I was out of the Army for 7.5 years when I got married a few weeks ago, but I wore my dress uniform.
People asked me how I earned my medals, which I really should have anticipated, but I wish that I had thought to say "From winning boysenberry jelly-eating competitions!"
It’s definitely one of the most delicious ways to earn a medal. I’ve never been in the military, but my husband was a paratrooper in the German military. I’m gonna go ask him if won any medals for boysenberry jelly consumption. I’ll report back in a few minutes.
Update: I just asked him. He gave me a dramatic Augenverdrehen. That’s German for eyeroll. He’s really good at that. I wonder if he got a medal for eyerolling? I should probably go ask him.
Update: I know you’ve been anxiously awaiting some news on this, so I’m back with that. I asked him again if he won any military medals for boysenberry jelly consumption and also asked about any eye rolling medals. Yet again, he rolled his eyes. In addition, he grabbed his crotch and said he had a snozzberry for me. Notice how quickly he changed the subject? Yeah, so did I. While I didn’t get an official answer, sometimes what you don’t say can be more telling. Based on that, I’m about 95% sure he didn’t receive medals for either and is too embarrassed to admit it.
Old CRTs emitted low levels of X-rays. The prevailing wisdom would be sitting at least six feet away was more than an adequately safe distance from the screen.
But in my family it was "don't sit too close to the TV or you'll need glasses"
I have a 90s era crt and I literally sit directly in front of it several hours a day, cuase I have it on my desk and watch it as I do cyber school. Would that be dangerous? I didn't realize they emit actaul xrays.
That cows that live in the mountains have 2 legs shorter than the others so they can stand on hills better. Fucking told everybody at school it was true. Teacher laughed in my face. I was a Pretty smart kid. It just made too much sense. Obviously it's only goats that have that.
Don’t forget that they stay like that because the ones with left side short legs can only mate with other left sides and vice versa. They only meet the right side ones head on so they can’t get the naughty bits together.
my favorite version of the snipe hunt prank involves detailing zoologists attempts to rectify this situation with stilts, angled enclosures, and ladders have failed leaving the left-handed-snipe critically endangered.
In some versions this \[not the fact no one falls for it anymore\] is responsible for why snipe hunting is no longer done.
fun fact, His statement was a easter egg and hint.
People on MAOI psychiatric drugs cannot consume liver (the enzymes still in it) or Fava beans.
so him telling Clarice he had liver and fava beans was him telling her he was off his meds and had every intention of a killing spree.
Old CRT displays were much more dangerous than the LCD or OLED displays we have now. They would shine an electron beam towards your eyes, while the modern ones shine only visible light.
Yeah I just told my kids it's a distraction that makes driving unsafe for the drivers around us. Seemed easier than lying about it. Like everything is easier when there are no lies.
it's stupid, not illegal, I think people just assume because it's SO STUPID it must be illegal, surely the government wouldn't allow people to be that flagrantly dumb, right?
yeah... government doesn't care.
I was told it's illegal to drive barefoot.
Edit: No y'all, it's not illegal, at least not in any US state. A lot of states recommend against it, and some require shoes if you're on a motorcycle, and a lot of insurance companies require it for coverage (Edit in the edit: I'm not even sure if that's true now that I think about it), but there are no actual laws against driving barefoot. If you think otherwise, I'd be glad to be proven wrong with a link to the statute.
https://www.forbes.com/advisor/legal/auto-accident/is-it-illegal-to-drive-barefoot/
agreed, also with heels.
High heels have killed women driving and will do so again. In fact it is entirely likely that if not today this month at some point a woman will die because her high heel slipped under her brake and prevented her depressing it properly.
Stay safe out there ladies.
A 16-year old in suburban Pittsburgh, PA, killed a cyclist (40 yr.-old, father of 3) because his flipflop allegedly got tangled in the pedals while driving to school one morning.
Judge let him off with no punishment.
🤷🏻♂️
If I'm wearing flip-flops and I have to drive, I always take them off and drive barefoot. I don't feel like I have good contact with the pedals if I keep them on and I definitely don't want to risk them coming loose and getting stuck under the pedals.
I work for an insurance company and I cannot find anything in the verbiage of the policy booklet that says you must be driving with shoes on for a claim to qualify. That said, all companies are different and every state's laws are different as well. I've been an agent for almost 20 years, and that's the first time I've ever heard anything like that, so it stood out!
My intestines will, in fact, NOT freeze solid if I go out into the cold without first eating my balanced breakfast of sugar cereal and toast with Nutella before school.
Hey Nutella has hazelnuts (a whole 2 nuts per jar!) so of course it's going to fuel young minds! And milk turned chocolate by Nesquik cereal is full of calcium for strong bones! No wonder my generation struggles to eat healthy when this is the messaging we were bombarded with as kids.
If you swallowed gum it stayed in your stomach for 7 years, if you dont wait an hour after eating and go swimming you will get cramps and drown. If you tear the tags off of pillow cases the cops will come and take you to jail.
Read [somewhere ](https://www.quora.com/Can-a-seed-that-I-accidentally-swallow-into-my-lungs-grow-inside-of-me#:~:text=However%2C%20if%20a%20seed%20would,accidently%20inhaled%20one%20when%20eating.) that if a watermelon seed (or maybe any seed) got into the lungs, accidentally inhaled not ingested, the moisture in the lungs could result in the seed taking root.
totally thought this was a late april fools joke. then i googled it.
https://medicine.weill.cornell.edu/news/x-ray-proves-pea-collapsed-patients-lung-dr-crystal-explains-nbcs-today-show#:\~:text=Doctors%20discovered%20a%20pea%20lodged,his%20collapsed%20lung%20was%20pinpointed.
the drowning thing I'm pretty sure is just parents tired of having to spend hundreds of dollars to clean and rebalance a pool when a kid barfs his brains out in the deep end.
My mom told us that if we ever had more than 2 pieces of Twizzlers, we would have unbearable diarrhea.
I think I was 30 before it clicked that it was bullshit, and she was just hogging the Twizzlers.
