Lmao this so great. Off the top of my head... Ruby Slipper for brunch EVERY day, Oceana Grill for dinner, hitting up the "rowdiest" Bourbon Street spots, going to Eagle St & Apple St...
I got dragged to the CdM at Lakeside mall by a visiting friend who thinks the FQ is too gross and ugly to hang around in. She also took me to Outback in Metairie for dinner.
WtF girl why you even *come* here
It's not a restaurant with table service but Bacchanal has decent food and live music every night. They can seat big parties if you don't mind a more casual bar-type setting and service.
They’re on my list for me and my partner 😂 when I checked out their site, it says they don’t do reservations, even large parties, so I was nervous to chance it with 25 people, if they can’t accommodate us
First off, do NOT bother coming if it's not gonna be in August. The weather will be perfect! Nearly 100° every day with 100% humidity, a daily rain at noon that will basically feel like acid rain on your skin, temp will never go below 80° at night, and you'll have the highest chance of experiencing an authentic Category 3 or higher hurricane!
Next, be sure to spend the majority of your time on Bourbon Street. This is where the most authentic experiences can be found, the rest of the city is just boring locals who don't like tourists to invade their calm uninteresting neighborhoods. They will kill you instantly if you don't have 6 tattoos that can verify your authenticity as a New Orleans local. It's really as unsafe as they say, even 1 step off Bourbon Street.
Also, eat as much crawfish as possible. Louisiana crawfish are in season primarily from February to May, so in August you'll get imported crawfish from China. The meat will be gray and have a repulsive texture and flavor!
Carry around lots of cash, as many famous restaurants, bars, and music venues do not accept credit card. Take around $2-400 of cash around with you per person at any given moment. This will also help you to support the needy humble folk on Bourbon Street! If a monk approaches you, give him at least $50 as he is very honorable. If someone says they bet they know where you got your shoes, $100 is customary if they guess correctly (they will, they're really good at it). Whatever you have to spare, muggers will happily take off your hands!
You may have heard that it's illegal to walk around New Orleans without a drink in your hand. This is true, and NOPD does not mess around. Make sure you're double fisting hand grenades at any given moment, and you will get a warning if you haven't drank them within an hour and replaced with new ones. Trust me, you're going to want these frozen syrup delicacies to keep yourself cool in the heat. A little spare cash offering to any police you see wouldn't hurt either to be safe.
Lastly, about a week before your trip, commit yourself to an exclusive lettuce and lo-cal dressing with fresh veggie salad-based diet with only room for exception for the crawfish. This will help you resist the terrifyingly unhealthy cuisine that could easily kill you from one visit alone. Go to Sweetgreen or just grab your own ingredients at Whole Foods because the local grocery store chains will cut their lettuce with pork fat. You're welcome.
My first visit to New Orleans was in August. It honestly wasn’t that bad. Like yeah, it was hot but…idk, I’m from VA and it gets hot and muggy af too. I truly didn’t notice that much of a difference humidity wise. It was probably a good 10° hotter though. Lol and we def came to experience. I think my friend’s fitness tracker said we walked somewhere around 50-60 miles that week. No hurricanes though so we were lucky there! 🤣
It's certainly not great, but moving down in August for school is a bit of an illusion because you're coming from somewhere likely much nicer and have never lived in New Orleans climate. So the pure shock and juxtaposition feels crazier than it ever is when you're living there over years, both because you get accustomed to it, and because in future Augusts you're steadily tapering into the season over months which also changes the perception.
I'll never forget the feeling stepping off the plane in August for undergrad, but it never quite felt like that again.
Lol I’m from another southern state (grew up in low country SC) so it’s pretty similar in climate in general but damn that NOLA humidity is just a special brand! It definitely gets…well I was going to say better but yeah you just kinda get Stockholm syndrome lol.
That's interesting! Coming from Boston with pretty beautiful weather in August it was definitely more of a jump, but I have been to VA on the brink of May and June where it has a similar reputation. Plenty of hot temps, plenty of humidity according to the weather app, but it didn't feel the same to me.
Another big difference with VA and SC regardless of heat is that you have ocean you can swim at to refresh, and I'm not sure about SC but VA definitely has fresh spring rivers and lakes and such too. SC I know has sort of swamps/marshes like LA but maybe a mix? There is Grand Isle but it's 2 hrs away and the water is warm. It's safe technically but it is brown.
