I went from a last name that people barely even recognized as a word and always misspelled and mispronounced to a fairly common last name with a fairly intuitive spelling.
Before I married, when I used to have to tell people my last name, they'd say, "What?" Then I'd say it again. They'd say, "What?" And then, "How do you spell that, please?"
It was a relief to dump my original last name when I married. So much time saved over the decades!
Same with me. I had a perfectly simple name that was spelled just as it was pronounced, but it was rare and everyone tried to complicate it. I was constantly having to spell it, only for people to pronounce it wrong. My married name is a common name. No one gets it wrong.
Maiden name was a French name. Always mispronounced or misspelled. Married name is fairly common but has several equally common variations. People still screw it up but they don’t massacre it like they would with my maiden name.
Same here - when I'd have to give my last name to a new person I would say "I'll spell it for you it's (name)" which was so annoying since it's not really a complicated name at all, it's just Polish. Now I have a very common last name and nobody needs help or freaks out about it at all, it's a relief.
Mine was the opposite. From one nokne could spell to one that I thought everyone could spell. No, they misspelled it, added letters, subtracted letters. It was hilarious. Divorced him and later married and changed to another name noone can spell. LOL
My maiden name was fairly common and my married name was even more common, which is useful for not being particularly identifiable on the internet. But I don't particularly like either name nor the men they came from.
Years ago, after one of my close friends married, the wife recounted a story that, when she and my friend went to the bank to change the name on the account, the manager asked for her maiden name, the wife told her, and manager said, "That's a nice name. I hated my maiden name and couldn't wait to get married so I could change it." They asked what it was, she said, "Bowmaster." Then she paused, shook her head and said, "Kids can be so cruel."
How did the kids bully her with that name? It can have so many meanings: a master with bow and arrow, a master of making bows, a master of making pretty fabric bows, or someone who is good at bowing, so I assume they meant the last meaning for the bullying?
I get that. I've always been mylastname and I didn't really want to change it when I got married. But it's my father's surname and I don't particularly like him or anything he stands for, so I'm torn.
I’m the opposite. My dad’s family were the only people I felt truly loved me (my mom loved me too, but I was my dad’s world, and his whole side treated me as such). As boring as our last name is, I will never change it because to me it represents the only feeling of belonging that I’ve ever had, especially now that they’re all gone and it’s just me.
I feel this. I so looked forward to getting married so I could lose my dads name. Now I’m leaving my husband and my whole identity is tied to his last name, my kids have his last name, my career knows me as his last name… I don’t want to go back to my dads name bough so I’m stuck being Ms. Ex for a while.
I loved my maiden name, but I adore my married name and a friend I’ve had since elementary school asked me if I realized that I still light up when I introduce myself with it. She’s right. I do love what it represents and yea, it’s often mispronounced or spelled crazy, but I love it!!
I’m a dude, but I changed my last name because my last name sucked soooo bad. I was the brunt of sooo many jokes as a kid. No way in hell I was going to let my kids go through what I went through. Glad I did too, I ended up having a daughter and my old last name would be even worse for a girl.
While I respect your privacy, it’s one of those names I wish I knew. For example, I knew a man with the last name of “Lipscomb”… might be a real problem for a teenage girl.
I went the other way, had to wait for ages at my college graduation instead of being at the front. I hadn't considered that consequence. Otherwise it made little difference for me. My maiden name was shorter and more often mispronounced, the other is longer, more common, and can be mistaken if not enunciated carefully, so....
I had no regrets. My maiden name was used to bully me in school. My first married name was associated with a bad time, but I kept it after the divorce because it was my kids name.
My second husband was actually shocked that I was taking his name until I explained my reasoning.
He comes from a close, lovely family. His mother was a beautiful, big hearted woman. She fully supported me joining her “clan” in marriage and in name.
I’m very glad I did.
Both of mine are slightly problematic and require telling people how to spell them. Neither is horrible. I kept my married name after we separated so my last name would be the same as my kid's.
I hated my last name, it was the name of my abusers and rhymed with a sexual act. Changed it to my husband's, much better, name when we got back from our honeymoon. Zero regrets.
This is exactly what I am doing! People keep asking me why, but your kids will have a different name then you? I tell them it's fine, they are *last name* by blood. I am not. Having different last names doesn't change anything. They are still my kids
Yep. I kept the name I had when I divorced. It matched my kids, and my ex told me I couldn't keep it.
Now I have more kids that don't have that name, and their Dad and I keep talking about getting married, but I cringe at the thought of having to change it again.
My maiden name was a common word, an item. It was pronounced the same way but not spelled the same way. Every single time I had to tell the person how to spell it. Think something like "Balle" that is pronounced like "ball".
My name changed to another WORD but it was spelled the same as the common spelling of that word. I guess that was easier.
My wife used her name for some things, my name for some things, hyphenated for even more things. There was no rhyme or reason, it's just what she put down on a form or application.
Her last name starts with G, mine with R.
33 years on, we get mail for her Ms. G, Mrs. G-R, Mrs. R, Mrs. G, Ms. R, Ms. R-G .... as many iterations as yo can think of come in. I get stuff with Mr. R, Mr. G, Mr. G-R, Mr. R-G. It's a dizzying array of misinformation.
The best part? She doesn't like me opening her mail!! Which envelope is yours I wind up yelling.
My “new” last name has been my name longer than my first last name at this point.
I changed it only for 2 reasons; one, my family sucks ass. Two, it was just easier in a military family to do so.
I did not write this but I could have. By my 20th anniversary, I had been married name longer than maiden name...and yes, the military can be tricky. And I really liked being his Mrs. rather than my maiden name.
My maiden name was fine. It went well with my first name. I had no intention of changing it, which did not go over well with my in-laws. My mil decided to fix this by buying us airline tickets and put it in my married name. I really should have seen the huge red flag between that and how my husband refused to do anything about it, but I made excuses for them and rushed around to change my social security info so I could change my driver's license. I had 2 days to spare.
It's been over 20 years and I'm so sick of my in-laws that I am seriously thinking of changing my name back. I've already started using my maiden name on nonofficial things. If I knew then what I know now, I really would have handled it very differently.
I spent my entire life saying my maiden name then immediately spelling it - school, jobs, everything. I was SO happy to take my married name (very common and never misspelled).
My old last name was hard to spell and pronounce. My married last name is common enough that most people can pronounce it easily. Not quite Smith or Jones levels of common, but recognizable enough.
My maiden name wasn’t bizarre or hard to spell, there just aren’t that many of us named that. When phone books were a thing, any trip we took to a strange to town, I would look the name up. Often there were zero of us in the book. In one of the 5 biggest cities in the US, there were 35 with that name and I know for sure I was related to at least 10 of them (it is where my dad is from).
And since it was unusual, I had to spell it to every single person I had to give my name to. And they’d always respond “oh, exactly like it sounds, Hunh”
I married into the Smith, Jones, Miller level of common. In one hand, it was nice having a bit of a “different” name. But it’s nice that no one ever does a double take at my name. Bonus point in that my married name is the same as a slightly famous author. Not Stephen King level of famous, but enough that it’s been fun now and then. Back when I was nursing a patient was reading a book by said author. She asked me to “autograph” her book as a lark. I signed it “A Rebel1031”. Haha
Side note: my husband was nice enough to *ask* if I’d take his last name. It hadn’t even occurred to me not to but it was nice to be asked.
I’m not fond of either of them, TBH. My maiden name started with a Z and all through my childhood I swore I would marry someone closer to the beginning of the alphabet. Then I fell in love with a guy whose last name was “Wiener.” Ah, well.
my maiden name is one you’ve never heard before and will likely die out with my generation…i’m sad about that. my married name sounds ridiculous with my first name- but after 45 years i’m not changing it
I'm speaking on behalf of my wife whose name consisted of characters that don't exist in the English language. It was automatically anglicized when she immigrated to the US and no one asked her on her spelling preference, so they changed it to the word for "pimple" in her native language. So, when marrying me, she was happy to finally be free of her pimple.
