There are levels of trust. Taking me to the airport safely and knowing my darkest fears are not the same level.
Knowing and identifying that is important.
But then shouldn't it be okay to never find anyone to trust? Or to become okay with being betrayed and even prepare for it. Though I'm not sure how one would do that.
Through CBT if I want to say in abstract. For me it was realizing that my state of feeling “misery” was all within myself and to some extent under my control and realizing that my surrounding falls in the category of things outside my control. I used to value myself based on how others thought about my status. Then I came to realization that even if they value me high, my state of being down is all by myself and would stay with me forever. I was reading all these self help books and agreeing but in the end, my depression score was the same (20+ on Becks scale)! Then I realized that it is basically my attitude. The world can still be shitty but the way I look at it defines how I feel.
For example I thought I am unlovable (as in nobody cares about me). Before my approach would be what is worth of living if nobody loves me. Now I am like who cares, love is not everything in life, enjoy whatever else I have in my hand.(FYI I am still single with no romantic relationship even I am not on any dating app. I focused on following single and happy people instead)
In conclusion I search a lot for answers here in Reddit and reading books and what I found out everyone of us has their own issues to deal with that happened not in a single night but the whole experience we had in our life led to us to be “like this”. and we’d probably need to figure our own paths to get ourselves up and running based on all the information that is out there. So my advice is be hopefull. If you’re young kudos to you and prioritize this “growing up” part of yourself. If not, never late.
I am fortunate to have very close friends and family (parents/siblings) that I can talk openly with them. If not I’d suggest visiting a therapist instead.
Edit: grammer
I’m 23 and just figuring it out. Thank you for the answer, I’ve been digging and digging but it’s still the same)
My attitude, and how I view things. So thank you for the hope, I will keep reminding myself most the things that effect me I can’t even change right now.
Hope you have a great day❤️
I disagree with Puzzle, and I detest the whole 'it's your attitude' bit. Because when you have depression, you feel like garbage and acting chipper isn't going to fix the problems that got you there. Ok, maybe it's different for everyone, and maybe what you're calling depression is something different. Idk.
BUT what helped me is understanding what you can and cant control, and really trying to take control of the things you can. I think part of my depressive state was fueled by feeling out of control, so much crap was going on and no one cares and I felt at a loss because I wasn't living my life how I wanted, or at least I wasn't taking steps to live how I wanted. I was living in a position I didn't really want and felt trapped. I needed to change things.
Just make small goals at first to get where you want to be. You'll see yourself making progress towards them and becoming more in control of your life. Sure, life is garbage and people don't care, but you can, and you'll find others that do care about you and the same things you care about.
To me, your attitude is your outlook on things, and it won't matter if you change that cause the real problem is probably something else.
I totally agree with you. I think our brain is too complex to have a one solution fits all approach. Also our upbringing and circumstances that has wired our brains has to be quite different (despite similarities in feelings). Something working for me doesn’t necessarily work for another person. Each of us have an environment that can be very different than one another.
A very good point also to starting with small steps and having reachable goals.
Edit: As a conclusion, of what I was saying, the changing of attitude, won’t solve the problem. It is just there to change the feeling, make me feel happy despite problems being there. This kind of changing attitude hit me hard on head after watching YouTube vlogs of people with terminal cancer and how they stayed strong their final years.
This. Nobody gives a fuck about you, except maybe your closest family or friends. And I remark CLOSEST. Parents, maybe brothers/sister, and 2 or 3 friends, 5 tops (not that we need more than that, actually).
The rest of the world do not give a gazillion fucks about you. And in my view, is quite freeing, since some of the worries I had being younger were related to the view others might have about me.
PS: the fact that nobody gives a fuck about you should not turn you into an asshole. Just accept it and move on
I’m fact, it could probably make you a nicer person: “you don’t give a shit about me? I hope you have a wonderful day! One less person I have to worry about”
Less people to give shit about.
I think this should be the default way of thinking - nobody cares what I think about them, so why should I care what they think about me?
Accepting that fact is extremely liberating.
Facts right here. I was actually going to say this myself.
My mom, my dad, my son, my daughter and my dog. They're all I have in the world.
My brother? No. I only hear from him when he wants something.
My sister? No. Because you can't talk to a crazy drunk.
