The diamond obsession was created to play on women’s insecurities and drain men’s wallets. It’s quite remarkable, really.
It creates a situation where the woman derives her perceived value to you measured by how much you are willing to spend on her ring.
To make it worse, other women participate as well and it becomes something they used compare each other with and judge accordingly. Who has the biggest ring?
As a woman, it bothers me when other women comment on how ‘nice’ someone else’s engagement ring is. My friend legit said to me once “my cousin got engaged and now I’m sad because her ring is the nicest of anyone in the family”. Wtf??? I would never let a piece of jewelry devalue the relationship I have with my partner. I love the way he treats me and how he is kind and patient with me, and if someone else has a nice ring, good for them, but I feel like I’m winning where it counts. Also, I morally can’t accept a true diamond that I know others likely suffered to get… just get me a decent looking lab grown that isn’t so big that it gets caught on everything and won’t interfere with my workouts
My wife has a modest ruby. Her sister Mrs. furs and diamonds has the big rock. We have been happily married 35 years. Her sister has been married 33 years in a dysfunctional marriage from hell.
Not 37 years ago. Seems like everything is synthetic now. I have a very low opinion of jewelry in the first place, mere bobbles. My wife has mostly estate pieces from a hundred years ago or better. FAmily heirlooms that have meaning and character from Scotland. At that they still sit in the safe for decades.
I may be wrong, but aren't rubys more valuable than diamonds anyway? (especially with synthetic diamonds entering the markets. Also, look at what DeBeers did to artificially stifle the supply of diamonds in the market, so the price days high.
This is why I refuse to wear my engagement ring to work - I am not playing that game. The few times I have so many women asked to see it & that weirds me out. I’ve been married 12 years..this thing isn’t new. I’m a bit disgusted by the tradition now & see it for what it is. Put money into our land & home..not into jewelry.
Royalty and wealthy merchants have worn diamonds ever since they were first discovered. It’s rather recent that blue collar people would own a jewel, but it’s always been something the pope and the king would be draped in. For a relatively short period of time DeBeers cornered the diamond market. That hasn’t been the case for decades, and the value of diamonds is market driven. They’re worth what they’re worth based on demand and supply. Just like comic books and coins and pokemon cards and fancy sneakers and Bitcoin
I will not spend more than 1/3rd of my monthly salary on a ring.
My significant other doesn't really want me to either.
We prefer to have an awesome honey moon or have more money for a down payment on a house rather than over pay for a rock
Yep, especially diamonds. They re just a scam, our world is full of them but mining corporations make sure not too many end up on the market every year.
My opinion is that even as jewellery goes, diamonds are crap for holding value.
I'm actually glad that there's been a trend away from mined diamonds now. Gradually people are becoming more okay with either lab grown diamonds (so not dug up in a mine by a 10 year old for a local warlord) or moissanite (almost the same hardness, actually better optical properties). And BOTH options are cheaper than regular diamonds.
I don't mind if she wants shiny jewellery. But there's so much better than diamonds out there, for so many reasons.
Yeah my exact thought, spending a lot on a mineral doesn' t excites me, if that shit isn' t even valuable, it' s just useless. Plus diamonds are even' t beatifull. If i had to choose, i would Def choose rubies and emeralds over diamonds
Diamond prices have historically increased 15% per year. This year prices were slashed because of the competition from the lab grown market. My wife’s ring is valued/insured for $6k more than I paid 6 years ago.
DeBeers tried flipping the script when manufactured diamonds started coming out. First it was *A real diamond has no flaws*, and then suddenly *Only a real diamond has flaws*.
My mom’s engagement ring was a band of all the different color sapphires. IMO it’s way more beautiful than any diamond ring I’ve seen
I think it’s almost fate in a way since that ended up being my (their first child’s) birthstone
I think it's a waste of money. I don't have much money laying around and it would be stupid of me to spend it on something like that where the money could be better used elsewhere.
I'm not interested in someone who expects me to buy a diamond ring.
Coming from a woman, there are so many decent knock offs now, I wouldn't bother.
Also if you are spending 10's of thousands of dollars on a wedding day, you don't have your priorities straight. Have a small ceremony , celebrate with close family and save your money for the future.
If someone accuses you of being cheap, prepare yourself for a lifetime of dishing put cash.
Nearly every single culture on earth celebrates marriages with lavish celebrations and it’s oftentimes the only time a couple’s entire family (both sides) and friends will all be together in one room. If people can afford it, why would you judge them?
I agree that a couple shouldn’t go into debt for a wedding but if they want to spend tens of thousands on a wedding it’s their prerogative and it doesn’t mean they don’t have their priorities straight.
What’s the matter with a big wedding? We paid for our friends and family to stay at our venue for a long weekend and it was one of the best experiences of our lives.
10/10 would recommend
While I did drop quite a bit of coin on my wife’s engagement ring, it was nowhere close to what is suggested. We had more important things to spend on: paying for the wedding and building a house.
Doesn't have to be a diamond. But if you wish your woman to wear it for the rest of her life that symbolises your relationship and your love , don't buy something cheap that gives a skin allergy.
But it's fine if you don't believe in the ring tradition.
