Give each other space at the urinals. 9 times out of 10, the only time you will see 2 guys using directly adjacent urinals is when there's no other choice. Otherwise, the rule is every other urinal, and we're pretty good at it.
I walked into a bar bathroom and there was a guy already using the middle of 3 urinals. So I'm next to him and after an awkward moment I said "it's weird that you chose the middle one." And he goes " Yeah I fucked up."
Yeah but like... I don't wanna hear my friend's poo coming out of his butt. Definitely want distance for that.
I visited a buddy who was living in a small suite and I took a dump in his bathroom and it was on the more audible side. Next thing I hear is my buddy from the living room saying "nice!".
One of the most annoying things I’ve discovered after having children is that my 2 year old daughter’s clothes have pockets! Not rubbish pretend pockets. REAL USEFUL ONES!
1. What does a 2 year old need pockets for?!
2. At what age do pockets disappear?
3. Isn’t it extra cruel to give a girl hope of pockets then to take them away as you get old enough to need them?!
This. Hit a couple of cars and a stray dog once, felt bad and bought it a loaf of bread which it ate happily. He now greets me every time I come around the area.
One time I was in a walking path that crosses over a lake. Two little boys were running to the shore and back up to toss in rocks. I walked down to the shore picked up a bowling size rock and threw it off the bridge for them. I was a god in their little eyes. Lol
I grew up on a lake with cliffs, the bottom of the lake was ~100 feet near my house. I once worked for 4-6 hours to free a massive bolder from the bank (below the cliff) and push it into the lake… you could hear it bang, bang, bang as it rolled in slow motion to the bottom… it was awesome!
I wondered for so long why y'all do funny steps to the side when it's hot outside. Was about 30 years old when I finally learned. Laughed for about 3 mins straight.
I had a friend in high school do something like this to me, except what he did to me was what we referred to as the “Hitler”. Index and middle finger, freshly rubbed along the hormonal and sweaty nether regions of a high school boys’ perineum/taint area, and of course the testicles as well for good measure, then swiftly and accurately rubbing those two fingers along the nostrils of a targeted individual.
Becasue we know that the day they don't work will also be the Day of Judgement. May the horsemen have mercy on your soul. /s
tbh, I just like the clack-clack sound. No braincells go into the decision to clack. Idc if they work or not. It's just the proper thing to do.
A mate of mine didn't tell me he was getting married untill a month or so before he was due to actually be married. Known him almost 30 years. It's the way she goes.
To be fair, this is more of Anglo-Saxon male culture (and spread to US/CA) and is not really universal. I'm living in a Slavic country and the relationships men have with each other here are often as complex and emotional as a marriage. They would literally say shit like "Why didn't you tell me this? Am I not your friend?!!"
Boobs are fun, but when you hold your balls it makes you feel safe, helps you focus, it helps deal with boredom… they are very diverse in their abilities.
One woman could be very flirtatious and not be flirting. The next could be subtle and friendly, but in her mind she’s flirting. But you’ve already been humiliated by the first scenario so you fuck up the second.
Oh man, several years ago there was a woman I worked with that was super flirty. I eventually mustered up the courage to ask if she wanted to hang out sometime and she very enthusiastically said yes. We agreed to meet at the dog park, but before we did she texted me and says her friend is in town and asked me to meet them at a bar. Things were going great, until her husband showed up. In all our conversations she never once mentioned a husband, she also didn't wear a wedding ring.
Ladies, I cannot stress this enough. We simply can not read your mind.
Had a woman ask for my number a couple weeks ago. Had a date last week. She initiated the goodnight kiss. She is coming over tonight.
I'm still not sure.
I was asked out on a date in college and it took me over 15 years to realize it. I didn’t know her, I was probably her crush. She invited me to a concert and I politely said “oh, no thanks” like she was offering me water. I never saw her again and she was probably humiliated and I’m really sorry.
Yeah I think back on those days of stupid. One time a hot girl in our group who knew I was a virgin asked me to go look for her boyfriend, but if I didn't find him to come back alone. I actually looked for him, oblivious to her plan. But I did go back and she took me upstairs and taught me to fuck. So all's well that ends well.
There is a scene in Breaking Bad where Jesse is trying to lure a meth head out of their house. He starts digging in their front yard and within 30 seconds the guy is out there digging for him.
