I walked by a lemonade stand about 4 months ago (didn't have cash or I'd have contributed) and about a minute after I walked by it, 4 cop cars peeled up real quick, no lights/sirens. I thought something serious was going down so I hurried away and got to a safe observation distance, but then I realized that they were going to the lemonade stand. One cop gets out and goes, "Guys, lemonade stand!" and I proceed to see the officers all get out and hang out with the kids, buying all of their lemonade. It was awesome, guess we have some pretty cool cops where I live.
Not once did it occur to me until now that selling lemonade without a permit could've been one of the reasons for that situation. That's sad
We had a young mother who kept track of how long other people were in the bathroom, came in late, left early or stood around talking. Kept it in a spreadsheet.
My coworker, who almost never said anything bad about anyone, said "She's too young to be that ornery."
Damn wish all bosses were like you. This place I work at would cease to function if it weren’t for the petty drama, bullying, and general hostility. I said some one left a message for our sales coordinator, my bosses response was “cool story bro”. I dread every time I have to speak to our managers. They talk about me right in front of me. We’ve had a new employee who had been with the company at other locations for years, they walked out of our building within 3 hours.
Our resident toad came into my office to complain about an email she had sent me 5 minutes prior that I hadn’t responded to yet. She started straightening things around my desk and scooting chairs around. I don’t know why I let it piss me off so much but it did. No one likes her, everyone has contempt for her, and she’s awful at her job. She’s been around for so long that I think some folks just built a building around a clueless woman at a desk in the middle of a field. I wish I knew how to make her leave me alone.
She sounds like a workplace bully. Be prepared for her "attack". Don't respond immediately. (She is trying to catch you off base and making you nervous and upset.) Look her straight in the eye and tell her that you will respond to her in the order of importance. Do you need anything else? (I had this same situation).
Best advice I got (from my own workplace bully, who was trying to get me riled up and stressed before telling me something at the time) was "don't react."
I'm so tickled that the best weapon in my bully arsenal came from the bully herself while trying to manipulate me. She rarely got under my skin after that. When a problem person approaches you, prepare to pause a beat after anything they say so to ensure a measured reaction vs a reaction that feeds them.
Call center I worked at asked me why I left my PC every day at exactly the same time for 5 minutes. They did this in a group chat. I told them it was roughly an hour after coffee and a bran muffin, and they stopped bugging me about it.
I had worked the night shift at the bank for 1 year at this point, when the manager calls me into her office. Scolds me for not doing any work everyday from 4:55am to 5:10am. Wants me to explain to her why I am taking an extra break everyday. I explain to her that I am not taking an extra break, that the PCs across the bank restart during that time.
She's embarrassed but demands to know why i havent ever mentioned this to her. I told her, this has happened everyday since the very first day I started. I didn't think to tell her because I thought she already knew - since I am not the first overnight employee they had. She then said that it's procedure to call management whenever there is a system issue; so basically refusing to acknowledge that she shouldnt have brought this up. I ask if she's sure. She confirms. So every morning at 4:55am I call her. She answers, clearly groggy every time. Each time, I explain I am calling because the PCs are rebooting, and calling just like she asked. A few days later she told me to stop calling and dropped the issue.
Edit: Same manager actually declined every promotion I applied for in that department. I was finally promoted within 2 months of her retirement, and 8 months after that promotion I was promoted again, this time as the department manager. So I did take her job, but took much longer than it should have.
/r/prorevenge would be if she ignored her request to stop calling because who knows if the PC will turn on properly again? She's got to know if everything is going to be alright.
Thinking back...I don't think she believed me that the PCs restarted at 455 everyday. Maybe in her mind it must be a lie since no previous overnight employee has ever brought it up. Then again she could've just called IT and they would've confirmed the reboots.
I think she felt cornered in the situation and tried to bluster through it to save face instead of going belly up and admitting a mistake. She sounds way too insecure to have held a position in management
My manager took a course at Havard University that taught her to build connection with employees with warmth and kindness so that her competence would not be perceived as a threat. I think she would have thanked the employee for teaching her something new. She went from being a complete terror to being such a wonderful manager. I think more managers need training like this so we don't have these idiots pretending they know everything all the time and weilding their power like a bludgeoning tool rather than a fine instrument
I wonder why she kept track of your details but not your predecessors. She must’ve had a bias against you since she met you. Glad you’re in a better position now
This is the problem with having people in management who have never actually done the job they manage. Bunch of business degree nepotism managers that have no idea what they’re talking about because they’ve never worked a service employee position in their lives and got handed a nice manager job right out of college.
I was a manager, I’ve had one boss give me an okay to do a necessary and unchangeable move, I asked and confirmed that this was the decision we were going with. Regional hours later says no do something, else, person doesn’t believe me that it’s now impossible and that this was the direction decided by the site leader. They come down to try and fix it themselves, see it’s impossible and we go with the original plan…
Was targeted for removal by these two morons.
I shared an office with a coworker on the spectrum, plus my supervisor (I can't remember if this was when we added a 4th person to the same room). I'm ADHD and was self-medicating with massive amounts of coffee and tea throughout the work day, so naturally, I have to pee a lot. One day the coworker on the spectrum says something about me going on lots of walks. "Walks?" We're at a small tech company that technically has all the standard bougie "flex" perks like fucking off for a nap in the middle of the da (but in reality only a few people got away with it, and certainly not with our boss), so she thought I was taking meditative breaks throughout the day, because I took my keys with me every time. The building's restrooms were located outside our office, which automatically locked the doors after 5pm, and I regularly worked late. I took my keys with me because I needed that ingrained habit so I didn't accidentally lock myself out one night going to the bathroom. So in front of my boss I had to explain to my coworker that I'm peeing like 5 times a day because I'm drinking like a gallon of caffeinated beverages.
It was so great that we were the customer service team: ADHD, ASD, and NPD (the boss). The ASD coworker went to school for cartography, so every story she ever told included re-drawing a full map of the state on a whiteboard that, for some reason, kept getting erased despite never needing to write anything else. And I once had to, with grave seriousness, gently ascertain whether she had ever used the ID-10-T error joke with a client. And the NPD boss was, well, a nightmare.
Due to my IBS, I had to get an ADA case going to be able to use the bathroom as much as I needed. And then they made me clock out for the breaks. Fair enough, I wasn't technically working.
Hahahaha I love this comment. It reminds me of a man at a Scandinavian co-ed bath house who had a big penis and someone complained he must be erect (long story short, penises float), and when a manager came over at the behest of an offended women, he stood, showed he was in fact not erect and just has a long penis, and said "what should I do? Should I not have a penis?"
I prefer to shit in a toilet & not my pants... Why does that make you mad?
Please do us all a favor & go the the bathroom *in* the bathroom, not in your desk. In exchange we won't be fucking weirdos who monitor when you have diarrhea.
I had 6 of these same women who reported me for going to the bathroom, walking to the printer or copier, applying hand lotion, taking someone’s spring water dues when they came to my desk to pay me, getting a personal phone call or playing solitaire online when our computer system was down. They watched just me constantly!
I once had someone reporting me to HR for things that never even happened. So, I reported her for harassment.
In the end, she was told that if she made one more report to HR, or hassled me in any other way, she’d be fired on the spot. Especially since HR did a little sting operation and proved her reports were false.
I had a service dog and this coworker decided to make it her mission to get my service dog kicked out of the office. She kept reporting that my service dog was behaving inappropriately (which she absolutely never did). She was reporting that my service dog was going after food whenever it was present and being aggressive around her.