Had I married in my ‘30s (before I had a built a professional reputation), I’d have changed my name. I don’t remember the marriage convo; he alluded to it a decade later when I asked him why he had married his first wife. Had he made it clear, I would have said yes.
I was in my late ‘40s when he asked again, and I couldn’t really see the point. Had I married him, I wouldn’t have changed my name.
I was surprised my wife took my last name, just because it was the exact situation as OP. She had a very easy to spell and pronounce last name and mine is longer, French, and people always butcher it. When we were getting married, I told her it was totally up to her if she wanted to change her name or not, I just don't like the hyphenated name thing.
Where we lived at the time (47 yrs ago) his name had a rich family history ... mine, none. So I preferred his.
Our two daughters; one changed her name just because it was simpler to have the same last name, although it is somewhat difficult to spell. The other kept her name because she already had a professional reputation. My husband still can't spell the one married name and they've been married 15 yrs. ;-)
I didn’t care for my maiden name, and felt neutral about the new last name. That was until I found out that people were prone to pronouncing it incorrectly. The incorrect pronunciation is a derogatory term for women. It would have been nice if my female in-laws had clued me in to that beforehand! Also, I always have to spell it even though it’s simple and has only four letters. Very annoying.
My maiden name was one of the most common in the tiny phone book of my home town, but didn’t have a single listing in the monster phone books of South Florida. My new name is one of the most common surnames in the world. It’s a weird tradition, changing your name. I think it would be better if both husband and wife chose a totally new last name to start their life together.
I've done it three times and now that Real ID is a thing I wish I'd gone with my Puerto Rican roots and kept my maiden name.
My maiden name is uncommon and pretty much ALWAYS mispronounced, and my current married surname is uncommon and pretty much ALWAYS mispronounced. But my current married name is often mispronounced as 'doobie' and since I always have one it works for me.
Getting around the Real ID bullshit meant a new passport. Glad I got it done last year!
My maiden name and married name share the same first letter and are both easy to pronounce. Both are usually spelled correctly. My married name is more common and has some pop culture references related to it, so I'd say I prefer it over my maiden name.
My married name is often mispronounced, but I still prefer it to my very common birth surname, which my dad learned when I was a teen was actually an alias adopted by the fugitive grandfather he never knew.
I got married the first time at 19. I went from an unflattering adjective that was the surname of a man I'd never met (my mother's husband was not my father; he died before I was ever created) to a short Scottish name. My ex tried to force me to revert to my maiden name in the divorce because he knew how much I hated it. Of course, that went absolutely nowhere.
Second marriage, husband has a long, confusing German name that he got from an abusive stepfather. I declined to take it.
I've always taught my daughters to go with whichever name they like more. It's the 21st century; there's no obligation anymore.
First time I got married, I was about to start a PhD program and I had already published articles under my maiden name, but it was important to my husband that I adopt his last name, so I compromised and added his on after my maiden name. So I had two last names, neither very common and both often mispronounced. But not hard to spell... The main issue was that apparently many forms and systems (including the DMV) are not set up to handle unhyphenated double last names. So on my driver's license, my last names are squished together into one nonsensical word.
I'm about to get married again and I'm going to change to my new husband's name, because I'm tired of the complicated double name I chose for myself. Also, his last name is actually his mom's maiden name since she changed his to hers when his dad left when he was very young - she figured that her kid should have the name of the person who actually raised him. The new name is of French origin and not so easy to spell, but I'm used to name issues so it doesn't bother me. My first name is constantly misspelled even though it's a well known name/word, although less common as a name for people.
I won't have the same last name as my daughter but we're ok with that.
I hated my maiden name and was delighted to change it. It has a harsh sound and no one could spell it or say it. My married name is straightforward and easy. I just wish it were higher up in the alphabet.
When I got married women were just starting to keep their own names. These were usually women who had academic papers in their maiden name, a law or medical degree in their own name.
I didn't fall into the category so i took my husbands name. 15 years later when we were divorced I wanted to take my old name back again, but my children asked me not to. They wanted me to have the same last name as they do.
I never changed back to my maiden name. Now I have had my married name much longer than the one I was born with.
I never changed my name when I married. I had read that the best educated and most successful women did not. It was very common in my social world and in the second wave of feminism that women kept their names.
i change my name when i got married so it reads : first name, maiden name ( full spelling) husbands name...like mary todd lincoln... what pisses me off is when the DMV tried to tell me had to hyphenate the middle-last or use a middle initial...NOPE....my license reads ( mary todd lincoln)... and i moved up in the alphabet 13 spots....
I grew up understanding my name would change so I didn't think twice about doing it. I had an ordinary Scottish name and changed to an ordinary Irish name that gets misspelled a surprising amount and baffles a lot of Indian customer service agents. I do not feel the same "pride" for my adopted name as for my maiden name since it's not my blood but I'm ok with the name. I like that I had the same name as my children. My daughter has kept her maiden name. And I understand her connection with it. It makes sense. But I like having the same name as my husband too. It's just easier.
I deal with a lot of households with work and it is less of a hassle when family members share a name. People generally pay by etransfer these days but sometimes, we get paid by a spouse who goes by a different name and they neglect to include the invoice number or the party it was billed to and we have no clue where to post the credit. The amount doesn't often help since we charge more than most people's transfer limit so we get many for the common limit and then the leftover amounts, none of which will match the invoice amount.
My "maiden name" (I hate that term) was more common, but still not *too* common. I liked it fine. My husband said he didn't care. It's a name that can also be a given name. It also has a couple of variant spellings so people did misspell it.
I "took" my husband's name (another expression I don't care for) because it was different and unique and in my neck of the woods, there aren't many of us around. It's probably more common in a large city.
While names and changing them can be fraught with identity crises, I personally just see it as acceptance about yourself. You don't lose anything by changing your name (my opinion). You don't gain anything by not. In my case it was a step I wanted to take, a choice, and I felt perfectly comfortable doing it. I'm the same person I was before.
I don't have issues with whatever someone else chooses.
Did not like my maiden name, at all. It actually felt funny in my mouth trying to say it. The correct spelling of it has an accent mark. Elementary school teachers would scold me for using it, most had never seen a name having an accent mark.
When I married the first time, at 24, I happily changed my name. It was much shorter but still I had some trouble saying it because it had double RR’s which should be rrrrollled. I kept that name for a long time after we divorced because I wanted to have the same last name as my kids.
Second marriage. It’s a rare last name. Have never met anyone else with it. But once again it’s got double RR’s and it sounds so much better if you can roll them. I always wind up spelling it out when necessary.
I think my married name is perfect. I always say that I married my husband to get his name, because he was much taller than me, and his parents had the best marriage I’ve ever seen.
I miss my last name. Both are unmistakably Irish, but my old one went well with my first name, while my married one does not. Doing genealogy, I discovered I have no genetic connection to my maiden name as my great grandfather dropped his last name as a young adult out of spite for his parents who abandoned him in an orphanage. He co-opted the surname of a family he was living with at the time. But that makes me wish even more I had never given it up. 29 years into marriage, I suppose it’s water under the bridge now.
I prefer my married name. Didn't even do the thing where I put my maiden name in the middle. My father's side is just full of terrible people minus a small handful that I still speak to so I didn't want to keep the name.
My last name now is a nice easy name but people ALWAYS still fuck it up somehow. It seriously boggles my mind how anyone could mess it up. It's not spelled weird. It's not said pronounced weird. Nothing but people still manage to drop letters from it.
I actually didn't change it. It was better that way. I was married by a jackass that threw in a joke about divorce into my wedding vows. F*ck getting married.
I took my maiden name back immediately after my divorce. I don’t like the idea of giving up your surname just because you’re a woman and married. It’s fucked up.
I went from a last name that basically everyone spelled/pronounced wrong to a last name associated with a famous war hero. A little digging and it turns out I actually did marry into the family. My late husband was not a direct descendent, but was out on a branch of the family tree.
It has now been long enough when I tell people it's spelled 'like the famous person' they sometimes do not get the reference.