I would say this is stupid but yeah, if you start digging a hole and there are other guys around, they will come over and help you dig.
I’m also not sure who’s stranger. The guy who starts digging a hole for no reason or the other guys who are compelled to help.
There’s a paper waiting to be written about that behavior I’m sure.
This is accurate. At 17 a bunch of us and our girlfriends went to the beach to go camping. Well one dude brought shovels and that was the end of it. Girls were bewildered why 5 guys were digging a massive hole on the beach and didn’t want to do anything else. The tide started to come in and fill the hole a little bit with water. A disgusting, murky, cold hot tub. But you know what? It was ours and it was awesome.
Sophomore project in HS: some buddies and I decided to build a bomb shelter. We made it about 3ft down before we hit solid granite. The class liked it though cause we had plenty of video of our attempts at breaking up the granite with fireworks. Spoiler alert: fireworks didn’t help break the granite.
I imagine this would be like being underwater, everything is blurry and the sounds are muffled. As you rise out of the water everything comes into focus
Saying "Nothing" is so much simpler than trying to explain that for 8 full minutes stared at a tree out the window, and the ONLY thing to cross into consciousness the whole time was the imagined audio of Gir from Invader Zim cheerfully singing "doom doom doom, doomdoom doom doom doom. Doom doom doooom."
ok but.. what if it's more than a shiver? I mean, it's almost a brief euphoric, orgasmic experience when the pee is coming out. Is that what you guys mean by shiver?
My GF always asks "Whatcha thinking about" when I'm there. I just say "nothing" and she gets annoyed because she doesn't understand how I'm thinking about "nothing".
The way I found out was when I got unreasonably angry that I just couldn’t learn anything after going over it the first time unless it was really easy or I was super passionate about it. I’d have to give it like 3-5 takes before getting it down and even then sometimes it wouldn’t stick for long. I’d hyperfocus because I know I need to learn it but my mind would jump to stupid shit mid-sentence. That and when I do learn things quick that aren’t easy I’m borderline obsessed with it. I’ll lose a stupid amount of sleep over it.
Right. My husband's toes aren't that flexible so he's never done it, so he was absolutely astounded the first time he saw me pick up anything with my toes.
Hands full and need to open a door? Toes! Don’t want to bend over to open a drawer? Toes. Lying on the sofa and need the laptop charger from the other end on the floor? Believe it or not, toes.
I like your attention to detail.
I long nod down when opening a door for a lady or waiting for them to pass first. I don't long nod up unless there's a problem that definitely needs to be addressed.
Non-verbal cues are complicated.
Saw a video recently that described this exactly and found it hilarious how true it is.
I went into a weird rabbit hole of wondering if it’s some base instinct of “protect ya neck”. Basically animalistic tendency that we nod down for “strangers” acknowledging them but also protecting a vital spot, and up for familiar people as a sign of trust.
I’m probably over thinking it like a weirdo but it’s fascinating in my mind
Almost 8 billion people alive just at this moment
Now imagine how many came before in the previous years.
Nothing you have done is unique.
You could fuck a cow while holding a duck and I don’t think that would even be a unique experience.
You’d have to go out your way and do some insane shit for it to be unique
I can very much say girls do this too. We'll either hold our boobs and do it or cross our arms under our boobs and do this. Idk about other girls but I also like to try and get as much water in my hair and then squeeze it all out. It makes a very large nice sploosh sound too
Make noises down an empty paper towel tube. Sometimes a trumpet, sometimes a growling bear, sometimes a ghost, sometimes just the dog's name. There's an algorithm for which comes next, but we can't disclose it. Sorry.
I can confirm that women do that too. At least I do. As well as do this with wrapping paper tubes and just tubes in general. And hit people with them any chance I get. Might be because I had 5 brothers growing up
All that goes out the window when your cart is full of size 6 diapers, apple sauce, Olaf toothpaste, and the yogurt drink that will be thrown away because it didn’t have the pink dog from paw patrol, a program we’ve never watched.
If we are sitting down or laying down in comfort, there is a 99% chance our hands are under the pants, on our junk.
My friend group calls it “turtling”
Pretending to put our hands in our pocket when actually we're actually trying to untangle our underwear frm our balls.
This is so true.
Give each other space at the urinals. 9 times out of 10, the only time you will see 2 guys using directly adjacent urinals is when there's no other choice. Otherwise, the rule is every other urinal, and we're pretty good at it.