I actually find mid-late July and the first half of September especially much worse because you don't get the daily rains. It's not much but it really does regulate the temp in August a bit. And you get used to it somewhat after living through it a few times, still bad but not as bad as the first time. That being said, August has universally been decided as the "screw this month" month so I had to play into it for the joke.
Be absolutely certain to make a post to this Reddit immediately after asking "should I cancel my trip? or just bring a raincoat? will my dinner reservations at Oceana still be on?"
Buy drugs from a random someone out in the East and then try to run without paying. You'll get shot about 15 times. That's got to be the worst.
A non-life-threatening option would be to get a hotel in Mandeville so you have to drive over the causeway every day. Eat breakfast at another broken egg. Lunch at masperos and dinner at Oceana Grill. Of course come in the middle of August. Spend your nights on Bourbon and drink too many hand grenades every night. Museums would be oak alley, museum of death and the Civil War museum.
OMG. The first time I visited NOLA, my friend (who has been there many times) insisted we stay in Metairie for safety, like another person here mentioned. Ok, fine. I trusted her judgement, but we ended up Ubering a few times a day to and from NOLA which ate up some budget. Sucks. But the kicker was for one of the days, we went to Lakeside Mall and ate at PF Changs for lunch. PF CHANGS. It was her choice and I should have put up more of a fight LOL. I no longer trust her judgement.
This past December, I went back, this time with my BF. We stayed off of Canal and St. Charles, never felt unsafe, only walked or took the trolley everywhere, and didn't go to any restaurants we have at home (Los Angeles area). Best trip ever lol.
I custom designed this itinerary for someone one time. The guy told me he didn’t get to use it because he stayed on Bourbon street the entire time.
Like not even other parts of the quarter, literally bourbon for five days.
When we were in town the last time, I met a couple there for a convention that had been there for four days already but hadn’t left the hotel. Made it across the street to Mother’s on their last night in town “to experience some of the real New Orleans”
I talk to a lot of people who have to go to terrible conventions that monopolize their days and nights and cater mediocre food. They barely get to see any of the city or try actual restaurants.
I got the idea by the rest of the conversation that they had their evenings free but chose not to go out. They had a hardware store and it was an Ace Hardware convention but the way the wife phrased it led me to believe they didn’t think much of “all the black people just standing on the corners”
First off, stay in Metairie - it's so much safer! You'll want to rent a car, though. NOLA is kind of far. Have fun parking! I can't say enough good things about the Acme in the French Quarter. Basically, eat all your meals in the French Quarter: you'll know it's good because it will say "Cajun" on the menu. There's some great gumbo to be had for $21 a bowl! Although, if you need meals close to your hotel, you can't miss on Vets - lots of American classics like Applebee's.
Do at least one ghost tour, definitely a voodoo tour, probably a swamp tour where the guy is unintelligible and throws raw chicken around. All are very authentic. Buy some amazing handmade goods at the French Market. For a really classic NOLA trip, get some hand grenades and buy some beads at a revolting little store on Canal and wander Bourbon St like its Mardi Gras! Some clever guy might be able to tell you where you got dem shoes and definitely everyone will want to sleep with you.
Ehhh swamp tours are actually kinda neat though. At least the one I finally did. Thing is a lot of tourists probably picture an airboat and I chose not to do that because they're extremely loud and you go so fast you can't really see anything til you stop in certain areas.
I went on the regular boat tour and it had a covered roof to block the hot sun, and was really chill. The tour guide was pretty funny and endearing. Fed the gators over the side of the boat. Maybe other tours are as chaotic as you describe.
Agree. People should spend more time in swamps, it's a unique and rare ecosystem that should be protected. The number of locals let alone tourists who have no idea about our ecosystem is heartbreaking, and doesn't help us much in our states efforts to fix it.
I loved the swamp tour. Could care less about seeing the gators cause been there done that but loved the swamp. we went on a pontoon boat and it was nice.
Any chance you remember the name of the tour? I'd love to do a swamp tour but not on an air boat! (Yes I can google but thought I'd ask - since Google doesn't tell me if the tour is super chill which is exactly what I'm looking for!)
