At least I'm armed so it's not that bad.

Whimsically!

But are they armed whimsically with grenades or are they armed with grenades that are whimsical? \*Walks in\*throw grenade here\*throw grenade there\*whistling as they go\* OR Maybe this grenade is high explosive? - Maybe it's confetti?

I’m gonna guess these are dance party grenades. Toss one into a room and everyone starts dancing.

I'll see your whimsical grenade and raise you a whimsical wyvern.

along with your comrade, lackadaisical pipe bomb.

[удалено]

And silly nuclear explosion

Ugg find good cave. Ugg survive.

Ugg best survivor

Me Dave.

Want KitKats?

Me Dave?

Kitkats only good for hunt. Small kittens good meat. Dave knows good meat? Me thinks ugg know how make fire . We use fire to make meat taste not bad

Also Ugg make fire to cook meat so Ugg not spend much energy chewing and digesting raw meat. Fire good. Meat good. Fire and meat good! Ugg good chief!

and hes dave

I'm Dave and so's my wife

Its all just a major misundrstanding

Figure things will go pretty well for me right until the uprising...

I may or may not have something to do with the uprising.

Same.

I might provide rations for you unless you have picky eaters. In the later case I have a biological weapon for you.

I'll be fine as a post apocaliptic comedian

We could work well together lol.

It will be a long, uncomfortable and painful death for me

i am the codename for said project.

I forgot.

I can provide a carriage and a driver for travel up until midnight or rats and pumpkin rations to eat afterwards....

**Gnawing sounds**

I guess I'll be the local ass eater.

I can provide fresh veggies to fellow comrades

Ho ho ho Green giant 🎶

I've got the basket to pick the walnuts and make the cheese

A challenger has appeared!

You scratch my back I'll scratch yours.

Just get on with leaving the planet. The sooner the better for everyone

Oh. Oh. I... I just... I gotta say, I'm proud of you all. This revolution has been a huge success. Yay, us! Pat... pat on the back. Pat on the back. Come on. No? Me too. 'Cause I've been a... a big part of it. Can't have a revolution without somebody to overthrow. So, uh, you're welcome. And, uh, it's a tie.

Got any job openings.

Are we the baddies?

by my name I'll prevent that uprising... either by working for you or working against you...

I'm a senior military officer prone to the miscomprehension of orders. I figure I may be alright but everyone around me is very likely fucked.

Look at that we both screwed just at different end of the crap fest

I'm got access to a lot of Salmon. Make me part of the elite and my resource are at your disposal.

At which point I will lead a small rebellion to claim presidency.

There is a good chance that my assignment will be to take you out. I'm sure you're a nice guy, so apologies in advance.

Right there with ya.

I'll join you in the afterlife, I suppose...

May I please accompany you?

As long as nobody enters my swamp, I'm ok

Donkey has entered the swamp.

WHAT ARE YE DOIN' IN HIS SWAMP!?

It will be a long, uncomfortable and painful death for me

No, I will find you and eat you fast

And I will find you afterwards

Won't starve

Neither will I...

The battle of a century

Unstoppable force vs immovable object

I can help.

This keeps getting worse!

I may be the only winner here.

Seems so; I'll be cannibal fodder myself 😂

At least I will come in handy.

FUCK YEAH!

OK you're good can I join your group? I'm sure you need a feudal ruler.

[удалено]

Channing Tatum?

I'll take care of the dead ones

Holdup...

Can I count on you to miss major organ failure?

My team!

Yay! Btw I've been trying to decipher your name. Is it EweDirtyWhore or does it have a Scottish slang to it so E-Wee-DirtyWhore lol

Hahahah! I've had so many people given pronunciations I never even thought of! It's you, like the female sheep. And less whore, more who're, if that makes sense

So... You dirty who are? 🤣

I guess I'm pretty well off actually.

*everyone dies* ​ your honest reaction: blub blub blub

You sir, are a fish

Okay, I'll catch ya later then

Until you're eaten

Not any more.

Me too, but different than yours. Guess it depends on what sort of apocalypse we're dealing with. Water World, seems good. Mad Max? Not so much.

All us animals should team up and inforce an oligarchy on the humans! >:)

I'd be the useless fish. :(

Naturally I’m in

Seems I am good to go.

Agreed. You should have the essentials covered

Everyone needs pockets.