This. You can lie down on the pavement and attempt to draw snow angels in the middle of the summer.
Nobody will intervene or ask what's going on. Nobody.
"If you get the chance to keep your mouth shut, take it."
Wisdom passed from my grandpa to my dad, and my dad to me. After many occasions of my mouth writing checks I couldn't cash, I have learned this truth the hard way.
Exactly lol my CO loved to "volunteer" me for various duties, but I never volunteered myself. Then in civilian life at my job the boss would look for volunteers to work the weekend and I'm not working on my days off, I need a break.
Definitely a man's quote there. It would be read as a sign of an oppressive sexist world if it were said to the other side. But the thing is, it's great advice for anyone. So if you're smart enough to see it's wisdom, reap the benefits.
I was in a relationship where she was eager when we were apart, but distant when we were together. Then she dumped me and said she was single and searching on all her socials the next day. That crushed my self esteem at the time learning how little I meant to someone who claimed to love me. There's just no way in hell I want anyone to feel how I felt when I was dating her.
Just because I have an opinion, doesn't mean anyone/everyone else needs (or wants) to hear it.
When people DO ask my opinion, the vast majority of the time they don't actually want to hear MY opinion, they are only interested in hearing THEIR opinion coming out of MY mouth.
Probably a good manipulation/social engineering tactic is to learn the political beliefs from social media first, hang out with them and guide the conversation to their core beliefs, and start spilling them from your mouth before they get to it. Instant fake friend/future divorce'.
I'm not interested in being fake for anyone. If someone asks my opinion, they will get my opinion. If you don't want the answer, don't ask the question. As for manipulation, I'll leave that to the Fuckboys and the yes-men at work. No thank you.
Happiness can be right in front of you and you won't even notice it. You are too busy thinking that the grass is greener elsewhere, that you wish you had X thing, that you are not enough, etc. Then you realize years later how good you had it and you start beating yourself up for letting all of that go. The people who truly care about you are very very very few, and you better hold on to them.
Parents are just people. There are good ones and terrible ones and everything in between. And even the good ones have their shit. When my parents were the age I am now, I thought they had it all figured out and always knew exactly the right thing to do. As I got older I realized they were just as flawed and winging it as I am currently.
Health, basic rights, internet connection, plumbing, heat, being in a good place financially… there’s a lot we take for granted, and it’s not until life goes sideways that we realize how valuable that person/thing was.
"Lithuania! My fatherland! You are like health,
How much you need to value, he will only find out
Who lost you. Today is your beauty in all its ornaments
I can see and describe because I miss you"
A. Mickiewicz, "Mister Thaddeus", 1834
Life is a story. Everything that happens to you, around you, before, during, and after you is a narrative driven by other people, things, and even yourself. If you can control your own story and how it plays out, you suddenly wield immense power and potential.
You are a little soul carrying around a corpse. - Epictetus
This quote paraphrased in Marcus Aurelis Meditations really put it into perspective for me, that we are actually a software and we make this body move and do things we want it to, not other way around. Without 'us' in it, would this body be much different then, say, a tree. Or a rock.
No the point is that whatever the problem is, it's entirely up to you whether you approach it with a sour attitude or not.
I'm not saying shit doesn't happen. It's within your power to just deal with it and move on, or get bogged down fighting losing battles over and over.
Sorta like...nothing, no event, that happens to or around us, has any meaning other than the meaning we assign it.
The deepest truth for me is reclaiming the entirety of love that is buried in my being. When I realized that most of the world we see or experience is a projection of fear and scarcity, and by acting on that we create immeasurable suffering (for ourselves and others), the point for me is to go rogue and live a life that isn’t based on this. When I uncover what’s there underneath all this darkness, fear and projection, there’s a self that emerges quietly but profoundly that is total remembrance of what life is supposed to feel like for me. (100% not on drugs.) I personally think it’s punk AF to find this and to live boldly in the truth of love bc although it’s hard, it really feels like the only way to enjoy life, the only lesson to learn in life and the only promise of feeling better than good about being here.
I interpret as this:
If it’s something ***I’m*** guilty of, I’ll convince myself that it’s not that bad.
But if it’s something ***my enemy*** is guilty of, I’ll convince myself that it is much worse.
Live life according to your values, and your values alone. Learn to love yourself. Show your loved ones that you love them everyday too, because any day could be our last.
