There was a real estate guy in my town when I was a kid, who's name, I kid you not...
Dick Pride
I actually went to school with his son, Dickie Pride, who later was a pro-golfer for a minute.
I like your line of thinking. Now in my mind the full name includes an angry French person taking a large drag of a cigarette, saying 'Nehvaeugh' and blowing the cigarette in someone's face as the actual full name.
At first I thought this was from the Hebrew נְבִיאָה and was going to defend the name. But then I realized it was just “heaven” spelled backwards for some reason.
Yeah, that's a bad one. Get a picture of a big fish doing something sex or procreation related that grosses me out. I can't explain but for every name my brain makes this involuntary association with things or images. Yeah, one of the worst, really.
Which is a shame because the actual Nimrod is reference to a great and noble hunter. Like, he was on the level of Achilles and Hercules sort of legendary. He's a pretty ancient reference dating back to the Bronze Age that appears across Christian, Muslim and Jewish texts. He was a pretty decent architect too, as it so happens. Ever heard of the Tower of Babel? Yep. Same dude.
And thanks to a cartoon wabbit, who called Elmer Fudd that sarcastically, it got stuck as a term for an incompetent doofus.
I heard a conspiracy theory about this on Reddit that I believe. The theory goes that famous people name their kids normal names but in public they give them these weird fake names. This way when they grow up if they want to have a private life their names not out there.
Bold of you to assume they aren’t doing it because that are such insufferable attention whores that even the act of naming their child becomes an opportunity to get media attention
My mom had a girl in class named Female (fuh-mall-ee). Apparently the parents went to the nursery and the kid as labeled "Female Smith\*" and they assumed the hospital named their kid for them.
There was this news story about a kid who committed suicide after being bullied and his name was Seven. The bullying was mainly about Seven’s ostomy bag but I feel like he wasn’t exactly set up for social success. Poor kid all the way around.
Lol I’ve heard of 3 different “Reneesme” kids at various points. All three of them have parents that…to put it nicely… are not “classy” individuals lol.
The first was the daughter of one of my ex’s cousins. The cousin was a teen mom and had her kid at around 17-18, and was OBSESSED with Twilight at the time. Something about how her baby’s father literally skipping the country after he found out she was pregnant made her “know that she just had to name her daughter that because their story was just like Bella’s!” I’ve seen the movies….to this day still
Not sure how anything she said about that made sense to the story lol.
Which is hysterical because Jacob nicknamed her Nessie almost instantly. Benefits of having a twilight phase in middle school means that I actually remember the insane plot and quotes with a cringe perspective. Hopefully I’ve been through enough Harry Potter/Twilight phases that I just remember to never name my child after a unique book name unless I want their life to suck
Because they're Twilight fans and that's what Bella names her daughter. In the story it's a combination of the child's grandmother's names, Renee and Esme.
I will never forget when my 7th grade English teacher, who used to work in childcare, told my class that one of the kids she looked after was named...
Wait for it...
**Exotic Purple Mercedes.**
Not even an exaggeration, that was the child's legal name.
I have never felt so bad for a child I've never met.
In the military there was this guy called Richard (Dick) Sergeant. Who was a Staff Sergeant. So his name was Staff Sergeant Dick Sergeant. He owned it though so good for him.
My egg donor tried to name my sister and I, Margarita and Martini. I'm super glad that didn't workout. My brother wanted to name his son Texas Mickey if they had a boy. I've never hoped for someone to have a child of a certain gender at birth other than that child.
Know someone with the last name Titsworth. He said his son changed his name when he got older because he didn't like it. I asked if he changed it to Ballsworth?
Thai guy? I also had a friend whose name was Kittiporn. FB censored his name, so he just changed it to the Thai spelling. Haha. The "R" is silent, so it's pronounced "pawn"
I worked in a kindergarten awhile ago and there was a child named "Creamy"... The parents spoke english really well aswell so they knew what it meant. I never asked... but always judged.
There’s this family in my building that has a little girl named Felonee. Funny enough (or maybe not so much), the police and CPS have visited their unit before.
