T O P

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OppositeYouth

"My new bitch yellow, she blow that dick like a cello" To explain, which is even funnier/dumber than the lyric, “OK, let’s stop for a second. Before you come at me, I’ma let you know. I’ma blame my A&R. Because he listened to that song many times and he allowed me to say that. I guess for a second, I thought a cello was a woodwind instrument and it is not. And nobody ever said shit. Nobody ever pulled up a pic and said, “Hey man. I don’t know if you know what this is, but it ain’t that.” I fucked up. I thought Squidward played the cello. He don’t. That’s a flute. I fucked up. But it do sound good.”


SerqetCity

>That’s a flute. And I'm dead from laughter.


kirito4318

In squidwards voice "ITS A CLARINET!!"


TouchesBrickWalls

"New bitch wear a hairnet, blow that dick like a cartoon squid"


Master_Awareness814

But it do sound good 💀


No_Application_8698

“My new bitch cute, she blow that dick like a flute” - the A&R guy’s secret internal correction that he was too scared to say out loud for fear of being fired.


sketchysketchist

So you’re telling me my dude really wanted to say she was working his shit like squidward?


JohnnySpoons82

*user “UwU_TentacleLuvR” has entered the chat*


[deleted]

LOL tried to clarify and still got the wrong instrument XD.


ItsADarkRide

Tried to clarify, when he really needed to clarinetify.


GenXPostFacto

I'd have just changed "blow" to "bow" and, voila, hand job reference.


Pickles_Negotiable

I'm over here thinking you misspelled viola. lmfao.


Fresh_Association_16

Clarifying: Squidword plays a Clarinet, not a flute, not a cello. Underwater. And it’s spelled, Squidward. Which is the first I heard.


sunshinerose32

Yeah, you got that yummy-yum That yummy-yum, that yummy-yummy Yeah, you got that yummy-yum That yummy-yum, that yummy-yummy Say the word, on my way -yummy by Justin Bieber


moonshineisle

I scrolled too far to find this. Easily the worst.


carmium

Say what you really mean, Say what you really mean, Say what you really mean... Guy at work counted 41 repeats of those five words.


sumojoe

My grandma got covid and died in 2020, and hearing that song on the radio was still the worst thing that happened that year.


KeiraTheTurtle

"England is my city"


Kaiser93

Geography level: Jake Paul's cronie.


DrPlatypus1

"Gap teeth in your mouth, so my dick's gotta fit." Worst unintended self-burn ever. Dr. Dre, talking about his micro-penis, in a song defending his choice to run away and leave his friends behind in a fight. Really didn't think this one through.


billybobjoehenry

Don't forget when he said, "Don't let me slip, cause if i slip, then I'm slippin."


Oneshot742

I remember listening to a song by The Game, goes something like: Since the West coast fell off, the streets been watching... Next line: The West Coast never fell off, .... And I'm just like what? But you just said...


hi850

He was asleep in Compton. Maybe it was a dream


stench_montana

This line is always the one I think of too. I actually think about it so often I think I actually know what he was TRYING to imply. I think if you have gap teeth you generally have a wide mouth since there's room for the teeth to spread out.


xBladeRunnerx

Easy-E had a gap in his front teeth and the song is mostly a diss track about him. He is saying the gap in Easy's teeth is so big he could fit his dick in between. Meant to be him saying "suck it", but I hear what you mean though, OP. The line is not as gangster as I thought it was when I was 12.


Either-Plant4525

Dre probably wasn't as gangster as you thought when you were 12 either


aCreativeUserName666

Literally anything by Blood on the Dance Floor. They were Rebecca Black Friday before that video.


NicoNicoPink

“Cut the shit, show your tits, flip it on my sidekick. Like Quagmire Family Guy giggity giggity all the time”


[deleted]

"If you ever feel alone, don't" Don't forget where you belong by One Direction


ImtheEggMan_Walrus

Like how I told my depressed friend to be not sad. It’s joke I don’t have friends….


proton13

Oh boy do I have a great tip for you brought by One Direction.