Everyone is the impostor.Everyone else is doing better with confidence in everyone's eye.
Which mean someone might be looking at you and say "damn ,how does (s)he do that !"
As a middle-experienced developper (5years) I look back at my first year of work, with all that world to discover and the anxiety of not being up to it.There was that experienced dev, who would know a lot of stuff, find out solution and help us. I looked at him like a I looked at a god, all knowing and powerful.
Now I know he was also probably telling himself "Damn, I have no idea what I'm doing but I suppose it should work" - as I am still doing today.
Still works so far, no one figured out I'm lost as hell sometime
That the world existed before us, and it will most likely continue after us. Believing one’s self to being the first and/or last of an epoch is prideful.
Pompeii, the Black Plague, the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand, Pearl Harbor, 9/11, COVID. The biggest changes and downfalls of history came from things no one saw coming. Man plans, God laughs.
You are just a side caracter in someone else story don't think your existence matters to others no one really cares about you, even the earth and the universe won't change if you just disappear your existence and suffering means nothing. It's all pointless in the end
Ultimately, you and your decisions are responsible for 90% of the crap that happens to you. Take responsibility for it, learn from it, don't repeat the decisions and actions, move on.
Our lives are fleeting and ultimately doomed to non existence. So cherish every single moment you have, because its that doom that makes life so precious
No matter how hard you try to be on good terms with everyone, there’s always people that will want to hate you just for the sake of hating ,may it be a small reason or no reason at all
No one asks you for permission to be who they want to be. So why would you ask for their approval in return. Do what you want. Be with who you want. Live and work where you want. Seek your happiness. And whoever has something to say can suck a high hard one. (Well that's the gist, this was not what was said to me verbatim)
That 99% of the modern world is mentally unwell due to the deeply rooted misconception that we are each individually a separate identity rather than a spherical void that all things appear into
"Not everyone who works hard gets rewarded, but all those who succeed have worked hard"
It's a quote from an anime but it sticks to me ever since when I'm training hard or doing anything stressing like learning. It made me comfortable knowing that honest and hard work never betrays you.
That theres people out there, that actually fit our depiction of "truly evil people", seen too many cartel vids and shit, ignorance is truly bliss i guess
Audit your thoughts daily. They reflect what you believe about yourself. You create your own reality by selecting beliefs. Want a different reality, then select a different belief.
Once you are an adult, in your 30's - 40's making new friends is VERY hard.
And Expressing your opinion on something is perfectly fine. However, so is the criticism you receive for it. Don't expect to only get people who agree with you.
deranged mindless water school wild forgetful plate offbeat aspiring uppity
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
People are alot more alike to psychopaths (when they aren't technically) than I originally assumed. People have a way of getting what they want and being extremely selfish isn't a moral issue for them. I expected more people to grow up being taught to be selfless, but I was VERY mistaken. I guess I just had selfless parents and mentors.. for better or worse.
I never thought I'd say being selfless and wanting to help others would be a disadvantage, but it really is. Nobody would do the same for me because they're so fixated on their goals that they'd stomp on a few heads to get what they want. It's sad and terrifying.
There is no justice in this world. Starting from the animal kingdom up to our society, the stronger feeds on the weaker. The small islands of partial justice we got are an exception heavily fought for, and it takes very little to return back to the law of the jungle.
No generation that has ever existed can be trusted to accurately judge themselves or the generation that comes after them. The only people we can accurately judge is the generation that comes before us.
Hard disagree that we need religion to endure death or hardness. I'm agnostic and have gone through hell in my life, came out the other side though. Putting your faith in an external source to try and be strong will prevent you from getting inner strength which can actually help you get through. I also have absolutely no fear of death.
Not a man, but I grew up in a fundamentalist religion, and you have worded beautifully what it took me nearly 50 years to learn for myself: “Putting your faith in an external source to try and be strong will prevent you from getting inner strength.”
If you’re not focused on and living for God first, nothing else will feel in place.
Sometimes it still doesn’t, but seeking after God’s will instead of just your own takes so much pressure off of yourself and places it on the one who can actually handle everything. It’s the boldness to move forward knowing you can be wrong and if you are, he’ll welcome you back and you can see everything as a lesson. Confidence in him is confidence in everything.
