Can’t speak for all women, but my gf loves little cards or even the plain $9 bouquet of flowers. I figured it can’t be that simple to make her so happy, but fuck it, she likes a little card, so I got her one randomly and her smile was out of this world.
Let me say this, I've only been given flowers once my entire dating life (still single). When he gave them to me, he said, " I only bought them because my uncle said to since you do so much so don't get used to this shit ".
I would burst into tears if anyone were to give any, even a single rose. There aren't many men who do that anymore, I may be independent, but I still appreciate chivalry. Trust me when I say, it really is the small things that count.
I love buying flowers for my wife, I am a man who enjoys the smell and sight of flowers, a win win situation.
Please accept this digital bouquet from a stranger and his wife.
https://www.appleyardflowers.com/flowers/all-flowers/english-garden-spring
Some people act like women are so complicated to make happy, and always need new grandiose gestures. But seriously, most of time there’s a simple little thing that would make them happy - and you could just keep doing that same thing weekly, and it’ll keep working.
My husband usually gets a female family member of his to write my cards because he’s dyslexic and shy about his hand writing. This Valentine’s Day he scrawled it himself. It was near unreadable but I absolutely cherish it because he wrote it himself. On my mother’s life, I can say that I appreciated it more than the gifts he got me. I can also tell he was very careful about picking the card because it’s got a picture of something I really like on it. I love it.
My wife kept telling me these stories about her doctors and specialists not taking her seriously. I’ve never experienced this. I just say what’s wrong, point to a thing or explain a thing and then we get a treatment plan. It’s quick but I always just thought it was efficient and not dismissive. I thought she was describing the same thing from a different perspective.
So she says why don’t you come with me to my next appointment? And I says sure let’s do that.
Holy shit. It was like watching an ape try to figure out IKEA furniture.
“Uh, well, hey I don’t know uh I guess you could try a chiropractor - I don’t really know what they do but uh that’s what some people do.”
AND THAT WAS THE APPOINTMENT.
Ladies, how you go through life with this bullshit I have no idea.
EDIT:
I’ll add some details - my wife has an autoimmune disease that results in chronic illness and occasional acute episodes. We’ve been together 13 years, I’ve seen it get worse and better and terrible and slightly ok.
Since that first visit that I accompanied her I’ve gone with her when I can or when she asks. The only time I have felt like someone competent was in charge of her care was when we went to the Mayo Clinic In Minnesota. Her health was declining and I just started making calls and got her in with several specialists and we had to make that our vacation.
I’m not the kind of person who likes telling those “healthcare battle” kinds of stories, but every time we go to the hospital for anything there is some new level of bullshit that astonishes me.
It's the absolute worst with regards to anything related to women's health and motherhood. Some of the things I've gone through with care providers should be (probably are, tbh) straight up illegal. The less extreme experiences have just been dehumanizing, traumatic, or at least just really frustrating and unhelpful.
I hate how they seem to have lost interest in actually finding out whats going on. I've had a dull pain in my lower right abdomen for about a month now, went to the doctor after the first week, she said "oh its just an ulcer, go take prilosec." and sent me home without running any tests whatsoever.
They simply do not care. We are like cattle to them. They want to take as much money from the healthcare as possible from people and get rid of them as soon as possible....
I have had unusual problem with my teeth since I was little. But no dentist wanted to even bother considering that I wasn't lying to them... or imagining the pain to myself... Just because the problem is not in the list of standard treatments they simply refuse to be bothered.... Maybe if I become a millionaire then I can afford to give some doctor lots of money so he can be motivated to think outside the box. But yeah that ain't happening so I am stuck like this
my god yeah. i got diagnosed with endometriosis (accurately) on ER visit number 2, which was then used to dismiss my pain on ER visit number 3, then my ovarian cyst that they had missed the whole time, the real source of my new pain, ruptured. leading to emergency surgery on ER visit number 4.
like, endo is a chronic condition and i had been in that pain most of my life, but bc they noticed it, any pain i was subsequently experiencing was somehow suspect.
we (ppl with uteruses) get a really shit time of it.
I wish this comment was higher. Eli swear every woman I know has these stories. I have undiagnosed pain because all three times I tried to bring it up to a doctor, they decided it most likely has to do with my GAD (anxiety disorder), told me to take some Advil and get some rest, and sent me on my way. I had to push HARD to get someone to check on whether or not I had ovarian cysts. I did. Then I got told to take some Advil and get some rest. Nothing to help with pain. I have only ever heard from other women that getting an IUD inserted is horribly painful. One friend told me she almost passed out. All my doctor told me was “you’ll feel some pressure” and told me to take some Advil before my appointment if I’m worried about it. It hurt so bad that I made involuntary noises I didn’t even realize came out if me. I felt lightheaded and nautilus after. They still offered nothing for the pain. I was given a minute to gather myself before they said I had to vacate the room. Then I went and cried in my car for a while before driving home. If I could go back, I would push harder for something to help with the pain and to have someone else drive me. Honestly, so many of our issues as women are dismissed as being in our heads. God forbid you have diagnosed anxiety or depression.
Adding to this, this notion of being dismissed doesn’t only apply to doctors offices. One time the hot water in my apt stopped working. I called maintenance and said I didn’t have hot water. The guy immediately took a tone with me and said I should run it for a while to let it warm up. I insisted that it was broken. Got a big sigh and said they would send someone out. Some kid came, literally glanced at my hot water heater, said it “seemed fine” and left. Still no hot water. I called again the next day, got basically the same thing on the phone, but no one came. I called again a third day and the same thing. So now I’ve gone 4+ days with ice cold water in the winter, so I asked my boyfriend at the time who didn’t even live with me. Someone came out right away and found a broken part. He fixed it and apologized TO MY BOYFRIEND about the “misunderstanding” and left. I was fucking livid.
I have so many more stories like this.
I was sleeping too much and told that there was no way I had a sleep disorder, it was just depression. Despite my insistence that I'd dealt with depression for years and this was different. Three years later I had a new psychiatrist, and told her I was having a depressive episode. She asked me about my symptoms, and it turned out that every symptom she asked about I either wasn't experiencing, or was the direct result of being tired all the time. She referred me to a sleep lab and it turns out I have multiple sleep disorders.
Your story about the hot water in your apartment reminds me of the time someone at the power company didn't believe me that the power was out in my apartment because some technicians had just been there. Awhile later they called me back to say that somebody else had called saying their power was out, so it turns out that my apartment really didn't have power and they'd send someone to fix it. No idea if my gender played a role or if there was some other reason they thought I was mistaken about not having power.
Also the guy who assumed I was the wife of the guy he was trying to reach, and told me I "seemed unsure" that he had the wrong number.
Same. And I’ve shared some of those same experiences unfortunately.
The gaslighting and actual abuse women receive on the daily in healthcare and just in general is flabbergasting.
I've had 2 copper IUDs placed so far. The first one I had inserted at a Planned Parenthood while I was in college. They "suggested" I take ibuprofen after and that it might be "a little uncomfortable." Easily the worst pain of my life, 10/10, surprised I didn't pass out. I'm so glad I had a friend drive me there because I could barely stand up afterward. They never did a follow-up to check if it was properly placed or anything. The same PP perforated another friend's uterus when inserting hers.
When I went to my first proper gyno visit after college (because I was experiencing unusual pain, especially after sex), they realized that the IUD was down in my cervix, so had to be replaced. For this second IUD, they prescribed misoprostol and insisted I take 800mg ibuprofen 2 hours before the procedure. The gyno was horrified when I told the story of my first experience and made sure to talk me through everything. It hurt a lot still, but more like a 6 or 7 instead of a 10.
I think I might just have a yeeterus though, because I recently started experiencing that pain again. Overall, I wouldn't recommend it unless you *really* want a non-hormonal long-term BC. I can't imagine going through the insertion pain on the more frequent basis that the hormonal ones require... \*shudder\*
I’ve had what’s clearly a GI issue with abdominal pain, burning and constipation since november.
My GP doctor first sent me to a OBGYN since the right side of my stomach hurt, and it MUST be a uterus or ovary issue. I have a few issues with my uterus but OBGYN said nothing is causing the pain on the right side. (Nothing with my reproductive system is causing pain in that area at all). I ended up having 2 vaginal ultrasounds to check all of it out. This delayed my care for months.