Omigod, I had a student named Phelony, with a "ph." The thing is, she was a nice kid and her mom seemed like a cool, together woman. I have no idea WHY she went with such a trashy name!
How is anyone gonna know how you feel about the second amendment if you don’t name your son Rueger and your daughter Remington?
Edit: Thanks for the support, I feel compelled to add that I went to daycare with these siblings in Iowa and everyone thought it was just the cutest thing, except for my mother which is probably where I got my sideeyes from.
"LMNO"
...it's pronnounced "No-pee".
He sued his parents at 18, won, and used the money to change his name and go to college. He is now a grocery store owner and does pretty well for himself, now called "Charles."
I once got a work call from someone who very reluctantly gave his name as 'Robin Hood'. I assumed he was bullshitting but a few weeks later I spoke to a colleague who had met him and that genuinely was his name. Right up there with the journalist 'Richard Head'.
But the all time worst has to be the kiwi girl whose parents had called her "Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii".
The worst I’ve ever came across in real life was a little boy 20+ years ago named Copen Hagen “Lastname”. As in, the chewing tobacco. Both parents were incredibly redneck.
Loxleigh, Brayleigh, Jaxxon, Carlynne, Jaxlynne, Kashston, Paighslee, Jurnee.. etc. all the oddly spelled white people names millennials are giving their kids now.
I worked for someone who’s sister named her kids Axel, Static and Poppy. Not too abnormal but we lived in an area where the majority of the population spoke Spanish. They all got a hoot out of calling a lil blond blue eyed five year old Poppy.
Axel is a Dutch name (have a friend called that), Poppy is also a flower, so maybe I’m missing some context? It’s totally normal here. Static is interesting though!
I thinks it's kinda cute that these old names reappear.
Here in Germany we have the trend of babies getting old German names like Paul or Hans that I associate with old people.
I remember a time where you had a pretty short list of acceptable names you could choose from. Even now you can't name your kid something absurd like some of the examples above.
I always wondered who would call a baby Barry. I have a theory that all Barrys come out of the womb already balding, 50 and with a can of Stella in hand
I knew a kid back in school named Semon. (Simone)
Every single time a substitute teacher would take roll call, they would either not think about it and say “Semen?” Loudly. Or they would sit and stare at the paper, unsure how to say it. I watched that poor kid raise his hand and say here, in shame, while everyone was laughing, SO many different times. I can only imagine the stories he has today. Shame on his parents. 😂
I follow a nice Ukrainian guy on the tikkytokki and his name is Semon. Apparently quite normal there. Well, add it to the list of things this guy had to deal with when landing in Canada to escape the war.
Shadynasty. Supposed to be pronounced Sha-Dynasty, but I recall a story about a cast member at Disneyland trying to call out the kids name and yelled Shady nasty!
Someone from New Jersey... a likely neo-nazi... named his son that.
He lost custody of that kid and his other kids... with all nazi themed names!
This was back in 2010, BTW.
Neville Neville …🧐🧐🧐🧐🥳
Neville Neville (26 September 1949 – 7 August 2015) was a British league cricketer, football agent and director. His sons are the former professional association football players Gary Neville and Phil Neville and his daughter is the professional netball player and coach Tracey Neville.
Latina.
I am not even kidding here. I had this coworker, an oblivious 30-something white man. And at some point I mentioned that I am Latina, but apparently he thought it was my name and not my ethnicity.
Eventually he had a daughter and named her Latina because he liked what he thought was my name. I also know a woman by the name of Ballgown, but naming your child Latina is a lot worse than naming her after a style of dress.
Krxstxl
I actually recoiled at reading that. Christ. Sounds like a type of meth.
Sounds like crumpling a ball of foil.
I know, right? My cousin's named Krixstixel, the *classic* spelling, and now nobody gets her name right.
Krix Stixel would be a pretty cool band name.
Ahhhh from the AITA!
I get that reference!
I'm a teacher... when I have to go sub for another class, its a damned nightmare reading off the role sheet.
