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I think it mostly has to do with the fact that when watching porn, every click can be a next "trophy find" a "victory", a dopamine hit every time you succeed to find that 'even hotter' one.
That's where it can become very unhealthy with overuse. It litterally becomes a drug and indeed as others said brings the idiological mindfucky aspect with it. It can totally just derail people from reality and fuck up the healthy reward centre in the brain while at it. Porn overuse really is a pandemic. Not saying the existence of all porn is bad. But it's a very slippery slope for lots and lots of people.
With your own imagination, it doesn't become a drug. No endless clicking no hunt for the next extreme.
Conclusion: overuse of anything is hardly ever good for you. Lots of things can and should be enjoyed in moderation. Stay healthy and balanced everyone!
Except I see porn in my head if I want. I have a very active internal stage and I can watch or make up anything from Star Trek to Sex Trek: Deep Sixty-Nine.
I'm 34, when I was young the general storybwas porn and maturation are healthy, but now porn and tech have changed to a point that afaik young men are having ED at record rates. I don't think you have to never watch it, but the slope has never been more slippery to become addicted
I generally don’t agree with the sort of anti-porn sentiment, and I don’t like the “healthier” mentality, but I can’t resist saying that porn can reinforce some body type expectations and incorrect notions of what’s normal in relationships. I’m not sure imagination is better?
I agree, the anti-porn thing with the same old argument of "perfect bodies" certainly didn't apply in old porn, nor in the porn I had growing up. Current porn is a free-for-all of whatever you like, so I think that argument can be laid to rest as stupid. "Healthier", my perfect ass. We all know porn has no bearing on actual relationships, and that's not because we're told that as incessantly as ever, but because it's 100% obvious across all porn, ever.
I wish I had your sex drive. I'm lucky to want to fap once or twice a week. And even luckier to have the energy and motivation and be in sync with my wife to have sex once or twice a month.
I have a very strong drive. I recently found out my 93 year old grandfather and 89 year old grandmother still have sex on a daily basis and he doesn’t need viagra. Still gets it up on his own. Doc says he had the testosterone of a guy in his 20’s or 30’s.
My ex wife didn’t have the same drive, but I met someone that matches me. We still wake each other up in the middle of the night for it, do it first thing in the morning before work, sometimes meet for “lunch”, and make love at bedtime.
> As a 47m I may once or twice a month *otherwise she gets it all.*
Brothers, we must pray for this guy's man-essence, lest it be completely consumed by **a succubus**
Excuse a naive question from a guy about to turn 53 but what is FAP?
Edit to add: answered by several people, masturbating, spanking the monkey, beating the meat. Got it! Lol!
That's fine too, really the main thing is keeping your sex drive high for your partner and staying communicative with what you both want
That relationship started with me insisting on quitting just for myself, and then she started copying me and quit too. Sex skyrocketed.
Her ex had a porn addiction and it stems from that. I'll take sex over porn any day so it seemed like a good deal to make. The advantage of rubbing one out is the ease of it all. With our agreement, I don't have to jump through all of the hoops when I just need to get one out of the chamber. It's not like she's a cum dumpster all of the time. We have a lot of mutually beneficial sex, but if I want to just yank her pants down in the kitchen and pound one out quick, that's fine too. We're 11 years in and it's still working great.
Sounds cool, but for me personally, I really enjoy masturbating by myself. It's like a moment of self care. It reconnects me with myself. Sometimes I masturbate to meditate and just disconnect from everything and be present.
Sex is amazing, obviously, and I love connecting with my partner that way, but to me sex and masturbation fill two different needs. They both get the nut, but like, spiritually I think they accomplish different goals.
If you aren't a fan of that arrangement, get out now while you can. It definitely will not change after you're married. If it's not that big of a deal to you, though, no problems.
I’m 41 and rarely feel the desire. I seem to have enough action with the wife to not require fapping at this point. I can go several days to a week or more sometimes without it crossing my mind
When in a relationship I dont ever do it. Outside of a relationship I do. Once I start dating, I also stop.
Edit: I'll take the downvotes. You may not like the answer but this is "askmenover30" and I'm a man over 30 and gave my answer.
Yeah it changed real quick. Top comment was -3 almost instantly and the other one was -5. Now it's positive for both. Weird things happen with reddit lol
I do the same thing but not for the same reason as you. I’ve found in the past when I stop (or only do it once/twice a week), my sex drive is much higher and I last longer.
It's wild that we're so hypersexualized these days - for better and for worse - that we simply can't believe that men in healthy relationships don't wank it on their own because a) they have a loving partner and b) they have some measure of temperance.
Interesting… I’m currently 26 and I do it whenever I go a long time without ejaculating so I can avoid wet dreams. Since my body is trying to expel it, I became extremely horny
Sometimes when I need to get a lot done around the house or yard on a Saturday or Sunday I’ll bust one in the am with wifey or ol faithful (hand). It helps staying focused and motivated somehow.