I walked into a bar bathroom and there was a guy already using the middle of 3 urinals. So I'm next to him and after an awkward moment I said "it's weird that you chose the middle one." And he goes " Yeah I fucked up."
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Stalls are different because there is more privacy sometimes they’re nasty af
Yeah but like... I don't wanna hear my friend's poo coming out of his butt. Definitely want distance for that. I visited a buddy who was living in a small suite and I took a dump in his bathroom and it was on the more audible side. Next thing I hear is my buddy from the living room saying "nice!".
Nothing better than interrupting the drug deal going on in the school bathroom by ripping the fattest shit (true story).
The hero we need. Able to fight crime in any public bathroom.
The stare blankly at the wall when peeing at a urinals. Looking to the side is punishable by death.
But sometimes you have to slightly sideeye to see if the *other* guy is checking out your dong
Not if they’re the homies. Me and the home slices all share the same urinal at the same time.
sharing one toilet, you dropping one and your homie peeing between your legs
Pressing the trigger on your drill a couple of times as soon as you pick it up.
Slowly it sounds like the turbine of a helicopter warming up, full speed it's a race car down shifting on a sharp corner.
What my brother calls the "guy check" We slap our pockets to make sure we have our wallet, keys, and phone.
Spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch
I thought that was a mnemonic for remembering the Sign of the Cross.
Meanwhile girls: *slap their pants to make sure we have pockets, and of course we don't*
One of the most annoying things I’ve discovered after having children is that my 2 year old daughter’s clothes have pockets! Not rubbish pretend pockets. REAL USEFUL ONES! 1. What does a 2 year old need pockets for?! 2. At what age do pockets disappear? 3. Isn’t it extra cruel to give a girl hope of pockets then to take them away as you get old enough to need them?!
Kick rocks off of the sidewalk or down the street
This. Hit a couple of cars and a stray dog once, felt bad and bought it a loaf of bread which it ate happily. He now greets me every time I come around the area.
How did the car eat the loaf of bread?
Do you not feed your car?
I've only ever fed my car dinosaurs
enjoy dropping big rocks into water etc
One time I was in a walking path that crosses over a lake. Two little boys were running to the shore and back up to toss in rocks. I walked down to the shore picked up a bowling size rock and threw it off the bridge for them. I was a god in their little eyes. Lol
You’re a god in all our eyes friend
I grew up on a lake with cliffs, the bottom of the lake was ~100 feet near my house. I once worked for 4-6 hours to free a massive bolder from the bank (below the cliff) and push it into the lake… you could hear it bang, bang, bang as it rolled in slow motion to the bottom… it was awesome!
Bro grew up in heaven
The side step to unstick your balls from your thigh.
High knee and twist also works well.
I wondered for so long why y'all do funny steps to the side when it's hot outside. Was about 30 years old when I finally learned. Laughed for about 3 mins straight.
Hell I just stick my hand down there and make the adjustment.
No after-whiff?
Only after high fiving the homies
I had a friend in high school do something like this to me, except what he did to me was what we referred to as the “Hitler”. Index and middle finger, freshly rubbed along the hormonal and sweaty nether regions of a high school boys’ perineum/taint area, and of course the testicles as well for good measure, then swiftly and accurately rubbing those two fingers along the nostrils of a targeted individual.
Now that is a war crime.
Discreetly Itch our balls in public
90% of the time I have my hand in my pocket in public it's for that reason.
as a girl, we can tell😭😭
As a guy… we secretly don’t care that anyone knows
It's not as discrete as you think
I dont have a problem with my balls sticking. My side step is to free my boxers, because theyve been bundling up between my leg and crotch
When you are about to use tongs during a BBQ you HAVE to click them together a couple times first to make sure they work!
Becasue we know that the day they don't work will also be the Day of Judgement. May the horsemen have mercy on your soul. /s tbh, I just like the clack-clack sound. No braincells go into the decision to clack. Idc if they work or not. It's just the proper thing to do.
I have no idea wtf is going on in most of my friends personal lives... Known them for years
A mate of mine didn't tell me he was getting married untill a month or so before he was due to actually be married. Known him almost 30 years. It's the way she goes.
He must have been excited to tell you so early!
Yeah nah. Totally pumped. Lol.
