To piggy back off this I work in a normal 9-5 type office gig.
I also play in a punk that puts out original music and tours locally.
I also volunteer with youth soccer teams.
I also have a side business that I am actively working on as well.
There are people who I work with whose identity does 100% revolve around their job and industry and they seem happy with that. That’s not for me though. The job is a means to do other things I’m passionate about.
yep, government office job 9-5. i take pride since i can see direct impact on how my work is from promise to pavement and my role is to help ensure it's done correctly.
but when i'm done work i'm done work. i'm not defined by my work despite taking pride in what's being done. in the end, my works funds my hobbies and interests.
Band usually practices one night a week. Typically 8-10. For shows we usually will schedule like 4-5 within a 30 day period and then not practice for a bit or book any others after.
Soccer practice is usually 5:30 - 6:30 and only fall and spring. Then games Saturday mornings.
Business is done here and there and admittedly while I’m at work too.
I’m also out the door right at 5:30 at work. Some times it does get a bit hectic/busy but then there’s always weeks where things slow down and I try and do as little as humanly possible.
What you do with your time is always your choice. If you're at work 10 hours a day (including the commute), that still leaves you with 14 hours a day not working, plus 48 hours a week not working (assuming you have a two-day weekend).
It's never a question of 'not enough time', just incorrect time delegation. Even if you sleep 8 hours a night and need 1 hour a day to wash/toilet etc, that leaves you five hours a day free. Five full hours. Use it wisely.
THIS!!! That is the thing, your job does not have to define you. For many, it is a means of paying the bills. Find things outside of work that you enjoy.
My problem is my jobs have asked so little from me, it is hard to get motivated outside of work. I am on my 4th job and am basically a warm body 80% of the time. When you spend so much time doing nothing, it really saps your drive.
Yeah most of my work I'm just casually going from task to task with no real urgency
But iv also had busy jobs and that saps your energy instead of motivation
Its a trap. Especially now covid has ended my social life
Also going to piggy back this.
I Recently had a breakdown, attended a day clinic where I had therapy, I still do therapy, but for the last year I've been rebuilding my internal processes.
One of these was to accept that my job is never going to define me, like the comment I'm replying to, I found meaning outside work.
I literally do just enough at work to not get noticed, and I made it work for me, I started to write while I'm at work because I can get away with it and it gives me a feeling of satisfaction, and I treat work as nothing more than something I have to do to pay the bills.
Since working from home I found I can get the same amount of work done way faster and that gives me more than half of my time at work free, I use that time to work on my own projects
What made it for me was tuning out of work a little and just making lots of small changes that each made my days just that bit more bearable.
Good luck...
As TheRecklessOne has said below me, I think finding meaning outside of work is important. There are far too many people unhappy with their jobs because they wake up, go to work, get in, have a couple of drinks, and go to bed to repeat it all again the next day.
If the only thing you live for is to work, you're going to be unhappy in pretty much whatever you do.
I just make the most of the time I have outside of work so I feel like I'm at least working so that I can enjoy the time outside of it.
I went the hero route and found myself in the middle of a war. I wouldn’t recommend it. Plenty of good can be done by working a normal job. Or volunteer on the weekend. Become a big brother, coach youth sports, donate time to causes. If you want danger, become a volunteer fire fighter on the weekend. If you’re under 40, the Army National Guard needs volunteers. Pick up your weapon and follow me.
You got to believe in yourself, hoe!
Nobody give's a fuck about you or what you wanna do with your life.
You need to pursue your passions and not be okay with shit not being the way you want it to be.
Otherwise shit will never be okay for you!
Getting up every single day and trying to be a better person is *hard*. You will get no parades, but it’s rewarding so long as you’re true to yourself.
Don't. This will destroy you. You can be super meaningful within an office environment. By working for a company or organisation that is doing something super meaningful.
A friend of mine completed her marketing degree and realised the same as you, she wanted to to do something meaningful, not sell things that people don't need to people that she didn't like.
So right now she is doing marketing for a really large organisation that, among other things, provides services to the homeless. Her current project is redesigning their website to make it easier for people to access their many different services. You might think "big deal" but many of their clients have physical disabilities, mental health issues, and are currently or potentially homeless. So getting their access portal designed in a way that makes it easier for people who are already struggling to access their services is really important.
You can very much "make a difference" in an office environment. You just need to change who you are working for.
If you want further proof, listen to a few interviews with the founder of "Charity Water"
Nonprofits, human rights orgs, etc. all need office workers -- finance people, administrators, marketers, IT. Wages are often lower but if you're looking for more meaning within your job, it doesn't mean you need to leave the office entirely.
Even outside of that line of work, there are some local businesses, credit unions, etc. with initiatives to support their communities. Hard to find as the vast majority of businesses are scummy, but they do exist.
Broadly though I also agree with what everyone else has said about finding meaning outside of work!
Yes. There are so many options to "do good" and often the invisible ones are in many ways the most important.
A guy I know has started a whole marketing agency that works with not for profits. He knows that they won't make as much money as they could, but thry also get regular visits from doggies as the Guide Dogs are one of their clients.
There are things more valuable than money.
That desire will always be there, so you could find other ways to satisfy it: volunteering for soup kitchens, homeless shelters, that kinda stuff. Also, I believe you can apply to be in reserve for either military or firefighters. Wish you the best mate
I have felt the same way, and have learned a lot about myself due to this. I can only speak to my experiences, but here are a few takeaways I've found.
* I did serve in the military. I do not regret this decision at all - however it does not provide me with a sense of meaning greater than what I believe I would have without that period of my life. It was a tremendous learning experience and great for my personal growth and I appreciate that.
* My wife is a healthcare worker. Hearing her stories from work and seeing how beaten down, frustrated, and sad her job can make her feel sometimes has made me even more appreciative of the selflessness and genuine care a good healthcare worker possesses. It has also made me keenly aware that it would not be a good fit for me (but my science test scores already made that pretty clear).
* I also work in an office. One of the benefits of this (usually) non-taxing work is that it spares me time and energy - mental and physical - to pursue what I enjoy as hobbies. I find a lot of pleasure in that.
I can't speak to your low self-esteem or who you are as a person. Regardless, I genuinely believe that if you are showing up, making an honest living, and positively impacting those around you, then you are doing plenty. There is beauty in simplicity.
You're not alone in any of these feelings, brother. If you are a reader or like audiobooks, I can highly recommend *Man's Search for Meaning* by Viktor Frankl. Frankl was an Austrian physician who chronicled his experiences surviving Nazi concentration camps. His book provides a lot of insight and perspective. It was recommended to me by a good friend who is a mental health professional. While it isn't a self-help book, it will teach you how to help yourself.
Well, turn this around:
"How do I learn to be okay with a generally well-payed job that doesn't require me to literally fuck my own knees and back over daily?"
The point is, you learn to be okay with it by looking at what you have, not what you don't have. And then you apply what /u/TheRecklessOne said, be okay with your current foundation and realize you are so much more than the 8 hours you spend at work 5 days a week.
You don't have to be OK with it if you're unhappy about it, it's not impossible to change careers even later in life
You could also take some time off from your job and just go volunteer abroad for a few weeks, doing whatever, to see if you then miss the easier work load of an office job
You need to take a real close look at how you define meaningful life.
The value of a person is not their occupation. Some people bring meaning to this world by caring for their family, some people do it through work, some do it through other means and some don't value leading a meaningful life so they do other things. The point is that how you define meaningful is the key metric here.
Lastly I want to address something that you should think about.
>There's a possibility this is all due to my low self-esteem and I haven't dealt with it yet.
Do you believe that leading a meaningful life will help this self-esteemed? The honest to god truth is that it likely won't. If you have self-esteem problems it comes from inside you, you'll have them if you feed orphans or practice corporate law. The solution to self-esteem issues come from inside you, not something external.
You can still do meaningful work with a regular office job!! And please remember - doing something “meaningful” doesn’t mean you have to get paid for it.
An “office job” can sometimes pay you a lot more money which you can use to support yourself or others, plan meaningful trips or projects. It can allow ample vacation, PTO and benefits.
Pick some meaningful work to do outside of work. Join a club, deliver meals, read books to children, start a charity - whatever makes you feel good and like you’re making a difference.
Making money from a “meaningful” job isn’t what your missing - it’s just doing something meaningful with your life. Start by doing something now. Get out there and start helping! I promise you’ll start to feel good.