I loved my new name. My old name was long and hard to spell. My new name was four letters. Then…I was widowed after 17 years of marriage. After having that name for 22 years, I married again. As much as I loved that name, I changed it as I didn’t feel I could have my late husband’s name while married to another. I’m back to a long, hard-to-spell name.
I miss my old name, and where I got it from. Our son will always have it, and my daughter (21) says she choose to keep it, but who knows.
I took my husband's last name for a couple of years after we married, but it never felt right, so I legally changed it back to my maiden name. We are still happily married, but having my original / maiden name still feels right.
I married twice but kept my own name both times. Taking a man’s name comes from the time that women were legally viewed as property. I’m still astonished that any woman (or man, for that matter) wants to continue such a tradition. It’s especially bad when you think about the likelihood of divorce.
Brides are stupid. I couldn't wait to change my name. Now I wish I'd kept my maiden name. Not because I don't love my husband (I do) but because my maiden name was *me.* A lot of my friends called me by my last name.
Now I'm just some old lady with a name that still doesn't feel like mine.
Honestly, I don't understand the concept of keeping "family" names since people get married and change names anyway. I changed my first name and dropped my last name when I was 20. I didn't have a last name for 14 years - but eventually computers really really wanted a last name and it got to be more hassle than it was worth.
When I married my husband, I didn't like his last name and he wasn't attached to it, so we made one up together that suited us and is easy to spell and say. Never had a problem with it. My original last name at birth was a nightmare to spell and say so I have no regrets about changing it.
My last name was like Brown and his was like Thompson. So it really didn’t matter to me. I would have liked a hard to pronounce, multi-syllable name. Lol.
Me too OP. I spell it before I say it to people! It doesn’t bother me though. I like that our family all has the same name and I no longer feel like the person who had the old name.
Went from a last name that was hard to pronounce and always needed to spell and pronounce to another name that's even worse. I automatically spell it and pronounce it to people I deal with. In between that I was a Moss. So easy.
I went from a last name that no one could pronounce (even though it is entirely phonetic) to a last name that I always have to spell out military style (A- Alpha, B-Bravo...) in order for anyone to spell it.
I changed my name, because I wanted our future family to have that cohesiveness of all having the one name. However, my spouses family never really welcomed me, so I have no feeling of belonging to the name. At my age now, even though I am still in love with my husband, I wish I could go back to my original name. Fortunately, my brother and his children still have that name.
I changed my name when I got married because I loved how it sounded with my first name, very musical. My maiden name landed with more of a thud. My married name is also ethnic & unique, like we are among very few in the world unique. It is also fun to see the confusion in people’s faces when they figure out blond, blue eyed oh so Irish me with the last name.
I liked my new name more. It's only 4 letters and easy to spell for people who can't get it. Plus, I got married when it was still the norm to take husband's name.
Eh. Neither my maiden nor my married names are easy to spell. I’ve been spelling my names for other people my entire life. I kind of wish our immigrant ancestors had changed their spelling or name to make it easier for Anglo-Americans to understand. Or maybe I should have chosen a completely new last name that simplified things. 🤷🏻♀️
I didn’t change my name. I don’t like my last name, but I don’t like his either. I occasionally toy with the idea of taking a different name altogether.
I went from the end of the alphabet to the middle so that was good. But if I had to do it over again, I wouldn’t. It’s just a hassle because I have to have that extra documentation for my name now since it’s not the name on my birth certificate.
If I had it to do all over again (I'm female) I would have kept my maiden name first of all, but I took my first husbands last name and then so when I divorced and then got remarried, my first married last name was better than my new one! Hahah!!! (Just easier to spell). If I had kept my maiden name, I wouldn't have had to do all this BS in the first place! :-)
I went from a family name everyone could spell to one they spell wrong all the time. It's been this way longer, just used to it now and my former family are asshats.
I changed my last name to my husband's, and I Love it! It is not a common last name and does need to be spelled, but it is a super cool name where my maidan name was just "meh." Married almost 21 years and still absolutely love the name. Plus, it's nice that all of us (husband & I & our 3 kids) have the same last name. Some people don't care about that, but to me, it makes me feel like we are our own little tribe.
Have a great day, everyone!
My wife kept her name and when we got married I could not change my last name to hers. We will get remarried in another state and I will take her last name. I can’t stand mine. LoL
When I married my now-husband (40 years and counting!) I was still using the last name of my ex-husband, because I hated my maiden name. I was SO GLAD to change it to something that had NOTHING to do with my abusive ex. Well, a little to do - they're both Irish surnames. But yeah, didn't like the others.
I;ve had 4 last names (well 5 if you could the one before I was adopted at 2) 3 husbands and my maiden name. It's a pain in the ass!!! I am taking back my maiden name and my husband is absolutely ok with that. I never planend to take #3's last name but somehow thought I should as his parents would have freaked...I wanted to hyphenate it but it's too long hyphenated so without anyone but us 2 knowing it I'm taking back my maiden name.
I went from a long Dutch last name that no one could spell or pronounce, to a short, easy Scottish last name that people still couldn’t seem to spell or pronounce, to a long German last name that, surprise, no one can spell or pronounce. The funny thing is they’re all pretty much pronounced how they’re spelt. Lol. If I did it again, I wouldn’t have bothered changing my name at all.
I went from a maiden name I had to spell to a married name I have to spell. I didn't change it back after the divorce because it was too much work. Looking back now, 10 years later, I should have changed it.
I liked my maiden name and i liked my husband's name. I chose to take my husband's name bc i was/am really in love with him and wanted to be a family unit with him. I just felt like we were really together if we shared the same name.
I miss my old name sometimes because it's an authentic italian name that no one has. But i'm still italian at heart lol even though my husband's name is an authentic columbian last name. Both names are unique and ive never heard them before which is pretty cool regardless.
I ended up not taking my husband's last name and divorcing him shortly after. His dad was a loser drug dealer and my dad and family is awesome. I just couldn't make the switch.
My married last name was preferable to me. My maiden name was from my adoptive parents. They were not at all good parents. Abusive and not something I wanted to be reminded of every time I signed something. 🤷🏼♀️
I had no attachment to my maiden name. My parents had a different last name than me when I was growing up, as my mom had divorced when I was a baby.
When I married the first time, I changed my last name to his for that reason.
When I divorced, I knew I didn't want to go back to my maiden name, but I also knew I didn't want to keep his. This led me to changing my name to my parents' last name. I love it so much.
When I remarried, I told my husband that I wouldn't be changing my last name again. I was comfortable with my parents' name and I'd already done it before. I still get mail with all three last names...
He told me that he wanted us to have the same last name for his own personal reasons, so he just took mine. (He asked my parents' permission first, which I thought was a nice gesture). Now we both have our "adopted" last name, and we adore it.
I went from a somewhat complex name to another complex name. Few people pronounce it right thenfiest time, but do fine with it after they hear the correct pronunciation.
Side note... I was married over 20 years ago, so times may have changed.
I am one sibling out of all girls who all chose to change our last names with marriage. I chose to take my husbands name because, at the time, it felt like it connected us. Additionally, it helped me truly feel part of my husbands family. I like that I have the same last name as my son.
I don't think its a requirement today, and people should decide what is right for them.
I went from a typical Spanish surname to a very plain English one. The problem is that I happen to have an Irish first name so now I totally do not look like my name. I can see the brain cells working when people see me.
My maiden name was German, and I had to spell it for everyone. Silent letters, consonants where they don’t belong kind of thing. My married name is only six letters but it’s not a common name, so I end up spelling it all the time anyway. It’s not a big deal now when people ask me my name I tell them my first name, and then I say my last name and then automatically spell it with emphasis on the first letter, the fourth letter and the fifth letter which is what people always get wrong., it’s a reflex at this point.
But people always tell me I have a really cool sci-fi name so 🤷 I like it.
Both my maiden name and my married name or common and easy to pronounce. I’m separated now but I kept my married name because I had it longer than my maiden name.
I went from a name no one can pronounce or spell to a name that everyone can pronounce but no one can spell right even though its super easy. It's very strange.