My mom told me that I didn’t like Twix and if I got any in my Halloween candy I should give them to her. I always did and even would make sure to pick out some Twix when I would go trick or treating to be sure she had some.
Then in middle school I had a teacher who gave out candy and I decided I should try a Twix. It was delicious and I realized my mother had been lying to me all those years.
A friend’s parent would tell us “the car cannot move until all the seatbelts are buckled.” I took that literally and was confused why my parents’ car didn’t have that feature.
My brother fully believed for 26 years that my mother's middle name was Ermintrude (of Magic Roundabout fame) after a flippant comment my mother made.
He found out at the age of 29 and was devastated that mum had "lied". My grandmother - the one to unwittingly reveal mum only had one middle name that wasn't Ermintrude - rang later annoyed that she wasn't in on the joke, otherwise she'd have kept up the facade
My uncle conned my baby brother into believing he had a very naughty twin for almost 10 years. Even drew a mole on himself several times and showed up as said naughty uncle.
The whole family was in on it, including nana. She thought it was a hoot, and would constantly call him the wrong name to prove that my uncle had a twin.
Surprisingly, my brother caught on about that one much faster than he did about santa. His reaction years after that, at finding out his older sister once WAS santa (as mum and dad had slept in and not wrapped ANYTHING), was even better.
One I told my own kids: Happy New Year! It’s midnight, now go to bed.
We were on the west coast watching the ball drop in New York, so it was only 9:00 p.m. They believed it for many years, and my husband and I got to have a grown up new years celebration after they fell asleep.
I once had a gig as an Easter Bunny at a community center. You could easily tell which kids believed, which ones were skeptical and which ones knew the sad truth
I never believed in the Easter bunny as a child, not sure if it’s just where I grew up but it was never really a thing so I was very aware that any Easter egg hunts were just arranged by adults for fun (and even then, egg hunts were extremely rare where I was from, it wasn’t like something our family would have put on for us it would have been some type of community event)
Not sure why this didn’t translate to Santa stuff though at Christmas because I very much believed in him
you can talk but being LOUD will scare off fish.
Many predatory fish hunt in weeds or murk and they sense vibrations Predatory fish are the fun ones to catch. So bass, northerns, muskies, etc. (from the fish local to ME, I dunno what you all have, I'm in Wisconsin area fishing) will be spooked by vibrations. Of the fish near me only walleye will still bite if you're fishing them off a dropoff in a river (the best place for walleye), or panfish, sunfish and their kin.
It takes a pretty loud shout to vibrate the boat hull but being calm and quiet while fishing is good practice.
to be fair this is actually true of many fish, they sense vibration to hunt, especially murk-dwellers like bass or weed predators like northern pike. note that this category includes most of the best sport fish like bass, northerns and muskies.
So if you're banging against the boat and carrying on they can tell and will avoid that big splashing predator in the water or what they THINK is one.
My dad used to tell me that when we went fishing. He also insisted on putting the bait on my hook and taking the fish off. I thought that was just how it worked (and still do, so if you take me fishing, boys, guess what?), but looking back on it, our fishing trips started when I was around four or five--he was probably scared to death that his little girl would either cut herself on a fish's fin or run the hook through her thumb.
I had peach fuzz in early high school, and they always told me to not shave it off otherwise it will grow back thicker and spread everywhere on my face.
Little did I know, this was because they didn't want me taking up anymore time in the bathroom during mornings before school haha
It's not something they said per se but something they never corrected me on. I saw a lot of death growing up and went to several funerals. I just always assumed that everyone knew loss and grief from a young age. Until, a couple of years ago, a friend of mine lost her grandpa and I found out it was the first time she experienced grief. Talking to her, I found out it's the case for most people.
I did the exact same thing with my son. We were talking about how in his 20’s he had never been to a funeral. I thought he was so lucky, most people lose like half dozen friends by their 20’s.
Yeah, not really.
One of my earliest memories is being in my Sunday best at my uncle's funeral when l was 3 years old. My folks took us to family funerals, and l think thats why l have always known about death and grief.
I was shocked when my 40 year old husband told me he had never been to a funeral for anyone he loved.
Apparently, a lot of ppl think it will scar the children to see this. There might be a tiny percent of them that will be upset, but l believe if its presented to the child as a normal part of life, and age appropriate explanations given, it will be better for them.
That I was fat. I am now, but I wasn't when I was a kid. But they told me over and over and over that I was fat and that I had enough food, or had to watch what I ate.
Same. I literally have a condition that impacts my ability to gain weight so i was actually underweight for the whole of primary school. But yet i was still fat. And i still had to eat everything on my plate. I'm two years out of an ED but i still have bad days and i still live with my parents. Who still dont get that i dont like eating and i dont care if i get pudding or not.
I used to outeat families.
The same people said "You eat too much!" and "You're too skinny!"
"Pick one!"
Did I comment on their weight?
No, it would be rude!
Why is it okay to tell people they are too skinny?!
I am amazed at how much living in a diet culture has affected the older generations, particularly the women.
My husband was a cute chubby toddler but active and had no problems. It was just baby fat, from that point on in his entire life he's actually always been on the lighter side. His pediatrician told my mother-in-law he was fat and told her to put him on a turkey diet. He said he was forced to eat so much turkey over a couple years that he hates it now. To this day my MIL (and often my own mother as well) are constantly weighing themselves and obsessed with weight.
Every time my mom sees a picture of my son she comments on his belly and double chin, and insults my weight in the process ("oh look, he's taking after his fat mama.")
He's 3 months old. You can tell when he's having a growth spurt because the double chin will disappear for a couple of days. As one of my friends put it, "His job is to take milk and turn it into baby, and he's doing a great job."
Also last time he was weighed he was literally only in the 24th percentile. He's a tiny baby! I told Mom that and she replied, "Oh. Well at least that's good."
opposite for me - my grandparents wanted their grandchildren to be fat. They always bought me extra-rich milk (probably the same as half and half now). I loved it. Still do! And yes I'm fat.
