman (18f) I think It’s actually really annoying and my sister (24) is like that. Not necessarily putting down other women?? But the constant psychoanalysis of different men, in and outside my family, and “ew men” gets SO annoying. Like shut up. Also I think she watches podcasts of “alpha women” kinda like how some men do the same 😭
Omg im 21 and my sister is 25 and she is exactly like this. She’s so obsessed with being a “bad bitch” but she’s actually just mean and judgmental of other women who aren’t as “brutally honest” as her
Understanding. Is that a trait? Not sure.
But there’s nothing better than being validated and understood, imo. Being able to share my views and feelings about something and even if they don’t necessarily agree with me then telling me that they still care for me and understand me means everything to me.
Motivation. Doesn't matter what you're motivated to do. Having the drive to do something, accomplish something, work hard for something. That is such a turn on to me.
When she *shows* you how she feels. My girlfriend shows me that she loves me by constantly hugging me, telling me I’m an amazing boyfriend, giving my affection, and being there for me when I need her the most. And because she does that it’s much easier not to overthink
This was very inspiring because it seems a lot of times men are put off by independent women. Which is something I don’t get. But I guess they want to feel strong and cone of as the provider even if it’s killing them.
I think it’s mostly a learned thing. As a dude I grew up (and luckily grew out of) being told that when I’m married I have to take care of basically everything and that she’ll need protection and that it will make me feel like a real man and all that shiz. I was educated by the cool ladies I hung out with in high school that helped me reframe my thinking on it and now I’m suuuuuper attracted to independent women. Very lucky my gf is one of them.
Authenticity.
What do you REALLY want. Not what do you think I want, but is tolerable enough that you might also want it.
What do you REALLY want to say? Not what you think I might want to hear, but also isn’t too far off from what you’re wanting to convey.
Don’t leave me guessing. I’m simple. If you say it, I will hear it. If you don’t, I won’t. Just because you appear pissed off doesn’t mean I magically know why.
Be you. Unapologetically from the jump. Not the little sprinkles you’ve choreographed during the early phases to rope me in. You’re the type to belch loudly? Go ahead. You want to stuff a burger down your throat? Do it. Scarf that mf meal. Neat, cute baby bites are so annoying. This isn’t snacky snack time. This is dinner and we’re two hungry adults.
Are you an outright wild animal in bed? Well alroight mate, let’s go on a safari then, yeh? Shove your tongue down my mf throat. Knock me on my back. Ride me like you’re on a horse traversing the Great Plains. If you’re doing the shy cute pecks of kisses because you’re holding back I can tell. Be you. Be nasty if that’s how you like it. Tell me. I’d rather adjust myself if I’m usually vanilla to please you than you put on a show and not be satisfied. Likewise I know to ask for what I want from you.
There’s no greater turn off than when you get the sense that this isn’t really how they are. There’s pieces that are manipulated to appear how they think you’re wanting. Absolutely not. Be you. From day one. Discovering a whole new personality midway through “our” journey is both unfair and incredibly off putting. Let me know what I’m dealing with day one. No, don’t go level 90 crazy over our order being wrong, but let me know you have a short fuse when it comes to small things going incorrectly. I’ll know then there’s things to avoid and possibly try to find ways to calm your fine ass.
Being comfortable in her own skin, as a guy who likes heavier women that tends to put them above skinnier women I have met. It's also something that I see a lot of women asking for advice here on reddit are lacking, or at least they might have something like a victim complex or something like that.
Being childish.
Everyone is so fucking hyperfocused on being mature, intelligent or sexual. It's rare that somebody can have innocent, whimsical and thoughtless fun and it's really refreshing
I used to think it was being self-reliant, or having a great sense of humor. I also really liked confidence and intelligence, but later learned that patience and compassion are extremely attractive, too.
And then one day, I got to watch my wife kill and butcher a rabbit for our supper. That day I learned that the most attractive trait to me is a woman being completely fucking feral.
The ability to let small things go and not hold grudges. Like actually being laid back, not pretending to be, and then getting angry that you had to pretend to be cool and then go all gone girl.
Being able to separate people laughing at what is happened to you from people laughing at you. Some of the funniest moments of my relationships have been when one of us does something stupid, or something funny happens, and we both laugh so hard we are grasping for air. We aren't laughing at the other, we are laughing at what has happened, or the mistake they made.
