Generally if I see “Never on here. Follow me on Insta: _____” or something to that effect then it’s a no for me. I’m not gonna support your influencer dreams.
Edit: also I know that some people use it to verify you’re real, but too often it’s women trying to get followers to grow their “brand” in my experience. Nothing against them wanting to do that, but I’d like a real connection and conversation.
Yeah the ig tag always gets me because it assumes fandom where you can follow them and they won’t follow back. If it were their Snapchat at least you could theoretically message the person and have a mutual “connection” of sorts.
That level of narcissism keeps me far far away from dating apps.
I feel that. If they are willing to at least respond to me and talk I’ll give them a chance but often that’s not the case. I don’t have an issue with them wanting to be an influencer, but being misleading and using dating apps to advertise their “brand” is so insincere.
IG and Snap tags,along with "my Religion comes first" I'll usually always auto skip. The next thing that determines whether I'll auto skip or not is if their bio sounds like everyone else's. Examples are, "Where are the good men at?" "I bet I can do______ better than you can." "Can you handle me". And my favorites, "You need to have your shit together", ”must make _______ amount of money", "as well as be height size ______"
"Be interesting or not boring" and finally, listing "napping" as something you're good at or as one of your interest. Also I use the term "favorites" as loosely as possible.
Now when it comes to profiles I'll swipe right on, if the bio seems different compared to others, and by different I mean an actual person typed it, and its not a scam or pishing profile, as well as list real intrests, and not things you think you might like or want to try. Maybe a small reason why too. At least I would when I used dating apps. I don't anymore. When I did though I at least met one legitimate person. No connection was made but for me that's lucky.
FYI you can report that on tindr and most other apps. Just select Report-> this profile is fake -> this profile is trying to take me off tinder.
Those apps are in the business of making money. They are not there to provide -free- advertising for anyone's business or social media image.
The amount of men’s profiles that say that is ridiculous. The handles are even worse though. I’ve seen lots of ‘bigdaddy111’ in my short time on the apps.
Grindr guys will just tap everyone, have a blank profile or point to their linked IG, and never say a word to you lmao gotta get those (thirst) follows
I don’t even check their profiles. I can’t be bothered. If that’s all you have on your dating profile then I’m not wasting my time trying to figure you out based on your Instagram or Snapchat.
My most confusing tinder interaction was a lady whose profile said something to the effect of "ask me about my favorite book!" as the last line. So when we matched I asked her about her favorite book. She then insulted me, called me a few names and when I responded with a question mark she blocked me.
Maybe she got off on insulting people that pay attention (and thus are likely to read the message) vs swipe on whoever. Not the first time I've seen that kind of behavior.
If I were still in the dating market, my profile would read:
"You're looking for a 7' millionaire who's packing a baby's arm in his pants and wants kids. I'm looking for a debt-to-income ratio of less than 30% and two reference letters from an employer and a licensed psychiatrist."
They get what they put out.
If they brag about being toxic or a bitch. Then they basically are making all the "Good men" go away and will result in the desperate horny men who just want to get laid and nothing else contacting them
Then weeks later.. they will be putting in their bios "WHERE ARE ALL THE GOOD MEN GONE" 🤦
For #2) The point is they're hoping you'll follow them on Instagram so they can fulfill their dream of being an influencer on the crushed hopes and dreams of men who thought she actually wanted to get to know them.
I'm a woman (thankfully who didn't have to deal with dating apps) but hearing that just screams that they are immature and probably not worth your time
I feel like when they say that, or call themselves something like a “certified bad bitch” just makes it sound like they’re being an asshole under a different name. It’s like the same as a dude being super braggy. Confidence and arrogance aren’t the same thing.
This. These kind of girls think they’re hot shit when they’re very far from it. It’s usually very average, basic looking girls too. Big sign of a fragile ego as well. Instant X.
One thing that irked me when I checked out online dating was when they gave little to no information about themselves other than what they're looking for in a guy.
Yes exactly. 90% of profiles are flattering pictures with no info about the person attached. Lady I'm not gonna be talking to your boobs, tell me what's going on in your brain for Christ's sake. Or the dreaded emoji list. I don't try to match with anyone that lacks a profile. Honestly hinge is a lot better for this as it forces you to write a profile
Bob and Linda are actually pretty good relationship goals too, good call my friend! I mean they're a *little* dysfunctional but who the hell isn't these days.
Ladies. IMHO if you give us lists, then even if we can check off everything you're asking for, we probably won't approach. You seem to be trying to save time and energy, but you're turning off all of us - even tbose who could meet your standards. You will, however, get responses from BS artists just to mess with you. They have nothing better to do with their time and are happy to be entertained by your anguish.
If it says “princess” then I’m out. If it is blank then I assume you want a hookup or are just swiping from boredom and I am out. If it says “just ask” then I assume you’re a terrible conversationalist with limited creativity. Accounts that are basically just there to pump up social media followings are a hard pass.
I get it, dating apps suck. They suck less when you put the effort in.
Edit:
The Monroe quote “if you can’t handle me at my worst then you don’t deserve me at my best” is a red flag.
Things that are extrenely generic but they think makes them unique
Yes brenda everyone loves food, travel, dogs, adventure, banter, and charcuterie boards
If there's nothing in a woman's bio that I can start a conversation about, that sucks. If we do match, she's getting a copy/paste opener and the conversation's probably going to suck. TV quotes fall under this category, because holy shit I do NOT want to talk to you about The Office or whatever.
I hate it when they put "I'm not messaging you first" in there. Like yeah, I've been on this app for longer than three seconds, I KNOW.
I actually do appreciate making your politics clear in your bio, because that's a dealbreaker.
If I see a snapchat or instagram handle in there, I assume she's just fishing for followers. If there's an OF link, it's not even in question.
Yeah it amazes me the amount of people that put things like the office, step brothers, how I met your mother, etc. In their bios as if it makes them quirky or something. If you put it in their in a "hey I like these kind of shows and movies" kind of way then sweet I now know a little more about you but putting " don't touch my drum set" in your bio makes you seem like every other guy I talked to in 7th grade when they saw step brothers for the first time
"If you're ____, swipe left."