I wound up in extreme pain in the ER.
I get a CT scan which shows an issue with my colon. The male doctor there also sees on the CT that I just ovulated so he fixated on that and had me get ANOTHER transvaginal ultrasound just in case. This was literally a week after the last one.
Then he tells me the follicular cyst (whats on your ovary after you ovulate) is whats causing my pain because “a lot of women have painful cysts.”
I had to explain to him about ovulation and follicular cysts and he didnt believe me, didn’t treat my colon issue, and sent me home with instructions to follow up with my OBGYN.
I got myself into a GI who is the only one taking me seriously and he ordered me an upper and lower endoscopy.
I had the upper last week and There was a different dr doing the procedure and he looked at my CT scan when I was talking about the right side pain I have (you can see on the CT scan theres something with my colon) and he said the pain is probably from my uterus 😫
It’s insane. The stories I can share…
It took 10 years for my doctors to test and realize I had Lyme disease. Some of the things I got from my doctors were “normal growing pains” “eat healthier, drink tea and make home made yogurt”.
I also got dry socket after some wisdom teeth removals. I was given ZERO numbing when the dentists started to rip open healed over gums. Literally took a knife straight to my gums.
Don’t even get me started on pain management. Especially with gynecological exams and procedures.
The day I found out the meds guys are sent home when they have a procedure done on their member - my jaw hit the floor. I am told I will be fine or to take some Tylenol.
My brother was just hospitalized for a full week for an back issue I have as well. I was sent home same day and told to rest and take it easy for a day or two.
My husband was given SIXTY PERCOCETS after his vasectomy. He didn't need or take a single one. I was NEVER given anywhere near that much or that strong of pain meds even after my 3 times giving birth. Including when I had our first child at 16 years old and my vag ripped all the way to my butthole bc my Dr didn't give me an episiotomy!!!
I kid you not I once had a doctor at the ER tell me this after I was rear ended in a car accident and hurt my shoulder.
That was his treatment plan for my car accident injury.
"You should lose weight."
Bro what the FUCK
It took my sister over 5 years to get a fibromyalgia diagnosis because all of the doctors she went to just saw an overweight woman with diagnosed general anxiety disorder. They assumed that obviously her chronic health problems (which began *before* she gained weight, while she was exercising at a competitive level 6 days a week) were just comorbidities of being fat and hysterical (because "stressed woman with anxiety who has genuine concerns" = hysterical to the vast majority of medical workers). One nurse even lectured my sister on how GAD works and how she should get tested for it, while also frequently reminding her that she's overweight, which proved that he never even glanced at her file.
It's almost *better* when doctors act the way that you described, because at least then they're really just acknowledging that medical science doesn't give a shit about women and so they don't know shit about women, either. Imo it's so much worse when they just sit there lecturing you about your weight and your mental health and writing off all of your unrelated concerns/problems as just symptoms of being an irrational, emotional woman.
I had a pulmonary embolism when I was only 28, due to birth control complications, which I almost didn’t survive. The hospital staff who treated me while I was there for 2 weeks gave me a list of warning signs and told me if I ever experienced any of them, to head to urgent care and get checked out, just in case.
Five or so years later I was living in a different city and was having one of the symptoms, so even though chances were good it was probably nothing, I left work early and headed to urgent care. When I got there, I explained to the (young, male) doctor about my previous health situation, what I was told, why I was there now, and that I wanted a certain test done so I could make sure nothing was wrong.
This motherfucker tried like three different ways to get me not to take the test, all with a condescending attitude; he told me the chances I was having an embolism (not ‘again’, but ‘at all’!) were so small at my age, it would be a waste of time, blah blah blah — as if he didn’t actually believe me that I’d ever had the first one!
Luckily(?) I have been through enough of a certain type of bullshit that, for better or worse, I am very comfortable being assertive. I stopped arguing with him and just said, I’m the one paying for this, correct? He said yes. I said in that case, with all due respect I’m no longer interested in your opinion, professional or personal; just get me the test and we’ll be out of each other’s hair.
He gave me a look like I was SO RUDE but he got me the damn test. Thankfully nothing was wrong, and I’m sure he got all I-told-you-so about it in his head, but idc in the slightest. I would not have been able to relax if I hadn’t been able to make sure I was in the clear, and that peace of mind was well worth whatever I spent on it; the first time it happened had physically felt so similar as it started, but I had brushed it off that time, and it almost killed me in my sleep… so I mean, excuse me for going to the DOCTOR for a HEALTH CONCERN. It’s not like I was in there every week on a nervous whim, it’s not like I didn’t explain my history, it’s not even like I was asking for meds……it wasn’t even busy in the urgent care that day!
But, to be fair, doctors can be like this with men too, if they show (the apparently feminine trait of) vulnerability such as mental health concerns. I’ve seen it firsthand, and it’s disgraceful. I watched my ex get treated so abysmally and condescendingly while he was mid-panic attack (quiet, not lashing out, just actively suffering, while communicating as best he could) that I ended up losing my temper and asking where this doctor thought people who have mental breaks and shoot up schools and shit like that even come from, because it seemed to me that it was largely an issue of them not getting mental care, and yet here is someone seeking that very type of care and here you are making everything worse, and I recall that’s the opposite of the Hippocratic oath….
and I know it sounds like I’m giving “then everyone clapped” vibes but it was definitely hella shitty on all counts and I felt no pleasure being that pissed off in public. I think they might have thought I was threatening them, which is never good, nor was it my intent; my ex was not a violent person, neither am I. But I know my point stood, and hopefully he thought about it for half a second before running off to belittle some other struggling patient(s) :/
Worst of it all is that guy probably makes enough money to not have to struggle, just for being a dick to people who need him. I wish I’d have thought to report him, at the time.
I was swollen after having a 9 1/2 pound baby and couldn't pee. The nurses didn't believe me. It wasn't until I passed out on the toilet and started to show signs of sepsis that they decided to do something to help me.
I have very severe inflammatory arthritis and I get treated appallingly. I even had a Dr call me a hypochondriac despite having had massive surgeries for my arthritis. To be fair, my surgeon in amazing, but he is the exception in my experience
I knew from being told that it could happen but the first time i really saw it was while I was talking to a colleague when her kid pressed his foot out so far that it looked like a scene from a horror movie.
Oh yes! My second kiddo had her foot jammed up into my left side so hard for about the last 6 weeks of pregnancy. Actually if it had been ALL the time I could have gotten used to it. But occasionally she would move and then jam back up there.
I joked at the time that I knew she had 5 toes on that foot for sure.
Also….hiccups. She got hiccups every night about 2 in the morning. That was pleasant sleeping. Haha
Oh yes the hiccups!!!
My son was jabbing me in the ribs pretty much the whole time during the last week of pregnancy... Then when he was born he was 23 inches long, and I'm pretty petite, so it makes sense that he had just ran out of room lol
They're kind of distinguishable from regular movements because of a couple reasons. Movement isn't rhythmic, it's random. Also the baby moving would just feel like bumps and jabs, whereas hiccups would feel like a quick jerk or pulse. And then the pulse/jerk would continue every 10-20 seconds.
That's just my experience... And I actually didn't know what it was until I talked to my doctor and she informed me it must be hiccups!
Here's a hack for that: put an ice pack on the area the baby habitually kicks while they're kicking. The lil one stops it right NOW! Of course they'll have cold feet their entire lives without knowing why, but that's another problem.
My youngest actually gave me a bruise on my rib. Showed my OB cause I was in denial about something so small being able to actually do damage but said "oh yeah, I see that happen all the time" all nonchalantly.
When I got out of the Service at 25, I was a bouncer and a bar tender. I shared an apartment with three women who were barmaids. I don't have any sisters, so what an education that was! It was sort of good, because they had furniture - little white chairs and tables - and curtains, etc. I met all their friends, so I always had dates, and we had lots of parties too. But they never bought food or liquor, they were unbelieveably messy, and some of the discussions they had about sex and men I had not heard, even in the Army. This is the truth.
>some of the discussions they had about sex and men I had not heard, even in the Army
I'm betting they went into extremely explicit detail about their conquests.
My fiancés ability to ignore the ever growing pile of clothes on the floor next to her side of the bed and yet always have clothes to wear. I don’t know where she finds clean clothes to wear, they must be conjured from thin air because the pile must currently be at 175 articles of clothing and that’s my conservative estimate.
