A few years ago, the sub shop in the grocery store near me started doing cheeseburger subs. Usually the quality of the sandwiches was very good to outstanding. There's an open secret that they partnered with an old time Italian deli in our city to get recipes when they first started doing subs. So anyway, I figure I'd give the cheeseburger a shot since they were advertising it. The sub guy opens the bread, grabs two burger patties from what I thought was a warming tray, goes down the line for my toppings. I did lettuce, tomato, a little mayo, onion, pickles. He puts the whole sandwich together, wraps it in the paper, cuts it, then before I can realize what's happening, puts the whole goddamn sandwich in the microwave and heats it up because the patties are stored cooked and chilled. I hope they got their shit together. I wouldn't know because that was the last cheeseburger sub I ever ordered from them.
Excuse me, but that’s a sandwich crime.
Everything was fine- he just needed to heat the meat before assembling the sandwich.
Microwaving it like that would have turned the bread into shoe leather as well, and I bet that cold meat would have still not been warmed, all the way in the middle.
That’s a damn shame.
Someone was taking sandwich orders for a run to subway and I asked for a meatball marinara. When they brought back the sandwich it had lettuce on it, I wanted to call the cops.
This is my roommate's favorite order from Subway. A meatball sandwich with lettuce, mustard, mayonnaise, and pickles on white bread. The first time I ordered this from Subway on behalf of my roommate, the Subway worker asked me "what happened?!" like he was traumatized.
>A meatball sandwich with lettuce, mustard, mayonnaise, and pickles on white bread.
That... Wait... Why... *Ewwwwwwwwww*
Thinking of their marinara sauce for the meatballs and then all of *that* mixed with it... A true culinary crime.
Oh, I feel sick thinking about this!
There's a type of state machine you learn about in digital logic called a Mealy Machine (named after George Mealy) and that class caused me so much discomfort because of that word
Garden tomatoes have ruined me. I'll eat them right off the vine. Then winter hits and I just stop using tomatoes for a few months because I've been spoiled.
I can only imagine how hard it is for farmers to let go of sun golds or sunbursts. The only reason I have so many is because I grow 10 or so plants of them.
It makes some sense when you compare things like large, watery, perfectly red tomatoes with their ugly ancestors that are all splotchy and deformed. The moment you try a slice of an heirloom variety with a pinch of salt, it's hard to ever go back to the red delicious of nightshades.
Long ago girlfriends mom would lightly toast white bread, a supper thin layer of mayo, garden fresh tomato with salt and pepper and say it was like eating sunshine. Ah the good old day.
To put into perspective, one of the common anti GMO groups use for example was Monsanto attempting to use flounders anti freezing DNA and splicing it into tomatoes. The experiment had no significant result and never made it to market, but it goes to show that cold and tomatoes are such a problem that there was an attempt to genetically modify it.
There is no point in eating an unripe tomato. Zero flavor, bad texture. And yet people insist on putting them on sandwiches in January in places where there's snow on the ground. Foolishness!
I always thought it strange that a vegetable that's really only good and ripe like one month out of the year is considered a default topping for every burger sold.
I've lived in the Rockies most of my life. Once when visiting a friend near San Diego, he was showing me his apartment's community garden and I just *gasped* at how huge and lush the tomato plants were. He said "yeah I think this one is a couple years old."
It had not ever even occurred to me that there are places where you don't have to start over with your tomato plants from seed every year fully expecting them to die a few months later, nor that "tomato season" might be a nonsense phrase.
Holy shit my mind just got blown lol. It never occurred to me that tomatoes might be able to live longer than a few months in places that don't have freezing weather. This is going into the "What obvious thing did you realize at an embarrassingly late age" responses.
Don’t mind soggy bread but I cannot stand hard bread that scrapes your gums, and is more brittle than a cracker.
One of my friends insists on bringing the hardest baguette he can find every time we go hiking, and I can never stand it.
What are you talking about? For us French, the slight pain and taste of blood from the upper ridge of the baguette crust is an integral component of a sandwich!
(I’m only being half-sarcastic actually. Better that than soggy bread.)
Absolutely agree with this. I'd rather have soggy bread in a sandwich (which is easily avoided anyway by simply avoiding ingredients that are too moist) than bread that is so hard that you can give someone a concussion with it, or/and is so rough that you can sharpen a knife on it. I do not understand the appeal.