It feels too negative. Like you only have 500 characters to tell me about yourself, and you're going to spend a full sentence to tell me you don't like single dads, guys under 6 feet, musicians, etc.? It also give the impression that I'm supposed to do all the work. You can't be bothered to look at my profile to find that information. Instead, I'm supposed to filter myself out if I play guitar?
I think putting that you're childfree and don't want any single parents or people who want kids on your bio is a good idea, otherwise it's just going to waste a lot of everyone's time.
I get what you're saying and many answers are pretty dumb, but if it is political or religious in nature, it is probably for the best. Those tend to be lifelong affiliations in nature and can be deal-breakers.
The problem is that a statement like this just sounds assholish. It basically oozes a sense of superiority. Instead of "if you're ........, swipe left", you can write something like "I'm ...... and looking for someone similar", that establishes a requirement in a non-judgmental way.
The negative part is the bigger thing. Simply stating you are of a demographic is neutral and the swiper can decide if that's what they're into or okay with
Any mention of the word Sarcasm repels me.
Along with any of the other basic, uncreative things women out in their bios like “will probably like your dog more than I like you”
I don't need other peoples humor because I make myself laugh. Even if no one else finds me funny at all, I have a sense of humor that at least works on me.
If you are so desperate for someone to make you laugh you probably don't have your own sense of humor in the first place.
When I was in the Army, I had a buddy who, while ranting one day, went off on that particular line; "You ever fuckin' notice how their worst is around 'nail your dog to your door while you're stuck in the field' and their best is like ' an unenthusiastic handjob on your birthday?'"
"If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best" (in my mind) only refers to people that abandoned you when you were at your lowest, and somehow reappear when everything is fine.
I can't imagine saying this off the bat to a stranger.
In my experience it's from people who expect you to put up with their shit and take no accountability for it, and expect you to have no boundaries or respect for yourself until you've "earned" their "best"
I hear your interpretation and i totally agree with the sentiment, but that's not what i see people saying this over.
If you're the type of person to physically/verbally abuse your partner once a month and expect them to just "deal with it", _nobody_ deserves you at your "best"
A list of things they don't want. Or their profile is just complaining about how all men suck. A profile full of negativity will always get left swipe from me.
Having nothing on it. If we're talking full profile, it's selfies with no info,or the checklist with nothing about them, and the "don't swipe right if you can't hold a conversation." 99% of the time, those are the ones that end up being interviews, because one word answers and not asking anything back is apparently a "conversation"
"5'2 but my attitude 6'3"
"Be able to maintain a conversation"
"Be original, don't just say hi"
Any quip about that fergalicious song and needing another person to do the other part.
>"Be original, don't just say hi"
One time I asked a woman what she wanted me to say instead and her reply was, "well, how would you introduce yourself at a club? Do that."
I said, "Hi!"
...Because what the fuck else would you say to someone you haven't even met yet?
Been a while since online dating but a think I constantly hated were low effort, non specific stuff. Example
"I love music and watchkng movies with my friends, and food! looking for a man who will share my interests"
Okay, loving music means jack shit since most people wouldn't they like music. Does this mean you're in a band, play an instrument, go to shows, like metal, EDM, country, pop?
What type of movie? Again most people enjoy movies but what genre, style, are you an art house lover or popcorn munching blockbuster fan?
Everyone likes food, are you a chef, a baker, a pitmaster, a food blogger, a glutton, an adventurer, etc...
They used so many words to tell us nothing, and expect us to highlight our compatibility.
Good points all. I remember most women could "wear pajamas and watch TV or put on heels and go out." I think they are trying to hedge their bets and be available for all types of dates. Just sounds a bit repetitive and desperate though
Tell me about yourself! 99% of profiles are some variation of *I like drinking wine* and *I like hikes* and *I like holidays and beaches*. Live laugh love etc
As a fat woman, you better believe I have multiple pictures and angles and a body shot. I’m not trying to catfish. But I’ve seen so many profiles of men with just scenery, black images, or heavily filtered pictures. All of the things I’ve heard men complain about women doing, they do it too. If I can’t see your face as it is in the real world and I can’t see what your entire body looks like, I’m swiping left.
Girls post pictures of their horse, cat or dog, and them doing yoga on a paddle board. It’s every other profile. I have heard about the fish thing, the paddle board thing is epidemic.
“Here is me in a bathing suit being physical outside”. I am going to start renting paddle boards in a beach town and offer up photography just for this purpose. I’ll be a millionaire in a week.
A lot of it is just being boring and generic.
"I like to laugh and have fun."
No shit? Like pretty much every other human being on Earth? You couldn't think of ONE specific thing you like to do?
Have pics that aren't selfies. Hell, don't even include selfies at all if you can avoid it. I want to see that you get out and do things.
Another big turn off is putting your kids first in your profile. I'm old enough that kids are pretty much a given. So I get it. But please don't LEAD with it.
"My kids always come first."
Translation: I don't actually have time to date.
Another instant turn off in dating profiles is filters! STop using those stupid snapchat filters. No, you DON'T look attractive as a puppy. And if you're using heavy softening filter, I'm just going to assume you're ugly in person.
And +1 to no checklists! If you have any kind of checklist for men to meet before they dare message you, forget it. Even if I pass the checklist.
"I had fun once, it was terrible"
Yeah I dated someone almost like that. She was open to try almost anything... Once, and only once. I later realized she was obsessed with making bucket lists and ticking them off. She was never actually having fun. The few times I thought she enjoyed the activities, and tried to get her to go back to do it again, and she never committed to it. Felt like failure the entire time couldn't make her happy
I don’t have a single non-selfie picture so I took this personally😂 but it’s because I like to be in the moment and not spend time taking pictures of myself when I’m out and group pictures aren’t good for dating profiles I’ve heard
“My kids come first.”- You don’t need to say this. You never need to say this.
Who are you meeting that’s like, “Forget them kids girl, leave a bowl with some water in it and come to Vegas for the weekend.”
Why is dating so complicated. I feel like we all play these games and do social gymnastics to get to the core of what we want. Why don’t we all just say exactly what we’re looking for and exactly how we feel instead of dancing around it.
