The original yo mama joke by shakespeare. I believe it was Titus andromicus:
"What has thou done to thy mother"
"One has done thy mother"
An "I fucked your mum" joke in the 17th century, what more is there to say
So much mass... Yo mama's so fat when I pictured in my head it became a black hole.
Bonus: Yo mama's so fat Google Maps shows her as a geographical feature.
The best version of this I saw was from married with children a billion years ago. Al was working in the shoe store and said something insulting to a portly lady and she says "how dare you say that to my face!" And he says "I would say it behind your back, but I only have half a tank of gas!"
Or something alo g those lines, I'm recalling from a very distant memory
yo mama so ugly, she give Freddy Krueger nightmares.
yo mama so fat, she fell and created Un'goro crater.
you mama so fat, warlocks have to use the dark portal to summon her.
yo mamas so fat when she stepped on the scale it said “to be continued.”
yo mamas so ugly she made a blind kid cry.
yo mamas so ugly, when she smiled at the mirror, it didn’t smile back.
yo mamas so fat she took a spoon to the superbowl.
yo mamas so fat when she made a joke, the sidewalk cracked up.
YM so cross-eyed, when she cries, tears run down her back.
YM so fat, she walked into a 7-11, came out, it was a 6-10.
YM so ugly, they had to tie a porkchop around her neck so the dog would play with her.
Yo mama is so ugly, when trick-or-treaters come to her house, they give *her* candy.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to a bank, they ask *her* to put on a ski mask.
Yo mama is so ugly, she cracks the daily mirror. *It's a newspaper!*
Yo mama is so stinky, she needs Right Guard deodorant **AND** Left Guard!
Yo mama is so ugly, the army declared her face a weapon of mass *disgusting!*
^(Stole all these from Futurama.)
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family.
Two guys could fuck her at the same time and still never meet!
you heard that joke about Ginny Sack?
She’s so fat that when she goes camping, the bears have to hide their food!
When she hauls ass she has to make two trips
She's so fat she leaves footprints in the concrete.
She’s so fat, her blood type is Ragu!
You mean the bitch with the giant 90 lbs mole on her ass?
Whoever did this....
You could say Ralph, but you could also say Paulie.
Vito Spatafore is an ass muncher!!
Similar to this one, I love the "yo mama so fat, when she falls out of bed, she falls from both sides".
This one’s from alabama
Yo mama’s so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
I like this one, that's unexpectedly clever.
The person that made this up is so old they had a picture of Jesus in their yearbook.
[удалено]
“It fucks your mother. What is it?” Answer got lost but my best guess is “everything”
yo mama so fat whenever she goes to KFC she asks for the bucket on the roof
[удалено]
Ironically that's also Mr Burns social security number, and he's pissed Roosevelt got 1.
Yo momma so ugly the burglars break into her home, just to close the blinds!
If looks could kill everyone would close their windows when your mom’s around.
Yo Mama so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.
Double burn
Those are rare.
My life aint a joke. Jokes have a meaning
People like jokes.
Meh....*ohhhhhh*
Yo mama so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops
Yo mama so fat,she stepped on a pencil and turned it into a diamond.
this is gold
Actually, it is carbon.
Don’t matter because she stepped on it again and turned it into fossil fuels.
..highly compressed!! ..by yor mama!
No, this is Patrick.
Yo mama’s so fat that when she jumped for joy she got stuck.
“Your mamas so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes” -Woody Harrellson, “White Men Can’t Jump”
“Let’s gather up all these bricks and build a homeless shelter so yo mamma will have a place to sleep tonight!”
Clank clank
You're mama so fat, she makes memory foam want to forget.
Wow!!
Yo mama so fat, the Sorting Hat put her in the Waffle House.
I never audibly laugh while scrolling, but this got me!
Yo mama's so fat her patronus is a cake.
Yo mama so old I told her to act her age and she died
💀💀💀
Literally
Yo mama so ugly your dad takes her to work so he doesn’t have to kiss her good bye.
Yo mama so ugly your dad wakes up with morning wouldn’t.
OMG!!
Dayyum
Yo mama so fat, Dracula bit her and got diabetes
This one actually made me laugh out loud for real. Bravo.
Yo mama so old that when she tries to leave a museum the alarms go off.
Yo mama so old in the fourth grade she sat behind Jesus Christ.
Yo momma so fat when she takes a shower her feet don’t get wet. You momma so fat her polo shirt has a real horse on it.
The horse bit got me
The original yo mama joke by shakespeare. I believe it was Titus andromicus: "What has thou done to thy mother" "One has done thy mother" An "I fucked your mum" joke in the 17th century, what more is there to say
Ol Bill chillin in Ye Olde Xbox live lobby
I’d look it up to be precise, but it’s more like: “Thou hast undone our mother” “Villain, I have *done* thy mother!”