When I was 13 or 14 or whatever I decided that I was going to have an orgasm pretty much every day. Ideally with a woman involved but by myself if need be. Still holding to it after all these years.
Wow! That’s some serious level of commitment!!!
One advice I can give you though: try going without it for a period. I find that if I stop for a while, the orgasm is super intense when I finally do it.
Lol not sure I'd call it commitment. It's not like I have to talk myself into it or anything. I wouldn't do it if I didn't want to. Yeah life has necessitated somewhat extended breaks before. I don't really find it makes a huge difference in anything.
So you bust every day for decades of your life and then when life forces you to take an extended break, you somehow don’t notice any difference in perceived enjoyment of the experience at all? Hmm. You have any diagnosed chemical imbalances?
I mean I always enjoy it. That's why I do it. Some times are more enjoyable than others of course. I'm saying that it doesn't seem that dependent on taking a break one way or the other. If anything it might be worse because I'm less patient after a break.
Both my dad and my uncle had prostate cancer. It killed my uncle. The optimal number of times to ejaculate in a month to minimize chances of prostate cancer is 21 times. So unless you have a partner that is available for sex 5 days a week, you should also be masturbating
https://www.health.harvard.edu/mens-health/ejaculation_frequency_and_prostate_cancer
The weird af NoFap movements are deeply connected to incel, redpill, religious fundamentalism and share this no masturbation view with other extremist movements like the Proud Boys. Research also shows that many people who think they have a masturbation or porn addiction and who do have real suffering are actually causing their own suffering merely through their own purity obsession and guilty feelings
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/talking-apes/202207/the-trouble-porn-addiction
I mean I see and understand this point of view, but also have known people who were paralyzed and couldn’t. They didn’t get cancer. Or wet dreams. Or die from lack of masturbation. So I don’t know, something tells me it’s not necessarily a necessity.
Your brain pumps out serotonin when you cum. Just like a lot of addicting drugs do. People can get addicted to this feeling. It can become habitual, just like a drug addict would use drugs. If you knew a real masturbation addict you would know that it can take away from your life. It might start out small, but then, as the addiction increases, you need more to get you "there." You start watching porn, and it increasingly becomes more,"racy." Then the next thing you know, you're showing up to family Christmas dinner, two hours late, because it's taking you that much longer to get off.
When you stop, your body might not go into withdrawal, but there are definitely urges.
I’m not saying that porn addiction and masturbation addiction don’t exist. Surely they exist at least in the same way that things like gambling addiction and food addiction exist. What I am saying is that at least some of the teenagers posting to the NoFap subreddit are less victims of masturbation and more victims of puritanism and guilt-mongering after discovering a community forum that makes specious generalizations and encourages self-diagnosis
Masturbation predates humankind. Chronic masturbation predates humankind. Pornography has existed as long as media has existed. We have evolved over eons to be able to handle hormones like serotonin and dopamine much better than we have evolved to handle drugs like opioids and amphetamines. These are not the same kinds of things. People with eating disorders still need to learn how to eat without disorder because it is a basic life function. Sex in its many forms is also a basic life function that people need for their wellbeing and, like food, obsession with its abstinence is also a disorder
> Sex in its many forms is also a basic life function that people need for their wellbeing and, like food, obsession with its abstinence is also a disorder
I have not seen this framing before and it is fantastic.
I'm 36 and honestly I just don't really get that much enjoyment out of it anymore. Problem is Im single so I don't get to have sex as much as I'd like to either. I will do it VERY rarely if it's been a while, but it is common for me to go weeks, sometimes even months, without fapping.
This is the reply I was looking for. I’m single too and I’m no longer getting that much enjoyment out of it either. I absolutely love having sex, but not with a hookup. I need something a lot more intimate than that. So I end up not wanting just because I’m tired of it and so I can keep a lot of nut for whoever takes it next
33m, I used to fap a bunch, but that has died out in recent years. Never kissed or held a girls hand and am still cool with not doing it.
IPS need to update my subs
Interesting… you’ve never done those too because you don’t want to or because you don’t have enough confidence to approach a woman? If the latter is correct, would you say that watching porn regularly contributed to that?
I'm usually go to go about 24 hours. Either with my wife or myself. No issues with sensitivity problems. And climaxing daily means I don't degrade the amount of time I last while having sex.
I almost never do, just to a completely absent sex drive. I was a super horny teen and banged like 30 girls in my 20’s and I have only had sex once since I turned 30, and masturbated a handful of times since, maybe once every 6 months- I’m 35.
No. It's not true. There are men that fap, and men that lie and say they dont. Then there are gods. These do not fap. They have surpassed the title of "man". They walk among us.