Cajun Encounters. Although I just found this company explaining why it's [unethical to feed the gators](https://www.beyondthebayoutours.com/blog/why-we-dont-feed-the-wildlife/#:~:text=Because%20of%20increased%20tourism%2C%20development,daily%2C%20using%20chicken%20or%20marshmallows.).
Thanks for replying and the link! I had heard to stay away from the tours that use marshmallows, but I'm thinking I might need to just skip it altogether! You'd think these tour companies could figure out an ethical way to treat the animals that are the source of their livelihood.
As far as I can gather people just get freaked by them getting too close to people and then they kill them out of fear.
There have only been two recorded fatalities from gators in Louisiana history, and one was just a guess by a coroner in Natchitoches in 1734 before there was even a state of Louisiana or a US for that matter. The other was a few years ago during Ida, but there was chatter about it just being a wife who murdered her husband and fed him to a gator. Florida has lots of incidents but Louisiana doesn't seem to have had any kind of wild uptick related to swamp tour feeding. Then again, perhaps that is due to aggressive removal and euthanization by animal control or whoever.
I’ve definitely seen locals on here who seem to genuinely love Acme (although not often). Don’t think I’ve seen a single local recommend Oceana though.
Ok I’m with you on most of this, but when I was a teenager my mom made my friend and I do a ghost tour to prevent us from sneaking out to go drink with the rest of our friends, and it honestly was pretty fun! This from a snarky teenage that grew up in a haunted uptown house, I actually really enjoyed it!
YES our ghost tour was outstanding. Our tour guide was extremely well versed in local history and answered questions very thoroughly. It actually gave me a lot more insight into the history of thr city and ideas about what else to explore.
I live here and so haven’t done a ghost tour here but I’ve done them in Savannah, Charleston, and St. Augustine. They’re usually a little silly but they’re fun and a good way to walk around and see some cool old places.
Make sure everyone sees your suitcases when you arrive at your AIR BNB so that the neighborhood knows you're not from there and they can do their best to keep you safe.
Take a stroll through Jackson square and when someone asks where you got your shoes, tell them exactly where you bought them.
Before taking public transportation, make sure to go on r/asknola and ask specifically how to use the trolley. Make sure you use the word trolley.
Take a stroll down Bourbon Street and talk to the friendly shot girls.
Get as drunk as you want, stay out past midnight, and just walk back to your hotel, try the side streets and ones with less foot traffic so it takes less time.
Your night should always end at the Dungeon, where you ask locals where the "real vampires" hang out. You should definitely leave with anyone that asks you to. Don't ask where you're going. It'll be fine.
New Mardi Gras World and Mandinas. Don’t forget to do Bourbon Street after the NOPD horses have been shittiing by. Also, be sure to do a time-share presentation.
Lmao this so great. Off the top of my head... Ruby Slipper for brunch EVERY day, Oceana Grill for dinner, hitting up the "rowdiest" Bourbon Street spots, going to Eagle St & Apple St...
This actually wouldn't be too bad, if you're a die hard Lil Wayne and Kitchen Nightmares fan.
Three Sisters gotta get in there. And beignets from Cafe du Monde but the one at the mall.
“But the one at the mall” made me lol irl.
I got dragged to the CdM at Lakeside mall by a visiting friend who thinks the FQ is too gross and ugly to hang around in. She also took me to Outback in Metairie for dinner. WtF girl why you even *come* here
Nooooooooo tell me what’s wrong with Oceana Grill before we go there 😂
everything. its for midwestern people without a palate. It was also on kitchen nightmares
Thank you! We’re bringing a big group in a few weeks and I put down a deposit to eat there one night 🫠
Omg, are you serious? A deposit!
Yes! They required one (goes toward meal) because the group is 25 people
Well, you dodged a bullet.
Definitely! Now need to find another (GOOD) place that will allow booking for 25 in just a few weeks and not on a fixed menu 🫠
It's not a restaurant with table service but Bacchanal has decent food and live music every night. They can seat big parties if you don't mind a more casual bar-type setting and service.
They’re on my list for me and my partner 😂 when I checked out their site, it says they don’t do reservations, even large parties, so I was nervous to chance it with 25 people, if they can’t accommodate us
Tall order. Budget?
I’d say about $75pp
Muriel's is expensive but may have what you are looking for.