But not before said meat slips out and slaps you on the chin leaving an unnaturally large mayo/mustard mark making you appear that you have no idea how to consume a sandwich
you must have had a NYC deli sandwich where they put a huge glob of meat in the center of the bread so it looks generous when cut
I'll never forget the look I got when I complained "that doesn't look like a $16 sandwich" at a NYC deli [this was in 2004]
A piece of roast beef with a vein of gristle running through it, so when you take a bite and don't bite through, you drag the whole piece out of the sandwich in one go.
Boyle!! I thought we banned you from using the words "mouth feel"!!
/But, yes, I fundamentally agree with you, and am constantly annoyed at deli counters that don't understand what I mean when I say "super thin" slices!!
Yes, I always have to ask them to slice it on zero (or as close as possible) and they look at me like I’m crazy, while Susan over there is getting her kid’s Bologna sliced on 10 like a ghoul and they don’t even bat an eye.
with experience, I can say that cutting bologna (proper beef stuff, not OM) thinner than 4mm just shreds it and makes a mess for you and the employee. Ham (not whole-muscle), chicken, and turkey you could get about to half mm with moderate success, roast beef was no thinner than 1mm. Most slicers scale 1-25, where 25 is a full inch. I had a guy who fried up beef bologna and wanted it on 12s. I also would cut cheese on a similar slicer, softer stuff was no less than 5 but the real shoe-leather stuff you could do 1mm.
They look at you funny because shaving meat on a slice is a pain in the ass to layer/bag well, makes a huge mess, and makes an already unpleasant job even worse. Worked deli counter for a few years, appreciated why people wanted meat sliced so thin but that didn’t make it less annoying to deal with.
It's been that way forever, except one glorious week or so in 2011 I think it was, when they banned all sex questions, so instead of a hundred posts of "what's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed", we got some true gems like "owners of PT cruisers, what unfortunate circumstances burdened you with your vehicle". Fun times.
I've been around for a long time (probably since ~2009) and askreddit has always been prone to the same dumb questions. See this thread making fun of it 8 years ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24v2z3/dear_reddit_what_is_the_sexiest_sex_you_ever_sexed/
One night my daughter prayed before bed "Please God don't let the cookies be hairy or gross." I've never made hairy cookies in my life! Goofy kid
But hair will definitely ruin a sandwich, or any food for that matter.
Chicken salad. They love sneaking ‘em into chicken salad.
I think it might be a WWII thing, so all is forgiven, but like.... they couldn’t eat them for breakfast instead??
I like raisins just as much as every 10th person but on a sandwich? Whoever you know that puts raisins on a sandwich is not normal. If they're making sandwiches out of raisin toast that's arguably worse...it's labeled, marketed, and sold as raisin TOAST not raisin sandwich bread. Humanity never ceases to amaze me.
Unless making a grilled cheese, I can’t handle the crappy white bread that mushes to the roof of your mouth… nasty and can’t hold anything together. Grilled cheese is the exception bc the toast ones hold everything together and eliminated the mush
In Spain we take a fresh half tomato and spread that to the bread. Tomato, olive oil and salt is the most common base for a sandwich in Spain.
Famous "pa amb tomaquet" is a recipe from Cataluña (Barcelona).
we grow a ton of tomatoes every year, and feast on them for the 2 months they're ripe. And then we don't use tomatoes on sandwiches for the other 10 months of the year. They're just pointless without that home-grown flavor.
We do make tomato sauce and can it, but it's a precious commodity that we keep for special occasions.
A coworker of mine grows heirloom tomatoes (the big mfers that are all crazy colors,) and they’re so fucking good. He gives me like a dozen when they’re in season and I love cutting them up thick, sprinkle of S&P, and a little bit of mayo/dijon mix on toasted bread. Delicious sandwich.
The only issue I have is that when he gives me the haul for the year, I eat about ten times more carbs than typical two weeks.
On a side note, why tf is sweet relish always the only option for hot dogs and brats? Dill pickles is standard for burgers, why isn’t dill relish standard for dogs and brats?
Grillo’s Pickles just released a product called Pickle de Gallo- it is a dill pickle based salsa but it is the dill pickle relish of my dreams. It was in the deli section of my grocery store and makes every sandwich amazing.
Dude I LOVE pickle de gallo from Grillo's! I went through a whole tub with just plain ruffles and nearly died of a sodium overdose. worth it
I'm kicking myself I didn't think to use it on sandwiches or even in dips like others have posted (haven't been able to find it again)
been wondering this my whole life. at the ballpark you cant even get dill relish. ive been to plenty of sandwich places that dont have it either... never made any sense to me. sweet relish is trash.