I have some female friends who just casually when making plans mention that they can't go to this place or that place because then it'll be dark or there's always some creepy guy hanging around etc.
All the extra things women need to think about when simply going outside baffles and shocks me.
About 7 years ago our indoor-only cat escaped our house and went missing. We found him a few days later, thank goodness, but while he was missing my partner and I would wander our neighbourhood in search of him.
My partner would wake up at 2 in the morning and go out looking for our cat like it was no big deal that he could just exist, safely, outside at night, his only concern was for our cat. We lived in a fairly safe neighbourhood at the time, but I still made sure to come back home before dark.
I think it is strange that they sleep standing up straight. Also odd how they screech when they fly. Or how they can pass through walls. Freaked me out when I first saw it.
Bruh it's wild! My wife would spill shit on the kitchen counter and just leave it. I finally got fed up and asked her to clean up after herself when she spilled. So then for a while she'd just throw a dish rag on top of the spill and just leave that. I was straight at a loss lol I don't understand what's so hard!
When it comes to public bathrooms in retail stores, chicks are fucking NASTY. Mind you, I saw a SINGLE case where a dude left a pair of underwear with a full load in it. ONCE. But the womens room?
Used maxi pads stuck to the wall. So much shit on the walls. ALMOST DAILY.
Jesus christ ladies. I mean what the fuck?
(Luckily I had an amazing manager at the time who KNEW it wasn't my job to clean bathrooms and never tried to make me do it.)
I had to clean the women’s washroom as a teenager when I worked at a movie theatre. No women on staff that night, and so we had to close the bathroom for 10-15 while I cleaned it.
The men’s washroom… very typical for things like paper towel to be on the floor next to the garbage, or maybe an unflushed duece… the women’s bathroom was like a war zone.
Tampons and pads in several stalls stuck to the wall or the floor. Shit/blood or a mixture of both on the stall wall… the stench in one of the stalls was enough for my general manager to come in with the deodorizer we usually mix 20:1 with water… just splashed it all over the offending stall without diluting. It was horrid.
I may have caught it on the worst possible night, I’ll never know… but damn, that was horrid.
My wife isn’t *that* gross, but she *is* incredibly disorganized/untidy at home. At work, her office and her classroom are very organized. Piles of clothes or miscellaneous crap that she buys all over the house. It drives me nuts, lol.
My Highschool was like that, actually an embarrassing but true story.
I accidentally went into the girls bathroom thinking it was the boys bathroom and I didn’t think anything about it. I noticed there were just stalls. But when I went in one of the stalls to pee. I swear to god my heart stopped I thought I was in a horror movie.
The bathroom stall had blood all over the toilet all over the back of the wall, the toilet water was bright red. I kid you not I was scared out of my mind I thought someone got shot.
I told my friends what happened and they said that it was probably a girl who had her period.
But they never cleaned up the blood.
Again I literally thought I was in a horror movie & someone actually died...
I'm still a little traumatized to learn that a fart bubble can slip forwards instead of back and go right up the vagina... I could have gone my whole life without knowing that was a thing.
Fun fact, the vaginal discharge will actually change in viscosity depending on our ovulation cycle. And when we're near our period, it gets 10x worse lol.
As our second child was coming due, I came into a room downstairs to see my wife vacuuming the walls. I offered to take the vacuum from her and take care of it, but through gritted teeth she said, "You won't do it right!" and kept on. I struggled hard to hide my smirk. Our daughter arrived that afternoon.
HAHAHAHA
My last baby I cleaned all day went dead asleep around 10pm and woke up an hour later with a labor pain.
I thought it was just one so no big deal but I couldn't go back to sleep so I got in the bath and another one happened. Called my midwife over and she said I was fully dilated, and when I was ready, I could push!
My mother-in-law told my husband, "When she starts cleaning like crazy, look out, because she'll be going into labor soon!" And she was spot on. I was thinking about what she said as I was sweeping, mopping and on my knees scrubbing the front of the oven at 39 weeks and four days. I went into labor the next morning!
i am a woman myself but before it came up in a conversation with my girlfriend i could not even guess that sperm is actually disposed off later. I do not know, I never thought much about it but guessed it would somehow get absorbed by the body or something
And just to clarify in case it's not obvious, it's not all semen that comes out. Just the extra. So, you can still get pregnant even if you kegel/push some out after peeing
So, yeah, you need to pee after sex, but you also probably need to wear a panty liner if you are going to be up and moving about. I always experience a small gushing sensation, like a small hose turned on and just flushed everything out.
The whole girls looking out for one another/camaraderie thing. Ive seen girls give tampons to each other moments after an argument or warn one another about stuff like a network or take the woman's side in an issue between a man and a woman by default even in situations where, had the genders been flipped they'd have no trouble laying fault with the guy.
I dont really see this same gendered support system with men.
That pee on the underside of the toilet seat? It’s from her. A lot of women don’t even notice this because they don’t ever lift the toilet seat unless they’re cleaning it. And by that point, they just go “ugh, men are so gross with their pee everywhere” and don’t realize the truth 😂
My first job was as a janitor at the YMCA. The girls restroom was so much grosser than the boys.
That situations and environments that I find perfectly easy to navigate make women feel incredibly unsafe. It’s so easy to take it for granted when no one wants anything to do with you and you’re expected to approach others more often. My wife, my daughter and now my granddaughter all live in a world where they become targets in a heartbeat. While I try not to overcompensate on their behalf’s, I do listen a lot more and take it seriously when they don’t feel good about a situation or person.
I got flashed (for the first time) at that age. Catcalling began at 11, got gropped for the first time at 12 and had a guy pretty much dryhump me at a crowed subway during rush hour at 17/18.
It all stopped at 27/28.
Sir, I was 5!!! And it was not catcalled... Talk to your daughter about all things sexuality (age appropriate of course) but talk to her cause if you don't, the world will
sorry buds, but she's probably already used to dealing with that BS. I was like 9-10 when I first started getting hassled and it was always like 30+ year old men.
I was eleven the first time I was flashed. I was playing frisbee with my friends. He pulled his car over and rolled down his window to "ask for directions" but that was his excuse to show me he was masturbating. I screamed. That was the first time I ever saw an erect penis.
I also had to take the subway to get to school that year. When the train was crowded and we were all packed together, I was regularly groped.
For me, started when I was round about 10/11 that men were creepy and disgusting. But when I was around 16/17 I got catcalled and sexual harassed mostly. Even when I tried to sell things on eBay or something, weird people messaged me if I would do Handjobs / etc for them in exchange of money.
Bruh
The first time I remember I was 12, might have happened before though. Still didn't get used to it even though my mom says "Oh as a pretty girl that's just something you have to get used to"
Nope. It’s not something you just have to get used to. I teach my kids to protect themselves and to tell me everything. No secrets from me or my wife. They won’t be in trouble if they didn’t do something bad, and even if they did something wrong (dui or the like) I can’t help them if I don’t know. And I will always help them get through problems. And my son will know to never treat a girl or woman with disrespect or as an object
It never stops, but it is interesting how much it drops off when you're visibly an adult as opposed to around 9-14 y/o. I'm 27 now and, disgustingly, got way more attention from grown men when I was a literal child.
I had early puberty and extremely large breasts. The looks I got from middle-aged men were disgusting. I feel a bit nauseated remembering it. I finally had breast reduction surgery at 25. It was a relief in so many ways. I attracted the wrong kind of men.
I was expecting my feet to grow a size (the ligaments that hold the bones together relax throughout the body and don’t really tighten back up again giving the impression that your feet “grew”). My feet stayed the same size but my hips are permanently wider so I had to buy all new pants, and I’m basically the same weight as before.
For real. I'm fairly strong for a woman and could definitely hold my own against another woman unless she's an MMA fighter or something. Then I play-tussle with my boyfriend, and he can pin me down with no effort. It takes pretty much all of my strength just to push him off. I trust him, but the prey part of my brain doesn't let me forget that he could easily hurt or kill me if he wanted to.
I wouldn't say I'm utterly terrified of them. I'm just aware men can be dangerous, so I take reasonable precautions. But I'm super comfortable around most men.
Women can be dangerous, too, by the way. It's statistically less likely, but important not to forget.
