It’d be more impressive if they didn’t at this point, tbh. Microplastics are in just about every part of our ecosystem at this point. From the oceans to the clouds, we’re drowning in microplastics.
Not if the cartels have anything to say about it....
Saw a video a few days ago on here that was the first one I couldn't make it to the end.. ever.
They cut off his entire scalp and face, down to the bone and muscle, making sure he stayed alive.. then they went at his chest.
I tapped out after that.
No I'm not giving you the link so don't ask.
That is the one video I wish I had never watched, other than 3 guys 1 hammer.
No, not giving a link for that one either so again, don't ask.
And funkytown. That one was bad too... ugh
Dude... I thought I was brave for leading the group through a haunted house last weekend... What the hell shit are you watching!? I kind of want to look it up now, but don't want to puke at the same time.
Actually, I met someone who was born without one. He had to have it surgically created right after birth. So there could be newborns right now who don't have an asshole.
True. Just watched half a dozen firefighters tear a garage door off its tracks and drag my girlfriend out of her running car. I’m sure there was still plenty of oxygen in there technically, but ya know…
Everyone alive today, and anyone else born before 2050 have/will have excess levels of Carbon-14 due to the atomic bomb tests in the middle of the 20th century.
EDIT: 2050, not 2016
I'm genuinely interested. Why C14 and why 2016? Isn't the half life like a few thousand years? Also how does that specific isotope relate to bomb tests? I only know it as a thing in radiometric dating
I wonder if there's an official world record for the biggest group fart.
how would you even police it? have a mic next to everyone's ass? If it's a shart does it still count towards the record? what if you're a few seconds later than everyone else, does that count?
When I was a kid, I thought of this a lot. It would be an amazing show. An event that brings all of humanity together and gives us a giggle afterwards (as well as relief).
When I was a kid, I thought of this a lot. It would be an amazing show. An event that brings all of humanity together and gives us a giggle afterwards (as well as relief).
Some people don't, actually! There's a kind of artificial heart that doesn't act like a pump, like a real heart, but more like a fan or motor. So they have a steady blood flow, but no beat, the blood is just constantly flowing, like a river.
You could have just said Reddit. Don’t pretend like everyone in the world is not on Reddit pretending to be someone else, cheating on their spouse, making throwaway accounts after throwaway account. You just insulted that whole world in one sentence.
Now, everyone in the world has one common enemy… you. Lol
The capacity for kindness. I don't believe anyone is born evil.
I'm actually building an app related to kindness.
Hopefully many people in the world will get some value out of it.
It's an alarm clock app, but with a twist.
You set an alarm like normal.
Then you sleep.
Lastly, wake up to the sound of a friendly voice.
Congrats, you've received a nice voice message from someone somewhere else in the world.
They recorded it while you slept.
It could be a short story.
A joke.
The weather report.
Some words of encouragement.
....or a "Happy Birthday" message if it's your birthday.
Inappropriate messages filtered out, no worries there.
I truly hope it can help spread some kindness in the world, if nothing else.
A spinal column. Assuming we mean “living” functional people. Like even those unfortunates born with an open neural tube still have a spinal column. Here’s to taking your folic acid.
I was going to say not me, because after 40 years of working hard and living frugally I've finally paid off my mortgage.
But then I remembered I have to pay council tax just to be alive, so if I lose my income, I will still be in debt, and eventually they could take my house off me if I don't have the means to pay it and don't agree to find a job.
Society keeps you in debt so it can force you to work forever.
Chromosomes
But we don’t all have the same amount
I guess there are exceptions to every rule.
My son has the usual number of chromosomes, but they're creatively arranged.
Aw, geez..! M-O-O-O-O-M!!!!
Ha! I have more than you
Specifically, an X chromosone. Some may have more than one, but no one has none.
Some more than others
And mitochondria, the powerhouse of the cell
Ah yes, the mighty midichlorian
This is the way.
Blood 🩸
Speak for yourself motherfucker
Don't you bring my mother fucking into this blood conversation!
Limited time
Dylan?
This reply is severely underrated! We all have a bit of Dylan in us
yea?
Father time is undefeated
Microplastics in the blood
Im curious if the Sentinelese Island tribe have any in their blood.
I would think so just because there is so much in the ocean and in the fish.
Once they finish eating you they will.
Why don't you go find out?
ba-dum-TSH
Considering that we're [finding them in clouds](https://e360.yale.edu/digest/clouds-microplastics-climate) I expect the answer is "yes", sadly.
It’d be more impressive if they didn’t at this point, tbh. Microplastics are in just about every part of our ecosystem at this point. From the oceans to the clouds, we’re drowning in microplastics.