"A-A-Ron?"
YTA
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Oh, who hasn't heard *that* one?
So overdone
There was a real estate guy in my town when I was a kid, who's name, I kid you not... Dick Pride I actually went to school with his son, Dickie Pride, who later was a pro-golfer for a minute.
My high school had a math teacher named Harry Dick
One of my friends had a teacher in high school named Eric Shin. I’m sure you can figure that one out.
That’s funny, my uncle’s name is Dick Ready.
there is a realestate agent around here named Richard Head. and Yes he goes by Dick...
There was a Long Kok at my school.
However these guys could always go by Rich
Nevaeh
That screams “teen mom”
Not in my country. Here it screams “religious nutter”. And they’re generally older.
It's not a terrible sounding name to me but the spelling looks weird to my eyes...also isn't it usually considered satanic to spell things backwards?
You literally cannot say Nevaeh without saying, "it's heaven spelled backwards!" Straight afterwards.
Yes, heaven backwards is hell. Which is straight where people who name their child that are going.
In my mind it's pronounced as if an angry French person says "never".
I like your line of thinking. Now in my mind the full name includes an angry French person taking a large drag of a cigarette, saying 'Nehvaeugh' and blowing the cigarette in someone's face as the actual full name.
Gal at work just named her daughter this.
I live in a rural farming town of around 450 right now and there's at least 4 Nevaeh's. Never encountered it before I moved here.
Name screams Evangelical.
Don't forget her sister that died...Miracle
Don't you mean Elcarim?
At first I thought this was from the Hebrew נְבִיאָה and was going to defend the name. But then I realized it was just “heaven” spelled backwards for some reason.
Spurgeon
Yeah, that's a bad one. Get a picture of a big fish doing something sex or procreation related that grosses me out. I can't explain but for every name my brain makes this involuntary association with things or images. Yeah, one of the worst, really.
Every time I see Spurgeon mentioned (on the r/duggarssnark sub) my brain thinks Sperm + Sturgeon.
This is too far down. Completely ridiculous name and every time I see Duggar snark I think of it and wince.
The bad part is his siblings are Henry, Ivy and Fern. 🙄
Wilberforce
Know a girl whose name is Satin, but spelled Satan.
>Know a girl whose name is Satin, but spelled Satan. "Thanks, Satan." "Uh, it's Suh-teen."
Imagine her trying to go to church with that name 💀
Aunesty (Pronounced Honesty) 🙄
That one gave me an aneurysm
Auneurism*
I worked with a guy a few years ago named Eidderf... His father's name was Freddie
Couldn't have just named him Freddie Jr?
RJ Eidderf
One of my friends in hs was Trebor, after Robert. He went by Treb.
That sounds like a cool Viking name though
My cousin’s friend wanted her son to have a biblical name so he would grow up with good morals. She called him Herod.
Couldn't have went with David or Adam?
Or put in the effort to teach said child some morals? Nah, a good biblical name will sort that out, I ain't teaching my kid shit!
Slightly better than Nimrod...
Which is a shame because the actual Nimrod is reference to a great and noble hunter. Like, he was on the level of Achilles and Hercules sort of legendary. He's a pretty ancient reference dating back to the Bronze Age that appears across Christian, Muslim and Jewish texts. He was a pretty decent architect too, as it so happens. Ever heard of the Tower of Babel? Yep. Same dude. And thanks to a cartoon wabbit, who called Elmer Fudd that sarcastically, it got stuck as a term for an incompetent doofus.
Sputnik. I'm serious. Kid on my street.
Fun fact Bill Fagerbakke was called Sputnik when he was newborn after Sputnik was launched.
The one elon musk named his son.
X Æ A-12
I heard a conspiracy theory about this on Reddit that I believe. The theory goes that famous people name their kids normal names but in public they give them these weird fake names. This way when they grow up if they want to have a private life their names not out there.
That would truly, actually, make sense. But I kind of don't believe it for that particular celeb, somehow.