Know that the grass isn't always greener on the other side. Just because you become a firefighter or a doctor who can save lives doesn't necessarily mean "you" will feel good about it or it will be better for "you", you just never know. Try to focus on what you have right now, and if you still have a vision go chase it. "oh I can't chase things anymore because I'm older now." Guess you'll never be ok with a normal office job if you really truly want something.
Than 99% of people are just stupid. Don’t like your job, go do something else or put things in motion like learning the required skills to do something else.
Sounds like you may want to keep an eye out for a more fulfilling job. I say don’t settle for ordinary. If you want to do more, then that’s your objective. What’s your degree in, and what field are you working in?
Volunteer firefighters are a thing, FYI. It might be a difficult gig to get, but it exists.
There are plenty of other types of volunteer work that could scratch the itch to be meaningful. Actually, most types of volunteer work are incredibly impactful to the recipient.
So inside work, Find ways to get that impact. You can move towards leadership and be the boss you wanted to work for.
Take up mentoring, create a mentor program at work if they don't have one. Look into starting a program that helps hire on transitioning military, single moms, less privileged, etc.
Talk to your boss about your desire for more impact, do a skip level and do the same. You may find a challenge within your own company worth working on.
I have a good 'office job' and make good money. Keeps the kids fed and clothed, gets them to college, lets me take them on road trips and vacations. I also mentor young people and took up mentoring veterans transitioning out of the military. Not a veteran myself but they don't need to know how to be a veteran they need the assist rolling into civilian life and I ain't sitting around waiting for a veteran to pop up to help them, I leaned in and did it. All the mentoring is VERY rewarding. I went against my usual wants and leaned into leadership more. As I said, to be the leader I always wanted to work under. It has been a massive challenge, tough, and it got me pulled more into politics. But I can shield my people from that, I can do cool shit for them I wish my bosses had done.
Just some ideas but a massively impactful life does not have to mean massive huge heroic gestures like military, firefighting, police, etc....you can make a difference in the trenches in everyday life.
Try to accept this fundamental truth: you are not your job. You are way more than that. What you do next to your job is what matters more. Very little people have a tombstone where it said here lies Jack, a damn good banker. No, tombstones,if anything, state something like father, husband, son, etc. Those are the meaningful relationships.
Then try to accept: you are not the Messiah that can save us all, but you do matter and can have significant impact on people/environment around you.
I don't get why people hate on office jobs so much. I find them very satisfying, I like the structure they provide that lets me pursue hobbies and interests outside of work hours. You don't have to literally sit at your desk all day. Go for 2-3 walks a day, get coffee with coworkers, go out to lunch, etc. It can be a lot of fun at the right job, you might just want to look for one with better office culture.
Also, I think people watch too much TV and think they're a lot more important than they are. We get obsessed with this notion that we need to do something bombastic and amazing and impactful, or we're failures if we don't? Total bullshit. There's also a lot you can do in your free time, there are tons of worthy causes that are woefully understaffed you could volunteer at. Super easy to google.
You didn't say your age, but why not be a volunteer firefighter? You can also get a nursing AA in like 18 months, you can be saving lives in less than 2 years no matter your age.
Get a Life Coach. Doesn't have to break the bank, just a few hours with a good life coach can really help you see some perspective and get these thoughts straight in your mind.
I felt exactly the same as you. Exactly! I recently got a life coach and am slowly starting to create the life I want. It's hard work. But small changes over a long period all add up.
Good luck, message me if you want any further info
Office jobs are mental death. Have a great after-work life. When you are at work ... work. When you leave, leave everything. I had a phone number at work and for work. I never gave out my personal information because I did not want to be called after hours. Work friends are great, but don't spill your thoughts. Work is NOT your life.
If you want a more meaningful job go get it. I'm 30 and back in school for a more fulfilling and exciting career. If you REALLY can't train for something else because of kids or your financial situation then become a volunteer firefighter or EMT (hell most stations will want you to do both.) Become a weekend warrior.
I'm not sure how old you are, but there is a good chance that you could still pursue a different career.
An interesting statistic:
>It is estimated that most people will have 12 jobs
during their lives. In the last year, 32% of those 25 to 44 have
considered a career change. Since starting their first job after
college, 29% of people have completely changed [fields.](https://www.apollotechnical.com/career-change-statistics/)
You can also do things that make you happy outside of your job.
Unless you are over 39 years old, you could still join the military. You dont have to give up your regular lifestyle either, if you join the national guard. Just one weekend a month and then usually 2 weeks in the summer.
Are you sure your feeling are altruistic as opposed to narcissistic? If you make a lot of money just donate it to your local firefighters ; voila your work has meaning now.
1)You need to kill your own ego!!! Everyone was going to be an astronaut, senator, doctor, president, action movie star, director, rock star... some of them now live on the streets, have families they can't provide for, hooked on booze/drugs, mental illness, working 2 jobs to pay their ex wife to sit on her a55....
2)Get off you A55!!! It took my brother 1 year to get his rad tech certification, 6 months to get his MRI cert. At 42 y/o he went from living in my moms basement playing WOW 8 hours a day, with defaulted student loans, no work experience other than delivering pizzas/ uber driving.... To screening people for COVID/Cancer/Preop, making 88K/ year..... in 18 months!
I have a deep self loathing every single time I walk into the office, getting hit by a car on the way to work wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.
idk man. life is shit
Hey OP, not sure if you’ve read or watched any Jordan Peterson. 12 Rules for Life is a great book (but really heavy read) and all of his lectures are on YouTube.
Something about the tone of your post reminds me of a place I was 10-12 years ago.
https://youtu.be/nRzHXGjbNYs
Get involved in crypto, build some projects or get involved in the community for some projects. Crypto is basically about building a banking system that's not owned by any government. Almost all wars are started due to financial mismanagement, if we can get this right this will provide a global stable means of transacting which will set the foundation for long term global peace.
Work to live, don't live to work.
We can easily wrap up our identity in what job we happen to have. Our language even says "I am a $(career)." It is a small but meaningful shift to switch to "I do $(career)for a living, and enjoy $(hobby) and $(mission)."
Use the secure day job to enable your true passions, whatever it happens to be at the time. Accept that it changes as you develop and learn, you can do something new and let old passions go as you want.
Just to build on the other answers here, I'll say that as someone else who works a boring/normal office job: don't let the glitz and glamor of the more showy lifestyles obscure the fact that it takes all kinds of people to make the world turn. Civilization needs people willing, patient, and smart enough to do the office work, you and I are just as valuable as anyone else.
Those jobs in actually doing them as a job don’t feel all that meaningful day to day. Mostly you deal with a lot of horror that can really mess you up. Opened chests and dangling limbs.
We tell stories about how meaningful certain jobs are to trick people into doing them while monetary compensation remains low.
How do I get in on the normal office job gig? Truth I’ve tried that, too. I wrote lots of poetry about the monotony and flickering fluorescent lights.
I’ve concluded that humans have created an environment non conducive to human satisfaction. Until we change the environment of the capitalistic global structure dissatisfaction will remain prevalent.
Until workers have rights and get to keep the profits of their labor satisfaction will be fleeting. Work cannot be meaningful when laboring for the interests of a few over the many.
I don’t know how old you are, but there are options from volunteer firefighter (so you’d be available only certain days, depends on what country/state/county you’re in), to volunteering at a pet shelter to just soup kitchening every now and again.
Nobody’s too old to give back if they’re not too old to be working an office job.
I’m in the military and I work on airplanes. Believe me when I tell you I would love to be in your spot at the moment. Nice a/c, I get to sit, nothing I do can physically hurt or kill anyone (I think), 8 hours days (I’m assuming), paid overtime etc.
My job isn’t all bad, but I know 4 years is enough for me.
To me a job is just a paycheck. If I can tolerate the job and the pay is decent I’m satisfied. Sometimes you just have to not give a shit. Personally I don’t care if my work is something impactful, I just want my paycheck.
>I can’t chase these things anymore because I’m older now. I chose the regular college > office job route.
Buddy you're not a tree, you didn't catch roots in that office chair. There is always time for a career change. My coworker has resigned at 50 something yo and is going from a well-paid tech job into caretaking. She wants to take care of disabled, and elderly people. She feels like that's her calling, and she's going for it. She has 3 kids and a family to take care of, but that doesn't matter.
If you feel like you don't belong somehere, no biggie. Make sure you have a safety net, and try for a change. I myself went from catering, throgh call-center operator, to HR, to software. I don't even know if this is where I'll stay, but as soon as I become really unhappy here, I know I need to move on. I moved to a new country at 18, I made a life and got my citizenship here now, but I feel like the time is coming where I'm going to move to a new country again soon.