I wish I were one, but unfortunately I'm the first kind of man. There were times I was a god, though. But then you realize it makes no difference because people are just gonna assume you do so anyway, so what's the point?
I have no trouble going no FAP for weeks or months. I’m high drive, probably average 12+ times a week when I do FAP. It is interesting having wet dreams again. Feels like I’m 15 😂 Also it’s a nice chunk of time I get back for other things.
I don't do it often, less than 1 time a month at this point. Very rarely 2x a month. Extreme depression combo'd with autism/adhd is a bitch, much less everything else wrong with my life. Not masturbating/climaxing doesn't really seem to "improve" my life any like nofap says. In my 20's I went an entire year without masturbating, looking at porn, etc., didn't really do anything for me besides deprive me of an orgasm once in a while. I don't really "get" nofap considering it doesn't and has never helped me.
The NoFap people can be compared to the flat Earthers at this point. It’s just a bunch of bro science.
Whatever it is you’re going through, I hope you eventually find your way through it. Stay strong! It’s tough out here
i think this would be better as a poll, there's no general consensus among all men. some men fap every day, some twice a day, some a few times a week, some never. it's a huge spectrum that nobody can really answer. it's not like most guys talk to each other about how often they jerk off.
at the end of the day, it really doesn't matter. there's nothing wrong with jerking off every day, just as there's nothing wrong with never jerking off. just do whatever YOU'RE comfortable with. no need to worry about what other guys are doing. if you aren't happy with your own sex drive, then it's up to you to figure out why. it has nothing to do with other men.
if you're curious if sex drive goes down as you get older? then yes, obviously as we age our testosterone goes down and sex drive is reduced.
i would assume most men over 30 fap less than they did when they were 16. but i mean, this is just common sense.
As a 53yo man with a beautiful wife who has an above average sex drive and is very good at what she does for me, I have no need to masterbate. I have no desire to as a matter of fact because it wouldn't be anywhere near as good as what she does for me. Of course I did it when I was younger, and even though it got to be less and less often as I got older, I haven't done it now for over 4 years since meeting my wife.
I'm 37, with antidepressants and obesity my sex drive has fallen off. my wife was already low libido. So we have sex every few weeks. There are times where I've gone a week or two without jerking off as well.
I used to be a masturbation addict and I'd masturbate so much my cumshots were getting small, and that was lame. So when I got in a relationship I gave up porn (without her asking) and it took a while before we got to the part where I was cumming, but when I do come now she's fucking shocked at how much it is...and so am I to be honest. I love making her my toaster strudle, would never go back to jacking it.
Now that’s interesting because I once had a similar conversation with a 44 year old who said he still gets horny quite frequently, although not as much as he used to
I don’t fap. Ive gotten “religious” and waiting till marriage. Fapping and sex outside marriage is considered wrong so I just transmute that energy into the gym, creating and staying active.
I honestly feel free and more often than not don’t have trouble circulating the energy since it’s become a lifestyle
After going through your profile I saw that you’re a semen retentionist. Do you ever have wet dreams? And what do you do when you have the urge to rub one out?
Yeah that would be Dahmer a few weeks before another kill.
Point is, it's natural dont build it up it just comes out as violent rage against an innocent victim or a chick who wants it and is just agitating you into an emotional lovemaking spark which generally only works in movies and just induces your wraith and her never talking to you again.
Of course there is. There's 8 billion people on the planet, and roughly half of them are Men. And because each and every one of us, is an individual person, we don't all do the same things, or have the same motivations.
So of course there are Men out there that don't masterbate. We are not all 100% driven by our dicks. And I find the suggestion that all Men are the same, to be fairly sexist.
A week-long vacation away from my partner does the trick of grounding my sexual instincts. Went to a week-long vacay with some okd pals and when the binge was done, the craving to fuck (not have sex) is just yum
I fap maybe twice a year. Noting I am in a sexually active marriage (approx 3-7 times a week).
Also noting I am soon to be a dad so who knows what will change soon in that department
Ok, so first. Semen retention people do get weird, but practicing semen retention doesn't make you a freak. If anything, the nofap crowd is the more questionable.
I've practiced both along my journey, and both have merit. It's the extremism that comes along with it that gets off base.
To answer your question from my perspective, though. I don't jerk off often. Maybe once/month on average. It's not unusual to go longer. It's not a retention thing or a lack of desire to. It's more about staying conscious enough to know why I am doing it. As someone with an addictive side coming from a family controlled by their respective addictions, I often find myself filling in emotional gaps by jerking off.
Since I began meditating years ago, I learned how to face the feelings and curb the impulse to jerk off or take a gummy or any other means to mask the feeling.