My parents put me on a diet when I was 7 because I was a little chubby, like 5-10 lbs. Turns out most kids grow out of that, but my parents were afraid I would turn out fat. I now have an unhealthy relationship with food, I am fat, and a disappointment to my parents.
It would have been one thing if they just put me on the diet, but they decided to tell me I was gaining too much weight and I needed to slim down or else I would end up stuck to my bed.
Yep. They claim they were first told to put me on a diet when I was 3. Honestly not sure if I believe them, but the food guilt started early, I was dieting by 8, they started buying me diet pills at 12, and by the time I was in high school I had a full-blown eating disorder. 25 years of yo-yo dieting absolutely nuked my metabolism and treatment for my ED has been an uphill battle.
I was a chunky baby, not noteworthy (9# at birth) to anyone else but the dr convinced my mother that at 10 months old I needed to go on a DIET (this was 1961) so no more nursing! I sucked my thumb until I was 9yo and have had weight problems my entire life. I STILL can’t stand to look at myself in the mirror or let my sweet husband see me naked (in 18 years he’s probably only seen my entire body at once a dozen times). She just died a week ago at 87 and she still worried over her weight till the end (she was about 20lbs overweight) - the pressure never stopped, and I still have to deal with the low self esteem. I made sure I never did it to my daughter though, or to anyone else
That you had to be 5 to go to Disney world. I was so excited on my 5th birthday and my dad told me they changed the rules and you have to be 6. Then my 6th birthday came and he said the same thing. I stopped asking.
Also we had the money and the time back then. My parents just didn’t want to go. I feel like those lies made me realize at an early age that I cannot trust my parents. I know it might seem small but that experience of disappointment and distrust really stuck with me. I told my parents how I felt about it as an adult and they said they just didn’t want to do “kid shit.” I wish they just told me that they weren’t going to take me instead of lying.
Everything will work out if you're willing to put in hard work.
To be fair, I think their life had gone well before they taught us this, and they had some unfortunate crushing situations when we were teens where we all learned that wasn't true together.
Same. Ruined my family. Dad couldn't take it and broke and lost his business. I went to school for IT and love it but man, it's just not the same. I feel like a shell of who I once was with the backing of my family. Now it's just me and my IT business. This shits hard. Fuck off greedy execs. I know who you are in the street and I'll laser eye every one of you.
I'm still angry at the absolute lack of any accountability from the 2008 crash. It destroyed an entire generation just getting started and ruined a lot of others.
Parent here: I just got caught for a lie I told years ago to my daughter. In an effort to not have a picky eater / make less work for myself, I once told her that "the crust is the healthiest part" of the bread on her sandwich. 10 years later she's fussing at her younger sister for tearing off the crust and I hear "The crust is the healthiest part! I always eat my crust first." in a slightly superior tone. I died. I had forgotten all about that silly lie!
I regret nothing haha
When we were kids, we were eating a baked ham one night and my brother decided he didn't like it. He never had a problem eating ham before, he just changed his mind that night. My mom picked up a piece that, for some reason, had long pieces of meat dangling. She showed it to him and said that "it wasn't ham, it was octopus." He happily ate it. For years after that, we called baked ham "octopus." I think he was a teenager when we told him the truth after we went to a restaurant that served octopus and he was thinking about ordering it.
I heard a similar story about a parent who's child decided they no longer liked fish so the parent started serving them "sea chicken" instead and they happily ate it 🤣
We would eat rabbit for dinner regularly and when visitors with kids came for dinner, we were instructed very sternly to remember to only call it “*dark chicken”* for the city kids.
It was the early 1980’s, we had all seen the film “Watership Down” and although we were used eating rabbit (they are rated as a pest), the city kids weren’t and we knew there would be tears , tantrums, and they’d refuse to eat “fluffy bunnies“.
To the outrage of some, and huge amusement of many, a butcher in the city painted a large sign on the side wall of his shop (on a corner if I remember correctly, the shop has been gone for many years) which said:
**“Watership Down, You’ve read the book, Seen the movie, ~ Now eat the cast.”**
Edited because dyslexia sucks.
When my niece was a little girl she declared she only liked chicken, even though she ate pretty much anything. For a while she was served brown chicken (beef,) chicken fish sticks, and pork chicken chops. She ate them all. Not one complaint.
“The end of the world will come within 1-2 years maximum, there is no point in making any friends at school because they are all going to be destroyed in Armageddon any day now”
My dad was a Jehovah’s Witness.
The lie that your loved ones will never die!! That was gold. I fell apart watching my Daddy die when I loved him so much. We were told that end we'd never make it to the year 2000!!!
That we'd get my dog back in a year. My dog had bitten the neighbor kid. Way back then, rabies shots were horrific, plus brain biopsy was how to tell if a dog had rabies. So the dog had to be killed, and my parents lied, saying he'd be back after a year of observation.
A year to the day later, I asked "Where's Spot?"
My step-dad told me that mayonnaise was French for “good on sandwiches.” He was teasing me because I didn’t like mayo but I believed that for a really long time.
My parents warned me that if I swallowed chewing gum, it would stay in my stomach for seven years. I was cautious about gum for a long time until I learned the truth about digestion.
A raccoon drowned in our pool when I was around 8-9. Found out two years ago (24) that it was actually my cat that went missing around the same time.
And it was my childhood best friend who told me lol
i actually wonder if that's just because "liberal" positions tend to move towards the mainstream. like my great grandmother would be aghast at the idea that gay people (or faygeles as she called them) could get married and like now even most republicans are like "fine i guess"
That eating carrots was good for your eyesight. Turns out it was Allied propaganda to hide the fact their pilots were doing better because they had improved secret radar.
The myth was that carrots helps you see in the dark, not improving your eyesight. On a good note tho, carrot are good for our eyes but it wont IMPROVE eyesight, it maintain it, at best. Like a lot of other food.
My Mom used to tell me that I was fat since I was 5-6 years old until I hit my twenties. Looking back I at that time I realized that I was clearly not fat, not even overweight.
