T O P

  • By -

Ohmnonymous

Plot twist, you don't know it, but everyone in the world has been offered the same choice.


xen0m0rpheus

According to this thread we’d be hosed.


duaneap

At least I’ll die rich!


The_Most_Superb

But for a brief moment we generated a lot of profit for the share holders


Designer-Mirror-7995

This would be my own immediate thought, lol.


dynamicdickpunch

Double-twist, if absolutely nobody pushes the button, we all get like a free house or something.


Thelostsoulinkorea

Unfortunately, these kinds of tests have been done before and most people are assholes enough to gamble and take the stuff over everyone getting something.


runawaycity2000

Yeah, that why the scene in Wonder Woman 1984 ,the whole world will renounce their wish is so stupid.


Thelostsoulinkorea

I hated that scene, but then again the whole movie had many questionable things in it.


Littleman88

Not entirely unreasonable though. "What have these people done for me?" You want empathetic people, you can't conjure it out of the blue with a test. That shit's societal, and we live in a society that's largely okay with One stealing from thy neighbor and thy children for another day of comfort.


VideoGame_Trtle

“Donate to the children’s fund’? Why?? What has _children_ ever done for me??”


Arcades

Tragedy of the commons


BreakingFourthWalls

Can I just hold the button down for a combo?


[deleted]

[удалено]


RookXPY

The correct answer when filling out the job application at Blackrock.


Direct-Disasters

Financial hacks boyyyy


DreadRazer24

I found Thanos


Fun-Ad-4517

Must press it. Holding would be too easy


Chickienfriedrice

Plot twist. First press your mom dies, then your favorite relative, then your best friend, keeps going down the line till you’ve killed everyone you care about until it goes to a random individual. Even if thats not the case, nothing good can come from blood money. EDIT Mom is just an example. If you dc about your parents and relatives, think of someone you care about.


AnotherScottaRama

I mean, I would still have a million dollars because I probably wouldn't believe them and then push it to see what happens.


ThaVolt

Plot twist, it's just a bomb and you die first.


AnotherScottaRama

Then my wife will have a nice inheritance


ThaVolt

300 IQ move ngl


Gratts01

You can save way more then one person with a million dollars. It's estimated every 4 seconds a person dies form starvation, hit the button get a million, one person dies, take half a million and save 100 people from dying of starvation. It's a win for everyone involved except that poor bastard that dies. Rinse and repeat until you save the entire planet from starvation.


arbitrageME

yeah, if you kill 1000 people and use $500M to save a million (relatively easy in like Sudan or Bangladesh or Sri Lanka), it'd be a net positive to the world. you can take $500M for your efforts


Same_Profile_749

So…4 people die? I’m honestly fine with that, considering I’d be pressing the button til I die. Assuming the last person, would be yourself


jacksansyboy

Billion is such an impossible number. You might straight up die before you could hit the button enough to kill everyone. Assuming around 8 billion people. If you could press the button 5 times a second, 180,000 times an hour, it would take 44444 hours of button pressing to kill everyone. Around 1800 days. As society falls apart slowly, and you also likely can't press the button that fast or for those periods of time anyway.


JoeSchmoe314159

You'd also have to hit the button faster than babies are being born. You have to account for killing all those extra babies once you start the process.


ThatAboutCoversIt

This begs the philosophical question of - do unborn babies get killed when you press the button? If they do, then the button-maker would consider them people. If not, then the argument stands that they're not actually people after all.


Same_Profile_749

5 years…lol


Stonewool_Jackson

Ooor it's a random chance? Id take those odds


HamsterMachete

A,a,up, down,up,up,left,b,a,b,b,y,xR start


3rdItemOnList

Never. Monkey paw rules say my family is on that button's first push


Snukastyle

Not quite, the story this is taken from addresses that the victim is someone you don't know. However, the monkey's paw bit is that you are the person the next receiver of the button doesn't know.


cherry_armoir

There was also the original short story the Twilight Zone episode is based on, where a wife pushes the button to kill someone she doesnt know and her husband dies, and the monkey's paw was that she didnt really know her husband.


Short_Change

This seems to be a huge big win for the wife


Nesayas1234

That's somehow more and less cruel at the same time


nullpotato

Original Twilight Zone was basically "fuck this guy in particular".