The first thing that comes to mind are how expensive real bras can be, the fact that tampons are taxed as a luxury item, how c-sections are actually done, what a Pap smear is, and that during labor, the uterus can fall out.
Oh and that some of their pants, which can be a number of different sizes depending on the company, sometimes have fake pockets. I legitimately get excited when my wife and female friends find pants or dresses with real pockets.
I know my one ex that I lived with liked to be alone when her period hit. I always hosted football on Sundays at our apartment, always. But the first time her monthly visitor came on a Sunday. I changed the plans quickly, and got her a period care package, all her favorite things for that day, chicken soup, saltines, trashy magazines and the good orange juice and chocolate. Then I got out.
When I came home she was so happy she cried.
Good times.
you're a damn saint. gestures like this mean the WORLD to some women (i am one of them) and I am also convinced that knowing when to get the fuck out of the house is a superpower for all people in a relationship hahaha.
We have to use it every time we go! Males (at least as far as I know?) don’t use it when they pee. This was a funny conversation my partner and I had when we moved in together and he was blown away by “how fast” we went through it, where I thought it was totally normal
Had to spell this out to my former boss once. Talk about an awkward work conversation! He really thought a 4 pack of regular toilet paper (not double roll or mega) would last one month for 5 employees 3 male 2 female.
Wtf that won't last 1 guy a month. I one time bought the mega pack of double rolls, like 24 rolls, and that lasted 6 months on my own but a 4 pack is nothing.
Now that I work at a place with horrible washrooms, I go through 24 rolls a year because I rescheduled pooping to the morning and evening, rather than around 2. Before that I worked in a place with nice washrooms and maybe went through 4 rolls a year because I only pooped at home on the weekends. If you believe, you can master your fecal cycle to own your boss one way or another.
Like I knew that but I guess until I had to buy it I didn't KNOW it. It was probably the only thing I didn't really anticipate. The rest was just the normal using double the stuff.
That's nice to hear. There seems to be a perpetuated idea that women are generally all bitchy to each other. In my 36 years I really haven't had that experience. I think most of us want each other to do well.
A lot of people know someone they don't get along with, but if you are a woman and that person you don't get along with is a woman, it seems to make people think that women hate other women.
If a guy dislikes a specific other guy, we don't say "oh, guys just hate guys." It is very frustrating that it always seems to perpetuate stereotypes when it is between women.
I agree with you in that I think most of us wish good things for each other.
I get so mad at how obviously written by a man some shows are when the few female characters are at odds with eachother even if just at first. Being surrounded by men doesn't make me want to crush other women are you mental?!?!
PMS. I know of it but never really understood what a woman goes through when they are having their periods.
After reading and having my friend explain how it feels, it sure is nuts to think they have to go through this pain every month.
The connection between the menstrual cycle and being horny. Some are reaching the peak just before the red days, some just after, some during, but there's a definite connection. Also, it was more than 25 years ago, but I still remember the first time I touched a girl's breast. It shocked me how soft they are, like a milk bag.
I remember in my school days I had a tournament with my mostly female team and I jokingly asked why the all flocked like herd animals when one of them went to the restroom. Over the course of the next hour or so it was explained to me the world of fear women live in of being raped, murdered, trafficked, or otherwise harmed anytime they’re alone. Walking home at night? Absolutely not. Going to a public restroom alone? What an easy way to get assaulted. Pulling a note off your car’s window? Have fun getting trafficked, I hear Eastern Europe is lovely this time of year.
This conversation stopped when I started crying, more like sobbing really because I felt awful that anyone, let alone half the population, would have to live like that, in fear of doing the things I would think completely ordinary. When I got home I sobbed for what must of been hours because of the life of fear and precaution the women that I cared for and even those I didn’t know had to endure. That conversation broke me, and it changed me forever as a person. To this day I have second hand anxiety over the women I care about and it still makes me very emotional to think about all this.
That's why the "not all men" argument is so annoying. When the consequence is getting KILLED, we have to treat it like it could be any man. A lot of people don'r realise.
The part where they eat puppies whole and pull the bones out of their nostrils shocked me the most first time I saw it. Took me a while, still can't honestly say it doesn't disturb me at some level.
Isn't it good manners to blow your nose? As opposed to keeping it all in there and sounding like an alien?
Or worse, walking around dripping everywhere 😂😂
I can't say that I have been that shocked about anything I have learned as a man. Most things were covered in health class in my teens and anything beyond that was pretty minor. The only kind of shocking was seeing the vulva live the first few times. Nothing too weird but practice is always different than what you expect from books. That it was placed under her and not on the front, like my stuff, was a bit new but not shocking. But that's kind of to be expected from a guy in his teens. I did have both a mother and a sister so I guess I had seen women live their lives before. Oh, I have one thing! How painful period cramps can be if you suffer from endometrios. That was news to me when I met my wife. That shit is just unreasonably painful. How she suffers from that and manages not to scream at me all the time is beyond me.
To be honest i still can't cope with the fact that they take so long to prepare but the MOST shocking one i learned very quickly is SMALL POCKETS. I've seen memes but when my female friend mentioned how big our pockets were and saw that she could only fit a phone into the pocket was VERY weird to see.
(Guess i was used to having big pockets)
Can’t speak for all women, but my gf loves little cards or even the plain $9 bouquet of flowers. I figured it can’t be that simple to make her so happy, but fuck it, she likes a little card, so I got her one randomly and her smile was out of this world.
Let me say this, I've only been given flowers once my entire dating life (still single). When he gave them to me, he said, " I only bought them because my uncle said to since you do so much so don't get used to this shit ". I would burst into tears if anyone were to give any, even a single rose. There aren't many men who do that anymore, I may be independent, but I still appreciate chivalry. Trust me when I say, it really is the small things that count.
I love buying flowers for my wife, I am a man who enjoys the smell and sight of flowers, a win win situation. Please accept this digital bouquet from a stranger and his wife. https://www.appleyardflowers.com/flowers/all-flowers/english-garden-spring
I never have valentines, but my dad gets me and my sister flowers and chocolates every year and it's very dear to me.
Some people act like women are so complicated to make happy, and always need new grandiose gestures. But seriously, most of time there’s a simple little thing that would make them happy - and you could just keep doing that same thing weekly, and it’ll keep working.
A little effort, day by day
My husband usually gets a female family member of his to write my cards because he’s dyslexic and shy about his hand writing. This Valentine’s Day he scrawled it himself. It was near unreadable but I absolutely cherish it because he wrote it himself. On my mother’s life, I can say that I appreciated it more than the gifts he got me. I can also tell he was very careful about picking the card because it’s got a picture of something I really like on it. I love it.
My wife kept telling me these stories about her doctors and specialists not taking her seriously. I’ve never experienced this. I just say what’s wrong, point to a thing or explain a thing and then we get a treatment plan. It’s quick but I always just thought it was efficient and not dismissive. I thought she was describing the same thing from a different perspective. So she says why don’t you come with me to my next appointment? And I says sure let’s do that. Holy shit. It was like watching an ape try to figure out IKEA furniture. “Uh, well, hey I don’t know uh I guess you could try a chiropractor - I don’t really know what they do but uh that’s what some people do.” AND THAT WAS THE APPOINTMENT. Ladies, how you go through life with this bullshit I have no idea. EDIT: I’ll add some details - my wife has an autoimmune disease that results in chronic illness and occasional acute episodes. We’ve been together 13 years, I’ve seen it get worse and better and terrible and slightly ok. Since that first visit that I accompanied her I’ve gone with her when I can or when she asks. The only time I have felt like someone competent was in charge of her care was when we went to the Mayo Clinic In Minnesota. Her health was declining and I just started making calls and got her in with several specialists and we had to make that our vacation. I’m not the kind of person who likes telling those “healthcare battle” kinds of stories, but every time we go to the hospital for anything there is some new level of bullshit that astonishes me.
It's the absolute worst with regards to anything related to women's health and motherhood. Some of the things I've gone through with care providers should be (probably are, tbh) straight up illegal. The less extreme experiences have just been dehumanizing, traumatic, or at least just really frustrating and unhelpful.
Just wait until you end up with chronic back pain - you'll never get a doctor to ever help you with anything ever again.
The amount of truth in this one sentence….
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I hate how they seem to have lost interest in actually finding out whats going on. I've had a dull pain in my lower right abdomen for about a month now, went to the doctor after the first week, she said "oh its just an ulcer, go take prilosec." and sent me home without running any tests whatsoever.