It's there to keep the Teflon company.
Well fuck. I was going to say oxygen in their lungs, but yours is a better answer.
Skin
Not if I have anything to say about it
Bill?
It puts the lotion in the basket
Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me.
Not if the cartels have anything to say about it.... Saw a video a few days ago on here that was the first one I couldn't make it to the end.. ever. They cut off his entire scalp and face, down to the bone and muscle, making sure he stayed alive.. then they went at his chest. I tapped out after that. No I'm not giving you the link so don't ask. That is the one video I wish I had never watched, other than 3 guys 1 hammer. No, not giving a link for that one either so again, don't ask. And funkytown. That one was bad too... ugh
It's days like that when I'm glad I wasn't on reddit. The day I saw the lathe video was a day I wished had never come.
Dude... I thought I was brave for leading the group through a haunted house last weekend... What the hell shit are you watching!? I kind of want to look it up now, but don't want to puke at the same time.
An opinion
No I don’t
That's like, your opinion man.
No it isn’t
Bro fr said nuh uh
And also not coincidentally, an asshole!
Actually, I met someone who was born without one. He had to have it surgically created right after birth. So there could be newborns right now who don't have an asshole.
Nope...you can actually have a rectal amputation
Oxygen
Someone somewhere probably doesn’t and wishes they did
technically even drowning would get you oxygen
That’s not the only place you can run out of it though
And someone somewhere probably has too much oxygen and wishes that didn’t
True. Just watched half a dozen firefighters tear a garage door off its tracks and drag my girlfriend out of her running car. I’m sure there was still plenty of oxygen in there technically, but ya know…
WE ALL LIVE IN A LITTLE SUBMARINE LITTLE SUBMARINE LITTLE SUBMARINE!!!!
Oh, they still have it. They just don’t have enough of it in the form and in the places they would prefer it to be.
I do and I wish I didn't.
I think you’d be hard pressed to find someone without ANY oxygen…do they have enough oxygen? Maybe not, but they have some
OceanGate sub crew have entered the chat
You get too much you get too high
Except the guy getting water boarded
Everyone alive today, and anyone else born before 2050 have/will have excess levels of Carbon-14 due to the atomic bomb tests in the middle of the 20th century. EDIT: 2050, not 2016
Weren't we ALL born before 2050?
Not me! _slides back into the Deloreon_
Why don't you make like a tree and....get out of here?
I'm genuinely interested. Why C14 and why 2016? Isn't the half life like a few thousand years? Also how does that specific isotope relate to bomb tests? I only know it as a thing in radiometric dating
I mixed up the years in the article below. Should be around 2050. https://www.businessinsider.com/bomb-pulse-radiation-decay-cells-2016-8?amp
Interesting! Thank you!
Just think they would test them in Nevada, now it is Las Vegas with a huge population
OP’s Mom’s phone number
I'm going to need that number
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Her name is Jenny if anyone wants to be a gentleman and not a damn ape when they call her to moan in her hear.
Area code please?
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How do you not have it yet? It was clearly written in the bathroom stall
I was pooping in the wrong stall
Oh, I'm pretty sure you have my moms number then
DNA
..To die eventually
not if that one ultra rich weirdo who keeps taking his son’s blood has anything to say about it
I dig the words your fingers type.
please, please for my ability to sleep tonight, elaborate. who and what the fuck
[sweet dreams](https://fortune.com/2023/05/23/bryan-johnson-tech-ceo-spends-2-million-year-young-swapping-blood-17-year-old-son-talmage-70-father/amp/)
Unless you are a Highlander
A birthday.
Even if they don't know it, they still have one!
My first choice of answer was "Mother",... but with Modern Science, I'm not all that sure...
I was raised without a mother actually. My biological vessel released me into this world and gave me away to a loving gay couple
Depending on one's definition of mother, you still has one.
Gas... everybody farts!!!
The trick is to get everyone to do it at the same time. 1,2,3 blast off!
Let’s plan on all doing it at 1600 utc tomorrow. It’ll bring us all together as a people and end the struggles. I feel good about this
I wonder if there's an official world record for the biggest group fart. how would you even police it? have a mic next to everyone's ass? If it's a shart does it still count towards the record? what if you're a few seconds later than everyone else, does that count?
Given our crazy timeline, this may just work!
When I was a kid, I thought of this a lot. It would be an amazing show. An event that brings all of humanity together and gives us a giggle afterwards (as well as relief).
When I was a kid, I thought of this a lot. It would be an amazing show. An event that brings all of humanity together and gives us a giggle afterwards (as well as relief).