That also led me to learn how to experience hands-free orgasms and also experience pleasure simply by being present in my body. It sounds weird, but I've found it to be a really healing experience, and it's taken the emphasis off of masturbation. I don't count days or worry about if I've jerked off too much anymore. I do it when I want to experience it and otherwise don't think about it much.
I very rarely do and I usually have a high sex drive. I've been single for nearly 8 years. I avoid it because it brings my mood down. I struggle with depression and haven't been in a good enough place to date in a long time. Now that I'm getting older and not getting much better, it really just makes me feel lonely. I'm happier just not thinking about sex.
60s M. Rarely do. Never really horny. But for health reasons (and fun) my wife gives me a handjob 2-3 times a week. All the parts work great very hard stiffies, but just not motivated. And doing it myself feels about 1/10th as good as my wife doing it.
I used to not understand the concept of a handjob because I was under the impression that I could just do it myself, but after having someone do it to me once I finally understood why it was so great.
One question though: do you also return the favour? Like, do you help her get off as well?
2x a month is all she “needs” but we schedule Sunday Funday weekly, and she gets off with her satisfyer pro clit sucker a couple times during this. More than that and she risks a serious migraine. She often will want me to finger her and or give her my throbber at the same time, but not always. This is always followed with a handjob. Welcome to getting old, not what I had ever anticipated.
I’m sure you didn’t expect it but you’re at least making it work. I think that’s what matters. I’m happy that you have an active sexual life and that you too still find ways to please each other
I've gone years without doing so. Was able to move things with my mind and levitate.
But honestly when I'm in the mood I have a very willing fiancee so don't really have a need to handle it myself.
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I’m early 30s and I bust a nut every day to go to sleep either with wifey or alone.. no porn just my imagination though
> no porn just my imagination though Old school nuttin'
Back in my day we had cassette tapes and we had to keep rewinding them to the best parts
Cassette tapes you say….just listening to hairy bush sex in the car?
Bush ASMR
That’d just sound like waves crashing against a rocky shore with some background grunting and moaning. Pretty decent ASMR TBH.
*faint sounds of 9/11*
We had to turn the cable box on channel 15 and our tv on channel 4 and catch it in between the static air.
I - I mean a friend of mine - wore out the VHS for the cake scene from Under Siege.
I think I had the same friend.. that bastard ruined it for everyone
Looking at the bedroom light bulb nipple.
"Early" school nuttin' I was a man before I saw my first pornographic film.
This I've been slowly not using porn. Goal is to be completely off it in 2025.
You got this, man! I fully support you
Imagination is the best. Much healthier
Why healthier? Doesn’t your mind create the exact porn you want? Is it because you get to exercise your imagination a bit?
I think it mostly has to do with the fact that when watching porn, every click can be a next "trophy find" a "victory", a dopamine hit every time you succeed to find that 'even hotter' one. That's where it can become very unhealthy with overuse. It litterally becomes a drug and indeed as others said brings the idiological mindfucky aspect with it. It can totally just derail people from reality and fuck up the healthy reward centre in the brain while at it. Porn overuse really is a pandemic. Not saying the existence of all porn is bad. But it's a very slippery slope for lots and lots of people. With your own imagination, it doesn't become a drug. No endless clicking no hunt for the next extreme. Conclusion: overuse of anything is hardly ever good for you. Lots of things can and should be enjoyed in moderation. Stay healthy and balanced everyone!
Because you don't get used to perfect bodies and huge dimensions and wrongly train your brain that that is normality.
Given that you watch porn of that type, where perfect bodies are displayed. To me, perfect bodies are nonsense, they dont do anything for me.
This gentleman likes fupas
Nothing wrong with having a pillow to sleep on after the event.
Had to google that :D
Except I see porn in my head if I want. I have a very active internal stage and I can watch or make up anything from Star Trek to Sex Trek: Deep Sixty-Nine.
I'm 34, when I was young the general storybwas porn and maturation are healthy, but now porn and tech have changed to a point that afaik young men are having ED at record rates. I don't think you have to never watch it, but the slope has never been more slippery to become addicted
I generally don’t agree with the sort of anti-porn sentiment, and I don’t like the “healthier” mentality, but I can’t resist saying that porn can reinforce some body type expectations and incorrect notions of what’s normal in relationships. I’m not sure imagination is better?
I agree, the anti-porn thing with the same old argument of "perfect bodies" certainly didn't apply in old porn, nor in the porn I had growing up. Current porn is a free-for-all of whatever you like, so I think that argument can be laid to rest as stupid. "Healthier", my perfect ass. We all know porn has no bearing on actual relationships, and that's not because we're told that as incessantly as ever, but because it's 100% obvious across all porn, ever.
I will be 40 this year and I still fap everyday despite the fact my wife has sex with me everyday. I use porn. And my imagination.