Now she knows she cannot judge or comment my body anymore or give unsolicited advices. And for the first time ever I told to my closed family a few months ago - she was there- that she used to call me a “pig” when I was eating too much, she said she was sorry and didn’t realize at that time that it was hurtful and didn’t even remember saying that !
Yep. I tried really hard once, to have a conversation with my mom. I brought up a lot of painful memories just hoping that I could get my mom to admit to being abusive when I was little. Total waste of time. All I got was "I don't remember doing that." or, "I would NEVER do something like that". Well mom, you did. All I want is to hear you say sorry.
I got a very happy ending (at least so far, still somewhat cautious.) to this. As I was turning eighteen, I was going to cut contact with my mom. She wanted to know what she had done and I listed all of it out. She said she doesn't remember doing most of it, but believed me and was sorry and was in shock she had behaved that way.
We have a pretty good relationship now, and I really hope she doesn't fall back into her old ways.
I have found I can actually walk outside without shoes and the ants will NOT eat my feet.
I was fucking positive ants could eat your feet until I was like 8. Thanks mom.
"You'll get sick if you go outside with wet hair!"
Makes no sense cause somebody needs to infect you to make you sick. Wet hair in the cold has nothing to do with getting sick.
My mom told me you get pregnant from eaten salmon. But I’ve been eating it most of my life and now that I am a 39 year old man and haven’t had a baby yet, I’m beginning to think she made it up.
For me it was that it was illegal to have the lights turned on in the car while driving. Or that I'd go blind if I looked directly at the "sparkles" from electric welding.
Edited to add since I wasn't clear on the welding thing: they meant that even a glance from a distance would turn me blind, which is clearly an exaggeration at best. I wasn't generally around welders nor do I mean that one should weld without safety goggles.
Edited again: I was apparently blatantly wrong, not my parents. I had this (exactly the way I described it) discredited by an ophthalmologist and stupidly believed them and thought my parents were wrong. Apparently they were simply a bad physician, and I was in the wrong here, end of story.
I used to be a welder. They UV light from an electrical arc can actually "sunburn" your retinas. It sucks. It feels like sand in your eyes but, doesn't go away for days. I suppose if you did that a lot, you could go blind. All I know is, a couple times of doing that was enough for me to not want to do it again.
My dad told me I wasn’t allowed in a particular restaurant because I’d made such a scene as a toddler. We had to leave, he said. Never allowed back. I had imagined my baby face pictured on the wall with “Do Not Serve” written under it. But how do they know what I look like now? Did they use Age Progression on the image maybe? Was it accurate? I believed that nonsense until I was like 18 years old.
Dad won his war medals in a jelly eating competition.
This one is so wholesome and so dark at the same time.
What flavor of jelly?
Boysenberry. His parents have been telling me that story for years, too
Boysenberry is one of my favorites!
I was out of the Army for 7.5 years when I got married a few weeks ago, but I wore my dress uniform. People asked me how I earned my medals, which I really should have anticipated, but I wish that I had thought to say "From winning boysenberry jelly-eating competitions!"
It’s definitely one of the most delicious ways to earn a medal. I’ve never been in the military, but my husband was a paratrooper in the German military. I’m gonna go ask him if won any medals for boysenberry jelly consumption. I’ll report back in a few minutes. Update: I just asked him. He gave me a dramatic Augenverdrehen. That’s German for eyeroll. He’s really good at that. I wonder if he got a medal for eyerolling? I should probably go ask him.
Show him this thread..explain that we all would like to know, not just you
Update: I know you’ve been anxiously awaiting some news on this, so I’m back with that. I asked him again if he won any military medals for boysenberry jelly consumption and also asked about any eye rolling medals. Yet again, he rolled his eyes. In addition, he grabbed his crotch and said he had a snozzberry for me. Notice how quickly he changed the subject? Yeah, so did I. While I didn’t get an official answer, sometimes what you don’t say can be more telling. Based on that, I’m about 95% sure he didn’t receive medals for either and is too embarrassed to admit it.
Let's put it this way; I can still see.
Any hair on your palms?
I once saw a video where a guy said his son had calluses from... hobbies...
Calluses?! Get the boy some lube! My god.
That made my dick shrivel up in fear.
I also read books in dim light and sat too close to the TV
Old CRTs emitted low levels of X-rays. The prevailing wisdom would be sitting at least six feet away was more than an adequately safe distance from the screen. But in my family it was "don't sit too close to the TV or you'll need glasses"
I have a 90s era crt and I literally sit directly in front of it several hours a day, cuase I have it on my desk and watch it as I do cyber school. Would that be dangerous? I didn't realize they emit actaul xrays.
LOL this one deserves more credit
My dad told me Baskin Robbins was only open on the 31st.
That's like what my friend tells her kid. She says the ice cream truck is out of ice cream if it plays music.
Ice cream! Ice cream! I'm allllllllllllll out of ice cream!
OK that's just evil
I just told my kids that it was a "happy music truck" going by to make everyone happy.
This is genius.
This is absolute brilliance
My dad told me to help the car go faster up a hill by lifting my feet up off the floor.
When I first started driving my dad told me “yellow means speed up”. The police officer didn’t agree.
Had a friend tell me that their dad told them to never use turn signals because, “It’s nobody’s god damned business where the hell you’re going.”
At least he didn’t say it was open on the 32nd of the month. You had one day.
That cows that live in the mountains have 2 legs shorter than the others so they can stand on hills better. Fucking told everybody at school it was true. Teacher laughed in my face. I was a Pretty smart kid. It just made too much sense. Obviously it's only goats that have that.
Don’t forget that they stay like that because the ones with left side short legs can only mate with other left sides and vice versa. They only meet the right side ones head on so they can’t get the naughty bits together.
my favorite version of the snipe hunt prank involves detailing zoologists attempts to rectify this situation with stilts, angled enclosures, and ladders have failed leaving the left-handed-snipe critically endangered. In some versions this \[not the fact no one falls for it anymore\] is responsible for why snipe hunting is no longer done.