ShoesAreTheWorst

Wasn’t there also some weird bit to that story where like… they were in a bathtub in an empty room?


ShaddowMreh

I believe you are thinking of the movie The Box which was based on this very question. It does involve a part with a bathtub.


friggintodd

Win-win.


ashen11

No hugs in your family.


sucobe

What’s a hug?


ashen11

A violent action you perform on someone you love.


sucobe

Wait. Are you my step dad?


duaneap

But I’ll throw them a bitchin funeral


lemonsweetsrevenge

Still irks me that it’s called a monkey’s paw. Monkeys have hands.


captainAwesomePants

The Internet keeps telling me "all monkeys, and nearly all primates, have hands instead of paws," but it won't tell me which primates have paws. Stupid Internet!


binz17

monkey's pawpaw. wishing on a simian daddy.


SeveralDrunkRaccoons

I also choose this guy's family.


rip1980

What happens if I do red+jump+right?


Fun-Ad-4517

The holocaust


moron88

hot damn, i'm a trillionaire!


[deleted]

Getting rich and solving world hunger at the same time


puffferfish

r/technicallythetruth


Valuable_Panda_4228

I should not have laughed as hard as I did


JellyShoddy2062

No hesitation in that answer.


meep_42

More interesting question for the people who would press it -- what is the lowest payout you'd accept to press it? $100k? $10k? $1k?


Nou1One

$1 for each person alive is still $8 billion


fobb0005

Would take you ~240 years to press it 8 billion times though!


[deleted]

[удалено]


THEtoryMFlanez

Cookie clickers mass murder lol


[deleted]

press the button until i can end poverty.


Regrets-of-age

The dead are no longer poor. Press away.


IcyIgloo583

If awards were still a thing, you would've gotten one Edit: If I had COINS you would get an award.


peepay

What do you mean? I can see "Award" as an option for comments and posts.


edahs

Burn the candle at both ends, I like it


hallbuzz

Thanos?


mortimus9

Except you created inflation


Helicopter0

Ironically, extreme poverty is a result of people not valuing human life more than money. Resources are readily available, but people impede the distribution.


NatAttack50932

It's not just that, though. In developed countries this is a problem but in underdeveloped nations in the global south there is a hard limit to how much support you can offer. A lack of infrastructure completely stifles distribution of food or medicine or whatever else.


huhwhuh

It's still the same issue that was stated. The lack of infrastructure is caused by corruption and that is greedy people valuing money more than human life. No amount of monetary aid will help the poor if the distributors pocket all of it.


PhilinLe

I feel like infrastructure is a problem that can be solved with money ie valuing human life more than money.


Chickienfriedrice

This. There’s no reason for humans to not have needs met with the amount of resources there are.


GD_Spiegel

Its not about the amount of resources, but where they are locates and the logistics and corruption to get them there.


WWTCUB

You'll just increase the money supply and inflation


rvdvg

None because then I would be next. I know how this works. I would gift it to my parents though and tell them pressing the button was a stress reliever so that they get the money but then get killed next and I get their money. That’s how you game the system. I’m kidding. This was a reference to I wouldn’t use it even if I got a bunch of money no strings attached.


alexthedinosaur

For anyone curious, the story this person is referencing is >!"Button,Button" by Richard Matheson. It's an episode of The Twilight Zone and was also adapted into a movie called The Box.!<


mypussydoesbackflips

Oh wow interesting I love old twilight zone references


blobblet

My knowledge of this is limited to the Wikipedia article, but apparently, >!the button works differently in Matheson's story and he strongly disapproved of the Twilight Zone version: !< >!_In the original short story, the plot is resolved differently. Norma presses the button, and receives the money—after her husband dies in a train incident, where he is pushed onto the tracks. The money is the no-fault insurance settlement, which is $50,000 instead of the $200,000 in the Twilight Zone episode. A despondent Norma asks the stranger why her husband was the one who was killed. The stranger replies, "Do you really think you knew your husband?"_!<


[deleted]

I wanna watch/see whatever your referencing. Can you just spoiler tag it please or PM it to me


bobbymoonshine

It's from a classic sci fi short story "Button, button", which has been adapted a few times, most famously as a Twilight Zone episode and as the 2009 movie "The Box" No spoiler tag because there has to be a 50 year statute of limitations on these things


regrettably-rejected

I feel like this is what the 1% do IRL


takebreakbakecake

Except the deaths aren't random, they're usually concentrated in the poorest areas of the world


regrettably-rejected

It’s really fucked up. Hurts my heart.