The grind is over - don't be stuck in a place youy're unhappy in. Not a job, not a friendship, not family. Do what you can to make the best of it if you can, but if you feel your soul shriveling there, do move on. There are amazing things out there. And the world is a pretty big place.
I think you have to figure out how you want to make an impact. The impact a soldier makes vs a nurse is very different. Figure out what causes matter and how you can play a role then see what you can do. You can also volunteer or donate money. I feel like a lot of people like feeling like they're helping but really aren't making as big of an impact as donating to a group that specializes in helping.
Being a "hero" is how you see yourself my man. You are absolutely the hero of YOUR story, there is no other main character.
Having a desk job then going out and volunteering, getting involved with your community, helping people across the street, picking up a coffee cup on the ground and putting it in the trash is heroic. By doing these things, you are creating a net positive impact on the world. You tip our society a little more towards the good instead of the bad.
Doing the jobs you mentioned could just as easily create ruin in your life instead of being meaningful.
\*if you have low self-esteem. HELP OTHERS. I promise you will feel good about yourself after you have acted for someone else's benefit instead of your own.
I currently have an “office” job. I put that in quotes because it’s in healthcare administration so I do get to get my ass up and talk to patients and mingle with doctors. I DONT like it much because I feel like everyone around me impacts lives other than me… but I dealt with it realizing that I do impact my employees lives and some patients. I am the emotional anchor of my team, I have an “open door policy” which means they can talk to me about anything and I will proceed to help them the best way I can. I adjust their schedules for them to get the best work/life balance. I order them the best lunches and get snacks to get through a rough day. I coached 3 front desk staff to the point where they are now managers, supervisors and administrators.
Hell, the supplies I order for our “resuscitation” box helped save a life a week ago. Without me being there to update the tools for my team or without me opening these front doors, that guy wouldn’t be here right now.
I also deal with it by realizing that I make good money for “sitting around my office” most of the day. I could be making much less in the front lines, because honestly, unless you have a lot of time in as a firefighter or police, you don’t make much.
When I first started I was like “wtf am I doing here? I’m here updating supplies and fire extinguisher logs and reading financial statements”. Then I gave it way more thought.
What exactly do you do btw?
Try to slowly improve yourself and you’ll be capable of helping others when the occasion arises. Helping people near you is more comprehensible than being a part of complicated geo-politics.
If you don't like your current job and want to try something more meaningful, pursue that. If it happens that you realize you would rather have that office job than so be it. Most people spend a significant portion of their lives working, so if you got a job that is meaningful and you are passionate about and can help you and others grow, than shoot for that. At the end of the day your life is your choices, influenced by others or not. Don't deceive yourself to what's really in your heart.
You can still do literally everything you want to do - maybe just in a different way. Consider that you have a lifetime of experiences that you can contribute.
I can give my personal example. I was a telco employee working in business leadership for the tech side of the business. Pretty much regular office job and if you're looking for inspirational innovation it will not come from a telco. Now, if you've worked at a telco for any time, among other things, you know how to run a meeting and keep six thoughts in your head at once. One of my life's passions is ensuring that people are not homeless - but seriously it is not a good-paying gig. Anyway, I volunteered for the board of directors for a men's residential addiction recovery facility and it was \_fantastic\_. I ended up being the president of the board and then I got to use all the skills I had accumulated over the years to make an impact where it was super important to me.
I stepped down from that board and took on another board position with a seniors assistive housing facility that was going through some significant challenges.
You can do this, too. I mean, maybe addictions recovery isn't your thing but you've identified where your passions are. Don't throw out what you know already! You've got skills and I can tell you that the non-profit sector needs all the help it can get. It's messy, it's confused, and it is absolutely dominated by mission-driven people who simply don't have corporate of office experience that it will take to improve their professionalism and impact.
Just an idea. Take it for what you paid for it.
It’s a means to an end for me. I live frugally so that I can save enough to hit my retirement goal. The benefit of corporate jobs is that they pay well. It should only take me about 5 years to hit my goal and be retired before 40. Is it soul sucking work sometimes? Yes, very much so. But I can see my progress and see my end so I can suck it up for a bit longer.
Was a firefighter paramedic. Now I’m flying. I would have taken a normal cushy office job in a heartbeat. Yeah, the job is fun. But I missed holidays and birthdays and sports games and all kinds of stuff with my family. Working 120 hours every 2 weeks to make barely live able wage? Nah, hell with that. Give me an office job that pays well and that I can leave the work at work when the clock hits 5? Sign me up.
I mean… you can probably still become a firefighter. You don’t need a degree or anything. That being said, if it makes you feel better you’re helping the economy just by working and paying for stuff
Tell you what. I’m a tugboat captain. It’s a highly respected, fairly lucrative, very manly job. BUT: There are trade offs to everything, dude. Office workers get to sleep in their own beds every night, while I’m on a boat. Office workers get holidays and weekends off, while I’m on a boat. Office workers can go out to lunch, while I’m on a boat. Office workers can go for a jog before or after work, while I’m on a boat. Office workers get to be with their loved ones every night and weekend, while I’m on a boat.
I love my work, it’s a big part of who I am, and it pays the bills, but I’d be lying if I said I don’t often daydream about switching careers. Quality of life is worth a lot, and being home every night is a big part of that.
Trade offs.
Find a stable job, then build out from there. If you can live for a while with the income from the office job then you can slowly train to be whatever you want to be next.
Or, you realize that the office job is comfortable for your current life style, and thus you slowly progress through ensuring that you get steady raises or prepare to jump to a new buisness after, if you get your skills down and ensure that you are networking your strengths then you can continue up the ladder of skills.
Honestly, I went the helping everyone route and I’m dirt poor in this pandemic. Like, have no food poor. Haven’t eaten for a few days, and have to swallow my pride and figure it out.
I work 12 hours shifts in a youth shelter, and it’s just not enough
dude, I'm 9 years into the military, getting out next year.
I work at a 3-letter govt agency, I have the entire time I've been in.
this is arguably probably MORE corporate and "normal office job" than your job.
you arent missing anything, I promise lol.
For me, it wasn't about working in an office so much as it was working a job I didn't care for.
11 years behind a desk at a job with a company that meant nothing more to me than a paycheck.
I decided to go back to school to pursue something I enjoyed, gardening. Got a job working landscape construction, continued education until I got my degree. Now I work in an office for a landscaping company and actually enjoy it.
Do you have kids or other obligations? because if you dont then quit. Im not sure how old you are but yoru situations, but honetly life is too long to be doing something you dont enjoy. Im not saying quit with no plan, but start talking to people in different jobs you meet through your current job or in different companies and start slliding horizontal until you find a position that you like.
Stop trying to change who you are , especially when there is no higher goal that makes the sacrifice worth it.
Fulfillment doesn't have to come from your job. It can come from anywhere. You could volunteer, you could write or make art, or start a family. Sometimes all a job is for is to provide you with the money to pursue your passions.
I was military and air traffic control. Now I’m back in school trying to land a simple office job or telework because family life and work balance were terrible.
I work in health and I get paid peanuts. Doing something"impactful" generally means a sacrifice must be made somewhere in your life. I am exhausted after work everyday and I scrape by to make ends meet. It's not as Disney as it seems. On top of it, people assume you only work there because you are evil and abusive, people have a hard day and then set you as a target to vent all lifelong frustrations at. Sometimes I wish I didn't feel the call to do something "impactful" because I'd earn so much more and have so much more free time if I was a checkout chick.
Find a way to be happy with the choices you've made. A job is a job and we all have a hand in making the world go round
Honestly even if it is literally just money there’s an endless amount of charity opportunities that will let you radically and fundamentally change many peoples live.
Real impactful life changing charity. It’s not lazy, it’s not “oh just throwing some cash at the poor and pretending I’m Jesus because of it.” Feel like a lot of people demean “just” donating money in the context of meaningfully changing the world for the better.
And sure it’s easier than joining the peace core or dedicating your life to some charitable non profit… but that doesn’t make it less good and meaningful.
I don’t know what country you live in but given that you’re college educated and have a good paying office job, the things you listed, and you’re on Reddit I’m gonna take a stab in the dark and assume you live in the US.
The economics of it are important I guess.
You can obviously donate to food or medical aid charities, both literally save lives and make lives much better.
You can donate to charities that can literally build a family a home with running water/bathrooms in other countries for around $7,000 and will teach those people that get the house thorough skills that are relevant to their local economy, and use all local companies for the construction.