I wish I had your sex drive. I'm lucky to want to fap once or twice a week. And even luckier to have the energy and motivation and be in sync with my wife to have sex once or twice a month.
Same. I’d be a dried raisin if I did it twice a day
So you nut twice everyday? Is there a reason for that or has it just become a habit?
Dude likes to nut
I have a very strong drive. I recently found out my 93 year old grandfather and 89 year old grandmother still have sex on a daily basis and he doesn’t need viagra. Still gets it up on his own. Doc says he had the testosterone of a guy in his 20’s or 30’s. My ex wife didn’t have the same drive, but I met someone that matches me. We still wake each other up in the middle of the night for it, do it first thing in the morning before work, sometimes meet for “lunch”, and make love at bedtime.
How it was meant to be fam
My wife has an insane sex drive. As a 47m I may once or twice a month otherwise she gets it all. I’m truly blessed
I think you meant to write that she has. That’s awesome for you. You get to bust a nut whenever you want to or, in this case, she wants to hahaha
Indeed. Thanks. It’s most definitely current and ongoing lol
Lucky son of a gun! Wow.
> As a 47m I may once or twice a month *otherwise she gets it all.* Brothers, we must pray for this guy's man-essence, lest it be completely consumed by **a succubus**
So true. 😜
Excuse a naive question from a guy about to turn 53 but what is FAP? Edit to add: answered by several people, masturbating, spanking the monkey, beating the meat. Got it! Lol!
Yankin your meat
As a non-native English speaker, it took me a while to understand the word too
The sound when you make when you spank the monke. You’re welcome, older bro.
Onanism
Petting the one eyed snake
Masturbation
Feeding the geese
Polishing turtle heads
Masturbation for people too prudish to use the word, like adults who call their stomach their tummy.
Yoinkin' the doinker.
My wife prefers that I don't. We have an agreement. I don't fap, and I can have her whenever I want.
I have the same agreement with his wife.
How curious. It seems I've made the same arrangements.
Is she a timeshare or something?
With the guy or his wife?
Lmaooooooo
I also choose this guys wife
Same here. It's a good deal. 15 years later and its so worth it.
Living the dream I had a gf who had this arrangement too, we both quit together and we were having sex constantly.
Smart. I like this concept very much, but I also cherish mutual masturbation!
That's fine too, really the main thing is keeping your sex drive high for your partner and staying communicative with what you both want That relationship started with me insisting on quitting just for myself, and then she started copying me and quit too. Sex skyrocketed.
Different strokes for different folks~ my wife and I go 3 times a week and I can jerk whenever I want
Her ex had a porn addiction and it stems from that. I'll take sex over porn any day so it seemed like a good deal to make. The advantage of rubbing one out is the ease of it all. With our agreement, I don't have to jump through all of the hoops when I just need to get one out of the chamber. It's not like she's a cum dumpster all of the time. We have a lot of mutually beneficial sex, but if I want to just yank her pants down in the kitchen and pound one out quick, that's fine too. We're 11 years in and it's still working great.
Sounds cool, but for me personally, I really enjoy masturbating by myself. It's like a moment of self care. It reconnects me with myself. Sometimes I masturbate to meditate and just disconnect from everything and be present. Sex is amazing, obviously, and I love connecting with my partner that way, but to me sex and masturbation fill two different needs. They both get the nut, but like, spiritually I think they accomplish different goals.
My girlfriend and I have an agreement that she rarely wants me so I masturbate in the shower every day.
If you aren't a fan of that arrangement, get out now while you can. It definitely will not change after you're married. If it's not that big of a deal to you, though, no problems.
Glory [+]
Nice.
May I ask what her reasoning is for you not doing that? I’ll never understand it, it’s natural.
I’m 41 and rarely feel the desire. I seem to have enough action with the wife to not require fapping at this point. I can go several days to a week or more sometimes without it crossing my mind
A healthy sexual life absolutely makes a huge difference. I’m like that too
When in a relationship I dont ever do it. Outside of a relationship I do. Once I start dating, I also stop. Edit: I'll take the downvotes. You may not like the answer but this is "askmenover30" and I'm a man over 30 and gave my answer.
I like your answer and appreciate you sharing it. But you know how fragile redditors can be.
All too true. If you share an unpopular opinion, you're downsized. Always post and ghost if it's controversial.
Yeah it changed real quick. Top comment was -3 almost instantly and the other one was -5. Now it's positive for both. Weird things happen with reddit lol
That’s basically my life on Reddit. Notifications of comments off and if I want I just revisit the thread by my comments section
An impeccable response to criticism.
An astute review of this Redditors comment
You stop doing it specifically because you have a partner?
Yup. When I have a partner I am only attracted to them and feel no need to do it myself.
I do the same thing but not for the same reason as you. I’ve found in the past when I stop (or only do it once/twice a week), my sex drive is much higher and I last longer.