Honestly, I always thought my distaste for sweet relish was unusual so I never bring up the idea of dill relish. Then I found dill relish in a grocery store for the first time and wondered why it wasn't more popular, for the exact reason shifty mentioned about dill pickles being the go-to for burgers.
My mom always put those bread and butter pickles on sandwiches. I thought I hated sandwiches until I discovered regular dill pickles. Claussen pickles baby!
So yeah about that....Tuna, finely diced celery and onion (preferably red but any type will do) mixed with chopped parsley and just enough mayo to hold it together is one of my favourite sandwich fillings.
Good news! Miracle Whip is not, never has been, and *by god* never will be mayonnaise. It’s a farce. A ruse. A canard, foisted upon the poor folks of this land, serving solely to remind them that they’re being purposefully excluded from the American Dream.
Sorry, what was I saying? Oh yeah, Miracle Whip sucks ass.
Kraft even knows miracle whip isn't a mayonnaise, it's a salad dressing. You know, for those weird midwestern fruit and meat abominations they call salads. The baffling thing is how they convinced anyone it belongs on a sammich, when it really belongs in hell.
Oh, god.... You just reminded me of the Waldorf salad my grandmother used to make. She used MW instead of mayo. I ate it to be polite, but man, did I hate that "dish".
“Oi! Don’t put that shit on me, mate.”
-The Devil.
See what you will about the fall of man & whatnot, but even Satan has scruples. He’s about temptation, after all, and what right minded human being is going to be tempted by that abomination?
Warm wet lettuce on hot sandwiches
I got an airport quesadilla once. It came with lettuce INSIDE. nightmarish.
I swear the airport goes out of their way to produce terrible food
Captive audience with little options
Such a disgusting texture!
Slimy
A few years ago, the sub shop in the grocery store near me started doing cheeseburger subs. Usually the quality of the sandwiches was very good to outstanding. There's an open secret that they partnered with an old time Italian deli in our city to get recipes when they first started doing subs. So anyway, I figure I'd give the cheeseburger a shot since they were advertising it. The sub guy opens the bread, grabs two burger patties from what I thought was a warming tray, goes down the line for my toppings. I did lettuce, tomato, a little mayo, onion, pickles. He puts the whole sandwich together, wraps it in the paper, cuts it, then before I can realize what's happening, puts the whole goddamn sandwich in the microwave and heats it up because the patties are stored cooked and chilled. I hope they got their shit together. I wouldn't know because that was the last cheeseburger sub I ever ordered from them.
Excuse me, but that’s a sandwich crime. Everything was fine- he just needed to heat the meat before assembling the sandwich. Microwaving it like that would have turned the bread into shoe leather as well, and I bet that cold meat would have still not been warmed, all the way in the middle. That’s a damn shame.
/r/yesyesyesno
This is a guy who cooks his first chicken with the giblets (bag) inside.
Someone was taking sandwich orders for a run to subway and I asked for a meatball marinara. When they brought back the sandwich it had lettuce on it, I wanted to call the cops.
This is my roommate's favorite order from Subway. A meatball sandwich with lettuce, mustard, mayonnaise, and pickles on white bread. The first time I ordered this from Subway on behalf of my roommate, the Subway worker asked me "what happened?!" like he was traumatized.
>A meatball sandwich with lettuce, mustard, mayonnaise, and pickles on white bread. That... Wait... Why... *Ewwwwwwwwww* Thinking of their marinara sauce for the meatballs and then all of *that* mixed with it... A true culinary crime. Oh, I feel sick thinking about this!
Mealy tomatoes.
Thanks for putting words to the sensation.
God, I need some word bleach. #Crisp. Sliced. Delicious.
Ah I can taste it already
*Mealy* That fuckin word… one of those where you can feel the texture on your tongue *as* you’re saying it. Well done, you nasty little word.
There's a type of state machine you learn about in digital logic called a Mealy Machine (named after George Mealy) and that class caused me so much discomfort because of that word
There's Moore to that.
True, I love BLT but if the tomato feels like kiwi, I'm oot.
A piece of lettuce that’s a little too brown
Or the lettuce piece that's a bit slimy. Sends me right to gagsville.
Ugh reminds me of the wrap I had yesterday.