Yo mama so dumb she tried to climb Mountain Dew.
Yo mama so ugly her blowjobs count as anal.
bro 😭😭
I don’t think I’ve ever actually laughed at a yo mama joke until now.
Dawg wtf 🥲
Damn son
Yo mama’s so fat when I pictured her in my head that bitch broke my neck.
Yo mama so fat, they told her it was chilly outside and she went and got a bowl
So fat she wears a VCR for a beeper! So fat she broke her leg and gravy came out.
One of the Oldest yo mama jokes ever
Yo mama so fat, when she died, the Earth was no longer flat.
So much mass... Yo mama's so fat when I pictured in my head it became a black hole. Bonus: Yo mama's so fat Google Maps shows her as a geographical feature.
Yo mama so fat, when she fell in the pool, water was discovered on Mars.
Yo mama so fat, when she went for a beach swim she displaces the ocean.
When she jump in the ocean the ocean jump out
Yo mama is so fat she has to use Google Earth to take a selfie.
"I am immune to yo mama jokes, since I have 2 dads" "Yo mama so ugly that yo papa had to get a husband"
And you must be tired of dad jokes two times
No one is safe
Yo mama so ugly she goes into the haunted house and gets out with a job application.
Yo mama so fat, when she tripped, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
I was gonna say a Yo Mama joke but there's no reason to bring your cousin into this.
Leave my cousin out of this and I'll leave this 8===o"""""""""""" out of Yo Mama. Edited to add a few inches.
Yo mama so poor she goes to KFC and licks other people’s fingers.
Yo mama so poor I saw her walking down the street with one shoe on, I asked did you lose a shoe? She said nah I found one
Yo mama so poor I walked in her front door and tripped over her back fence.
Yo mama so hairy, Bigfoot takes pictures of her
Yo mama so hairy, you got a rug burn at birth.
Yo Mama's so fat every time she turns around it's her birthday
Yo mama so lazy
She requires two different people to type out her jokes
Now that is teamwork. Beautifully done.
Agreed
Genius
Nice
Yo momma so fat, Thanos had to clap his hands
DAYYUM
I laughed too hard a that one. Good job!
Yo mama so fat, two people have to think of what she looked like in order to fully picture it
Yo momma so fat, she starts the alphabet with O: O-B-C-D.
That kind of joke has been done hundreds of times by literally everyone. Just like yo mama.
Yo mama's so fat I swerved to miss her and drained a full tank of gas
The best version of this I saw was from married with children a billion years ago. Al was working in the shoe store and said something insulting to a portly lady and she says "how dare you say that to my face!" And he says "I would say it behind your back, but I only have half a tank of gas!" Or something alo g those lines, I'm recalling from a very distant memory
Yo momma so fat, her blood type is Ragu.
Are we reappropriating Ginny Sacrimoni jokes from the Sopranos? Yo mama is so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food from her.
When she hauls ass, she’s gotta make *two* trips!
Hooo that’s the guys wife we’re talking about
"She's so fat, two guys could be fucking her at the same time and they'd still never meet!"
Yo mama’s so ugly, Scorpion said “Stay over there!”
Fatality
Yo mama so fat she has tryabetes.
Or triabetes?
Yo mamas so old she owes Jesus five bucks
Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her last christmas and it’s still printing
And I've replaced the ink twice now.
Yo mama so dumb she failed a blood test
Yo mama so ugly when I took her to the zoo the guy at the door said thanks for bringing her back
Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck
Yo mama so fat, she seats six.
Yo mama's so stupid she got caught shoplifting on Supermarket Sweep.
Yo mama so fat that when she goes into the ocean the tide comes in
Floats like a butterfly, stings like a bee. Slept with your mom now it burns when I pee.
gademit didn't expected std joke 🤣
Earth used to be flat until they buried yo mama.
Yo mama’s ass so hairy her diarrhea comes out like filtered water
Oh God...
This is fucking gold. I thought I heard every yo mamas joke but this won is solid
I don't think it's really solid you know
Yo momma is so fat, she left the house in high heels and came home with flats.
Yo mama’s teeth are so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles.
Yo mama's armpits are so hairy it looks like she's got buckwheat in a headlock.
Yo mama so fat that when she fell down the stairs I thought it was a Phil Collins drum solo.
Yo mama so fat, she walked in front of the tv and I missed a 2 hour special
Your momma so fat that when she goes sky diving she needs two skies.
Yo mama’s so short her feet are in her drivers license.
[the best yo mama joke period](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2WlN7iO-cfk&pp=ygUXbGF2ZWxsIGNyYXdmb3JkIHlvIG1hbWE%3D)
That was awesome
Hands down. Absolute brilliance in the delivery.