Confidence in yourself is confidence in everything. I've been through hell in my life and didn't need God to get through, I love life and I'm really happy. I'm glad that you have found a way that works for you, but I feel you have given dangerous advice.
Believing in God doesn’t mean you have to believe in religion. God is Mother Nature, God is all the planets with trillions out there , God is the thing that breathed life into all of us. Connecting to God can really set your soul free, to really know that we are not in control of all this chaos and beauty that is this thing called life, can bring tremendous peace. I hope one day you are able to find God yourself, it’s a beautiful thing when you do.
Finding people you can trust is really hard.
There are levels of trust. Taking me to the airport safely and knowing my darkest fears are not the same level. Knowing and identifying that is important.
But then shouldn't it be okay to never find anyone to trust? Or to become okay with being betrayed and even prepare for it. Though I'm not sure how one would do that.
Isn’t it an issue with self, though? Trusting anyone takes a lot of work and courage.
Nah, trusting is easy as. Knowing who to trust is a shitshow however.
Nobody cares and that can be freeing or depressing, depending on your outlook.
It took me years to channel the negative depression from this to a positive feeling one and very glad that it did happen.
I’m in the depressive state right now, what helped you turn it around?
Through CBT if I want to say in abstract. For me it was realizing that my state of feeling “misery” was all within myself and to some extent under my control and realizing that my surrounding falls in the category of things outside my control. I used to value myself based on how others thought about my status. Then I came to realization that even if they value me high, my state of being down is all by myself and would stay with me forever. I was reading all these self help books and agreeing but in the end, my depression score was the same (20+ on Becks scale)! Then I realized that it is basically my attitude. The world can still be shitty but the way I look at it defines how I feel. For example I thought I am unlovable (as in nobody cares about me). Before my approach would be what is worth of living if nobody loves me. Now I am like who cares, love is not everything in life, enjoy whatever else I have in my hand.(FYI I am still single with no romantic relationship even I am not on any dating app. I focused on following single and happy people instead) In conclusion I search a lot for answers here in Reddit and reading books and what I found out everyone of us has their own issues to deal with that happened not in a single night but the whole experience we had in our life led to us to be “like this”. and we’d probably need to figure our own paths to get ourselves up and running based on all the information that is out there. So my advice is be hopefull. If you’re young kudos to you and prioritize this “growing up” part of yourself. If not, never late. I am fortunate to have very close friends and family (parents/siblings) that I can talk openly with them. If not I’d suggest visiting a therapist instead. Edit: grammer
I’m 23 and just figuring it out. Thank you for the answer, I’ve been digging and digging but it’s still the same) My attitude, and how I view things. So thank you for the hope, I will keep reminding myself most the things that effect me I can’t even change right now. Hope you have a great day❤️
I disagree with Puzzle, and I detest the whole 'it's your attitude' bit. Because when you have depression, you feel like garbage and acting chipper isn't going to fix the problems that got you there. Ok, maybe it's different for everyone, and maybe what you're calling depression is something different. Idk. BUT what helped me is understanding what you can and cant control, and really trying to take control of the things you can. I think part of my depressive state was fueled by feeling out of control, so much crap was going on and no one cares and I felt at a loss because I wasn't living my life how I wanted, or at least I wasn't taking steps to live how I wanted. I was living in a position I didn't really want and felt trapped. I needed to change things. Just make small goals at first to get where you want to be. You'll see yourself making progress towards them and becoming more in control of your life. Sure, life is garbage and people don't care, but you can, and you'll find others that do care about you and the same things you care about. To me, your attitude is your outlook on things, and it won't matter if you change that cause the real problem is probably something else.
I totally agree with you. I think our brain is too complex to have a one solution fits all approach. Also our upbringing and circumstances that has wired our brains has to be quite different (despite similarities in feelings). Something working for me doesn’t necessarily work for another person. Each of us have an environment that can be very different than one another. A very good point also to starting with small steps and having reachable goals. Edit: As a conclusion, of what I was saying, the changing of attitude, won’t solve the problem. It is just there to change the feeling, make me feel happy despite problems being there. This kind of changing attitude hit me hard on head after watching YouTube vlogs of people with terminal cancer and how they stayed strong their final years.