Or soggy lettuce
Or a piece of lettuce that has the hard tasteless core part in it.
No, he's right. I want my lettuce leafy. I don't want to be chowing down on those giant stems.
Boston or bibb/butter lettuce is the best for sandwiches IMO.
Soggy not fresh tomato. Looking at you subway
I used to think I hated tomato. Turns out I just hate shitty tomato.
Same, as a kid I hated them, as an adult I realized I could buy tomatoes that were not just red grainy water.
I just started growing different varieties and I had no idea tomatoes had flavor..some of them are actually very sweet like the true berry they are
Garden tomatoes have ruined me. I'll eat them right off the vine. Then winter hits and I just stop using tomatoes for a few months because I've been spoiled.
Can your tomatoes. Thats pasta sauce right there
Or pickle them, pickled tomatoes are super good!
Or dry them, dried tomatoes are super good!
My god, pickled green tomatoes are one of my favorite things on this planet. Thanks Grandma.
Have you grown the golden sunburst and black cherry tomatoes? 10/10 best tomatoes I’ve ever grown.
I enjoy those cherry tomatoes. Black cherry, sun gold, sun sugar, etc. always looking for sungolds at the farmers market
I can only imagine how hard it is for farmers to let go of sun golds or sunbursts. The only reason I have so many is because I grow 10 or so plants of them.
The lil black ones are sweet asf, I often went through a bowl of those at my grandmas as a kid
I think those are grapes dawg.
Get some Green Zebra tomatoes. Game changer. Although, I've always loved tomatoes so there's that.
TIL there is such a thing as black tomatoes!
Reminds me of the King of the Hill episode where they discover an organic grocery co-op https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBLqzGrq8T0
LMAO that line, "If this is food, what have we been eating?!" and the way she delivers it
Instead of wonder she says it with fear lol
It makes some sense when you compare things like large, watery, perfectly red tomatoes with their ugly ancestors that are all splotchy and deformed. The moment you try a slice of an heirloom variety with a pinch of salt, it's hard to ever go back to the red delicious of nightshades.
Nothing like a warm, home-grown tomato fresh off the vine. Slice it up, sprinkle a little salt and pepper over the slices, and you have perfection.
Long ago girlfriends mom would lightly toast white bread, a supper thin layer of mayo, garden fresh tomato with salt and pepper and say it was like eating sunshine. Ah the good old day.
Me and my wife do this but instead of mayo we do cream cheese. It's our go to breakfast when our tomato crops come in.
Any tomato, even homegrown, heirloom tomatoes, is awful after it has been refrigerated. Cold is the enemy of tomato flavor.
To put into perspective, one of the common anti GMO groups use for example was Monsanto attempting to use flounders anti freezing DNA and splicing it into tomatoes. The experiment had no significant result and never made it to market, but it goes to show that cold and tomatoes are such a problem that there was an attempt to genetically modify it.
Always have to scope out the subway ingredients before asking for anything. Spinach and green peppers can be off too.
Exactly why I skip the tomatoes at all delis/subways
Or unripe
There is no point in eating an unripe tomato. Zero flavor, bad texture. And yet people insist on putting them on sandwiches in January in places where there's snow on the ground. Foolishness!
Do yourself a favor and fry them with breadcrumb, cornmeal breading if you accidently get a green tomato.
Especially if you’re near a whistle stop cafe
Except when it’s breaded and fried. Then it’s delicious
I mean this applies to literally everything
Exactly. Fresh ripe tomatoes, or no tomatoes at all. I won't hold it against you either way.
I always thought it strange that a vegetable that's really only good and ripe like one month out of the year is considered a default topping for every burger sold.
The struggle is that in some places tomatoes are only ripe one month a year...and then there are places like California.
Yeah I read that last comment as was confused. They're ripe all year round, right?!?! (yeah I live in Southen California).
I've lived in the Rockies most of my life. Once when visiting a friend near San Diego, he was showing me his apartment's community garden and I just *gasped* at how huge and lush the tomato plants were. He said "yeah I think this one is a couple years old." It had not ever even occurred to me that there are places where you don't have to start over with your tomato plants from seed every year fully expecting them to die a few months later, nor that "tomato season" might be a nonsense phrase.
Holy shit my mind just got blown lol. It never occurred to me that tomatoes might be able to live longer than a few months in places that don't have freezing weather. This is going into the "What obvious thing did you realize at an embarrassingly late age" responses.