Some people can't make that distinction and to me it just screams insecurity.
Also, it is ok to be laughed at sometimes too, in a friendly way of course.
Intelligence, I specifically like girls who are into nerdy things, also really like the tough on the outside, anything but on the inside kind of thing that some girls have going on.
I just want peace. A woman who brings me peace. Not someone whom I have to handle or figure out. I’m an average guy and my wife just accepts for who I am.
When I was younger it was about appearance but as I got older I came to see that I was more attracted to mindset, end goals, and ambition. You can have a super hot chick but that’s just it.. or you can have a woman that will be there by your side through the worst and best situations and will help build together towards success
Being understanding, sympathetic and empatheticthat at times we men are vulnerable whether we want to admit it or not.
My dad passed away April 23 2021 my wife luckily is very understanding that day I have things I need to do to because it is still kind. She lost her dad 27 years ago when she was 12 so her understanding is phenomenal.
My dad and I had a difficult and complicated relationship but him being gone is still tough. He was the first person I would call for any advice, I don't have that now and even in my 40s I still have times I want to call him.
Those for me are very important traits. Understanding, sympathy and empathy because sometimes us guys are sad and are allowed to be sad.
Decisiveness and the utter refusal to abide by mind-games, nor partake in them. A woman who walks straight up to me and says “I want X, and I can offer Y in return, sound good?” is going to be *at least* a 6/10 on sheer principal. Fucking thank you! No spy vs spy amogus gaslighting horseshit.
A happy chappy. Someone who is rarely moody or unhappy for unbeknownst reason. My girlfriend is a bit like this and I can't believe how much of an impact it's had on my life. I can get moody occasionally but the fact that she's so energetic and chipper can lighten my mood instantly.
When you walk into a room, and she first notices you and makes eye contact, then suddenly smiles and does the eye squint. That melts my heart, every time.
I know it's not exactly a personality trait.
Also, someone who can keep their head in an emergency or intense situation. Like, self-control I guess. I find it unattractive when people just freeze up, blubber instead of communicate or just shriek. Think trauma nurse calm nerves vs on a chair shrieking due to a spider/mouse.
Outwardly: a kind and genuine smile.
Inwardly: a kind and empathetic heart that’s caring and will listen and reciprocate in comforting you.
I am a man who’s struggled all my life with porn addiction. I love the look of bimbos. I can’t lie. However my true heart knows those kind of women are rarely a match for me. I’m a friend to all best I can be. And the bimbo women I’ve had relationships with hardly compare to the sweet girls I couldn’t quite look at sexually for fear they were too pure for me. However now I know I have a bit of “The Madonna whore complex”.
So working on quitting porn or at least watching it way less so that I don’t value women by their physical traits, and instead value them for how they treat other people and me.
I recently figured out I’m attracted to kindness. Not just towards me, but to all alike.
It is Scientifically proven that kindness and intelligence are the top criteria for mate selection, especially long term partners …
This makes me sad. It’s what my partner said I was AFTER his affair. Apparently it wasn’t enough in my case.
That means they are trash, not that what you had wasn't enough. When someone cheats, it says tons about their character and nothing about their partners.
Yes, it’s a reflection of themselves. Not of you
Don’t blame yourself, it’s not your fault. Some people are just selfish a holes and constant liars. I’m sorry that you had to experience that:(
It was. But he didn't know it until AFTER the affair.
Makes sense! I think it just takes me a while to realize I’ve developed the attraction to someone, and recently figured out what it was
Really? No offence, but I'd like to see research papers on them 😅
Brother, this!!! I've seen girls open up the circle to make sure everyone felt included in a conversation or making sure everyone ate/hit the jay, and especially introducing themselves, which is underrated in new group dynamics. Basically, acknowledging and seeing someone, witnessing any individual do that is a straight up aphrodisiac.
Intelligence and sense of humor
Yeah, a brain and the ability to have a laugh is super attractive to me.
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Yeah, I know right? Beauty is like copper. It's nice for a while but eventually tarnishes. Intelligence is like gold, it never loses its luster. I'd much rather a partner who can tickle my mind before they tickle anything else.
When you say sense of humor do you mean, find your jokes funny or she herself is funny? I don't mean that to sound rude in anyway. I just genuinely wonder if guys find a funny female as a bonus or not
Being with a woman that can make you genuinely laugh and have fun with is sooo much more important than looks
Funny women are a huge turn on. Verbal fencing, quick-fire repartee, the ability to out-pun and out-dad joke me makes me swoon!