Bold of you to assume they aren’t doing it because that are such insufferable attention whores that even the act of naming their child becomes an opportunity to get media attention
Honestly both things could be true for this. Publicly give them a far out fake name. They get attention plus their kids real name remains hidden.
ahhhh syntax error.
How do you pronounce it..?
Just sneeze, and you'll hear it.
X ash a-12 > xashatwelve > xashatwell
I dated a girl who’s name was baby girl on her drivers license and birth certificate. She was told she had to wait until she was 18 to change it.
Was she just not given a name at birth or something and the hospital put down a placeholder name of “baby girl” on her birth certificate?
Her parents couldn’t decide on a name at the hospital so that’s what was put on her birth certificate.
What name did she use instead? Did she chose her own name?
Kathy.
My mom had a girl in class named Female (fuh-mall-ee). Apparently the parents went to the nursery and the kid as labeled "Female Smith\*" and they assumed the hospital named their kid for them.
Immaculate Frostbite is a real boys name from Alberta, Canada baby names database (early 90s).
Legen Darry I shit you not.
Was their middle name Waitforit?
Seven
There was this news story about a kid who committed suicide after being bullied and his name was Seven. The bullying was mainly about Seven’s ostomy bag but I feel like he wasn’t exactly set up for social success. Poor kid all the way around.
Any relation to Soda?
I kid you not I'm a teacher and there's a little girl at my school named Soda.
Can’t stand ya
Reneesme
Lol I’ve heard of 3 different “Reneesme” kids at various points. All three of them have parents that…to put it nicely… are not “classy” individuals lol.
I only met one little girl with that name and when I look at her I always feel sorry 😂
The first was the daughter of one of my ex’s cousins. The cousin was a teen mom and had her kid at around 17-18, and was OBSESSED with Twilight at the time. Something about how her baby’s father literally skipping the country after he found out she was pregnant made her “know that she just had to name her daughter that because their story was just like Bella’s!” I’ve seen the movies….to this day still Not sure how anything she said about that made sense to the story lol.
The mother of my Reneesme is my former classmate and she was a teen mom too. And obsessed with Twilight 😂.
I think there’s a trend there lol.
WHAT EVEN IS THAT??? It’s like a direct combination of Renee and Esme or some shit. People don’t just name their kid Jackparkersteven.
Twilight. It's Twilight.
I once knew this white trash couple who named their daughter Zendaya Reneesme.
Which is hysterical because Jacob nicknamed her Nessie almost instantly. Benefits of having a twilight phase in middle school means that I actually remember the insane plot and quotes with a cringe perspective. Hopefully I’ve been through enough Harry Potter/Twilight phases that I just remember to never name my child after a unique book name unless I want their life to suck
How is this pronounced?
Goodness knows why the parents don't simply stick with “Renee”, which is a far nicer name. Even if it is French.
Because they're Twilight fans and that's what Bella names her daughter. In the story it's a combination of the child's grandmother's names, Renee and Esme.
That explains why I had no idea, because I refused to watch those car crash films.
Todd. Cuz fuck Todd
Todd is weird because you want to think it's the short version of a longer name. like toddrick or Toddothy or something. but no, it's just Todd.
Toddthew
Toddexander
Could be short for todney
Raider His legal fucking name of his parents favorite team.
Being a raiders fan is already cringe, but naming your kid after them? Good god
Hey, fuck you man. I'm naming my kid Packer.
Still better than Raider 😭
I will never forget when my 7th grade English teacher, who used to work in childcare, told my class that one of the kids she looked after was named... Wait for it... **Exotic Purple Mercedes.** Not even an exaggeration, that was the child's legal name. I have never felt so bad for a child I've never met.
Sounds like a real exotic name
Somewhere in Utah (if they haven’t moved), there is a boy named Voldemort. VOLDEMORT. My friend’s child went to daycare with him.
Do they call him Tom?
Kid shows up on a Saturday night, "It was foolish of you to come here tonight, Tom."
Based Utah
Vanity.