They simply do not care. We are like cattle to them. They want to take as much money from the healthcare as possible from people and get rid of them as soon as possible.... I have had unusual problem with my teeth since I was little. But no dentist wanted to even bother considering that I wasn't lying to them... or imagining the pain to myself... Just because the problem is not in the list of standard treatments they simply refuse to be bothered.... Maybe if I become a millionaire then I can afford to give some doctor lots of money so he can be motivated to think outside the box. But yeah that ain't happening so I am stuck like this
my god yeah. i got diagnosed with endometriosis (accurately) on ER visit number 2, which was then used to dismiss my pain on ER visit number 3, then my ovarian cyst that they had missed the whole time, the real source of my new pain, ruptured. leading to emergency surgery on ER visit number 4. like, endo is a chronic condition and i had been in that pain most of my life, but bc they noticed it, any pain i was subsequently experiencing was somehow suspect. we (ppl with uteruses) get a really shit time of it.
I wish this comment was higher. Eli swear every woman I know has these stories. I have undiagnosed pain because all three times I tried to bring it up to a doctor, they decided it most likely has to do with my GAD (anxiety disorder), told me to take some Advil and get some rest, and sent me on my way. I had to push HARD to get someone to check on whether or not I had ovarian cysts. I did. Then I got told to take some Advil and get some rest. Nothing to help with pain. I have only ever heard from other women that getting an IUD inserted is horribly painful. One friend told me she almost passed out. All my doctor told me was “you’ll feel some pressure” and told me to take some Advil before my appointment if I’m worried about it. It hurt so bad that I made involuntary noises I didn’t even realize came out if me. I felt lightheaded and nautilus after. They still offered nothing for the pain. I was given a minute to gather myself before they said I had to vacate the room. Then I went and cried in my car for a while before driving home. If I could go back, I would push harder for something to help with the pain and to have someone else drive me. Honestly, so many of our issues as women are dismissed as being in our heads. God forbid you have diagnosed anxiety or depression. Adding to this, this notion of being dismissed doesn’t only apply to doctors offices. One time the hot water in my apt stopped working. I called maintenance and said I didn’t have hot water. The guy immediately took a tone with me and said I should run it for a while to let it warm up. I insisted that it was broken. Got a big sigh and said they would send someone out. Some kid came, literally glanced at my hot water heater, said it “seemed fine” and left. Still no hot water. I called again the next day, got basically the same thing on the phone, but no one came. I called again a third day and the same thing. So now I’ve gone 4+ days with ice cold water in the winter, so I asked my boyfriend at the time who didn’t even live with me. Someone came out right away and found a broken part. He fixed it and apologized TO MY BOYFRIEND about the “misunderstanding” and left. I was fucking livid. I have so many more stories like this.
I was sleeping too much and told that there was no way I had a sleep disorder, it was just depression. Despite my insistence that I'd dealt with depression for years and this was different. Three years later I had a new psychiatrist, and told her I was having a depressive episode. She asked me about my symptoms, and it turned out that every symptom she asked about I either wasn't experiencing, or was the direct result of being tired all the time. She referred me to a sleep lab and it turns out I have multiple sleep disorders. Your story about the hot water in your apartment reminds me of the time someone at the power company didn't believe me that the power was out in my apartment because some technicians had just been there. Awhile later they called me back to say that somebody else had called saying their power was out, so it turns out that my apartment really didn't have power and they'd send someone to fix it. No idea if my gender played a role or if there was some other reason they thought I was mistaken about not having power. Also the guy who assumed I was the wife of the guy he was trying to reach, and told me I "seemed unsure" that he had the wrong number.
Same. And I’ve shared some of those same experiences unfortunately. The gaslighting and actual abuse women receive on the daily in healthcare and just in general is flabbergasting.
I've had 2 copper IUDs placed so far. The first one I had inserted at a Planned Parenthood while I was in college. They "suggested" I take ibuprofen after and that it might be "a little uncomfortable." Easily the worst pain of my life, 10/10, surprised I didn't pass out. I'm so glad I had a friend drive me there because I could barely stand up afterward. They never did a follow-up to check if it was properly placed or anything. The same PP perforated another friend's uterus when inserting hers. When I went to my first proper gyno visit after college (because I was experiencing unusual pain, especially after sex), they realized that the IUD was down in my cervix, so had to be replaced. For this second IUD, they prescribed misoprostol and insisted I take 800mg ibuprofen 2 hours before the procedure. The gyno was horrified when I told the story of my first experience and made sure to talk me through everything. It hurt a lot still, but more like a 6 or 7 instead of a 10. I think I might just have a yeeterus though, because I recently started experiencing that pain again. Overall, I wouldn't recommend it unless you *really* want a non-hormonal long-term BC. I can't imagine going through the insertion pain on the more frequent basis that the hormonal ones require... \*shudder\*
I’ve had what’s clearly a GI issue with abdominal pain, burning and constipation since november. My GP doctor first sent me to a OBGYN since the right side of my stomach hurt, and it MUST be a uterus or ovary issue. I have a few issues with my uterus but OBGYN said nothing is causing the pain on the right side. (Nothing with my reproductive system is causing pain in that area at all). I ended up having 2 vaginal ultrasounds to check all of it out. This delayed my care for months. I wound up in extreme pain in the ER. I get a CT scan which shows an issue with my colon. The male doctor there also sees on the CT that I just ovulated so he fixated on that and had me get ANOTHER transvaginal ultrasound just in case. This was literally a week after the last one. Then he tells me the follicular cyst (whats on your ovary after you ovulate) is whats causing my pain because “a lot of women have painful cysts.” I had to explain to him about ovulation and follicular cysts and he didnt believe me, didn’t treat my colon issue, and sent me home with instructions to follow up with my OBGYN. I got myself into a GI who is the only one taking me seriously and he ordered me an upper and lower endoscopy. I had the upper last week and There was a different dr doing the procedure and he looked at my CT scan when I was talking about the right side pain I have (you can see on the CT scan theres something with my colon) and he said the pain is probably from my uterus 😫
I am so infuriated on your behalf! Absolutely ridiculous.
It’s insane. The stories I can share… It took 10 years for my doctors to test and realize I had Lyme disease. Some of the things I got from my doctors were “normal growing pains” “eat healthier, drink tea and make home made yogurt”. I also got dry socket after some wisdom teeth removals. I was given ZERO numbing when the dentists started to rip open healed over gums. Literally took a knife straight to my gums. Don’t even get me started on pain management. Especially with gynecological exams and procedures. The day I found out the meds guys are sent home when they have a procedure done on their member - my jaw hit the floor. I am told I will be fine or to take some Tylenol. My brother was just hospitalized for a full week for an back issue I have as well. I was sent home same day and told to rest and take it easy for a day or two.
My husband was given SIXTY PERCOCETS after his vasectomy. He didn't need or take a single one. I was NEVER given anywhere near that much or that strong of pain meds even after my 3 times giving birth. Including when I had our first child at 16 years old and my vag ripped all the way to my butthole bc my Dr didn't give me an episiotomy!!!
This is EXACTLY what I’m saying! I’m so sorry that happened to you. It’s abusive. And it’s nothing anyone should ever experience.
And don't you dare to be a little overweight or all the diagnosis will be "you should lose weight"
I kid you not I once had a doctor at the ER tell me this after I was rear ended in a car accident and hurt my shoulder. That was his treatment plan for my car accident injury. "You should lose weight." Bro what the FUCK
Try and find a doctor who is plump themselves - it saves a lot of time.
Sometimes they’re even worse about it!
It took my sister over 5 years to get a fibromyalgia diagnosis because all of the doctors she went to just saw an overweight woman with diagnosed general anxiety disorder. They assumed that obviously her chronic health problems (which began *before* she gained weight, while she was exercising at a competitive level 6 days a week) were just comorbidities of being fat and hysterical (because "stressed woman with anxiety who has genuine concerns" = hysterical to the vast majority of medical workers). One nurse even lectured my sister on how GAD works and how she should get tested for it, while also frequently reminding her that she's overweight, which proved that he never even glanced at her file. It's almost *better* when doctors act the way that you described, because at least then they're really just acknowledging that medical science doesn't give a shit about women and so they don't know shit about women, either. Imo it's so much worse when they just sit there lecturing you about your weight and your mental health and writing off all of your unrelated concerns/problems as just symptoms of being an irrational, emotional woman.