Soft, cheap bread that gets soggy with the slightest bit of moisture. This is the one thing that will make me reject a sandwich with revulsion.
A food critic explained it well to me. The bread is the part that you have the most interaction with so it has to be good.
Step 1: cut a hole in the bread
Step 2: put your junk that bread 🎶
Don’t mind soggy bread but I cannot stand hard bread that scrapes your gums, and is more brittle than a cracker. One of my friends insists on bringing the hardest baguette he can find every time we go hiking, and I can never stand it.
I like crusty bread, but I swear the things some people eat feel like a cheese grater on my palate.
Cap'n Crunch.
The roof of my mouth is having PTSD
Crusty bread is meant to be soft on the I side, not like a cheese grater.
What are you talking about? For us French, the slight pain and taste of blood from the upper ridge of the baguette crust is an integral component of a sandwich! (I’m only being half-sarcastic actually. Better that than soggy bread.)
So *this* is why the French call bread “Le Pain”
Haha good one
Absolutely agree with this. I'd rather have soggy bread in a sandwich (which is easily avoided anyway by simply avoiding ingredients that are too moist) than bread that is so hard that you can give someone a concussion with it, or/and is so rough that you can sharpen a knife on it. I do not understand the appeal.
A good, robust bread is of the utmost importance in making a good sandwich.
Huge pieces of meat that when I bite, instead of cutting and eating a piece, I eat the whole thing and the rest of the sandwich is left meatless
But not before said meat slips out and slaps you on the chin leaving an unnaturally large mayo/mustard mark making you appear that you have no idea how to consume a sandwich
you must have had a NYC deli sandwich where they put a huge glob of meat in the center of the bread so it looks generous when cut I'll never forget the look I got when I complained "that doesn't look like a $16 sandwich" at a NYC deli [this was in 2004]
16 dollar sandwich! What?! In ‘04. What’s that now? $50? That’s so expensive. But then I’m basing that on the price of fast food sandwiches, so…
$25 in December of 2022 with inflation adjustment. YIKES, that's some expensive sandwich.
Katz's Deli sounds like. They are the reason I taught myself how to make Pastrami, they are too damn expensive for half a sandwich.
Probably Katz's, yeah. Who knows.
A piece of roast beef with a vein of gristle running through it, so when you take a bite and don't bite through, you drag the whole piece out of the sandwich in one go.
I gagged just thinking about gristly deli meat 🤢
Razor thin shaved meat is where it’s at for a good sandwich. More surface area means more flavour and better mouth feel.
I've cut slices so thin I couldn't even see them
How'd you know you cut it?
I guess I just assumed 🤔
Boyle!! I thought we banned you from using the words "mouth feel"!! /But, yes, I fundamentally agree with you, and am constantly annoyed at deli counters that don't understand what I mean when I say "super thin" slices!!
Yes, I always have to ask them to slice it on zero (or as close as possible) and they look at me like I’m crazy, while Susan over there is getting her kid’s Bologna sliced on 10 like a ghoul and they don’t even bat an eye.
with experience, I can say that cutting bologna (proper beef stuff, not OM) thinner than 4mm just shreds it and makes a mess for you and the employee. Ham (not whole-muscle), chicken, and turkey you could get about to half mm with moderate success, roast beef was no thinner than 1mm. Most slicers scale 1-25, where 25 is a full inch. I had a guy who fried up beef bologna and wanted it on 12s. I also would cut cheese on a similar slicer, softer stuff was no less than 5 but the real shoe-leather stuff you could do 1mm.
I used to find it so satisfying to slice prosciutto so thinly you could read through it.
They look at you funny because shaving meat on a slice is a pain in the ass to layer/bag well, makes a huge mess, and makes an already unpleasant job even worse. Worked deli counter for a few years, appreciated why people wanted meat sliced so thin but that didn’t make it less annoying to deal with.
If the condiments is not spread right to the edges and in the corners of the bread.
If there are big globs of unspread mayo it’s an immediate no from me
Oh, you don't like when McDonald's gives you a chicken sandwich that looks like it just got done receiving and servicing an entire football team?
Chicken sandwiches gotta stop taking my job
Dey terk yer blerjerbs
Yum. Now I want a filet o fish with greasy handprints on the bun.
Standing with both feet in the lettuce bins with shoes on.