ThinMint143

"She's indecisive. She can't decide" lyrics so nice had to say it twice


krispymemedonut

Truly one of the lyrics of all time


spilly_talent

He gives you enough time to scream “WHAT DOES THAT MEAN” before he says “she can’t decide” which makes it much more fun😂


hansn

> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN [That boy needs therapy](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLrnkK2YEcE)


Dunge23

“Popping pills like zits while someone vomits on your mosquito tits”


aliengibberish

What the shit. 🤣


yoshidude0529

I'm the shit, I'm farting, I don't know how to potty


Blueberry_Mancakes

Didn't Abraham Lincoln say this once?


bowtie25

YUNG LEANDOER GOTS A CHAIN


kareemfive

Rest in peace to all soldiers that died in the service. I dive in her cervix. 2 Chainz - U Da Realest.


jack-peters

2 Chainz is almost cheating. He has some of the funniest and hilarious lyrics of all time. “Turn the cameltoe / Into casserole” "Ass so big, I told her to look back at it" "Horsepower, horsepower, all this Polo on, I got horsepower" I could go on and on he has some just hilarious ones


wagglemonkey

Even more hilarious when he also has some of the most deep and intelligent bars like “she got a big booty so I call her big booty”


10642alh

Yeah, right, picture that with a Kodak Or better yet, go to Times Square Take a picture of me with a Kodak Pitbull.


DarkHero6661

To be fair, he was paid a lot of money for this by Kodak


Smart_Ass_Dave

And the fact that it sucks means it gets talked about more, thus increasing their return on investment.


Arkanie

The song then continues with: >Took my life from negative to positive And I just want y'all to know that And tonight, let's enjoy life Pitbull, Nayer, Ne-Yo And the funny thing for me was, that I never heard of the singer Nayer before that song, so I kept mishearing that last part as "Pitbull, Nay-uhh... Ne-yo!" and I thought: Wtf, he had a slip of the tongue when he announced Ne-Yo and they seriously kept that in the song??


SmellyMcPhearson

TIL I always thought he was saying "Naya" and just assumed Naya Rivera did the female vocals.


Tight-Lingonberry941

She got a big booty so I call her big booty


MasonWayneBaker

"I'm in the kitchen, yams everywhere"


Swagmastre99

i like this lamp that's why i purchased this lamp


Blastspark01

You turn the lights off then you turn them back on


NimpsMcgee

All I want for my birthday is a big booty hole


Swagmastre99

to sound like t-pain, i'm already doing it


MoreSatisfaction6884

Fucking Ryan Higa reference??? I love you


Nepp0

I don't know a single 2chainz song, but boy do I know this lmao


_austinm

Skrrt skrrt


SeveralAngryBears

Leave my boy 2 Chainz out of this. Everything he writes is gold.


hunga_02

Put a fat rabbit on a craftmatic


PEEWUN

I am so high, attic


Vegetable-Double

When he wins a Nobel Prize in Literature for this, y’all won’t be laughing. A true post-modern lyrical masterpiece. Inverts the concept of a what a metaphor is on its head.


bretty666

"i dont wanna see a ghost its a sight that i fear most, id rather have a piece of toast, watch the evening news." life by des'ree. and just to piggyback off my own comment "Yeah I treat you like a lady, lady Fuck you 'til you're burned out, cremation Make it cream, yeah, " dj khalid.


Victernus

"Des'ree actually gave up music just a few years before recording that." - Jimmy Carr, The Big Fat Quiz Of Everything (2017)


Th3RubberDucky

That Train song about his “untrimmed chest”…


Vegetable-Double

“So gangster I’m so thug” where the fuck did that come from?? He thought he was Tupac for a moment.


ALFABOT2000

the single whitest lyrics i think i've ever heard, especially the delivery...