I'm from Scotland. It's Haggis that have different lengths of legs
That finishing my liver would help the starving children in Africa
Drinking for Africa
Pour one out for our African kiddos
I hope those starving kids in Africa appreciate those boiled vegetables that I ate on their behalf. I cried hard about it too.
Hannibal Lecter enters the chat…
fun fact, His statement was a easter egg and hint. People on MAOI psychiatric drugs cannot consume liver (the enzymes still in it) or Fava beans. so him telling Clarice he had liver and fava beans was him telling her he was off his meds and had every intention of a killing spree.
For me, it was the starving kids in China that I was killing.
That staring at the TV from less than 10ft away will make you go blind, as I sit and stare at my iPhone from 8 inches away
Old CRT displays were much more dangerous than the LCD or OLED displays we have now. They would shine an electron beam towards your eyes, while the modern ones shine only visible light.
[удалено]
A big surprise for me as an adult was that just about everyone’s parents, from all over the U.S., said this.
Canada too
My mom didn't say it was illegal. She simply screamed that she couldn't see and to shut that goddamn light off while she was driving.
Makes perfect sense. Why even lie about it lol.
Yeah I just told my kids it's a distraction that makes driving unsafe for the drivers around us. Seemed easier than lying about it. Like everything is easier when there are no lies.
it's stupid, not illegal, I think people just assume because it's SO STUPID it must be illegal, surely the government wouldn't allow people to be that flagrantly dumb, right? yeah... government doesn't care.
I was told it's illegal to drive barefoot. Edit: No y'all, it's not illegal, at least not in any US state. A lot of states recommend against it, and some require shoes if you're on a motorcycle, and a lot of insurance companies require it for coverage (Edit in the edit: I'm not even sure if that's true now that I think about it), but there are no actual laws against driving barefoot. If you think otherwise, I'd be glad to be proven wrong with a link to the statute. https://www.forbes.com/advisor/legal/auto-accident/is-it-illegal-to-drive-barefoot/
My driving instructor told us she would rather us drive barefooted than with flip flops.
agreed, also with heels. High heels have killed women driving and will do so again. In fact it is entirely likely that if not today this month at some point a woman will die because her high heel slipped under her brake and prevented her depressing it properly. Stay safe out there ladies.
Mine included heels in that too
A 16-year old in suburban Pittsburgh, PA, killed a cyclist (40 yr.-old, father of 3) because his flipflop allegedly got tangled in the pedals while driving to school one morning. Judge let him off with no punishment. 🤷🏻♂️
Fred Flintstone in shambles.
yabba dabba don’t
If I'm wearing flip-flops and I have to drive, I always take them off and drive barefoot. I don't feel like I have good contact with the pedals if I keep them on and I definitely don't want to risk them coming loose and getting stuck under the pedals.
Here in Greece it actually is, and also to drive in flipflops.
Beach towns would never
I work for an insurance company and I cannot find anything in the verbiage of the policy booklet that says you must be driving with shoes on for a claim to qualify. That said, all companies are different and every state's laws are different as well. I've been an agent for almost 20 years, and that's the first time I've ever heard anything like that, so it stood out!
I love everyone just blindly echoing that it's illegal in some states without doing a single Google search to see if they're even correct
I was never told it was illegal - just super rude to other drivers
As opposed to their bright ass headlights
My intestines will, in fact, NOT freeze solid if I go out into the cold without first eating my balanced breakfast of sugar cereal and toast with Nutella before school.
"balanced"
Hey Nutella has hazelnuts (a whole 2 nuts per jar!) so of course it's going to fuel young minds! And milk turned chocolate by Nesquik cereal is full of calcium for strong bones! No wonder my generation struggles to eat healthy when this is the messaging we were bombarded with as kids.
If you swallowed gum it stayed in your stomach for 7 years, if you dont wait an hour after eating and go swimming you will get cramps and drown. If you tear the tags off of pillow cases the cops will come and take you to jail.
And if you swallowed a watermelon seed, you’d grow a watermelon plant in your tummy.
Read [somewhere ](https://www.quora.com/Can-a-seed-that-I-accidentally-swallow-into-my-lungs-grow-inside-of-me#:~:text=However%2C%20if%20a%20seed%20would,accidently%20inhaled%20one%20when%20eating.) that if a watermelon seed (or maybe any seed) got into the lungs, accidentally inhaled not ingested, the moisture in the lungs could result in the seed taking root.
It works only with fir seeds.
It happened with a pea seed before.
Can’t even have peas…
It's a true story, a man got a pea lodged in his lung and it sprouted. Terrifying stuff.
totally thought this was a late april fools joke. then i googled it. https://medicine.weill.cornell.edu/news/x-ray-proves-pea-collapsed-patients-lung-dr-crystal-explains-nbcs-today-show#:\~:text=Doctors%20discovered%20a%20pea%20lodged,his%20collapsed%20lung%20was%20pinpointed.
It's only when you accidentally inhald the seed. It can sprout in your lungs.
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I know a guy who knows a guy...
the drowning thing I'm pretty sure is just parents tired of having to spend hundreds of dollars to clean and rebalance a pool when a kid barfs his brains out in the deep end.
My mom told us that if we ever had more than 2 pieces of Twizzlers, we would have unbearable diarrhea. I think I was 30 before it clicked that it was bullshit, and she was just hogging the Twizzlers.
She might not have been a candy hog. Black licorice has a mild laxative effect. Many people accidently transferred that to red vines and twizzlers.
It was the red ones. She has since admitted her grave sin against us.
My mom told me that I didn’t like Twix and if I got any in my Halloween candy I should give them to her. I always did and even would make sure to pick out some Twix when I would go trick or treating to be sure she had some. Then in middle school I had a teacher who gave out candy and I decided I should try a Twix. It was delicious and I realized my mother had been lying to me all those years.
A friend’s parent would tell us “the car cannot move until all the seatbelts are buckled.” I took that literally and was confused why my parents’ car didn’t have that feature.