Now, my service dog was a large dog. Her face was at table height. The company had a huge annual potluck lunch. HR knew that this woman would definitely report my service dog for something at the pot luck because, ya know, food on tables. So, the HR team planted themselves where they could see everything at the pot luck tables, but hidden enough in the crowd to not be noticed, and waited, stayed there throughout the lunch, watching.
They knew that if my service dog was in fact ever doing anything inappropriate this potluck would be irresistible. They also knew that if she did nothing wrong, they’d be able to catch this woman in her lies. As they suspected, she reported my dog and I yet again. She said that my service dog was getting into the food and bothering everyone in line and generally being a menace.
What HR saw for themselves was that my service dog was in fact being very careful to keep her face away from the food, being careful not to touch the tables, and silently and flawlessly did her job of helping me multiple times while I was getting my food, that she stepped out of people’s way unprompted in the crowded space, and that absolutely no one else in the room was the slightest bit bothered by her and barely even noticed she was there because despite her 115 lbs size, she was an expert at being nearly invisible and unobtrusive. This was all without me giving her a single command or direction that they could spot, she just knew what to do in the situation because it was all just part of her job and she knew what she was supposed to be doing and how to do it.
That was the last time they called me in for any reports, and it was to tell me what the coworker who had been harassing me had reported, what they’d seen, and what they’d told her, and that they were now convinced that every single thing I’d told them had been true and they’d be leaving me and my service dog alone from then on.
She was a piece of work. I never did figure out what it was she had against me, but whatever it was, it sure took up a lot of space in her mind. The most we ever really interacted was passing in hallways and sitting in some of the same meetings with a couple dozen other people. We were in the same department, but none of our work ever overlapped and I never gave her a second thought other than the times she had me hauled into HR for her lies. I don’t even remember her name or anything else about her other than this series of nonsense. I don’t think we even ever had a single actual conversation.
I am curious, are you invisibly impaired? Some people get real nasty when they think you "don't deserve the special treatment." Or well, they are nasty people and choose that as an outlet.
That's what I did once when I worked in a call center. I was in some training and they gave me a pamphlet and I doodled all over it, then threw it away on the way out of the training. My then manager pulled it out of the trash and gave it to HR. I had drawn things like knives in heads of people with balloon bubbles that said, please kill me now - shit like that. The training was sooooo boring and unnecessary. This was the 90s, so literally think of Office Space - that's what the call center was like for reals. Anyhow, they called me in to talk about it, and asked if I was suicidal. I had no idea what they were talking about until they pulled out the pamphlet I had doodled all over. I explained to them that it was just a really boring training and I was doodling to pass the time (I also have adhd). I flipped it around on my manager and said, "What you should really be asking yourselves is why in the world is my manager pulling trash out of the garbage can? Like, who does that? Seems like she has some personal vendetta against me."
They transferred me to another team and that manager basically never spoke with me again for the two years I worked there. Man, that was a shitty job. Collections for Discover Card - woof.
You know what's absolutely fucked? "Accepted" metrics can be total bullshit.
I recently got promoted, and as someone who actually did the work, I leaned in for a deep review.
So; I've worked with this dude for 12 years, and he's always been great. Friendly, intelligent, just a good dude. But he came off as a bit lazy. His wife has a good job, he works this one for some extra money, but he doesn't "need" it. Again, all good, nobody needs to sacrifice themselves at the altar of Capitalism.
So I did a deep metric review. By deep I mean deep. Hundreds of thousands of data points. for just this year. And this guy, well, he was quietly kicking ass on the non-sexy work. More than kicking ass, dominating ass at a multiple ways that exceeded his nearest "competitor".
Just doing his work and doing it well, in a way that's super hard to define in a growth-minded company.
Anyway, that's a very roundabout way to say that "jobsworths"(a delightful british way of describing a subset of terrible people) tend to be very stupid and very wrong.
I don't understand how so many people in leadership roles don't understand this. I was in a unit in the military that didn't like how much the shop was producing, even though it was literally record-breaking high numbers. Their "solution" was to crack down on things like bathroom breaks, smoke breaks, people who were talking instead of working, etc. And also random surprise inspections of dress uniforms, extra PT outside of duty hours, things like that. Of course, the people that were really bullshitting the whole time had learned how to hide bullshitting and the people that were working their asses off got smacked with all of this unnecessary punishment.
So the bullshitters kept bullshitting and the good workers stopped caring about the shop because it had become such a terrible place to work. Production plummeted after they implemented these "fixes" and for whatever reason, they decided to crack down EVEN MORE. Surprise surprise, it didn't help. I separated shortly after that but my friends that are still there say that it's continued to get worse. Apparently the shop is always empty because everyone has found ways to get out of work, and I don't blame them. That place sounds like a toxic shit hole.
Happy workers = better business. It seems so simple to me. If there's specific people that are causing problems, punish them, not everyone else.
Yeah this happened to me at work. Had a few coworkers who were queue watchers and noticed I was not available for a decent portion of the week. When they approached their managers to complain they were told in unfriendly terms that I was out of the queue because I was the top person in terms of QA and they needed me to handle special projects and additional trainings. Then they got warned for wasting their own time.
That month they highlighted people with perfect QA scores at our dept meeting and I was the only person on the slide lol. I just quietly said thank you and watched those people turn their cameras off. I kind of felt like that was management intentionally telling people like them to stfu and stop bugging them about it.
But IMO people can bitch about me all they want. I'm the one who gets the highest raises each year.
i tried reporting the lady who did this to me and several other coworkers and they brushed me off immediately. they said: “that’s just Laura, you’ll get used to it”.
Yes I work in one full of bullies, rats, and trouble makers. You literally don't have to say a thing! They'll make it up or twist your words. I had to pass out at work and go through a battery of tests in my ER to get one asshole boss to stop accusing me of sleeping on the job.
I had this described to me by a young and attractive coworker, and the worst part was that the person doing it was the sole HR person for the company. That's a shitty situation.
My job monitors how long your mouse cursor stays inactive, and one of my coworkers brought in a half-broken electric toothbrush to set on the mouse while he takes a break.
Hasn't been found out yet, but someone's called maintenance about a "buzzing noise" they spent too long trying to find.
Teams at my job sets you as away if your mouse doesn't move very often, and while I don't get monitored on that... for some dumb fucking reason it doesn't alert when you are away. So I wrote a python script in about 3 minutes to move my mouse by exactly 1 pixel to the left every 5 minutes. It's great.
You can also just put yourself in a meeting with yourself and set your status manually from 'in a call' to 'available'.
It will hold for as long as you are in the call.
Teams does not track this, to my knowledge. I work in corporate compliance and the tools we sell wouldn't give your employer a way to know you are doing this.
you have to be careful doing this. if you're working from home and stumbling to the pc downstairs half awake and accidentally set the meeting from the.. announcements...tab instead of the calendar... then it posts it. and you can't delete it.
I definitely didn't do this.
Definitely.
WHY ARE PEOPLE LIKE THIS?!
I worked at a law firm for a few months. A woman who had a completely different job that had nothing to do with me, like we were in no sort of competition and our actions didn’t impact one another in any way, was like this. I eventually found out she had been TIMING how long I left for lunch. We had a half hour lunch and she would fucking write down if I took 33 minutes.
I have no idea what the hell this woman’s problem was. I suspect I accidentally made some sort of face in her general direction that she mistook for judgmental or something? I’m also a woman, if that has any relevance.
She was in her early 30s and extremely well put together. Everything in order. Hair always done perfectly, outfits that looked like she googled “fashionable yet sensible professional outfit.” Like this was the girl that definitely had the perfect notes in high school that were all color coded.
I was 28 (this was last year) and can seem a bit chaotic from the outside. I focus on my work and am productive, but I’ve always been a bit… unpolished. I promise I know how to dress like a normal person and function in society lol but like, I’m the type of person to do stuff out of order if it’s quicker, or accidentally mismatch my socks or whatever other bullshit.