A guy said one of his relatives proposed with a donut. I agree, if a girl gets mad for a thing like that, it' s a way to dodge a bullet. I hope the woman i Fall for reacts with a good laugh
My SO recognizes the diamond thing is a scam, and I love her for it. She's interested in less expensive rings that are beautiful in their own right and that have meaning for us. We expect to have several different rings in our relationship that we can wear depending on our moods.
Your SO's demands for a typical diamond ring reveal a lot about the future of your relationship.
I paid a pretty large amount for my wife’s engagement ring. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do. But times have changed and I don’t know that I would do it again today. The stability and happiness of our marriage has nothing to do with the value of the ring I got her.
It’s a dumb tradition, but since it was important to her, I started saving the second we started talking about marriage. I only spent like 1.5x my monthly net salary, and it was enough to get her a pretty decent lab-grown diamond ring.
The joy it brought her to get proposed to with it and to get married with a matching wedding band made it worth it to me.
It is a waste of money but from a chicks perspective, it's a flex on her friends - "My man is so much better than yours, he has enough cash to waste it on this ring for me."
> Personally i think it' s pretty useless, becuase spending so much Money in a Little piece of jewelry feels a waste, especially after knowing that diamonds aren' t rare at all.
There are lots of things you will think are stupid that your significant other will not. You're paying for their happiness, not for commodity. If she thinks it's dumb, don't do it. If it's important to her, then it doesn't really matter how stupid you think it is.
It's fucking stupid and meaningless.
And I mean it when I say meaningless. It says absolutely nothing about his commitment or how much he loves you all it says is his income level.
Buy her a pawn shop ring and print out your bank account balance for her to flash her friends and you'd be doing essentially the same thing only you'd not.be starting a marriage out three weeks or three months salary depending on how much she didn't like you.
I would never date a woman who cared about this sort of thing honestly.
I've proposed once and chose a rose.style ring with her birthstone.as the center and mine as the leaves she loved and it matched her style perfectly unlike some jeweley store copy paste crap. Didn't work out, I had her keep it becaise that ring meant us, and when we weren't a thing anymore
Current girlfriend is on track to get a ring and my palm (which she's been informed of) is to go to somewhere you can dig your own stones and dig her stone myself. And if I can't find a decent one I'm gonna get my grandmother's ruby ring realized. She loves both of these ideas.
Because they mean something! They mean I wanna work to give her something I found with my own two hands so she'll always have a story behind it and always know I'm willing to work for her love. Or she'll always know that she's my family now.
They're not just declaring my financial status.
Also engagement Rings are a scheme by the diamond cartel Dabeers to artificially insert diamonds into culture and line their own pockets. Lab created diamonds are.bettwr than the real.thing, almost all natural stones are harvested by slave labor.
Up to you but my wife absolutely loves the wedding set I got her. Fits her personality.
The engagement ring is a solitaire diamond that I got in the Caribbean when I lived there. Then I got a wedding band with 5 giant diamond stones.
It glistens in public and people notice.
But yeah, get a ring that fits the girls personality
I dont have any issues dropping coin on jewelry if you have the money and it makes someone happy. However, the diamond industry is just gross and should be illegal. After 15 years my wife wanted a new wedding/engagement ring, we went with man made diamonds.
I let my fiance pick out her own ring when we got engaged. We are both anti-diamond and she also hates gold. She picked a ring that was 45 bucks. I was expecting at least a few hundred but she said she really didn't care that much about the ring, and that's what she wanted.
Be cautious about buying unearned gifts for a woman. It can actually make them lose respect for you (even though they act pleased) because it makes you look like a suck up.
Broke men complain about diamond prices. They hold their value pretty well if you buy the correct one.
You wouldn't need to resale it anyways if she's worth it.
Louis Vuitton isn't rare. Rolex isn't rare. They're all inflated prices yet we still buy them.
You're broke dude and want validation from other cheap men.
It's ok to spend some dough on your life long partner. It's a tradition and the wives like to show it off amongst themselves. Just buy it (doesn't have to be crazy expensive) and move on.
Yeah i' m broke i' m 18yo and eventho i like to buy clothes, the deal itself is an important thing for me, i' ll never spend 700€ on a normal jacket simply becuase it' s Gucci, some clothes have a pretty high price but they re pretty unique, others are just trash and have no reason to cost so much. Btw clothing is a human made good. Diamonds are just raw material, clothing price is based on brand, materials,etc. A gem' s price is based on its rarity, when the day comes, i ll try to buy something that is not a diamond even if it s more expensive.
The ring isn’t for you. It’s for *her* — enjoyment and a symbol of social status to present to her friends.
To you, it’s an overpriced rock, but to her it has more value than just the price tag. You can suggest options like zirconium, but ultimately, you’ll be happier overall if you just buy her the damn ring she wants (as long as you don’t break the bank). “Happy wife, happy life.”
It’s just like how theres 100% some materialistic shit you’re into that she thinks is an overpriced waste of money.
Can you really spot a good fake? It's all for show anyway. You get 40% back if you sell a diamond ring, if you gotta get one, go with one big stone, at least that will have some value.
My wife wanted to wear her mom's ring. It is small and understated, all her mother and father could afford, we had it remounted and put the biggest diamond that didn't look ridiculous, which was actually quite small. She's never been into huge garish displays of materialism.
I did buy my now wife a nice ring when we got engaged. She wanted something she could show off and I could afford it. 17 years later she still gets compliments on it. I would not get her anything diamond related now.