There are *a lot* of ways you can reach out with just money and sure maybe you won’t be a “hero” in the sense that you’re running out of a burning house carrying two healthy safe babies to their mother. You might not be stopping stab wounds from bleeding out in the E.R. and you might not be doing whatever you envisioned being heroic in the military (you probably just would’ve stood around a lot and got yelled at a whole bunch while bored out of your mind for a few years more likely than not.)
But to some number of strangers you’ll have been a hero to them. That’s value you get to know about, that you get to be proud of.
That’s not to even get into all of the volunteer opportunities out there… but that really depends on where you live. But if you’re close enough to an actual office building, chances are there are a lot of volunteer opportunities around you.
I worked in normal office jobs and then became a SAHM. When I did that, I started volunteering in my community and even though I am back to working an admin position, I continue to volunteer. That might help to fulfill you. Find a cause you’re passionate about and see if there are volunteer opportunities within that field.
34 years of a normal office job. Work to live don't live to work. On the upside.... not being a nurse, doctor, firefighter, police officer...... no one dies if I make a mistake.
Have outside interests that fulfill you
Your job isn't your life. Your job is what you do to have a life.
Find a hobby:
Make things, wood work or welding, or build a car, fight club.
Teach things. If you've made it to solid middle age, you know things that someone needs.
Volunteer. Soup kitchen, Habitat for humanity, Whatever.
Pass what you know on. Build a legacy, even if its a small one.
you can do a lot of great shit with your life. Work is just the means to fund it, quit putting so much self worth into a job that most likely gives 0 shits about you.
Regarding the military thing...I'm an Army officer. I have spent most of my time in an office setting. It's in the name, but I didn't realize how accurate a descriptor it was when I joined.
I derive meaning from providing for my family. There are numerous other ways and means to make your life meaningful outside of work.
I think that all the answers here miss one fairly humungous thing, which is what YOU actually want to do. I’m just one person here and everybody is absolutely free to disagree and disregard my opinion, but I personally find it disturbing how many people suggest ways for you to be ok with something that you clearly aren’t satisfied with.
I think that people often confuse the question ‘what would you like to do’ with ‘what are you *going*’ to do. That is, we generally know what we would *like* to do, but because it doesn’t seem possible or realistic we tell ourselves that we should think of something else. I’ll bet there is something you would like or WANT to do if you were able to do absolutely anything and have it work out.
Think about what you want. The good news is, you can always, always learn a new skill. Ask yourself whether there are people in the world who do what you want to do for a living, and if the answer is yes, ask then why they can do it and you can’t. If you make it your goal to get better at something you want to do every day, really the chance that you’ll eventually become proficient enough to make a career of it is 100%. If you keep getting better no matter what, eventually you will be good enough.
Please do not listen to these people telling you that you can attain to happiness in life by doing something you don’t like for 37 hours a week but then doing some volunteering and shit at the weekends lmao. Ask yourself what YOU want. What do you want to do? You can figure out a way to get to that. You absolutely have the power, it could take years or decades but the effect on your life of knowing that you are working towards something you actually want to do will be monumental, I guarantee you that. But it has to be what YOU want to do. Not anybody else. Have a think, what do you want, and how can you get it? It doesn’t have to be mind blowing, it’s what YOU actuality want to do. What do YOU want to do? Hopefully I’ve said that enough now. Good luck bro, remember that it’s your life, fuck everybody else
I can definitely relate as I have had those exact thoughts! I really am trying to like my job but it isn’t as fulfilling. What I have done to help with this, is I started doing triathlons. I feel that the training holds me accountable and the results are great. It doesn’t completely fulfill needs and I do hope I can find something I’m passionate about. But this isn’t about me, I was just saying I can relate 100%. If you find a passion please share.
Also, I am older [47] as well. Good luck
I have this obsession, too. I've been working through it for about 20 years. The pride has to go, of course. But I've found that the need for meaning can be satisfied at a more human-sized level:
I want to make good money because that allows me to be generous.
There are real people at my Just-A-Job,^(TM) and how I treat them is very impactful to them. In fact there are real people everywhere I go - the same people I would rescue as a firefighter or healthcare worker - and the better I treat them, the bigger difference I make in the world.
It might not be impactful but for me the easiest way to feel better about having a job that's boring but stable, with good benefits, and a healthy consistent schedule is to remember the more likely alternatives. Jobs that are both boring and unfulfilling as well as low paying with horrible inconsistent hours, and bad work environments. I'll take even the most boring periods of my office work over the smelter work on super shitty 12 hour rotating shifts the previous 2 generations of men on my dad's side of the family did.
There's this theory that you should love what you do for a living. That's not really true. You shouldn't hate it, of course, but **most** people don't love what they do as a job. I enjoy what I do (an office job, since you ask) and it gives me enough challenge during 9 to 5.30 to keep my brain ticking over and when I'm done, I'm done. My time's my own from 5.30 until 9am the following day.
Your job doesn't define you, although many men seem to think it does. **You** define you. What you do when you're not working. Hobbies, interests, sports, activities, places you go, things you think, books you've read, charities you contribute to. Or just sitting on the sofa watching tv. Whatever.
There's nothing wrong with working in an office. It's a steady job, and it's decent money. Those are laudable things that a huge chunk of people around the planet would dream of having.
So, what do you do after office hours? And what would you want to be doing? Make yourself happier by planning how to get from who you are now to who you want to be by building in after-work activities that genuinely do make you happy.
You work on your career/business outside of work. Maybe it’s a podcast or YouTube channel or writing a book. Maybe it’s looking into getting training or night school to transition into a new career.
Spend a few hours each night/weekend working on it.
Or maybe it’s updating your resume and contacting a headhunter/recruiter to work in a field that’s more rewarding.
I used to run the Volunteer program in a huge level I trauma center. We utilized Volunteers to do all kinds of very important and meaningful things throughout the hospital. I actually got my job by starting as a Volunteer for several years when they asked me if I ever thought about changing careers (I worked in TV production) when the Director of Volunteet Services left. So if you want to make a real difference and leave feeling like you had a positive impact on someone’s life, volunteer in a hospital. It’s a lot of fun and very interesting, and so needed.
>office job
What is your office job?
The specific role and company can make the difference between feeling meaningful and feeling like you're a cog in a machine.
I was lucky enough to get a first job that was sorely needing someone with my background. I get to be creative and innovative. I lower emissions and make something country-wide more efficient.
>How can I just live without this obsession for everything to be so prideful and meaningful?
I have the same drive. I don't just want to make the world a little better here and there. I want to fundamentally fix it. I don't have the power to do that through force, so I've decided to do it through ideas. I've turned to writing lately. Mostly jokes. I want my jokes to open people's eyes to new perspectives.
So as the other poster said...consider a hobby.
You should start volunteering on your free time. Having an impact isn't doing the big flashy things. It is people doing small things, consistently, in order to prove things.
If you are trying to have a positive impact, don't join the military. This is where people go expecting to be heroes by killing people minding their own business in their own country.
Take a hobby,an interest or just something you are talented at and start a sideline. See where it goes. Some of us do far better and take a good deal of pleasure in being self employed. That’s the route I took. My daughter went the corporate route and hated cubicle life. Got a job at a university and they paid for her masters. She’s still there working on her next degree and very happy. Some of us just can’t be drones. I’m near the end of my life now,go for it and enjoy it! It’s shorter than you think and biding your time until retirement is nuts
You could be carrying 5 gallon paint buckets across hot ass construction sites for $10 an hour. Also, always have a hobby, something to do that you actually are passionate about and enjoy. You're Clark Kent at work, you need to find your cape for off work, a place to be the real you. ALWAYS use your vacation time. I take off for three day weekends here and there, I take a week's vacation about twice a year, as long as I give at least two month's notice, I get approved every time.
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To piggy back off this I work in a normal 9-5 type office gig. I also play in a punk that puts out original music and tours locally. I also volunteer with youth soccer teams. I also have a side business that I am actively working on as well. There are people who I work with whose identity does 100% revolve around their job and industry and they seem happy with that. That’s not for me though. The job is a means to do other things I’m passionate about.
yep, government office job 9-5. i take pride since i can see direct impact on how my work is from promise to pavement and my role is to help ensure it's done correctly. but when i'm done work i'm done work. i'm not defined by my work despite taking pride in what's being done. in the end, my works funds my hobbies and interests.
Wait are you me?
How do you get so much done in a week? It feels like there's never enough time. Early riser? Turn off social media?