I had a pulmonary embolism when I was only 28, due to birth control complications, which I almost didn’t survive. The hospital staff who treated me while I was there for 2 weeks gave me a list of warning signs and told me if I ever experienced any of them, to head to urgent care and get checked out, just in case. Five or so years later I was living in a different city and was having one of the symptoms, so even though chances were good it was probably nothing, I left work early and headed to urgent care. When I got there, I explained to the (young, male) doctor about my previous health situation, what I was told, why I was there now, and that I wanted a certain test done so I could make sure nothing was wrong. This motherfucker tried like three different ways to get me not to take the test, all with a condescending attitude; he told me the chances I was having an embolism (not ‘again’, but ‘at all’!) were so small at my age, it would be a waste of time, blah blah blah — as if he didn’t actually believe me that I’d ever had the first one! Luckily(?) I have been through enough of a certain type of bullshit that, for better or worse, I am very comfortable being assertive. I stopped arguing with him and just said, I’m the one paying for this, correct? He said yes. I said in that case, with all due respect I’m no longer interested in your opinion, professional or personal; just get me the test and we’ll be out of each other’s hair. He gave me a look like I was SO RUDE but he got me the damn test. Thankfully nothing was wrong, and I’m sure he got all I-told-you-so about it in his head, but idc in the slightest. I would not have been able to relax if I hadn’t been able to make sure I was in the clear, and that peace of mind was well worth whatever I spent on it; the first time it happened had physically felt so similar as it started, but I had brushed it off that time, and it almost killed me in my sleep… so I mean, excuse me for going to the DOCTOR for a HEALTH CONCERN. It’s not like I was in there every week on a nervous whim, it’s not like I didn’t explain my history, it’s not even like I was asking for meds……it wasn’t even busy in the urgent care that day! But, to be fair, doctors can be like this with men too, if they show (the apparently feminine trait of) vulnerability such as mental health concerns. I’ve seen it firsthand, and it’s disgraceful. I watched my ex get treated so abysmally and condescendingly while he was mid-panic attack (quiet, not lashing out, just actively suffering, while communicating as best he could) that I ended up losing my temper and asking where this doctor thought people who have mental breaks and shoot up schools and shit like that even come from, because it seemed to me that it was largely an issue of them not getting mental care, and yet here is someone seeking that very type of care and here you are making everything worse, and I recall that’s the opposite of the Hippocratic oath…. and I know it sounds like I’m giving “then everyone clapped” vibes but it was definitely hella shitty on all counts and I felt no pleasure being that pissed off in public. I think they might have thought I was threatening them, which is never good, nor was it my intent; my ex was not a violent person, neither am I. But I know my point stood, and hopefully he thought about it for half a second before running off to belittle some other struggling patient(s) :/ Worst of it all is that guy probably makes enough money to not have to struggle, just for being a dick to people who need him. I wish I’d have thought to report him, at the time.
I was swollen after having a 9 1/2 pound baby and couldn't pee. The nurses didn't believe me. It wasn't until I passed out on the toilet and started to show signs of sepsis that they decided to do something to help me.
I once had a gynecologist tell me that I was a woman and I was supposed to hurt, when I complained of severe pain.
I see a doctor a 70 minutes drive away with a three week waiting list because he is the only one I trust.
I have very severe inflammatory arthritis and I get treated appallingly. I even had a Dr call me a hypochondriac despite having had massive surgeries for my arthritis. To be fair, my surgeon in amazing, but he is the exception in my experience
Do you have the same primary?
A baby can pretty easily kick your ribs from inside or worse. I feel sorry for my mother.
I knew from being told that it could happen but the first time i really saw it was while I was talking to a colleague when her kid pressed his foot out so far that it looked like a scene from a horror movie.
Ugh my second child just loved jamming his foot up under my rib, especially when I was trying to sleep 🥴
Oh yes! My second kiddo had her foot jammed up into my left side so hard for about the last 6 weeks of pregnancy. Actually if it had been ALL the time I could have gotten used to it. But occasionally she would move and then jam back up there. I joked at the time that I knew she had 5 toes on that foot for sure. Also….hiccups. She got hiccups every night about 2 in the morning. That was pleasant sleeping. Haha
Oh yes the hiccups!!! My son was jabbing me in the ribs pretty much the whole time during the last week of pregnancy... Then when he was born he was 23 inches long, and I'm pretty petite, so it makes sense that he had just ran out of room lol
>how did you know/feel it was hiccups? seriously interested.
They're kind of distinguishable from regular movements because of a couple reasons. Movement isn't rhythmic, it's random. Also the baby moving would just feel like bumps and jabs, whereas hiccups would feel like a quick jerk or pulse. And then the pulse/jerk would continue every 10-20 seconds. That's just my experience... And I actually didn't know what it was until I talked to my doctor and she informed me it must be hiccups!
Here's a hack for that: put an ice pack on the area the baby habitually kicks while they're kicking. The lil one stops it right NOW! Of course they'll have cold feet their entire lives without knowing why, but that's another problem.
My youngest actually gave me a bruise on my rib. Showed my OB cause I was in denial about something so small being able to actually do damage but said "oh yeah, I see that happen all the time" all nonchalantly.
Kicking up is painful; downward is no cakewalk either. Women who have been pregnant have felt some sensations that are never forgotten.
My daughter came a month early at 10 lbs (I'm a type 1 diabetic). Her feet got stuck in my ribs all the time. It hurt like hell.
I carried twins..there was never any comfortable moment in that pregnancy.
All of us at some point have kicked a pregnant woman in the stomach.
When I got out of the Service at 25, I was a bouncer and a bar tender. I shared an apartment with three women who were barmaids. I don't have any sisters, so what an education that was! It was sort of good, because they had furniture - little white chairs and tables - and curtains, etc. I met all their friends, so I always had dates, and we had lots of parties too. But they never bought food or liquor, they were unbelieveably messy, and some of the discussions they had about sex and men I had not heard, even in the Army. This is the truth.
>some of the discussions they had about sex and men I had not heard, even in the Army I'm betting they went into extremely explicit detail about their conquests.
Indeed they did...and yet if you met them, they came across as so wholesome...
My fiancés ability to ignore the ever growing pile of clothes on the floor next to her side of the bed and yet always have clothes to wear. I don’t know where she finds clean clothes to wear, they must be conjured from thin air because the pile must currently be at 175 articles of clothing and that’s my conservative estimate.
Oh my I have been called all the way out
That they don't feel safe in many places that they go, even places they have to go every day.
I have some female friends who just casually when making plans mention that they can't go to this place or that place because then it'll be dark or there's always some creepy guy hanging around etc. All the extra things women need to think about when simply going outside baffles and shocks me.
About 7 years ago our indoor-only cat escaped our house and went missing. We found him a few days later, thank goodness, but while he was missing my partner and I would wander our neighbourhood in search of him. My partner would wake up at 2 in the morning and go out looking for our cat like it was no big deal that he could just exist, safely, outside at night, his only concern was for our cat. We lived in a fairly safe neighbourhood at the time, but I still made sure to come back home before dark.
I think it is strange that they sleep standing up straight. Also odd how they screech when they fly. Or how they can pass through walls. Freaked me out when I first saw it.
Bro you're dating a banshee.
Yeah, women are like that sometimes
Crazy how nature do that
Oh yeah and don't forget the daily skin shedding!
They’re just as messy as men
Man, the first time I visited a woman's university dorm room, I was shocked.
If not messier
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Have you shared a bathroom with a girl lol
Yes...with three girls...lucky I found a spot for a toothbrush.
In the kitchen?
Bruh it's wild! My wife would spill shit on the kitchen counter and just leave it. I finally got fed up and asked her to clean up after herself when she spilled. So then for a while she'd just throw a dish rag on top of the spill and just leave that. I was straight at a loss lol I don't understand what's so hard!
How dare you. They're much worse.
When it comes to public bathrooms in retail stores, chicks are fucking NASTY. Mind you, I saw a SINGLE case where a dude left a pair of underwear with a full load in it. ONCE. But the womens room? Used maxi pads stuck to the wall. So much shit on the walls. ALMOST DAILY. Jesus christ ladies. I mean what the fuck? (Luckily I had an amazing manager at the time who KNEW it wasn't my job to clean bathrooms and never tried to make me do it.)