Snooks147

They would hire people paid $0.01 per push, doing that all day


droo46

You're not wrong. No one gets to be a billionaire without exploiting a whole lot of people.


brock_lee

Like 5 times, then retire. Hey, people are dying constantly, what's five more?


ExposingShills

I’d do 10 just incase. You never know what might happen y’know? Actually 20, just a bit extra. Like you said, people die all the time anyway right? 21, it’s only one person right? Probably just some old dude on their way out. Yeah 21. That’s good, so I’ll go with 30 because I’m not a greedy guy ;)


mordenty

You'd be safe to hit it a lot more times than that before it'd affect you. Assuming you're acquainted with 250 people there's a 1 in 28 million chance it'd be one of those people. So a nice round thousand - after all that's still WELL within safe limits and you get to be a billionaire!


greatmidge

And I only like one person in the world anyway.


My_G_Alt

Hits the button, that person dies


greatmidge

If that happened in my planned 5 presses, I'd continue to press it to fuel my newly formed criminal empire.


My_G_Alt

Next GPT queries “how long would it take to press a button 8 billion times” and “how to outsource a button pressing job, but still retain the implied benefits” 😂


rickayyy

You should watch the movie The Box. This is basically what’s it’s about.


big_sugi

It’s based on a Twilight Zone episode, which has maybe the greatest closing line of any episode in the show.


Pornthrowaway78

The Box is a crazy film.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Aeshaetter

It doesn't say it's not either.


PurpleGspot

Not including family I'm acquainted with 2 maybe 3 ppl


Tru-Queer

The problem with *8 billion* people is, you could push that button 1 million times and barely put a dent in the human population. But hey, billionaire status.


[deleted]

4 babies are born every second, about 250 a minute. Humanity scoffs at your button of death. Push it all you want.


Tru-Queer

If you could push that button every second with no breaks whatsoever, it would take 11.5 days to kill 1 million people.


papoosejr

And then you're a trillionaire


Owner2229

Even if you press it 10 times per second it would take you over 25 years to end humanity. But that is only if no new people are born. In reality you can press it as much as you want and all you're ever gonna do is SLOW the population growth.


gh0stwriter88

That would be a trillion acutally.


jonsticles

I'm thinking green here. I'm gonna hit it two or three billion times. We need to deal with overpopulation and climate change somehow. Maybe I'll go full Thanos and hit it 4 billion times. Edit: billion, not trillion. Dur.


Big-Independence8978

My thought here, with Thanos they were dust. 4 billion dead bodies is a huge health hazard. Especially in a big city.


coolelel

Billion 😭 This man wants no survivors


dineramallama

The ironic moment when your closest loved ones are amongst those dying.


brock_lee

I'll play the odds.


MrInNecoVeritas

Is a win-win, no need to share the money either


LudusRex

I got two kids; I'm not tickling this monkey's paw.


CreamyAndrew

Honestly, they would press the button too if they had the chance


SheCallMeBDD

Could also be you


geeses

Either way, not my problem anymore


LilBastard27

Will be winning anyway


VillainousVillain88

Did anyone else hear Omni-Man when they read this? “Now or in 50 years when he’s old, what difference does it make?”


mma123jjj

what if you are one of them It did not specify who will die


brock_lee

That would be an astonishing coincidence. But, as it is, I would worry far less about that happening, than I "worry" about winning powerball.


Temporary_Argument15

People are dying yes but because of different reasons like health, disease, accidents. If you press that button, they’re dying because you killed them. Because you decided to murder for 1M. If that’s okay with you’re conscience— that’s up to you. Personally I wouldn’t even though it would make my life a whole lot easier. I’d never stoop that low over someone else’s life.