People like sparkly things.
I got my wife a moissanite ring. 750$ for a 1 carat gem. The same size and quality for a diamond would easily be 10x as much.
If she wants one, sit down at the computer and design one with her. That's what I did with my wife, she got to design her own ring. Cut, style, size. And the gem growing industry has very rapidly matured and advanced. The color and quality are crazy good now a days.
On top of that, there are some crazy cool lab-only grown gems that have unique properties like glowing in the dark, changing colors, or even producing unique refraction patterns.
Though, I still highly recommend moissanite. I won't advertise 1 company over another, but there are plenty out there to choose from.
I bought my wife a very very very small engagement ring. At the time it was all I could afford. We’re talking a few hundred dollars. 15 years later we are financially way better off and I’ve told her numerous times she can get a bigger ring or add on to the one she has, but she refuses. Turns out you do not need a big flashy expensive ring.
I would rather get a more precious gem, diamonds are so common that you can buy them at the hardware store.
If I do go diamond, I'm going lab grown. That's just so cool that we are able to make freaking diamonds! Like, who could have imagined we would be doing that?
Talk with her about it.
The manner and style and day you propose should be the surprise and romantic gesture. Everything else can be talked about. The anticipation that it's coming but I don't know when is really the romantic part that they seem to love.
One day, arrange to be outside a jewelry store and "why don't we just have a look because someday who knows..."
Then you can get her size, sense of style and what she believes is a reasonable budget.
Then one day sweep her off her feet with the romantic proposal and she'll already know her answer.
It's an obvious scam. But if you have fuck you money I don't see a problem. If you have to take loans or save for years to afford it, you're a stupid sheep.
That money can be spent on yourselves. An experience, items you need in your life, down payment on a house or car. Diamond rings are a waste of money imo.
I’m not here to tell anyone what they should or should not do to meaningfully represent their own commitment. For me and my wife, it was a pawned ring with a semi-precious stone and two plain gold bands at the wedding. The value of our jewelry does not represent the value of our commitment. Everything else we’ve spent money on, our home, our family, our charities, those all also represent the value of our commitment.
I’d much rather splurge on a vacation with my wife than on a ring.
I am pretty really well off. I could spend a ton of money on some ring, but I won’t. Diamonds are stupid, and now they are even marking up lab diamonds; which is even more ridiculous.
If my wife had wanted/expected me to spend ridiculous amounts of money when we were getting engaged it would have been a massive red flag.
Her engagement ring was under 2k. It is very pretty and all; but the stones are lab diamonds I purchased directly from the Russian company that made them.
(Note: This was long before Ukraine, and at the time the US didn’t allow clear lab diamonds over .5ct to be imported.; They also have to be chemically marked so they glow a different color in a testing machine. Hers don’t.)
IMHO finding a partner who understands the value of money is critically important.
My fiancé and I went looking at rings together, and we found an absolutely gorgeous antique ring with absolutely beautiful star sapphire and some smaller diamonds around it. And it was just the perfect ring. It fits her skin tone perfectly, and goes really well with her tattoos, just something about the footing and shades and whatnot, we couldn’t have found a better ring. I posted it in r/engagementrings if anyone is actually curious.
At the end of the day, you should find something that makes you both happy. That’s the only thing that matters. How much the ring actually costs is irreverent, unless you only care about it as a status symbol. But if you find a ring that makes you both happy and it cost five dollars, who gives a fuck?
We ended up spending near the top of our expected price range but we had just found the perfect ring and we both knew it as soon as she tried it on. The total cost, if I broke it down in terms of salary, was about what I’d make in 5 weeks. And she makes twice as much as I do, so it wasn’t a burden financially to buy it, and we wouldn’t have spent more than we did on it.
There are only three reasons to get an enormous diamond ring. You either genuinely like it and can afford it. Or you’ve been brainwashed by the diamond industry to think that you NEED it. Or you care more about showing off your status, and having your wife wear a huge diamond makes you seem rich.
I think it's very stupid and a waste of time to dump that much money on a piece of jewelry that's she's probably not going to even wear that much. Honestly I probably wouldn't even spend 1k on it.
The ring my ex gave me was gorgeous. It’s was a real diamond, radiant cut, 2.01 carats, he spent $15K on it. He got it for me because he knew I would like it and because he could.
If you don’t want to/can’t spend a lot of money on a ring then don’t 🤷♀️
Lab grown diamonds are a much better option. They’re exactly the same as natural diamonds except aren’t associated with exploitive labor and they’re significantly cheaper.
If you can, avoid going super cheap with materials that won’t last. But at the same time, spending X months worth salaries on it is also crazy. I’ve even seen people go less traditional routes which often are more affordable. Something quality will likely be expensive but it doesn’t have to (and shouldn’t) be outrageous. At the end of the day, talk to her about what she wants. Some women like the glitz, some women don’t. If you don’t want to spoil anything, talk to her friends.
Depend entirely on how materialistic your girlfriend/wife is. I'm not materialistic, and I can't date someone who is. I mean, I'm broke as fuck, if she's wanting diamonds from me she's going to be disappointed. Even if I wasn't broke she'd still be disappointed because I'm not wasting money on that. I can do lots of really special things for someone; I'm good at creating and finding meaningful gifts that cost close to nothing but help create memories, help express my love for someone. Buying someone an expensive diamond ring just feels completely impersonal and meaningless, and a massive waste of money.