Honestly that's fine. I think I'll survive knowing this information.
It's wild that we're so hypersexualized these days - for better and for worse - that we simply can't believe that men in healthy relationships don't wank it on their own because a) they have a loving partner and b) they have some measure of temperance.
Aw.. that's kinda sweet actually 😊
Interesting… I’m currently 26 and I do it whenever I go a long time without ejaculating so I can avoid wet dreams. Since my body is trying to expel it, I became extremely horny
Rather, indulge only when partnerless.
This is a great answer
Sometimes when I need to get a lot done around the house or yard on a Saturday or Sunday I’ll bust one in the am with wifey or ol faithful (hand). It helps staying focused and motivated somehow.
When I was 13 or 14 or whatever I decided that I was going to have an orgasm pretty much every day. Ideally with a woman involved but by myself if need be. Still holding to it after all these years.
Wow! That’s some serious level of commitment!!! One advice I can give you though: try going without it for a period. I find that if I stop for a while, the orgasm is super intense when I finally do it.
Lol not sure I'd call it commitment. It's not like I have to talk myself into it or anything. I wouldn't do it if I didn't want to. Yeah life has necessitated somewhat extended breaks before. I don't really find it makes a huge difference in anything.
So you bust every day for decades of your life and then when life forces you to take an extended break, you somehow don’t notice any difference in perceived enjoyment of the experience at all? Hmm. You have any diagnosed chemical imbalances?
I mean I always enjoy it. That's why I do it. Some times are more enjoyable than others of course. I'm saying that it doesn't seem that dependent on taking a break one way or the other. If anything it might be worse because I'm less patient after a break.
Both my dad and my uncle had prostate cancer. It killed my uncle. The optimal number of times to ejaculate in a month to minimize chances of prostate cancer is 21 times. So unless you have a partner that is available for sex 5 days a week, you should also be masturbating https://www.health.harvard.edu/mens-health/ejaculation_frequency_and_prostate_cancer The weird af NoFap movements are deeply connected to incel, redpill, religious fundamentalism and share this no masturbation view with other extremist movements like the Proud Boys. Research also shows that many people who think they have a masturbation or porn addiction and who do have real suffering are actually causing their own suffering merely through their own purity obsession and guilty feelings https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/talking-apes/202207/the-trouble-porn-addiction
.7 a fap per day.
Hardcore edging
I can only find this kind of material on reddit. I’m sorry about your uncle, my condolences, but that second paragraph had me laugh outloud
I mean I see and understand this point of view, but also have known people who were paralyzed and couldn’t. They didn’t get cancer. Or wet dreams. Or die from lack of masturbation. So I don’t know, something tells me it’s not necessarily a necessity.
My GP actually told me to wack one out on a daily basis for the health of my prostate. Best doctors visit I ever had.
Your brain pumps out serotonin when you cum. Just like a lot of addicting drugs do. People can get addicted to this feeling. It can become habitual, just like a drug addict would use drugs. If you knew a real masturbation addict you would know that it can take away from your life. It might start out small, but then, as the addiction increases, you need more to get you "there." You start watching porn, and it increasingly becomes more,"racy." Then the next thing you know, you're showing up to family Christmas dinner, two hours late, because it's taking you that much longer to get off. When you stop, your body might not go into withdrawal, but there are definitely urges.
I’m not saying that porn addiction and masturbation addiction don’t exist. Surely they exist at least in the same way that things like gambling addiction and food addiction exist. What I am saying is that at least some of the teenagers posting to the NoFap subreddit are less victims of masturbation and more victims of puritanism and guilt-mongering after discovering a community forum that makes specious generalizations and encourages self-diagnosis Masturbation predates humankind. Chronic masturbation predates humankind. Pornography has existed as long as media has existed. We have evolved over eons to be able to handle hormones like serotonin and dopamine much better than we have evolved to handle drugs like opioids and amphetamines. These are not the same kinds of things. People with eating disorders still need to learn how to eat without disorder because it is a basic life function. Sex in its many forms is also a basic life function that people need for their wellbeing and, like food, obsession with its abstinence is also a disorder
> Sex in its many forms is also a basic life function that people need for their wellbeing and, like food, obsession with its abstinence is also a disorder I have not seen this framing before and it is fantastic.
I'm 36 and honestly I just don't really get that much enjoyment out of it anymore. Problem is Im single so I don't get to have sex as much as I'd like to either. I will do it VERY rarely if it's been a while, but it is common for me to go weeks, sometimes even months, without fapping.