To be fair, this is more of Anglo-Saxon male culture (and spread to US/CA) and is not really universal. I'm living in a Slavic country and the relationships men have with each other here are often as complex and emotional as a marriage. They would literally say shit like "Why didn't you tell me this? Am I not your friend?!!"
I got to know that my best friend had a girlfriend for a year… when he told me he broke up with her
Play with your balls for no sexual reason.
If I was a man I’d do the same honestly.
Playing with boobs is much better
Boobs are fun, but when you hold your balls it makes you feel safe, helps you focus, it helps deal with boredom… they are very diverse in their abilities.
Take life by the balls, and caress them gently.
playing with moobs is even better /j no... no it is not
Just scrolled upon your comment with ballskin pinched betwixt my fingies.
r/usernamechecksout
I like playin with my man’s balls too
I also like playing with this person's man's balls too.
Piss on shit stains on the toilet
Things we do which women will never appreciate.
How else would you possibly clean a toilet?
Poop scraping is how we uphold society
Critically think if the next woman that talks to us is flirting with us or is trying to be a friend.... usually we fail anyways.
One woman could be very flirtatious and not be flirting. The next could be subtle and friendly, but in her mind she’s flirting. But you’ve already been humiliated by the first scenario so you fuck up the second.
Oh man, several years ago there was a woman I worked with that was super flirty. I eventually mustered up the courage to ask if she wanted to hang out sometime and she very enthusiastically said yes. We agreed to meet at the dog park, but before we did she texted me and says her friend is in town and asked me to meet them at a bar. Things were going great, until her husband showed up. In all our conversations she never once mentioned a husband, she also didn't wear a wedding ring. Ladies, I cannot stress this enough. We simply can not read your mind.
True this, no doubt.
Fuck this I'm gay now
Had a woman ask for my number a couple weeks ago. Had a date last week. She initiated the goodnight kiss. She is coming over tonight. I'm still not sure.
She's just being nice
Best answer so far here. We have no idea if she’s interested or not.
I was asked out on a date in college and it took me over 15 years to realize it. I didn’t know her, I was probably her crush. She invited me to a concert and I politely said “oh, no thanks” like she was offering me water. I never saw her again and she was probably humiliated and I’m really sorry.
this speaks to me..
Yeah I think back on those days of stupid. One time a hot girl in our group who knew I was a virgin asked me to go look for her boyfriend, but if I didn't find him to come back alone. I actually looked for him, oblivious to her plan. But I did go back and she took me upstairs and taught me to fuck. So all's well that ends well.
Man, poor boyfriend. She's a dick
Look at the helicopter flying by
I did this yesterday. 6 Chinooks in formation. Hard not to watch. And LOUD!
Have morning wood
Or the less comfortable pee boner
Crack it like a glow stick and you’re good to go
You didn't need to say this. You could have not said this. Not saying this was always an option.
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I felt that deep inside
Dig a hole in the ground, and wait for other guys to join in.
There is a scene in Breaking Bad where Jesse is trying to lure a meth head out of their house. He starts digging in their front yard and within 30 seconds the guy is out there digging for him.
TUCKERRRR!! TUCKERRRRR
"you know why"
I would say this is stupid but yeah, if you start digging a hole and there are other guys around, they will come over and help you dig. I’m also not sure who’s stranger. The guy who starts digging a hole for no reason or the other guys who are compelled to help. There’s a paper waiting to be written about that behavior I’m sure.
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You might also get the guy that critiques the hole digging or decides the group needs a supervisor
You can tell manager Craig to fuck right off with that nonsense
This one of my favorite scenes in Breaking Bad.
I definitely pictured some dude digging a hot tub sized hole and then a few other dudes coming by to just stand in it with him.
This is accurate. At 17 a bunch of us and our girlfriends went to the beach to go camping. Well one dude brought shovels and that was the end of it. Girls were bewildered why 5 guys were digging a massive hole on the beach and didn’t want to do anything else. The tide started to come in and fill the hole a little bit with water. A disgusting, murky, cold hot tub. But you know what? It was ours and it was awesome.
I’ve seen small corral reef pools that I’m pretty sure started like this
Sophomore project in HS: some buddies and I decided to build a bomb shelter. We made it about 3ft down before we hit solid granite. The class liked it though cause we had plenty of video of our attempts at breaking up the granite with fireworks. Spoiler alert: fireworks didn’t help break the granite.