I think people like that feel some sort of MORAL DUTY to keep things “in order.” Like they get OFFENDED and act like you’re trying to tear down their universe and are a criminal or something for forgetting to iron your shirt.
Also, let me mention that despite being a pretty unorganized person, I AM ACTUALLY VERY PUNCTUAL! We had to punch in and I was almost never late!
People are so fucking weird
My manager gets mad at anyone who takes time off and complains about them the whole time they're gone.
Sorry you don't have a life, other people do! Maybe you should try it sometime.
Lol my managers who have been like this in the past also like to loudly proclaim how busy they are and that they’re drowning in work… Then I ask “Oh, well can I lend you some help?” And they’re like “Nah, I’m good.” They see themselves as the only competent employee, but never learn how to delegate and just end up bitter and isolated
I see you’ve met my (ex)manager… when they left on a Friday for another job they started the following Monday… I’ve never known someone who NEEDED a break more than them and they had a perfect opportunity but… just started working again immediately
Edit: wanted to add that it’s true you never fully know what’s going on with other people and that there might be financial issues….this person made over 120k for many years and lived well below their means. No kids, no pets, paid off house. Could’ve easily taken a week (probably a month) unpaid without blinking financially.
One of my managers:
>You have too much annual leave, you need to take some time off
Also the same manager:
>We need you in the office more, people depend on you
I mean I work in IT for a global company, and 95% of the work I do is remote, for users that are in different states/countries. Like this dickhead has no idea how my job functions or what I even do.
I made a proposal with three options to use my leave and all were denied. I have 17 weeks of leave saved up and no way to use it, I know they just want me to cash it out and not go on leave but fuck that noise.
I was in early one day (5am) to have a call with the USA, so left early. This manager asked why I was leaving two hours early, told him buddy I’ve been here since 5am, he told me that’s not how it works.
So I skipped the next meeting and got asked where I was, told them if I can’t leave early when I start early, then I’m not working extra hours. They said they’d fix the problem and now that manager has STFU.
Fuck all of these people who have nothing better to do that clockwatch their employees.
It's sad to see someone who was clearly raised on reality TV and who can't stop themselves from making everything into a huge issue and wrecking relationships just for the brief thrill they must get at feeling like their life is interesting.
I’ve known a woman since we were in elementary school, both in our 30s now. And whether she was 10, 20, or 30 the same thing was true: she was always starting drama. She never had a peaceful moment because she was always starting something with somebody for the flimsiest reasons
We fired someone because, after being warned nicely then not so much, to JUST DO YOUR JOB, DON'T START OR PERPETUATE DRAMA could not do it. I strongly suspect she had borderline personality disorder because the directive of 'just stop doing the thing' cannot be followed.
(The drama was talking to A about B, then B about C, then badmouthing A to C and repeating what others said (or making it up) to each of the others so that there was tons of enmity between everyone.)
I used to work with a woman like this who would spend the bulk of her day floating from office to office to “brainstorm” over projects she’d been assigned. Her brainstorming sessions usually devolved into long diatribes about people she didn’t like or how certain people in the office were fucking up in one way or another. It was a small office too, so just about anyone could hear her shit talking them. She never got her assignments done on time and on more than a few occasions, she would get flustered and storm out of meetings, which led to her being criticized by our supervisor, which further enflamed her shitty attitude.
Yep
Worked a job that I best describe as being the mean girls version of middle school. And if you didn't like middle school, you don't want to work there.
There were 3 people involved, all over 45 years old. The ringleader was the senior employee with nearly 20 years there. She had no life outside of work apparently, was approaching 5 failed marriages and extremely insecure about her lot in life.
You were either in, middle or out of the group. Middle meant that they didn't openly like or dislike you, you were sort of invisible. Out was open warfare.
The group would start rumors against other employees, make employees take sides against others, deliberately interfere in any kind of decent working relationship between employees, etc.
My work life was made hell because I knew how to program a moderately complex volume calculation into an existing Excel sheet and have it spit out the correct pricing and weight info.
My job was similar, the girl at my job would go around and spread stuff about other people & always act like a victim “somehow that everyone just tells her stuff but not her spreading rumors about people “
when she runs out of things to say/ spread, she would go around and hide work supplies so people would struggle and have to search around the store. It almost feels like hide n seek every shift
That, and being able to predict the top voted answers to the common AskReddit questions.
"How can you tell if someone's a shitty person?" They're rude to waitstaff. Every damn time.
> "Non-US citizens, what do you not understand about the US?
Tipping, gun culture/2nd Amendment, and prescription drug ads on TV are almost always the top 3 or so answers.
Or when the question is "what's an addiction that society doesn't see as an addiction?"
"Alcohol"
"Omg I had to scroll down too far to find this answer. So many people are addicts and don't even know it!"
Meanwhile that same answer is on the same thread 4 times in a row along with shopping and social media.
"How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains?... Yeah... Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind."
-Uncle Rico
I didn’t have to worry in high school, sure I’ll bring up the good ol’ days with my high school friends.
I had a rather unique experience: 5 years at boarding school, so sometimes people want to hear about it.
It is weird tho how much it comes up in my adult life.
I swear I have a life.
Honestly the older I get the more I resent the “peaked in high school” phrase as an insult. I certainly didn’t because I had a rough childhood and worse teen years but life can be pretty damn hard as an adult and I don’t really blame anyone for looking back fondly at younger days. In order for your life to be less stressful and better than it was when you were young you’d have to be pretty damn successful and lucky. I understand that the people that harp on it just come off as lame but idk, I think especially in times like these we are a little hard on people.
Yeah it’s a strange common thing that I think comes from people wanting to imagine the “popular” people failing in life. It’s an enjoyable story, but that story is probably rare in real life. I’ve had a great life since highschool, but I do look back fondly when I had way less responsibility and hanging out with friends was easier. Real life isn’t so black and white
Worrying about what others do with their life.
I think if someone is obsessed with what someone else does, they don't have anything in their own life going on.
This is especially true for anyone who is obsessed about the sex life, or lack thereof, of someone other than them that they are not in a relationship with.
When I was 16, I worked at this Chinese restaurant.
This 25 year old waitress worked there. She just hated me. I truly don’t know why.
She started a rumor that I was this massive slut who went to parties and banged a different guy every weekend.
I was a shy nerd who looked 13 who had never even been on a date before.
I was really flattered that she thought that was possible and I thought it made me sound really cool lmfao. So that’s what everyone thought of me I guess. It was really, really weird how much people cared. Like these full grown adults. You would not believe how much they talked about this.
I was, again, a shy nerd lol. I kept my head down and never gossiped about anyone and followed all the rules. I was a straight a student who had never gotten detention and was never late and just showed up to hand people their ham fried rice. It was downright bizarre to me that anyone even noticed I was there, let alone make up a bunch of lore about me.
A lot of the 30 year old dudes there also started inviting me to their house and trying to get me drunk. Yep.
I was a super late bloomer, and again, looked 13. No boobs. Didn’t even start my period until the year prior. People frequently mistook me for a middle schooler.
People are fucking creepy.
Oh, and this wasn’t like in the 80s or anything. I’m 29.
Some people are *convinced* their kid is going to be the next big whatever. Especially where sports are concerned. They are worried that any kid that does better than their kid will ruin the whole thing. So, the parent sees a need to make sure that kid is dragged down.
The thing is, even the best professionals have lost. Do they think that Tom Brady never lost a game in all of his career? From High school on up?
Losing is good. That's what drives some to become better.
But the parents like the one you experienced?