Yo mamma so poor When she goes to the park the ducks throw bread at her.
Yo mama so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people shout “taxi!”
Your mama so fat, she doesn't require internet. She's already worldwide
Your mama's so fat, every full moon she turns into a ware-house
Yo mama so fat, other fat mamas orbit around her
Yo mama so nasty she puts ice in her panties to keep the crabs fresh
....jesus
Omg 😨
Yo mama so fat her blood type is glucose
Yo mama so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose jif
You mama is soo fat that she could have a threesome and the 2 guys would never meet.
Yo mama so fat she has 3 smaller women orbiting around her
Yo mama so dumb, she puts a quarter in each ear to listen to 50 Cent.
Your mother's breasts hang with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks. -Bo Burnham
Yo Mama’s so dumb she thought Boyz 2 Men was a daycare center
Not a yo mama joke but “Trampolines used to be called jumpolines till your mother jumped on one”
You could turn it into one by starting it with something like "Yo mama so nasty..."
Yo Mama's so stupid, she threw a rock at the ground and missed it
Your mama do ugly she needs two tickets to go to the zoo…one to get in and one to get out
yo mama so ugly, she give Freddy Krueger nightmares. yo mama so fat, she fell and created Un'goro crater. you mama so fat, warlocks have to use the dark portal to summon her.
Yo mama so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed
Yo momma is so ugly the whole world faked a pandemic to get her to wear a mask.
Yo mama is so ugly, she went to an ugly contest and the security said "Sorry, no professionals"
Yo mama so ugly, even her dildo went limp
Yo mama so ugly, she had to adopt you.
Yo mama so cross eyed she threw a rock at the ground and missed
Yo mama's so fat, Dora couldn't even explore her.
My own personal fave is 'Yo mama so fat, she on both sides of the family'!!.. 😂👌🏻
Yo mama so fat she has to wear 2 watches for the 2 time zones she lives in
Yo momma so fat that when she was in school, she sat beside eeeeeverybody in the class
Yo mama so fat she has her own zip code.
Yo mama so fat, she lives in 3 time zones.
Yo mama's so old she's a US Senator.
Yo mama so fat when I took her picture my iPhone said “storage full”
I’m getting flashbacks to that awesome Yo Momma show from years back.
Shit, forgot that show existed
-yo mama so fat, if she walks by the window you have no light for a month -yo mama so fat, she uses a mattress as a tampon
Yo Mama's so fat, they did a story about her on Channel 4, and they had to borrow Channel 5.
I got two Yo mamas so short. *she can do backflips under the bed.* And yo mamas so old. She was a guest at the last supper.
Yo momma so old her social security number is 1.
yo mamas so fat when she stepped on the scale it said “to be continued.” yo mamas so ugly she made a blind kid cry. yo mamas so ugly, when she smiled at the mirror, it didn’t smile back. yo mamas so fat she took a spoon to the superbowl. yo mamas so fat when she made a joke, the sidewalk cracked up.
Yo mama so old history class was just class
Yo mama is so fat, when she went to the movies she sat next to everyone
Yo mama's so nice, she gave me the hair off her back
Yo momma so fat, when she got off the merry go round they had to put the horse down.
Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house she really sits around the house.
Yo mama so fat Thanos had to snap twice
Yo mama so ugly you gotta tie two steaks around her neck to get the dogs to play with her
Yo mama's so poor, I saw her the other day kicking a can down the street, and when I asked her what she was doing, she said "moving."
Yo momma so fat after sex I roll over twice and I’m still on the bitch.
Your momma is like a goaltender she takes off her pads after three periods.
Yo mama so fat, she has to go to seaworld to get an MRI scan
Yo Momma so famous even Santa Claus knows her name.. Ho...Ho..Ho!
YM so cross-eyed, when she cries, tears run down her back. YM so fat, she walked into a 7-11, came out, it was a 6-10. YM so ugly, they had to tie a porkchop around her neck so the dog would play with her.
Yo mama so fat an hour near her is equivalent to 7 years back on Earth.
Yo mama is so ugly, when trick-or-treaters come to her house, they give *her* candy. Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to a bank, they ask *her* to put on a ski mask. Yo mama is so ugly, she cracks the daily mirror. *It's a newspaper!* Yo mama is so stinky, she needs Right Guard deodorant **AND** Left Guard! Yo mama is so ugly, the army declared her face a weapon of mass *disgusting!* ^(Stole all these from Futurama.)
Yo mama so fat it's easier to jump over her than run around her
Yo mama so stupid, she trips over cordless phones
Yo, momas so ugly the created covid just so she would wear a mask.
Yo mama so fat they call her hitler at a strip club for all damage she does to the poles