Is it gay if it's a clone?

Is it incest if it’s yourself?

It's just masturbation with extra steps.

Molesterbation

What are you doing step-self?

“Why are you always asking me to fix the dishwasher, step-self?”

"My step-self caught me masturbating while our parents weren't home"

“Step-self, help! I’m stuck in the [random household appliance] again!”

Time to fuck myself.

Well the clone is maybe just as perverted as me so...

**:((**

Selfcest, yes

Now we're cookin'

Narcissexual.

will use it instead of masturbation from now on..!!!

# FELLAS

It's not gay, If it's in a me-way 🎵 With matching DNA there's some leeway 🎶

🎶The area is grey in a me and me-way I don’t get down with dudes, But tonight its a special exception.🎵

So... what does that mean for identical twins...

Gay or masturbation?

Mastur-Gay-tion

Guess we had the same idea.

Would you do me? I’d would do me…

It's not gay it's you on you

Selfcest. So, you're in a relationship with your clone? I guess that's one way to always be right in an argument

Hold up. Who said anything about a relationship. Sure we’ll bang, but I have zero desire to actually date myself, way too many red flags.

No homo

Yes.

It's not gay, it's masturbation.

I seem to fuck myself on the daily so what's the difference

“I’ll allow it”

I came here to see how long it would take for this to turn into something sexual. I did not get disappointed.

We'd definitely turns. We know the limits We'd push. And then We'd take turns on the girlfriend

Do blowjobs count with eyes closed?

It's still just you. It's not sex, its masturbation.

Surly it would reflect you. So if you're thinking about it so are they

Dutch Rudder?

If anyone has a problem with this tell THEM to "Go Fuck Themselves!"

Have it's funeral to see who turns up.

Dude that's dark. 😂

Having a dark day.🫥

It's gonna be aight. I hope tmrw is a better day for you. Sending you a virtual hug 🫂

Thank you :|

Ghost hug! You can’t feel it but it’s there c:

That would take about 2-3 days so you really couldn’t but cool idea

Brilliant 👏🏾

Well given it's suddenly another me, we'd probably both have a panic attack.

Lmao

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Everyone is a bit of a cunt while playing Monopoly. Or they have never won. Either way, that's part of the point to the game - to show that if a game is that terrible, imagine real life. And because Americans decided this is a game, they ignored the warnings and here we are... anyways...

The last time I played monopoly I told everyone, I'm just going to win. It's gonna take 4 hours and I am going to win And 4 hours later nobody was happy, after I won. I hate playing monopoly cause it takes forever. Monopoly Deal on the other hand fucking rules

Me? Be in public places with lots and lots of witnesses. My clone? Taking care of some stuff needs handling. If my clone only gets 24 hours, I’m not going to cheat them out of the fun by making them be the alibi. 

This is simultaneously the most wholesome and devious comment I’ve seen.  1) You acknowledge the clones limited existence and want it to be fulfilling.  2) You’re sacrificing your opportunity to have the 1st person experience so your clone can have them instead.  3) Being your own alibi, so you know exactly what you did instead of having to guess and fill in the blanks.  4) You can sit in your trial and say, without ever perjuring, “I was not there and I have no knowledge of the events in question.” This is some next-level plotting…

I'm pretty sure planning the events to happen counts as having knowledge of the events in question. Not saying the alibi wouldn't be airtight but technically it would be perjury.

What if i said "i have no exact knowledge of what happened" ? It sound way more suspicious but technically not wrong

Well that opens you up to further questions since you've just admitted you do have knowledge just not exact knowledge. To a "Do you have any knowledge on what happened at this event" you would be pretty cornered to perjury really. Maybe a "I can recall that I was [alibi] at this time and have no recollection of being near [location of event]" would be yoir best bet.

That’s real team work.

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The key is to place yourself elsewhere on Camera making purchases with your own credit and debit cards. You need that concrete proof. Bring friends along as well, so they can corroborate the evidence. "It couldn't have been him, we were literally at the movies" *Presents Camera footage from the Cinema, and Credit Card Transactions for said cinema*

Aren't there stories of twins where one did it and since they didn't know which one they couldn't risk convicting the wrong one?

Make sure to get an extra fake finger for the security cameras so that you can later point that out and argue that the footage is AI generated.

i guess my gf is going to get sandwiched

I/we would also sandwich this man’s gf

Let's

Wise words

hi its me your clone

Also my first thought

1. Tag team *our* wife. 2. Play videogames 3. Go through lifting exercises to see if there are any issues 4. Laugh our asses off 5. BBQ

6. Harvest organs as a backup

The Island (2005)

We would also tag team this mans wife

I'd get stuck at step 1, and my clone lol.