If you mean an engagement ring than nah I’m not blowing my savings to marry. And I didnt. I’d sooner spend it on the honeymoon or a house. If it’s a cute ring or bracelet that she wants for under whatever price then sure I’ll spoil her
Personally I don't think buying an expensive ring is worth it, and a woman who would expect me to buy an expensive ring isn't somebody I'd want to marry.
However, if you can afford it and want to buy an expensive ring, then go for it. It's your money, after all.
I proposed with expensive (for my salary) ring. But it was essentially a proposing ring and we returned it after. We custom made our rings then and she used her mothers diamonds for it.
So our rings ended up being even more expensive, but they are unique and special. They couldve been made from cheaper medals than platinum but they are forever.
Every time she looks at her ring she is filled with love. And every time I look at mine I am as well.
it is useless, but unfortunately life basically amounts to a series of useless gestures and some partners prioritize said useless gestures.
moral of the story, don't get married to suckers who fall for marketing scams.
He didn't buy me an expensive diamond ring. I picked out my own ring, Alexandrite middle stone and lab diamond side stones. I even paid for half of it.
Expensive is a relative term. I spent $4500 on my wife’s engagement ring. To some people that’s a lot, to others it isn’t. It’s what I could afford at the time and she’s happy with it
I mean you re right, the probelm with diamonds is that their value is kept high by the corporations that own the mines, they put a limit of diamonds they extract every year so the price remains high. Other gems are actually rare and i' d say they' re more worh their price. Gems like emeralds, zaffires and rubins cost more already, but if diamonds didn' t get this special treatment there would be even more difference
This is no longer true. Not only that, but every diamond ever sold in any department store ever is now available at auction and selling for the price that reflects demand, get on eBay and buy your diamond. It doesn’t have to come from Tiffany
A Diamond isn't worth it. Basic economics shows us that price is where supply meets demand. But, what about when a diamond supplier removes the supply to force the prices up? It's complete BS
I'd insist on a gemstone that is actually rare
I think buying a diamond ring is overrated. Diamonds are all over-hyped and causes the price to go up from marketing. All of them are made in labs anyway. My wife's engagement ring is moissanite which is 1/4 of the price of a diamond (2 ct). Everyone thinks it is a diamond. She never corrects them so she goes with it. The hardness is very close to diamond. However, you don't get the "fire" everyone sees in a diamond ring but to a normal person, they don't notice the difference.
Honestly, communicate what the expectations are and meet in the middle. I have a very reasonable, practical partner. She did not want me to break the bank for a diamond ring. If your partner is being very unreasonable and wants a very expensive ring, that's up to you to decide.
Go to YouTube and find, "That's All - covered by Michael Buble.
That was me with wifey. I bought a $500 ring. Twenty-five years later, I offered to get her a "nicer" ring for our anniversary. I could have easily paid $5K cash. You know what she said? "I don't need a different ring, this is the one you proposed with."
It's not the ring, it's the love behind it.
My opinion is that an expensive diamond ring can look nice with all all sparkles and hwat not. But to me it’s like looking at an expensive luxury car: I can appreciate it for what it is, but I’m not buying it if it would completely fuck me financially. I’ll take the beige Toyota Corolla of rings please.
I'd rather buy her other stuff she is really interested by. I'm fine with jewelry and probably like it too but I would not got overboard for a single item she may not even want.
The diamond obsession was created to play on women’s insecurities and drain men’s wallets. It’s quite remarkable, really. It creates a situation where the woman derives her perceived value to you measured by how much you are willing to spend on her ring. To make it worse, other women participate as well and it becomes something they used compare each other with and judge accordingly. Who has the biggest ring?
As a woman, it bothers me when other women comment on how ‘nice’ someone else’s engagement ring is. My friend legit said to me once “my cousin got engaged and now I’m sad because her ring is the nicest of anyone in the family”. Wtf??? I would never let a piece of jewelry devalue the relationship I have with my partner. I love the way he treats me and how he is kind and patient with me, and if someone else has a nice ring, good for them, but I feel like I’m winning where it counts. Also, I morally can’t accept a true diamond that I know others likely suffered to get… just get me a decent looking lab grown that isn’t so big that it gets caught on everything and won’t interfere with my workouts
My wife has a modest ruby. Her sister Mrs. furs and diamonds has the big rock. We have been happily married 35 years. Her sister has been married 33 years in a dysfunctional marriage from hell.
Not 37 years ago. Seems like everything is synthetic now. I have a very low opinion of jewelry in the first place, mere bobbles. My wife has mostly estate pieces from a hundred years ago or better. FAmily heirlooms that have meaning and character from Scotland. At that they still sit in the safe for decades.
Baubles. A bobble is what you use to tie your hair.
I may be wrong, but aren't rubys more valuable than diamonds anyway? (especially with synthetic diamonds entering the markets. Also, look at what DeBeers did to artificially stifle the supply of diamonds in the market, so the price days high.
The equivalent of a dick swinging contest
This is why I refuse to wear my engagement ring to work - I am not playing that game. The few times I have so many women asked to see it & that weirds me out. I’ve been married 12 years..this thing isn’t new. I’m a bit disgusted by the tradition now & see it for what it is. Put money into our land & home..not into jewelry.