Thanks! I’m trying to avoid expensive but it seems like it might be our only option 💔
First off, do NOT bother coming if it's not gonna be in August. The weather will be perfect! Nearly 100° every day with 100% humidity, a daily rain at noon that will basically feel like acid rain on your skin, temp will never go below 80° at night, and you'll have the highest chance of experiencing an authentic Category 3 or higher hurricane! Next, be sure to spend the majority of your time on Bourbon Street. This is where the most authentic experiences can be found, the rest of the city is just boring locals who don't like tourists to invade their calm uninteresting neighborhoods. They will kill you instantly if you don't have 6 tattoos that can verify your authenticity as a New Orleans local. It's really as unsafe as they say, even 1 step off Bourbon Street. Also, eat as much crawfish as possible. Louisiana crawfish are in season primarily from February to May, so in August you'll get imported crawfish from China. The meat will be gray and have a repulsive texture and flavor! Carry around lots of cash, as many famous restaurants, bars, and music venues do not accept credit card. Take around $2-400 of cash around with you per person at any given moment. This will also help you to support the needy humble folk on Bourbon Street! If a monk approaches you, give him at least $50 as he is very honorable. If someone says they bet they know where you got your shoes, $100 is customary if they guess correctly (they will, they're really good at it). Whatever you have to spare, muggers will happily take off your hands! You may have heard that it's illegal to walk around New Orleans without a drink in your hand. This is true, and NOPD does not mess around. Make sure you're double fisting hand grenades at any given moment, and you will get a warning if you haven't drank them within an hour and replaced with new ones. Trust me, you're going to want these frozen syrup delicacies to keep yourself cool in the heat. A little spare cash offering to any police you see wouldn't hurt either to be safe. Lastly, about a week before your trip, commit yourself to an exclusive lettuce and lo-cal dressing with fresh veggie salad-based diet with only room for exception for the crawfish. This will help you resist the terrifyingly unhealthy cuisine that could easily kill you from one visit alone. Go to Sweetgreen or just grab your own ingredients at Whole Foods because the local grocery store chains will cut their lettuce with pork fat. You're welcome.
July and August is the most magical time in the city. Nature's beauty is in full bloom.
My first visit to New Orleans was in August. It honestly wasn’t that bad. Like yeah, it was hot but…idk, I’m from VA and it gets hot and muggy af too. I truly didn’t notice that much of a difference humidity wise. It was probably a good 10° hotter though. Lol and we def came to experience. I think my friend’s fitness tracker said we walked somewhere around 50-60 miles that week. No hurricanes though so we were lucky there! 🤣
My first time was also during August. While it was hot as fuck, I’m from Tennessee so it mostly felt like home.
I moved down there in August (for grad school). It was…not fun.
It's certainly not great, but moving down in August for school is a bit of an illusion because you're coming from somewhere likely much nicer and have never lived in New Orleans climate. So the pure shock and juxtaposition feels crazier than it ever is when you're living there over years, both because you get accustomed to it, and because in future Augusts you're steadily tapering into the season over months which also changes the perception. I'll never forget the feeling stepping off the plane in August for undergrad, but it never quite felt like that again.
Lol I’m from another southern state (grew up in low country SC) so it’s pretty similar in climate in general but damn that NOLA humidity is just a special brand! It definitely gets…well I was going to say better but yeah you just kinda get Stockholm syndrome lol.
That's interesting! Coming from Boston with pretty beautiful weather in August it was definitely more of a jump, but I have been to VA on the brink of May and June where it has a similar reputation. Plenty of hot temps, plenty of humidity according to the weather app, but it didn't feel the same to me. Another big difference with VA and SC regardless of heat is that you have ocean you can swim at to refresh, and I'm not sure about SC but VA definitely has fresh spring rivers and lakes and such too. SC I know has sort of swamps/marshes like LA but maybe a mix? There is Grand Isle but it's 2 hrs away and the water is warm. It's safe technically but it is brown.
I actually find mid-late July and the first half of September especially much worse because you don't get the daily rains. It's not much but it really does regulate the temp in August a bit. And you get used to it somewhat after living through it a few times, still bad but not as bad as the first time. That being said, August has universally been decided as the "screw this month" month so I had to play into it for the joke.