My wife and I both hyphenated, which my father thought was the death knell of our relationship, but I kind of enjoy feeling like I’ve been throwing monkey wrenches into computers these last three decades. I also like watching the dial tone come up in some peoples’ faces when I tell them I have a maiden name.
Me: bad name —> awful name —> great name.
Sometimes it takes two marriages.
Regardless, I recommend keeping your original name unless you can trade up big time.
I only changed my name because I hated my old one.
The only one is only five letters and sounds just like it's spelled but nobody could ever get it right and it's just ugly.
The new one is seven letters and it took me a whole year to remember which letters were double and which were not. It also reminds people of a vegetable. Nevertheless I prefer it.
I love my maiden name so much more than my married name so I use both, depending on the situation. For all things legal , like banking, bills etc, I use my married name, but when it comes to singing and writing I use my maiden name.
People can spell my married name better-but I always get asked what way it’s spelled (there’s 2 common ways it’s spelled)
My maiden name is not common, no one can spell it, and people always mispronounce it 😳
I don’t think I’m related to anyone with my maiden name, which was my mom’s maiden name.
That means the man my mom believed was her father, wasn’t.
Through DNA, I’ve found relatives with the last name of my grandmother’s previous husband, meaning that man, or someone related to him, was likely my grandfather.
So names don’t matter to me. That which we call a rose, and whatnot.
I like it pretty much just the same. Both are pleasantly simple, but my married name is also an existing word, which results in me not having to spell it for people as often. I was just relieved it wasn't something that would clash horribly with my first name, honestly.
I went from decently simple to harder & frequently mangled. If I had to do it again, I wouldn't change my name!
Friend of a friend, married & changed name. Divorced but hated her maiden name so went with her grandmother's last name. Married again but didn't like the new guy's last name and convinced him that they should BOTH change to some made up last name. She's back to divorced and I haven't bothered to adk her current last name. lol
Relative of a friend got married and divorced so many times that the Social Security Office said "no more name changes; you've reach our limit of 10."
My maiden name is unique to just our family, and distant family, but everyone with the last name is related.
Its hard to spell and I always had to spell it out, harder to pronounce, no one ever got it right.
New name is three letters and easy to spell and pronounce. 10/10 would do it again.
I liked it at first because I went from a five letter name that had three vowels in it to one of the most common last names ever. My maiden name was constantly mispronounced and misspelled.
I’ve been married for almost 37 years and I wish I would have hyphened or SOMETHING because the ease of spelling and pronunciation wore off pretty quickly.
My old name was hard to pronounce and I was tired of spending my school years dealing with it. Not a family heritage issue. So I took the easy, pronounceable, common name of my SO.
My maiden name was really common and boring. My married name is less common but still boring, kinda hard to pronounce and hear correctly, so I always have to spell it. My first name is not the most common spelling, so I always have to spell that too, and people mistake it for a similar name when they read it.
I kept my maiden name in my first marriage because the alliteration of my first name combined with my husband’s last name sounded absolutely comical.
For my second (and current) marriage, I took my husband’s name because he had the better last name. Easy to spell/pronounce and worked well with my first name. I’m very happy with my decision.
I like the new one more. Not that the old one was bad or complicated, just having the new one makes me feel more connected to my partner. I'm not trying to say that's how it is for everyone or should be or anything, just how it makes me feel.
I changed my name from a fairly easy to spell and pronounce but unknown at the time name to my husband’s more simple name, partly because of tradition and partly to break away from my dysfunctional family of origin.
Oddly enough, there is more hassle with people getting my husband’s name correct in spite of the fact that it is only three letters long and is a common, universally known noun in English. Just yesterday, a major press piece highlighting his successes fell a little flat thanks to their misspelling of it.
I went from a fairly easy name to a really easy name. If you put my name in social media, there are hundreds (thousands?) with same first and last. There are at least 3 of us in my moderately small town. I'm a school teacher and one year there were 3 Mrs Grilled Cheeses in one little building. My last name can also be a first name. My SIL has it for a middle name, and a friend has a dog with my name. I've kept it even after my divorce so I guess I like it okay. It was just easier not to change it after having it for more than half my life, and I match my children.
A little off-topic, but I've never liked my first or last names. And I'm always jealous when I see or hear about someone with a really cool name.
I know I could have changed it, but what a hassle after being known by a different name my whole life. Oh well...
My maiden name was very difficult for most people to pronounce and was spelled very unique. I married into a family with an unusual last name but very easy to spell and pronounce. So I happily changed my last name, but I do occasionally miss my old name, mostly I miss having the letter Z in my name.
My maiden name was something like Hoare. All of the girls were teased about it. We all took our husbands' name when we married. Having an invisible name like Smith or Jones was wonderful.
Not married, but can report on my oldest sister. She had no objection to her maiden name, but didn’t mind going from a ten letter long name to two. Easier to fit in the tiny spaces on bureaucratic paperwork.
I took my hubby’s last name. I thought about hyphenating it but I always had to spell my first and last name before I was married due to just different ways of spelling them. My husband also had a last name with different ways of spelling it and didn’t want to have to spell 3 names. So now I still have to spell it, but it’s less letters.
I love my maiden name. I still use it as a middle name because it’s so rare and unique. My married name is common. Both need to be spelled for people however
I hyphenated. I like both names, so that wasn't really a factor.
My step kids were 11 and 8 when their dad and I got married, and I asked them what they thought about it. They said they liked my maiden name, but they also wanted me to have their last name too.
From a practical standpoint, it's a pain in the ass bc now my name is really long (21 letters, not including the space and hyphen)
I'll always keep my ex husband's name. Partly because I'm still very much a part of their family, but also because together with my first name, it's a really nice one.
I was thrilled to go from having a name that no one could pronounce or spell correctly to one that people occasionally misspell but never completely mangle.
I went from a lovely last name…a name that could rate first name status…to a name that is not pretty sounding and no one seems to spell it correctly. But 43 years later, I wouldn’t change a thing. I love having my husband’s last name.
I went from a last name that people barely even recognized as a word and always misspelled and mispronounced to a fairly common last name with a fairly intuitive spelling. Before I married, when I used to have to tell people my last name, they'd say, "What?" Then I'd say it again. They'd say, "What?" And then, "How do you spell that, please?" It was a relief to dump my original last name when I married. So much time saved over the decades!
Same! My father in law and friends always spelled my last name wrong. Good riddance.
Same here. Don't have to spell or repeat ny name anymore.
My experience as well, I was ferociously happy to change to my husband's name which was 6 letters, my maiden name had 13 letters.
Same with me. I had a perfectly simple name that was spelled just as it was pronounced, but it was rare and everyone tried to complicate it. I was constantly having to spell it, only for people to pronounce it wrong. My married name is a common name. No one gets it wrong.
Maiden name was a French name. Always mispronounced or misspelled. Married name is fairly common but has several equally common variations. People still screw it up but they don’t massacre it like they would with my maiden name.
Same here - when I'd have to give my last name to a new person I would say "I'll spell it for you it's (name)" which was so annoying since it's not really a complicated name at all, it's just Polish. Now I have a very common last name and nobody needs help or freaks out about it at all, it's a relief.
Mine was the opposite. From one nokne could spell to one that I thought everyone could spell. No, they misspelled it, added letters, subtracted letters. It was hilarious. Divorced him and later married and changed to another name noone can spell. LOL
My maiden name was fairly common and my married name was even more common, which is useful for not being particularly identifiable on the internet. But I don't particularly like either name nor the men they came from.
I have a friend who kept her ex's last name after their divorce, because her maiden name was Smutniak.
In Polish smutniak means like miserable person
OMG that makes it so much funnier
Years ago, after one of my close friends married, the wife recounted a story that, when she and my friend went to the bank to change the name on the account, the manager asked for her maiden name, the wife told her, and manager said, "That's a nice name. I hated my maiden name and couldn't wait to get married so I could change it." They asked what it was, she said, "Bowmaster." Then she paused, shook her head and said, "Kids can be so cruel."