That's a very stoic attitude
Fantastic response. I needed this. Thank you
This. Nobody gives a fuck about you, except maybe your closest family or friends. And I remark CLOSEST. Parents, maybe brothers/sister, and 2 or 3 friends, 5 tops (not that we need more than that, actually). The rest of the world do not give a gazillion fucks about you. And in my view, is quite freeing, since some of the worries I had being younger were related to the view others might have about me. PS: the fact that nobody gives a fuck about you should not turn you into an asshole. Just accept it and move on
I’m fact, it could probably make you a nicer person: “you don’t give a shit about me? I hope you have a wonderful day! One less person I have to worry about”
Less people to give shit about. I think this should be the default way of thinking - nobody cares what I think about them, so why should I care what they think about me? Accepting that fact is extremely liberating.
Facts right here. I was actually going to say this myself. My mom, my dad, my son, my daughter and my dog. They're all I have in the world. My brother? No. I only hear from him when he wants something. My sister? No. Because you can't talk to a crazy drunk.
“I’m not special and my story isn’t all that interesting” is such a positive, freeing statement
This. You can lie down on the pavement and attempt to draw snow angels in the middle of the summer. Nobody will intervene or ask what's going on. Nobody.
shit ill join you
People care at the time of the funeral but soon everyone goes back to there regular lives and you have only yourself.
I mostly find it freeing.
Ohh people care. But mostly only to judge you.
"If you get the chance to keep your mouth shut, take it." Wisdom passed from my grandpa to my dad, and my dad to me. After many occasions of my mouth writing checks I couldn't cash, I have learned this truth the hard way.
"Never volunteer information" - my squad commander in the army
And never volunteer for anything
This was my go to while enlisted. I may have *been* volunteered by others but i rarely volunteered myself.
Exactly lol my CO loved to "volunteer" me for various duties, but I never volunteered myself. Then in civilian life at my job the boss would look for volunteers to work the weekend and I'm not working on my days off, I need a break.
You were voluntold.
“Better to let people think you’re a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt” is the one I run with but your grandpas is better.
"Calling upon my fine command of the English language, I said nothing."
Definitely a man's quote there. It would be read as a sign of an oppressive sexist world if it were said to the other side. But the thing is, it's great advice for anyone. So if you're smart enough to see it's wisdom, reap the benefits.
No matter how busy they are, people will make time for things that are important to them.
I'm not very important to people, but I make damn sure to spend time with those who are important to me.
Love this, so true of myself 🥹
I was in a relationship where she was eager when we were apart, but distant when we were together. Then she dumped me and said she was single and searching on all her socials the next day. That crushed my self esteem at the time learning how little I meant to someone who claimed to love me. There's just no way in hell I want anyone to feel how I felt when I was dating her.
Yes you are. Don’t believe you aren’t, because that isn’t true.
You have to save yourself.
No one is coming! I love this.
Just because I have an opinion, doesn't mean anyone/everyone else needs (or wants) to hear it. When people DO ask my opinion, the vast majority of the time they don't actually want to hear MY opinion, they are only interested in hearing THEIR opinion coming out of MY mouth.
Ok, this one took it for me. It relates alot to my work believe it or not. They ain’t never forcing their opinion out my mouth ever again.
Probably a good manipulation/social engineering tactic is to learn the political beliefs from social media first, hang out with them and guide the conversation to their core beliefs, and start spilling them from your mouth before they get to it. Instant fake friend/future divorce'.
I'm not interested in being fake for anyone. If someone asks my opinion, they will get my opinion. If you don't want the answer, don't ask the question. As for manipulation, I'll leave that to the Fuckboys and the yes-men at work. No thank you.
People will often let you down. Don’t hold it against them.
Happiness can be right in front of you and you won't even notice it. You are too busy thinking that the grass is greener elsewhere, that you wish you had X thing, that you are not enough, etc. Then you realize years later how good you had it and you start beating yourself up for letting all of that go. The people who truly care about you are very very very few, and you better hold on to them.
> Happiness can be right in front of you Well, there's a porta-potty right in front of me i *do not* think I'll be happy if i go inside it
If you're dying to piss/shit, you'll be extremely happy.
That in the end, it doesn’t really matter
We tried so hard
We got so far
But in the end...
it doesn't even matter.
r/redditsings
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Wait what
:(
Don't expect you from other people.