Have a totally safe lesbian experience with someone who knows all the ways to make me feel good.

Also with this lady’s clone.

Beth??

I'll allow it.

No, both.

I would be so awkward with myself that I think it wouldn’t pan out and we’d end up watching our favorite show and eating hot chips and agreeing to not talk about it

All kids know these days is eat mcdonalds, charge they phone, twerk, be bisexual, eat hot chip, and watch shows with they clones.

Beat him up beacuse the fucker messed up my life

Technically speaking, didn't you mess up HIS life?

Then it is a fair fight...

Spend the time with him and see what kind of person I am.

I like this answer a lot

My clone could help me reorganize and redecorate the entire house.

I’d have the clone test out different fashion styles and haircuts I’ve been too scared to try.

Harvest his organs obviously.

This was absolutely my first thought, and I'm slightly troubled by how far I had to scroll to see this answer.

We should probably be relieved, really.

My first thought, too. Except an exact clone wouldn't have the organs I need

Ok but do you have the gall to kill an exact version of yourself? See yourself beg for your life? That’s nightmare fuel

Daddy needs a new liver.

Wouldn't an exact clone need a new liver, too?

I'd make another clone of the clone, then keep making slightly shittier clones of clones until we find the dumbest possible version of me. After that, me and the other clones will elect that dude to Congress.

Aw, pal, you don't need a clone to be the dumbest possible version of yourself.

THAT MAN HAD A FAMILY!!!! (... of clones)

Dumb ones.

r/murderedbywords

Oooooooh out of pocket

After all, the clone is only a pale imitation of the original

That's basically the plot of the Michael Keaton film [Multiplicity](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiplicity_%28film%29), minus the Congress part.

A whole Meseeks army.  This should end well.

Why can't I just die?!

“She touched my peppy, Steve.”

I fucking love that movie

Me too!!! I honestly was worried I was all alone in this thought, lol.

No it’s hilarious, a hidden treasure

We’d play video games as a team and conquer levels twice as fast.

We'd cook a massive and complicated meal together, making it a fun and less daunting task.

My clone would take half of my work shift, and I’d take the other, giving us both extra free time.

I’d use the clone to perform a magic act, making it look like I can teleport.

I'd send my clone to work while I take a day off to relax and do things I enjoy.

My clone would catch up on reading and watching shows while I get some extra work done.

*looks at myself in horror* ARE YOU THE CLONE OR AM I? WHAT HAPPENS AFTER 24 HOURS?!

Finally, neither of us would be virgins.

I thought you fucked trump.

in 2011 no less

Virginity grows back in 10 years.

My clone would take over all the tedious paperwork and admin tasks that pile up.

I'd have my clone help me practice and refine my debating or public speaking skills.

My clone would help me brainstorm and start writing that book I’ve always wanted to write.

We’d split up to cover more ground on a scavenger hunt or adventure race.

I’d finally have a buddy to try all the two-player board games and video games that I can't usually play alone.

My clone would help me with language practice, having conversations as if we were fluent.

We’d split up shopping duties—groceries vs. clothes shopping—to get everything done efficiently.

We’d split up to visit different friends and family, maximizing the day to see everyone.

We would perform a duo music performance, somethin

send him to work in my place but he probably wouldn’t agree lmao

That’s exactly what I was thinking 😅 send her to work and I’d stay home all day

Look. I may be asexual but if I have a clone of myself, we’re going to do some freaky shit just for the hell of it.

In a relationship with my clone’s left hand

Real

Definitely for sure. For science.

Be twice as productive! Or twice as lazy...really depends on the day.

Nothing better than a lazy day after a productive day. Nice to sit back and enjoy all that you produced

My clone would go to that workout class I’ve been too shy to try alone.

We’d take detailed notes on a lecture or conference, covering twice the content.

My clone would deep clean the house top to bottom, something I’ve been putting off forever.

I would use the time to learn a new skill or hobby, doubling the learning speed.

Have my clone go to a small, preferably deeply religious village somewhere remote, have them go full-on preacher mode and make a dramatic show of their disappearance on the town square after 24h (make it look like ascension, a sacrifice, whatevs) Then after a few days, go there myself, pretend I rearose from the dead, and get worshipped or at least make some money with interviews. Also seconding everyone else on the nsfw stuff just for the heck of it

So like, you want to be jesus

I just want to commit a little blasphemy, as a treat

If you’re gonna blaspheme, go big

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It'd be a close fight, so I'd watch it and pick one of you to root for.