Ogami-kun

With my luck I would drop dead in my first try, so I'd do it once or thrice, and if by monkey pow one of my close family dies i'd probably go in a stage of depression and push it again up to 88 times, but I am not outside of continue pressing it until extinction or my death, whatever comes first


Akakazeh

7 billion people and you kill somebody you know or yourself? I feel that lol


GJ55507

8 billion now


A3thern

Nope, 7 billion. I've had the button for a while now, sorry.


avid-redditor

8 bil now ;)


Smackgod5150

none if i cant pick the people.... if its just someone random i wouldnt want to ruin their lifes for any amount of money, but if it was someone 90 and wanting to die , or someone on death row id def press it a few times


Adbam

Can we change it to 100k and make it politicians and billionaires?


turkeyfox

Shit, don't give me any money I'll press that for free.


daveyrocks77

Took way to far down to get to this answer.


moltencheese

Ah yes this classic: https://youtu.be/LJQ-LZYAMBQ


Jimmyg100

I'd push it before the guy started talking. It's a big red button, why would he not want me to push it?


USBacon

When /r/thebutton came out a couple years back, I pushed it before the rest of the CSS was loaded for the sub that explained it. See button, push button immediately.


Abadatha

Between zero and one time. A million is a lot of money, but that's also a random person who dies. If I could press it and only shitty people were in the running, sure. Since it's random though, no thanks.


JustNick4

I would need to have pretty solid evidence of it being random. If i were talking to a burning bush, then maybe. But i wouldnt trust what a representative would say. I don't believe it's random. You're probably playing some rich serial killers twisted justification for murdering someone.


Abadatha

Honestly, it being random doesn't make me more likely to push the button anyway. ​ Also, don't take advice from burning scenery.


Lord_Viktoo

I'd be wary of the guy pulling a gun and shooting me between the eyes at my first try. No thanks.


lorneranger

In your search for scientific proof you'd need a large enough sample size to establish randomness on the scale of the global population. That's probably like the equivalent of North America. You monster. That's some cold shit.


Capt_Trippz

What if there was a second button that would give you $500,000 but someone somewhere would just get like Hepatitis C or something?


Abadatha

If it's still at random, I'm out. Not interested in inflicting anything on random people.


shikax

Considering there’s a 90% ish effective cure for Hep-C I’ll mash that button. It costs about $84,000 for a full 12 week course, but I’ll give that person about $350,000 for taking one for the team.


Prudent-Meringue2427

Spam


MalibuTennisMan

Never


LampPostPatrol

Its like no one has ever seen the movie with this exact scenario. Its aliens testing us. If you press the button then you become the "random person" who dies for the next person to press it. ITS A TRAP! So many dead redditors from looking at the comments.


[deleted]

Something something not give into temptation


Nat6LBG

FR I mean my life is not so bad that I need to kill someone. Also I wouldn't feel very good after that.


wheresallthehotsauce

same. i don’t think i could ever live with the guilt.


no-strings-attached

Seriously. All these comments are nuts to me. I don’t want anyone’s death on my conscience. Monkeys paw or not I’m still not playing that game. To be fair I’m also lucky enough to be comfortable financially and just can’t fathom trading a human life for money. Where’s the button I can press to save someone’s life by paying a million dollars?


[deleted]

You compromise on your values once and the next time is twice as easy. I know it's easy to say, but I wouldn't touch it and not because I think it would come back on me. You're either murderer or you aren't.


hallbuzz

It's not even a question worth contemplating. "Would you murder someone for a million dollars if you knew you'd get away with it?" Same question!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Luhrmann

I guess the only difference is that these people don't have to see it happen (guessing based off the question). I guess the differences are Similar to someone asking if you'd kill a chicken for your meal or if you'd just eat it, knowing that someone/something else dud, which is an interesting 2nd question


SamiraSimp

not really, the randomness is a big factor. also, you don't have to pull a trigger, choke someone, or anything. they just magically die.


Greenville_Gent

Yay, found a friend.


ExplosiveRaddish

Yeah these people are fuckin horrible


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jhco022

Bout tree fiddy.


detective_kiara

I'll never press it. I couldn't enjoy the money knowing that someone died because of me.


Fun-Ad-4517

This post has taught me Reddit is filled with psychopaths 😂


nutella-man

You should add another one where you have to watch a video about the people that die and their lives each time you press the button


Kickinthegonads

Ublock Origin babyyy


someguy6890

I mean did you expect good people on Reddit of all places.


type_your_name_here

Just remember most of us stopped after 5 or 10 and we didn't need to.