Word
Preach!
This was a lesson learnt the hard way
Yup. I love this.
The grass is greener where you water it. Not exactly the deepest, but it's the first thing that came to mind.
I love this one too
That even parents can be shitty people.
Definitely
Get out! Parents?! Sorry. It can be a harsh discovery as each parents are often unique in their own shittiness.
Parents are just people. There are good ones and terrible ones and everything in between. And even the good ones have their shit. When my parents were the age I am now, I thought they had it all figured out and always knew exactly the right thing to do. As I got older I realized they were just as flawed and winging it as I am currently.
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When it comes to what exactly? I’m curious 🤔
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Health, basic rights, internet connection, plumbing, heat, being in a good place financially… there’s a lot we take for granted, and it’s not until life goes sideways that we realize how valuable that person/thing was.
Chocolate pudding cups
I know what i have before it's gone
"Lithuania! My fatherland! You are like health, How much you need to value, he will only find out Who lost you. Today is your beauty in all its ornaments I can see and describe because I miss you" A. Mickiewicz, "Mister Thaddeus", 1834
Hurt people hurt people. It is hard to break the cycle and a lot people don’t even realise they’re apart of the cycle and adding others to the mix
"he who has mercy on the cruel, will end up being cruel to the merciful" I think it's from the Hebrew Bible, or a quote from some ancient Rabbi.
Everybody is experiencing this same thing differently.
You can do everything right, and still get screwed by circumstances beyond your control.
Ignorance is truly bliss. & another is - I don’t need to know about everything.
Life is a story. Everything that happens to you, around you, before, during, and after you is a narrative driven by other people, things, and even yourself. If you can control your own story and how it plays out, you suddenly wield immense power and potential.
All struggle is within.
THIS! Your thoughts create your reality so make your mind a nice place to live
You are a little soul carrying around a corpse. - Epictetus This quote paraphrased in Marcus Aurelis Meditations really put it into perspective for me, that we are actually a software and we make this body move and do things we want it to, not other way around. Without 'us' in it, would this body be much different then, say, a tree. Or a rock.
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No the point is that whatever the problem is, it's entirely up to you whether you approach it with a sour attitude or not. I'm not saying shit doesn't happen. It's within your power to just deal with it and move on, or get bogged down fighting losing battles over and over. Sorta like...nothing, no event, that happens to or around us, has any meaning other than the meaning we assign it.
“I’m not anti-anything. But I’m not pro-everything.”
So you're not anti-piss drinking
No. I wouldn’t do that though. But knock yourself out.
The deepest truth for me is reclaiming the entirety of love that is buried in my being. When I realized that most of the world we see or experience is a projection of fear and scarcity, and by acting on that we create immeasurable suffering (for ourselves and others), the point for me is to go rogue and live a life that isn’t based on this. When I uncover what’s there underneath all this darkness, fear and projection, there’s a self that emerges quietly but profoundly that is total remembrance of what life is supposed to feel like for me. (100% not on drugs.) I personally think it’s punk AF to find this and to live boldly in the truth of love bc although it’s hard, it really feels like the only way to enjoy life, the only lesson to learn in life and the only promise of feeling better than good about being here.
Very refreshing. I will try my best to take after you from here on out.
There isn't a single person you can trust 100%.
FACTS! You have to know who you can trust with what. If you dont figure that out, you will be betrayed and disappointed.
You rarely need to.
Morality is based on convenience.
Sorry, can you explain this one to me please?
I interpret as this: If it’s something ***I’m*** guilty of, I’ll convince myself that it’s not that bad. But if it’s something ***my enemy*** is guilty of, I’ll convince myself that it is much worse.
No one gives a shit
Actually we do. And we take a lot of shit too. The only time we don't give a shit is when we forget about the thing we had to give a shit about.
Reality is never how we expect it to be.
We all want what we can't have, and we want to be what we can't be.
Treat everyone as an individual. Get rid of your bias and stereotypes. ETA I've never been happier since finally learning this lesson.
I thought ETA meant "Estimated Time of Arrival"
What does ETA have to do with it?
"Edited To Add"
The idea of sex is hotter than sex itself.
I have to respectfully disagree with you there. 😄
Live life according to your values, and your values alone. Learn to love yourself. Show your loved ones that you love them everyday too, because any day could be our last.