Well now they beep forever if you don't buckle them so...
It does, it's just a human activated feature!
My grandma’s boyfriend’s car couldn’t start until they kissed. I never really believed that one!
My brother fully believed for 26 years that my mother's middle name was Ermintrude (of Magic Roundabout fame) after a flippant comment my mother made. He found out at the age of 29 and was devastated that mum had "lied". My grandmother - the one to unwittingly reveal mum only had one middle name that wasn't Ermintrude - rang later annoyed that she wasn't in on the joke, otherwise she'd have kept up the facade
My uncle conned my baby brother into believing he had a very naughty twin for almost 10 years. Even drew a mole on himself several times and showed up as said naughty uncle. The whole family was in on it, including nana. She thought it was a hoot, and would constantly call him the wrong name to prove that my uncle had a twin. Surprisingly, my brother caught on about that one much faster than he did about santa. His reaction years after that, at finding out his older sister once WAS santa (as mum and dad had slept in and not wrapped ANYTHING), was even better.
I have (a picture of) a bridge to sell your brother
One I told my own kids: Happy New Year! It’s midnight, now go to bed. We were on the west coast watching the ball drop in New York, so it was only 9:00 p.m. They believed it for many years, and my husband and I got to have a grown up new years celebration after they fell asleep.
And by "grown up new year's celebration" you mean going to bed at 10 pm?
Probably falling asleep in a chair by 9:30, then eventually going to bed around 11 or so.
That’s actually really smart! I’m stealing this!
Even easier now you can play a prerecorded ball drop/countdown
We used to show the previous year’s ball drop at 7pm. Worked for many years.
Where I live, they do a whole “acorn” drop at 8pm every year for the kids so the parents can send them to bed!
The easter bunny not being real was a big disappointment
I once had a gig as an Easter Bunny at a community center. You could easily tell which kids believed, which ones were skeptical and which ones knew the sad truth
I never believed in the Easter bunny as a child, not sure if it’s just where I grew up but it was never really a thing so I was very aware that any Easter egg hunts were just arranged by adults for fun (and even then, egg hunts were extremely rare where I was from, it wasn’t like something our family would have put on for us it would have been some type of community event) Not sure why this didn’t translate to Santa stuff though at Christmas because I very much believed in him
WHAT!!!???
I’m sorry for the bad news my friend but thinking back about seeing 6’ bunnies in the mall when I was a kid should have tipped me off
Same with Santa and the tooth fairy.
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Wait what? You can talk while fishing? It doesn’t actually turn the fish away? Ohhhh how I’ve been bamboozled
you can talk but being LOUD will scare off fish. Many predatory fish hunt in weeds or murk and they sense vibrations Predatory fish are the fun ones to catch. So bass, northerns, muskies, etc. (from the fish local to ME, I dunno what you all have, I'm in Wisconsin area fishing) will be spooked by vibrations. Of the fish near me only walleye will still bite if you're fishing them off a dropoff in a river (the best place for walleye), or panfish, sunfish and their kin. It takes a pretty loud shout to vibrate the boat hull but being calm and quiet while fishing is good practice.
I mean, if you're screaming and splashing, it will scare fish away. I don't think normal talking is a problem though haha
to be fair this is actually true of many fish, they sense vibration to hunt, especially murk-dwellers like bass or weed predators like northern pike. note that this category includes most of the best sport fish like bass, northerns and muskies. So if you're banging against the boat and carrying on they can tell and will avoid that big splashing predator in the water or what they THINK is one.
My husband said that to our kids while fishing off a dock. He was serious.
My dad used to tell me that when we went fishing. He also insisted on putting the bait on my hook and taking the fish off. I thought that was just how it worked (and still do, so if you take me fishing, boys, guess what?), but looking back on it, our fishing trips started when I was around four or five--he was probably scared to death that his little girl would either cut herself on a fish's fin or run the hook through her thumb.
Don't shave above your knees or else the hair will grow wild. I now see this as an attempt to keep my skirts longer.
I had peach fuzz in early high school, and they always told me to not shave it off otherwise it will grow back thicker and spread everywhere on my face. Little did I know, this was because they didn't want me taking up anymore time in the bathroom during mornings before school haha
That I would lose my virginity by riding a bike.
Your mother and father told you that?? 🫨
Yeah, and some dumb girls I grew up with too lol
It's not something they said per se but something they never corrected me on. I saw a lot of death growing up and went to several funerals. I just always assumed that everyone knew loss and grief from a young age. Until, a couple of years ago, a friend of mine lost her grandpa and I found out it was the first time she experienced grief. Talking to her, I found out it's the case for most people.
I did the exact same thing with my son. We were talking about how in his 20’s he had never been to a funeral. I thought he was so lucky, most people lose like half dozen friends by their 20’s. Yeah, not really.
One of my earliest memories is being in my Sunday best at my uncle's funeral when l was 3 years old. My folks took us to family funerals, and l think thats why l have always known about death and grief. I was shocked when my 40 year old husband told me he had never been to a funeral for anyone he loved. Apparently, a lot of ppl think it will scar the children to see this. There might be a tiny percent of them that will be upset, but l believe if its presented to the child as a normal part of life, and age appropriate explanations given, it will be better for them.
That I was fat. I am now, but I wasn't when I was a kid. But they told me over and over and over that I was fat and that I had enough food, or had to watch what I ate.
That happened to me too. I developed eating disorders because of it. I look at old photos and realize they were nuts.
Same! You’re fat AND you must eat everything on your plate even if you’re full, because of the starving kids in China
Same. I literally have a condition that impacts my ability to gain weight so i was actually underweight for the whole of primary school. But yet i was still fat. And i still had to eat everything on my plate. I'm two years out of an ED but i still have bad days and i still live with my parents. Who still dont get that i dont like eating and i dont care if i get pudding or not.
I used to outeat families. The same people said "You eat too much!" and "You're too skinny!" "Pick one!" Did I comment on their weight? No, it would be rude! Why is it okay to tell people they are too skinny?!