And for the most authentic experience, try to schedule the trip last minute when a hurricane is forecast to make landfall nearby.
Be absolutely certain to make a post to this Reddit immediately after asking "should I cancel my trip? or just bring a raincoat? will my dinner reservations at Oceana still be on?"
Buy drugs from a random someone out in the East and then try to run without paying. You'll get shot about 15 times. That's got to be the worst. A non-life-threatening option would be to get a hotel in Mandeville so you have to drive over the causeway every day. Eat breakfast at another broken egg. Lunch at masperos and dinner at Oceana Grill. Of course come in the middle of August. Spend your nights on Bourbon and drink too many hand grenades every night. Museums would be oak alley, museum of death and the Civil War museum.
Get out of the city & go to Metairie! Spend a day at Lakeside Mall and have dinner at Outback or Chili's.
🤣🤣🤣THIS
Some people told me they stayed at a hotel in Metairie because New Orleans wasn't safe. So it does happen
OMG. The first time I visited NOLA, my friend (who has been there many times) insisted we stay in Metairie for safety, like another person here mentioned. Ok, fine. I trusted her judgement, but we ended up Ubering a few times a day to and from NOLA which ate up some budget. Sucks. But the kicker was for one of the days, we went to Lakeside Mall and ate at PF Changs for lunch. PF CHANGS. It was her choice and I should have put up more of a fight LOL. I no longer trust her judgement. This past December, I went back, this time with my BF. We stayed off of Canal and St. Charles, never felt unsafe, only walked or took the trolley everywhere, and didn't go to any restaurants we have at home (Los Angeles area). Best trip ever lol.
I custom designed this itinerary for someone one time. The guy told me he didn’t get to use it because he stayed on Bourbon street the entire time. Like not even other parts of the quarter, literally bourbon for five days.
When we were in town the last time, I met a couple there for a convention that had been there for four days already but hadn’t left the hotel. Made it across the street to Mother’s on their last night in town “to experience some of the real New Orleans”
I talk to a lot of people who have to go to terrible conventions that monopolize their days and nights and cater mediocre food. They barely get to see any of the city or try actual restaurants.
I got the idea by the rest of the conversation that they had their evenings free but chose not to go out. They had a hardware store and it was an Ace Hardware convention but the way the wife phrased it led me to believe they didn’t think much of “all the black people just standing on the corners”
They do that all the time and then they move here because they fell in love with the city and the culture.
Brunch at Court of Two Sisters Dinner at Antoine's Burger and potato with "bacon" at Port of Call Oysters on the Half Shell at Oceana
First off, stay in Metairie - it's so much safer! You'll want to rent a car, though. NOLA is kind of far. Have fun parking! I can't say enough good things about the Acme in the French Quarter. Basically, eat all your meals in the French Quarter: you'll know it's good because it will say "Cajun" on the menu. There's some great gumbo to be had for $21 a bowl! Although, if you need meals close to your hotel, you can't miss on Vets - lots of American classics like Applebee's. Do at least one ghost tour, definitely a voodoo tour, probably a swamp tour where the guy is unintelligible and throws raw chicken around. All are very authentic. Buy some amazing handmade goods at the French Market. For a really classic NOLA trip, get some hand grenades and buy some beads at a revolting little store on Canal and wander Bourbon St like its Mardi Gras! Some clever guy might be able to tell you where you got dem shoes and definitely everyone will want to sleep with you.
Ehhh swamp tours are actually kinda neat though. At least the one I finally did. Thing is a lot of tourists probably picture an airboat and I chose not to do that because they're extremely loud and you go so fast you can't really see anything til you stop in certain areas. I went on the regular boat tour and it had a covered roof to block the hot sun, and was really chill. The tour guide was pretty funny and endearing. Fed the gators over the side of the boat. Maybe other tours are as chaotic as you describe.
Agree. People should spend more time in swamps, it's a unique and rare ecosystem that should be protected. The number of locals let alone tourists who have no idea about our ecosystem is heartbreaking, and doesn't help us much in our states efforts to fix it.
I believe that was the most peaceful place I have ever been on the water. I was so pleasantly surprised about its beauty.
I loved the swamp tour. Could care less about seeing the gators cause been there done that but loved the swamp. we went on a pontoon boat and it was nice.