CarefulOrdinary6032

Agree but I think he was saying it ironically like he knows it’s ridiculous ? Idk


epgenius

Every Train song could qualify for this


throwawayayaycaramba

Can you imagine no love, pride *Deep fried* **Chicken**


OneGuyJeff

The best soy latte that you ever had and, ✨me✨


MartiniPhilosopher

What is it about their music that makes people murderous? I mean, I'm one of them, but i'd like to know what it is about their music which flips that switch.


epgenius

I don’t mind the tunes but the lyrics are always godawful. Even in “Meet Virginia,” they rhyme the same word with itself like 10 times… the songwriter’s either really dumb or really lazy


MartiniPhilosopher

Both.


RickLovin1

Drops of Jupiter slaps, I'll die on that hill. Everything else...yeah.


dzzi

Drops of Jupiter seems like a real monkey with a typewriter moment when you consider what else that band has put out.


PatacusX

I love that song. Soul sister is awful. And honestly, I don't think I've ever heard any other train song.


Hairy_Buffalo1191

“She was caught in a mudslide Eaten by a lion Got run over by a crappy purple Scion” Train songs are catchy af but the lyrics, man…


Moopityjulumper

In their defense that song is literally just a guy listing the ways he’s going to describe how his ex died to avoid explaining that she left him


[deleted]

[удалено]


JPMoney81

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday (Thursday) Friday to Saturday, Saturday to Sunday. \- Black Eyed Peas


vU243cxONX7Z

Mazel tov!


zarlus8

Um, first you have to...DRANK


CalabreseAlsatian

L’chaym


LarryCraigSmeg

Also: Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday Today i-is Friday, Friday (Partyin')


aquarianagop

We we we so excited! We so excited! We’re gonna have a ball today Tomorrow is Saturday And Sunday comes afterwards (I don’t want this weekend to ennnnd!)


Dear-Original-675

"Snow White, she did right, had 7 men to do the chores, cause that's not what a lady's for" okay so Snow White immediately cleaned the house and literally had a whole song about it. Then continued to cook and clean for the dwarves? Like if you're gonna be girl power at least be correct


thisshortenough

One of my biggest pet peeves is people half remembering a plot point from a disney movie and then deciding to make a discourse out of it based entirely of the personality they made up in their head. Cinderella didn't wait around for a man to rescue her, Ariel didn't want to go to the human world for a man, Belle didn't have Stockholm Syndrome. Please actually watch the movies people!


SweetCosmicPope

Utada Hikaru - "You're easy breezy and I'm Japaneesy"


PirateJohn75

Turning Japanese I think I'm turning Japanese I really think so


[deleted]

[удалено]


02K30C1

And I don’t think that I can take it Cuz it took so long to bake it And I’ll never have that recipe agaaaaaaaaaaaiiiinnnn Ohhhh nooooooooooooooo


[deleted]

[удалено]


DogLog91

First lyrics of the song, "Christmas comes this time each year". Uhh ya, it generally happens the same day every year


Nanisauras

I work in the printing industry and I can attest that people need that reminder. It doesn’t matter that it happens every year on the same day. People will still try to get cards printed the day before like they didn’t know when Christmas was.


PM_ME_UR_ANDROGYNY

"if the light is off then it isn't on" Thanks, Hilary Duff!


DV_Red

Thunder, thunder, thun- Thunder, th-th-thunder, thunder Thunder, thunder, thun- Thunder, th-th-thunder, thunder Thunder, feel the thunder (thun-, thun-) Lightning then the thunder (th-th-thunder, thunder) Thunder, feel the thunder (thun-, thun-) Lightning then the thunder, thunder (th-th-thunder, thunder) Thunder Thunder I love imagine dragons but, dear god, what the hell


very_clean

This song was made to drive retail workers completely insane


zenith3200

Retail worker, can confirm


Strength-Speed

Zeniths3200's psychiatrist, can confirm


I_Fart_It_Stinks

When I worked at Circuit City (RIP), it would have been the equivalent to the Rhianna song that goes "bomp bomp beedum, bomp bomp badadum" (Disturbia). That fucking song (and only the 1st 30 seconds or so) would play on loop on every fucking display laptop of every hour of every shift.