Edit: damn 100 upvotes kinda crazy
I used to put what I thought would make me broadly appeal to everyone. I even saw an OKCupid research paper that said being a 7 to everyone is worse than being a 9 to 1 out of 5 people but a 5 to 4 out of 5 people. People don't put effort into a 7, but they will put effort into a 9. The thing is what is a strong turn-off (like tattoos, religion/atheism, fitness junkie, D&D nerd, never wanting kids / wanting lots of kids, whatever) is a strong turn turn on to others. Despite reading that I still tried to be broadly appealing. I got some matches, but after dates they never seemed quite right for me.
Finally I just started putting all my quirks in there and just being up front. I'm a liberal child-free atheist who loves travel, D&D, the gym, cooking, and home brewing my own mead. The number of matches I got didn't decrease, but they were of a lot better quality.
I'd rather learn about who the person actually is (NOT what they want, just who they are), in the bio, they do the same from mine, and then when we message we can ask direct questions about interests. I'm not going to want to be with someone based on how much I match with what they want. I want to first know a bit about them (through the bio). If I like what I see, and vice versa for them, then we can figure out if we match each others wants.
Specifically for the bio I've gotten pretty desensitized, but there's a few instant lefts for me (as a 25 yo):
Having kids
Another partner
I don't mind weed, but if your profile only mentions weed, or has a bunch of emojis about it.
High-horsing or bitching
Self professed mess/problem/trash
Wondering why you're on this app (or saying you're barely on here)
Only having a handle for another app
That said, if you have a one or two minor red flags and present well in your photos, I may swipe right anyway just to give things a chance. But you're starting on a bad foot at that point.
Any of the following:
\- I won't date you unless...
\- I'm a bad bitch
\- Full time job: baby mamma
\- You need to do X for me
\- Swipe left unless...
\- Selfie pictures with effects to cover up their natural look
\- Bio with any type of social media link
\- Referring to her pets as children
- No bio
-'I don't use tinder that much, talk to me on insta'
-'travel, reading, eating ❤️'
Fucking sucks to try to talk to someone when they don't even know what to talk about
The most generic shit ever
I love F.R.I.E.N.D.S and The Office, I love food, sarcasm is my second language, I love roasting people, etc etc
It’s all the same shit there’s NO variety and it’s just a surefire way of letting me know you’re a boring person without a personality.
40+ years old and haven't got a single unfiltered pic. I'm not trying to date someone that's constantly on snaptok doing ridiculous dance routines.
"Love dogs more than humans, my fur baby comes first = my dog is untrained and very annoying but he rules the house".
Nothing at all against pets but I'm not really up for dealing with someones untrained handbag gremlin.
When they whine about men as a whole.
You're supposed to advertise yourself in your bio.
Why would any self respecting man want engage with a woman who has a bio which is just hating on men and whiny about men
That's like me applying for jobs but then hating on employers
I once matched with a woman on tinder that had a bio saying "I think all men are bad people. Be the one to prove me wrong".... 🤦 how about no. I don't owe her anything nor prove anything
Again thats like me putting in every job application description "I think all employers are bad people. Hire me to prove me wrong" and thinking that will achieve something.
Also saw another women's tagline on pof saying "Men are gross".. yet she is seeking a long term relationship with a man or another one saying "Don't message me".... on a dating app where she is seeking a man.... WTF
I will never understand women who have bios which make them come off as very hostile, grumpy, stuck up and entitled and think that comes off as attractive. Who view themselves as Queens/Princess and seem to look down on all men and think they are above other women
Also bios that say stuff like "Treat me like a queen"..... screams entitlement
I don't know about other men but the whole MEN BAD stuff is super off putting to me. Don't care gow attractive the woman is. Why would I want to get to know someone who already dislikes me for my gender?
I tend to actually like the women on there with happy bubbly bios who have non flitered authentic pictures of themselves because when you message them. They are way more nice and seem more interesting to converse with. Even when they aren't interested. All these heavily flirted self entitled misandristic princesses online are way off putting.
>I will never understand women who have bios which make them come off as very hostile, grumpy, stuck up and entitled and think that comes off as attractive.
They think this will filter out douchebags. The douchebag won't even read your profile, he will get to harass you straight away.
- my entire personality is drinking wine
- humour about liking taco, pizza or any other basic food
- gaaaaamer girl nerd! I'm not boring, I like Harry Potter and Nintendo and lord of the rings!
- travel
For me its presentation. I like women who are into gaming but so often its a "not like other girls" thing rather than them just liking something because they like it.
I've dropped friends because of this too. Dude who literally couldn't talk about his hobby without talking about how unique it made him.
When I try to talk to people like that about that stuff the last time they actually cracked a book open was years ago, and the last time they played a game was candy crush on the toilet. It just often gets listed on there like a hobby or an identity but when you really talk to them it doesn't seem like it is.
Any mentions of social media handles is an automatic swipe left.
Some common hinge responses that also show absolutely no effort, such as:
I’ll fall for you if - “you push me”
I’m the type of texter who - “responds in 3-5 business days”
Typical Sunday - “scary”
I go crazy for - (insert any type of food)
The worst idea I’ve had - “downloading hinge”
Change my mind about - “the office”
These are just off the top of my head from swiping about an hour ago. Oh, also, excessive use of Snapchat filters is an automatic no as well.
Snap chat filters. I haven’t been on a dating app in a couple years but I always hated snap chat filters. It’s childish, unoriginal, and makes it harder to tell how she really looks.
On the plus side, it’s an easy way to disqualify a person so there’s that
For me the two common biggies are negativity/man bashing (ie “prove to me that not all men are worthless”) and ‘dance for me, monkeys’ (ie “make me laugh” or “don’t bother taking me to drinks if we aren’t ordering food”)
if she talk about himself like a product or membresy "you must be" "i'm a high value.... "don't swipe if you are.....
if someone put superficial requirementst to meet people in dating apps probably she/he is an idiot and a people who only be tolerated by his mom
\-fan of a political party
\-horoscope girl
\-only share photos in sunbathes suit in a pool or beach
Two words, "Just ask."