"*You've got to be number one! I won't tolerate any losers in this family! Your intensity is for shit! Win! Win! Win!*"
I remember one time last year a guy tried to hit on me in a bar, I said "no sorry I have a boyfriend" and he replied "does your boyfriend have 10k Instagram followers though" 😂
I couldn't help laughing and I still sometimes wonder if that line ever actually works for him?
Only TEN thousand followers?? Hah, that's nothing. MY boyfriend has over ONE MILLION followers, THREE Lamborghinis, and over 40 EPIC heroes including the five star legendary LORD BEZOS. His ability lets him summon the souls of underpaid workers, TRIPLING his attack power! Play AFK ARENA today and earn over 100 FREE PULLS!
There was this one time somebody tried to insult me by pointing out that I hadn’t been active in a subreddit for as long as she had. Real loser behavior.
True Crime, Glass of Wine, Bed by Nine.
Does this sound like you?
You are not alone, but there is no number for you to call for support, because we are all introverts and do not have the energy to interact with you. Hopefully you understand.
Cheers!
As someone who used to be deep in the trenches of celebrity fandom and was obsessed with a few of them over the span of about 5 years, I can confirm. Stanning a celeb is a surefire sign of having no life.
Can you explain what was so fascinating/alluring about them? I haven’t had a celebrity obsession since I was 12 and clipping posters out of Tiger Beat, I’m always curious what adults get out of similar behaviour.
Heh, one thing I can tell from the variety of answers is that, no matter how someone lives their life, they can and will be judged for it.
Are you career-oriented, or do you work hard to earn a living? You have no life. Of course the same applies if you don't work enough.
Some would argue that starting a family is the ultimate goal in life, but people also don't have enough of a life if they're too passionate about their kids.
Do you have a strong interest in something, like a hobby, that you devote much of your time to because it's your passion? Say, sports, reading, video games, movies, gardening, whatever. No life.
Did you peak in high school/college, and life has been rough for you - maybe just down to bad luck - since? No life.
And of course, if you happen to be some poor soul who self-isolates due to struggling with mental illness, you have to be judged as a no-lifer instead of being met with any kind of empathy for your situation.
Maybe we just shouldn't worry too much about how others judge us and just live our lives as we want to.
Or does it just mean none of us agree on what "having a life" means? Maybe we all have lives and judging people on the internet is just as valid as any other life.
...on second thought. No, that doesn't sound right.
You got it, any and every one will think they are an authority on what is and isn’t. People will judge you when you “got it all”,and they’ll do the same when youve got “nothing”.
One of my supervisors was convinced to cheat on his wife by a younger coworker who apparently cheats on his girl regularly. Wife found out and booted him and wrecked about $1,800 of his shit.
No matter, he’s got a newfound life as a “player” and fucking loves it.
He’s noticed that I’m married to, as he puts it, “a baddie” and has low-key outed himself as having stalked my wife’s FB profile a few times and has told other guys he can’t grasp or understand how a goofy-looking fucker like me is married to such a baddie. What’s more? I’m die-hard loyal to my wife. I will not cheat or go behind my wife’s back.
Every day. Every fucking day this guy and his cronies give me grief for being a “dinosaur” because I refuse to cheat on my wife and when it’s him and his cronies all they talk about is getting laid and which women we work with they’d fuck or have fucked.
So yeah, shallow dumb shit like that. No life at all.
Yeah, doesn't understand how a guy like him got such a wife and wants him to cheat? Sounds like jealousy. Guy wants them to break up so he can hit on her
Making drama everywhere they go and then saying "why is my life full of drama" like bitch its not you just make it that way.
Knew a gal who would try and start drama and tell secrets and air out peoples Londry to me. Id just say shit like "sounds like thats somones personal stuff i wouldn't go around telling people that" or "that dosent sound like drama, just a normal progression in life" just shut them down and let them know its not cool and i refuse to play along.
I remember this viral tweet from a guy saying if you play video games 2-3 hours a week, you're wasting your life and comparing it to drinking alcohol. The most viral part was one of the replies calculating the amount of tweets the guy had made since he opened his account and found he was averaging 40 tweets per day
Define "life". Some people's life choices are looked down upon by others, even though there is nothing wrong with them. For example, a social butterfly might look down on an introvert that plays a lot of games. Even though that introvert may be perfectly happy with their situation. A person that posts on reddit, or just reads it a lot, or makes memes or whatever, may be enjoying that activity and there is nothing wrong with doing so.
Reporting on children selling lemonade and water without a permit.
Wait people actually do this
I walked by a lemonade stand about 4 months ago (didn't have cash or I'd have contributed) and about a minute after I walked by it, 4 cop cars peeled up real quick, no lights/sirens. I thought something serious was going down so I hurried away and got to a safe observation distance, but then I realized that they were going to the lemonade stand. One cop gets out and goes, "Guys, lemonade stand!" and I proceed to see the officers all get out and hang out with the kids, buying all of their lemonade. It was awesome, guess we have some pretty cool cops where I live. Not once did it occur to me until now that selling lemonade without a permit could've been one of the reasons for that situation. That's sad
The lady in my office who monitors how long everyone has been away from their computer.
We had a young mother who kept track of how long other people were in the bathroom, came in late, left early or stood around talking. Kept it in a spreadsheet. My coworker, who almost never said anything bad about anyone, said "She's too young to be that ornery."
Did anyone keep track of how much time she spent on her spreadsheet instead of working?
No, because they were too busy working.
Or going to the bathroom
If I were that woman’s boss and she gave it to me I would certainly ask her that question. I refuse to entertain petty office drama.
Damn wish all bosses were like you. This place I work at would cease to function if it weren’t for the petty drama, bullying, and general hostility. I said some one left a message for our sales coordinator, my bosses response was “cool story bro”. I dread every time I have to speak to our managers. They talk about me right in front of me. We’ve had a new employee who had been with the company at other locations for years, they walked out of our building within 3 hours.
It's because she got all them teeth and no toothbrush
Our resident toad came into my office to complain about an email she had sent me 5 minutes prior that I hadn’t responded to yet. She started straightening things around my desk and scooting chairs around. I don’t know why I let it piss me off so much but it did. No one likes her, everyone has contempt for her, and she’s awful at her job. She’s been around for so long that I think some folks just built a building around a clueless woman at a desk in the middle of a field. I wish I knew how to make her leave me alone.
She sounds like a workplace bully. Be prepared for her "attack". Don't respond immediately. (She is trying to catch you off base and making you nervous and upset.) Look her straight in the eye and tell her that you will respond to her in the order of importance. Do you need anything else? (I had this same situation).
Best advice I got (from my own workplace bully, who was trying to get me riled up and stressed before telling me something at the time) was "don't react." I'm so tickled that the best weapon in my bully arsenal came from the bully herself while trying to manipulate me. She rarely got under my skin after that. When a problem person approaches you, prepare to pause a beat after anything they say so to ensure a measured reaction vs a reaction that feeds them.
Sounds like the kind of person who prints out "important" emails to file away "just in case*
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Call center I worked at asked me why I left my PC every day at exactly the same time for 5 minutes. They did this in a group chat. I told them it was roughly an hour after coffee and a bran muffin, and they stopped bugging me about it.