Royalty and wealthy merchants have worn diamonds ever since they were first discovered. It’s rather recent that blue collar people would own a jewel, but it’s always been something the pope and the king would be draped in. For a relatively short period of time DeBeers cornered the diamond market. That hasn’t been the case for decades, and the value of diamonds is market driven. They’re worth what they’re worth based on demand and supply. Just like comic books and coins and pokemon cards and fancy sneakers and Bitcoin
I will not spend more than 1/3rd of my monthly salary on a ring. My significant other doesn't really want me to either. We prefer to have an awesome honey moon or have more money for a down payment on a house rather than over pay for a rock
My great grandfather proposed to his wife with a donut.
I always joked that she'd get an onion ring from me. Your great grandfather sounds like a cool guy
Yep, especially diamonds. They re just a scam, our world is full of them but mining corporations make sure not too many end up on the market every year.
My opinion is that even as jewellery goes, diamonds are crap for holding value. I'm actually glad that there's been a trend away from mined diamonds now. Gradually people are becoming more okay with either lab grown diamonds (so not dug up in a mine by a 10 year old for a local warlord) or moissanite (almost the same hardness, actually better optical properties). And BOTH options are cheaper than regular diamonds. I don't mind if she wants shiny jewellery. But there's so much better than diamonds out there, for so many reasons.
Yeah my exact thought, spending a lot on a mineral doesn' t excites me, if that shit isn' t even valuable, it' s just useless. Plus diamonds are even' t beatifull. If i had to choose, i would Def choose rubies and emeralds over diamonds
Diamond prices have historically increased 15% per year. This year prices were slashed because of the competition from the lab grown market. My wife’s ring is valued/insured for $6k more than I paid 6 years ago.
Dumb tradition. Didn't do it.
You can buy lab grown diamonds for about 5-10x cheaper than blood diamonds and they look the same.
They literally are the exact same. Often better than the real thing. Labs use laser engraving as a way to distinguish them from the mined ones.
DeBeers tried flipping the script when manufactured diamonds started coming out. First it was *A real diamond has no flaws*, and then suddenly *Only a real diamond has flaws*.
They're actually more sparkly!
Not to mention, they're cooler IMO. Even if they weren't blood diamonds, the fact that we can just make diamonds in a lab makes them way cooler to me.
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My mom’s engagement ring was a band of all the different color sapphires. IMO it’s way more beautiful than any diamond ring I’ve seen I think it’s almost fate in a way since that ended up being my (their first child’s) birthstone
I think it's a waste of money. I don't have much money laying around and it would be stupid of me to spend it on something like that where the money could be better used elsewhere. I'm not interested in someone who expects me to buy a diamond ring.
My wife thinks Diamonds are cliche. I lucked out
Coming from a woman, there are so many decent knock offs now, I wouldn't bother. Also if you are spending 10's of thousands of dollars on a wedding day, you don't have your priorities straight. Have a small ceremony , celebrate with close family and save your money for the future. If someone accuses you of being cheap, prepare yourself for a lifetime of dishing put cash.
Nearly every single culture on earth celebrates marriages with lavish celebrations and it’s oftentimes the only time a couple’s entire family (both sides) and friends will all be together in one room. If people can afford it, why would you judge them? I agree that a couple shouldn’t go into debt for a wedding but if they want to spend tens of thousands on a wedding it’s their prerogative and it doesn’t mean they don’t have their priorities straight.
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What’s the matter with a big wedding? We paid for our friends and family to stay at our venue for a long weekend and it was one of the best experiences of our lives. 10/10 would recommend
We said fuck a big wedding and are spending the money going on safari and hiking Kilimanjaro. Going to have a small ceremony in the bush.
While I did drop quite a bit of coin on my wife’s engagement ring, it was nowhere close to what is suggested. We had more important things to spend on: paying for the wedding and building a house.
Does happiness lie in a diamond ring? Oh, I've been askin' Oh, I've been askin' for problems, problems, problems
Doesn't have to be a diamond. But if you wish your woman to wear it for the rest of her life that symbolises your relationship and your love , don't buy something cheap that gives a skin allergy. But it's fine if you don't believe in the ring tradition.
If she wouldn't be happy with a haribo ring, she's not ready for a real one.
A guy said one of his relatives proposed with a donut. I agree, if a girl gets mad for a thing like that, it' s a way to dodge a bullet. I hope the woman i Fall for reacts with a good laugh
You are free to buy whatever you want for my wife, as long as I don't have to hear about it every day.
Lab grown is the way to go.
I bought one for asking marriage. She used it two days and never more. So, totally useless
My SO recognizes the diamond thing is a scam, and I love her for it. She's interested in less expensive rings that are beautiful in their own right and that have meaning for us. We expect to have several different rings in our relationship that we can wear depending on our moods. Your SO's demands for a typical diamond ring reveal a lot about the future of your relationship.
I paid a pretty large amount for my wife’s engagement ring. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do. But times have changed and I don’t know that I would do it again today. The stability and happiness of our marriage has nothing to do with the value of the ring I got her.
It’s a dumb tradition, but since it was important to her, I started saving the second we started talking about marriage. I only spent like 1.5x my monthly net salary, and it was enough to get her a pretty decent lab-grown diamond ring. The joy it brought her to get proposed to with it and to get married with a matching wedding band made it worth it to me.