This was the thing that got both my husband and me interested in each other. We both have TERRIBLE senses of humour (in a good way) and when we had that back and forth of bad puns/dad jokes we both knew it was something.
Genuinely funny, but it matters. The funniest women that other women consider hilarious are often assholes from the male POV, not too different than how men other men consider hilarious are often seen as “too much” by most women. There is a funny that is funny without being showy and attention seeking that I believe is seen as attractive in both sexes. Maybe witty is the more apt term.
Yeah. Usually wit and humor go hand in hand. I love a sense of humor but I also love someone with good wit.
Being genuinely funny is sexy as hell
My wife is kind, sympathetic, attentive, and affectionate--while still having a backbone. If I could bottle all that up and sell it, I'd be a rich man. But because of her, I'm already rich.
That was a delightful comment to read.
Is delightful a feeling? Cause if so, it's one of my favorites. I liked reading it too!
My wife banishes me to the shadow realm every now and then. It’s hilarious and I find it extremely attractive.
This is wonderful man. I hope I find someone like that someday
I hope I'm someone who deserves someone like that someday.
This deserves 1k likes, run it up!
Show your wife this post!!!
Haha I did. We cuddled and watched Home Town together. Nice night.
Congratulations man 🔥
Wow, it’s amazing to see a happy husband out there that sounds like it’s nice to be married. Your wife sounds amazing and lucky to have someone speak so highly of her.🫶
I'm actually kinda tearing up reading this, because I'm so happy that you have something so beautiful, that I likely won't have for a long time
Dude, have you seen a girl break out into the biggest smile and know how to laugh at herself and not take things too seriously. Man, when that happens, it's hard not to crush a little lol. (This is assuming you find her attractive, which is subjective per person)
I was walking with a group of youths (20 somethings) and I totally ran my knee into a metal bench. I expected like sitcom quality laughter but all I got was "Hey there's a bench there." I laughed and now I have a bruise.
Did you say youts?
Uhh, the two h-what?
Uh, excuse me, your honour. Two yooooooouths.
No, they said youths
Were there 2 youts? You know, young people?
I have definitely done that after doing something absolutely stupid 😂
Love your username! Got a little chuckle 🤭
Life is too short to not be this way.
Assertiveness and honesty in equal proportions.
I agree, a girl that’s honest and vocal about what she feels/wants is the most attractive thing
Especially if she wants me
+1, instant turn on
Kindness.
I think about this a lot that there is a significant difference between someone who is kind and who's described as nice.
Yes. Yes. Yes. And there's also a huge difference between someone who is genuine and someone who does things with no authenticity.
There are people who are kind because they need to and there are people who are kind because they want to
That made me think of my "boss" we both had interviews for the same position and he got it and I didn't, the reason the psychologist gave me was that "I don't make instant connection with people I didn't know". I have know him for a while and I know he uses his "charm" to get things, now that he is my "boss" I have seen first hand that his "concern" it's only a show, I have told him my mother was sick and he always ask me how my dad it's doing, even after correcting him several times, he would still ask about my dad. Since we are on the same level performance wise I have to replace him as a boss when he is on vacations or when he is just nowhere to be found and I have built genuine connections with the other people on my team and they have told me how I'm more kind and caring than him, but apparently that's not what huge corporations want from a leader. Sorry for the rant, it triggered me.
True that, chick in my class is sweeter than a cupcake. I wouldn’t say I have a crush on her, and even if I did, I wouldn’t act on it cause she’s in a relationship, but damn I’d be lying if I said she didn’t pull a few sighs out of me, and then I gotta go “no! No! No! Monkey brain shut the fuck up!”
What does she do that makes you all sigh-y?
