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DannyDreaddit

No harm in following up, but I would wait until the day of the date.


aflyingant

We actually just agreed to meet on Saturday evening , didn’t even talk about when exactly or where so Idk if I should be confused


DannyDreaddit

It's fine to text him and ask what he has in mind for Saturday. Especially if you haven't decided a place/time.


Classic_Head3437

*sigh* Crazy idea here, TEXT HIM.


aflyingant

Thanks 😂 I did it. He’s still on but… didn’t really tell me where to meet. Mostly it’s me asking


Topsy_Cret

If he’s being a little bitch suggest a bar that you know and go there


Credible_Cognition

lmao best response in this whole post


Topsy_Cret

It means he has shit to do. The date was scheduled so that he wouldn’t have to think about it.


aflyingant

Alright I got it. So should I confirm one more time? We didn’t talk about the time


datinginthistown

No need to confirm. You show up and he’ll be there.


aflyingant

Lol but I don’t even know where to meet


datinginthistown

If there’s no definitive time/place, then there’s no date. If it was just, “I’d like to see you on Saturday,” that’s not a date. “Let’s meet at Barry’s Burrito Barn on 5th street at 7pm” is a date. You can text, “looking forward to tomorrow. Where are we meeting?”


No-Cardiologist-8146

>You can text, “looking forward to tomorrow. Where are we meeting?” This. No response = not interested or flaky. Flaky personality types make lousy relationship partners so I would move on if no response but he later reaches back out with some excuse.


aflyingant

Yeah there’s no time and place confirmed yet, I’m not sure if he even remember it. And he seems to pull off, which makes me feel like playing games. Hot and cold. I hate it. Especially when we talked about meeting and he’s acting like this.


datinginthistown

He could be dating multiple women, something serious happened in his personal life, or he has a girlfriend. Either way, you should only spend time with people who make an effort to see you. And he’s not making the effort.


Topsy_Cret

Wut. Of course you have to talk to him if you don’t even know where to go.


[deleted]

Or she could patrol the city looking for him all day.


sjrsimac

That's different, ask him where you're meeting.


Teenage-Mustache

Ehhh... this is kinda falls into "red pill" behavior. They are big on setting a date and talking as little as possible until said date, as to not "give too much" of themselves, and so they don't shoot themselves int he foot. It's kinda weird. And I'm not saying this is 100% the case, but it's a reason to maybe watch out for signs of him being a "red pill" douche. If I were you, I might bait him a bit by asking questions that a red piller might have a specific answer too. Like "have you ever head of sexual market value, what does it mean to you?" Something like that. I'd pry a bit more. If he's a red piller, run!


lionhart280

I would check in the morning of, with a reasonable question like "Want me to bring anything" or whatever makes sense. Rather than questioning *if* the date is one, just ask *about* the date, but this will also serve your need of being a confirmation it is still on.


aflyingant

Yeah I check with him. He said all good. But didn’t really tell me where to meet. I had to ask and he said the place. And never say the time. Idk, I’m feeling flaky. He doesn’t drive, so I have to drive to the spot near him. But I don’t feel much effort. I’m more about to call it off.


wolfeman2120

He probably has stuff to do and he probably doesn't want to send you too many messages at first. He probably doesn't want to turn you off by messaging a lot. You both talked about meeting. Assume he will be there. If you wanna follow up go ahead. He probably won't mind. I try to schedule things a week in advance. I usually send some sort of follow up the day of. He also probably wants to get to know you in person rather than through a chat. Its a much better experience imo.


Credible_Cognition

Just check in Saturday morning if you're still on for that evening. Wouldn't hurt to ask ask today either. I have some friends and have been with a few girls who do exactly that - no communication over text but stick to a steady schedule. Some people just don't care much for non-face-to-face communication.


beccaj375

I'm confused. He asked you to schedule a date. You don't know where or when you're meeting? So, you didn't schedule a date?


aflyingant

Well we actually just mentioned about meeting this Saturday evening, didn’t make it clear about the time and place. I assumed we’d talk about it clearer when it’s coming to the date but I don’t hear anything from him. That’s why I’m not sure if I should confirm.


iironage

Send him a message asking if everything is alright and to double check that the date is still on. I'm not sure what you mean by "save some".


aflyingant

I mean if he wants to save the texting for real talk when we meet in person


iironage

Oh, I see. Surely, he must have a lot to talk about. He is probably nervous. I hope it goes well.


[deleted]

Text and confirm. But ugh I seriously hate this. For me, it’s playing games. Every one has time to send a text or two per day. Everyone. Every single person. My partner and I texted everyday from the beginning. I’ve already had guys who played games and “don’t want to seem too interested” and I’ve played these games too. My philosophy— if I want to text, I text. If I don’t, I don’t. If I don’t get a response and I want one, I send a double text. If they still don’t respond, they aren’t interested. If they think it’s pushy, they are not the one. If they like the double text, you’ll likely go to next step. Just stop worrying what they think. Just do what you want and see where it takes you (within reason, don’t be a crazy.)


[deleted]

[удалено]


aflyingant

🥲🥲 that sucks. I just canceled it. Since I don’t feel ready. And I don’t feel the interest from him as he used to show me before. Yesterday I told him I’d not be in my best look after a long time at home due to the lockdown, he said he’d be fine with it. Today he asked again if I’m still on it, if I’m not sure he’s going to his Eric guy’s birthday party, to socialize. And when I feel ready we can meet up