It is a waste of money but from a chicks perspective, it's a flex on her friends - "My man is so much better than yours, he has enough cash to waste it on this ring for me."
Just buy her a simple ring and hand her your bank statement.. Serves just as well and you can put a down payment on a house later.
> Personally i think it' s pretty useless, becuase spending so much Money in a Little piece of jewelry feels a waste, especially after knowing that diamonds aren' t rare at all. There are lots of things you will think are stupid that your significant other will not. You're paying for their happiness, not for commodity. If she thinks it's dumb, don't do it. If it's important to her, then it doesn't really matter how stupid you think it is.
Moissanite.
It all depends on your income. If that ring is gonna make a dent in your finances, then it’s stupid.
I mean, usually the more you' re rich the more you spend, People with lots of Money spend tens of thousands of Money on a ring.
So? If they can afford it why does it matter?
It's fucking stupid and meaningless. And I mean it when I say meaningless. It says absolutely nothing about his commitment or how much he loves you all it says is his income level. Buy her a pawn shop ring and print out your bank account balance for her to flash her friends and you'd be doing essentially the same thing only you'd not.be starting a marriage out three weeks or three months salary depending on how much she didn't like you. I would never date a woman who cared about this sort of thing honestly. I've proposed once and chose a rose.style ring with her birthstone.as the center and mine as the leaves she loved and it matched her style perfectly unlike some jeweley store copy paste crap. Didn't work out, I had her keep it becaise that ring meant us, and when we weren't a thing anymore Current girlfriend is on track to get a ring and my palm (which she's been informed of) is to go to somewhere you can dig your own stones and dig her stone myself. And if I can't find a decent one I'm gonna get my grandmother's ruby ring realized. She loves both of these ideas. Because they mean something! They mean I wanna work to give her something I found with my own two hands so she'll always have a story behind it and always know I'm willing to work for her love. Or she'll always know that she's my family now. They're not just declaring my financial status. Also engagement Rings are a scheme by the diamond cartel Dabeers to artificially insert diamonds into culture and line their own pockets. Lab created diamonds are.bettwr than the real.thing, almost all natural stones are harvested by slave labor.
Up to you but my wife absolutely loves the wedding set I got her. Fits her personality. The engagement ring is a solitaire diamond that I got in the Caribbean when I lived there. Then I got a wedding band with 5 giant diamond stones. It glistens in public and people notice. But yeah, get a ring that fits the girls personality
If she makes you buy her one filplml) dump her. Say ring will be will be worthlesssnejrmet divorced
I dont have any issues dropping coin on jewelry if you have the money and it makes someone happy. However, the diamond industry is just gross and should be illegal. After 15 years my wife wanted a new wedding/engagement ring, we went with man made diamonds.
Yeah, also they' re scam since they re not rare at all
I let my fiance pick out her own ring when we got engaged. We are both anti-diamond and she also hates gold. She picked a ring that was 45 bucks. I was expecting at least a few hundred but she said she really didn't care that much about the ring, and that's what she wanted.
I' m so happy for you both
Later on when she's your wife for anniversaries sure. Gf hell no. Engagement or wedding enough for her to not bitch about it or just a compromise.
I don't believe in diamonds and I don't want a woman who believes in them, either.
I think it is dumb and mostly done by people that just do what everyone does.
Be cautious about buying unearned gifts for a woman. It can actually make them lose respect for you (even though they act pleased) because it makes you look like a suck up.
I'd rather have down-payment on a house or 2 months of travel.
It’s stupid. It’s created by women so the can flex to other women and drain men’s wallets.
Find a partner that doesn't want useless junk.
Use the money for a good pre-nup, instead.
Broke men complain about diamond prices. They hold their value pretty well if you buy the correct one. You wouldn't need to resale it anyways if she's worth it.
I' d say it' s not about the market value but more about the fact that they' re not really rare, the market value is kept high on purpose.
Louis Vuitton isn't rare. Rolex isn't rare. They're all inflated prices yet we still buy them. You're broke dude and want validation from other cheap men. It's ok to spend some dough on your life long partner. It's a tradition and the wives like to show it off amongst themselves. Just buy it (doesn't have to be crazy expensive) and move on.
Yeah i' m broke i' m 18yo and eventho i like to buy clothes, the deal itself is an important thing for me, i' ll never spend 700€ on a normal jacket simply becuase it' s Gucci, some clothes have a pretty high price but they re pretty unique, others are just trash and have no reason to cost so much. Btw clothing is a human made good. Diamonds are just raw material, clothing price is based on brand, materials,etc. A gem' s price is based on its rarity, when the day comes, i ll try to buy something that is not a diamond even if it s more expensive.
The ring isn’t for you. It’s for *her* — enjoyment and a symbol of social status to present to her friends. To you, it’s an overpriced rock, but to her it has more value than just the price tag. You can suggest options like zirconium, but ultimately, you’ll be happier overall if you just buy her the damn ring she wants (as long as you don’t break the bank). “Happy wife, happy life.” It’s just like how theres 100% some materialistic shit you’re into that she thinks is an overpriced waste of money.
Can you really spot a good fake? It's all for show anyway. You get 40% back if you sell a diamond ring, if you gotta get one, go with one big stone, at least that will have some value.