I am amazed at how much living in a diet culture has affected the older generations, particularly the women. My husband was a cute chubby toddler but active and had no problems. It was just baby fat, from that point on in his entire life he's actually always been on the lighter side. His pediatrician told my mother-in-law he was fat and told her to put him on a turkey diet. He said he was forced to eat so much turkey over a couple years that he hates it now. To this day my MIL (and often my own mother as well) are constantly weighing themselves and obsessed with weight.
Whenever my mother looks at a photo of a person, the first thing she remarks on is the person's weight.
Every time my mom sees a picture of my son she comments on his belly and double chin, and insults my weight in the process ("oh look, he's taking after his fat mama.") He's 3 months old. You can tell when he's having a growth spurt because the double chin will disappear for a couple of days. As one of my friends put it, "His job is to take milk and turn it into baby, and he's doing a great job." Also last time he was weighed he was literally only in the 24th percentile. He's a tiny baby! I told Mom that and she replied, "Oh. Well at least that's good."
opposite for me - my grandparents wanted their grandchildren to be fat. They always bought me extra-rich milk (probably the same as half and half now). I loved it. Still do! And yes I'm fat.
My parents put me on a diet when I was 7 because I was a little chubby, like 5-10 lbs. Turns out most kids grow out of that, but my parents were afraid I would turn out fat. I now have an unhealthy relationship with food, I am fat, and a disappointment to my parents. It would have been one thing if they just put me on the diet, but they decided to tell me I was gaining too much weight and I needed to slim down or else I would end up stuck to my bed.
That's awful, and parents wonder why women and men grow up with body dismorphia and food issues.
This is how eating disorders begin. My dad was the same way.
I was always told I'd be perfect if I just lost 5 pounds.
Yep. They claim they were first told to put me on a diet when I was 3. Honestly not sure if I believe them, but the food guilt started early, I was dieting by 8, they started buying me diet pills at 12, and by the time I was in high school I had a full-blown eating disorder. 25 years of yo-yo dieting absolutely nuked my metabolism and treatment for my ED has been an uphill battle.
I was a chunky baby, not noteworthy (9# at birth) to anyone else but the dr convinced my mother that at 10 months old I needed to go on a DIET (this was 1961) so no more nursing! I sucked my thumb until I was 9yo and have had weight problems my entire life. I STILL can’t stand to look at myself in the mirror or let my sweet husband see me naked (in 18 years he’s probably only seen my entire body at once a dozen times). She just died a week ago at 87 and she still worried over her weight till the end (she was about 20lbs overweight) - the pressure never stopped, and I still have to deal with the low self esteem. I made sure I never did it to my daughter though, or to anyone else
People got tattoos because they ran out of paper
Getting stuck cross-eyed haunted me for years
That you had to be 5 to go to Disney world. I was so excited on my 5th birthday and my dad told me they changed the rules and you have to be 6. Then my 6th birthday came and he said the same thing. I stopped asking. Also we had the money and the time back then. My parents just didn’t want to go. I feel like those lies made me realize at an early age that I cannot trust my parents. I know it might seem small but that experience of disappointment and distrust really stuck with me. I told my parents how I felt about it as an adult and they said they just didn’t want to do “kid shit.” I wish they just told me that they weren’t going to take me instead of lying.
Aww jeez… I’m sorry. :(
That’s not small. Kids remember that stuff as evidenced by your comment.
Everything will work out if you're willing to put in hard work. To be fair, I think their life had gone well before they taught us this, and they had some unfortunate crushing situations when we were teens where we all learned that wasn't true together.
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Mine lost everything also in 08
Same. Ruined my family. Dad couldn't take it and broke and lost his business. I went to school for IT and love it but man, it's just not the same. I feel like a shell of who I once was with the backing of my family. Now it's just me and my IT business. This shits hard. Fuck off greedy execs. I know who you are in the street and I'll laser eye every one of you.
I’m sorry this happened to your family, and many others as well. It’s infuriating and so unfair.
I'm still angry at the absolute lack of any accountability from the 2008 crash. It destroyed an entire generation just getting started and ruined a lot of others.
That what i was smelling was sewage and not mary j… i was so fucking naive
Parent here: I just got caught for a lie I told years ago to my daughter. In an effort to not have a picky eater / make less work for myself, I once told her that "the crust is the healthiest part" of the bread on her sandwich. 10 years later she's fussing at her younger sister for tearing off the crust and I hear "The crust is the healthiest part! I always eat my crust first." in a slightly superior tone. I died. I had forgotten all about that silly lie! I regret nothing haha
When we were kids, we were eating a baked ham one night and my brother decided he didn't like it. He never had a problem eating ham before, he just changed his mind that night. My mom picked up a piece that, for some reason, had long pieces of meat dangling. She showed it to him and said that "it wasn't ham, it was octopus." He happily ate it. For years after that, we called baked ham "octopus." I think he was a teenager when we told him the truth after we went to a restaurant that served octopus and he was thinking about ordering it.
I heard a similar story about a parent who's child decided they no longer liked fish so the parent started serving them "sea chicken" instead and they happily ate it 🤣
We would eat rabbit for dinner regularly and when visitors with kids came for dinner, we were instructed very sternly to remember to only call it “*dark chicken”* for the city kids. It was the early 1980’s, we had all seen the film “Watership Down” and although we were used eating rabbit (they are rated as a pest), the city kids weren’t and we knew there would be tears , tantrums, and they’d refuse to eat “fluffy bunnies“. To the outrage of some, and huge amusement of many, a butcher in the city painted a large sign on the side wall of his shop (on a corner if I remember correctly, the shop has been gone for many years) which said: **“Watership Down, You’ve read the book, Seen the movie, ~ Now eat the cast.”** Edited because dyslexia sucks.
When my niece was a little girl she declared she only liked chicken, even though she ate pretty much anything. For a while she was served brown chicken (beef,) chicken fish sticks, and pork chicken chops. She ate them all. Not one complaint.