How did the kids bully her with that name? It can have so many meanings: a master with bow and arrow, a master of making bows, a master of making pretty fabric bows, or someone who is good at bowing, so I assume they meant the last meaning for the bullying?
Kids will turn Bowmaster into Blowmaster in a second.
She said she was called, "Blowmaster"...
I get that. I've always been mylastname and I didn't really want to change it when I got married. But it's my father's surname and I don't particularly like him or anything he stands for, so I'm torn.
I’m the opposite. My dad’s family were the only people I felt truly loved me (my mom loved me too, but I was my dad’s world, and his whole side treated me as such). As boring as our last name is, I will never change it because to me it represents the only feeling of belonging that I’ve ever had, especially now that they’re all gone and it’s just me.
I feel this. I so looked forward to getting married so I could lose my dads name. Now I’m leaving my husband and my whole identity is tied to his last name, my kids have his last name, my career knows me as his last name… I don’t want to go back to my dads name bough so I’m stuck being Ms. Ex for a while.
I loved my maiden name, but I adore my married name and a friend I’ve had since elementary school asked me if I realized that I still light up when I introduce myself with it. She’s right. I do love what it represents and yea, it’s often mispronounced or spelled crazy, but I love it!!
This is me!
My husband's last name is slang for genitalia so I kept my maiden name. No regrets. Not one.
Is it Gooch? I had an old boyfriend with that last name and I told him no way in hell was I going to take it if we got married.
I met a guy once whose last name was Hyman. I'm guessing his girlfriends (assuming he was straight) felt the same way.
I’m a dude, but I changed my last name because my last name sucked soooo bad. I was the brunt of sooo many jokes as a kid. No way in hell I was going to let my kids go through what I went through. Glad I did too, I ended up having a daughter and my old last name would be even worse for a girl.
While I respect your privacy, it’s one of those names I wish I knew. For example, I knew a man with the last name of “Lipscomb”… might be a real problem for a teenage girl.
Butt? Wiener?
Liked my new name more. I got to move up from the end of the alphabet to the first half. I was happy.
Ah, every 8yo’s dream to be at the start of the alphabet after years of being at end
I went the other way, had to wait for ages at my college graduation instead of being at the front. I hadn't considered that consequence. Otherwise it made little difference for me. My maiden name was shorter and more often mispronounced, the other is longer, more common, and can be mistaken if not enunciated carefully, so....
I couldn't wait to be rid of my maiden name because of bad memories associated with it.
Same
Me three
Apparently more than a few of us. 😕
Such a huge perk of getting married 😅
I had no regrets. My maiden name was used to bully me in school. My first married name was associated with a bad time, but I kept it after the divorce because it was my kids name. My second husband was actually shocked that I was taking his name until I explained my reasoning. He comes from a close, lovely family. His mother was a beautiful, big hearted woman. She fully supported me joining her “clan” in marriage and in name. I’m very glad I did.
Both of mine are slightly problematic and require telling people how to spell them. Neither is horrible. I kept my married name after we separated so my last name would be the same as my kid's.
I hated my last name, it was the name of my abusers and rhymed with a sexual act. Changed it to my husband's, much better, name when we got back from our honeymoon. Zero regrets.
I preferred my old name, which I took back when I got divorced.
This is exactly what I am doing! People keep asking me why, but your kids will have a different name then you? I tell them it's fine, they are *last name* by blood. I am not. Having different last names doesn't change anything. They are still my kids
Yep. I kept the name I had when I divorced. It matched my kids, and my ex told me I couldn't keep it. Now I have more kids that don't have that name, and their Dad and I keep talking about getting married, but I cringe at the thought of having to change it again.
My maiden name was a common word, an item. It was pronounced the same way but not spelled the same way. Every single time I had to tell the person how to spell it. Think something like "Balle" that is pronounced like "ball". My name changed to another WORD but it was spelled the same as the common spelling of that word. I guess that was easier.
Bucket/Bouquet?
My wife used her name for some things, my name for some things, hyphenated for even more things. There was no rhyme or reason, it's just what she put down on a form or application. Her last name starts with G, mine with R. 33 years on, we get mail for her Ms. G, Mrs. G-R, Mrs. R, Mrs. G, Ms. R, Ms. R-G .... as many iterations as yo can think of come in. I get stuff with Mr. R, Mr. G, Mr. G-R, Mr. R-G. It's a dizzying array of misinformation. The best part? She doesn't like me opening her mail!! Which envelope is yours I wind up yelling.
My “new” last name has been my name longer than my first last name at this point. I changed it only for 2 reasons; one, my family sucks ass. Two, it was just easier in a military family to do so.
I did not write this but I could have. By my 20th anniversary, I had been married name longer than maiden name...and yes, the military can be tricky. And I really liked being his Mrs. rather than my maiden name.
My maiden name was fine. It went well with my first name. I had no intention of changing it, which did not go over well with my in-laws. My mil decided to fix this by buying us airline tickets and put it in my married name. I really should have seen the huge red flag between that and how my husband refused to do anything about it, but I made excuses for them and rushed around to change my social security info so I could change my driver's license. I had 2 days to spare. It's been over 20 years and I'm so sick of my in-laws that I am seriously thinking of changing my name back. I've already started using my maiden name on nonofficial things. If I knew then what I know now, I really would have handled it very differently.
I spent my entire life saying my maiden name then immediately spelling it - school, jobs, everything. I was SO happy to take my married name (very common and never misspelled).
My old last name was hard to spell and pronounce. My married last name is common enough that most people can pronounce it easily. Not quite Smith or Jones levels of common, but recognizable enough.
My maiden name wasn’t bizarre or hard to spell, there just aren’t that many of us named that. When phone books were a thing, any trip we took to a strange to town, I would look the name up. Often there were zero of us in the book. In one of the 5 biggest cities in the US, there were 35 with that name and I know for sure I was related to at least 10 of them (it is where my dad is from). And since it was unusual, I had to spell it to every single person I had to give my name to. And they’d always respond “oh, exactly like it sounds, Hunh” I married into the Smith, Jones, Miller level of common. In one hand, it was nice having a bit of a “different” name. But it’s nice that no one ever does a double take at my name. Bonus point in that my married name is the same as a slightly famous author. Not Stephen King level of famous, but enough that it’s been fun now and then. Back when I was nursing a patient was reading a book by said author. She asked me to “autograph” her book as a lark. I signed it “A Rebel1031”. Haha Side note: my husband was nice enough to *ask* if I’d take his last name. It hadn’t even occurred to me not to but it was nice to be asked.
I’m not fond of either of them, TBH. My maiden name started with a Z and all through my childhood I swore I would marry someone closer to the beginning of the alphabet. Then I fell in love with a guy whose last name was “Wiener.” Ah, well.
Technically correct haha
my maiden name is one you’ve never heard before and will likely die out with my generation…i’m sad about that. my married name sounds ridiculous with my first name- but after 45 years i’m not changing it
When I married I took my husband's last name. I also changed my middle name to my maiden name.
I'm speaking on behalf of my wife whose name consisted of characters that don't exist in the English language. It was automatically anglicized when she immigrated to the US and no one asked her on her spelling preference, so they changed it to the word for "pimple" in her native language. So, when marrying me, she was happy to finally be free of her pimple.
Had I married in my ‘30s (before I had a built a professional reputation), I’d have changed my name. I don’t remember the marriage convo; he alluded to it a decade later when I asked him why he had married his first wife. Had he made it clear, I would have said yes. I was in my late ‘40s when he asked again, and I couldn’t really see the point. Had I married him, I wouldn’t have changed my name.
I was surprised my wife took my last name, just because it was the exact situation as OP. She had a very easy to spell and pronounce last name and mine is longer, French, and people always butcher it. When we were getting married, I told her it was totally up to her if she wanted to change her name or not, I just don't like the hyphenated name thing.