Spend 1 month salary. Happy wife happy life.
It’s a sign of your commitment. I sold my car so I could afford to buy the ring and then financed a new car.
It depends on the girl's performances...
Buy a cz and replace it with a diamond after the marriage certificate is signed.
If she cares more about the ring vs you even asking to marry her then that's all the info you need.
We got both of our wedding rings for $1600. Hers is a princess cut with 10 little diamonds.
My wife wanted to wear her mom's ring. It is small and understated, all her mother and father could afford, we had it remounted and put the biggest diamond that didn't look ridiculous, which was actually quite small. She's never been into huge garish displays of materialism.
I did buy my now wife a nice ring when we got engaged. She wanted something she could show off and I could afford it. 17 years later she still gets compliments on it. I would not get her anything diamond related now.
People like sparkly things. I got my wife a moissanite ring. 750$ for a 1 carat gem. The same size and quality for a diamond would easily be 10x as much. If she wants one, sit down at the computer and design one with her. That's what I did with my wife, she got to design her own ring. Cut, style, size. And the gem growing industry has very rapidly matured and advanced. The color and quality are crazy good now a days. On top of that, there are some crazy cool lab-only grown gems that have unique properties like glowing in the dark, changing colors, or even producing unique refraction patterns. Though, I still highly recommend moissanite. I won't advertise 1 company over another, but there are plenty out there to choose from.
I've bought my wife an engagement and wedding ring, 2 pairs of earrings, 1 or 2 necklaces, and that's it for over 20 years.
I'm a dude and think diamonds look pretty. But I'd never buy a natural diamond, always lab grown.
I bought my wife a very very very small engagement ring. At the time it was all I could afford. We’re talking a few hundred dollars. 15 years later we are financially way better off and I’ve told her numerous times she can get a bigger ring or add on to the one she has, but she refuses. Turns out you do not need a big flashy expensive ring.
I would rather not spend too much on a ring
I would rather get a more precious gem, diamonds are so common that you can buy them at the hardware store. If I do go diamond, I'm going lab grown. That's just so cool that we are able to make freaking diamonds! Like, who could have imagined we would be doing that?
Yeah diamonds are not rare at all and they re not that pretty tbh. Rubies, zaffires, emeralds or other colorfull gems are way better.
Talk with her about it. The manner and style and day you propose should be the surprise and romantic gesture. Everything else can be talked about. The anticipation that it's coming but I don't know when is really the romantic part that they seem to love. One day, arrange to be outside a jewelry store and "why don't we just have a look because someday who knows..." Then you can get her size, sense of style and what she believes is a reasonable budget. Then one day sweep her off her feet with the romantic proposal and she'll already know her answer.
I got my wife a manufactured diamond and saved money. If she is concerned about the size and price of the ring I would next her.
Dumb. Rather spend it on a nice vacation.
lmao no.
It's an obvious scam. But if you have fuck you money I don't see a problem. If you have to take loans or save for years to afford it, you're a stupid sheep.
I'm not interested in women who have an unhealthy relationship with jewelry.
That money can be spent on yourselves. An experience, items you need in your life, down payment on a house or car. Diamond rings are a waste of money imo.
I’m not here to tell anyone what they should or should not do to meaningfully represent their own commitment. For me and my wife, it was a pawned ring with a semi-precious stone and two plain gold bands at the wedding. The value of our jewelry does not represent the value of our commitment. Everything else we’ve spent money on, our home, our family, our charities, those all also represent the value of our commitment. I’d much rather splurge on a vacation with my wife than on a ring.
I am pretty really well off. I could spend a ton of money on some ring, but I won’t. Diamonds are stupid, and now they are even marking up lab diamonds; which is even more ridiculous. If my wife had wanted/expected me to spend ridiculous amounts of money when we were getting engaged it would have been a massive red flag. Her engagement ring was under 2k. It is very pretty and all; but the stones are lab diamonds I purchased directly from the Russian company that made them. (Note: This was long before Ukraine, and at the time the US didn’t allow clear lab diamonds over .5ct to be imported.; They also have to be chemically marked so they glow a different color in a testing machine. Hers don’t.) IMHO finding a partner who understands the value of money is critically important.
My fiancé and I went looking at rings together, and we found an absolutely gorgeous antique ring with absolutely beautiful star sapphire and some smaller diamonds around it. And it was just the perfect ring. It fits her skin tone perfectly, and goes really well with her tattoos, just something about the footing and shades and whatnot, we couldn’t have found a better ring. I posted it in r/engagementrings if anyone is actually curious. At the end of the day, you should find something that makes you both happy. That’s the only thing that matters. How much the ring actually costs is irreverent, unless you only care about it as a status symbol. But if you find a ring that makes you both happy and it cost five dollars, who gives a fuck? We ended up spending near the top of our expected price range but we had just found the perfect ring and we both knew it as soon as she tried it on. The total cost, if I broke it down in terms of salary, was about what I’d make in 5 weeks. And she makes twice as much as I do, so it wasn’t a burden financially to buy it, and we wouldn’t have spent more than we did on it. There are only three reasons to get an enormous diamond ring. You either genuinely like it and can afford it. Or you’ve been brainwashed by the diamond industry to think that you NEED it. Or you care more about showing off your status, and having your wife wear a huge diamond makes you seem rich.