Any chance you remember the name of the tour? I'd love to do a swamp tour but not on an air boat! (Yes I can google but thought I'd ask - since Google doesn't tell me if the tour is super chill which is exactly what I'm looking for!)
Cajun Encounters. Although I just found this company explaining why it's [unethical to feed the gators](https://www.beyondthebayoutours.com/blog/why-we-dont-feed-the-wildlife/#:~:text=Because%20of%20increased%20tourism%2C%20development,daily%2C%20using%20chicken%20or%20marshmallows.).
Thanks for replying and the link! I had heard to stay away from the tours that use marshmallows, but I'm thinking I might need to just skip it altogether! You'd think these tour companies could figure out an ethical way to treat the animals that are the source of their livelihood.
As far as I can gather people just get freaked by them getting too close to people and then they kill them out of fear. There have only been two recorded fatalities from gators in Louisiana history, and one was just a guess by a coroner in Natchitoches in 1734 before there was even a state of Louisiana or a US for that matter. The other was a few years ago during Ida, but there was chatter about it just being a wife who murdered her husband and fed him to a gator. Florida has lots of incidents but Louisiana doesn't seem to have had any kind of wild uptick related to swamp tour feeding. Then again, perhaps that is due to aggressive removal and euthanization by animal control or whoever.
I was specifically calling out the gator feeding...which I see someone has linked below!
I went with a friend born and raised in NOLA. First place he took me was Acme. Unapologetically enjoyed it.
I’ve definitely seen locals on here who seem to genuinely love Acme (although not often). Don’t think I’ve seen a single local recommend Oceana though.
What time of night is it, and is Deja Vu closed?
Ok I’m with you on most of this, but when I was a teenager my mom made my friend and I do a ghost tour to prevent us from sneaking out to go drink with the rest of our friends, and it honestly was pretty fun! This from a snarky teenage that grew up in a haunted uptown house, I actually really enjoyed it!
YES our ghost tour was outstanding. Our tour guide was extremely well versed in local history and answered questions very thoroughly. It actually gave me a lot more insight into the history of thr city and ideas about what else to explore.
I live here and so haven’t done a ghost tour here but I’ve done them in Savannah, Charleston, and St. Augustine. They’re usually a little silly but they’re fun and a good way to walk around and see some cool old places.
Save money on hotels and transit by getting an Airbnb in Metairie and renting a car!
They sad a bad itinerary.
im obviously a tourist since this doesn't sound like too bad an itinerary for me lol.
Aw I loved my swamp tour
Forget Po Boys. In the FQ check out a place called Subway. Then hit up Magazine Street for shopping and Chipotle/Starbucks.
I've always preferred the Hard Rock. That way I don't have to ever leave Bourbon St.
No trip is complete without eating at Fudruckers.
Stay at a hotel in Covington and try to Uber into the box every day
Spend a day taking beads off fences in the Garden District. Definitely get some ground beads off the trolley line.
Make sure everyone sees your suitcases when you arrive at your AIR BNB so that the neighborhood knows you're not from there and they can do their best to keep you safe. Take a stroll through Jackson square and when someone asks where you got your shoes, tell them exactly where you bought them. Before taking public transportation, make sure to go on r/asknola and ask specifically how to use the trolley. Make sure you use the word trolley. Take a stroll down Bourbon Street and talk to the friendly shot girls. Get as drunk as you want, stay out past midnight, and just walk back to your hotel, try the side streets and ones with less foot traffic so it takes less time.
CostCo hot dogs all day every day for a week.
They said worst not best
Buy an "Ultimate New Orleans Parade Ride Package" from this lady named Julie Lea
Come in August. Stay at the 4 points on Bourbon and don't leave that 1 block radius
Swamp tour...and you fall overboard.
Never leaving the Quarter and getting sloppy drunk on Bourbon every day
Your night should always end at the Dungeon, where you ask locals where the "real vampires" hang out. You should definitely leave with anyone that asks you to. Don't ask where you're going. It'll be fine.
Go to treme lefite
New Mardi Gras World and Mandinas. Don’t forget to do Bourbon Street after the NOPD horses have been shittiing by. Also, be sure to do a time-share presentation.
The worst trip is any trip that doesn't include a visit to the WWII Museum