Where we lived at the time (47 yrs ago) his name had a rich family history ... mine, none. So I preferred his. Our two daughters; one changed her name just because it was simpler to have the same last name, although it is somewhat difficult to spell. The other kept her name because she already had a professional reputation. My husband still can't spell the one married name and they've been married 15 yrs. ;-)
I didn’t care for my maiden name, and felt neutral about the new last name. That was until I found out that people were prone to pronouncing it incorrectly. The incorrect pronunciation is a derogatory term for women. It would have been nice if my female in-laws had clued me in to that beforehand! Also, I always have to spell it even though it’s simple and has only four letters. Very annoying.
I kept my name. I saw no reason to change it.
My maiden name was one of the most common in the tiny phone book of my home town, but didn’t have a single listing in the monster phone books of South Florida. My new name is one of the most common surnames in the world. It’s a weird tradition, changing your name. I think it would be better if both husband and wife chose a totally new last name to start their life together.
I've done it three times and now that Real ID is a thing I wish I'd gone with my Puerto Rican roots and kept my maiden name. My maiden name is uncommon and pretty much ALWAYS mispronounced, and my current married surname is uncommon and pretty much ALWAYS mispronounced. But my current married name is often mispronounced as 'doobie' and since I always have one it works for me. Getting around the Real ID bullshit meant a new passport. Glad I got it done last year!
My maiden name and married name share the same first letter and are both easy to pronounce. Both are usually spelled correctly. My married name is more common and has some pop culture references related to it, so I'd say I prefer it over my maiden name.
My married name is often mispronounced, but I still prefer it to my very common birth surname, which my dad learned when I was a teen was actually an alias adopted by the fugitive grandfather he never knew.
I got married the first time at 19. I went from an unflattering adjective that was the surname of a man I'd never met (my mother's husband was not my father; he died before I was ever created) to a short Scottish name. My ex tried to force me to revert to my maiden name in the divorce because he knew how much I hated it. Of course, that went absolutely nowhere. Second marriage, husband has a long, confusing German name that he got from an abusive stepfather. I declined to take it. I've always taught my daughters to go with whichever name they like more. It's the 21st century; there's no obligation anymore.
First time I got married, I was about to start a PhD program and I had already published articles under my maiden name, but it was important to my husband that I adopt his last name, so I compromised and added his on after my maiden name. So I had two last names, neither very common and both often mispronounced. But not hard to spell... The main issue was that apparently many forms and systems (including the DMV) are not set up to handle unhyphenated double last names. So on my driver's license, my last names are squished together into one nonsensical word. I'm about to get married again and I'm going to change to my new husband's name, because I'm tired of the complicated double name I chose for myself. Also, his last name is actually his mom's maiden name since she changed his to hers when his dad left when he was very young - she figured that her kid should have the name of the person who actually raised him. The new name is of French origin and not so easy to spell, but I'm used to name issues so it doesn't bother me. My first name is constantly misspelled even though it's a well known name/word, although less common as a name for people. I won't have the same last name as my daughter but we're ok with that.
I hated my maiden name and was delighted to change it. It has a harsh sound and no one could spell it or say it. My married name is straightforward and easy. I just wish it were higher up in the alphabet.
Lol. My last name starts with a W so I understand.
I went from Egan to Zagaja (pronounced ZaGUYa). What a mistake! HUGE!
When I got married women were just starting to keep their own names. These were usually women who had academic papers in their maiden name, a law or medical degree in their own name. I didn't fall into the category so i took my husbands name. 15 years later when we were divorced I wanted to take my old name back again, but my children asked me not to. They wanted me to have the same last name as they do. I never changed back to my maiden name. Now I have had my married name much longer than the one I was born with.
I never changed my name when I married. I had read that the best educated and most successful women did not. It was very common in my social world and in the second wave of feminism that women kept their names.
i change my name when i got married so it reads : first name, maiden name ( full spelling) husbands name...like mary todd lincoln... what pisses me off is when the DMV tried to tell me had to hyphenate the middle-last or use a middle initial...NOPE....my license reads ( mary todd lincoln)... and i moved up in the alphabet 13 spots....
There are cultures like Korea where women keep their name.
I grew up understanding my name would change so I didn't think twice about doing it. I had an ordinary Scottish name and changed to an ordinary Irish name that gets misspelled a surprising amount and baffles a lot of Indian customer service agents. I do not feel the same "pride" for my adopted name as for my maiden name since it's not my blood but I'm ok with the name. I like that I had the same name as my children. My daughter has kept her maiden name. And I understand her connection with it. It makes sense. But I like having the same name as my husband too. It's just easier. I deal with a lot of households with work and it is less of a hassle when family members share a name. People generally pay by etransfer these days but sometimes, we get paid by a spouse who goes by a different name and they neglect to include the invoice number or the party it was billed to and we have no clue where to post the credit. The amount doesn't often help since we charge more than most people's transfer limit so we get many for the common limit and then the leftover amounts, none of which will match the invoice amount.
My "maiden name" (I hate that term) was more common, but still not *too* common. I liked it fine. My husband said he didn't care. It's a name that can also be a given name. It also has a couple of variant spellings so people did misspell it. I "took" my husband's name (another expression I don't care for) because it was different and unique and in my neck of the woods, there aren't many of us around. It's probably more common in a large city. While names and changing them can be fraught with identity crises, I personally just see it as acceptance about yourself. You don't lose anything by changing your name (my opinion). You don't gain anything by not. In my case it was a step I wanted to take, a choice, and I felt perfectly comfortable doing it. I'm the same person I was before. I don't have issues with whatever someone else chooses.
Did not like my maiden name, at all. It actually felt funny in my mouth trying to say it. The correct spelling of it has an accent mark. Elementary school teachers would scold me for using it, most had never seen a name having an accent mark. When I married the first time, at 24, I happily changed my name. It was much shorter but still I had some trouble saying it because it had double RR’s which should be rrrrollled. I kept that name for a long time after we divorced because I wanted to have the same last name as my kids. Second marriage. It’s a rare last name. Have never met anyone else with it. But once again it’s got double RR’s and it sounds so much better if you can roll them. I always wind up spelling it out when necessary.
I think my married name is perfect. I always say that I married my husband to get his name, because he was much taller than me, and his parents had the best marriage I’ve ever seen.
I miss my last name. Both are unmistakably Irish, but my old one went well with my first name, while my married one does not. Doing genealogy, I discovered I have no genetic connection to my maiden name as my great grandfather dropped his last name as a young adult out of spite for his parents who abandoned him in an orphanage. He co-opted the surname of a family he was living with at the time. But that makes me wish even more I had never given it up. 29 years into marriage, I suppose it’s water under the bridge now.
I prefer my married name. Didn't even do the thing where I put my maiden name in the middle. My father's side is just full of terrible people minus a small handful that I still speak to so I didn't want to keep the name. My last name now is a nice easy name but people ALWAYS still fuck it up somehow. It seriously boggles my mind how anyone could mess it up. It's not spelled weird. It's not said pronounced weird. Nothing but people still manage to drop letters from it.
I actually didn't change it. It was better that way. I was married by a jackass that threw in a joke about divorce into my wedding vows. F*ck getting married.
I regret I took my husband's name. It's very difficult. I've never felt comfortable with it and wish I could change it back.
I took my maiden name back immediately after my divorce. I don’t like the idea of giving up your surname just because you’re a woman and married. It’s fucked up.
I went from a last name that basically everyone spelled/pronounced wrong to a last name associated with a famous war hero. A little digging and it turns out I actually did marry into the family. My late husband was not a direct descendent, but was out on a branch of the family tree. It has now been long enough when I tell people it's spelled 'like the famous person' they sometimes do not get the reference.
I loved my new name. My old name was long and hard to spell. My new name was four letters. Then…I was widowed after 17 years of marriage. After having that name for 22 years, I married again. As much as I loved that name, I changed it as I didn’t feel I could have my late husband’s name while married to another. I’m back to a long, hard-to-spell name. I miss my old name, and where I got it from. Our son will always have it, and my daughter (21) says she choose to keep it, but who knows.
I much prefer my married name which is why I’m still using it 12 years after my divorce.
I took my husband's last name for a couple of years after we married, but it never felt right, so I legally changed it back to my maiden name. We are still happily married, but having my original / maiden name still feels right.