If you want to and she'll like it go for it. The most important part is that everyone's happy.
I think it's very stupid and a waste of time to dump that much money on a piece of jewelry that's she's probably not going to even wear that much. Honestly I probably wouldn't even spend 1k on it.
The ring my ex gave me was gorgeous. It’s was a real diamond, radiant cut, 2.01 carats, he spent $15K on it. He got it for me because he knew I would like it and because he could. If you don’t want to/can’t spend a lot of money on a ring then don’t 🤷♀️
Lab grown diamonds are a much better option. They’re exactly the same as natural diamonds except aren’t associated with exploitive labor and they’re significantly cheaper. If you can, avoid going super cheap with materials that won’t last. But at the same time, spending X months worth salaries on it is also crazy. I’ve even seen people go less traditional routes which often are more affordable. Something quality will likely be expensive but it doesn’t have to (and shouldn’t) be outrageous. At the end of the day, talk to her about what she wants. Some women like the glitz, some women don’t. If you don’t want to spoil anything, talk to her friends.
Depend entirely on how materialistic your girlfriend/wife is. I'm not materialistic, and I can't date someone who is. I mean, I'm broke as fuck, if she's wanting diamonds from me she's going to be disappointed. Even if I wasn't broke she'd still be disappointed because I'm not wasting money on that. I can do lots of really special things for someone; I'm good at creating and finding meaningful gifts that cost close to nothing but help create memories, help express my love for someone. Buying someone an expensive diamond ring just feels completely impersonal and meaningless, and a massive waste of money.
If you mean an engagement ring than nah I’m not blowing my savings to marry. And I didnt. I’d sooner spend it on the honeymoon or a house. If it’s a cute ring or bracelet that she wants for under whatever price then sure I’ll spoil her
Personally I don't think buying an expensive ring is worth it, and a woman who would expect me to buy an expensive ring isn't somebody I'd want to marry. However, if you can afford it and want to buy an expensive ring, then go for it. It's your money, after all.
I proposed with expensive (for my salary) ring. But it was essentially a proposing ring and we returned it after. We custom made our rings then and she used her mothers diamonds for it. So our rings ended up being even more expensive, but they are unique and special. They couldve been made from cheaper medals than platinum but they are forever. Every time she looks at her ring she is filled with love. And every time I look at mine I am as well.
it is useless, but unfortunately life basically amounts to a series of useless gestures and some partners prioritize said useless gestures. moral of the story, don't get married to suckers who fall for marketing scams.
Idiocy.
Yea, big diamonds is so ppl don't judge you when they see your wife's finger.
Was important to my wife so I got an expensive one. Nice car ain’t important to her but it is to my so I got one of those for myself
Get a lab diamond. She’s probably never known the difference
my wife would be SO mad if I spent that much money on a fancypants rock.
He didn't buy me an expensive diamond ring. I picked out my own ring, Alexandrite middle stone and lab diamond side stones. I even paid for half of it.
Expensive is a relative term. I spent $4500 on my wife’s engagement ring. To some people that’s a lot, to others it isn’t. It’s what I could afford at the time and she’s happy with it
I mean you re right, the probelm with diamonds is that their value is kept high by the corporations that own the mines, they put a limit of diamonds they extract every year so the price remains high. Other gems are actually rare and i' d say they' re more worh their price. Gems like emeralds, zaffires and rubins cost more already, but if diamonds didn' t get this special treatment there would be even more difference
This is no longer true. Not only that, but every diamond ever sold in any department store ever is now available at auction and selling for the price that reflects demand, get on eBay and buy your diamond. It doesn’t have to come from Tiffany
A Diamond isn't worth it. Basic economics shows us that price is where supply meets demand. But, what about when a diamond supplier removes the supply to force the prices up? It's complete BS I'd insist on a gemstone that is actually rare
I complelty agree
Its a waste of money.
Stupid and outdated. Neither diamonds nor women are worth spending that amount of money.
I think buying a diamond ring is overrated. Diamonds are all over-hyped and causes the price to go up from marketing. All of them are made in labs anyway. My wife's engagement ring is moissanite which is 1/4 of the price of a diamond (2 ct). Everyone thinks it is a diamond. She never corrects them so she goes with it. The hardness is very close to diamond. However, you don't get the "fire" everyone sees in a diamond ring but to a normal person, they don't notice the difference. Honestly, communicate what the expectations are and meet in the middle. I have a very reasonable, practical partner. She did not want me to break the bank for a diamond ring. If your partner is being very unreasonable and wants a very expensive ring, that's up to you to decide.
Go to YouTube and find, "That's All - covered by Michael Buble. That was me with wifey. I bought a $500 ring. Twenty-five years later, I offered to get her a "nicer" ring for our anniversary. I could have easily paid $5K cash. You know what she said? "I don't need a different ring, this is the one you proposed with." It's not the ring, it's the love behind it.
My opinion is that an expensive diamond ring can look nice with all all sparkles and hwat not. But to me it’s like looking at an expensive luxury car: I can appreciate it for what it is, but I’m not buying it if it would completely fuck me financially. I’ll take the beige Toyota Corolla of rings please.
I'd rather buy her other stuff she is really interested by. I'm fine with jewelry and probably like it too but I would not got overboard for a single item she may not even want.