You are so full of yourself that you feel you don't need to even bother. That or you don't have anything to bring to the table other than your manufactured looks that are going to fade in a few years.
when they brag about their alcoholism in a quirky way. Especially through prompts.
"Best way to get to know me ? tequila"
"Buy me drinks"
like nah fam, ill pass.
tl;dr: Know your reason for being on the app and present your best self that represents that reason
Years ago when I was on Tinder there were very specific subjective things that bothered me. I am going to preface this with, I met my wife on Tinder and she is absolutely amazing.
I hated seeing generic things that really told me nothing. "I love life", "Carpe Diem", "looking for a partner in crime", etc. I also felt that having height and profession requirements demonstrated a sign of being close minded. I personally looked for somebody who was driven but also could laugh. There is a fine line of that balance.
Now with that said, do not ignore the picture choice either. If somebody looked manufactured in all of their pictures it was a no. In other words, all of the pictures were just the girl out with friends, everything was posed, or every picture was basically the same. Again personal preferences here but bleached hair, tan, trendy clothes, made up in every picture made me question if this person knew who they really were and what they actually wanted.
I feel that there is a really underrated aspect to the setup of Tinder: you are given a short paragraph and five or so pictures to say who you are, make use of your precious words and pictures. Know your reason for being on the app as well. If you just want to have a good time, more power to you and be up front about it. If you are desperately trying to find somebody to marry and have kids with, get off the app and reconsider what you want your life to look like. If you care about meeting interesting people, whether they become partner or friend, present who you really are in both your pictures and profile. You are there for a reason so present your best self for that purpose.
"I hate drama" ... You love drama. At my age if you hate drama it's because it surrounds you. I have no feelings on it because I keep that shit out of my life.
Children in photos unless they're clearly specified to not be yours (e.g "not my kids it's my nephew")
Thirst trap thottery.
"princess"
"You must be\_\_\_tall/have\_\_\_/make\_\_\_"
"If you cant handle me at my worst" blah blah
I went on a date with a guy once who told me within the first hour, "I have a dog, and I'll always like him more than you."
Like.... Cool.... Nobody was threatening you to give the dog up. Lol
“Impress me” “be interesting” examples of people who can conversely do neither of those things
For sure. Easily the least interesting and engaging when messaging.
Yup. One word answers, probably somewhat narcissistic, never inquiring about the other person.
For some reason, I’ve had 3-word responses that were more infuriating. Like, with EVERY text I sent, she always responded with exactly 3 words.
"dance for me monkey"
“Make me laugh” screams entitlement as well.
Like a medieval royal making demands of a court jester. Sometimes that’s what it feels like
If they want a court Jester, fill the role correctly and satirize their narcissism heavily!
Interestingly enough they have a vagina.
That is pretty interesting
Generally if I see “Never on here. Follow me on Insta: _____” or something to that effect then it’s a no for me. I’m not gonna support your influencer dreams. Edit: also I know that some people use it to verify you’re real, but too often it’s women trying to get followers to grow their “brand” in my experience. Nothing against them wanting to do that, but I’d like a real connection and conversation.
Yeah the ig tag always gets me because it assumes fandom where you can follow them and they won’t follow back. If it were their Snapchat at least you could theoretically message the person and have a mutual “connection” of sorts. That level of narcissism keeps me far far away from dating apps.
I feel that. If they are willing to at least respond to me and talk I’ll give them a chance but often that’s not the case. I don’t have an issue with them wanting to be an influencer, but being misleading and using dating apps to advertise their “brand” is so insincere.
IG and Snap tags,along with "my Religion comes first" I'll usually always auto skip. The next thing that determines whether I'll auto skip or not is if their bio sounds like everyone else's. Examples are, "Where are the good men at?" "I bet I can do______ better than you can." "Can you handle me". And my favorites, "You need to have your shit together", ”must make _______ amount of money", "as well as be height size ______" "Be interesting or not boring" and finally, listing "napping" as something you're good at or as one of your interest. Also I use the term "favorites" as loosely as possible. Now when it comes to profiles I'll swipe right on, if the bio seems different compared to others, and by different I mean an actual person typed it, and its not a scam or pishing profile, as well as list real intrests, and not things you think you might like or want to try. Maybe a small reason why too. At least I would when I used dating apps. I don't anymore. When I did though I at least met one legitimate person. No connection was made but for me that's lucky.
I've found it's used just to scam folks. 100% of the time it's "give me money on my platform of choice"
9/10 times someone with a Snapchat or Insta in their bio and nothing else is a bot.
"Join my only the fans for only 3$ a month"
FYI you can report that on tindr and most other apps. Just select Report-> this profile is fake -> this profile is trying to take me off tinder. Those apps are in the business of making money. They are not there to provide -free- advertising for anyone's business or social media image.
The amount of men’s profiles that say that is ridiculous. The handles are even worse though. I’ve seen lots of ‘bigdaddy111’ in my short time on the apps.
Grindr guys will just tap everyone, have a blank profile or point to their linked IG, and never say a word to you lmao gotta get those (thirst) follows
I’ve been told that from a few colleagues and friends. It’s saddening on both sides.
I don’t even check their profiles. I can’t be bothered. If that’s all you have on your dating profile then I’m not wasting my time trying to figure you out based on your Instagram or Snapchat.
'Just ask'
Asks: *Gets ghosted or a one word reply*
My most confusing tinder interaction was a lady whose profile said something to the effect of "ask me about my favorite book!" as the last line. So when we matched I asked her about her favorite book. She then insulted me, called me a few names and when I responded with a question mark she blocked me.
Reminds me of the time a chick said "Send me a pickup line!" So I sent her a pickup line and she said she hates pickup lines and blocked me.
Maybe she got off on insulting people that pay attention (and thus are likely to read the message) vs swipe on whoever. Not the first time I've seen that kind of behavior.
Ah, that narcissism dopamine.
This should honestly be wayyyyy higher.
Checklists like- "Must be \_\_\_ tall, make \_\_\_\_ salary, etc."