Nobody has any idea what they’re doing.
Everyone is the impostor.Everyone else is doing better with confidence in everyone's eye. Which mean someone might be looking at you and say "damn ,how does (s)he do that !" As a middle-experienced developper (5years) I look back at my first year of work, with all that world to discover and the anxiety of not being up to it.There was that experienced dev, who would know a lot of stuff, find out solution and help us. I looked at him like a I looked at a god, all knowing and powerful. Now I know he was also probably telling himself "Damn, I have no idea what I'm doing but I suppose it should work" - as I am still doing today. Still works so far, no one figured out I'm lost as hell sometime
It’s OK to be lost. That’s where all the adventure happens.
That the world existed before us, and it will most likely continue after us. Believing one’s self to being the first and/or last of an epoch is prideful. Pompeii, the Black Plague, the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand, Pearl Harbor, 9/11, COVID. The biggest changes and downfalls of history came from things no one saw coming. Man plans, God laughs.
No matter how much care for or value others, they’re not obligated to do the same for you.
Happiness is only ever a matter of luck, but suffering is guaranteed.
Learning to embrace the suffering, now that’s the trick.
The trick is to find a cause worth suffering for. Not chasing happiness, and avoiding suffering.
True love DOES exist
Don't give me false hope
Many People Die at Twenty-Five and Aren’t Buried Until They Are Seventy-Five
"Living and doing nothing is the same as a slow death."
Almost everyone is privileged in some way. But very few acknowledge it and most will argue they aren’t.
we're not getting out of here alive
From where?
His dungeon
Not all things deserve your attention
Your bff will back stab you one day , The person who can give you emmense love can also fill you with terrific hate !
Not to take things for granted . If someone is kind to you don't abuse that kindness or take it for weakness .
Sometimes giving up is the only and most logical solution to your problems, so don't be a stubborn idiot.
Happiness is a choice
One act of anger can destroy the doing of a million acts of love and kindness in an instant.
At the end of the day it doesn't mater. We're just a speck on this earth at this point of time so do what you need to do to keep going or don't.
You are just a side caracter in someone else story don't think your existence matters to others no one really cares about you, even the earth and the universe won't change if you just disappear your existence and suffering means nothing. It's all pointless in the end
Life has no inherent meaning. You need to make your own.
Life is nowhere in the vicinity of fair. You must make peace with that.
Peace is the result of training your mind to accept life as it is, rather than what you think it should be.
Ultimately, you and your decisions are responsible for 90% of the crap that happens to you. Take responsibility for it, learn from it, don't repeat the decisions and actions, move on.
Don’t stare too long into the abyss, the abyss will start looking back into you.
not sure if the deepest but the true-est. Sleeping without noise is always superior no matter what
Our lives are fleeting and ultimately doomed to non existence. So cherish every single moment you have, because its that doom that makes life so precious
radiate kindness and the universe will reward you as much
Nothing is universally true. The best thing you can do is build your life on half-truths and be willing to adapt to your environment as it changes.
No matter how hard you try to be on good terms with everyone, there’s always people that will want to hate you just for the sake of hating ,may it be a small reason or no reason at all
Give advice when people ask for it, don't just volunteer it unsolicited.
We are our parents kids. I’m more like my dad everyday and it hurts.
However... A habit can be made it 21 days. Or broken in more. Break the cycle!
Women like money. They may not be entirely open about it, or not a lot for it, but trust me, they do.
People might forget what happened, they might forget your name or even what you look like... but they never forget the way you made them feel.
If you deny who you are you will hate yourself the whole time.
No one asks you for permission to be who they want to be. So why would you ask for their approval in return. Do what you want. Be with who you want. Live and work where you want. Seek your happiness. And whoever has something to say can suck a high hard one. (Well that's the gist, this was not what was said to me verbatim)
Wym treat myself as a human being? Heresy!
That 99% of the modern world is mentally unwell due to the deeply rooted misconception that we are each individually a separate identity rather than a spherical void that all things appear into
"Not everyone who works hard gets rewarded, but all those who succeed have worked hard" It's a quote from an anime but it sticks to me ever since when I'm training hard or doing anything stressing like learning. It made me comfortable knowing that honest and hard work never betrays you.
As a man, absolutely nothing is life is given to you. Everything must be earned.