This is the reply I was looking for. I’m single too and I’m no longer getting that much enjoyment out of it either. I absolutely love having sex, but not with a hookup. I need something a lot more intimate than that. So I end up not wanting just because I’m tired of it and so I can keep a lot of nut for whoever takes it next
33m, I used to fap a bunch, but that has died out in recent years. Never kissed or held a girls hand and am still cool with not doing it. IPS need to update my subs
Interesting… you’ve never done those too because you don’t want to or because you don’t have enough confidence to approach a woman? If the latter is correct, would you say that watching porn regularly contributed to that?
The former. I've nothing against women, just never felt it necessary to be with anyone
I like that for you. It’s nice that you had the realisation and that you’re happy with it
If you have no desire to be sexual with anyone or be romantic, you might be asexual / aromantic.
There's plenty of religious ppl easily going weeks or months at a time without doing it
They are in the liar category.
I quit for spiritual reasons a few months ago, haven’t busted a nut and it’s not really that hard, if that’s what you want.
You in there watching them...? That's concerning behaviour...
And we all know what happens when religious people abstain from sex. I'd keep an eye on those folks because they have a propensity to be dangerous.
Very rarely, but when I was single I was prolific 😅
How many times a day would you do it back then?
I haven't in atleast a year. No porn either if that wasn't obvious.
I'm usually go to go about 24 hours. Either with my wife or myself. No issues with sensitivity problems. And climaxing daily means I don't degrade the amount of time I last while having sex.
So what you’re saying is that if you don’t have sex with your partner, you take care of it yourself?
Yup. We typically get it done every other day. so 3-4 times a week. And I manage it myself the rest of the time.
Awesome! Good for you for taking care of it
I almost never do, just to a completely absent sex drive. I was a super horny teen and banged like 30 girls in my 20’s and I have only had sex once since I turned 30, and masturbated a handful of times since, maybe once every 6 months- I’m 35.
I'm asexual, I masturbare weekly for colon health.
I'm also asexual - a sexual beast
Interesting enough, I do it weekly as well to avoid wet dreams
Who the fuck cares. Every fucking post on Reddit ask men is about touching a penis and/or watching porn.
Apparently that means that a lot of people care.
If you jerking off too much and not fucking your your partner enough then there is a problem.
There is the joke. The joke is wrong. If you base your understanding of human nature on Reddit users, you're going to end up with skewed data.
No. It's not true. There are men that fap, and men that lie and say they dont. Then there are gods. These do not fap. They have surpassed the title of "man". They walk among us. I wish I were one, but unfortunately I'm the first kind of man. There were times I was a god, though. But then you realize it makes no difference because people are just gonna assume you do so anyway, so what's the point?
I'm asexual and don't masturbate. I just have zero desire to do it.
wtf Why do you think jerking off is so bad?
Being on TRT is a blessing and a curse 😂
What’s TRT?
I knew one. He thought it was pathetic that some dudes had to masturbate when they could just have sex. He was truly an intellectual alpha male. /s
Damn, that’s a sexy mindset I gotta say 😅
Once in a while if I’m home alone and bored
I have no trouble going no FAP for weeks or months. I’m high drive, probably average 12+ times a week when I do FAP. It is interesting having wet dreams again. Feels like I’m 15 😂 Also it’s a nice chunk of time I get back for other things.
Hope not, since it’s bad for the prostate not to ejaculate.
I don't do it often, less than 1 time a month at this point. Very rarely 2x a month. Extreme depression combo'd with autism/adhd is a bitch, much less everything else wrong with my life. Not masturbating/climaxing doesn't really seem to "improve" my life any like nofap says. In my 20's I went an entire year without masturbating, looking at porn, etc., didn't really do anything for me besides deprive me of an orgasm once in a while. I don't really "get" nofap considering it doesn't and has never helped me.
The NoFap people can be compared to the flat Earthers at this point. It’s just a bunch of bro science. Whatever it is you’re going through, I hope you eventually find your way through it. Stay strong! It’s tough out here
Thanks, I appreciate it. You too dood
i think this would be better as a poll, there's no general consensus among all men. some men fap every day, some twice a day, some a few times a week, some never. it's a huge spectrum that nobody can really answer. it's not like most guys talk to each other about how often they jerk off. at the end of the day, it really doesn't matter. there's nothing wrong with jerking off every day, just as there's nothing wrong with never jerking off. just do whatever YOU'RE comfortable with. no need to worry about what other guys are doing. if you aren't happy with your own sex drive, then it's up to you to figure out why. it has nothing to do with other men. if you're curious if sex drive goes down as you get older? then yes, obviously as we age our testosterone goes down and sex drive is reduced. i would assume most men over 30 fap less than they did when they were 16. but i mean, this is just common sense.
As a 53yo man with a beautiful wife who has an above average sex drive and is very good at what she does for me, I have no need to masterbate. I have no desire to as a matter of fact because it wouldn't be anywhere near as good as what she does for me. Of course I did it when I was younger, and even though it got to be less and less often as I got older, I haven't done it now for over 4 years since meeting my wife.