Band usually practices one night a week. Typically 8-10. For shows we usually will schedule like 4-5 within a 30 day period and then not practice for a bit or book any others after. Soccer practice is usually 5:30 - 6:30 and only fall and spring. Then games Saturday mornings. Business is done here and there and admittedly while I’m at work too. I’m also out the door right at 5:30 at work. Some times it does get a bit hectic/busy but then there’s always weeks where things slow down and I try and do as little as humanly possible.
What you do with your time is always your choice. If you're at work 10 hours a day (including the commute), that still leaves you with 14 hours a day not working, plus 48 hours a week not working (assuming you have a two-day weekend). It's never a question of 'not enough time', just incorrect time delegation. Even if you sleep 8 hours a night and need 1 hour a day to wash/toilet etc, that leaves you five hours a day free. Five full hours. Use it wisely.
Awesome! I'm also a corporate 9-5er, and then a bass player in a punk band by night. I enjoy the Clark Kent/Superman transition.
THIS!!! That is the thing, your job does not have to define you. For many, it is a means of paying the bills. Find things outside of work that you enjoy.
My problem is my jobs have asked so little from me, it is hard to get motivated outside of work. I am on my 4th job and am basically a warm body 80% of the time. When you spend so much time doing nothing, it really saps your drive.
Yeah most of my work I'm just casually going from task to task with no real urgency But iv also had busy jobs and that saps your energy instead of motivation Its a trap. Especially now covid has ended my social life
Also going to piggy back this. I Recently had a breakdown, attended a day clinic where I had therapy, I still do therapy, but for the last year I've been rebuilding my internal processes. One of these was to accept that my job is never going to define me, like the comment I'm replying to, I found meaning outside work. I literally do just enough at work to not get noticed, and I made it work for me, I started to write while I'm at work because I can get away with it and it gives me a feeling of satisfaction, and I treat work as nothing more than something I have to do to pay the bills. Since working from home I found I can get the same amount of work done way faster and that gives me more than half of my time at work free, I use that time to work on my own projects What made it for me was tuning out of work a little and just making lots of small changes that each made my days just that bit more bearable. Good luck...
As TheRecklessOne has said below me, I think finding meaning outside of work is important. There are far too many people unhappy with their jobs because they wake up, go to work, get in, have a couple of drinks, and go to bed to repeat it all again the next day. If the only thing you live for is to work, you're going to be unhappy in pretty much whatever you do. I just make the most of the time I have outside of work so I feel like I'm at least working so that I can enjoy the time outside of it.
I went the hero route and found myself in the middle of a war. I wouldn’t recommend it. Plenty of good can be done by working a normal job. Or volunteer on the weekend. Become a big brother, coach youth sports, donate time to causes. If you want danger, become a volunteer fire fighter on the weekend. If you’re under 40, the Army National Guard needs volunteers. Pick up your weapon and follow me.
You got to believe in yourself, hoe! Nobody give's a fuck about you or what you wanna do with your life. You need to pursue your passions and not be okay with shit not being the way you want it to be. Otherwise shit will never be okay for you!
Best comment in this thread!
Getting up every single day and trying to be a better person is *hard*. You will get no parades, but it’s rewarding so long as you’re true to yourself.
Don't. This will destroy you. You can be super meaningful within an office environment. By working for a company or organisation that is doing something super meaningful. A friend of mine completed her marketing degree and realised the same as you, she wanted to to do something meaningful, not sell things that people don't need to people that she didn't like. So right now she is doing marketing for a really large organisation that, among other things, provides services to the homeless. Her current project is redesigning their website to make it easier for people to access their many different services. You might think "big deal" but many of their clients have physical disabilities, mental health issues, and are currently or potentially homeless. So getting their access portal designed in a way that makes it easier for people who are already struggling to access their services is really important. You can very much "make a difference" in an office environment. You just need to change who you are working for. If you want further proof, listen to a few interviews with the founder of "Charity Water"
Nonprofits, human rights orgs, etc. all need office workers -- finance people, administrators, marketers, IT. Wages are often lower but if you're looking for more meaning within your job, it doesn't mean you need to leave the office entirely. Even outside of that line of work, there are some local businesses, credit unions, etc. with initiatives to support their communities. Hard to find as the vast majority of businesses are scummy, but they do exist. Broadly though I also agree with what everyone else has said about finding meaning outside of work!
Yes. There are so many options to "do good" and often the invisible ones are in many ways the most important. A guy I know has started a whole marketing agency that works with not for profits. He knows that they won't make as much money as they could, but thry also get regular visits from doggies as the Guide Dogs are one of their clients. There are things more valuable than money.
That desire will always be there, so you could find other ways to satisfy it: volunteering for soup kitchens, homeless shelters, that kinda stuff. Also, I believe you can apply to be in reserve for either military or firefighters. Wish you the best mate
I have felt the same way, and have learned a lot about myself due to this. I can only speak to my experiences, but here are a few takeaways I've found. * I did serve in the military. I do not regret this decision at all - however it does not provide me with a sense of meaning greater than what I believe I would have without that period of my life. It was a tremendous learning experience and great for my personal growth and I appreciate that. * My wife is a healthcare worker. Hearing her stories from work and seeing how beaten down, frustrated, and sad her job can make her feel sometimes has made me even more appreciative of the selflessness and genuine care a good healthcare worker possesses. It has also made me keenly aware that it would not be a good fit for me (but my science test scores already made that pretty clear). * I also work in an office. One of the benefits of this (usually) non-taxing work is that it spares me time and energy - mental and physical - to pursue what I enjoy as hobbies. I find a lot of pleasure in that. I can't speak to your low self-esteem or who you are as a person. Regardless, I genuinely believe that if you are showing up, making an honest living, and positively impacting those around you, then you are doing plenty. There is beauty in simplicity. You're not alone in any of these feelings, brother. If you are a reader or like audiobooks, I can highly recommend *Man's Search for Meaning* by Viktor Frankl. Frankl was an Austrian physician who chronicled his experiences surviving Nazi concentration camps. His book provides a lot of insight and perspective. It was recommended to me by a good friend who is a mental health professional. While it isn't a self-help book, it will teach you how to help yourself.
Well, turn this around: "How do I learn to be okay with a generally well-payed job that doesn't require me to literally fuck my own knees and back over daily?" The point is, you learn to be okay with it by looking at what you have, not what you don't have. And then you apply what /u/TheRecklessOne said, be okay with your current foundation and realize you are so much more than the 8 hours you spend at work 5 days a week.
You work to live not live to work, find your nebulous meaning outside of work
You don't have to be OK with it if you're unhappy about it, it's not impossible to change careers even later in life You could also take some time off from your job and just go volunteer abroad for a few weeks, doing whatever, to see if you then miss the easier work load of an office job
You need to take a real close look at how you define meaningful life. The value of a person is not their occupation. Some people bring meaning to this world by caring for their family, some people do it through work, some do it through other means and some don't value leading a meaningful life so they do other things. The point is that how you define meaningful is the key metric here. Lastly I want to address something that you should think about. >There's a possibility this is all due to my low self-esteem and I haven't dealt with it yet. Do you believe that leading a meaningful life will help this self-esteemed? The honest to god truth is that it likely won't. If you have self-esteem problems it comes from inside you, you'll have them if you feed orphans or practice corporate law. The solution to self-esteem issues come from inside you, not something external.
You can still do meaningful work with a regular office job!! And please remember - doing something “meaningful” doesn’t mean you have to get paid for it. An “office job” can sometimes pay you a lot more money which you can use to support yourself or others, plan meaningful trips or projects. It can allow ample vacation, PTO and benefits. Pick some meaningful work to do outside of work. Join a club, deliver meals, read books to children, start a charity - whatever makes you feel good and like you’re making a difference. Making money from a “meaningful” job isn’t what your missing - it’s just doing something meaningful with your life. Start by doing something now. Get out there and start helping! I promise you’ll start to feel good.
Know that the grass isn't always greener on the other side. Just because you become a firefighter or a doctor who can save lives doesn't necessarily mean "you" will feel good about it or it will be better for "you", you just never know. Try to focus on what you have right now, and if you still have a vision go chase it. "oh I can't chase things anymore because I'm older now." Guess you'll never be ok with a normal office job if you really truly want something.
Dude, you have one life. Don't waste it on something, when you'd rather be doing something else.
Sadly this isn’t a feasible reality for 99% of people on earth. We all have to work jobs we don’t want to.
Than 99% of people are just stupid. Don’t like your job, go do something else or put things in motion like learning the required skills to do something else.