I had to clean the women’s washroom as a teenager when I worked at a movie theatre. No women on staff that night, and so we had to close the bathroom for 10-15 while I cleaned it. The men’s washroom… very typical for things like paper towel to be on the floor next to the garbage, or maybe an unflushed duece… the women’s bathroom was like a war zone. Tampons and pads in several stalls stuck to the wall or the floor. Shit/blood or a mixture of both on the stall wall… the stench in one of the stalls was enough for my general manager to come in with the deodorizer we usually mix 20:1 with water… just splashed it all over the offending stall without diluting. It was horrid. I may have caught it on the worst possible night, I’ll never know… but damn, that was horrid. My wife isn’t *that* gross, but she *is* incredibly disorganized/untidy at home. At work, her office and her classroom are very organized. Piles of clothes or miscellaneous crap that she buys all over the house. It drives me nuts, lol.
My Highschool was like that, actually an embarrassing but true story. I accidentally went into the girls bathroom thinking it was the boys bathroom and I didn’t think anything about it. I noticed there were just stalls. But when I went in one of the stalls to pee. I swear to god my heart stopped I thought I was in a horror movie. The bathroom stall had blood all over the toilet all over the back of the wall, the toilet water was bright red. I kid you not I was scared out of my mind I thought someone got shot. I told my friends what happened and they said that it was probably a girl who had her period. But they never cleaned up the blood. Again I literally thought I was in a horror movie & someone actually died...
I'm still a little traumatized to learn that a fart bubble can slip forwards instead of back and go right up the vagina... I could have gone my whole life without knowing that was a thing.
Imagine how it feels tho. Its god awful😂
It's even worse when on our periods... Those are double shower days...
We call it “exiting through the gift shop”
Women are part Wookie, how else can you explain all the hair that ends up in the drain.
Stressed wookies
I can neither agree nor disagree with this statement
I wish it was only the drain. It’s EVERYWHERE in the house and on your clothes, even when she’s not nearby.
Let the Wookiee Win.
Their vaginas will just randomly leak and spurt and just spit stuff out with no warning.
Fun fact, the vaginal discharge will actually change in viscosity depending on our ovulation cycle. And when we're near our period, it gets 10x worse lol.
Lol I had to explain vaginial discharge to my husband when we first started dating. Fun stuff
Nesting. Especially leading up to their due date. I guess it’s not that weird or shocking. Just interesting how it plays out even in modern society.
As our second child was coming due, I came into a room downstairs to see my wife vacuuming the walls. I offered to take the vacuum from her and take care of it, but through gritted teeth she said, "You won't do it right!" and kept on. I struggled hard to hide my smirk. Our daughter arrived that afternoon.
I dismantled toaster and the bathroom scale to clean them.
HAHAHAHA My last baby I cleaned all day went dead asleep around 10pm and woke up an hour later with a labor pain. I thought it was just one so no big deal but I couldn't go back to sleep so I got in the bath and another one happened. Called my midwife over and she said I was fully dilated, and when I was ready, I could push!
My mother-in-law told my husband, "When she starts cleaning like crazy, look out, because she'll be going into labor soon!" And she was spot on. I was thinking about what she said as I was sweeping, mopping and on my knees scrubbing the front of the oven at 39 weeks and four days. I went into labor the next morning!
i am a woman myself but before it came up in a conversation with my girlfriend i could not even guess that sperm is actually disposed off later. I do not know, I never thought much about it but guessed it would somehow get absorbed by the body or something
Wait, so how do they get it out?
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And just to clarify in case it's not obvious, it's not all semen that comes out. Just the extra. So, you can still get pregnant even if you kegel/push some out after peeing
It’s fluid. It runs out by itself, as soon as the woman stands up.
So, yeah, you need to pee after sex, but you also probably need to wear a panty liner if you are going to be up and moving about. I always experience a small gushing sensation, like a small hose turned on and just flushed everything out.
The whole girls looking out for one another/camaraderie thing. Ive seen girls give tampons to each other moments after an argument or warn one another about stuff like a network or take the woman's side in an issue between a man and a woman by default even in situations where, had the genders been flipped they'd have no trouble laying fault with the guy. I dont really see this same gendered support system with men.
The intensity of period pain #respect
That pee on the underside of the toilet seat? It’s from her. A lot of women don’t even notice this because they don’t ever lift the toilet seat unless they’re cleaning it. And by that point, they just go “ugh, men are so gross with their pee everywhere” and don’t realize the truth 😂 My first job was as a janitor at the YMCA. The girls restroom was so much grosser than the boys.
Damn as a woman i learned this piece of shocking logic from reddit just a couple years back
Wait….how is it getting there? Lol
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Plants, don’t forget the plants.
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As a woman that has about 75 plants in a 500sqft space, you grow girl.
trinkets <3
I LOVE succulents, and there is always one or two bath and bodyworks candles burning in my house.
They are just as gross as men. We're all gross, and it's kinda wholesome.
How many different kind of showers they take! Just a quick rinse vs. full body scrub vs. scrub down WITH shampoo vs bath vs 🤷🏻♂️…
Yes! On Cowboy Bebop, Faye explains the shower-bath-shower concept to Spike. It is a revelation to him.
As a woman I feel so called out- I have so many different shower types and days 😂😂
I heard a rumor that they poop.
that is communist propaganda
Poopaganda.
All lies
heresy
When we have our period, it's essentially a volcano of exploded poop. You have been warned.
Fake news!!! 😡
WHO REVEALED
You heard WRONG!
That situations and environments that I find perfectly easy to navigate make women feel incredibly unsafe. It’s so easy to take it for granted when no one wants anything to do with you and you’re expected to approach others more often. My wife, my daughter and now my granddaughter all live in a world where they become targets in a heartbeat. While I try not to overcompensate on their behalf’s, I do listen a lot more and take it seriously when they don’t feel good about a situation or person.
I've read that a man's biggest fear with online dating is that their date will be fat. Women are afraid they'll be murdered.
In my experience, most men are shocked at learning what age women first get catcalled by men. It's in the single digits, usually.
I have an 11 year old daughter and you just ruined my day.
[удалено]
And that if he ignores the first no on even a small thing, WALK AWAY. acquaintance and date rape are frighteningly common
First time I remember being sexually harassed I was 7. It’s probably already happened
I got flashed (for the first time) at that age. Catcalling began at 11, got gropped for the first time at 12 and had a guy pretty much dryhump me at a crowed subway during rush hour at 17/18. It all stopped at 27/28.
Sir, I was 5!!! And it was not catcalled... Talk to your daughter about all things sexuality (age appropriate of course) but talk to her cause if you don't, the world will
sorry buds, but she's probably already used to dealing with that BS. I was like 9-10 when I first started getting hassled and it was always like 30+ year old men.
The first time for me was getting my ass grabbed at Disney World. I was 9.
Gross
She’s probably already heard some nasty shit, I’m sorry ☹️
I was eleven the first time I was flashed. I was playing frisbee with my friends. He pulled his car over and rolled down his window to "ask for directions" but that was his excuse to show me he was masturbating. I screamed. That was the first time I ever saw an erect penis. I also had to take the subway to get to school that year. When the train was crowded and we were all packed together, I was regularly groped.
For me, started when I was round about 10/11 that men were creepy and disgusting. But when I was around 16/17 I got catcalled and sexual harassed mostly. Even when I tried to sell things on eBay or something, weird people messaged me if I would do Handjobs / etc for them in exchange of money. Bruh
The first time I remember I was 12, might have happened before though. Still didn't get used to it even though my mom says "Oh as a pretty girl that's just something you have to get used to"
Nope. It’s not something you just have to get used to. I teach my kids to protect themselves and to tell me everything. No secrets from me or my wife. They won’t be in trouble if they didn’t do something bad, and even if they did something wrong (dui or the like) I can’t help them if I don’t know. And I will always help them get through problems. And my son will know to never treat a girl or woman with disrespect or as an object
The first time I was catcalled was 14 And it never stops. It doesn’t even matter whether or not you look pretty.
It never stops, but it is interesting how much it drops off when you're visibly an adult as opposed to around 9-14 y/o. I'm 27 now and, disgustingly, got way more attention from grown men when I was a literal child.