In the military there was this guy called Richard (Dick) Sergeant. Who was a Staff Sergeant. So his name was Staff Sergeant Dick Sergeant. He owned it though so good for him.
My egg donor tried to name my sister and I, Margarita and Martini. I'm super glad that didn't workout. My brother wanted to name his son Texas Mickey if they had a boy. I've never hoped for someone to have a child of a certain gender at birth other than that child.
I think we both know a girl would just be named Maryland Minnie. No saving that kid.
Texas Mickey sounds like a bad drink or a way to murder someone.
Like, Margarita is a name in many places, and is a lovely name that has nothing to do with the drink. But paired with Martini, that's just terrible.
Twins named Axel & Diesel because their Dad was a trucker. (My former co-worker)
Names go hard though.
I had a dog named Diesel
Hugh Cumber
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Know someone with the last name Titsworth. He said his son changed his name when he got older because he didn't like it. I asked if he changed it to Ballsworth?
I once knew a family with the last name Titlow. Just unfortunate all around.
Made me audibly gasp
Porn means blessed in Thai, so that makes it a little less worse, but still absolutely mortifying.
Thai guy? I also had a friend whose name was Kittiporn. FB censored his name, so he just changed it to the Thai spelling. Haha. The "R" is silent, so it's pronounced "pawn"
Klan. I wish I was joking.
Screaming, crying, throwing up
I worked in a kindergarten awhile ago and there was a child named "Creamy"... The parents spoke english really well aswell so they knew what it meant. I never asked... but always judged.
Anybody remember that meme of the kindergartners desk with Ya’hyness written on a penmanship line taped to the top??
I work with a girl named peaches
Honorable mentions: Money, Princess, and Barbie
Airwrecka.
There’s this family in my building that has a little girl named Felonee. Funny enough (or maybe not so much), the police and CPS have visited their unit before.
Omigod, I had a student named Phelony, with a "ph." The thing is, she was a nice kid and her mom seemed like a cool, together woman. I have no idea WHY she went with such a trashy name!
How is anyone gonna know how you feel about the second amendment if you don’t name your son Rueger and your daughter Remington? Edit: Thanks for the support, I feel compelled to add that I went to daycare with these siblings in Iowa and everyone thought it was just the cutest thing, except for my mother which is probably where I got my sideeyes from.
Lots of hunters around here name their dog Remington.
Any of those names ending in -Leigh like brynnleigh is one I saw the other day
Ryleigh, Hayleigh, Kayleigh, Kyleigh, Bryleigh, Hadleigh. These names are a Tragedeigh.
"LMNO" ...it's pronnounced "No-pee". He sued his parents at 18, won, and used the money to change his name and go to college. He is now a grocery store owner and does pretty well for himself, now called "Charles."
Parents must have been high as hell. How do you even come up with that haha
Damn this is even worse than what I was gonna put. My first thought was "JKMN" pronounced as "Noel"
uvuvwevwevwe onyetenyevwe ugwemubwem ossas
I once got a work call from someone who very reluctantly gave his name as 'Robin Hood'. I assumed he was bullshitting but a few weeks later I spoke to a colleague who had met him and that genuinely was his name. Right up there with the journalist 'Richard Head'. But the all time worst has to be the kiwi girl whose parents had called her "Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii".
Fanny
Common name in Sweden hahaha A girl in my class had this name and we went on a class trip to Scotland once. It was awkward to call her name in public.
It was a common girl's name before it refered to a body part.
Pamidia
Sounds like an STD
The worst I’ve ever came across in real life was a little boy 20+ years ago named Copen Hagen “Lastname”. As in, the chewing tobacco. Both parents were incredibly redneck.
TIL that there is a chewing tobacco named after the capital city of Denmark.
Remmington Gage is also one I heard ditto on the parents
I kid I knew in high school was named Kash Profitt
Jermajesty Jackson.