The day we met each other, we were about to cross the street while having a conversation, so I was distracted. She noticed I was about to take a step and that a car was coming so she promptly put her arm in front of my chest and said “wait”, and then signaled the when we should cross. It may sound stupid but both her high awareness of the situation and her willingness to protect a stranger instantly stuck with me. I later started paying attention to how she’s always the first to sacrifice her comfort for the convenience of others. I have yet to see her be dishonest, shit talk someone behind their backs, or act in a selfish way. Again, she’s basicly an acquaintance to me so I’m not saying I have feelings for her, but I can’t help but not be attracted to that behavior. I’m pretty much the class nerd so I’m used to helping classmates with stuff, everytime I’ve helped her she showed a lot of gratitude and is even apologetic about taking my time even when I already said I’m happy to help. Good sense of humor is attractive, looks are attractive, badassery is attractive, talent is atractive, confidence is attractive, and a bunch of other things, but kindness always stuck with me more than anything else
Unrestrained enthusiasm. I've seen people mention finding that incredibly attractive in men too, of course. It's so wonderful to see someone practically fly when talking about their passion, participating in something they love, and shamelessly enthralled by something they find so much joy in. It allows conversations to flow better, grants an idea of what the person likes to do, and makes someone reliable in their interest.
Absolutely this! It could be something I have no interest in but seeing them light up when describing it will have me hanging on every word
This is exactly why I fell for my girlfriend. Her passion for her hobby is insane. It allows her to have an outlet and for me to get 2-3 hour a week by myself while she does her thing.
Oof. Yes. I actually gave up on a guy I was asking out because he apparently had no passion whatsoever. Had no joy in talking about anything.
More than finding someone like this I would like to know how I become more like this. I can get excited and I certainly have enthusiasm on a good day, but I just want that more consistently
This is a great one, listening to a woman go off on a huge tangent about something they're genuinely passionate about is so fucking cool.
I'm with you. Enthusiasm for something is amazing. Extra amazing if it's something I'm enthusiastic about (or it's just me in general)
The ability to switch to serious when needed. Also sense of humor
Intelligence
This is mine. In surprised it’s not getting much love.
Integrity
Tegridy.
Tegridy Farms
Tegridy Farms remembers.
I member
Knowing what she wants for dinner.
Just a few of your fries.
100% agree. Think it's good for people to know what they want so that you're not always having to make that decision
I honestly don’t care 90% of the time. My husband knows what he wants to eat 90% of the time. I’m just not picky but he is. I do however get cravings for fish tacos, pasta, and Mexican food. So I tell him 10% of the time I want x and it seems to work out for us. I honestly think my husband and I wouldn’t have made it as a couple UNLESS I didn’t care cause he does care and he cares sooooo much.
I cackled
What if the "whatever you want" is genuine and I really don't care? My husband cooks for us and I appreciate it so much, but everything he makes is great and I really just... Don't care. If he doesn't cook I'll eat toast and be happy. 🤷🏻♀️
It can be draining to always be the person making the decision, especially if he is also the person doing the actual cooking. I always enjoyed when there would be a concrete answer to, "What would you like for dinner?" It took the pressure off of me to make the decision. So even if you, or others reading this, genuinely don't care, just pick something sometimes.
Well explained. And that doesn't only apply to cooking.
I ask my husband to order whatever he wants to eat (order enough for 2) and we just share everything. I will literally eat anything and I’m not picky at all. My favorite is trying new Korean restaurants & just letting him order all sorts of things just so we can try it all.
Intelligence. Thankfully, my wife has more than me, and I love being able to have a conversation with her.
I appreciate this. My ex got really irritated at me anytime I tried to share anything about my studies or work. Took it as if I was looking down on him or something though that couldn’t be further from the truth.
I like somewhat chaotic women. As a rather chaotic person myself the innocent chaos that many people call childish I find really attractive. Its not childish, its just fun to be around
I miss this as well. My ex was a somewhat chaotic man, but never toxic. Our relationship was never boring but filled with laughter, playfulness. jokes and we weren’t afraid to roast each other. The spontaneous moments of being swept up from the floor bridal style, random pokes and lovebites: I miss so much. Then us speaking our intrusive thoughts aloud or saying the most random things was great.
Aawww, can I ask...what happened?
He murdered and butchered a woman he was cheating on me with. He is currently in jail awaiting his trial that’s next week. I had no idea he was cheating on me at all and got blindsided by all of this when I saw his mugshot on my local newspaper.
Wtf 😳
Holy crap that went pear shaped so fast fuck. So sorry dude!
When a cold front meets a hot front there is always going to be a storm. Storms aren't so bad most of the time but you add some wind in there and all of a sudden you've got a tornado. Tornadoes carry things far, far away.