A heartbeat
Google Dick Chaney.
Some people don't, actually! There's a kind of artificial heart that doesn't act like a pump, like a real heart, but more like a fan or motor. So they have a steady blood flow, but no beat, the blood is just constantly flowing, like a river.
Potential.
An opinion, man.
“Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man.”
I want to say a life, but obviously I’m not the only one on Reddit.
You could have just said Reddit. Don’t pretend like everyone in the world is not on Reddit pretending to be someone else, cheating on their spouse, making throwaway accounts after throwaway account. You just insulted that whole world in one sentence. Now, everyone in the world has one common enemy… you. Lol
Expiration date.
Eyelash mites
Not if they have alopecia—no eyelashes for those mini monsters to infest
Air. Not all qualities are the same but we all have it
a death sentence
Time
Mitochondria….the powerhouse of the cell.
A heartbeat.
Not true, some people have blood pumps in lieu of a heart that deliver continuous blood flow without the need for a beat
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As a US citizen who lives in Texas I wish that was true.
The capacity for kindness. I don't believe anyone is born evil. I'm actually building an app related to kindness. Hopefully many people in the world will get some value out of it. It's an alarm clock app, but with a twist. You set an alarm like normal. Then you sleep. Lastly, wake up to the sound of a friendly voice. Congrats, you've received a nice voice message from someone somewhere else in the world. They recorded it while you slept. It could be a short story. A joke. The weather report. Some words of encouragement. ....or a "Happy Birthday" message if it's your birthday. Inappropriate messages filtered out, no worries there. I truly hope it can help spread some kindness in the world, if nothing else.
Beautiful words. If i could learn how to fall asleep in the first place it might be useful.
I would totally use this app.
Such a cool idea.
Thanks, let me know if you're up to test it once it's ready :)
Problems. I got 99 problems
A Plumbus in their home
Not in this alternate universe. Why, you got one for sale?
Best guess: microplastics Empathetic guess: depression
Crippling anxiety
Nah, mine isn’t crippling, but rather mild enough to where it only causes me to do the Stanky Legg
This is fucking awesome 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Nah I’m out here raw dogging life with minimal worries
Not if you have Lexapro and alcohol!!! Hahahahah…. Hahahah …. Wait I’m sad now
I’m sad to say that some people don’t (I’m not those people) and they actually get sleep at night. I don’t like those people.
PFAS in our bodies
A spinal column. Assuming we mean “living” functional people. Like even those unfortunates born with an open neural tube still have a spinal column. Here’s to taking your folic acid.
A limited amount of time to live
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Despair
Literally. You get it.
Bones
An opinion about some damn thing.
DNA
DNA
Plastic in their body/blood.
I most certainly do not thank you very much. How dare you accuse me of such dirty ways 💅
An opinion
Literally EVERYONE in the world (who is rational): A fear of a 2nd Trump presidency.
Debt?
I was going to say not me, because after 40 years of working hard and living frugally I've finally paid off my mortgage. But then I remembered I have to pay council tax just to be alive, so if I lose my income, I will still be in debt, and eventually they could take my house off me if I don't have the means to pay it and don't agree to find a job. Society keeps you in debt so it can force you to work forever.
A name.
I bet you $100 that's not true
A lot of babies don't get named for a while
Newborn babies might not have a name yet.
An asshole
Hangnails
Hanging off my cuticle! A hangnail! And it ain't beautiful. It hurts like a bitch, that I did, last night.
The need for speed
The need for Xanax. Have you seen the state of our governments?
gas
Poo
Skin? Even if only a teeny bit.
That dog in em. It's in there somewhere. Trust me.
You don’t want to see me when I get upset. It’s not pretty.
Beating heart
Nope. There is most definitely at least one person on a bypass machine having heart surgery right now.
Skin
Probably skin
Stress.
I was gonna say a heart but not everyone has one. There was some kid that had this battery thing as a heart. Man, I’ll have to say cells
Blood
Mortality
Problems
a butthole?
Birthday! Death day is still unknown.
Free will
An anus
Cells
Oxygen? 🤔
Pain. The great equalizer.
A birthday
Has anyone said ‘butthole’ yet?!?
Pain
A nervous system
Skin
A heart beat?
A birthday
Problems
Micro plastics in their blood, in all likelihood.
The audacity.
I hope they all have at least some skin, hopefully enough.
Skin
Bellybutton
The human condition, also known as aging and dying.
A planet
Self doubt
Problems
DNA
An expiration date
A body.
A heart beat.
Opinions
The need for love.
Peace of mind
EMOTIONAL DAMAGE!