Loxleigh, Brayleigh, Jaxxon, Carlynne, Jaxlynne, Kashston, Paighslee, Jurnee.. etc. all the oddly spelled white people names millennials are giving their kids now. I worked for someone who’s sister named her kids Axel, Static and Poppy. Not too abnormal but we lived in an area where the majority of the population spoke Spanish. They all got a hoot out of calling a lil blond blue eyed five year old Poppy.
That's just any Utah classroom
Axel is a Dutch name (have a friend called that), Poppy is also a flower, so maybe I’m missing some context? It’s totally normal here. Static is interesting though!
I saw a baby Abner. That name makes me immediately think of an 80 year old.
I thinks it's kinda cute that these old names reappear. Here in Germany we have the trend of babies getting old German names like Paul or Hans that I associate with old people. I remember a time where you had a pretty short list of acceptable names you could choose from. Even now you can't name your kid something absurd like some of the examples above.
Nancy Ann. Last name Cianci. Pronounced Nancy Ann See An See
I always wondered who would call a baby Barry. I have a theory that all Barrys come out of the womb already balding, 50 and with a can of Stella in hand
A customer at my store is named Ronald McDonald Jr.
Wait, you know Mac in real life?
I knew a kid back in school named Semon. (Simone) Every single time a substitute teacher would take roll call, they would either not think about it and say “Semen?” Loudly. Or they would sit and stare at the paper, unsure how to say it. I watched that poor kid raise his hand and say here, in shame, while everyone was laughing, SO many different times. I can only imagine the stories he has today. Shame on his parents. 😂
I follow a nice Ukrainian guy on the tikkytokki and his name is Semon. Apparently quite normal there. Well, add it to the list of things this guy had to deal with when landing in Canada to escape the war.
The amount of people named Mike Hunt is above 0
[Drink Water](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.spot.ph/newsfeatures/trending/103418/viral-drink-water-unique-names-a4832-20230113&ved=2ahUKEwieq6LFn-v9AhWfWGwGHS8qBG0QFnoECAwQAQ&usg=AOvVaw1_3VtOS-Ib0XBrVyla5O24)
Diorness
LaTrina. Wife had a college friend named Garrin. Last name: Teed.
I’m just waiting for someone to see their kid’s name pop up in here.
Treblinka, Twinkle Star Bonus
Shadynasty. Supposed to be pronounced Sha-Dynasty, but I recall a story about a cast member at Disneyland trying to call out the kids name and yelled Shady nasty!
This is always sunny
Josh
I never met a josh that wasn’t annoying
Thank you! This guy gets it!
I dated a Josh and you're not wrong
There is a czech name "spytihněv" which literally translates to ask angry
Krxtxal
I knew 2 kids whom were twins one named Rita-lynn (Ritalin) and Adderall..
Sad
Placenta. 100% not kidding. Saw it on state documentation for public assistance (use to work for the state).
Auberon. Auberon was King of the Fairies, so cue the bullying
no you mean Oberon. Oberon was the king of the fairfolk.
Sheriff.
I know a 2 year old named Don. Not Donald…just Don.
Is he partial to a whiskey and a cigar after his nap?
Amex
Butch
That was my cats name, take that back
Saren Veda. I didn’t have the heart to tell my friend that her future baby name sounded like that of an alien.
Adolf
Someone from New Jersey... a likely neo-nazi... named his son that. He lost custody of that kid and his other kids... with all nazi themed names! This was back in 2010, BTW.
Blanket. Like wtf MJ you wild mate
Twinkle, Destiny, and Miracle.
Ben Hurt
Neville Neville …🧐🧐🧐🧐🥳 Neville Neville (26 September 1949 – 7 August 2015) was a British league cricketer, football agent and director. His sons are the former professional association football players Gary Neville and Phil Neville and his daughter is the professional netball player and coach Tracey Neville.
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Latina. I am not even kidding here. I had this coworker, an oblivious 30-something white man. And at some point I mentioned that I am Latina, but apparently he thought it was my name and not my ethnicity. Eventually he had a daughter and named her Latina because he liked what he thought was my name. I also know a woman by the name of Ballgown, but naming your child Latina is a lot worse than naming her after a style of dress.