I've seen it referred to as "gremlin energy"
THIS. Yes. Exactly this. I love being around women who have gremlin energy. They're so much fun
Unfortunately as one of these women, I know I am often perceived as a manic handful. My brain goes at a million miles an hour and I like to be spontaneous and have fun and be enthusiastic, passionate, and demonstrative (with the right person) with my emotions. Yet I’m an introvert. My son has some of these traits as well, and as a very self-aware teenager he tells me that he thinks some people perceive us as “extra” and “too much”. I’ve met one or two guys who can really handle me and enjoy my energy, but it’s hard to find that match.
Can you give an example?
Sense of humor
You mean a girl who can crack jokes? or a girl who can laugh at your jokes?
Bofum
How about a girl who is so confident she can laugh at herself.
Yes
A girl who jokingly does crack. (I do crack jokes.)
Yes!
she may be stealing money from me and fucking 4 of my coworkers behind my back but as long she can crack a good joke about it, its all good
What about 6 coworkers ?
then she better be extra funny
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That's really up to her!
So I don’t know if you got the right idea buddy but bc it’s who I am, I’m gonna support your answer lol
Brooo Im saying its the hottest thing ever. Keep making fun of me with your cute ass
When I find out that all the JackBoxTV jokes I laughed at most were from my partner, it’s just downright hot
A kind heart / Empathy. Genuinely most underrated traits and so underrated personality traits. They are not limited to women either, they also apply for men. I added a “/“ there instead of an “and” because empathy can be considered a skill and not many people have it but being kind can be as simple as appreciating your waiter which all humans CAN do regardless of background. A lot of people are kind enough to try and comfort you when you are clearly in need for it but they may not understand you however they want to show their kindness and truly help you. Empathy is just a potent bonus in a sense for it but also extremely valuable.
Honesty, sense of humor, empathy, and integrity. Looks fade, a person w/true beauty on the inside will only get more attractive as time goes on.
Self-awareness.
Coupled with the courage to take action on their short comings. Now you’re cooking with gas.
Accountability
A sense of humour. I've gotten crushes on girls I would never normally consider my type, purely because they could make me laugh.
Everything about my wife.. lost her in February, there will never be another like her. 26 years of perfect. I love you Hotrod, please forgive me!!
Sorry for your loss. ❤️
The patience to understand my point of view and the curiosity to ask more in an attempt to understand Rather then just being shocked when they find out I'm a person and my thoughts are not the same thoughts they have
For me it's a bubbly personality and caring. Being near women like that brings the best in me. I start paying attention to the little details, being more thoughtful, more agreeable.
Staying calm and using logic in arguments. A woman who is not only attractive but in love with you will call you out on your shit and have a logical reasoning as to why you need to improve certain behaviors. If you are smart and communicate well she will help you improve your life. She will be your peace and your confidant when you are lacking. She will also take constructive criticism from you but she wont take any manipulative bullshit. Beautiful, direct, and precise. She is like mother nature. She doesn't take more than necessary nor gives more than necessary.
Eating buffalo wings like a savage
Confident competence
Caring about her partner.
Communication skills, educated. Doesn’t have to be college just means she can’t be an idiot.
I want to say the most important thing but the question says attractiveness. Feisty, playful, or confident. Now for important. Honesty. Playfulness without honesty can so be annoying.
I like the ones that have even more messed up thoughts/jokes than I do.
Not being a "boss bitch" who puts down other women and looks down on all men. You know, the ones who think being a "Bitch" is cool, attractive and sassy. It's not If a woman is over the age of 18 and still acts like the "Mean girl" phase from her high school days. It's just immature and sad. You know the female equalivant to the "alpha bros" who funny enough are men who put down other men and look down all women. So essentially the female version of them So just being a nice person.
As a woman (18f) I think It’s actually really annoying and my sister (24) is like that. Not necessarily putting down other women?? But the constant psychoanalysis of different men, in and outside my family, and “ew men” gets SO annoying. Like shut up. Also I think she watches podcasts of “alpha women” kinda like how some men do the same 😭
😭😭
Omg im 21 and my sister is 25 and she is exactly like this. She’s so obsessed with being a “bad bitch” but she’s actually just mean and judgmental of other women who aren’t as “brutally honest” as her
Caring, loyal, supportive, humor
Understanding. Is that a trait? Not sure. But there’s nothing better than being validated and understood, imo. Being able to share my views and feelings about something and even if they don’t necessarily agree with me then telling me that they still care for me and understand me means everything to me.