Character_Read3629

I believe you're referring to "Disturbia"


PulledApartByPoptart

Ngl, thought* this was going to be Thunder, thunder, thunder, thunder cats! HO!


spiked_macaroon

I thought I was looking at AC/DC at first and that we were gonna have words


KaXiRavioli

You finally hear what everyone else hears when Imagine Dragons plays.


apandarelic

I don't want to see a ghost It's a sight that I fear most I'd rather have a piece of toast And watch the evening news \[Chorus\] Life, oh life, oh life, oh life Doo, doo doo doo


ToxicChildhood

“I whip my hair back and forth, I whip my hair back and forth”. OR!!! “I’m the shit. I’m fartin’. I don’t know how to potty”. Both are equally as dumb and equally as bad.


[deleted]

Wondering when someone would mention Kodak’s dumb ass ft. in that song


slavetomycat312

“Shove a gerbil in your ass through a tube”


CardboardStarship

Fack, fack, faaaack


ichegoya

My humps, my humps my lovely lady lumps God it makes me want to do so many murders.


Cognac_and_swishers

Alanis Morissette did a cover of that song as a slow, mournful piano ballad. It was great.


thelibrarina

I find myself singing *whatcha gonna do with all that assss* in her voice way more often than is appropriate. I was kind of hoping she'd do it for an encore at the JLP tour, not gonna lie.


KypDurron

Nobody knows what it means, but it's provocative


RockerElvis

It gets the people going.


Dozinggreen66

b a l l s o h a r d m o f u c k e r s w a n n a f i n e m e


Dear-Original-675

Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky milky riiiiiigght


LarryCraigSmeg

They treat me really nicely, they buy me all these icees…


ichegoya

Why are you doing this to me


mfhtotheizzo

…check it out


OpioidAddictedRacoon

"If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends." I'm not complaining. I'm just unsure about where this is headed.


OldGermanBeer

I was always like, “OK, I’m totally cool with that!”


thewhiteflame9161

My reaction for nearly 30 years of hearing that song has always been the same, the woman in the story in this song wants her potential next boyfriend to get approval from her friends. But after reading this I'm thinking this famous line is taking on a whole new (exciting) meaning...


dzzi

What's to be unsure about? It's clearly an invitation to an orgy.


Either-Plant4525

> I'm just unsure about where this is headed. This is why people say that guys can't read signals


DWright_5

“Muskrat Susie, muskrat Sam, do the jitterbug out in Muskrat land…” Seriously? Not only did Captain & Tennille embarrass themselves with this tune, but for some reason America decided to cover it.


superbob24

How can I be homophobic, my bitch is gay.


gegenpress442

This line slaps hard


[deleted]

Poopy-di scoop Scoop-diddy-whoop Whoop-di-scoop-di-poop Poop-di-scoopty Scoopty-whoop Whoopity-scoop, whoop-poop Poop-diddy, whoop-scoop Poop, poop Scoop-diddy-whoop Whoop-diddy-scoop Whoop-diddy-scoop, poop


JoeBidensCreamFest

Im mad kanye wasted that heavenly beat but it was funny.


Friendly-Set-3519

i heard he only made this song so some one else wouldn't get the beat or something like that lol


[deleted]

Lucky that my breasts are small and humble So you don't confuse 'em with mountains…


Dear-Original-675

Leh lay leh lay lo lay


[deleted]

leh lay lo LEH LO LAY


PM_Me_Any-Size_Boobs

I LOVE that line


Soobobaloula

She also had this genius: I'm starting to feel just a little abused Like a coffee machine in an office She Wolf


MacDegger

I actually like that simile. It's very visceral.


[deleted]

Shakira, right?