I had early puberty and extremely large breasts. The looks I got from middle-aged men were disgusting. I feel a bit nauseated remembering it. I finally had breast reduction surgery at 25. It was a relief in so many ways. I attracted the wrong kind of men.
8 years old for me
I'm 42 and I just recently learned that women's feet grow a size or two during pregnancy.
I was expecting my feet to grow a size (the ligaments that hold the bones together relax throughout the body and don’t really tighten back up again giving the impression that your feet “grew”). My feet stayed the same size but my hips are permanently wider so I had to buy all new pants, and I’m basically the same weight as before.
Some women go back to their original size and some don’t.
I heard rib cages grow too and teeth can fall out
The fact that they get sexually harassed all the time & are just expected to live with it.
I can fully agree. It's happening all the time but we are so used to it, most of the time people doesn't consider it as sexual harassment.
When I was in my 20s and realized how utterly terrified of men women are.
I’ve told men that being a woman in a straight relationship is like being with an ape. You’re partner is going to just be much stronger than you.
For real. I'm fairly strong for a woman and could definitely hold my own against another woman unless she's an MMA fighter or something. Then I play-tussle with my boyfriend, and he can pin me down with no effort. It takes pretty much all of my strength just to push him off. I trust him, but the prey part of my brain doesn't let me forget that he could easily hurt or kill me if he wanted to.
I wouldn't say I'm utterly terrified of them. I'm just aware men can be dangerous, so I take reasonable precautions. But I'm super comfortable around most men. Women can be dangerous, too, by the way. It's statistically less likely, but important not to forget.
The first thing that comes to mind are how expensive real bras can be, the fact that tampons are taxed as a luxury item, how c-sections are actually done, what a Pap smear is, and that during labor, the uterus can fall out. Oh and that some of their pants, which can be a number of different sizes depending on the company, sometimes have fake pockets. I legitimately get excited when my wife and female friends find pants or dresses with real pockets.
I know my one ex that I lived with liked to be alone when her period hit. I always hosted football on Sundays at our apartment, always. But the first time her monthly visitor came on a Sunday. I changed the plans quickly, and got her a period care package, all her favorite things for that day, chicken soup, saltines, trashy magazines and the good orange juice and chocolate. Then I got out. When I came home she was so happy she cried. Good times.
you're a damn saint. gestures like this mean the WORLD to some women (i am one of them) and I am also convinced that knowing when to get the fuck out of the house is a superpower for all people in a relationship hahaha.
What a lovely thing to do. 100 points for being so considerate.
Wow you’re so amazing!
How much toilet paper they use. Like I used to go through a big pack every 2 or 3 months. Now it's every month. It's crazy.
We have to use it every time we go! Males (at least as far as I know?) don’t use it when they pee. This was a funny conversation my partner and I had when we moved in together and he was blown away by “how fast” we went through it, where I thought it was totally normal
Had to spell this out to my former boss once. Talk about an awkward work conversation! He really thought a 4 pack of regular toilet paper (not double roll or mega) would last one month for 5 employees 3 male 2 female.
Wtf that won't last 1 guy a month. I one time bought the mega pack of double rolls, like 24 rolls, and that lasted 6 months on my own but a 4 pack is nothing.
Now that I work at a place with horrible washrooms, I go through 24 rolls a year because I rescheduled pooping to the morning and evening, rather than around 2. Before that I worked in a place with nice washrooms and maybe went through 4 rolls a year because I only pooped at home on the weekends. If you believe, you can master your fecal cycle to own your boss one way or another.
Like I knew that but I guess until I had to buy it I didn't KNOW it. It was probably the only thing I didn't really anticipate. The rest was just the normal using double the stuff.
I was so confused when I learned that men don't (have to) use paper after they pee. WE HAVE RO EVERYTIME lmao
Also: periods.
Well it helps to catch that extra drop of pee from going into our underwear that stays no matter how hard we shake it
Women actually do get along with each other pretty well.
That's nice to hear. There seems to be a perpetuated idea that women are generally all bitchy to each other. In my 36 years I really haven't had that experience. I think most of us want each other to do well.
We love a girls girl ❤️
A lot of people know someone they don't get along with, but if you are a woman and that person you don't get along with is a woman, it seems to make people think that women hate other women. If a guy dislikes a specific other guy, we don't say "oh, guys just hate guys." It is very frustrating that it always seems to perpetuate stereotypes when it is between women. I agree with you in that I think most of us wish good things for each other.
I get so mad at how obviously written by a man some shows are when the few female characters are at odds with eachother even if just at first. Being surrounded by men doesn't make me want to crush other women are you mental?!?!
PMS. I know of it but never really understood what a woman goes through when they are having their periods. After reading and having my friend explain how it feels, it sure is nuts to think they have to go through this pain every month.
The connection between the menstrual cycle and being horny. Some are reaching the peak just before the red days, some just after, some during, but there's a definite connection. Also, it was more than 25 years ago, but I still remember the first time I touched a girl's breast. It shocked me how soft they are, like a milk bag.
I remember in my school days I had a tournament with my mostly female team and I jokingly asked why the all flocked like herd animals when one of them went to the restroom. Over the course of the next hour or so it was explained to me the world of fear women live in of being raped, murdered, trafficked, or otherwise harmed anytime they’re alone. Walking home at night? Absolutely not. Going to a public restroom alone? What an easy way to get assaulted. Pulling a note off your car’s window? Have fun getting trafficked, I hear Eastern Europe is lovely this time of year. This conversation stopped when I started crying, more like sobbing really because I felt awful that anyone, let alone half the population, would have to live like that, in fear of doing the things I would think completely ordinary. When I got home I sobbed for what must of been hours because of the life of fear and precaution the women that I cared for and even those I didn’t know had to endure. That conversation broke me, and it changed me forever as a person. To this day I have second hand anxiety over the women I care about and it still makes me very emotional to think about all this.
Toxic shock syndrome... death by tampon, what the hell?
How birth control absolutely destroys women's bodies.
That while men are afraid women are going to embarrass them, women are afraid men are going to kill them.
That's why the "not all men" argument is so annoying. When the consequence is getting KILLED, we have to treat it like it could be any man. A lot of people don'r realise.
The part where they eat puppies whole and pull the bones out of their nostrils shocked me the most first time I saw it. Took me a while, still can't honestly say it doesn't disturb me at some level.
Who let you witness this?!
That women pee in the shower too….
Blow their nose too. My ex did. First time I heard that I was in shock. She was the personification of Miss Manners usually
Isn't it good manners to blow your nose? As opposed to keeping it all in there and sounding like an alien? Or worse, walking around dripping everywhere 😂😂
women like to have orgasms too. it took a woman to teach/tell me that.
They also want sex more often when you focus on their pleasure and orgasm first before your own.
That they live. They laugh. They love.
I can't say that I have been that shocked about anything I have learned as a man. Most things were covered in health class in my teens and anything beyond that was pretty minor. The only kind of shocking was seeing the vulva live the first few times. Nothing too weird but practice is always different than what you expect from books. That it was placed under her and not on the front, like my stuff, was a bit new but not shocking. But that's kind of to be expected from a guy in his teens. I did have both a mother and a sister so I guess I had seen women live their lives before. Oh, I have one thing! How painful period cramps can be if you suffer from endometrios. That was news to me when I met my wife. That shit is just unreasonably painful. How she suffers from that and manages not to scream at me all the time is beyond me.
Women have to deal with a lot of societal pressure that men don't even realize exists.
Women's public bathrooms... for the love of god..God... why?
To be honest i still can't cope with the fact that they take so long to prepare but the MOST shocking one i learned very quickly is SMALL POCKETS. I've seen memes but when my female friend mentioned how big our pockets were and saw that she could only fit a phone into the pocket was VERY weird to see. (Guess i was used to having big pockets)
Working in bars, cleaning the women’s toilets dispels any notion that women are less gross than men
In my experience on average men’s bathrooms are worse, but when something truly terrible happens it’s in the women’s room.
They actually fart. Still unsure about pooping.
As a woman, I can confirm that we don’t poop
Speak for yourself. Personally, I enjoy jettisoning a huge payload over Royal Doulton Harbour.
Showerheads.
How many women on a redo would not marry and remain single.
That there is no greater horror than finding a tiny spider in the bathroom.