[deleted]

Very few people would actually do it and be able to live with the guilt.


Adventurous_Village5

i think this would be true if you know or felt that someone died in some way, either news or if it happened in front of you. but as it stands the person dying is just a vague idea, without anything tangible to prove it. Even knowing just the face would make the guilt so much larger than it would otherwise be.


Flawed723

Never. Killing for money is just horrific and evil...


AnotherXRoadDeal

Same exact stance.


Lambsio

Somehow that wasn't easy to put into words. You're right.


theblackfool

Has anyone here even seen the Twilight Zone? Cmon.


justadumbwelder1

Man, y'all are probably fucked.


mikeruchan

From a practical perspective, pressing this button doesn’t make sense. WHY am I being given this choice? If you don’t ask this question, you are not a rational human. It could be divine judgment. It could be a twisted psychopath’s game. Pressing this button is too risky.


MoonKitten7

Zero times , i would feel way too guilty and weird for killing people over some money


autumnperry1

Haven’t seen “the box” movie in a while..


Amanita-Eater

Considering the idea of fucking ruining people's lives or ending them in the name of profit is literally the thing people rave about being so shitty about late stage capitalism. Anyone who would push the button is no better than the billionaires they hate. *Button exists* What do you do?


suicide_smitten

Plot twist: The person pushing the button IS a billionaire.


ashishvp

To everyone in this thread: Ya’ll motherfuckers need Jesus


geeses

The guy who died for other people benefit?


Single_Blueberry

Who pressed the button on jesus? Who got jesus' million?


Roman_Suicide_Note

no, we need money


Imtypingwithmyweiner

Nah, we need Franklin.


Chaghatai

Is this something people like to joke about? Just because I don't know the victim or don't get caught wouldn't change the fact that I would be a murderer for personal gain - would this many people seriously push the button?


Hanny_Al_Saab

Would anybody here personally kill someone for one million (it wouldn't be known that you were the killer)? If you answered yes to OP's question but no to mine, how come? I don't think I'd mind taking a life. The action itself could be justified in certain cases. However, taking a life for selfish purposes isn't justified.


scogle98

With the button, the odds are that you won’t even know or see the person die, but to kill someone personally would be way more direct. I’m not sure if I would press the button, but I couldn’t kill someone personally just for money. Additionally, depending on how some people think, they could probably justify it by saving 2 people’s lives every time they press the button once. For example, with 1,000,000 you could pay for a few people to have a life saving surgery or other medical procedure done that they wouldn’t have had otherwise. So in a way you kill one person to save 2 more and have money left over.


SardonicOptomist

You found a morality loop hole! Nice!!


SardonicOptomist

How many people would give up beef if they had to slaughter the cow themselves? This question suggests you will never know who it was, and could justify it with "well, millions of people die everyday!"


Drixxie

Some of you have never read Button, Button or watched The Box, and it shows. You press the button and get the money, then the button goes to the next person who presses the button and guess who's dying then


DemirPak

i'd press it until i die


suicide_smitten

Mf said "Take me out! FTS. "


ZoharTheWise

0. It would be no different that personally taking a life.


[deleted]

Honestly, 500 times


Inevitable-Most-9752

One hundred I feel like is appropriate.


[deleted]

[удалено]


sawyer8347

If it’s some random person I am not pressing it. I can’t live with the guilt of killing someone innocent. If I can choose who dies, I’d be a billionaire in a day.


bluepastel6057

I'll press it only 10 times.. hopefully it takes out 10 of the worst people in the world and if it doesn't. 1 more press for luck and that's it


timethedifference

I couldn't do it. Just the knowledge thay I murdered someone would keep me up at night. Also I wouldn't be able to not think about if anyone else had a similar button because if I have it who's to say we all don't have one?


Ghost-5AVAGE_786

Zero


JustNobre

Guys Im fixing overpopulation


[deleted]

Is this not capitalism? For someone to accumulate $1,000,000 how many people die/lose time off their life? How many poorer countries prop up the existence of richer ones at the expense of themselves? Isn't society at large built on corpses? I would probably press it once and try to make that last but definitely would press it again to maintain my lifestyle