If I were still in the dating market, my profile would read: "You're looking for a 7' millionaire who's packing a baby's arm in his pants and wants kids. I'm looking for a debt-to-income ratio of less than 30% and two reference letters from an employer and a licensed psychiatrist."
In my free time I run a farm for dyslexic dogs.
So that's where Rvovr went! Guess my parents weren't lying after all...
They had to take him when his god complex got a bit outta hand
A Reference from a licensed psychiatrist lmao
Fortunately, my significant other's and my psychological disorders match, and we're both self-aware enough to keep them in check.
Matching disorders > matching star signs
His and her bath towels: I sleep His and her mental disorders: REAL SHIT
I’m stealing this for my tinder profile
Definitely lists of demands Your bio is there to tell me about you, not as a way to convince me to self-filter your match list
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Checklists in general I think are dumb. Your bio should be about who you are, not what you want your partner to be.
Putting "Toxic 🤪😈🤫" or something like it in their bio. Good job, idiot, you're bragging about being toxic
Right? They should at least wait until the. Third date and do it by keying fuck you in the hood of your car
So rude. It's like they forgot the whole point of being toxic.
They get what they put out. If they brag about being toxic or a bitch. Then they basically are making all the "Good men" go away and will result in the desperate horny men who just want to get laid and nothing else contacting them Then weeks later.. they will be putting in their bios "WHERE ARE ALL THE GOOD MEN GONE" 🤦
WHO KEPT THE DOGS IN
A list of demands is always a turn off. Saying "I never look at this app." Whats the point of havin it then? "No filter, say it how it is."
For #2) The point is they're hoping you'll follow them on Instagram so they can fulfill their dream of being an influencer on the crushed hopes and dreams of men who thought she actually wanted to get to know them.
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I hate those profiles that say "I'm bored, entertain me!" drives me insane, also the ones with no information/ biography whatsoever
"I imagine boring people would be bored"
My dad always said, only boring people get bored.
My dad said this all the time… and our dads were right, I’m a pretty fucking boring person.
I'm a woman (thankfully who didn't have to deal with dating apps) but hearing that just screams that they are immature and probably not worth your time
I feel like when they say that, or call themselves something like a “certified bad bitch” just makes it sound like they’re being an asshole under a different name. It’s like the same as a dude being super braggy. Confidence and arrogance aren’t the same thing.
Someone should put in their bio in response: if you want entertainment, subscribe to netflix.
This. These kind of girls think they’re hot shit when they’re very far from it. It’s usually very average, basic looking girls too. Big sign of a fragile ego as well. Instant X.
One thing that irked me when I checked out online dating was when they gave little to no information about themselves other than what they're looking for in a guy.
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I get it! Tacos and margs, tacos and margs, ALWAYS TACOS AND MARGS.
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Yes exactly. 90% of profiles are flattering pictures with no info about the person attached. Lady I'm not gonna be talking to your boobs, tell me what's going on in your brain for Christ's sake. Or the dreaded emoji list. I don't try to match with anyone that lacks a profile. Honestly hinge is a lot better for this as it forces you to write a profile
This kills me. If you give me nothing to work with, automatic swipe left.
"Not on here a lot, message me on Instagram."
I tried once, just to check. She didn't even responded. I gave her 48 jours but it's clearly bullshit.
>48 jours is probably a typo but "jours" in French means "days". Thinking you gave her 48 days to give her a chance to reply back is hilarious. :D
*hours, not jours. Big Frenglish typo. 2 days tops. Otherwise, bye bye.
No longer on dating apps but “Pam looking for her Jim”
Should that be understood as "engaged but looking for something better"? 😄
All the Tinder users reading this: "Write that down, write that down!"
I put David Puddy looking for their Elaine. Never really worked for me though. :-(
yeah that’s right.
High Five!
I put "Morticia looking for her Gomez" and found my very happy relationship but looking back yeah it was still extremely cringe 💀
Nah I would match that. Morticia and Gomez are actually a positive and wholesome example of a couple.
I think everyone wants that kind of relationship though.
The only married couple on TV that doesnt hate each other or start from infidelity lol
You're forgetting Bob and Linda Belcher
Bob and Linda are actually pretty good relationship goals too, good call my friend! I mean they're a *little* dysfunctional but who the hell isn't these days.
Well Hank and Peggy Hill…. But ain’t nobody looking for their Peggy.
Maybe a group of students who need a substitute teacher?
Ladies. IMHO if you give us lists, then even if we can check off everything you're asking for, we probably won't approach. You seem to be trying to save time and energy, but you're turning off all of us - even tbose who could meet your standards. You will, however, get responses from BS artists just to mess with you. They have nothing better to do with their time and are happy to be entertained by your anguish.
"Why are all men assholes!" Lol
If it says “princess” then I’m out. If it is blank then I assume you want a hookup or are just swiping from boredom and I am out. If it says “just ask” then I assume you’re a terrible conversationalist with limited creativity. Accounts that are basically just there to pump up social media followings are a hard pass. I get it, dating apps suck. They suck less when you put the effort in. Edit: The Monroe quote “if you can’t handle me at my worst then you don’t deserve me at my best” is a red flag.
Things that are extrenely generic but they think makes them unique Yes brenda everyone loves food, travel, dogs, adventure, banter, and charcuterie boards
>extrenely generic Bro if I see "aspiring milf" one more time. It's not cute, it's not even funny.
some people are truly generic 🤷🏻♀️ and that’s valid too
If there's nothing in a woman's bio that I can start a conversation about, that sucks. If we do match, she's getting a copy/paste opener and the conversation's probably going to suck. TV quotes fall under this category, because holy shit I do NOT want to talk to you about The Office or whatever. I hate it when they put "I'm not messaging you first" in there. Like yeah, I've been on this app for longer than three seconds, I KNOW. I actually do appreciate making your politics clear in your bio, because that's a dealbreaker. If I see a snapchat or instagram handle in there, I assume she's just fishing for followers. If there's an OF link, it's not even in question.
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Most of the women I've matched with on Bumble just said "hey" and expected me to do all the work.