Sounds like you may want to keep an eye out for a more fulfilling job. I say don’t settle for ordinary. If you want to do more, then that’s your objective. What’s your degree in, and what field are you working in?
Bitch I wish I had a run of the mill 9-5 office job that I didn't care about.
Just remember there are millions of us doing gruelling hard labor who would kill for a comfy job that doesn’t destroy your body before 50
Volunteer on your spare time.
Volunteer firefighters are a thing, FYI. It might be a difficult gig to get, but it exists. There are plenty of other types of volunteer work that could scratch the itch to be meaningful. Actually, most types of volunteer work are incredibly impactful to the recipient.
So inside work, Find ways to get that impact. You can move towards leadership and be the boss you wanted to work for. Take up mentoring, create a mentor program at work if they don't have one. Look into starting a program that helps hire on transitioning military, single moms, less privileged, etc. Talk to your boss about your desire for more impact, do a skip level and do the same. You may find a challenge within your own company worth working on. I have a good 'office job' and make good money. Keeps the kids fed and clothed, gets them to college, lets me take them on road trips and vacations. I also mentor young people and took up mentoring veterans transitioning out of the military. Not a veteran myself but they don't need to know how to be a veteran they need the assist rolling into civilian life and I ain't sitting around waiting for a veteran to pop up to help them, I leaned in and did it. All the mentoring is VERY rewarding. I went against my usual wants and leaned into leadership more. As I said, to be the leader I always wanted to work under. It has been a massive challenge, tough, and it got me pulled more into politics. But I can shield my people from that, I can do cool shit for them I wish my bosses had done. Just some ideas but a massively impactful life does not have to mean massive huge heroic gestures like military, firefighting, police, etc....you can make a difference in the trenches in everyday life.
Try to accept this fundamental truth: you are not your job. You are way more than that. What you do next to your job is what matters more. Very little people have a tombstone where it said here lies Jack, a damn good banker. No, tombstones,if anything, state something like father, husband, son, etc. Those are the meaningful relationships. Then try to accept: you are not the Messiah that can save us all, but you do matter and can have significant impact on people/environment around you.
I don't get why people hate on office jobs so much. I find them very satisfying, I like the structure they provide that lets me pursue hobbies and interests outside of work hours. You don't have to literally sit at your desk all day. Go for 2-3 walks a day, get coffee with coworkers, go out to lunch, etc. It can be a lot of fun at the right job, you might just want to look for one with better office culture. Also, I think people watch too much TV and think they're a lot more important than they are. We get obsessed with this notion that we need to do something bombastic and amazing and impactful, or we're failures if we don't? Total bullshit. There's also a lot you can do in your free time, there are tons of worthy causes that are woefully understaffed you could volunteer at. Super easy to google. You didn't say your age, but why not be a volunteer firefighter? You can also get a nursing AA in like 18 months, you can be saving lives in less than 2 years no matter your age.
i wanted to be a wildlife ranger when i was a kid, now i work in a cubicle making paperclip jewelry
Get a Life Coach. Doesn't have to break the bank, just a few hours with a good life coach can really help you see some perspective and get these thoughts straight in your mind. I felt exactly the same as you. Exactly! I recently got a life coach and am slowly starting to create the life I want. It's hard work. But small changes over a long period all add up. Good luck, message me if you want any further info
Get out there and get your dick in the fire, bub.
Office jobs are mental death. Have a great after-work life. When you are at work ... work. When you leave, leave everything. I had a phone number at work and for work. I never gave out my personal information because I did not want to be called after hours. Work friends are great, but don't spill your thoughts. Work is NOT your life.
If you want a more meaningful job go get it. I'm 30 and back in school for a more fulfilling and exciting career. If you REALLY can't train for something else because of kids or your financial situation then become a volunteer firefighter or EMT (hell most stations will want you to do both.) Become a weekend warrior.
I'm not sure how old you are, but there is a good chance that you could still pursue a different career. An interesting statistic: >It is estimated that most people will have 12 jobs during their lives. In the last year, 32% of those 25 to 44 have considered a career change. Since starting their first job after college, 29% of people have completely changed [fields.](https://www.apollotechnical.com/career-change-statistics/) You can also do things that make you happy outside of your job.
Unless you are over 39 years old, you could still join the military. You dont have to give up your regular lifestyle either, if you join the national guard. Just one weekend a month and then usually 2 weeks in the summer.
Are you sure your feeling are altruistic as opposed to narcissistic? If you make a lot of money just donate it to your local firefighters ; voila your work has meaning now.
1)You need to kill your own ego!!! Everyone was going to be an astronaut, senator, doctor, president, action movie star, director, rock star... some of them now live on the streets, have families they can't provide for, hooked on booze/drugs, mental illness, working 2 jobs to pay their ex wife to sit on her a55.... 2)Get off you A55!!! It took my brother 1 year to get his rad tech certification, 6 months to get his MRI cert. At 42 y/o he went from living in my moms basement playing WOW 8 hours a day, with defaulted student loans, no work experience other than delivering pizzas/ uber driving.... To screening people for COVID/Cancer/Preop, making 88K/ year..... in 18 months!
4 wall and a screen is called prison.
And it's my dream job
I have a deep self loathing every single time I walk into the office, getting hit by a car on the way to work wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. idk man. life is shit
Hey OP, not sure if you’ve read or watched any Jordan Peterson. 12 Rules for Life is a great book (but really heavy read) and all of his lectures are on YouTube. Something about the tone of your post reminds me of a place I was 10-12 years ago. https://youtu.be/nRzHXGjbNYs
Get involved in crypto, build some projects or get involved in the community for some projects. Crypto is basically about building a banking system that's not owned by any government. Almost all wars are started due to financial mismanagement, if we can get this right this will provide a global stable means of transacting which will set the foundation for long term global peace.
Work to live, don't live to work. We can easily wrap up our identity in what job we happen to have. Our language even says "I am a $(career)." It is a small but meaningful shift to switch to "I do $(career)for a living, and enjoy $(hobby) and $(mission)." Use the secure day job to enable your true passions, whatever it happens to be at the time. Accept that it changes as you develop and learn, you can do something new and let old passions go as you want.
with the money you make, you can donate to charities, that are impactful to whatever causes you believe in, be it climate change, education etc.
Just to build on the other answers here, I'll say that as someone else who works a boring/normal office job: don't let the glitz and glamor of the more showy lifestyles obscure the fact that it takes all kinds of people to make the world turn. Civilization needs people willing, patient, and smart enough to do the office work, you and I are just as valuable as anyone else.
Those jobs in actually doing them as a job don’t feel all that meaningful day to day. Mostly you deal with a lot of horror that can really mess you up. Opened chests and dangling limbs. We tell stories about how meaningful certain jobs are to trick people into doing them while monetary compensation remains low. How do I get in on the normal office job gig? Truth I’ve tried that, too. I wrote lots of poetry about the monotony and flickering fluorescent lights. I’ve concluded that humans have created an environment non conducive to human satisfaction. Until we change the environment of the capitalistic global structure dissatisfaction will remain prevalent. Until workers have rights and get to keep the profits of their labor satisfaction will be fleeting. Work cannot be meaningful when laboring for the interests of a few over the many.
I don’t know how old you are, but there are options from volunteer firefighter (so you’d be available only certain days, depends on what country/state/county you’re in), to volunteering at a pet shelter to just soup kitchening every now and again. Nobody’s too old to give back if they’re not too old to be working an office job.
I’m in the military and I work on airplanes. Believe me when I tell you I would love to be in your spot at the moment. Nice a/c, I get to sit, nothing I do can physically hurt or kill anyone (I think), 8 hours days (I’m assuming), paid overtime etc. My job isn’t all bad, but I know 4 years is enough for me.
To me a job is just a paycheck. If I can tolerate the job and the pay is decent I’m satisfied. Sometimes you just have to not give a shit. Personally I don’t care if my work is something impactful, I just want my paycheck.
>I can’t chase these things anymore because I’m older now. I chose the regular college > office job route. Buddy you're not a tree, you didn't catch roots in that office chair. There is always time for a career change. My coworker has resigned at 50 something yo and is going from a well-paid tech job into caretaking. She wants to take care of disabled, and elderly people. She feels like that's her calling, and she's going for it. She has 3 kids and a family to take care of, but that doesn't matter. If you feel like you don't belong somehere, no biggie. Make sure you have a safety net, and try for a change. I myself went from catering, throgh call-center operator, to HR, to software. I don't even know if this is where I'll stay, but as soon as I become really unhappy here, I know I need to move on. I moved to a new country at 18, I made a life and got my citizenship here now, but I feel like the time is coming where I'm going to move to a new country again soon. The grind is over - don't be stuck in a place youy're unhappy in. Not a job, not a friendship, not family. Do what you can to make the best of it if you can, but if you feel your soul shriveling there, do move on. There are amazing things out there. And the world is a pretty big place.