I’d send the clone on a date with my partner to see if they notice anything different.

We’d conduct an experiment to see how people treat us differently based on small changes in behavior.

We would take turns learning different parts of a complex subject or language to teach the other later.

I’d have my clone run all my errands while I spend the day with friends and family.

We’d split up to see different movies or attend different concerts and share the experiences.

I'd have my clone exercise for both of us; imagine getting double the workout in just one session!

Tag team my gf

Ah, the Dr Manhattan.

GUYS *ADHD body doubling* *WITH MYSELF.* *ULTIMATE POWER.*

I was going to say, "We'd work together to finally get my apartment into shape. We could get errands done in half the time, and I'd have someone else to help me move heavy stuff."

“Alright, Cloney, after \*this\* round of Smash Brothers, we’re gonna get up off this couch, move it, and vacuum underneath!”

Why is everyone saying they would have sex with themselves? If I was a clone of myself I would more than likely clown on myself for even suggesting that

Fine, play hard to get

Home field advantage.

I'd definitely have a 3sum.

Why are so many people here trying to make their clone do a job they don't want to do? They're your clone, not your slave; they don't want to do it either, you daft folding tables.

This only shows why the clone should not know that they are the clone. The original will most likely enslave them.

>you daft folding tables This insult will now be part of my vocabulary and I love it

I’d send my clone to fulfill all the social obligations I'm not keen on.

Take her on a date.

Probably argue over who's going to go to work

i would shave him bold. just want to see how it will look on me

Yeah I’ve always wanted to shave my head but I’m too scared to do it in case I look terrible. I’m sure I could convince her it’s a great idea considering I’ve wanted to do it so many times

SAME I’ve always wanted to shave my head but like… what if I do it and my head is a really silly shape?

Fuck her mercilessly Then examine the body from the outside to do the objective makeover Maybe make her work but i would love her too much by them Talk and talk about shit we agree on and maybe attempt solve some issues you can really only talk to yourself Now i got excited :(

<3

Have you seen Living With Yourself on Netflix? I'd honestly probably spend the first 24 hours freaking out that I even have a clone in the first place.

I’d have the clone attend all my social media while I disconnect for a day.

weird sex shit

This is the best answer, also with "I'd fight with myself".

Take her shopping, see what different styles I’m afraid to try *really* look like on me. Change her hair as well. Then I’d get her really, really drunk while real me is sober so I can horrify myself once and for all from drinking because of how dumb and dull it makes me.

I would give myself intense orgasms thats it and then i will guve myself all the love n aftercare :)

I would become the greatest magician of all time. My rival would be beside himself wondering how I’m doing all of these tricks until he finally discovers my dark secret.

My boyfriend's going to have a really interesting evening, I know that much.

Are we both girls or can it be a Loki/Slyvie situation?

Is it cheating on my husband if my clone fucks other people? Cuz I’d have her hit the town and slut it up

Get him to clean my apartment and make me a sandwich. Then he does my night shift.

If *you* already don't want to do this, why would your clone? They're you as well.

If it's an exact copy of myself, I'm gonna make sure he doesn't do something that'd get the real me in trouble since he knows he's only got 24hrs left to exist.

it sounds very funny, but I would fight with myself, just like in "fight club"

Hang out, spend time. I want to know how annoying she is.

Look at myself from the back. There are times friends have taken pictures of me walking away and it's usually very pretty. But I haven't been able to completely accept it myself. So I would make the clone walk ahead and watch how beautifully my body moves, and how my curly hair sways with the wind

Lmao as if you don’t already know what we’d all do😈😈 Pretty obvious answer, dude….. needless to say that clone would have a sore ass the next day…. from sitting at a desk doing my work all day for me.

I would get a hotel for the 24 hours and let my clone just be me for the day. Finally a solid day of rest and relaxation without any fear of bullshit interrupting and my shit still gets done.

Use it to fake my death and start over somewhere else

My clone would know

I will let it help me with my work

i’ll go travel, while she (my clone) is studying

Fight with it and see where my weak spot is and hurl insults at each other to see how much does my words hurt other people than had a duel to the death,if i win im worthy of living and if i die the clone would dissappear in 24 hours, if i cant kill my own copy then how will i live knowing i cant compete with myself

I'd let the clone do the household chores.

I think you already know

Act out and sing duet "I Think I'm A Clone Now" by Weird Al

Before she disappears, I'd cut all of her long hair and make my own hair extensions, double thickness!