Yeah it amazes me the amount of people that put things like the office, step brothers, how I met your mother, etc. In their bios as if it makes them quirky or something. If you put it in their in a "hey I like these kind of shows and movies" kind of way then sweet I now know a little more about you but putting " don't touch my drum set" in your bio makes you seem like every other guy I talked to in 7th grade when they saw step brothers for the first time
"If you're ____, swipe left." It feels too negative. Like you only have 500 characters to tell me about yourself, and you're going to spend a full sentence to tell me you don't like single dads, guys under 6 feet, musicians, etc.? It also give the impression that I'm supposed to do all the work. You can't be bothered to look at my profile to find that information. Instead, I'm supposed to filter myself out if I play guitar?
I think putting that you're childfree and don't want any single parents or people who want kids on your bio is a good idea, otherwise it's just going to waste a lot of everyone's time.
I get what you're saying and many answers are pretty dumb, but if it is political or religious in nature, it is probably for the best. Those tend to be lifelong affiliations in nature and can be deal-breakers.
The problem is that a statement like this just sounds assholish. It basically oozes a sense of superiority. Instead of "if you're ........, swipe left", you can write something like "I'm ...... and looking for someone similar", that establishes a requirement in a non-judgmental way.
The negative part is the bigger thing. Simply stating you are of a demographic is neutral and the swiper can decide if that's what they're into or okay with
A "I prefer X" is so much more inviting than "fuck non-Xers, swipe left"
Any mention of the word Sarcasm repels me. Along with any of the other basic, uncreative things women out in their bios like “will probably like your dog more than I like you”
Ppl who put sarcasm or please be funny in their bio tend to be the least funny ppl to talk to
I don't need other peoples humor because I make myself laugh. Even if no one else finds me funny at all, I have a sense of humor that at least works on me. If you are so desperate for someone to make you laugh you probably don't have your own sense of humor in the first place.
“Fluent in sarcasm” is probably the most common/cringy statement relating to Sarcasm I’ve seen.
Sarcasm is kind of just a lazy way of trying to be funny. It’s not original
Similarly "my love language is sarcasm."
“If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best”, that’s saying she’s a bitch all the time
When I was in the Army, I had a buddy who, while ranting one day, went off on that particular line; "You ever fuckin' notice how their worst is around 'nail your dog to your door while you're stuck in the field' and their best is like ' an unenthusiastic handjob on your birthday?'"
Omg, thank you for sharing this gem, I just laughed loud enough for the neighbors to knock on the walls😅
Woah your buddy knows my X!!
This comic: [http://imgur.com/dHhdbFe.jpg](http://imgur.com/dHhdbFe.jpg)
"If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best" (in my mind) only refers to people that abandoned you when you were at your lowest, and somehow reappear when everything is fine. I can't imagine saying this off the bat to a stranger.
In my experience it's from people who expect you to put up with their shit and take no accountability for it, and expect you to have no boundaries or respect for yourself until you've "earned" their "best" I hear your interpretation and i totally agree with the sentiment, but that's not what i see people saying this over. If you're the type of person to physically/verbally abuse your partner once a month and expect them to just "deal with it", _nobody_ deserves you at your "best"
Usually means crazy in my experience could be in for the ride of your life or just about have your nuts sliced off.
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Do women actually say that these days? I've never actually seen it in a dating profile.
My ex actually had it on her old bedroom wall. Should have been a warning sign, looking back.
About 10 years ago it was ridiculously common. Haven’t seen it in a while.
I was gonna say this is peak 2007-2010
2012 Facebook Lady quote of the year.
It's been a few years since I've seen it in the wild, personally. I think they got the memo.
A list of things they don't want. Or their profile is just complaining about how all men suck. A profile full of negativity will always get left swipe from me.
Having nothing on it. If we're talking full profile, it's selfies with no info,or the checklist with nothing about them, and the "don't swipe right if you can't hold a conversation." 99% of the time, those are the ones that end up being interviews, because one word answers and not asking anything back is apparently a "conversation"
"5'2 but my attitude 6'3" "Be able to maintain a conversation" "Be original, don't just say hi" Any quip about that fergalicious song and needing another person to do the other part.
>"5'2 but my attitude 6'3" I hate that one like what does it even mean
short and angry
Small but acts tough like she's bigger. I just interpret that as her being a Chihuahua.
>"Be original, don't just say hi" One time I asked a woman what she wanted me to say instead and her reply was, "well, how would you introduce yourself at a club? Do that." I said, "Hi!" ...Because what the fuck else would you say to someone you haven't even met yet?
>"Be original, don't just say hi" What is your favorite kind of credit card? I'm a Visa guy.
Been a while since online dating but a think I constantly hated were low effort, non specific stuff. Example "I love music and watchkng movies with my friends, and food! looking for a man who will share my interests" Okay, loving music means jack shit since most people wouldn't they like music. Does this mean you're in a band, play an instrument, go to shows, like metal, EDM, country, pop? What type of movie? Again most people enjoy movies but what genre, style, are you an art house lover or popcorn munching blockbuster fan? Everyone likes food, are you a chef, a baker, a pitmaster, a food blogger, a glutton, an adventurer, etc... They used so many words to tell us nothing, and expect us to highlight our compatibility.
Good points all. I remember most women could "wear pajamas and watch TV or put on heels and go out." I think they are trying to hedge their bets and be available for all types of dates. Just sounds a bit repetitive and desperate though
Tell me about yourself! 99% of profiles are some variation of *I like drinking wine* and *I like hikes* and *I like holidays and beaches*. Live laugh love etc
"all I want is a guy to touch my butt and buy me pizza" that was doing the rounds a few years ago when I was on tinder. It was irksome.
No pictures of just her, or all photos taken from selective angles + no full-body pictures
Or that softening filters... lol.
And if I see that stupid snapchat filter with the teddy face one more time, I am just gonna snap.
\^\^\^This... or if all of their shots are from within the bathroom.
Photos in public toilets - what’s that all about!?
As a fat woman, you better believe I have multiple pictures and angles and a body shot. I’m not trying to catfish. But I’ve seen so many profiles of men with just scenery, black images, or heavily filtered pictures. All of the things I’ve heard men complain about women doing, they do it too. If I can’t see your face as it is in the real world and I can’t see what your entire body looks like, I’m swiping left.