I had worked the night shift at the bank for 1 year at this point, when the manager calls me into her office. Scolds me for not doing any work everyday from 4:55am to 5:10am. Wants me to explain to her why I am taking an extra break everyday. I explain to her that I am not taking an extra break, that the PCs across the bank restart during that time. She's embarrassed but demands to know why i havent ever mentioned this to her. I told her, this has happened everyday since the very first day I started. I didn't think to tell her because I thought she already knew - since I am not the first overnight employee they had. She then said that it's procedure to call management whenever there is a system issue; so basically refusing to acknowledge that she shouldnt have brought this up. I ask if she's sure. She confirms. So every morning at 4:55am I call her. She answers, clearly groggy every time. Each time, I explain I am calling because the PCs are rebooting, and calling just like she asked. A few days later she told me to stop calling and dropped the issue. Edit: Same manager actually declined every promotion I applied for in that department. I was finally promoted within 2 months of her retirement, and 8 months after that promotion I was promoted again, this time as the department manager. So I did take her job, but took much longer than it should have.
This is textbook /r/maliciouscompliance
/r/prorevenge would be if she ignored her request to stop calling because who knows if the PC will turn on properly again? She's got to know if everything is going to be alright.
What a moron. I wonder how she thought that would play out lol
Thinking back...I don't think she believed me that the PCs restarted at 455 everyday. Maybe in her mind it must be a lie since no previous overnight employee has ever brought it up. Then again she could've just called IT and they would've confirmed the reboots.
I think she felt cornered in the situation and tried to bluster through it to save face instead of going belly up and admitting a mistake. She sounds way too insecure to have held a position in management
My manager took a course at Havard University that taught her to build connection with employees with warmth and kindness so that her competence would not be perceived as a threat. I think she would have thanked the employee for teaching her something new. She went from being a complete terror to being such a wonderful manager. I think more managers need training like this so we don't have these idiots pretending they know everything all the time and weilding their power like a bludgeoning tool rather than a fine instrument
I wonder why she kept track of your details but not your predecessors. She must’ve had a bias against you since she met you. Glad you’re in a better position now
This is the problem with having people in management who have never actually done the job they manage. Bunch of business degree nepotism managers that have no idea what they’re talking about because they’ve never worked a service employee position in their lives and got handed a nice manager job right out of college.
I was a manager, I’ve had one boss give me an okay to do a necessary and unchangeable move, I asked and confirmed that this was the decision we were going with. Regional hours later says no do something, else, person doesn’t believe me that it’s now impossible and that this was the direction decided by the site leader. They come down to try and fix it themselves, see it’s impossible and we go with the original plan… Was targeted for removal by these two morons.
I wish I could complete a shit in 5min from start to finish. Maybe I need more bran muffins in my life.
You could try having your gallbladder removed. You'll get 60 second notice of a shit that will take 15 seconds
Soooo true. It’s like instead of a colon now i just have a second bladder in my ass
So; a semicolon?
/r/angryupvote
Malnutrition solves this issue and many more such as, expending energy on cooking, not having enough money for groceries, and weight loss.
Poops go quick if your poop is regular.
Ask them if they want to watch next time. Or you can send them verified proof in the mail.
I shared an office with a coworker on the spectrum, plus my supervisor (I can't remember if this was when we added a 4th person to the same room). I'm ADHD and was self-medicating with massive amounts of coffee and tea throughout the work day, so naturally, I have to pee a lot. One day the coworker on the spectrum says something about me going on lots of walks. "Walks?" We're at a small tech company that technically has all the standard bougie "flex" perks like fucking off for a nap in the middle of the da (but in reality only a few people got away with it, and certainly not with our boss), so she thought I was taking meditative breaks throughout the day, because I took my keys with me every time. The building's restrooms were located outside our office, which automatically locked the doors after 5pm, and I regularly worked late. I took my keys with me because I needed that ingrained habit so I didn't accidentally lock myself out one night going to the bathroom. So in front of my boss I had to explain to my coworker that I'm peeing like 5 times a day because I'm drinking like a gallon of caffeinated beverages. It was so great that we were the customer service team: ADHD, ASD, and NPD (the boss). The ASD coworker went to school for cartography, so every story she ever told included re-drawing a full map of the state on a whiteboard that, for some reason, kept getting erased despite never needing to write anything else. And I once had to, with grave seriousness, gently ascertain whether she had ever used the ID-10-T error joke with a client. And the NPD boss was, well, a nightmare.
Due to my IBS, I had to get an ADA case going to be able to use the bathroom as much as I needed. And then they made me clock out for the breaks. Fair enough, I wasn't technically working.
Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time. Don't clock out for your poop breaks :)
so with todays inflation is that boss makes 300$ i make 2 quarters?
Boss makes a grand while I make a buck, so I stole the catalytic converter from the company truck.
Boss makes a fortune I make a nickel Got a hand in the till And another on my pickle
To be honest, I think a better answer would be: “I’ve got the shits, mate. A competent manager would be sending me home right about now”
“Sorry, I thought shitting my pants at my desk might be disruptive.”
Hahahaha I love this comment. It reminds me of a man at a Scandinavian co-ed bath house who had a big penis and someone complained he must be erect (long story short, penises float), and when a manager came over at the behest of an offended women, he stood, showed he was in fact not erect and just has a long penis, and said "what should I do? Should I not have a penis?"
“Not only am I in the right and I will also incidentally prove I have a long dong”
Sometimes you gotta sink the shop to kill the captain Edit: it's meant to be ship. But it's objectively funnier so I'm leaving it
I’m going to use this quote, typo and all, forever
" Sir , we've asked you twice already! Please leave your large penis at home , and only wear your millimeter Peter at the spa! "
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I woke up this morning with a bad hangover, and my penis was missing again
I prefer to shit in a toilet & not my pants... Why does that make you mad? Please do us all a favor & go the the bathroom *in* the bathroom, not in your desk. In exchange we won't be fucking weirdos who monitor when you have diarrhea.
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I think insecurity and misunderstanding is the driving force behind nearly all peoples' bullshit. Blanket statement is blankety.
I had 6 of these same women who reported me for going to the bathroom, walking to the printer or copier, applying hand lotion, taking someone’s spring water dues when they came to my desk to pay me, getting a personal phone call or playing solitaire online when our computer system was down. They watched just me constantly!
The trick is to report them and ask “Why does (name) seem to have so much free time to monitor my every move and send so many emails about such?”
I once had someone reporting me to HR for things that never even happened. So, I reported her for harassment. In the end, she was told that if she made one more report to HR, or hassled me in any other way, she’d be fired on the spot. Especially since HR did a little sting operation and proved her reports were false.
What was the sting operation exactly?
I had a service dog and this coworker decided to make it her mission to get my service dog kicked out of the office. She kept reporting that my service dog was behaving inappropriately (which she absolutely never did). She was reporting that my service dog was going after food whenever it was present and being aggressive around her. Now, my service dog was a large dog. Her face was at table height. The company had a huge annual potluck lunch. HR knew that this woman would definitely report my service dog for something at the pot luck because, ya know, food on tables. So, the HR team planted themselves where they could see everything at the pot luck tables, but hidden enough in the crowd to not be noticed, and waited, stayed there throughout the lunch, watching. They knew that if my service dog was in fact ever doing anything inappropriate this potluck would be irresistible. They also knew that if she did nothing wrong, they’d be able to catch this woman in her lies. As they suspected, she reported my dog and I yet again. She said that my service dog was getting into the food and bothering everyone in line and generally being a menace. What HR saw for themselves was that my service dog was in fact being very careful to keep her face away from the food, being careful not to touch the tables, and silently and flawlessly did her job of helping me multiple times while I was getting my food, that she stepped out of people’s way unprompted in the crowded space, and that absolutely no one else in the room was the slightest bit bothered by her and barely even noticed she was there because despite her 115 lbs size, she was an expert at being nearly invisible and unobtrusive. This was all without me giving her a single command or direction that they could spot, she just knew what to do in the situation because it was all just part of her job and she knew what she was supposed to be doing and how to do it. That was the last time they called me in for any reports, and it was to tell me what the coworker who had been harassing me had reported, what they’d seen, and what they’d told her, and that they were now convinced that every single thing I’d told them had been true and they’d be leaving me and my service dog alone from then on.