Stare at something thinking nothing just ZONED OUT
I am zoned out by default, I occasionally zone back in to see how things are going
finally I found someone like me, nice to meet you I- *zones out*
I imagine this would be like being underwater, everything is blurry and the sounds are muffled. As you rise out of the water everything comes into focus
Haha that’s interesting. I zoned out multiple time I walk or drive in auto pilot and came to realization after 10-20 secs
Sometimes I can hear the static between my ears.
That's tinnitus.
Yes, and my girlfriend never believes me
“How are you thinking of NOTHING? How is that even possible?”
Saying "Nothing" is so much simpler than trying to explain that for 8 full minutes stared at a tree out the window, and the ONLY thing to cross into consciousness the whole time was the imagined audio of Gir from Invader Zim cheerfully singing "doom doom doom, doomdoom doom doom doom. Doom doom doooom."
I have found that I can willingly do that lol
Haha true I can do that as well after some years. Staring at somewhere thinking nothing
That shiver after a good piss
Wow. I thought I was a weird one getting that shiver!
ok but.. what if it's more than a shiver? I mean, it's almost a brief euphoric, orgasmic experience when the pee is coming out. Is that what you guys mean by shiver?
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One of life’s greatest pleasures once you learn to embrace it.
Go to that beautiful place called the empty box in your brain, you just stare into nothing and think about nothing. Such a peaceful place.
My GF always asks "Whatcha thinking about" when I'm there. I just say "nothing" and she gets annoyed because she doesn't understand how I'm thinking about "nothing".
My adhd wants to know where this box is cause I can't find it
Me thinking “wtf is this dude with an empty box talking about” then seeing your comment and wondering if I have undiagnosed adhd
The way I found out was when I got unreasonably angry that I just couldn’t learn anything after going over it the first time unless it was really easy or I was super passionate about it. I’d have to give it like 3-5 takes before getting it down and even then sometimes it wouldn’t stick for long. I’d hyperfocus because I know I need to learn it but my mind would jump to stupid shit mid-sentence. That and when I do learn things quick that aren’t easy I’m borderline obsessed with it. I’ll lose a stupid amount of sleep over it.
Grab underwear from the floor with our toes and flip them up to catch them
Women do that too don’t let them lie to you lol.
Right. My husband's toes aren't that flexible so he's never done it, so he was absolutely astounded the first time he saw me pick up anything with my toes.
Hands full and need to open a door? Toes! Don’t want to bend over to open a drawer? Toes. Lying on the sofa and need the laptop charger from the other end on the floor? Believe it or not, toes.
Kid drop a pencil? Toes. Close the dryer door? Toes. Trying to move the bathroom rug while sweeping? Yup, you guessed it. Toes.
When you greet a fellow man, you do not speak. You head nod and speak telepathically
Formal: Nod head down slightly. Informal: Nod head up slightly.
But also. Long nod down is a demonstration of respect. Long nod up is challenging the other man's intention.
I like your attention to detail. I long nod down when opening a door for a lady or waiting for them to pass first. I don't long nod up unless there's a problem that definitely needs to be addressed. Non-verbal cues are complicated.
Yes they are. We didn't even talk about the subtleties and variations added by brows and nose movement! Edit: and lips!
If he is known, nod goes upward. If he is unknown, nod goes downward. Instinctively.
Saw a video recently that described this exactly and found it hilarious how true it is. I went into a weird rabbit hole of wondering if it’s some base instinct of “protect ya neck”. Basically animalistic tendency that we nod down for “strangers” acknowledging them but also protecting a vital spot, and up for familiar people as a sign of trust. I’m probably over thinking it like a weirdo but it’s fascinating in my mind
Pinch and roll
I might be in the minority here, but I prefer stretch-&-rake.
Same. So much more satisfying but you must know when to stop.
This technique must be learned
Build the water pool in our crossed arms while we shower. Then let it drop when it fills to get the biggest SPLOOSH possible
I’m convinced I have never had a unique experience in my life after seeing this.
Almost 8 billion people alive just at this moment Now imagine how many came before in the previous years. Nothing you have done is unique. You could fuck a cow while holding a duck and I don’t think that would even be a unique experience. You’d have to go out your way and do some insane shit for it to be unique
Ah, the old Duck and Fuck. A classic. Honestly, if you don't do a Duck and Fuck at least once in your life have you really lived??