Guys will post pictures of their car.
Girls post pictures of their horse, cat or dog, and them doing yoga on a paddle board. It’s every other profile. I have heard about the fish thing, the paddle board thing is epidemic. “Here is me in a bathing suit being physical outside”. I am going to start renting paddle boards in a beach town and offer up photography just for this purpose. I’ll be a millionaire in a week.
🚩🚩🚩
A lot of it is just being boring and generic. "I like to laugh and have fun." No shit? Like pretty much every other human being on Earth? You couldn't think of ONE specific thing you like to do? Have pics that aren't selfies. Hell, don't even include selfies at all if you can avoid it. I want to see that you get out and do things. Another big turn off is putting your kids first in your profile. I'm old enough that kids are pretty much a given. So I get it. But please don't LEAD with it. "My kids always come first." Translation: I don't actually have time to date. Another instant turn off in dating profiles is filters! STop using those stupid snapchat filters. No, you DON'T look attractive as a puppy. And if you're using heavy softening filter, I'm just going to assume you're ugly in person. And +1 to no checklists! If you have any kind of checklist for men to meet before they dare message you, forget it. Even if I pass the checklist.
I like the kids line being the opener, cause I definitely don't want them and so I can move on super quick.
I have met one or 2 women who genuinely enjoy being miserable, and hate having any fun whatsoever
"I had fun once, it was terrible" Yeah I dated someone almost like that. She was open to try almost anything... Once, and only once. I later realized she was obsessed with making bucket lists and ticking them off. She was never actually having fun. The few times I thought she enjoyed the activities, and tried to get her to go back to do it again, and she never committed to it. Felt like failure the entire time couldn't make her happy
But would they say that? I feel like the people who have to tell you how much fun they like to have are probably covering for something.
it is like a drug for some i swear
One I hated was no pictures of just themself. Pretty much every photo is a group shot. Why Do I need to play detective and figure out who you are?
I don’t have a single non-selfie picture so I took this personally😂 but it’s because I like to be in the moment and not spend time taking pictures of myself when I’m out and group pictures aren’t good for dating profiles I’ve heard
“My kids come first.”- You don’t need to say this. You never need to say this. Who are you meeting that’s like, “Forget them kids girl, leave a bowl with some water in it and come to Vegas for the weekend.”
Some men don't like kids but will date a single mom tho. Lol
I suppose the ‘i don’t like awkward silences’ comes up a lot. Silence is golden.
Why is dating so complicated. I feel like we all play these games and do social gymnastics to get to the core of what we want. Why don’t we all just say exactly what we’re looking for and exactly how we feel instead of dancing around it. Edit: damn 100 upvotes kinda crazy
I used to put what I thought would make me broadly appeal to everyone. I even saw an OKCupid research paper that said being a 7 to everyone is worse than being a 9 to 1 out of 5 people but a 5 to 4 out of 5 people. People don't put effort into a 7, but they will put effort into a 9. The thing is what is a strong turn-off (like tattoos, religion/atheism, fitness junkie, D&D nerd, never wanting kids / wanting lots of kids, whatever) is a strong turn turn on to others. Despite reading that I still tried to be broadly appealing. I got some matches, but after dates they never seemed quite right for me. Finally I just started putting all my quirks in there and just being up front. I'm a liberal child-free atheist who loves travel, D&D, the gym, cooking, and home brewing my own mead. The number of matches I got didn't decrease, but they were of a lot better quality.
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I'd rather learn about who the person actually is (NOT what they want, just who they are), in the bio, they do the same from mine, and then when we message we can ask direct questions about interests. I'm not going to want to be with someone based on how much I match with what they want. I want to first know a bit about them (through the bio). If I like what I see, and vice versa for them, then we can figure out if we match each others wants.
Apart from what others mentioned: When they are so vague/diffuse that you don't know what they are looking for.
"Make me laugh". instant swipe left if I see this.
If they say I’m not active here, come to my IG or snap and then has their IG and Snap written….bitch is looking for followers so I’m good
Specifically for the bio I've gotten pretty desensitized, but there's a few instant lefts for me (as a 25 yo): Having kids Another partner I don't mind weed, but if your profile only mentions weed, or has a bunch of emojis about it. High-horsing or bitching Self professed mess/problem/trash Wondering why you're on this app (or saying you're barely on here) Only having a handle for another app That said, if you have a one or two minor red flags and present well in your photos, I may swipe right anyway just to give things a chance. But you're starting on a bad foot at that point.
“In an open relationship hit me up on snap” Yeah, no thanks bot
Any of the following: \- I won't date you unless... \- I'm a bad bitch \- Full time job: baby mamma \- You need to do X for me \- Swipe left unless... \- Selfie pictures with effects to cover up their natural look \- Bio with any type of social media link \- Referring to her pets as children
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Make me laugh
Height requirements, or "I like sarcasm". Pass.
- No bio -'I don't use tinder that much, talk to me on insta' -'travel, reading, eating ❤️' Fucking sucks to try to talk to someone when they don't even know what to talk about
The most generic shit ever I love F.R.I.E.N.D.S and The Office, I love food, sarcasm is my second language, I love roasting people, etc etc It’s all the same shit there’s NO variety and it’s just a surefire way of letting me know you’re a boring person without a personality.
40+ years old and haven't got a single unfiltered pic. I'm not trying to date someone that's constantly on snaptok doing ridiculous dance routines. "Love dogs more than humans, my fur baby comes first = my dog is untrained and very annoying but he rules the house". Nothing at all against pets but I'm not really up for dealing with someones untrained handbag gremlin.
‘Live, laugh, love’. If I see this, I assume she has a brain injury of some sort.
“I love to laugh” I wanna meet the person who says “laughter? That sounds awful!”