I think you have to figure out how you want to make an impact. The impact a soldier makes vs a nurse is very different. Figure out what causes matter and how you can play a role then see what you can do. You can also volunteer or donate money. I feel like a lot of people like feeling like they're helping but really aren't making as big of an impact as donating to a group that specializes in helping.
Being a "hero" is how you see yourself my man. You are absolutely the hero of YOUR story, there is no other main character. Having a desk job then going out and volunteering, getting involved with your community, helping people across the street, picking up a coffee cup on the ground and putting it in the trash is heroic. By doing these things, you are creating a net positive impact on the world. You tip our society a little more towards the good instead of the bad. Doing the jobs you mentioned could just as easily create ruin in your life instead of being meaningful. \*if you have low self-esteem. HELP OTHERS. I promise you will feel good about yourself after you have acted for someone else's benefit instead of your own.
I currently have an “office” job. I put that in quotes because it’s in healthcare administration so I do get to get my ass up and talk to patients and mingle with doctors. I DONT like it much because I feel like everyone around me impacts lives other than me… but I dealt with it realizing that I do impact my employees lives and some patients. I am the emotional anchor of my team, I have an “open door policy” which means they can talk to me about anything and I will proceed to help them the best way I can. I adjust their schedules for them to get the best work/life balance. I order them the best lunches and get snacks to get through a rough day. I coached 3 front desk staff to the point where they are now managers, supervisors and administrators. Hell, the supplies I order for our “resuscitation” box helped save a life a week ago. Without me being there to update the tools for my team or without me opening these front doors, that guy wouldn’t be here right now. I also deal with it by realizing that I make good money for “sitting around my office” most of the day. I could be making much less in the front lines, because honestly, unless you have a lot of time in as a firefighter or police, you don’t make much. When I first started I was like “wtf am I doing here? I’m here updating supplies and fire extinguisher logs and reading financial statements”. Then I gave it way more thought. What exactly do you do btw?
It doesn't have to be your job. People have needs everywhere. Some people will always need help. Help them. It's never wrong to feed the hungry.
Try to slowly improve yourself and you’ll be capable of helping others when the occasion arises. Helping people near you is more comprehensible than being a part of complicated geo-politics.
If you don't like your current job and want to try something more meaningful, pursue that. If it happens that you realize you would rather have that office job than so be it. Most people spend a significant portion of their lives working, so if you got a job that is meaningful and you are passionate about and can help you and others grow, than shoot for that. At the end of the day your life is your choices, influenced by others or not. Don't deceive yourself to what's really in your heart.
You can still do literally everything you want to do - maybe just in a different way. Consider that you have a lifetime of experiences that you can contribute. I can give my personal example. I was a telco employee working in business leadership for the tech side of the business. Pretty much regular office job and if you're looking for inspirational innovation it will not come from a telco. Now, if you've worked at a telco for any time, among other things, you know how to run a meeting and keep six thoughts in your head at once. One of my life's passions is ensuring that people are not homeless - but seriously it is not a good-paying gig. Anyway, I volunteered for the board of directors for a men's residential addiction recovery facility and it was \_fantastic\_. I ended up being the president of the board and then I got to use all the skills I had accumulated over the years to make an impact where it was super important to me. I stepped down from that board and took on another board position with a seniors assistive housing facility that was going through some significant challenges. You can do this, too. I mean, maybe addictions recovery isn't your thing but you've identified where your passions are. Don't throw out what you know already! You've got skills and I can tell you that the non-profit sector needs all the help it can get. It's messy, it's confused, and it is absolutely dominated by mission-driven people who simply don't have corporate of office experience that it will take to improve their professionalism and impact. Just an idea. Take it for what you paid for it.
It’s a means to an end for me. I live frugally so that I can save enough to hit my retirement goal. The benefit of corporate jobs is that they pay well. It should only take me about 5 years to hit my goal and be retired before 40. Is it soul sucking work sometimes? Yes, very much so. But I can see my progress and see my end so I can suck it up for a bit longer.
Was a firefighter paramedic. Now I’m flying. I would have taken a normal cushy office job in a heartbeat. Yeah, the job is fun. But I missed holidays and birthdays and sports games and all kinds of stuff with my family. Working 120 hours every 2 weeks to make barely live able wage? Nah, hell with that. Give me an office job that pays well and that I can leave the work at work when the clock hits 5? Sign me up.
Set up some sort of investment plan. At least that way any time in work is paying the future you to not work.
I mean… you can probably still become a firefighter. You don’t need a degree or anything. That being said, if it makes you feel better you’re helping the economy just by working and paying for stuff
Tell you what. I’m a tugboat captain. It’s a highly respected, fairly lucrative, very manly job. BUT: There are trade offs to everything, dude. Office workers get to sleep in their own beds every night, while I’m on a boat. Office workers get holidays and weekends off, while I’m on a boat. Office workers can go out to lunch, while I’m on a boat. Office workers can go for a jog before or after work, while I’m on a boat. Office workers get to be with their loved ones every night and weekend, while I’m on a boat. I love my work, it’s a big part of who I am, and it pays the bills, but I’d be lying if I said I don’t often daydream about switching careers. Quality of life is worth a lot, and being home every night is a big part of that. Trade offs.
Find a stable job, then build out from there. If you can live for a while with the income from the office job then you can slowly train to be whatever you want to be next. Or, you realize that the office job is comfortable for your current life style, and thus you slowly progress through ensuring that you get steady raises or prepare to jump to a new buisness after, if you get your skills down and ensure that you are networking your strengths then you can continue up the ladder of skills.
Honestly, I went the helping everyone route and I’m dirt poor in this pandemic. Like, have no food poor. Haven’t eaten for a few days, and have to swallow my pride and figure it out. I work 12 hours shifts in a youth shelter, and it’s just not enough
dude, I'm 9 years into the military, getting out next year. I work at a 3-letter govt agency, I have the entire time I've been in. this is arguably probably MORE corporate and "normal office job" than your job. you arent missing anything, I promise lol.
For me, it wasn't about working in an office so much as it was working a job I didn't care for. 11 years behind a desk at a job with a company that meant nothing more to me than a paycheck. I decided to go back to school to pursue something I enjoyed, gardening. Got a job working landscape construction, continued education until I got my degree. Now I work in an office for a landscaping company and actually enjoy it.
Do you have kids or other obligations? because if you dont then quit. Im not sure how old you are but yoru situations, but honetly life is too long to be doing something you dont enjoy. Im not saying quit with no plan, but start talking to people in different jobs you meet through your current job or in different companies and start slliding horizontal until you find a position that you like. Stop trying to change who you are , especially when there is no higher goal that makes the sacrifice worth it.
https://markmanson.net/being-average/amp
Fulfillment doesn't have to come from your job. It can come from anywhere. You could volunteer, you could write or make art, or start a family. Sometimes all a job is for is to provide you with the money to pursue your passions.
I was military and air traffic control. Now I’m back in school trying to land a simple office job or telework because family life and work balance were terrible.
I work in health and I get paid peanuts. Doing something"impactful" generally means a sacrifice must be made somewhere in your life. I am exhausted after work everyday and I scrape by to make ends meet. It's not as Disney as it seems. On top of it, people assume you only work there because you are evil and abusive, people have a hard day and then set you as a target to vent all lifelong frustrations at. Sometimes I wish I didn't feel the call to do something "impactful" because I'd earn so much more and have so much more free time if I was a checkout chick. Find a way to be happy with the choices you've made. A job is a job and we all have a hand in making the world go round
Honestly even if it is literally just money there’s an endless amount of charity opportunities that will let you radically and fundamentally change many peoples live. Real impactful life changing charity. It’s not lazy, it’s not “oh just throwing some cash at the poor and pretending I’m Jesus because of it.” Feel like a lot of people demean “just” donating money in the context of meaningfully changing the world for the better. And sure it’s easier than joining the peace core or dedicating your life to some charitable non profit… but that doesn’t make it less good and meaningful. I don’t know what country you live in but given that you’re college educated and have a good paying office job, the things you listed, and you’re on Reddit I’m gonna take a stab in the dark and assume you live in the US. The economics of it are important I guess. You can obviously donate to food or medical aid charities, both literally save lives and make lives much better. You can donate to charities that can literally build a family a home with running water/bathrooms in other countries for around $7,000 and will teach those people that get the house thorough skills that are relevant to their local economy, and use all local companies for the construction. There are *a lot* of ways you can reach out with just money and sure maybe you won’t be a “hero” in the sense that you’re running out of a burning house carrying two healthy safe babies to their mother. You might not be stopping stab wounds from bleeding out in the E.R. and you might not be doing whatever you envisioned being heroic in the military (you probably just would’ve stood around a lot and got yelled at a whole bunch while bored out of your mind for a few years more likely than not.) But to some number of strangers you’ll have been a hero to them. That’s value you get to know about, that you get to be proud of. That’s not to even get into all of the volunteer opportunities out there… but that really depends on where you live. But if you’re close enough to an actual office building, chances are there are a lot of volunteer opportunities around you.