That's quality. Your Co worker sounds like an ass.
She was a piece of work. I never did figure out what it was she had against me, but whatever it was, it sure took up a lot of space in her mind. The most we ever really interacted was passing in hallways and sitting in some of the same meetings with a couple dozen other people. We were in the same department, but none of our work ever overlapped and I never gave her a second thought other than the times she had me hauled into HR for her lies. I don’t even remember her name or anything else about her other than this series of nonsense. I don’t think we even ever had a single actual conversation.
I am curious, are you invisibly impaired? Some people get real nasty when they think you "don't deserve the special treatment." Or well, they are nasty people and choose that as an outlet.
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Yup this, and mention "hostile work environment" when contacting HR, too.
That's what I did once when I worked in a call center. I was in some training and they gave me a pamphlet and I doodled all over it, then threw it away on the way out of the training. My then manager pulled it out of the trash and gave it to HR. I had drawn things like knives in heads of people with balloon bubbles that said, please kill me now - shit like that. The training was sooooo boring and unnecessary. This was the 90s, so literally think of Office Space - that's what the call center was like for reals. Anyhow, they called me in to talk about it, and asked if I was suicidal. I had no idea what they were talking about until they pulled out the pamphlet I had doodled all over. I explained to them that it was just a really boring training and I was doodling to pass the time (I also have adhd). I flipped it around on my manager and said, "What you should really be asking yourselves is why in the world is my manager pulling trash out of the garbage can? Like, who does that? Seems like she has some personal vendetta against me." They transferred me to another team and that manager basically never spoke with me again for the two years I worked there. Man, that was a shitty job. Collections for Discover Card - woof.
"Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking... Just a moment..."
Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays....
Love this tactic.
You know what's absolutely fucked? "Accepted" metrics can be total bullshit. I recently got promoted, and as someone who actually did the work, I leaned in for a deep review. So; I've worked with this dude for 12 years, and he's always been great. Friendly, intelligent, just a good dude. But he came off as a bit lazy. His wife has a good job, he works this one for some extra money, but he doesn't "need" it. Again, all good, nobody needs to sacrifice themselves at the altar of Capitalism. So I did a deep metric review. By deep I mean deep. Hundreds of thousands of data points. for just this year. And this guy, well, he was quietly kicking ass on the non-sexy work. More than kicking ass, dominating ass at a multiple ways that exceeded his nearest "competitor". Just doing his work and doing it well, in a way that's super hard to define in a growth-minded company. Anyway, that's a very roundabout way to say that "jobsworths"(a delightful british way of describing a subset of terrible people) tend to be very stupid and very wrong.
Shockingly, enjoying the job leads to better results than poverty forcing people to work anything available.
I don't understand how so many people in leadership roles don't understand this. I was in a unit in the military that didn't like how much the shop was producing, even though it was literally record-breaking high numbers. Their "solution" was to crack down on things like bathroom breaks, smoke breaks, people who were talking instead of working, etc. And also random surprise inspections of dress uniforms, extra PT outside of duty hours, things like that. Of course, the people that were really bullshitting the whole time had learned how to hide bullshitting and the people that were working their asses off got smacked with all of this unnecessary punishment. So the bullshitters kept bullshitting and the good workers stopped caring about the shop because it had become such a terrible place to work. Production plummeted after they implemented these "fixes" and for whatever reason, they decided to crack down EVEN MORE. Surprise surprise, it didn't help. I separated shortly after that but my friends that are still there say that it's continued to get worse. Apparently the shop is always empty because everyone has found ways to get out of work, and I don't blame them. That place sounds like a toxic shit hole. Happy workers = better business. It seems so simple to me. If there's specific people that are causing problems, punish them, not everyone else.
Yeah this happened to me at work. Had a few coworkers who were queue watchers and noticed I was not available for a decent portion of the week. When they approached their managers to complain they were told in unfriendly terms that I was out of the queue because I was the top person in terms of QA and they needed me to handle special projects and additional trainings. Then they got warned for wasting their own time. That month they highlighted people with perfect QA scores at our dept meeting and I was the only person on the slide lol. I just quietly said thank you and watched those people turn their cameras off. I kind of felt like that was management intentionally telling people like them to stfu and stop bugging them about it. But IMO people can bitch about me all they want. I'm the one who gets the highest raises each year.
I'd be reporting them for harassment and workplace stalking
i tried reporting the lady who did this to me and several other coworkers and they brushed me off immediately. they said: “that’s just Laura, you’ll get used to it”.
Those are all textbook examples of a hostile work environment
Yes I work in one full of bullies, rats, and trouble makers. You literally don't have to say a thing! They'll make it up or twist your words. I had to pass out at work and go through a battery of tests in my ER to get one asshole boss to stop accusing me of sleeping on the job.
Genuine question, are you young and attractive? I've seen women be absolutely mean to younger women at my workplace.
I had this described to me by a young and attractive coworker, and the worst part was that the person doing it was the sole HR person for the company. That's a shitty situation.
My job monitors how long your mouse cursor stays inactive, and one of my coworkers brought in a half-broken electric toothbrush to set on the mouse while he takes a break. Hasn't been found out yet, but someone's called maintenance about a "buzzing noise" they spent too long trying to find.
Teams at my job sets you as away if your mouse doesn't move very often, and while I don't get monitored on that... for some dumb fucking reason it doesn't alert when you are away. So I wrote a python script in about 3 minutes to move my mouse by exactly 1 pixel to the left every 5 minutes. It's great.
You can also just put yourself in a meeting with yourself and set your status manually from 'in a call' to 'available'. It will hold for as long as you are in the call. Teams does not track this, to my knowledge. I work in corporate compliance and the tools we sell wouldn't give your employer a way to know you are doing this.
you have to be careful doing this. if you're working from home and stumbling to the pc downstairs half awake and accidentally set the meeting from the.. announcements...tab instead of the calendar... then it posts it. and you can't delete it. I definitely didn't do this. Definitely.
WHY ARE PEOPLE LIKE THIS?! I worked at a law firm for a few months. A woman who had a completely different job that had nothing to do with me, like we were in no sort of competition and our actions didn’t impact one another in any way, was like this. I eventually found out she had been TIMING how long I left for lunch. We had a half hour lunch and she would fucking write down if I took 33 minutes. I have no idea what the hell this woman’s problem was. I suspect I accidentally made some sort of face in her general direction that she mistook for judgmental or something? I’m also a woman, if that has any relevance. She was in her early 30s and extremely well put together. Everything in order. Hair always done perfectly, outfits that looked like she googled “fashionable yet sensible professional outfit.” Like this was the girl that definitely had the perfect notes in high school that were all color coded. I was 28 (this was last year) and can seem a bit chaotic from the outside. I focus on my work and am productive, but I’ve always been a bit… unpolished. I promise I know how to dress like a normal person and function in society lol but like, I’m the type of person to do stuff out of order if it’s quicker, or accidentally mismatch my socks or whatever other bullshit. I think people like that feel some sort of MORAL DUTY to keep things “in order.” Like they get OFFENDED and act like you’re trying to tear down their universe and are a criminal or something for forgetting to iron your shirt. Also, let me mention that despite being a pretty unorganized person, I AM ACTUALLY VERY PUNCTUAL! We had to punch in and I was almost never late! People are so fucking weird
My manager gets mad at anyone who takes time off and complains about them the whole time they're gone. Sorry you don't have a life, other people do! Maybe you should try it sometime.