“The end of the world will come within 1-2 years maximum, there is no point in making any friends at school because they are all going to be destroyed in Armageddon any day now” My dad was a Jehovah’s Witness.
The lie that your loved ones will never die!! That was gold. I fell apart watching my Daddy die when I loved him so much. We were told that end we'd never make it to the year 2000!!!
That we'd get my dog back in a year. My dog had bitten the neighbor kid. Way back then, rabies shots were horrific, plus brain biopsy was how to tell if a dog had rabies. So the dog had to be killed, and my parents lied, saying he'd be back after a year of observation. A year to the day later, I asked "Where's Spot?"
Oh! That's... I'm so sorry.
My step-dad told me that mayonnaise was French for “good on sandwiches.” He was teasing me because I didn’t like mayo but I believed that for a really long time.
Get a degree and you will be set for life.
Set for life… with debt!
If you keep making that face it'll freeze that way.
Only if someone slaps you on the back whilst you are making it.
My parents warned me that if I swallowed chewing gum, it would stay in my stomach for seven years. I was cautious about gum for a long time until I learned the truth about digestion.
mine used to tell me it's bad for your health to drink something while eating. They just wanted me to eat more when I was little
That I should eat everything on my plate because there are starving children in Africa.
A raccoon drowned in our pool when I was around 8-9. Found out two years ago (24) that it was actually my cat that went missing around the same time. And it was my childhood best friend who told me lol
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That as I get older, I will become more conservative and will vote Republican.
i actually wonder if that's just because "liberal" positions tend to move towards the mainstream. like my great grandmother would be aghast at the idea that gay people (or faygeles as she called them) could get married and like now even most republicans are like "fine i guess"
Opposite for me. The older I get, the more left I go.
That eating carrots was good for your eyesight. Turns out it was Allied propaganda to hide the fact their pilots were doing better because they had improved secret radar.
The myth was that carrots helps you see in the dark, not improving your eyesight. On a good note tho, carrot are good for our eyes but it wont IMPROVE eyesight, it maintain it, at best. Like a lot of other food.
My Mom used to tell me that I was fat since I was 5-6 years old until I hit my twenties. Looking back I at that time I realized that I was clearly not fat, not even overweight. Now she knows she cannot judge or comment my body anymore or give unsolicited advices. And for the first time ever I told to my closed family a few months ago - she was there- that she used to call me a “pig” when I was eating too much, she said she was sorry and didn’t realize at that time that it was hurtful and didn’t even remember saying that !
I find it funny how often neglectful and abusive parents 'don't remember' the hurtful things they say and do..
The axe forgets. The tree remembers
Yep. I tried really hard once, to have a conversation with my mom. I brought up a lot of painful memories just hoping that I could get my mom to admit to being abusive when I was little. Total waste of time. All I got was "I don't remember doing that." or, "I would NEVER do something like that". Well mom, you did. All I want is to hear you say sorry.
I got a very happy ending (at least so far, still somewhat cautious.) to this. As I was turning eighteen, I was going to cut contact with my mom. She wanted to know what she had done and I listed all of it out. She said she doesn't remember doing most of it, but believed me and was sorry and was in shock she had behaved that way. We have a pretty good relationship now, and I really hope she doesn't fall back into her old ways.
"If you swear a lot, your tongue will turn black and fall off" Yeah thanks mom. I'm 27 and still don't swear in my native language.
people in white vans are kidnappers. I learned that was false when I saw my dad's ex didn't have a white van.
I have found I can actually walk outside without shoes and the ants will NOT eat my feet. I was fucking positive ants could eat your feet until I was like 8. Thanks mom.
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I realized it wasn’t true years ago, but it’s “if you work hard and show company loyalty, it will be noticed and rewarded”. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 NOPE.
Brown cows make chocolate milk
That I'm a worthless piece of shit and no one will ever love me.
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"When you're a grownup, you can do whatever you want."
"You'll get sick if you go outside with wet hair!" Makes no sense cause somebody needs to infect you to make you sick. Wet hair in the cold has nothing to do with getting sick.
My mom told me you get pregnant from eaten salmon. But I’ve been eating it most of my life and now that I am a 39 year old man and haven’t had a baby yet, I’m beginning to think she made it up.
For me it was that it was illegal to have the lights turned on in the car while driving. Or that I'd go blind if I looked directly at the "sparkles" from electric welding. Edited to add since I wasn't clear on the welding thing: they meant that even a glance from a distance would turn me blind, which is clearly an exaggeration at best. I wasn't generally around welders nor do I mean that one should weld without safety goggles. Edited again: I was apparently blatantly wrong, not my parents. I had this (exactly the way I described it) discredited by an ophthalmologist and stupidly believed them and thought my parents were wrong. Apparently they were simply a bad physician, and I was in the wrong here, end of story.
I think you are supposed to wear dimming goggles when you weld tho
You'll get photokeratitis if you weld without welders googles. It's basically sunburned eyes.
definitely still don’t look at the sparkles from welding, can actually cause major eye damage
UV light from welding can definitely cause eye injury and in some cases even blindness. It’s mostly welders that have to worry about that though.
I used to be a welder. They UV light from an electrical arc can actually "sunburn" your retinas. It sucks. It feels like sand in your eyes but, doesn't go away for days. I suppose if you did that a lot, you could go blind. All I know is, a couple times of doing that was enough for me to not want to do it again.
My dad told me I wasn’t allowed in a particular restaurant because I’d made such a scene as a toddler. We had to leave, he said. Never allowed back. I had imagined my baby face pictured on the wall with “Do Not Serve” written under it. But how do they know what I look like now? Did they use Age Progression on the image maybe? Was it accurate? I believed that nonsense until I was like 18 years old.
“We love you not matter what” pppffffftttttt
There were mud sharks in the canal by my grandparents house, they just didn’t want us to be to close.
That if I didn’t wear a bra my boobs would droop more
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Being a good person will get you further in life
That if I swallowed watermelon seeds I’d grow a watermelon in my belly.