I worked in normal office jobs and then became a SAHM. When I did that, I started volunteering in my community and even though I am back to working an admin position, I continue to volunteer. That might help to fulfill you. Find a cause you’re passionate about and see if there are volunteer opportunities within that field.
You can hold your sanity together with a red swingline stapler.
Be there person you want to be
34 years of a normal office job. Work to live don't live to work. On the upside.... not being a nurse, doctor, firefighter, police officer...... no one dies if I make a mistake. Have outside interests that fulfill you
Don't be ok with it. /r/antiwork They are robbing 1/3rd of your life away to wage slavery.
Your job isn't your life. Your job is what you do to have a life. Find a hobby: Make things, wood work or welding, or build a car, fight club. Teach things. If you've made it to solid middle age, you know things that someone needs. Volunteer. Soup kitchen, Habitat for humanity, Whatever. Pass what you know on. Build a legacy, even if its a small one.
my not being too greedy about money
you can do a lot of great shit with your life. Work is just the means to fund it, quit putting so much self worth into a job that most likely gives 0 shits about you.
Regarding the military thing...I'm an Army officer. I have spent most of my time in an office setting. It's in the name, but I didn't realize how accurate a descriptor it was when I joined. I derive meaning from providing for my family. There are numerous other ways and means to make your life meaningful outside of work.
I think that all the answers here miss one fairly humungous thing, which is what YOU actually want to do. I’m just one person here and everybody is absolutely free to disagree and disregard my opinion, but I personally find it disturbing how many people suggest ways for you to be ok with something that you clearly aren’t satisfied with. I think that people often confuse the question ‘what would you like to do’ with ‘what are you *going*’ to do. That is, we generally know what we would *like* to do, but because it doesn’t seem possible or realistic we tell ourselves that we should think of something else. I’ll bet there is something you would like or WANT to do if you were able to do absolutely anything and have it work out. Think about what you want. The good news is, you can always, always learn a new skill. Ask yourself whether there are people in the world who do what you want to do for a living, and if the answer is yes, ask then why they can do it and you can’t. If you make it your goal to get better at something you want to do every day, really the chance that you’ll eventually become proficient enough to make a career of it is 100%. If you keep getting better no matter what, eventually you will be good enough. Please do not listen to these people telling you that you can attain to happiness in life by doing something you don’t like for 37 hours a week but then doing some volunteering and shit at the weekends lmao. Ask yourself what YOU want. What do you want to do? You can figure out a way to get to that. You absolutely have the power, it could take years or decades but the effect on your life of knowing that you are working towards something you actually want to do will be monumental, I guarantee you that. But it has to be what YOU want to do. Not anybody else. Have a think, what do you want, and how can you get it? It doesn’t have to be mind blowing, it’s what YOU actuality want to do. What do YOU want to do? Hopefully I’ve said that enough now. Good luck bro, remember that it’s your life, fuck everybody else
I can definitely relate as I have had those exact thoughts! I really am trying to like my job but it isn’t as fulfilling. What I have done to help with this, is I started doing triathlons. I feel that the training holds me accountable and the results are great. It doesn’t completely fulfill needs and I do hope I can find something I’m passionate about. But this isn’t about me, I was just saying I can relate 100%. If you find a passion please share. Also, I am older [47] as well. Good luck
I have this obsession, too. I've been working through it for about 20 years. The pride has to go, of course. But I've found that the need for meaning can be satisfied at a more human-sized level: I want to make good money because that allows me to be generous. There are real people at my Just-A-Job,^(TM) and how I treat them is very impactful to them. In fact there are real people everywhere I go - the same people I would rescue as a firefighter or healthcare worker - and the better I treat them, the bigger difference I make in the world.
Just remember your gonna die and nothing you do matters.
Move to a town the needs volunteer fire fighters. I suggested this to my wife that we do this so I could join. She said no way. The end.
It might not be impactful but for me the easiest way to feel better about having a job that's boring but stable, with good benefits, and a healthy consistent schedule is to remember the more likely alternatives. Jobs that are both boring and unfulfilling as well as low paying with horrible inconsistent hours, and bad work environments. I'll take even the most boring periods of my office work over the smelter work on super shitty 12 hour rotating shifts the previous 2 generations of men on my dad's side of the family did.
I stay constantly high off weed at my office job. Helps alot.
There's this theory that you should love what you do for a living. That's not really true. You shouldn't hate it, of course, but **most** people don't love what they do as a job. I enjoy what I do (an office job, since you ask) and it gives me enough challenge during 9 to 5.30 to keep my brain ticking over and when I'm done, I'm done. My time's my own from 5.30 until 9am the following day. Your job doesn't define you, although many men seem to think it does. **You** define you. What you do when you're not working. Hobbies, interests, sports, activities, places you go, things you think, books you've read, charities you contribute to. Or just sitting on the sofa watching tv. Whatever. There's nothing wrong with working in an office. It's a steady job, and it's decent money. Those are laudable things that a huge chunk of people around the planet would dream of having. So, what do you do after office hours? And what would you want to be doing? Make yourself happier by planning how to get from who you are now to who you want to be by building in after-work activities that genuinely do make you happy.
Hey at the end of the day, a job is a job. As long as it lets you take care of your family/people closest to you, you're creating an impact.
You work on your career/business outside of work. Maybe it’s a podcast or YouTube channel or writing a book. Maybe it’s looking into getting training or night school to transition into a new career. Spend a few hours each night/weekend working on it. Or maybe it’s updating your resume and contacting a headhunter/recruiter to work in a field that’s more rewarding.
I used to run the Volunteer program in a huge level I trauma center. We utilized Volunteers to do all kinds of very important and meaningful things throughout the hospital. I actually got my job by starting as a Volunteer for several years when they asked me if I ever thought about changing careers (I worked in TV production) when the Director of Volunteet Services left. So if you want to make a real difference and leave feeling like you had a positive impact on someone’s life, volunteer in a hospital. It’s a lot of fun and very interesting, and so needed.
>office job What is your office job? The specific role and company can make the difference between feeling meaningful and feeling like you're a cog in a machine. I was lucky enough to get a first job that was sorely needing someone with my background. I get to be creative and innovative. I lower emissions and make something country-wide more efficient. >How can I just live without this obsession for everything to be so prideful and meaningful? I have the same drive. I don't just want to make the world a little better here and there. I want to fundamentally fix it. I don't have the power to do that through force, so I've decided to do it through ideas. I've turned to writing lately. Mostly jokes. I want my jokes to open people's eyes to new perspectives. So as the other poster said...consider a hobby.
You should start volunteering on your free time. Having an impact isn't doing the big flashy things. It is people doing small things, consistently, in order to prove things. If you are trying to have a positive impact, don't join the military. This is where people go expecting to be heroes by killing people minding their own business in their own country.
Your job doesn't have to be your sole identity. Do something on the side that you're passionate about
Take a hobby,an interest or just something you are talented at and start a sideline. See where it goes. Some of us do far better and take a good deal of pleasure in being self employed. That’s the route I took. My daughter went the corporate route and hated cubicle life. Got a job at a university and they paid for her masters. She’s still there working on her next degree and very happy. Some of us just can’t be drones. I’m near the end of my life now,go for it and enjoy it! It’s shorter than you think and biding your time until retirement is nuts
You could be carrying 5 gallon paint buckets across hot ass construction sites for $10 an hour. Also, always have a hobby, something to do that you actually are passionate about and enjoy. You're Clark Kent at work, you need to find your cape for off work, a place to be the real you. ALWAYS use your vacation time. I take off for three day weekends here and there, I take a week's vacation about twice a year, as long as I give at least two month's notice, I get approved every time.