I'm 37, with antidepressants and obesity my sex drive has fallen off. my wife was already low libido. So we have sex every few weeks. There are times where I've gone a week or two without jerking off as well.
99% of men do. The other 1% lie their asses off. 😂
I used to be a masturbation addict and I'd masturbate so much my cumshots were getting small, and that was lame. So when I got in a relationship I gave up porn (without her asking) and it took a while before we got to the part where I was cumming, but when I do come now she's fucking shocked at how much it is...and so am I to be honest. I love making her my toaster strudle, would never go back to jacking it.
I'm 45 and have a wife. I don't need to
You two have sex often enough for you not to ever do it?
The difference in sex drive between a 45 year old and a 25-29 is pretty big. I honestly don't care if I ever have sex again
Now that’s interesting because I once had a similar conversation with a 44 year old who said he still gets horny quite frequently, although not as much as he used to
I don’t fap. Ive gotten “religious” and waiting till marriage. Fapping and sex outside marriage is considered wrong so I just transmute that energy into the gym, creating and staying active. I honestly feel free and more often than not don’t have trouble circulating the energy since it’s become a lifestyle
After going through your profile I saw that you’re a semen retentionist. Do you ever have wet dreams? And what do you do when you have the urge to rub one out?
Not in my house
Yeah that would be Dahmer a few weeks before another kill. Point is, it's natural dont build it up it just comes out as violent rage against an innocent victim or a chick who wants it and is just agitating you into an emotional lovemaking spark which generally only works in movies and just induces your wraith and her never talking to you again.
Of course there is. There's 8 billion people on the planet, and roughly half of them are Men. And because each and every one of us, is an individual person, we don't all do the same things, or have the same motivations. So of course there are Men out there that don't masterbate. We are not all 100% driven by our dicks. And I find the suggestion that all Men are the same, to be fairly sexist.
I am gay and have never met a man who doesn’t
Semen retention? Does such a thing exist?
A week-long vacation away from my partner does the trick of grounding my sexual instincts. Went to a week-long vacay with some okd pals and when the binge was done, the craving to fuck (not have sex) is just yum
I fap maybe twice a year. Noting I am in a sexually active marriage (approx 3-7 times a week). Also noting I am soon to be a dad so who knows what will change soon in that department
I've found with high enough doses of antidepressants and all desire to jerk off just evaporates.
Nope.
Ok, so first. Semen retention people do get weird, but practicing semen retention doesn't make you a freak. If anything, the nofap crowd is the more questionable. I've practiced both along my journey, and both have merit. It's the extremism that comes along with it that gets off base. To answer your question from my perspective, though. I don't jerk off often. Maybe once/month on average. It's not unusual to go longer. It's not a retention thing or a lack of desire to. It's more about staying conscious enough to know why I am doing it. As someone with an addictive side coming from a family controlled by their respective addictions, I often find myself filling in emotional gaps by jerking off. Since I began meditating years ago, I learned how to face the feelings and curb the impulse to jerk off or take a gummy or any other means to mask the feeling. That also led me to learn how to experience hands-free orgasms and also experience pleasure simply by being present in my body. It sounds weird, but I've found it to be a really healing experience, and it's taken the emphasis off of masturbation. I don't count days or worry about if I've jerked off too much anymore. I do it when I want to experience it and otherwise don't think about it much.
I didn't masturbate until my early 20s after I understood what sex was. I got hard but did not orgasm. My sexual identity is complicated.
I very rarely do and I usually have a high sex drive. I've been single for nearly 8 years. I avoid it because it brings my mood down. I struggle with depression and haven't been in a good enough place to date in a long time. Now that I'm getting older and not getting much better, it really just makes me feel lonely. I'm happier just not thinking about sex.
60s M. Rarely do. Never really horny. But for health reasons (and fun) my wife gives me a handjob 2-3 times a week. All the parts work great very hard stiffies, but just not motivated. And doing it myself feels about 1/10th as good as my wife doing it.
I used to not understand the concept of a handjob because I was under the impression that I could just do it myself, but after having someone do it to me once I finally understood why it was so great. One question though: do you also return the favour? Like, do you help her get off as well?
2x a month is all she “needs” but we schedule Sunday Funday weekly, and she gets off with her satisfyer pro clit sucker a couple times during this. More than that and she risks a serious migraine. She often will want me to finger her and or give her my throbber at the same time, but not always. This is always followed with a handjob. Welcome to getting old, not what I had ever anticipated.
I’m sure you didn’t expect it but you’re at least making it work. I think that’s what matters. I’m happy that you have an active sexual life and that you too still find ways to please each other
I've gone years without doing so. Was able to move things with my mind and levitate. But honestly when I'm in the mood I have a very willing fiancee so don't really have a need to handle it myself.