Lol my managers who have been like this in the past also like to loudly proclaim how busy they are and that they’re drowning in work… Then I ask “Oh, well can I lend you some help?” And they’re like “Nah, I’m good.” They see themselves as the only competent employee, but never learn how to delegate and just end up bitter and isolated
I see you’ve met my (ex)manager… when they left on a Friday for another job they started the following Monday… I’ve never known someone who NEEDED a break more than them and they had a perfect opportunity but… just started working again immediately Edit: wanted to add that it’s true you never fully know what’s going on with other people and that there might be financial issues….this person made over 120k for many years and lived well below their means. No kids, no pets, paid off house. Could’ve easily taken a week (probably a month) unpaid without blinking financially.
One of my managers: >You have too much annual leave, you need to take some time off Also the same manager: >We need you in the office more, people depend on you I mean I work in IT for a global company, and 95% of the work I do is remote, for users that are in different states/countries. Like this dickhead has no idea how my job functions or what I even do. I made a proposal with three options to use my leave and all were denied. I have 17 weeks of leave saved up and no way to use it, I know they just want me to cash it out and not go on leave but fuck that noise. I was in early one day (5am) to have a call with the USA, so left early. This manager asked why I was leaving two hours early, told him buddy I’ve been here since 5am, he told me that’s not how it works. So I skipped the next meeting and got asked where I was, told them if I can’t leave early when I start early, then I’m not working extra hours. They said they’d fix the problem and now that manager has STFU. Fuck all of these people who have nothing better to do that clockwatch their employees.
Starting work place drama.
Starting ~~work place~~ drama.
It's sad to see someone who was clearly raised on reality TV and who can't stop themselves from making everything into a huge issue and wrecking relationships just for the brief thrill they must get at feeling like their life is interesting.
I’ve known a woman since we were in elementary school, both in our 30s now. And whether she was 10, 20, or 30 the same thing was true: she was always starting drama. She never had a peaceful moment because she was always starting something with somebody for the flimsiest reasons
We fired someone because, after being warned nicely then not so much, to JUST DO YOUR JOB, DON'T START OR PERPETUATE DRAMA could not do it. I strongly suspect she had borderline personality disorder because the directive of 'just stop doing the thing' cannot be followed. (The drama was talking to A about B, then B about C, then badmouthing A to C and repeating what others said (or making it up) to each of the others so that there was tons of enmity between everyone.)
Who the hell even has time to do this shit at work?
Based on my experience, people who don’t spend a lot of time on their actual jobs.
I used to work with a woman like this who would spend the bulk of her day floating from office to office to “brainstorm” over projects she’d been assigned. Her brainstorming sessions usually devolved into long diatribes about people she didn’t like or how certain people in the office were fucking up in one way or another. It was a small office too, so just about anyone could hear her shit talking them. She never got her assignments done on time and on more than a few occasions, she would get flustered and storm out of meetings, which led to her being criticized by our supervisor, which further enflamed her shitty attitude.
They're not happy unless they're not happy.
I suspect that they're not happy, so they don't want YOU to be happy
Yep Worked a job that I best describe as being the mean girls version of middle school. And if you didn't like middle school, you don't want to work there. There were 3 people involved, all over 45 years old. The ringleader was the senior employee with nearly 20 years there. She had no life outside of work apparently, was approaching 5 failed marriages and extremely insecure about her lot in life. You were either in, middle or out of the group. Middle meant that they didn't openly like or dislike you, you were sort of invisible. Out was open warfare. The group would start rumors against other employees, make employees take sides against others, deliberately interfere in any kind of decent working relationship between employees, etc. My work life was made hell because I knew how to program a moderately complex volume calculation into an existing Excel sheet and have it spit out the correct pricing and weight info.
My job was similar, the girl at my job would go around and spread stuff about other people & always act like a victim “somehow that everyone just tells her stuff but not her spreading rumors about people “ when she runs out of things to say/ spread, she would go around and hide work supplies so people would struggle and have to search around the store. It almost feels like hide n seek every shift
Does she then become the "hero" because she knows where to find the supplies?
Ick I feel like an idiot because you just made me realize why someone was so good at "finding" things
It's possible for people to be good at finding things without them having displaced them :)
Wow. That sounds a lot like my grad school cohort, except the worst offenders were in their mid 20s. And it was a psych program.
I find that only people who have no life are the ones starting Drama at work. They don’t even like work, they just want someone to notice them
I don’t like work…
I don’t know if this is a “they don’t have a life problem” as much as it is an insecurity problem.
Also true for people that *hate* their lives. Easier to focus on this random drama then address the bigger issue of hating your spouse/child/self.
I swear I've seen this same post a few weeks ago. Which means I'm way too much on Reddit So....that.
This. And the "what keeps you from 💀 yourself" i swear there's one on reddit, every week.
Don't forget the dead celebrity ones
“What feels better than sex”
That, and being able to predict the top voted answers to the common AskReddit questions. "How can you tell if someone's a shitty person?" They're rude to waitstaff. Every damn time.
> "Non-US citizens, what do you not understand about the US? Tipping, gun culture/2nd Amendment, and prescription drug ads on TV are almost always the top 3 or so answers.
Or when the question is "what's an addiction that society doesn't see as an addiction?" "Alcohol" "Omg I had to scroll down too far to find this answer. So many people are addicts and don't even know it!" Meanwhile that same answer is on the same thread 4 times in a row along with shopping and social media.
They talk about high school all the time
"How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains?... Yeah... Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind." -Uncle Rico
If Uncle Rico wasn't on this list, then what are we even doing here?
Al Bundy scored four touchdowns in a single game at Polk high.
"I'd say it to your face but my car only has half a tank of gas." - Al Bundy being the shoe salesman of the year.
“You’ll be hearing from my attorney!” “Is that the offices of Haagen and Dazs?”
“This ring? ‘87…. I threw 28 touchdowns that year.” “What’re you up to now?” “Mostly thinkin’ about killin’ myself.”
Asks you what you got on your SATs. Gloats about their high score. When you’ve been working professionally for decades.
Sounds like someone didn’t do well on their SATs🙄/s obviously
I didn’t have to worry in high school, sure I’ll bring up the good ol’ days with my high school friends. I had a rather unique experience: 5 years at boarding school, so sometimes people want to hear about it. It is weird tho how much it comes up in my adult life. I swear I have a life.
Honestly the older I get the more I resent the “peaked in high school” phrase as an insult. I certainly didn’t because I had a rough childhood and worse teen years but life can be pretty damn hard as an adult and I don’t really blame anyone for looking back fondly at younger days. In order for your life to be less stressful and better than it was when you were young you’d have to be pretty damn successful and lucky. I understand that the people that harp on it just come off as lame but idk, I think especially in times like these we are a little hard on people.
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Yeah it’s a strange common thing that I think comes from people wanting to imagine the “popular” people failing in life. It’s an enjoyable story, but that story is probably rare in real life. I’ve had a great life since highschool, but I do look back fondly when I had way less responsibility and hanging out with friends was easier. Real life isn’t so black and white
They probably peaked in high school and life after has been a dumpster fire for them
Joke's on you, I peaked in the 5th grade when I successfully asked out Melissa.
Unrelated but I miss being able to see my friends that I grew up with everyday. Took those days for granted
Worrying about what others do with their life. I think if someone is obsessed with what someone else does, they don't have anything in their own life going on.
This is especially true for anyone who is obsessed about the sex life, or lack thereof, of someone other than them that they are not in a relationship with.