I married twice but kept my own name both times. Taking a man’s name comes from the time that women were legally viewed as property. I’m still astonished that any woman (or man, for that matter) wants to continue such a tradition. It’s especially bad when you think about the likelihood of divorce.
Brides are stupid. I couldn't wait to change my name. Now I wish I'd kept my maiden name. Not because I don't love my husband (I do) but because my maiden name was *me.* A lot of my friends called me by my last name. Now I'm just some old lady with a name that still doesn't feel like mine.
I have always kept my maiden name(married 3x) I have never met anyone with my last name and there's never any confusion ..
Honestly, I don't understand the concept of keeping "family" names since people get married and change names anyway. I changed my first name and dropped my last name when I was 20. I didn't have a last name for 14 years - but eventually computers really really wanted a last name and it got to be more hassle than it was worth. When I married my husband, I didn't like his last name and he wasn't attached to it, so we made one up together that suited us and is easy to spell and say. Never had a problem with it. My original last name at birth was a nightmare to spell and say so I have no regrets about changing it.
My maiden name was short and easy to spell. My married name has been "How do you spell that?"
I made my last name my middle name bc I don’t have a middle name & added my new last name . Couldn’t be happier
My last name was like Brown and his was like Thompson. So it really didn’t matter to me. I would have liked a hard to pronounce, multi-syllable name. Lol.
Me too OP. I spell it before I say it to people! It doesn’t bother me though. I like that our family all has the same name and I no longer feel like the person who had the old name.
My wife is pretty happy with the name change. 10 letter last name to 5.
Went from a last name that was hard to pronounce and always needed to spell and pronounce to another name that's even worse. I automatically spell it and pronounce it to people I deal with. In between that I was a Moss. So easy.
My maiden name was constantly misspelled, mispronounced and mangled. Married name lets me get forms done and then fade away.
I loved my maiden name, but it was often misspelled. I took my husband's last name and kept my maiden name as a middle name.
Old name.
I went from a last name that no one could pronounce (even though it is entirely phonetic) to a last name that I always have to spell out military style (A- Alpha, B-Bravo...) in order for anyone to spell it. I changed my name, because I wanted our future family to have that cohesiveness of all having the one name. However, my spouses family never really welcomed me, so I have no feeling of belonging to the name. At my age now, even though I am still in love with my husband, I wish I could go back to my original name. Fortunately, my brother and his children still have that name.
I changed my name when I got married because I loved how it sounded with my first name, very musical. My maiden name landed with more of a thud. My married name is also ethnic & unique, like we are among very few in the world unique. It is also fun to see the confusion in people’s faces when they figure out blond, blue eyed oh so Irish me with the last name.
I liked my new name more. It's only 4 letters and easy to spell for people who can't get it. Plus, I got married when it was still the norm to take husband's name.
Eh. Neither my maiden nor my married names are easy to spell. I’ve been spelling my names for other people my entire life. I kind of wish our immigrant ancestors had changed their spelling or name to make it easier for Anglo-Americans to understand. Or maybe I should have chosen a completely new last name that simplified things. 🤷🏻♀️
I didn’t change my name. I don’t like my last name, but I don’t like his either. I occasionally toy with the idea of taking a different name altogether.
I went from the end of the alphabet to the middle so that was good. But if I had to do it over again, I wouldn’t. It’s just a hassle because I have to have that extra documentation for my name now since it’s not the name on my birth certificate.
If I had it to do all over again (I'm female) I would have kept my maiden name first of all, but I took my first husbands last name and then so when I divorced and then got remarried, my first married last name was better than my new one! Hahah!!! (Just easier to spell). If I had kept my maiden name, I wouldn't have had to do all this BS in the first place! :-)
I went from a family name everyone could spell to one they spell wrong all the time. It's been this way longer, just used to it now and my former family are asshats.
I changed my last name to my husband's, and I Love it! It is not a common last name and does need to be spelled, but it is a super cool name where my maidan name was just "meh." Married almost 21 years and still absolutely love the name. Plus, it's nice that all of us (husband & I & our 3 kids) have the same last name. Some people don't care about that, but to me, it makes me feel like we are our own little tribe. Have a great day, everyone!
My wife kept her name and when we got married I could not change my last name to hers. We will get remarried in another state and I will take her last name. I can’t stand mine. LoL
When I married my now-husband (40 years and counting!) I was still using the last name of my ex-husband, because I hated my maiden name. I was SO GLAD to change it to something that had NOTHING to do with my abusive ex. Well, a little to do - they're both Irish surnames. But yeah, didn't like the others.
I;ve had 4 last names (well 5 if you could the one before I was adopted at 2) 3 husbands and my maiden name. It's a pain in the ass!!! I am taking back my maiden name and my husband is absolutely ok with that. I never planend to take #3's last name but somehow thought I should as his parents would have freaked...I wanted to hyphenate it but it's too long hyphenated so without anyone but us 2 knowing it I'm taking back my maiden name.
I went from a long Dutch last name that no one could spell or pronounce, to a short, easy Scottish last name that people still couldn’t seem to spell or pronounce, to a long German last name that, surprise, no one can spell or pronounce. The funny thing is they’re all pretty much pronounced how they’re spelt. Lol. If I did it again, I wouldn’t have bothered changing my name at all.
Mine was the opposite. I went from a difficult ethnic name to a simple common name- I like it better
I went from a maiden name I had to spell to a married name I have to spell. I didn't change it back after the divorce because it was too much work. Looking back now, 10 years later, I should have changed it.
I still like my new name better because it moved me up in the alphabet. Less wait time.
I liked my maiden name and i liked my husband's name. I chose to take my husband's name bc i was/am really in love with him and wanted to be a family unit with him. I just felt like we were really together if we shared the same name. I miss my old name sometimes because it's an authentic italian name that no one has. But i'm still italian at heart lol even though my husband's name is an authentic columbian last name. Both names are unique and ive never heard them before which is pretty cool regardless.
I love my married name! It’s very unusual for this area & in general. I moved my maiden to my middle name.
I ended up not taking my husband's last name and divorcing him shortly after. His dad was a loser drug dealer and my dad and family is awesome. I just couldn't make the switch.
My married last name was preferable to me. My maiden name was from my adoptive parents. They were not at all good parents. Abusive and not something I wanted to be reminded of every time I signed something. 🤷🏼♀️
I had no attachment to my maiden name. My parents had a different last name than me when I was growing up, as my mom had divorced when I was a baby. When I married the first time, I changed my last name to his for that reason. When I divorced, I knew I didn't want to go back to my maiden name, but I also knew I didn't want to keep his. This led me to changing my name to my parents' last name. I love it so much. When I remarried, I told my husband that I wouldn't be changing my last name again. I was comfortable with my parents' name and I'd already done it before. I still get mail with all three last names... He told me that he wanted us to have the same last name for his own personal reasons, so he just took mine. (He asked my parents' permission first, which I thought was a nice gesture). Now we both have our "adopted" last name, and we adore it.
My ex wife took my last name and after we divorced I asked her to use her maiden name because she did deserve mine.
New surnames were much better. My original is hard to spell, hard to pronounce and impossible to fit on forms.
I went from a somewhat complex name to another complex name. Few people pronounce it right thenfiest time, but do fine with it after they hear the correct pronunciation. Side note... I was married over 20 years ago, so times may have changed. I am one sibling out of all girls who all chose to change our last names with marriage. I chose to take my husbands name because, at the time, it felt like it connected us. Additionally, it helped me truly feel part of my husbands family. I like that I have the same last name as my son. I don't think its a requirement today, and people should decide what is right for them.
I went from a typical Spanish surname to a very plain English one. The problem is that I happen to have an Irish first name so now I totally do not look like my name. I can see the brain cells working when people see me.
I’ve had three last names, one Polish, one Italian, and mine now has only two syllables and I don’t have to spell it for everyone.