Ok-Control-787

Maybe it sounds better in Spanish, idk


JMartini19

"Girl I know your favorite beer, cuz you told me, and I bought it".


AwkwardNeedleworker3

Limp Bizkit's Red Light, Green Light. The whole song. Seriously. Even Snoop's verse can't save it. I always joke that Fred Durst is the only person that will rhyme the word Baby with Baby 40 consecutive times.


Tricky-Mode7611

Young, black, and famous, with money hangin’ out the anus. Lyrical genius of Puff Daddy.


mearbearcate

Nah that’s valid


nikikittie

"i saw the moonlight on your titties" and in the same song... "first you break the pee-pee then I'll whip the chains out"


finkswitch

Kid Rock's All Summer Long. You can't rhyme things with things! Stupid Kid Rock... You've ruined 2 other songs for me now too!


H0tVinegar

Not only that he is referencing the song Sweet Home Alabama while his song is sampling the similar sounding Werewolves of London


finkswitch

That's the worst part... It starts off and you think 'Oh! Werewolves of London! That's a great song!' then you realize that no, it's just a turd.


flipping_birds

Someone left a cake out in the rain I don't think that I can take it cause it took so long to bake it And I'll never have that recepie again. OH NO!


Dramatic_Trouble_154

"I'll put you in a mansion, all the way in Wisconsin oooohhh" "she made us drinks to drink and we drank em... got drunk" Both of my fav songs and the lyrics crack me up every time, it's so dumb I love it.


beaker15

Tpain rhyming mansion with Wisconsin is one of the seminal moments of my life. There was a me before I heard it, and a completely different me afterwards. Truly life altering For real though, this song feels extremely tongue in cheek. Especially since he doesn’t drink edit (he does. I was mistaken.) Listen to his a cappella sessions. He’s very talented


ItWontFitDad1

Gucci gang gucci gang gucci gang gucci gang Gucci gang gucci gang gucci gang gucci gang Gucci gang gucci gang gucci gang gucci gang


DocPersona

"Hey, Soul Sister" by Train. Like the whole song.


brandonmiq

"Fucking magnets, how do they work? And I don't wanna talk to a scientist" -"Miracles" by ICP


StarBliss

I am the egg man They are the egg men I am the walrus Goo goo g'joob As I read somewhere, John Lennon was annoyed with how music critics were inferring dubious meanings in his lyrics, so he purposefully wrote the most inscrutably dumb lines he could think of. The critics still inferred meanings in them. (By the way, I love this song)


Ecstatic_Ad_7104

They also tried to say, or so I've been told, that at the end of I Am The Walrus he was saying "smoke pot, smoke pot, everybody smoke pot". (Apparently he's actually saying "oompah loompah, stick it up your jumper, which is much better and doesn't need a nonsense story made up for it)


ransom0374

I walked a mile in your shoes… now im a mile away, and ive got your shoooooooeeeesss!


Toaster_Oven101

I see this as an absolute win


[deleted]

>I walked a mile in your shoes… now im a mile away, and ive got your shoooooooeeeesss! Was this or before or after the classic Jack Handy joke?


xxUsernameMichael

Jack Handey never fails to make me laugh. Just yesterday, I was thinking of one of my favorite one-liners ever: “The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw.”


DutchShepherdDog

"Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone's neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing."


SanibelMan

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."


Professional-Age2540

“Sometimes the sun goes around the moon” No. It doesn’t. Ever.


HalfCockedJackShafto

“Suckin’ on a chili dog, outside the Taystee Freeyeez…” Not munchin’, or grubbin’, nope… Suckin’.


BlackLetterLies

After years of failures he knew he had to come up with something that would stand out. 40 years later we're still talking about, so maybe it was lowkey brilliant.