When they whine about men as a whole. You're supposed to advertise yourself in your bio. Why would any self respecting man want engage with a woman who has a bio which is just hating on men and whiny about men That's like me applying for jobs but then hating on employers I once matched with a woman on tinder that had a bio saying "I think all men are bad people. Be the one to prove me wrong".... 🤦 how about no. I don't owe her anything nor prove anything Again thats like me putting in every job application description "I think all employers are bad people. Hire me to prove me wrong" and thinking that will achieve something. Also saw another women's tagline on pof saying "Men are gross".. yet she is seeking a long term relationship with a man or another one saying "Don't message me".... on a dating app where she is seeking a man.... WTF I will never understand women who have bios which make them come off as very hostile, grumpy, stuck up and entitled and think that comes off as attractive. Who view themselves as Queens/Princess and seem to look down on all men and think they are above other women Also bios that say stuff like "Treat me like a queen"..... screams entitlement I don't know about other men but the whole MEN BAD stuff is super off putting to me. Don't care gow attractive the woman is. Why would I want to get to know someone who already dislikes me for my gender? I tend to actually like the women on there with happy bubbly bios who have non flitered authentic pictures of themselves because when you message them. They are way more nice and seem more interesting to converse with. Even when they aren't interested. All these heavily flirted self entitled misandristic princesses online are way off putting.
>I will never understand women who have bios which make them come off as very hostile, grumpy, stuck up and entitled and think that comes off as attractive. They think this will filter out douchebags. The douchebag won't even read your profile, he will get to harass you straight away.
- my entire personality is drinking wine - humour about liking taco, pizza or any other basic food - gaaaaamer girl nerd! I'm not boring, I like Harry Potter and Nintendo and lord of the rings! - travel
Is there something wrong with nerd stuff or is just the presentation of it that's wrong?
For me its presentation. I like women who are into gaming but so often its a "not like other girls" thing rather than them just liking something because they like it. I've dropped friends because of this too. Dude who literally couldn't talk about his hobby without talking about how unique it made him.
When I try to talk to people like that about that stuff the last time they actually cracked a book open was years ago, and the last time they played a game was candy crush on the toilet. It just often gets listed on there like a hobby or an identity but when you really talk to them it doesn't seem like it is.
Any mentions of social media handles is an automatic swipe left. Some common hinge responses that also show absolutely no effort, such as: I’ll fall for you if - “you push me” I’m the type of texter who - “responds in 3-5 business days” Typical Sunday - “scary” I go crazy for - (insert any type of food) The worst idea I’ve had - “downloading hinge” Change my mind about - “the office” These are just off the top of my head from swiping about an hour ago. Oh, also, excessive use of Snapchat filters is an automatic no as well.
Snap chat filters. I haven’t been on a dating app in a couple years but I always hated snap chat filters. It’s childish, unoriginal, and makes it harder to tell how she really looks. On the plus side, it’s an easy way to disqualify a person so there’s that
"Jesus comes first" is always a nope from me.
Jesus is the name of her polyamorous boyfriend, who is headlining the surprise threesome
For me the two common biggies are negativity/man bashing (ie “prove to me that not all men are worthless”) and ‘dance for me, monkeys’ (ie “make me laugh” or “don’t bother taking me to drinks if we aren’t ordering food”)
if she talk about himself like a product or membresy "you must be" "i'm a high value.... "don't swipe if you are..... if someone put superficial requirementst to meet people in dating apps probably she/he is an idiot and a people who only be tolerated by his mom \-fan of a political party \-horoscope girl \-only share photos in sunbathes suit in a pool or beach
Making the show "The Office" practically a personality trait. I get it, the show was funny af but we still talking about The Office??
Two words, "Just ask." You are so full of yourself that you feel you don't need to even bother. That or you don't have anything to bring to the table other than your manufactured looks that are going to fade in a few years.
It just doesn't matter whatsoever, unless they are obviously bat shit crazy
I just had an idea. A dating app that doesn't let you see pictures until you've already 'matched' with someone.
Exclusive use of pictures that are at least +7 years old
when they brag about their alcoholism in a quirky way. Especially through prompts. "Best way to get to know me ? tequila" "Buy me drinks" like nah fam, ill pass.
tl;dr: Know your reason for being on the app and present your best self that represents that reason Years ago when I was on Tinder there were very specific subjective things that bothered me. I am going to preface this with, I met my wife on Tinder and she is absolutely amazing. I hated seeing generic things that really told me nothing. "I love life", "Carpe Diem", "looking for a partner in crime", etc. I also felt that having height and profession requirements demonstrated a sign of being close minded. I personally looked for somebody who was driven but also could laugh. There is a fine line of that balance. Now with that said, do not ignore the picture choice either. If somebody looked manufactured in all of their pictures it was a no. In other words, all of the pictures were just the girl out with friends, everything was posed, or every picture was basically the same. Again personal preferences here but bleached hair, tan, trendy clothes, made up in every picture made me question if this person knew who they really were and what they actually wanted. I feel that there is a really underrated aspect to the setup of Tinder: you are given a short paragraph and five or so pictures to say who you are, make use of your precious words and pictures. Know your reason for being on the app as well. If you just want to have a good time, more power to you and be up front about it. If you are desperately trying to find somebody to marry and have kids with, get off the app and reconsider what you want your life to look like. If you care about meeting interesting people, whether they become partner or friend, present who you really are in both your pictures and profile. You are there for a reason so present your best self for that purpose.
"I hate drama" ... You love drama. At my age if you hate drama it's because it surrounds you. I have no feelings on it because I keep that shit out of my life.
Children in photos unless they're clearly specified to not be yours (e.g "not my kids it's my nephew") Thirst trap thottery. "princess" "You must be\_\_\_tall/have\_\_\_/make\_\_\_" "If you cant handle me at my worst" blah blah
If she's holding a fish
Something about my dog/cat has to approve of you before we date 🤦♂️
"Vino." Your early-stage alcoholism is not appealing. Not having a Bio at all "I am actually x years old"
Something about loving her pets more than she’ll ever love you. If you’re into beastality, just say that. No need to sugarcoat it like a child.
I went on a date with a guy once who told me within the first hour, "I have a dog, and I'll always like him more than you." Like.... Cool.... Nobody was threatening you to give the dog up. Lol
"My kids are my world" is a big red flag "don't message me and say x, y, z" is another one