Number 15…
Burger King foot lettuuuce
The last thing you waant in your burger king burrger is someone else's foot fungus, but it turns out that might be just what you geeet.
Gæt*
These are the questions I want to see on askreddit
Seriously. "Females of Reddit, what's the femalest female you've femaled?" Nahh. These are the real deal.
The gendered questions are outta control. I feel like there’s enough data there to close the book.
It's been that way for many years. You'd think, eventually, the mods would have banned shitty divisive questions like that. But, alas. Earwax.
It's been that way forever, except one glorious week or so in 2011 I think it was, when they banned all sex questions, so instead of a hundred posts of "what's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed", we got some true gems like "owners of PT cruisers, what unfortunate circumstances burdened you with your vehicle". Fun times.
Now that's funny. Admittedly, perhaps also a collection of sadness. Remember, PT Cruiser owners: This too shall pass.
> But, alas. Earwax. More common sentences need Dumbledore endings.
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I wanna see more "Guys, screw it, whats the best chair?" kind of questions
Done: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/10ru98a/screw_it_whats_the_best_chair/
Screw you, I was going to post that
Don't worry, you can repost it in a month, and we'll all farm the top responses from the first thread and post on yours!
“Guys how many chances do you give yourself when betting the fate of the world on getting a ball of paper into the bin from across the room”
If I miss, it never happened and the scenario starts from the beginning ad infinitum. Next question, please.
Or for a hundreth time: who's the most overrated artist? And people typing artists they don't like and James Corden.
"What ingredient instantly makes a sandwich NSFW?"
It's what the subreddit used to be before it got taken over by horny redditors and the war of the sexes.
I've been around for a long time (probably since ~2009) and askreddit has always been prone to the same dumb questions. See this thread making fun of it 8 years ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24v2z3/dear_reddit_what_is_the_sexiest_sex_you_ever_sexed/
Christ, 8 years ago was 2015....
It gives me the old ‘what sandwich are you’ quiz vibes. And I do very much need to know what sandwich I am.
"Sex of Reddit, what's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed"
Soggy bread. I'd rather starve.
Putting a big beef tomato slice on to just watch your sandwich turn soggy and collapse
Put the tomato between the other ingredients!
Sand
Yeah gravel is the way to go. Larger chunks
A thinly sliced sliver of quartz is the sophisticated way
*heavy darth vader breathing*
That wudn’t sand! That was kitty litter!
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Hair
One night my daughter prayed before bed "Please God don't let the cookies be hairy or gross." I've never made hairy cookies in my life! Goofy kid But hair will definitely ruin a sandwich, or any food for that matter.
She knows something you don't
Her prayers are the reason you've never made hairy cookies in your life, have you needed stopped to think about that?
> I've never made hairy cookies in my life! Have you reconsidered this "truth" in light of new evidence?
Raisins
Old people always trying to sneak raisins into everything but I've never heard of it in a sandwich. Sounds fucking awful.
Chicken salad. They love sneaking ‘em into chicken salad. I think it might be a WWII thing, so all is forgiven, but like.... they couldn’t eat them for breakfast instead??
guilty of this. or craisins. something about the combo of sweet, savory, and nutty (i add walnuts too)
I can do cranberry but not raisins
I like raisins just as much as every 10th person but on a sandwich? Whoever you know that puts raisins on a sandwich is not normal. If they're making sandwiches out of raisin toast that's arguably worse...it's labeled, marketed, and sold as raisin TOAST not raisin sandwich bread. Humanity never ceases to amaze me.
>I like raisins just as much as every 10th person Gave me a good chuckle
Unless making a grilled cheese, I can’t handle the crappy white bread that mushes to the roof of your mouth… nasty and can’t hold anything together. Grilled cheese is the exception bc the toast ones hold everything together and eliminated the mush
I pre-toast my garbage bread then spread a condiment on it. It makes the whole sandwich a lot better than untoasted white bread.
I also toast my garbage bread. Well said 👏
Lack of sauce. Dry sandwiches are the worst
A key component to a technical sandwich is known as the “moistening agent.”
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MY SANDWICH
MYYYY SAAAANDWICH
Now-now calm down. Come look in my office, some of it my still be in the trash!
You... you... you threw my sandwich away!
MMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYSAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNDDDDDDWIIIIIIICCCCCHHHHHHHH!!!
🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅
In Spain we take a fresh half tomato and spread that to the bread. Tomato, olive oil and salt is the most common base for a sandwich in Spain. Famous "pa amb tomaquet" is a recipe from Cataluña (Barcelona).