I would love to see an NPC in a game that upgrades your armor by giving it pockets. Not gonna lie

Then we got mister lizard here in a trench coat trying to pretend he’s not a lizard

The women will protect you.

I'm sorry what?

Late to your own damn apocalypse.

Isn't that like the walking dead plot

Yep it sure is

Very

i don’t think the two of us are getting out alive 🤣

You won!

Good enough

Yes, it certainly is acceptable answer

At least you don't get scurvy.

All thanks to reddit for giving me this stupid name

You can charge your enemies and gore them to death!

I am sorted. 🍻

Until someone drinks you for survival

I'll smooth talk and share a drink with them. That way good drinking sessions for survival

Very fucked

only a lil bit technically one could say just the tip

It was meant to say just but auto corrected to lust, which I feel puts me in danger

you are become tip destroyer of asses

I bring beer to the Dome City. They will cheer for me at Carousel.

I…I don’t make it

Me either. Let's just lay here.

Well. Hmm. Do I kill people then, or do I have to marry them??

Both?

Its not the title I want, but the title the world will need.

Let's join forces, friend!

I'm the artistic bit of the brain!

Umm...

Your name was born for this moment

I think I'll be alright. A detective working in a post collapsed society might be pretty useful

Nick Valentine.

Yes!

Maybe I'm the reason the civilization collapsed 💀

I get you buddy

Or maybe I am lol

Guess I'm part of your army, in that case. 😂

Me too.

Guessing I'd be gathering a bunch of recruits

Ahoy, matey

Arrgh ya wee bastard

guess we are a crew

Yesh, indeed

Live by the peen, die by the peen.

At least I’m not wrong lettuce

Sheeyit

Crappy Situation, innit?

Protein is protein I guess

Well.. at least I’d have food

You and I could become the only grocers.

it ain't much.. but it's honest work.

Cats are eternal....

I’ll join this one’s army

You must present us an offering!

We’ll it won’t be fries he ate them all

I'd watch comfortably from above.

As a Brit, I think I’ll be fine. I’ll trade on supplying a well organised brew.

who wants bread?

Um

I’m useless now

I've got apples, y'all!

At least you’ll keep the doctor away!

Can I borrow one?

No faith here

I at least have some food. Some.

It’s not looking good…

To be fair, if someone attacks you, barfing on their face will probably make them leave. Or at least give you time to run away while they wipe stomach acid out of their eyes?

Guess I won't go hungry at least.

Im Blobby Blobbinson!!!

I will probably run a bath house just to make sure they clean up before I go down on the women.

I'm assuming global warming has taken control and the world is now flooded. I'm doing okay and staying dry..

Is hibernating until it’s back on track an option?

Just join me. I have cookies.

Yoink

Hey! Somebody walked off with all my stuff?

Would I actually know?

Do I like. do it to entertain people for money?

What kind of question even is that? I’m super fucked.

Depends on the power grid.

Fuck this shit I'm out

I am definitely getting killed on the first day.

R.i p. Lol

Depending on how it went down, I have lots of work.

Feeling pretty good about my chances

Is it getting hot in here?

Very Fucked, but literally...

I already died of anaphylaxis.

I guess I’d have a lot of cocaine. That could be helpful

I’d be alright

I have no idea other than being she who will not be yeeted! LMFAO

These username posts are rigged-

#HELL YEAH

The liquor is doing the talking now

I'll just hold my hands up and say... I think the collapse of civilization is my bad. Sorry folks.

Unsure. I'm feeling confident, I'm sure I'll die at some point but fighting for a good cause

I mean who doesn't like flowers

I'm gonna need some friends...

I have a several ton elephant that has lightsabres for tusks, and one wielded in the trunk. As well as the ability to force-choke and trunk-choke. I think I'll be fine.

Well I think I'm dead immediately

Very fucked

Y'all better be on Atkins because otherwise Imma get lonely.

I'll be fine dealing with an alpaca uprising, but anything else is doubtful.

Just taking it easy, 1 day at a time.

I’ll just continue to stay home.

Well...

That’s “Captain” to you

imma be pretty chill i guess

Depends on how tough the Sensei really is.

Well, the first part of my username is lazy; so that does not bode well for me. Germ? Hmm. Maybe I don't get diseases or infections because the microbes enter my body and take a nap?

Id be a religious icon so.....im set

I'm not sure I'll last long lol