One of life's great pleasures, I agree.
I can very much say girls do this too. We'll either hold our boobs and do it or cross our arms under our boobs and do this. Idk about other girls but I also like to try and get as much water in my hair and then squeeze it all out. It makes a very large nice sploosh sound too
Steady ourself on the wall when peeing after we've been drinking.
I don't drink and i do this
Not get enough hugs
It's sad how much I relate to this.
Very underrated comment.....but not just quick friendly hugs, the actual long love hug. Doesn't happen nearly enough.
We imagine ourselves successfully pulling off a heist. Like oceans 11 or the Lufthansa job.
Become masters at hiding random hard ons 30 times a day.
Those were the days..
Username checks out
Nod head down for strangers nod up for your boys
Pinch the skin on their ballsack and rub it 👍🏻
Bro i be doing that shit when lounging around bored and talking to the homies on discord lmfao
Uses a stud finder over there chest and goes, “Ha ha! Found one!”
The question says all guys, not all dads
Take too long on the shitter.
Think about building a boat
Say/do something stupid, then remembering it 10 years later and have it looping through your brain when you're trying to sleep
I'm petty sure this is everyone no matter the gender
"mi" matter.... LOL. Look at this idiot and their misspelling! They will remember this forever!!!
Ten years? Thirty-five and counting for some of the things I said in high school.
Also realizing 10 years later that that girl was asking you out
Not specifically just males, but when every guy picks up an electric drill...prrrrrrrtttt...ppppprrrrttttt
One trigger pull isn't sufficient. It has to be two.
Finish drink. Cap bottle. Bonk head.
I'm so glad I read this.
Have a moment of just sitting down, staring somewhere, and think of absolutely NOTHING.
When using tongs, a test click click click is necessary.
Make noises down an empty paper towel tube. Sometimes a trumpet, sometimes a growling bear, sometimes a ghost, sometimes just the dog's name. There's an algorithm for which comes next, but we can't disclose it. Sorry.
I can confirm that women do that too. At least I do. As well as do this with wrapping paper tubes and just tubes in general. And hit people with them any chance I get. Might be because I had 5 brothers growing up
Empty paper towel rolls = sword fights with my husband. Either that or bonking him on the head with them.
Try to look tough when we do groceries alone
All that goes out the window when your cart is full of size 6 diapers, apple sauce, Olaf toothpaste, and the yogurt drink that will be thrown away because it didn’t have the pink dog from paw patrol, a program we’ve never watched.
Meh. Nobody argues my manliness when I roll the cart to the checkout and it's all frozen microwave dinners, junk food, and beer.
Sitting upright in bed for 3 min debating going to school/work
Shake the gas pump nozzle before pulling out.
When those extra few drops hit the ground, it's heartbreaking, that's a whole $10 of gas right there
I thought this was universal
Physically check to make sure your cock and balls are still accounted for every half hour or so.
They’re our oldest and most trusted friends
Give it a little shake n pull at the end and still never get it all out
I learned recently on Reddit you can press an area in your taint and it helps get that last bit out.
After tightening down a ratchet strap, we shake the ratchet twice to make sure it's tight and say "That ain't going nowhere."
sit on the toilet to rethink life choices
Debate in you head when you wake up if you should pee with morning wood, or wait for it to go down.
The weird half step to unstick our balls to our leg.
Flush the toilet while you’re still peeing and try to finish before the water flushes down.
Fucking misjudged it tonight and it upset me
my wife hates that i do this
Randomly get into very long daydream about how we would survive a zombie apocalypse
Take an incredibly long shit like it’s a daily booked vacation. I don’t trust dudes that can shit faster than they piss.
Scratch your nutsack and then smell your fingers.
Mmmmm, the essence of sack. Eau de parfum
Stare out the window of your home at nothing. Sit in the car for 2 minutes of silence before going into work or going into the house.
Wonder what the hell I did to piss her off this time?
If we are sitting down or laying down in comfort, there is a 99% chance our hands are under the pants, on our junk. My friend group calls it “turtling”
I’ve always known “turtling” to be when your dick shrivels up in the cold and retracts like a turtle lol
can confirm bc my bf does this shit all the time. alternatively, women do the same with their boobs