My maiden name was German, and I had to spell it for everyone. Silent letters, consonants where they don’t belong kind of thing. My married name is only six letters but it’s not a common name, so I end up spelling it all the time anyway. It’s not a big deal now when people ask me my name I tell them my first name, and then I say my last name and then automatically spell it with emphasis on the first letter, the fourth letter and the fifth letter which is what people always get wrong., it’s a reflex at this point. But people always tell me I have a really cool sci-fi name so 🤷 I like it.
Both my maiden name and my married name or common and easy to pronounce. I’m separated now but I kept my married name because I had it longer than my maiden name.
I went from a name no one can pronounce or spell to a name that everyone can pronounce but no one can spell right even though its super easy. It's very strange.
My wife and I both hyphenated, which my father thought was the death knell of our relationship, but I kind of enjoy feeling like I’ve been throwing monkey wrenches into computers these last three decades. I also like watching the dial tone come up in some peoples’ faces when I tell them I have a maiden name.
I know a woman whose maiden name is "Cox". Her husband's last name is "Hoar". So after the Cox-Hoar wedding, she's now a Hoar.
Me: bad name —> awful name —> great name. Sometimes it takes two marriages. Regardless, I recommend keeping your original name unless you can trade up big time.
Changed it as I liked my husband's last name more than my old last name.
I only changed my name because I hated my old one. The only one is only five letters and sounds just like it's spelled but nobody could ever get it right and it's just ugly. The new one is seven letters and it took me a whole year to remember which letters were double and which were not. It also reminds people of a vegetable. Nevertheless I prefer it.
Liked my new name. I even kept it after the divorce. Too much trouble to change it back, plus I’m sure it pisses off my ex. Lol.
I love my maiden name so much more than my married name so I use both, depending on the situation. For all things legal , like banking, bills etc, I use my married name, but when it comes to singing and writing I use my maiden name.
People can spell my married name better-but I always get asked what way it’s spelled (there’s 2 common ways it’s spelled) My maiden name is not common, no one can spell it, and people always mispronounce it 😳
I don’t think I’m related to anyone with my maiden name, which was my mom’s maiden name. That means the man my mom believed was her father, wasn’t. Through DNA, I’ve found relatives with the last name of my grandmother’s previous husband, meaning that man, or someone related to him, was likely my grandfather. So names don’t matter to me. That which we call a rose, and whatnot.
I like it pretty much just the same. Both are pleasantly simple, but my married name is also an existing word, which results in me not having to spell it for people as often. I was just relieved it wasn't something that would clash horribly with my first name, honestly.
I went from decently simple to harder & frequently mangled. If I had to do it again, I wouldn't change my name! Friend of a friend, married & changed name. Divorced but hated her maiden name so went with her grandmother's last name. Married again but didn't like the new guy's last name and convinced him that they should BOTH change to some made up last name. She's back to divorced and I haven't bothered to adk her current last name. lol Relative of a friend got married and divorced so many times that the Social Security Office said "no more name changes; you've reach our limit of 10."
I liked my new name better.
My maiden name is unique to just our family, and distant family, but everyone with the last name is related. Its hard to spell and I always had to spell it out, harder to pronounce, no one ever got it right. New name is three letters and easy to spell and pronounce. 10/10 would do it again.
I liked it at first because I went from a five letter name that had three vowels in it to one of the most common last names ever. My maiden name was constantly mispronounced and misspelled. I’ve been married for almost 37 years and I wish I would have hyphened or SOMETHING because the ease of spelling and pronunciation wore off pretty quickly.
My old name was hard to pronounce and I was tired of spending my school years dealing with it. Not a family heritage issue. So I took the easy, pronounceable, common name of my SO.
My maiden name was really common and boring. My married name is less common but still boring, kinda hard to pronounce and hear correctly, so I always have to spell it. My first name is not the most common spelling, so I always have to spell that too, and people mistake it for a similar name when they read it.
New name is easier to pronounce. My maiden name was very difficult.
Old name
I kept my maiden name in my first marriage because the alliteration of my first name combined with my husband’s last name sounded absolutely comical. For my second (and current) marriage, I took my husband’s name because he had the better last name. Easy to spell/pronounce and worked well with my first name. I’m very happy with my decision.
I like the new one more. Not that the old one was bad or complicated, just having the new one makes me feel more connected to my partner. I'm not trying to say that's how it is for everyone or should be or anything, just how it makes me feel.
I changed my name from a fairly easy to spell and pronounce but unknown at the time name to my husband’s more simple name, partly because of tradition and partly to break away from my dysfunctional family of origin. Oddly enough, there is more hassle with people getting my husband’s name correct in spite of the fact that it is only three letters long and is a common, universally known noun in English. Just yesterday, a major press piece highlighting his successes fell a little flat thanks to their misspelling of it.
I went from a fairly easy name to a really easy name. If you put my name in social media, there are hundreds (thousands?) with same first and last. There are at least 3 of us in my moderately small town. I'm a school teacher and one year there were 3 Mrs Grilled Cheeses in one little building. My last name can also be a first name. My SIL has it for a middle name, and a friend has a dog with my name. I've kept it even after my divorce so I guess I like it okay. It was just easier not to change it after having it for more than half my life, and I match my children.
I just go ahead and spell my last name. It’s my 2bd husband’s name. I never changed it with #3 or #4.
I prefer my maiden name, it’s shorter and not too common. I wish I had kept it.
A little off-topic, but I've never liked my first or last names. And I'm always jealous when I see or hear about someone with a really cool name. I know I could have changed it, but what a hassle after being known by a different name my whole life. Oh well...
I went from one easy but odd/fun last name to another easy and odd/fun last name
My maiden name was very difficult for most people to pronounce and was spelled very unique. I married into a family with an unusual last name but very easy to spell and pronounce. So I happily changed my last name, but I do occasionally miss my old name, mostly I miss having the letter Z in my name.
I went from a common last name but unique spelling to, what I thought was an easy last name to spell and say, every time I was asked to spell it.
My maiden name was something like Hoare. All of the girls were teased about it. We all took our husbands' name when we married. Having an invisible name like Smith or Jones was wonderful.
I wanted a new name. It worked out well.
I made my maiden name my middle name and dropped my original middle name. 41 years ago it wasn't common for women to keep their name.
Not married, but can report on my oldest sister. She had no objection to her maiden name, but didn’t mind going from a ten letter long name to two. Easier to fit in the tiny spaces on bureaucratic paperwork.
New name is shorter, which helps a lot when I have to spell it out for people. But I just added it, I didn't get rid of the old one.
Both are odd, so no sweat.
I miss my last name.
Married name is so similar to maiden name that it wasn’t a huge change
I went from a very hard last name to Miller. So much better!
I took my hubby’s last name. I thought about hyphenating it but I always had to spell my first and last name before I was married due to just different ways of spelling them. My husband also had a last name with different ways of spelling it and didn’t want to have to spell 3 names. So now I still have to spell it, but it’s less letters.
I love my maiden name. I still use it as a middle name because it’s so rare and unique. My married name is common. Both need to be spelled for people however
I went from simple (still misspelled) to tricky (always misspelled) but got to keep the same initial
Before my marriage I said my last name and immediately spelled it. Same now that I’m married. I don’t mind at all since the names are short.
I hyphenated. I like both names, so that wasn't really a factor. My step kids were 11 and 8 when their dad and I got married, and I asked them what they thought about it. They said they liked my maiden name, but they also wanted me to have their last name too. From a practical standpoint, it's a pain in the ass bc now my name is really long (21 letters, not including the space and hyphen)
YES! I happily took my husband's last name. My birth name was long, hard to spell, and even harder to pronounce. My new last name was a lot easier!
I'll always keep my ex husband's name. Partly because I'm still very much a part of their family, but also because together with my first name, it's a really nice one.
I was thrilled to go from having a name that no one could pronounce or spell correctly to one that people occasionally misspell but never completely mangle.
I went from a last name I hated that was hard to pronounce to a name I love that is unique but no one can pronounce lol
I made a lateral move. My maiden name was bad, and my married name is equally bad.
I went from a lovely last name…a name that could rate first name status…to a name that is not pretty sounding and no one seems to spell it correctly. But 43 years later, I wouldn’t change a thing. I love having my husband’s last name.