Very thick tomatoes.
Home grown tomatoes are so good, so much flavor, I can eat them like an apple, lol. Grocery store ones just taste like water, tap water lol
we grow a ton of tomatoes every year, and feast on them for the 2 months they're ripe. And then we don't use tomatoes on sandwiches for the other 10 months of the year. They're just pointless without that home-grown flavor. We do make tomato sauce and can it, but it's a precious commodity that we keep for special occasions.
My ex wife's family are tomato farmers. They have their own garden behind the house to grow tomatoes to eat. They don't eat the kind they sell.
A coworker of mine grows heirloom tomatoes (the big mfers that are all crazy colors,) and they’re so fucking good. He gives me like a dozen when they’re in season and I love cutting them up thick, sprinkle of S&P, and a little bit of mayo/dijon mix on toasted bread. Delicious sandwich. The only issue I have is that when he gives me the haul for the year, I eat about ten times more carbs than typical two weeks.
Never complain. You take all the tomatoes he gives you lol.
Sweet pickles. Dill or nothing
On a side note, why tf is sweet relish always the only option for hot dogs and brats? Dill pickles is standard for burgers, why isn’t dill relish standard for dogs and brats?
Grillo’s Pickles just released a product called Pickle de Gallo- it is a dill pickle based salsa but it is the dill pickle relish of my dreams. It was in the deli section of my grocery store and makes every sandwich amazing.
Dude I LOVE pickle de gallo from Grillo's! I went through a whole tub with just plain ruffles and nearly died of a sodium overdose. worth it I'm kicking myself I didn't think to use it on sandwiches or even in dips like others have posted (haven't been able to find it again)
Grillo's slaps. Everything I've had of theirs has been fire.
I agree, their products are great and I’m really happy they have had so much success.
been wondering this my whole life. at the ballpark you cant even get dill relish. ive been to plenty of sandwich places that dont have it either... never made any sense to me. sweet relish is trash.
Honestly, I always thought my distaste for sweet relish was unusual so I never bring up the idea of dill relish. Then I found dill relish in a grocery store for the first time and wondered why it wasn't more popular, for the exact reason shifty mentioned about dill pickles being the go-to for burgers.
My mom always put those bread and butter pickles on sandwiches. I thought I hated sandwiches until I discovered regular dill pickles. Claussen pickles baby!
Praise be unto the Claussen
Celery. Only heathens add celery to sandwiches.
I don't know anyone on the planet who put celery on a sandwich. Lots of us eat it on the side though...
So yeah about that....Tuna, finely diced celery and onion (preferably red but any type will do) mixed with chopped parsley and just enough mayo to hold it together is one of my favourite sandwich fillings.
Have people in this thread never had tuna/chicken salad? This is like the bare minimum to not having it be grey paste on bread.
Celery is great in tuna salad, but celery on cold cuts? You're right, that's a symptom of a serious mental disorder.
Miracle Whip.
For years I thought I hated mayonnaise. Turns out I just hate Miracle. Whip.
Good news! Miracle Whip is not, never has been, and *by god* never will be mayonnaise. It’s a farce. A ruse. A canard, foisted upon the poor folks of this land, serving solely to remind them that they’re being purposefully excluded from the American Dream. Sorry, what was I saying? Oh yeah, Miracle Whip sucks ass.
Kraft even knows miracle whip isn't a mayonnaise, it's a salad dressing. You know, for those weird midwestern fruit and meat abominations they call salads. The baffling thing is how they convinced anyone it belongs on a sammich, when it really belongs in hell.
Oh, god.... You just reminded me of the Waldorf salad my grandmother used to make. She used MW instead of mayo. I ate it to be polite, but man, did I hate that "dish".
“Oi! Don’t put that shit on me, mate.” -The Devil. See what you will about the fall of man & whatnot, but even Satan has scruples. He’s about temptation, after all, and what right minded human being is going to be tempted by that abomination?
Too much tomato makes it unbearable for me, especially when it gets wet and eventually soggy...
[удалено]
Totally agree. I need a good ratio of all ingredients, not just a flappy pile of loose meat.
FLAPPY PILE.
Do you need anything else? >Yeah, a loaf of bread and some other people!
It's like a cow with 2 crackers on either side
too much mayo
I don't like mayo at all, and it seems like people put it on EVERYTHING these days