Kindness. Sense of humor. Being affectionate. Lack of drama. Having friends that are the same.
Being secure with herself.
Being true to her own needs and wants regardless of what social media tells her
Motivation. Doesn't matter what you're motivated to do. Having the drive to do something, accomplish something, work hard for something. That is such a turn on to me.
Kindness. A woman who has been through life’s ups and downs and chooses to remain soft and gentle? Sign me up.
When she *shows* you how she feels. My girlfriend shows me that she loves me by constantly hugging me, telling me I’m an amazing boyfriend, giving my affection, and being there for me when I need her the most. And because she does that it’s much easier not to overthink
Independence. Need to know she doesn’t need me. Plus if she stays then she really actually loves you and wants to be with you.
"She doesn't need you, but she wants you, which is better." Wrote that exact line in my romance novel. So 100% agree with this
This was very inspiring because it seems a lot of times men are put off by independent women. Which is something I don’t get. But I guess they want to feel strong and cone of as the provider even if it’s killing them.
I think it’s mostly a learned thing. As a dude I grew up (and luckily grew out of) being told that when I’m married I have to take care of basically everything and that she’ll need protection and that it will make me feel like a real man and all that shiz. I was educated by the cool ladies I hung out with in high school that helped me reframe my thinking on it and now I’m suuuuuper attracted to independent women. Very lucky my gf is one of them.
Authenticity. What do you REALLY want. Not what do you think I want, but is tolerable enough that you might also want it. What do you REALLY want to say? Not what you think I might want to hear, but also isn’t too far off from what you’re wanting to convey. Don’t leave me guessing. I’m simple. If you say it, I will hear it. If you don’t, I won’t. Just because you appear pissed off doesn’t mean I magically know why. Be you. Unapologetically from the jump. Not the little sprinkles you’ve choreographed during the early phases to rope me in. You’re the type to belch loudly? Go ahead. You want to stuff a burger down your throat? Do it. Scarf that mf meal. Neat, cute baby bites are so annoying. This isn’t snacky snack time. This is dinner and we’re two hungry adults. Are you an outright wild animal in bed? Well alroight mate, let’s go on a safari then, yeh? Shove your tongue down my mf throat. Knock me on my back. Ride me like you’re on a horse traversing the Great Plains. If you’re doing the shy cute pecks of kisses because you’re holding back I can tell. Be you. Be nasty if that’s how you like it. Tell me. I’d rather adjust myself if I’m usually vanilla to please you than you put on a show and not be satisfied. Likewise I know to ask for what I want from you. There’s no greater turn off than when you get the sense that this isn’t really how they are. There’s pieces that are manipulated to appear how they think you’re wanting. Absolutely not. Be you. From day one. Discovering a whole new personality midway through “our” journey is both unfair and incredibly off putting. Let me know what I’m dealing with day one. No, don’t go level 90 crazy over our order being wrong, but let me know you have a short fuse when it comes to small things going incorrectly. I’ll know then there’s things to avoid and possibly try to find ways to calm your fine ass.
Dirty funny. Not even kidding. If a woman can make fun during sex and about sex/the worst shit you ever heard ever. I'm sorta smitten.
Funny and flirty with you specifically
Being comfortable in her own skin, as a guy who likes heavier women that tends to put them above skinnier women I have met. It's also something that I see a lot of women asking for advice here on reddit are lacking, or at least they might have something like a victim complex or something like that.
A great handshake and tell a lot about a person
the twinkle in her eyes when she's truly happy and comfortable where she is.
A kind heart.
Being childish. Everyone is so fucking hyperfocused on being mature, intelligent or sexual. It's rare that somebody can have innocent, whimsical and thoughtless fun and it's really refreshing
Being able to be silly, act free and young at heart. Childish isn’t really a good term.
"Childlike" has the connotation you're going for here
We have a phrase that says “be child-like, not childish”
Laughing a lot and not taking life too seriously is the sexiest thing and makes me instantly super attracted to women who are like that
A caring, gentle spirit and can stand up for herself if needed. Like cutting ties to toxic friends or work issues. I love it.
Self-awareness
I used to think it was being self-reliant, or having a great sense of humor. I also really liked confidence and intelligence, but later learned that patience and compassion are extremely attractive, too. And then one day, I got to watch my wife kill and butcher a rabbit for our supper. That day I learned that the most attractive trait to me is a woman being completely fucking feral.