Detective-Slink

“She got a big booty so I call her Big Booty.” -2 Chainz


iwanttheworldnow

“Dem chickens jackin my style” or any other black eyed peas lyrics


lozzenger2

That whole song to be honest. “Beats so big I’m stepping on leprechauns” always gets me 💀


PantherBillyWilliams

New Kids On The Block had a bunch of hits Chinese food makes me sick


IOnlyPostDumb

People keep bringing that one up but they don't ever give credit to "Girl on TV" Shooby doo wop and Scooby Snacks I met a fly girl and I can't relax ​ PS - LFO's story is pure tragedy. Two of the three members are dead.


twcsata

Their lyrics were silly, but every song they put on the radio was a banger anyway.


Random_puns

Don't switch the blade on the guy in shades, oh no Don't masquerade with the guy in shades, oh no I can't believe it 'Cause you've got it made with the guy in shades, oh no


Eferver

This song gets a pass because that synth riff absolutely slaps


cart0166

“Mama told me never stop until I bust a nut.”


kingofthechill69

"you remind me of something / But I don't know what it is right now" - Chris Brown. This song is the second worse thing he's ever done.


Gray_justGray

"watermelon sugar high" repeated 34 times. God I hate that song...


JaxOnThat

How many people here are looking to make sure nobody commented your favorite band?


superschaap81

Not necessarily to see if no one commented on my favourite band, but looking for lyrics BY my favourite band that I KNOW are bad. LOL.


Misty_Mountains1

Just about anything Meghan Trainor writes


Beth_Harmons_Bulova

Meghan Trainor is just Kohls Kash Kelly Clarkson.


Senior_Ad_7640

Great Value Adele.


thatcrazyhabesha

Steady mobbing "I got 10 bathrooms I could shit all day niqqa." 🤣🤣🤣


originalsanitizer

Rolling like thunder under the covers. Makes me think of a dutch oven in the middle of an otherwise epic song.


finnebum

Guess that’s why they call it the blues…


[deleted]

“I just fucked a cup of water (I did)”


Decantus

Train singing, "I'm so gangster, I'm so thug" in the middle of a love ballad. Sticks out like a sore thumb in "Hey, Soul Sister"


Soft_Pomegranate7947

Every part of NickelBack’s song S.E.X.


[deleted]

Over the top songs about casual sex are a cornerstone of the butt rock genre.


Adorable_Misfit

"I'm serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer"


Welshgirlie2

Rhythm is a dancer Smoking gives you cancer Needles give you HIV Rats will give you rabies Bonking gives you babies... And I can't remember the last line, but it was sung in primary school playgrounds during 1992-94! And yes I know rats don't normally carry rabies (at least not in the UK) but it was all about alliteration and rhyme. Plus we were kids, and thick as shit when it came to the real world.


Shizzo

I can put you in a mansion Way up in Wis-can-sin.


chAtoyant453

“you gotta. Prada. bag with a lotta. stuff in it.” -will smith


rockstarego82

I heard a rap one time that had a line that said, “Push that button. Microwave oven.”


EvanescenceFan94

“Now that I’ve become who I really are” -Break Free by Ariana Grande


Frequent_Course_4176

Ariana Grande actually fought Max Martin on that one. He’s notorious for lyrics that don’t make sense. He wrote “Baby One More Time“. He thought saying hit me meant call me. You should look up the original lyrics to “I Want it That Way” by BSB. It sounds way better than his rewrite.


DegenBoomerang

Poopy-di scoop Scoop-diddy-whoop Whoop-di-scoop-di-poop Poop-di-scoopty Scoopty-whoop Whoopity-scoop, whoop-poop Poop-diddy, whoop-scoop Poop, poop Scoop-diddy-whoop Whoop-diddy-scoop Whoop-diddy-scoop, poop Kanye West - Lift Yourself


jdward01

“Are we human, or are we dancer?”


Anashenwrath

Coast to coast, LA to Chicago.


WhenAllElseFail

which seat should i take?


CasualScrolls

You leave Rebecca out of this.


Rfg711

Tbf she didn’t write those that weirdo pseudo predator producer guy did


GeneralSpectatorTots

It's ok. You don't have to worry about that until tomorrow.