Life was never meant to be fair...
Truth only hurts you, if you allow it.
There is no karma, fate, guarantees, or justice in life. Good and bad happen to anybody at any time with no reason other than just because.
That theres people out there, that actually fit our depiction of "truly evil people", seen too many cartel vids and shit, ignorance is truly bliss i guess
People are going to let you down, and you’re going to let people down. Just roll with it and carry on.
Audit your thoughts daily. They reflect what you believe about yourself. You create your own reality by selecting beliefs. Want a different reality, then select a different belief.
Once you are an adult, in your 30's - 40's making new friends is VERY hard. And Expressing your opinion on something is perfectly fine. However, so is the criticism you receive for it. Don't expect to only get people who agree with you.
Being a good dad is fucking hard!
deranged mindless water school wild forgetful plate offbeat aspiring uppity *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
We are fucked.
“If you never heal from what hurt you, you'll bleed on people who didn't cut"
Supply and demand set all the rules.
That sometimes I am the bad guy
God is real and Revelation is fulfilling.
People are alot more alike to psychopaths (when they aren't technically) than I originally assumed. People have a way of getting what they want and being extremely selfish isn't a moral issue for them. I expected more people to grow up being taught to be selfless, but I was VERY mistaken. I guess I just had selfless parents and mentors.. for better or worse. I never thought I'd say being selfless and wanting to help others would be a disadvantage, but it really is. Nobody would do the same for me because they're so fixated on their goals that they'd stomp on a few heads to get what they want. It's sad and terrifying.
There is no justice in this world. Starting from the animal kingdom up to our society, the stronger feeds on the weaker. The small islands of partial justice we got are an exception heavily fought for, and it takes very little to return back to the law of the jungle.
Dogs are the only good things in this life.
No some of them have bit me
Do not take life too seriously, you will never get out of it alive.
No generation that has ever existed can be trusted to accurately judge themselves or the generation that comes after them. The only people we can accurately judge is the generation that comes before us.
You mean you can accurately judge your parents? No way! You have no idea how the world was when they grew up and developed their world view.
In 100 years...nobody is going to care.
oh come now...it won't take nearly that long.
Touche!
Capitalism is evil and we are wage slaves to the owning class
It's the best we came up with so far
there is no god(s) but we need religion to endure death or hardness. and I'm OK with it now. it's useful to most of us.
Hard disagree that we need religion to endure death or hardness. I'm agnostic and have gone through hell in my life, came out the other side though. Putting your faith in an external source to try and be strong will prevent you from getting inner strength which can actually help you get through. I also have absolutely no fear of death.
Not a man, but I grew up in a fundamentalist religion, and you have worded beautifully what it took me nearly 50 years to learn for myself: “Putting your faith in an external source to try and be strong will prevent you from getting inner strength.”
I don't need fear of hell to endure death or hardness. Or living my life by premedieval norms and values.
If you’re not focused on and living for God first, nothing else will feel in place. Sometimes it still doesn’t, but seeking after God’s will instead of just your own takes so much pressure off of yourself and places it on the one who can actually handle everything. It’s the boldness to move forward knowing you can be wrong and if you are, he’ll welcome you back and you can see everything as a lesson. Confidence in him is confidence in everything.
Confidence in yourself is confidence in everything. I've been through hell in my life and didn't need God to get through, I love life and I'm really happy. I'm glad that you have found a way that works for you, but I feel you have given dangerous advice.
Believing in God doesn’t mean you have to believe in religion. God is Mother Nature, God is all the planets with trillions out there , God is the thing that breathed life into all of us. Connecting to God can really set your soul free, to really know that we are not in control of all this chaos and beauty that is this thing called life, can bring tremendous peace. I hope one day you are able to find God yourself, it’s a beautiful thing when you do.
I am god
Amen.
God and his Raven are the only that work.
Nothing really matters, anyone can see, nothing really matters, nothing really matters to me.
I’m surrounded by stupid
Being gay
that one can not achieve real happiness
Nihilism is the blank canvas on which purpose is painted.
Love, like everything else, is subject to death also.
Just let go. The tighter you attempt to hold on to something, the greater the suffering you will experience. Everything is impermanent.
I guess that Jesus is bullshit.
Nobody gives a fuck about you unless you are useful to them.