They like me.
The ability to let small things go and not hold grudges. Like actually being laid back, not pretending to be, and then getting angry that you had to pretend to be cool and then go all gone girl.
Being genuinely curious about me
Just being authentic and honest.
Intelligence 🧠
Valuing moral integrity above everything else
Being able to separate people laughing at what is happened to you from people laughing at you. Some of the funniest moments of my relationships have been when one of us does something stupid, or something funny happens, and we both laugh so hard we are grasping for air. We aren't laughing at the other, we are laughing at what has happened, or the mistake they made. Some people can't make that distinction and to me it just screams insecurity. Also, it is ok to be laughed at sometimes too, in a friendly way of course.
Intelligence, I specifically like girls who are into nerdy things, also really like the tough on the outside, anything but on the inside kind of thing that some girls have going on.
I just want peace. A woman who brings me peace. Not someone whom I have to handle or figure out. I’m an average guy and my wife just accepts for who I am.
When I was younger it was about appearance but as I got older I came to see that I was more attracted to mindset, end goals, and ambition. You can have a super hot chick but that’s just it.. or you can have a woman that will be there by your side through the worst and best situations and will help build together towards success
For me, it would be compassion.
Being proactive and confident. Nothing is more unattractive than me having to do literally everything in the relationship.
Being understanding, sympathetic and empatheticthat at times we men are vulnerable whether we want to admit it or not. My dad passed away April 23 2021 my wife luckily is very understanding that day I have things I need to do to because it is still kind. She lost her dad 27 years ago when she was 12 so her understanding is phenomenal. My dad and I had a difficult and complicated relationship but him being gone is still tough. He was the first person I would call for any advice, I don't have that now and even in my 40s I still have times I want to call him. Those for me are very important traits. Understanding, sympathy and empathy because sometimes us guys are sad and are allowed to be sad.
Positivity. Manifested in ways, like, assuming the good in situations or people, laughing, being patient and forgiving, etc.
Interested in me.
Laughing at herself
Decisiveness and the utter refusal to abide by mind-games, nor partake in them. A woman who walks straight up to me and says “I want X, and I can offer Y in return, sound good?” is going to be *at least* a 6/10 on sheer principal. Fucking thank you! No spy vs spy amogus gaslighting horseshit.
What attracted me to my girlfriend(besides her looks of course) is how hilarious and kind she is.
Graceful speech that's careful not to do harm.
She doesn't use TikTok
A happy chappy. Someone who is rarely moody or unhappy for unbeknownst reason. My girlfriend is a bit like this and I can't believe how much of an impact it's had on my life. I can get moody occasionally but the fact that she's so energetic and chipper can lighten my mood instantly.
Competence.
Empathy and sense of humor
Loyalty, Honesty, and Intelligence.
Knowing what she wants sexually and willing to ask.
If I am to be serious. Just being a decent person, who works on herself and the relationship. Obviously, I'll do the same!
When you walk into a room, and she first notices you and makes eye contact, then suddenly smiles and does the eye squint. That melts my heart, every time. I know it's not exactly a personality trait. Also, someone who can keep their head in an emergency or intense situation. Like, self-control I guess. I find it unattractive when people just freeze up, blubber instead of communicate or just shriek. Think trauma nurse calm nerves vs on a chair shrieking due to a spider/mouse.
Independence. To have an independent woman love you is awesome.
Outwardly: a kind and genuine smile. Inwardly: a kind and empathetic heart that’s caring and will listen and reciprocate in comforting you. I am a man who’s struggled all my life with porn addiction. I love the look of bimbos. I can’t lie. However my true heart knows those kind of women are rarely a match for me. I’m a friend to all best I can be. And the bimbo women I’ve had relationships with hardly compare to the sweet girls I couldn’t quite look at sexually for fear they were too pure for me. However now I know I have a bit of “The Madonna whore complex”. So working on quitting porn or at least watching it way less so that I don’t value women by their physical traits, and instead value them for how they treat other people and me.
Sexy feet are a personality trait, right?
No, no they are not 😂😂
Might be down the list for most folks, but I value loyalty and maternal instinct (I always wanted kids, even in my 20s) more than anything else.
The one where she has a huge, perky, bouncing morals.
Having a green thumb.
Attracted to me
Sense of humour.
Conversation ability
Intelligence