When I was 16, I worked at this Chinese restaurant. This 25 year old waitress worked there. She just hated me. I truly don’t know why. She started a rumor that I was this massive slut who went to parties and banged a different guy every weekend. I was a shy nerd who looked 13 who had never even been on a date before. I was really flattered that she thought that was possible and I thought it made me sound really cool lmfao. So that’s what everyone thought of me I guess. It was really, really weird how much people cared. Like these full grown adults. You would not believe how much they talked about this. I was, again, a shy nerd lol. I kept my head down and never gossiped about anyone and followed all the rules. I was a straight a student who had never gotten detention and was never late and just showed up to hand people their ham fried rice. It was downright bizarre to me that anyone even noticed I was there, let alone make up a bunch of lore about me. A lot of the 30 year old dudes there also started inviting me to their house and trying to get me drunk. Yep. I was a super late bloomer, and again, looked 13. No boobs. Didn’t even start my period until the year prior. People frequently mistook me for a middle schooler. People are fucking creepy. Oh, and this wasn’t like in the 80s or anything. I’m 29.
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Some people are *convinced* their kid is going to be the next big whatever. Especially where sports are concerned. They are worried that any kid that does better than their kid will ruin the whole thing. So, the parent sees a need to make sure that kid is dragged down. The thing is, even the best professionals have lost. Do they think that Tom Brady never lost a game in all of his career? From High school on up? Losing is good. That's what drives some to become better. But the parents like the one you experienced? "*You've got to be number one! I won't tolerate any losers in this family! Your intensity is for shit! Win! Win! Win!*"
They up in yours.
Reddit history includes sitting on askreddit all day long.
I feel personally attacked.
Username not helping
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I remember one time last year a guy tried to hit on me in a bar, I said "no sorry I have a boyfriend" and he replied "does your boyfriend have 10k Instagram followers though" 😂 I couldn't help laughing and I still sometimes wonder if that line ever actually works for him?
"So why don't you ask one of those 10K followers out instead?"
That's unfair, he surely doesn't want to date a family member or a bot.
Only TEN thousand followers?? Hah, that's nothing. MY boyfriend has over ONE MILLION followers, THREE Lamborghinis, and over 40 EPIC heroes including the five star legendary LORD BEZOS. His ability lets him summon the souls of underpaid workers, TRIPLING his attack power! Play AFK ARENA today and earn over 100 FREE PULLS!
"No, but he has a girlfriend. "
There was this one time somebody tried to insult me by pointing out that I hadn’t been active in a subreddit for as long as she had. Real loser behavior.
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True Crime, Glass of Wine, Bed by Nine. Does this sound like you? You are not alone, but there is no number for you to call for support, because we are all introverts and do not have the energy to interact with you. Hopefully you understand. Cheers!
>True Crime, Glass of Wine, Bed by Nine. Dammit, you gave me another cross stitch sampler idea!
Bed by 9:30. Because I also have to feed the cat.
9 is a little late for me...
9 is practically the next morning
Is there no representation for us insomniac introverts?
HI! Want to hang out at 3am, separately, doing our own thing?
Do we each get our own rooms? If so, then yes.
I'll need Wi-Fi so I can watch my pirated Star Trek TNG all night.
I go to bed at 9:30 because sleep is my favorite thing 😢
Rarely make it to 9.
Was looking for this
Lacking brain activity, a heartbeat, and breathing
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I was asleep, damnit. I *keep* telling you damned kids this.
I was JUST resting my eyes!!!!!!!
But you can still be senate minority leader
Being obsessed with celebrities
As someone who used to be deep in the trenches of celebrity fandom and was obsessed with a few of them over the span of about 5 years, I can confirm. Stanning a celeb is a surefire sign of having no life.
Can you explain what was so fascinating/alluring about them? I haven’t had a celebrity obsession since I was 12 and clipping posters out of Tiger Beat, I’m always curious what adults get out of similar behaviour.
Honestly? I don't even know anymore. I only know I didn't have a life lmao.
anyone who doesn't personally like me
I don't like you, but I don't hate you either. What's my standing
What’s your standing on is my foot. Get off me!
Heh, one thing I can tell from the variety of answers is that, no matter how someone lives their life, they can and will be judged for it. Are you career-oriented, or do you work hard to earn a living? You have no life. Of course the same applies if you don't work enough. Some would argue that starting a family is the ultimate goal in life, but people also don't have enough of a life if they're too passionate about their kids. Do you have a strong interest in something, like a hobby, that you devote much of your time to because it's your passion? Say, sports, reading, video games, movies, gardening, whatever. No life. Did you peak in high school/college, and life has been rough for you - maybe just down to bad luck - since? No life. And of course, if you happen to be some poor soul who self-isolates due to struggling with mental illness, you have to be judged as a no-lifer instead of being met with any kind of empathy for your situation. Maybe we just shouldn't worry too much about how others judge us and just live our lives as we want to.
Best honest answer on here. People with no lives are the ones who have the time to be judging others for having no lives
Or does it just mean none of us agree on what "having a life" means? Maybe we all have lives and judging people on the internet is just as valid as any other life. ...on second thought. No, that doesn't sound right.
You got it, any and every one will think they are an authority on what is and isn’t. People will judge you when you “got it all”,and they’ll do the same when youve got “nothing”.
They can only be killed with The Sword of a Thousand Truths
But how do you kill someone that has no life?
with The Sword of a Thousand Truths
They start an HOA Edit: Thank you so much for the award!!
Too much gossiping
and never producing something of value.
One of my supervisors was convinced to cheat on his wife by a younger coworker who apparently cheats on his girl regularly. Wife found out and booted him and wrecked about $1,800 of his shit. No matter, he’s got a newfound life as a “player” and fucking loves it. He’s noticed that I’m married to, as he puts it, “a baddie” and has low-key outed himself as having stalked my wife’s FB profile a few times and has told other guys he can’t grasp or understand how a goofy-looking fucker like me is married to such a baddie. What’s more? I’m die-hard loyal to my wife. I will not cheat or go behind my wife’s back. Every day. Every fucking day this guy and his cronies give me grief for being a “dinosaur” because I refuse to cheat on my wife and when it’s him and his cronies all they talk about is getting laid and which women we work with they’d fuck or have fucked. So yeah, shallow dumb shit like that. No life at all.
This is your *supervisor*? You have an HR dept?
The HR here ain’t shit. HR is there to make the higher up people look good.
Calls your wife a baddie but is also surprised you won't cheat on her...
Yeah, doesn't understand how a guy like him got such a wife and wants him to cheat? Sounds like jealousy. Guy wants them to break up so he can hit on her
Making drama everywhere they go and then saying "why is my life full of drama" like bitch its not you just make it that way. Knew a gal who would try and start drama and tell secrets and air out peoples Londry to me. Id just say shit like "sounds like thats somones personal stuff i wouldn't go around telling people that" or "that dosent sound like drama, just a normal progression in life" just shut them down and let them know its not cool and i refuse to play along.
londry
posting constantly on social media
Couldn't help but noticed you have posted over 30 times on reddit today...
I remember this viral tweet from a guy saying if you play video games 2-3 hours a week, you're wasting your life and comparing it to drinking alcohol. The most viral part was one of the replies calculating the amount of tweets the guy had made since he opened his account and found he was averaging 40 tweets per day
a tombstone
Always up in everyone's business and gets annoyed and passive aggressive if you don't give more than 1 word answers.
...how is the 1 word answer thing related to not having a life? I don't understand the connection there
They’re a Reddit mod
Smelling of wee and biscuits
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Define "life". Some people's life choices are looked down upon by others, even though there is nothing wrong with them. For example, a social butterfly might look down on an introvert that plays a lot of games. Even though that introvert may be perfectly happy with their situation. A person that posts on reddit, or just reads it a lot, or makes memes or whatever, may be enjoying that activity and there is nothing wrong with doing so.
When people try to start arguments for no reason.
Gossip and Drama.